Shitbook

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Study finds social networking taking up toilet time

Blame social media the next time it feels like forever for your turn
to use the toilet. According to a study released Monday, 32 percent of
people in the United States aged 18 to 24 say they use social
networking in the bathroom. AFP - Blame social media the next time it
feels like forever for your turn to use the toilet.

According to a study released Monday, 32 percent of people in the
United States aged 18 to 24 say they use social networking in the
bathroom.

[Somebody]

<OllieN...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:e83f7673-d40a-4d84...@f4g2000yqh.googlegroups.com...

> According to a study released Monday, 32 percent of people in the
> United States aged 18 to 24 say they use social networking in the
> bathroom.

is there a toilet paper app?

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Dec 5, 10:57 am, "Somebody" <sa...@northpole.biz> wrote:
> <OllieNort...@aol.com> wrote in message

They need a stink meter app. It will measure the stink and give
ratings. It will let you know when you need to do a mercy flush.

[Somebody]

<OllieN...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:09880061-8a43-4c81...@r20g2000yql.googlegroups.com...

---

I thought it was called a "courtesy flush" and by then it's too late. The
cat is out of the bag, the horse has gotten out the barn gate, the eagle has
landed, the shit has hit the fan.

[Tommy Joe]

On Dec 6, 9:09 am, OllieNort...@aol.com wrote:

> They need a stink meter app.  It will measure the stink and give
> ratings.  It will let you know when you need to do a mercy flush.

An experienced shitter would not need an app to measure the
smell of his turds. Hell, I can smell mine before they come out. As
soon as my asshole opens I get a whiff of what's to come. It's a near
psychic experience. Either that or I'm blessed with a good sense of
smell.

A more useful toilet application would be a good pair of shit
shoes. Shit shoes are thin slabs of latex designed to look like
shoes. They are carried in one's pocket or purse and put on when in a
public stall in a place like a super market. If their shit smells
really bad and someone comes into the bathroom and sees their feet in
the stall, later in the store that person will be able to ID the
person with the smelly shit on the basis of their shoes. But if they
put on the shit shoes and remove them before leaving the stall (they
are flushable), no one in the store will be able to ID them on the
basis of their shoes.

Anyway, I think we know when our shits smell bad (or good
depending on how we're looking at it). The thing we have never
learned to ID on the basis of self smelling is bad breath. For that
we sure could use a machine of some kind. And I'm not talking about
garlic or onion breath. I'm talking about died in the wool foul
breath that comes from rotten teeth or something deeper within the
system. But for the smell of shit we do not need machines. We know
when our shits smell bad. And we love it. The only time we might not
like the smell of our foul shit is when we shit in a public place and
can be ID'd as the smelly guy and then laughed at by many people
because of it. At home alone that same embarrassed turd leaver will
be hooting and hollering in approval as the smelly turdal tidal wave
appears and lingers hopefully a long long time, remaining alive in the
room and strong in spirit long after flushing.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

The shit shoes is a great idea. Especially if you wear distinctive
shoes.

[Tommy Joe]

On Dec 10, 8:52 am, OllieNort...@aol.com wrote:

> The shit shoes is a great idea.  Especially if you wear distinctive
> shoes.

We've got em in all styles from wing tips to sneakers, take you
pick. The cost is more than reasonable, the shipping is fast, and the
product is proven in every way. You can't miss. What are you waiting
for? Ok, I understand, you rarely shit in public places and don't
think you'll be needing our product. Good point But can you be
sure? Better get a pair or two now while they're on sale. Contact
us, we'll send you the price list. We also sell turd-shoe cleaner for
those who like re-using our product instead of flushing it down the
toilet. Our product is disposable, yes - but it is also durable and
can be used many times. It has something and means something for
everyone - much like shit itself.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I am posting a LIKE on Shitbook for this post.

[Tommy Joe]

On Dec 11, 8:30 am, OllieNort...@aol.com wrote:

> I am posting a LIKE on Shitbook for this post.

I'm buying a new computer and will have it hooked up by cable
instead of dialup for faster speed because I want a Facebook account
like everyone else. Truly though, I am against nothing new, what is
to be will be - but I don't care much for the impersonal and almost
arrogant nature of people who use Facebook for receiving email. Even
the newspaper USA goes through Facebook now. If you want for whatever
reason to write a letter to the editor of that paper, you have to go
to Facebook to do it. The letters are now ultra short opinions with
no depth - just a bunch of 'yeses' or 'no's from people on pre-
determined "issues". It's sickening. I had a really good letter I
sent to them, only to get a response saying they now only take accept
letters through Facebook. It's like Grand Central Station. At some
point in time nearly every asshole on earth passes through it.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Liberty and Freedom is now the ability to LIKE or UNFRIEND an opinion.

[Somebody]

<OllieN...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:0961b220-ff11-42f3...@s14g2000yqg.googlegroups.com...

