Summer of Ollie

[OllieN...@aol.com]

This is the official announcement of the Summer of Ollie. More to follow.

[Thomas Joseph]

OllieN...@aol.com wrote:

> This is the official announcement of the Summer of Ollie. More to follow.

I hope so. If the narrative is like the intro I'll know it's going to be a bore. What kind of shit is this - to announce something instead of just waiting and doing it? These are the roots of deceit. Now seriously, as for summer, every year of my life I have looked forward to it. Only in the last two years have I don't absolutely nothing with it. I rarely go out into it. Today was a nice one. Then some big clouds rolled in and I was hoping for rain as an excuse to not go anywhere. It happened. It was huge. A deluge. The type that doesn't last long. But it lasted long enough for me to use it as an excuse. I the candy machine, then the steps back up to the 5th floor. When I got inside I looked out the window and the sun was shining. I am not living at all. At times I think I deserve to be dead. But I enjoy breathing and am not about to surrender my spot to anyone anytime soon - and that includes you punk, if you think you're up to making the first move. Come on punk, just you and me - "The Summer Wind" vs "The Summer of Sam."

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Will swim in the pool. Eat strawberries and ice cream. Watch porn. Yes an endless summer. I am dedicated to it. Please send money.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Will swim in the pool. Eat strawberries and ice cream. Watch porn. Yes an endless summer. I am dedicated to it. Please send money.

Your first $2.00 installment is on the way. How many people are sending help? $2.00 doesn't seem like much, but it is if enough people send it. Come on people, help is out here. Help me out here.

My summer is going well. I am on day 5 without going out. I even planned on getting up today but didn't. Around 3pm I said to hell with it, I'll take a pill and lie here all night and get up around midnight if I have to." But I couldn't sleep. So I took another half a pill and went downstairs for some coca cola and here I am. This is my summer buddy boy. This is it. I am a part of your summer and you are a part of mine. So glad to share this lovely time of year with you on this, possibly the last year of our lives.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Any year is a last year for some. I am not special. When the time comes it will be my turn. I will go without bitching. I have done enough for 10 lifetimes.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Any year is a last year for some. I am not special. When the time comes it will be my turn. I will go without bitching. I have done enough for 10 lifetimes.

I will go without bitching unless it's brutally painful or even worse if I'm gasping for air without the courage to kill myself. Gasping for air is bad. I think deep down everyone has a pretty good idea when they're going to die - unless they die in an accident first. I do feel for real that this is my last year. But I could be lying to myself. Again. I don't know - I just don't know.

Dear God in heaven, help me

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I will ask God to help you. if he gives me any good ideas I will let you know. If I don't agree with them then I wont.

[Thomas Joseph]

> I will ask God to help you. if he gives me any good ideas I will let you know. If I don't agree with them then I won't.


Please don't pester him on my behalf. Believe me I know the guy - he can be very impatient. I don't want you to push things with him. Don't worry about me. Stay out of it, please. I will find my own way. Then on the other side we can meet up with others of our ilk - many we never knew existed - and together as one united force we can at last get together and take the Big Boy down once and for all. I know he's tough, hard to handle. But if there's enough of us, and if we're smart - believe me, we can take him. Let's do this thing.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Wednesday, May 12, 2021 at 10:10:51 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > I will ask God to help you. if he gives me any good ideas I will let you know. If I don't agree with them then I won't.
>
>
> Please don't pester him on my behalf. Believe me I know the guy - he can be very impatient. I don't want you to push things with him. Don't worry about me. Stay out of it, please. I will find my own way. Then on the other side we can meet up with others of our ilk - many we never knew existed - and together as one united force we can at last get together and take the Big Boy down once and for all. I know he's tough, hard to handle. But if there's enough of us, and if we're smart - believe me, we can take him. Let's do this thing.

That is the story of Lucifer. He was going to take him down. What part about omnipotent does he not understand? I guess that is what pride does for you.

The few The proud the Dead

[Thomas Joseph]

> That is the story of Lucifer. He was going to take him down. What part about omnipotent does he not understand? I guess that is what pride does for you.
>
> The few The proud the Dead

I am not going to single out any religious as more insane than another. But I have trouble seeing how anyone can believe exactly what another person believes. It's like there are only so many religions to choose and if you want one you have to choose from the official form. And how about people who suddenly find Christ in their lives? Has this ever happened to anyone who never heard of Christ before? Of course not. That would be a great gimmick though, to find an aboriginal bushman who swears he saw a vision and is asked to draw what he saw and he draws Christ. This could be video'd. "Come on people - if this isn't proof I don't know what is", says the preacher, the bushman on his knees on stage, bowing over and over again to the heaven mumbling the only English word he knows, "Jesus", over and over again as Muslim, Hindu, and Buddhist viewers tuning in around the world find themselves pissed to be Johnny Come Latelys on this one.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

We yearn for it but not enough to give up any free time for it.

[Thomas Joseph]

> We yearn for it but not enough to give up any free time for it.

Every night I pray for the guts to get what I'm after without giving up my free time. Do I have what it takes? Yes. Can I do it? Yes. Will I do it? Ah, now that is different story. The answer is no, I will not do it - and I don't care what it is - from now on I am doing nothing (because I am nothing).

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Sunday, May 16, 2021 at 6:16:36 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > We yearn for it but not enough to give up any free time for it.
> Every night I pray for the guts to get what I'm after without giving up my free time. Do I have what it takes? Yes. Can I do it? Yes. Will I do it? Ah, now that is different story. The answer is no, I will not do it - and I don't care what it is - from now on I am doing nothing (because I am nothing).

To do nothing is doing something. Something for nothing. It is the law.

[Thomas Joseph]

> To do nothing is doing something. Something for nothing. It is the law.

In the reform school you did what they said, went where they told you to go, etc. Fine, I needed it. No talking allowed, ever - except to raise one's hand in the 'Lavo' and ask the Rollo Boy for another square of TP. We were outside in the yard a lot. You had to move around. Find something to do even if there were no organized activities. It was called activity. If the Brother saw a kid just standing around he would blow his whistle and shout, "Activity, activity", which meant move, do something, or else. Also, the opposite, in the pool in the summer, if you got too close to another kid the whistle would blow and the Brother would yell, "Body contact!", warning the offenders to put some separation between them. A really wild perverted place. Comic books were allowed. But they had to be animals. No Blondie, no Veronica allowed. Really. And we were allowed to smoke. Cigarets were in a locker and doled out weekly. They were used as a punishment tool. For instance if something wrong happened and they nobody would own up to it they would punish the entire division with, "No cigaret locker for a week."

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Monday, May 17, 2021 at 4:07:34 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > To do nothing is doing something. Something for nothing. It is the law.
> In the reform school you did what they said, went where they told you to go, etc. Fine, I needed it. No talking allowed, ever - except to raise one's hand in the 'Lavo' and ask the Rollo Boy for another square of TP. We were outside in the yard a lot. You had to move around. Find something to do even if there were no organized activities. It was called activity. If the Brother saw a kid just standing around he would blow his whistle and shout, "Activity, activity", which meant move, do something, or else. Also, the opposite, in the pool in the summer, if you got too close to another kid the whistle would blow and the Brother would yell, "Body contact!", warning the offenders to put some separation between them. A really wild perverted place. Comic books were allowed. But they had to be animals. No Blondie, no Veronica allowed. Really. And we were allowed to smoke. Cigarets were in a locker and doled out weekly. They were used as a punishment tool. For instance if something wrong happened and they nobody would own up to it they would punish the entire division with, "No cigaret locker for a week."

Sounds like boot camp. You sure you hadn't joined the Marines?

[Thomas Joseph]

> Sounds like boot camp. You sure you hadn't joined the Marines?

When comparing one unpleasant scene with another I always ask myself one question: Would I leave this to go to that? Would I have left the reform school to join the Marines? Probably not. But I guarantee you the Marines are easier than the reform school. It had its good points. I'm glad I was sent there now. Not then but now. As with anything else in life I learned something there. I am learning new things all the time. Even now as I post and see my own words flying onto the page I am learning that this newsgroup is my boot camp and you are my DI. Now whip me into shape or shut the fuck up.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Tuesday, May 18, 2021 at 4:38:24 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > Sounds like boot camp. You sure you hadn't joined the Marines?
> When comparing one unpleasant scene with another I always ask myself one question: Would I leave this to go to that? Would I have left the reform school to join the Marines? Probably not. But I guarantee you the Marines are easier than the reform school. It had its good points. I'm glad I was sent there now. Not then but now. As with anything else in life I learned something there. I am learning new things all the time. Even now as I post and see my own words flying onto the page I am learning that this newsgroup is my boot camp and you are my DI. Now whip me into shape or shut the fuck up.

I like your attitude. I need to adopt it as it applies to my own lifes experiences. I had things happen which drag me down but you are right. Those may be the things that make me what I am today. Able to understand and forgive others for their behavior. To know that we can go on to be ok in a not ok world. The what does not kill me makes me stronger. A halllmark card of hope. Thank you for your service.

[Thomas Joseph]

> I like your attitude. I need to adopt it as it applies to my own lifes experiences. I had things happen which drag me down but you are right. Those may be the things that make me what I am today. Able to understand and forgive others for their behavior. To know that we can go on to be ok in a not ok world. The what does not kill me makes me stronger. A halllmark card of hope. Thank you for your service.

I am a life coach, didn't you know that? I have tutored the best. I've been around. Of course I don't know it all, never said I did - but I can set you on the right road for sure. Thanks for your acceptance.

Speaking of life coaches, yesterday I stopped by the downtown transit center where I use a bike rack to do dips. When I started I couldn't do one. Now I can 13. Big deal. But it's something. Anyway, I'm at the bar yesterday and a semi-drunk middle aged Negro was watching and yelling, "One more, come on - give me one more." Then when I was done with that set, catching my breath, he was yelling, "I want 5 this time." As I'm doing them I progressively weaken, going from 13 or whatever down to 10, then 8, all the way down the just one. I go to failure. Anyway, the guy was coaching me. I know why. He was pulling the old "I was watching your car while you were gone" routine. You know the one, right? You have parked your car and gone shopping or whatever and when you come back there's a Negro standing next to it saying, "I watched it while you were gone, made sure nobody messed with it." In the same league as the forced intersection windshield wipe down. Forced service that has no value to anyone. Businesses need to create new and needless jobs for themselves or they will go belly up. The guy never asked for money directly but I could see he wanted to. He hinted at it. He was an abstract existentialist bum. Negro style.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Funny and I know it is true. Down south we still got authenic negroes. That is what I like about it.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Funny and I know it is true. Down south we still got authenic negroes. That is what I like about it.

The ones around here are real homegrown, every bit as stubborn and unchanging as the whites. Maybe more so. As a rule I don't care for them. Not them directly, but what slavery did to them. I mean, they are still slaves today and they know it. I can tell they really hate or at least do not trust white people. It's very segregated here. I like that in a selfish way but also see how it does not bode well for the future. Anyway, I'll take a big city Negro over these any day. Or an ultra rural one, they're ok too. But the small town Negro is torn between the two -same as whites - neither full-on country or big city, something in between, something in conflict with itself, an ever evolving maelstrom of hate and suspicion and other groovy shit that makes things exciting for the future. "Our town's Negros can beat your town's Negros any day of the week."

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Thursday, May 20, 2021 at 6:04:38 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > Funny and I know it is true. Down south we still got authenic negroes. That is what I like about it.
> The ones around here are real homegrown, every bit as stubborn and unchanging as the whites. Maybe more so. As a rule I don't care for them. Not them directly, but what slavery did to them. I mean, they are still slaves today and they know it. I can tell they really hate or at least do not trust white people. It's very segregated here. I like that in a selfish way but also see how it does not bode well for the future. Anyway, I'll take a big city Negro over these any day. Or an ultra rural one, they're ok too. But the small town Negro is torn between the two -same as whites - neither full-on country or big city, something in between, something in conflict with itself, an ever evolving maelstrom of hate and suspicion and other groovy shit that makes things exciting for the future. "Our town's Negros can beat your town's Negros any day of the week."

It is time we look at negroes as a natural resource. Something to be utilized for all. We need innovative ideas on what we can do with them. Sure we got basketball teams but that only uses a few. We require a use that will take thousands if not millions of them. Maybe picking cotton. Man that is it. I should have thought of it sooner.

[Thomas Joseph]

> It is time we look at negroes as a natural resource. Something to be utilized for all. We need innovative ideas on what we can do with them. Sure we got basketball teams but that only uses a few. We require a use that will take thousands if not millions of them. Maybe picking cotton. Man that is it. I should have thought of it sooner.

We need to round up all negroes and melt them down to putty to use to build a bridge from America to Africa so people who are afraid to fly can visit the dark continent too. Or don't melt them down. Tie them together and put them in sturdy life jackets and string them across the ocean - a living bridge - stopping by in small boats now and then to feed them.

Back. Back to the beginning.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

A human bridge. Very poetic. Humans used to bring humans together. I love the idea. Do we have enough negroes for it? Or will it require importing more? A whole new Africa to USA migration can be started. But what comes first ? The bridge or the migration?

[Thomas Joseph]

> A human bridge. Very poetic. Humans used to bring humans together. I love the idea. Do we have enough negroes for it? Or will it require importing more? A whole new Africa to USA migration can be started. But what comes first ? The bridge or the migration?

This is the future. We must go beyond the Negro. Yes the bulk of the bridge will be Black, but other sections can be made from Latinos and Gooks as well as lesser whites with each ethnicity/sect receiving it's own separate section - like buying part of a highway. A truly international effort with the white man in charge of course. I picture mile after mile of truck tires coiled up with Negroes tied within to keep them together when the waves get nasty. It is a walking bridge - no cars allowed. We will soon be invading another planet to bring back alien slaves to help out. We want a walking bridge, a driving bridge, as well as a tunnel across both the Atlantic and Pacific. it is time for the peoples of the world to come together at last on the bridge of life.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Saturday, May 22, 2021 at 2:51:27 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > A human bridge. Very poetic. Humans used to bring humans together. I love the idea. Do we have enough negroes for it? Or will it require importing more? A whole new Africa to USA migration can be started. But what comes first ? The bridge or the migration?
> This is the future. We must go beyond the Negro. Yes the bulk of the bridge will be Black, but other sections can be made from Latinos and Gooks as well as lesser whites with each ethnicity/sect receiving it's own separate section - like buying part of a highway. A truly international effort with the white man in charge of course. I picture mile after mile of truck tires coiled up with Negroes tied within to keep them together when the waves get nasty. It is a walking bridge - no cars allowed. We will soon be invading another planet to bring back alien slaves to help out. We want a walking bridge, a driving bridge, as well as a tunnel across both the Atlantic and Pacific. it is time for the peoples of the world to come together at last on the bridge of life.

Wont the negroes shrivel up in the salt water? Like a bunch of raisins. People will be confused. Going to need to breed a special waterproof negro. Better start soon before global warming makes it impossible. Time is running out. Help Greta and the Hogg.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Wont the negroes shrivel up in the salt water? Like a bunch of raisins. People will be confused. Going to need to breed a special waterproof negro. Better start soon before global warming makes it impossible. Time is running out. Help Greta and the Hogg.