Liberty and Freedom is now the ability to LIKE or UNFRIEND an opinion.

---

As a UPS employee, I got an email that I could enter some dumbass contest.
As I entered it, it said I had to "friend" the UPSjobs site to enter. I
didn't want to but was bored so did. Then after I finished, I unfriended
it.

It says anyone can enter, but has to be via an employee. It sounds like
it's mostly to round up more indentured servants but they claim to be giving
away total of $2,400.
https://www.facebook.com/pages/UPSjobs/93397977942?ref=ts&sk=app_467462036627099

[Tommy Joe]

On Dec 12, 7:32 am, OllieNort...@aol.com wrote:

> Liberty and Freedom is now the ability to LIKE or UNFRIEND an opinion.

Good way to put it. Everyone has a big voice but ears are getting
smaller and smaller, mine included. Yeah, they have the freedom to
speak, as long as they have nothing to say.

TJ

[Somebody]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message
news:32f6a618-5803-4519...@eo2g2000vbb.googlegroups.com...

---

"Either/or thinking, also sometimes known as binary or dichotomous thinking,
categorical thinking, light-switch thinking, or Tea Party thinking, has the
emotional virtue of making a complex and frightening world seem simpler than
it actually is.

Here are some familiar examples of our tendency to see the world in stark
binary contrasts:

Men are this way/Women are that way (or Martians are this way/Venusians are
that way).

Whites are this way/Others are that way.

Good People are this way/Non-Christians are that way.

You get the idea. In fact, you probably depend on a few binary oppositions
of your own to simplify your thinking and help you get through life. I know
I do.

Yet the angels of our wiser nature call us to rise above such simplistic
habits of mind and to see the world as the complicated and bewildering
place it is. We are called to think outside the binary.

Thus when a complex question or situation arises and we are asked to respond
with a simple either/or answer, we must summon the wisdom to question the
question itself, and to envision not just two possible alternatives, but
three, or four, or many more.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Dec 13, 7:51 am, "Somebody" <sa...@northpole.biz> wrote:
> "Tommy Joe" <j...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

What a bunch of liberal shit.

[Somebody]

<OllieN...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:f0a0cc5f-568d-4e0e...@c16g2000yqi.googlegroups.com...

What a bunch of liberal shit.

---

When did thinking become the province of liberals?

[Tommy Joe]

On Dec 13, 8:51 am, "Somebody" <sa...@northpole.biz> wrote:

> Thus when a complex question or situation arises and we are asked to respond
> with a simple either/or answer, we must summon the wisdom to question the
> question itself, and to envision not just two possible alternatives, but
> three, or four, or many more.

Even if you didn't write that I will respond by saying the
paragraph above and those before it do not describe me. Sure, I'm not
perfect, but when it comes to being fair and trying to see all sides
of an issue I think I do a pretty good job.

On the other hand I am getting a bit sick of being too honest and fair
as I thought by now it would have paid off but I'm still waiting. How
long will being a nice guy take to pay off? I didn't think it would
take this long.

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

On Dec 13, 12:46 pm, OllieNort...@aol.com wrote:


> What a bunch of liberal shit.

Hey fuck you, you conservative bastard. Are you a McCain man?
Who are you pulling for next time? You sound like a John McCain man.
I'm an Obama guy. I will kill for Barrack. Are you willing to kill
for John? If not, shut the fuck up and get back in the midstream
where you belong, you worm. Just kidding, I agree with you - Somebody
deserves to die for posting that shit.

TJ

[Somebody]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:42acadf2-ec78-47f7...@x10g2000yqx.googlegroups.com...

---

nice guys finish last... That's what she said.

[Somebody]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:d7038fe8-50b2-4f0b...@x10g2000yqx.googlegroups.com...

---

Do SB allow posting of photos, and videos?

[OllieN...@aol.com]

My goal is to be nothing politically.

[Tommy Joe]

On Dec 14, 7:22 am, OllieNort...@aol.com wrote:

> My goal is to be nothing politically.

It's not possible to stay out of it. Even if your non political
stance is honest it will become your new label. I'm about as free
from it as possible, but the bombardment cannot be totally ignored.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I got my stances. I am slowly learning no one cares what they are
unless they can use it to get a vote to get elected to a cushy
political office where they can rape you.

[Somebody]

Does Mr S- have a Shitter acoount? What's his #hashtag? I'd like to follow
him and his "shits" on Shitter.

[Tommy Joe]

On Dec 15, 9:07 am, OllieNort...@aol.com wrote:

> I got my stances.  I am slowly learning no one cares what they are
> unless they can use it to get a vote to get elected to a cushy
> political office where they can rape you.

Yeah, and their their job is only cushy in relation to your job
because it's still a job and they still have to show up even if it's
to just pretend to be doing something. It's work, it sucks, and
everybody's doing it.