I was just kidding about using Negroes for the bridge. I don't care what we use, the bridge must be built. All the way across the ocean. Walking only. No cars except emergency vehicles. Rest areas, places to eat. Even fishing allowed. We must bridge the nations of our world. And we will. Nothing will stop us. We're going to build that bridge. Anybody who tries to stop us is going to have their asshole turned into a tunnel.

[Thomas Joseph]

If we want to circle the globe all marching in the same direction to reverse the planet's rotation and slow down time we are going to have to build a few bridges. The human circle can not be broken at any point. We can't allow oceans to stop us. It has to be the equator. Requires a bigger circle, more people, but we've got enough. Hand in had we circle the globe. Then we start walking fast in the opposite direction of the earth's rotation. There is plenty of food. Only those in the best of shape are used. If they're not in tip top shape now they will be once things get underway. From a slow walk we step it up till finally everyone is jogging, then sprinting toward the end as we can feel the earth grinding to a halt. We don't need Negroes and we don't want anyone who doesn't want to be part of the greatest united human effort of all time. This is significant stuff. We want to save the world. The only way to do that is to stop it. Let's roll.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Sunday, May 23, 2021 at 2:10:23 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> If we want to circle the globe all marching in the same direction to reverse the planet's rotation and slow down time we are going to have to build a few bridges. The human circle can not be broken at any point. We can't allow oceans to stop us. It has to be the equator. Requires a bigger circle, more people, but we've got enough. Hand in had we circle the globe. Then we start walking fast in the opposite direction of the earth's rotation. There is plenty of food. Only those in the best of shape are used. If they're not in tip top shape now they will be once things get underway. From a slow walk we step it up till finally everyone is jogging, then sprinting toward the end as we can feel the earth grinding to a halt. We don't need Negroes and we don't want anyone who doesn't want to be part of the greatest united human effort of all time. This is significant stuff. We want to save the world. The only way to do that is to stop it. Let's roll.

Negroes are good for a sprint but long haul we need nordic types. Skyving strong.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Negroes are good for a sprint but long haul we need nordic types. Skyving strong.

People are born with speed, it cannot be developed. But anyone can build endurance. Even the Negro. Get everyone out there chugging away and what seems like exercise today will be mere play tomorrow. We can whip them into shape - all of them, everybody. We need each other to make it happen. We can do this thing.

Will the circle be unbroken?

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I must object to the use of whip and negro in the same post. Please remove one or both of these terms.

[Thomas Joseph]

> I must object to the use of whip and negro in the same post. Please remove one or both of these terms.

This topic intrigues me - the one of how far do we feel we can go in terms of free and open discussion when Negroes are involved. Have you ever found yourself in a conversation and hesitating to use a word like slavery even in reference to non-Black people. Or to use the word black to denote anything negative, such as "Man it was a black day when all those kids got shot at that high school in Florida." Has that ever happened to you? It has to me. So you are right, open conversations with Negroes are nearly impossible. I'm sure there are some who can go beyond their skin, but they are few in number.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Monday, May 24, 2021 at 6:39:53 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > I must object to the use of whip and negro in the same post. Please remove one or both of these terms.
> This topic intrigues me - the one of how far do we feel we can go in terms of free and open discussion when Negroes are involved. Have you ever found yourself in a conversation and hesitating to use a word like slavery even in reference to non-Black people. Or to use the word black to denote anything negative, such as "Man it was a black day when all those kids got shot at that high school in Florida." Has that ever happened to you? It has to me. So you are right, open conversations with Negroes are nearly impossible. I'm sure there are some who can go beyond their skin, but they are few in number.

I been staying away from the negro. No use having to worry about this shit. Even whitey is getting harder to talk to. May be a LGBQT asshle.

[Thomas Joseph]

> I been staying away from the negro. No use having to worry about this shit. Even whitey is getting harder to talk to. May be a LGBQT asshle.

I went out today. Had the recertification meeting at 1pm with the building manager. No big deal, an annual thing. I figured I'm up, might as well walk to the markets. But I lacked the vigor. I went uptown and told myself that just getting out is good enough - a start on the road to wellness. Tomorrow is my favorite day of the week.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Tuesday, May 25, 2021 at 5:54:42 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > I been staying away from the negro. No use having to worry about this shit. Even whitey is getting harder to talk to. May be a LGBQT asshle.
> I went out today. Had the recertification meeting at 1pm with the building manager. No big deal, an annual thing. I figured I'm up, might as well walk to the markets. But I lacked the vigor. I went uptown and told myself that just getting out is good enough - a start on the road to wellness. Tomorrow is my favorite day of the week.

Now that I do not work all days are favorites. I like not being sure of the day of the week. The fact it is a day is good enough for me.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Now that I do not work all days are favorites. I like not being sure of the day of the week. The fact it is a day is good enough for me.

My friend Joyce who died would not let a day or even an hour go by without asking what day it was. I'd tell her. Sometimes I'd say, "What difference does it make?" She was depressed. Lived in the same apartment where she and her dead for some time husband lived for years. She had a life but no routine. She was a hoarder. Not materialist, just anything, paper mostly, barren envelopes and other shit she didn't have the guts to throw away. Anyway, I sometimes forget what day it is. Sometimes it concerns me but not often. I know it's from having less a routine. Plus, as I told Joyce, does it really matter? Not much. Imagine that on a TV interview program, the celebrity interviewer asking someone, "What's your favorite day of the week?", with the subject snarling into the camera and booming, "What the fuck difference does it make, man? We're alive, aren't we?!"

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Wednesday, May 26, 2021 at 5:45:41 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > Now that I do not work all days are favorites. I like not being sure of the day of the week. The fact it is a day is good enough for me.
> My friend Joyce who died would not let a day or even an hour go by without asking what day it was. I'd tell her. Sometimes I'd say, "What difference does it make?" She was depressed. Lived in the same apartment where she and her dead for some time husband lived for years. She had a life but no routine. She was a hoarder. Not materialist, just anything, paper mostly, barren envelopes and other shit she didn't have the guts to throw away. Anyway, I sometimes forget what day it is. Sometimes it concerns me but not often. I know it's from having less a routine. Plus, as I told Joyce, does it really matter? Not much. Imagine that on a TV interview program, the celebrity interviewer asking someone, "What's your favorite day of the week?", with the subject snarling into the camera and booming, "What the fuck difference does it make, man? We're alive, aren't we?!"

Make the day a payday and it is a favorite. Well I get paid on the day of the month not week. So now I got favorite days of the month.


Ollie

Make my day - pay me

[Thomas Joseph]

> Make the day a payday and it is a favorite. Well I get paid on the day of the month not week. So now I got favorite days of the month.
>
>
> Ollie
>
> Make my day - pay me

Saw something in today's paper about giving away free lottery tickets to lure people to getting the vaccine. Special vaccine lotteries. I did not read the article. Sometimes I prefer not reading the articles all the time, going with the headline alone, something more free and open about that. Interpret the headline, to hell with the article. I get my check on the 1st of the month but the date is not special to me because I live really cheap and low to the ground. The major luxury is not having to stress over being able to get the rent each month. It comes to me. With some exceptions of course I feel richer than I ever did in my life, money wise, just knowing I've got the rent. But hey, that's me.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

This soc sec check deal is sweet. Perhaps I earned it by paying in for years but I am happy to get it. One of the few programs I support.

[Thomas Joseph]

> This soc sec check deal is sweet. Perhaps I earned it by paying in for years but I am happy to get it. One of the few programs I support.

I know we're lucky to get it. Gotta live a while first unless you're some kind of celebrity. I think it's a sweet deal. I know people who swear they can't live on it - they must keep working. But that is not true. They can live on the checks, but not with the out of bounds life styles they have chained themselves to. Well, to each their own.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Saturday, May 29, 2021 at 4:05:46 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > This soc sec check deal is sweet. Perhaps I earned it by paying in for years but I am happy to get it. One of the few programs I support.
> I know we're lucky to get it. Gotta live a while first unless you're some kind of celebrity. I think it's a sweet deal. I know people who swear they can't live on it - they must keep working. But that is not true. They can live on the checks, but not with the out of bounds life styles they have chained themselves to. Well, to each their own.

I don't know if I can live on it or not but I am going to try!

[Thomas Joseph]

> I don't know if I can live on it or not but I am going to try!

I am no economics major but common sense tells me it all comes down to the rent. Months or annual overhead. Even if you own a home you're paying rent. Everyone alive is renting. We are tenants, nothing more. Fine with me. Yes, you can live on it. If you're doing it now living with others who benefit financially from you, then certainly you could manage it on your own if you have to. The big thing is the rent. It's way out of line and I can't see it getting better anytime soon if ever. People around here are paying $1500 a month for apartments. I never made that much money a month period. Most I ever paid in rent was somewhere in the $400s per month. Remember the guy I told you about, Blackie Gallo from the poolroom - what a character, had some great sayings. He walked out of many restaurants without paying. So did I. But he was famous for it. I only did it when I was broke or near broke, so I couldn't enjoy the meal, always wondering if they're going to get me this time. I have some stories about walking out, that's for sure. Anyway, one of Blackie's favorite sayings - again, in a really pronounced New England accent - from Providence Rhode Island, mob land but some nice guys - was, "You can beat the knife and the fork but you can't beat the rent." It is true beyond what he might have meant. It is the number one thing to worry about. Most things can be managed alone - food, car use, whatever - but the only way to lower the rent is to share the rent with someone else. That to me is a big NO NO.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Sunday, May 30, 2021 at 12:02:29 AM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > I don't know if I can live on it or not but I am going to try!
> I am no economics major but common sense tells me it all comes down to the rent. Months or annual overhead. Even if you own a home you're paying rent. Everyone alive is renting. We are tenants, nothing more. Fine with me. Yes, you can live on it. If you're doing it now living with others who benefit financially from you, then certainly you could manage it on your own if you have to. The big thing is the rent. It's way out of line and I can't see it getting better anytime soon if ever. People around here are paying $1500 a month for apartments. I never made that much money a month period. Most I ever paid in rent was somewhere in the $400s per month. Remember the guy I told you about, Blackie Gallo from the poolroom - what a character, had some great sayings. He walked out of many restaurants without paying. So did I. But he was famous for it. I only did it when I was broke or near broke, so I couldn't enjoy the meal, always wondering if they're going to get me this time. I have some stories about walking out, that's for sure. Anyway, one of Blackie's favorite sayings - again, in a really pronounced New England accent - from Providence Rhode Island, mob land but some nice guys - was, "You can beat the knife and the fork but you can't beat the rent." It is true beyond what he might have meant. It is the number one thing to worry about. Most things can be managed alone - food, car use, whatever - but the only way to lower the rent is to share the rent with someone else. That to me is a big NO NO.

I have no rent or mortgage and you are right I still pay it. Insurance, taxes, upkeep. In fact the actual payment on most homes for the principal is the smallest part of it. I do not believe I ever did a dine and dash. Been pretty good about paying for food. No shoplifting either. Although shop lifting food when a person is hungry is to me the most forgivable. But even then is the person Ethipoian starving? I doubt anyone in America gets that bad.

[Thomas Joseph]

> I have no rent or mortgage and you are right I still pay it. Insurance, taxes, upkeep. In fact the actual payment on most homes for the principal is the smallest part of it. I do not believe I ever did a dine and dash. Been pretty good about paying for food. No shoplifting either. Although shop lifting food when a person is hungry is to me the most forgivable. But even then is the person Ethipoian starving? I doubt anyone in America gets that bad.

A person can eat well and suffer in worse ways - in America. But off politics for a moment if possible let me say that I shoplifted literally thousands of times and walked out of probably every restaurant in Hollywood and some beyond in L.A. I did the same ones multiple times. I have so many stories about running out that I prefer to tell only one at a time.

I was at a poolroom with a new guy from Buffalo NY who had been around for only a few weeks and we were discussing our individual methods for walking out of restaurants. He started it by asking me my method. I told him I had more than one, it wasn't the same thing every time. He said with him it was the same every time and it never failed. I asked him what it was and he shrugged his shoulders and said, "I just tell 'em I don't have any money."

I told him I didn't care for that method. He wouldn't let it go. So we literally flipped a coin to choose his method or one of mine. He won the toss. And off we went. To the Copper Penny. I was nervous as usual but he seemed calm. This made me feel better. When we were done we walked up the restaurant where I told him, "Ok, this is your game, you're in charge."

"We don't have any money", he told the person at the register. All of a sudden a cook and one of two other guys came hopping over the counter blocking the door.

I took over. "When he says we have no money he means we forgot it. If you let one of us go we can get it." They actually let me go. I hit the poolroom about 3 blocks away and begged for the money, promising to pay it back that night if it meant having to hit the streets to do it.

I got the money and went back to the restaurant. I slammed the money onto the counter. "There it is", I cried. "You know, you people really should show a little more faith in your customers. I told you we had the money and there it is. I'm not sure we'll ever eat here again." Of course I didn't say any of this until they accepted the money. I have to laugh at myself for giving in to this guy's method and at both of us for flipping a coin. We couldn't have been totally broke if we had a coin. Maybe we borrowed it for the flip, I can't remember. But I gave in to the guy's method which we used only once with no success. Pretty funny.

[Thomas Joseph]

> I have no rent or mortgage and you are right I still pay it. Insurance, taxes, upkeep. In fact the actual payment on most homes for the principal is the smallest part of it. I do not believe I ever did a dine and dash. Been pretty good about paying for food. No shoplifting either. Although shop lifting food when a person is hungry is to me the most forgivable. But even then is the person Ethipoian starving? I doubt anyone in America gets that bad.