It's like wow, really happening right now man,
TJ

[Tommy Joe]

On Dec 15, 9:46 am, "Somebody" <sa...@northpole.biz> wrote:


> Does Mr S- have a Shitter acoount?  What's his #hashtag?  I'd like to follow
> him and his "shits" on Shitter.

If Mr Shit had an account he'd probably drift from it's
original purpose and feel obligated to say things even when he's not
in the mood. Like a 24/7 tv station that cannot possibly stay true to
it's original label, so too would Mr Shit deviate from that limited
space and turn to a bunch of unworthy scribblings to fill his daily
scribble quota. Mr Shit will not allow this to happen. That is why
he doesn't have an account of any kind, not even a blog. Look at the
stations, how they intermingle and betray their labels. Right now I
have a sports station on, volume low, background noise, and they're
talking about the killing in Connecticut. What the fuck does that
have to do with sports? The NFL and other major sports are a great
advertising tool for the government and all it's branches. The
combination is sickening. And to think at one time I thought the
national anthem was sickening. That was just the start of it. Mr
Shit does not like what layman call bullshit. He is very much an
honest man. True to the core, like shit itself.

TJ

[Somebody]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:116aa633-5dfe-4165...@c16g2000yqi.googlegroups.com...

---

I noticed in passing a news headline that said NFL teams pay tribute to
victims in Connecticut.... People die everyday. It was terrible what
happened, but every death is terrible.

Also inadvertently heard this evening that the Pope is now on Twitter.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Dec 17, 1:03 am, "Somebody" <sa...@northpole.biz> wrote:
> "Tommy Joe" <j...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

Every day a US drone is killing childern somewhere in the world. I
will give up my assult weapons when the US gives up its drones.

[Tommy Joe]

On Dec 17, 2:03 am, "Somebody" <sa...@northpole.biz> wrote:

> I noticed in passing a news headline that said NFL teams pay tribute to
> victims in Connecticut....  People die everyday.  It was terrible what
> happened, but every death is terrible.
>
> Also inadvertently heard this evening that the Pope is now on Twitter.

Cant you understand, Somebody? They are paying homage to kids as a
ruse for paying larger homage to the troops, the police, the law, and
the government and a whole bunch of other shit related to it. It was
all over the NFL. It's the new Nazi I'm telling you. It's not the
like the old stuff. It's new and advanced and acceptable. it's an
advertisement. Most will buy. If something is advertised often
enough, surely they will buy. I don't care. I'm not complaining.
I'm just telling you it's a competitive world in which more and more
people have to share the pie to keep things from going out of
control. People have to get together now and then or things will
explode. So they use any chance they get to pretend they agree on
something. It's like needing Christmas to give someone a present, or
the 4th of July to have a cookout. An excuse to get together and
pretend to be friends because we're really terrified of each other.

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

On Dec 17, 8:48 am, OllieNort...@aol.com wrote:

> Every day a US drone is killing childern somewhere in the world.  I
> will give up my assult weapons when the US gives up its drones.

Assault weapons? Why, you cheap punk, I'll strangle you with my
bare hands. I don't need no weapons. I'm against the drones, but I
don't like your assault rifles either. I say let's level the playing
field and go toe to toe. Face to face, eyeball to eyeball, nose to
nose, just you, just me. Want a piece of me, punk? Well, do ya?

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

You ever hear of an equalizer? well I need a more than that. Only a
fool goes into an even fight. If and when I am in a fight it will be
at a time and place and with the weapon of my choosing. You come at
me with fists I will have a knife, you come at me with a gun and I
will use a drone. I am an American don't fuck with me.

[Somebody]

On Dec 17, 8:48 am, OllieNort...@aol.com wrote:

> Every day a US drone is killing childern somewhere in the world. I
> will give up my assult weapons when the US gives up its drones.

----

Mitch McConnell is an assault weapon of mass droning.

[Tommy Joe]

On Dec 18, 8:28 am, OllieNort...@aol.com wrote:

> You ever hear of an equalizer?  well I need a more than that.  Only a
> fool goes into an even fight.  If and when I am in a fight it will be
> at a time and place and with the weapon of my choosing.  You come at
> me with fists I will have a knife, you come at me with a gun and I
> will use a drone.  I am an American don't fuck with me.

Ever see a golf match on tv when the golfer hits the ball and the
crowd yells "Get in the hole", even when the shot is being made 400
yards from the hole. It's one of those follow the leader things, the
"Get in the hole" comment. One that is right up there with "Get in
the hole" is the chant "USA, USA, USA". It started at the Olympics
when the USA was going up against another country. Now they chant it
even if both contestants are from the USA. It's like an excuse to
root for something. Maybe one day it'll happen on the street. Two
guys are stomping another into the pavement as a crowd gathers and
grows and begins chanting along with the kicks and punches, "USA, USA,
USA", as the unconscious street dude is pounded relentlessly by his
attackers.

TJ