When I was in my 20s I could suck my stomach in really far. I'd wear a flannel shirt not tucked in, hanging down over my belt. I'd suck in that guts and get maybe 3 or 4 packs of steak in there. I did not like doing it but I did not want to work a job. I rarely stole anything but food. But I did steal on impulse a few times. Once I was in the Broadway Department Store in Hollywood. I was in my early 20s. I just had my stereo tuner stolen. It was a used one, never bought a new one, had no idea of the cost. So I went into the store to find out. The department I wanted was on the 5th floor. I stood around a long time waiting for someone to help me. Nobody came over. I walked up to a tuner and picked it up. Suddenly I told myself I'm taking it. And I did. I just walked with it in front of me with both hands, straight to the elevator down to the lobby and out the door, all the while expecting that fateful tap on the shoulder - which did not come this time. Another time in Allentown in my teens, same thing - no plan to steal, just went in to price a 9 by 12 rug. Waited and nobody came over. I picked up a big roll and put in on my shoulder and walked out. I guess looked like a worker. I don't know. Another time in Allentown, no shit, I was in a pet shop to buy another guinea pig when I reached into a cage with puppies in it and grabbed the friendliest looking one and put it in my pea coat pocket with my hand constantly petting it to keep it quiet even as I reached into my other pocket for money to pay the guy for the guinea pig. I have other such tales but I think I have overplayed my hand already.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Sunday, May 30, 2021 at 4:39:06 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > I have no rent or mortgage and you are right I still pay it. Insurance, taxes, upkeep. In fact the actual payment on most homes for the principal is the smallest part of it. I do not believe I ever did a dine and dash. Been pretty good about paying for food. No shoplifting either. Although shop lifting food when a person is hungry is to me the most forgivable. But even then is the person Ethipoian starving? I doubt anyone in America gets that bad.
> When I was in my 20s I could suck my stomach in really far. I'd wear a flannel shirt not tucked in, hanging down over my belt. I'd suck in that guts and get maybe 3 or 4 packs of steak in there. I did not like doing it but I did not want to work a job. I rarely stole anything but food. But I did steal on impulse a few times. Once I was in the Broadway Department Store in Hollywood. I was in my early 20s. I just had my stereo tuner stolen. It was a used one, never bought a new one, had no idea of the cost. So I went into the store to find out. The department I wanted was on the 5th floor. I stood around a long time waiting for someone to help me. Nobody came over. I walked up to a tuner and picked it up. Suddenly I told myself I'm taking it. And I did. I just walked with it in front of me with both hands, straight to the elevator down to the lobby and out the door, all the while expecting that fateful tap on the shoulder - which did not come this time. Another time in Allentown in my teens, same thing - no plan to steal, just went in to price a 9 by 12 rug. Waited and nobody came over. I picked up a big roll and put in on my shoulder and walked out. I guess looked like a worker. I don't know. Another time in Allentown, no shit, I was in a pet shop to buy another guinea pig when I reached into a cage with puppies in it and grabbed the friendliest looking one and put it in my pea coat pocket with my hand constantly petting it to keep it quiet even as I reached into my other pocket for money to pay the guy for the guinea pig. I have other such tales but I think I have overplayed my hand already.

So in total what is the amount you stole? 10K? 20K? More.

[Thomas Joseph]

> So in total what is the amount you stole? 10K? 20K? More.

I never thought about that. I'm good with simple math though. If I stole on average $5 of steaks 7 days a week for 5 years that would be 365 days multiplied 5 years which would $825 multiplied by 5 which bring us to a grand total minimum of $4,125 for five years. Is that asking too much? I wouldn't have the money today anyway. I never look back on money lost. Not in the long haul anyway. I stole mostly food. I was not a professional booster although there was a period where I stole steaks and sold them to a guy who ran a small restaurant down the street from where I lived. My friend Wally turned me on to him. He stole giant roasts for the guy. Wally was not a good thief. I'm not saying I was good (although I think I was in my own way), but Wally was bad, real bad - very obvious from the time he walked in the door. He got caught a few times. Finally after getting caught for the 3rd time he had to do 6 months at the honor ranch. But he came out of those stores with giant cuts of meat even I with my sucked in stomach could never handle it. I was not a professional booster but I've known a few in my time. Blackie Gallo - the "You can beat the knife and the fork but you can't beat the rent" guy - also did time at the honor ranch. His method for boosting was bold. He simply went about the store filling a cart with what he wanted then strolling out with it. He looked the opposite of a thief, whatever that is. But he was not immune to being caught. No one is.

"We've got you on camera. You're trending big right now."

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I am all for honesty. Stealing is wrong. But not being able to earn enough for food in a decent way is a crime too. I don't have the answers but I do know the questions.

[Thomas Joseph]

> I am all for honesty. Stealing is wrong. But not being able to earn enough for food in a decent way is a crime too. I don't have the answers but I do know the questions.

I do not feel guilty in the least for my past discretions when it comes to shoplifting. Some other stuff I look back with embarrassment. I did a lot of stuff more stupid than shoplifting. But yes I know it's against the law to steal but I also know there are many forms of stealing, not all under the same label. If I were ashamed of my shoplifting stories I would never tell them.

One night in the cab here in this town I dropped off a guy in a heavy drug area and was preparing to pull of when another Negro hopped in. He wanted to go to a market 3 miles away. I knew he had nothing. But I said ok. I had nothing better to do. When we got there he asked me to wait. I said, "Look, I know you have no money and I brought you here for free, so I'll just be taking off." He asked me to wait, said it would be worth my while. I had a feeling what he was up to. I decided to stay parked unless I got a call from dispatch. He came out first. And when he came through the door I noticed something different about him and couldn't tell what it was. The way he walked. Did he look heavier? When he got inside the cab he opened his coat and all kinds of steaks came sliding out. He gave me two of them. Thick New York steaks. I didn't really want them, plus I had to take them home to the fridge, so it was a chore of sorts, but it was worth it and certainly better than nothing. Yes, I stole as a kid, but as a cabbie I was way more open to taking chances than the average driver. I believe some of my actions as an adult along with my overall golden rule policy of life have done more than enough to bail me out in the eyes of God and any other mother fucker who wants to get in my way on the road to glory.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

It was human meat. He was the black Jeffery Dalhmer of Hollywood that was never caught.

[Thomas Joseph]

> It was human meat. He was the black Jeffery Dalhmer of Hollywood that was never caught.

When he is caught he is dubbed "The Black Jeffrey Dammer" by cops and media. But Black social justice groups take offense to it. "Why are our famous Black males always referred to as Black versions of of White people? When are we going to be recognized for our achievements without being compared to whitey all the time?" The case is taken to court and the ruling comes down - the killer's name must be changed. He must have an original monicker, not something based on past White achievements. A contest is held to find him a name. Millions of people enter. The winner becomes a multi millionaire. It is a Blacks only lottery - no whites allowed. The winner not only gets the money but 24/7 notoriety, hounded night and day by the press and even more so by Black and other minority groups to make sure he is behaving properly and not spending his money foolishly to make his brothers look bad.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Tuesday, June 1, 2021 at 5:40:18 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > It was human meat. He was the black Jeffery Dalhmer of Hollywood that was never caught.
> When he is caught he is dubbed "The Black Jeffrey Dammer" by cops and media. But Black social justice groups take offense to it. "Why are our famous Black males always referred to as Black versions of of White people? When are we going to be recognized for our achievements without being compared to whitey all the time?" The case is taken to court and the ruling comes down - the killer's name must be changed. He must have an original monicker, not something based on past White achievements. A contest is held to find him a name. Millions of people enter. The winner becomes a multi millionaire. It is a Blacks only lottery - no whites allowed. The winner not only gets the money but 24/7 notoriety, hounded night and day by the press and even more so by Black and other minority groups to make sure he is behaving properly and not spending his money foolishly to make his brothers look bad.

It is not possible to make them look bad.
Joe Biden calls them cock roaches. Not very nice or creative. But I am not going to rag on Joe. No we need to come together is we are going to heal the planet.

[Thomas Joseph]

> It is not possible to make them look bad.
> Joe Biden calls them cock roaches. Not very nice or creative. But I am not going to rag on Joe. No we need to come together is we are going to heal the planet.

I don't think any of these guys have much to say. But in the end Biden says pretty much the same things Trump was saying, only he's doing with that special "Joe flair", that special panache available to only a few politicians of which Abe Lincoln was one even though we have no video to verify the claim, as well as of course the initiative John F. Kennedy whose eternal hope give hope to all who live and breathe that one day, yes one day, our world will be not only at peace but in the throes of ultima Nirvana.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Nirvana is nice. I would vote for it.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Nirvana is nice. I would vote for it.

I always viewed Nirvana as being a blob or better yet nothing at all. Maybe a feeling similar to blowing your load for eternity. But even that could get old. So it would have to be a mixture of cumming forever with occasional breaks of sliding into the zone of mere existence where merely breathing is the greatest high ever. Nirvana, another word I never looked up. Ok, I'm going to do it now, see how close I am to it.

"(in Buddhism) a transcendent state in which there is neither suffering, desire, nor sense of self, and the subject is released from the effects of karma and the cycle of death and rebirth. It represents the final goal of Buddhism."

Ok, close enough. Sounds like true death. The only kind I'd go for. The other stuff - heaven and hell, coming back, all that baloney in its many forms - I don't go for any of it. Heaven can't come close to nirvana. If forced at gunpoint to choose an actual organized religion I'd go with Buddhism as long I don't have to wear the robe or shave my head and get into chanting and other related nonsense.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

George Harrison killed the popularity of those religions. A person can only listen to a guitar weeping for so long.

[Thomas Joseph]

> George Harrison killed the popularity of those religions. A person can only listen to a guitar weeping for so long.

Pretty fucking egotistical for a musician to say his guitar softly weeps. Come on, who's going to listen to a guitar solo they never heard before and go, "Wow, sounds like Harrison!"........? Sure, if it's something they've heard before. But to me a good musician stands out as identifiable by sound alone. I like some of the Beatle's stuff. But I still say some of their songs really sucked. I still believe the good ones were written or at least arranged by the producer George Martin. Studio stuff. Anyway, nothing against the Beatles. But I'm a sitar man. I can groove it all day for weeks at a clip. Ravi Shankar blew my mind with his riffs. his deep soul penetrating my own with his righteous sound - our sound, shared in spirit. Oh yeah man, groovy.

And oh so righteous

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Fucking sitars. How snobby that shit was. People pretending to be into the most monotonous music in the world. And the fuckers playing it smells like Krishna shit.

[Thomas Joseph]

=
> Fucking sitars. How snobby that shit was. People pretending to be into the most monotonous music in the world. And the fuckers playing it smells like Krishna shit.

I genuinely hated the costumery of that era as well as the short one that preceded it. Even the Beach Boys - saw them the other night on Ed Sullivan, once a week, Sunday night, a half hour - even they had a guy playing a sitar on their number. I don't mind their sound actually - not all the songs, but some of them - but I don't like looking at them. That goes for most acts. I am into the music more than the act. I like a good night club, been to many in my time - but never went to a big concert even though I had many chances. But in general when it comes to music I prefer listening to it, like right now as I'm typing this I've got Al Bowlly singing from the 30s. I know what he looks like. I know what lots of singers and musicians look like but I don't care and would sometimes prefer not to have what they look like thrust upon me.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Again you attack the music I love. If the Beach Boys had a sitar I am sure it was for a good artistic reason. You are starting to get on my nerves if I had any.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Again you attack the music I love. If the Beach Boys had a sitar I am sure it was for a good artistic reason. You are starting to get on my nerves if I had any.

It was just another test from me and it looks like you failed it. Unless you're hustling me. Are you hustling me on this? I knew you liked the Beach Boys. How could you not like them - being a Southern California trendoid and all way back when the group first burst upon the scene. I know deep down you want to mock my favorite music in return but can't because you don't know specifically what my favorite music is. Sure, I told you I like stuff from the 30s, but how do we know I didn't say that to throw you off? Point is you are right, I was attacking the music you love once again - but only as a test - to see how you would respond to negative, how you would react under pressure. I still don't know if you can handle the pressure when all the chips are down. I'm still testing you. One day when I feel you have met my standards we can team up and do something to shake this world to its core - as a team.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Tuesday, June 8, 2021 at 12:12:33 AM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > Again you attack the music I love. If the Beach Boys had a sitar I am sure it was for a good artistic reason. You are starting to get on my nerves if I had any.
> It was just another test from me and it looks like you failed it. Unless you're hustling me. Are you hustling me on this? I knew you liked the Beach Boys. How could you not like them - being a Southern California trendoid and all way back when the group first burst upon the scene. I know deep down you want to mock my favorite music in return but can't because you don't know specifically what my favorite music is. Sure, I told you I like stuff from the 30s, but how do we know I didn't say that to throw you off? Point is you are right, I was attacking the music you love once again - but only as a test - to see how you would respond to negative, how you would react under pressure. I still don't know if you can handle the pressure when all the chips are down. I'm still testing you. One day when I feel you have met my standards we can team up and do something to shake this world to its core - as a team.

The summer of ollie continues. Just spent an hour in the pool. The water is warm. Sun bright.

[Thomas Joseph]

> The summer of ollie continues. Just spent an hour in the pool. The water is warm. Sun bright.

Yes, and guess what? I knew it. I knew it because your posting time lately is around 4pm. I came in here an hour ago and the board was empty. "He'll check in around 4", I told myself - and sure enough here you are. Like clockwork. So predictable. It's your new job, man. No really though, when I saw your posts leaning toward the 4pm motif I suspected the pool could be the reason. You want the prime hours by the pool - the sun high in the sky. Do you wear sun block stuff? I don't. Never have. I'm half Arab. Plus I think the sun gets a bad rap. Must it always be about cancer and death as if other things don't count? In the long haul getting the sun is where it's at.

Can ya dig, man?

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Just spent an hour in the pool. Another beautiful day. I was thinking about sun block today . Getting brown. I have used it. When I was young and surfing I never did. Then in my middle years I started using it to slow down the damage. Now that I am old not as concerned about wrinkles and other damage.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Just spent an hour in the pool. Another beautiful day. I was thinking about sun block today . Getting brown. I have used it. When I was young and surfing I never did. Then in my middle years I started using it to slow down the damage. Now that I am old not as concerned about wrinkles and other damage.

I never used it in my life. I used to lay in the sun from 10 am to 2pm almost every day at the Roosevelt Hotel in Hollywood, taking dips every 10 or 15 minutes, reading the newspapers on the lounge chair, getting good and dark. It was the summer of unemployment checks. I never got them before but I knew I was going to be using their pool in the summer, so I gave two months notice to the guy I worked for at the Plaboy Liquor Store, asked if he'd ok the insurance and he said sure. He was a Jew. Sy Raff. I liked the guy. He was easy to work for.

He was never bossy. My job was stocking the freezer with beers and so forth and using their truck or going on foot to the occasional call-in order. Maybe 8 small deliveries per day. Not pushy. I had my own way of stocking the freezer. I was proud of it. I did a good job. I didn't pace myself the way most do - lazing about, taking their time. Not saying that's wrong, but it was never my style. I get things done fast - work really hard, then take a break. So one day after putting in a good hour's work, getting everything just right, I sat down on a box outside the freezer to smoke a cigaret. Sy walked by, paused, then said, "Can't you find something to do?" I said, "Sy, when the day is over you can check the freezer and if you don't like the job I'm doing you can let me go." I said it with a smile of sorts. He understood. I could tell. Also, he did not make his comment in a harsh way. It was almost as if he felt that's what owners are supposed to do, reprimand the lazy fucks that work for them, so he did it - kind of the way a lazy dog feels its has to bark at everyone who passes by, so it just slightly raises its head and a barely audible "Woof" comes out.

Wow, from lying in the sun to the freezer, what a long winded post. I am sorry. For the love of God please forgive me.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

For some reason I enjoyed this post more than most. It had a nice flow to it. It was written with real truth to it. I am going to recommend a Pulitzer Surprise for it. You say what is a Pulitzer Surprise? Well if I told you it wouldn't be a surprise.

[Thomas Joseph]

> > Wow, from lying in the sun to the freezer, what a long winded post. I am sorry. For the love of God please forgive me.
> For some reason I enjoyed this post more than most. It had a nice flow to it. It was written with real truth to it. I am going to recommend a Pulitzer Surprise for it. You say what is a Pulitzer Surprise? Well if I told you it wouldn't be a surprise.

Thanks. All my true stories are good. I don't mean they're well written, but I do tend to give them more attention. The stories need no embellishment. Problem with real stories is I'm running out of them. All I can do is go back and tell old ones, maybe a few I've never told. Not many new stories because right now I'm not letting them happen.

I said I do not embellish the real stories. That is true. Sometimes, not often, but sometimes, I will come to a part of the story where I tell myself, "This part is so way out they might think I'm lying - maybe I should leave it out." Double reverse disembellishmentationalism.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Years ago I found myself telling stories to be weird. I had become the old guy storyteller. Nothing new happening just old war stories and they did not even include a war.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Years ago I found myself telling stories to be weird. I had become the old guy storyteller. Nothing new happening just old war stories and they did not even include a war.

I have told real life stories to people who mostly enjoy them, but every so often I'll get somebody who challenges their reality. I don't like when they do that. Like the time I told Wally at the poolroom about the time when I was a kid at the quarry in Allentown with a guy who was a temporary friend when he told me he'd buy us some sodas to go with the sandwiches we were about to make if I walked to a country market a half mile or so away. I agreed. When I got back he said he had fixed me a sandwich and handed it to me. It was peanut butter and jelly and he said so. At the last minute instead of asking what kind of jelly, I opened the sandwich for a look and he had put a cut off garter snake's in the mix. I almost bit into it. He thought it was funny. I didn't want to fight the guy but he deserved something. I told this story to Wally who himself has weird stories from his life and for some reason he didn't believe me. Maybe he was just trying to break my balls. Wally was a ball buster.

Yeah, I can see you now - the old guy down the block who always wears a military outfit and talks about the glory days of a war he never saw. Or so they think. Truth is you did see action and plenty of it. You killed plenty of gooks and you almost got killed yourself. You did it for your fellow countrymen and now all they do is dismiss you as some kind of late in his years loony.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

People that were in a war will not talk about it. Only people who were in safe area during one have all the stories. So I never talk about it so people think I was in the worse of it.

[Thomas Joseph]

> People that were in a war will not talk about it. Only people who were in safe area during one have all the stories. So I never talk about it so people think I was in the worse of it.

You can have it both way. Just say, "I'd rather not talk about it", making it clear your memories of action are so brutal just talking about it could bring on a PTSD episode. The more you say, "I don't want to talk about it", the more people will clamor to hear it. Finally you pretend to break down and say, "Ok, just this once", before launching into a mind blowing expose of thrill-based civilian killings along with multiple frackings, some of which are revealed by your narrative to have produced on the spot hard ons along with heart felt on the spot laughter.

[Thomas Joseph]

Uh, I sort of knew it when I typed it but wasn't sure. It's not fracking, it's fragging. Sorry, it won't happen again. I promise.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Monday, June 14, 2021 at 3:27:26 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> Uh, I sort of knew it when I typed it but wasn't sure. It's not fracking, it's fragging. Sorry, it won't happen again. I promise.

I was in Nam man. I was fracking. Yep getting oil out of those slopes.

[Thomas Joseph]

> I was in Nam man. I was fracking. Yep getting oil out of those slopes.

Hey man we've been through this shit before - too many times. I told you I was in Korea. You keep talking about 'Nam. Yeah, it was rough - I know guys who were there - guys besides you. But it was nothing compared to 'Rea. I saw some of my best buddies blown to pieces only inches away. I held their hands as they died. One guy had his guts hanging out and I had to keep him busy so he wouldn't see it and die in a state of panic. "Don't worry, I've seen lots worse", I told him. "Hold on, the medics are coming." But they never came. And even had they arrived it would have been too late. My buddy's body was basically a tree trunk with all the wood chopped out of it - like a canoe. I saw lots of death in 'Rea. Was 'Nam as tough? Most guys I know who served in both events say no. Some say yes but they are in the minority. On that basis alone I have to say 'Rea was tougher than 'Nam. I hope this puts an end to our dispute.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Tuesday, June 15, 2021 at 12:20:58 AM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > I was in Nam man. I was fracking. Yep getting oil out of those slopes.
> Hey man we've been through this shit before - too many times. I told you I was in Korea. You keep talking about 'Nam. Yeah, it was rough - I know guys who were there - guys besides you. But it was nothing compared to 'Rea. I saw some of my best buddies blown to pieces only inches away. I held their hands as they died. One guy had his guts hanging out and I had to keep him busy so he wouldn't see it and die in a state of panic. "Don't worry, I've seen lots worse", I told him. "Hold on, the medics are coming." But they never came. And even had they arrived it would have been too late. My buddy's body was basically a tree trunk with all the wood chopped out of it - like a canoe. I saw lots of death in 'Rea. Was 'Nam as tough? Most guys I know who served in both events say no. Some say yes but they are in the minority. On that basis alone I have to say 'Rea was tougher than 'Nam. I hope this puts an end to our dispute.

I loved my time in NAM. Loved being in the shit. Hotter the better. Fear? Sure sometimes but the adrenaline was awesome. Then smoking heroin and unloading my 60 cal into a bunch of kids man what a rush. So 'rea was tough but didn't you love it? Come on and tell me.

[Thomas Joseph]

> I loved my time in NAM. Loved being in the shit. Hotter the better. Fear? Sure sometimes but the adrenaline was awesome. Then smoking heroin and unloading my 60 cal into a bunch of kids man what a rush. So 'rea was tough but didn't you love it? Come on and tell me.

Yes I loved it. But we were different back then. Sure, we killed civilians now and then - what solider doesn't? But we didn't target kids. We had class. Then one day a kid, couldn't have been more than 10 years old, throws a hand grenade at us and I have to lie there watching my buddies die, some with their guts hanging out. After that the rules changed. This was toward the end of the Korean conflict, close to the start of the one in 'Nam. Soldiers in 'Nam were known to take out their frustrations on civilians, killing and sometimes torturing them, with no exceptions - not priests, not medics, and most of all not children. It was our experiences in Korea that made the new way possible. In WW2 there were no atrocities on civilians. It started in 'Rea. That's when things got really rough and the end of the 'Rea conflict was a gateway to the early stages of 'villian slaughter in 'Nam. By the way, I was in 'Nam but saw no action. I wanted action. I begged them for it but they said I was too old. Yet there were guys older than me in the rice paddies. I think they were against me because of my time in Korea, afraid I might show their soldiers a thing or two that might rock the boat. Whatever the reason, they denied my multiple requests for action. Bastards.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Tuesday, June 15, 2021 at 8:43:24 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > I loved my time in NAM. Loved being in the shit. Hotter the better. Fear? Sure sometimes but the adrenaline was awesome. Then smoking heroin and unloading my 60 cal into a bunch of kids man what a rush. So 'rea was tough but didn't you love it? Come on and tell me.
> Yes I loved it. But we were different back then. Sure, we killed civilians now and then - what solider doesn't? But we didn't target kids. We had class. Then one day a kid, couldn't have been more than 10 years old, throws a hand grenade at us and I have to lie there watching my buddies die, some with their guts hanging out. After that the rules changed. This was toward the end of the Korean conflict, close to the start of the one in 'Nam. Soldiers in 'Nam were known to take out their frustrations on civilians, killing and sometimes torturing them, with no exceptions - not priests, not medics, and most of all not children. It was our experiences in Korea that made the new way possible. In WW2 there were no atrocities on civilians. It started in 'Rea. That's when things got really rough and the end of the 'Rea conflict was a gateway to the early stages of 'villian slaughter in 'Nam. By the way, I was in 'Nam but saw no action. I wanted action. I begged them for it but they said I was too old. Yet there were guys older than me in the rice paddies. I think they were against me because of my time in Korea, afraid I might show their soldiers a thing or two that might rock the boat. Whatever the reason, they denied my multiple requests for action. Bastards.

If I had known I could have gotten you in my outfit. We were like the Dirty Dozen, Kelly's Heroes, and McHale Navy all wrapped in one.

[Thomas Joseph]

> If I had known I could have gotten you in my outfit. We were like the Dirty Dozen, Kelly's Heroes, and McHale Navy all wrapped in one.

Promises promises. Too late now. It's over. I give. I cave in to it. I am at peace. I had my time, killed a lot of gooks. But I didn't care what they were. If they sent me to the North Pole I would have slaughtered Eskimos. But I want a good fight. Sure, I took out some civilians. Tempers run high. You see your best buddy's blown to pulp it's going to have an effect. Somebody's got to pay. If the enemy had surrendered right away none of the atrocities would have happened. It was their fault for being stubborn. Yes, sometimes it's best to just surrender. Better for everyone.

I surrender

[OllieN...@aol.com]

There are no civilians in a war zone. If they were civil they would still be alive.

[Thomas Joseph]

> There are no civilians in a war zone. If they were civil they would still be alive.

At the moment whether I really mean it or not I have to say I just really don't give a shit what happens.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Thursday, June 17, 2021 at 12:58:56 AM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > There are no civilians in a war zone. If they were civil they would still be alive.
> At the moment whether I really mean it or not I have to say I just really don't give a shit what happens.

Whoaaaa Hang on there mister! You better give a BIG shit what is going to happen. it is going to happen to you whether you give a big or little shit.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Whoaaaa Hang on there mister! You better give a BIG shit what is going to happen. it is going to happen to you whether you give a big or little shit.

I have not taken an actual log shit - even half a log - in a year or more. It's all ribbons now. I believe the therapist is right about my anal muscles being too tight. She says to get some surgical gloves and some lubricant and get my finger in there really high up and massage it in circles to loosen the sphincter. I have not yet done this. I keep putting it off. But I think I'm going to give it a whirl this week. Want to make sure I've got the right kind of equipment, gloves and lube, before I do it. I think I might even enjoy asking the pharmacist about it, especially if it's a female. I don't want to use lubricant that might be bad in some way. It is not the outer asshole I'm talking about, it's the inner sphincter. Gotta go in a ways to get to it.

Anyway, you are right - stuff is going to happen whether I give a shit or not - which is precisely why I don't give a shit.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

They have all kinds of replacements. Hips, knees, why not assholes?

[Thomas Joseph]

> They have all kinds of replacements. Hips, knees, why not assholes?

You go into an ass doctor's office and the first thing he says is, "I'm gonna rip you a new asshole." Speaking of which, before heading uptown earlier I took a shit - lousy as usual, just a mess, gunk. I used the baby wipes and all was well. Then just now I felt I had to go again. Another absolute dump came out. The cleaning was easier. I believe the only hope left for me is to try the rubber glove massage routine. I am ready. And I am going to ask a pharmacist about it, what kind of lubricant to use - and if it's expensive, can I get it in prescription form. Funny how when I was younger I could not afford to go to doctors - probably a lucky thing looking back - I always hoped if I needed something it would be over the counter but now always hope I can get it prescription style. You know, medicaid and so forth. Sometimes I'll see an ad on TV for some ailment and they'll say, "And Medicaid covers it", and I find myself feeling jealous and left out because I don't have the ailment..

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Saturday, June 19, 2021 at 4:38:53 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > They have all kinds of replacements. Hips, knees, why not assholes?
> You go into an ass doctor's office and the first thing he says is, "I'm gonna rip you a new asshole." Speaking of which, before heading uptown earlier I took a shit - lousy as usual, just a mess, gunk. I used the baby wipes and all was well. Then just now I felt I had to go again. Another absolute dump came out. The cleaning was easier. I believe the only hope left for me is to try the rubber glove massage routine. I am ready. And I am going to ask a pharmacist about it, what kind of lubricant to use - and if it's expensive, can I get it in prescription form. Funny how when I was younger I could not afford to go to doctors - probably a lucky thing looking back - I always hoped if I needed something it would be over the counter but now always hope I can get it prescription style. You know, medicaid and so forth. Sometimes I'll see an ad on TV for some ailment and they'll say, "And Medicaid covers it", and I find myself feeling jealous and left out because I don't have the ailment..

Assisted suicide and Medicaid pays for it!

[Thomas Joseph]

> Assisted suicide and Medicaid pays for it!

Assisted suicide, always found it funny. But now thinking about it, it's really quite interesting, how far they could go with it, 'assisted' being a pretty broad term. Lots of rules will go into determining exactly what 'assistance' means. If I'm going to use an assistant I want a hands on experience but with control up to the end. I don't want all the machines. Maybe just a guy in a white coat sitting by my bed and chanting, "Die, die, die", over and over again like a cheerleader, supporting the team - my team - all the way to the end.

Come on daddy, root me home

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Assisting is a big job. Requires someone like Egore from Frankenstein to do it. Did you know that Frankenstein is the doctors name and not the monster? The monster is called the monster. Bet you did not know that. Well I am here to assist.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Assisting is a big job. Requires someone like Egore from Frankenstein to do it. Did you know that Frankenstein is the doctors name and not the monster? The monster is called the monster. Bet you did not know that. Well I am here to assist.

I knew it. I know lots of stuff. More by far than average - and yet I know nothing. I like the feeling of knowing nothing. I am too blasted out at this time to continue posting. It is a chore. I am seeing double. I am not drunk in the usual sense. It's a physical thing. It's happening because I don't drink enough. I am not used to it. But it makes me feel like I don't give a shit about anything - and I like that feeling.

Good night

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I feel like that without drinking. when I drink I care. I care too much. I care so much I do not care what I do.

[Thomas Joseph]

> I feel like that without drinking. when I drink I care. I care too much. I care so much I do not care what I do.

"Please God, help to stop caring too much! Oh dear God what am I going to do?"

I feel like shit today and I knew it would happen even before I took my first drink yesterday. Drinking 4 times a year is my own personal non-higher power non-group version of AA. Four times a year I feel like shit. This is a good reminder to stay away from the booze. But in order for it to work you have to really feel like shit, you can't just fake it. I will tell you one thing though - something I noticed a few decades back: I don't need to drink to have a hangover. The non drinking hangovers are different from the drinking ones, not as severe, but hangovers of some sort just the same. Sometimes it's good to have a reason to feel like shit. Like having a short cold, that can be a good feeling if you're feeling like shit anyway - because now you know why you feel like shit. This puts you in control somewhat. Also, when the cold leaves the reason you felt like shit even before you got the cold might leave with it. See how positive minded I am, to think of the good that can come out of the bad.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I been feeling pretty good and I try to enjoy it. I hate being ill. I mean I really hate it. I hate it so much it makes me sick.

[Thomas Joseph]

> I been feeling pretty good and I try to enjoy it. I hate being ill. I mean I really hate it. I hate it so much it makes me sick.

I am lucky I am not sicker than I sometimes am. But I am also responsible for it to some degree. I'll take some of the credit. I really believe having no insurance and relying on emergency rooms all these years has saved my ass. They are advertising Shingles vaccines on TV now. Others too. Already people who have received the vaccine are testing positive. There was a line of people at the transit center the other day waiting to be tested. I would never stand in line with a bunch of people waiting to get tested for anything. Plus the swab in the mouth. How do know where it's been and what's on it? I too feel pretty good in an odd way. I feel quite unfit yet good in other ways - like knowing I'm going to die one day soon and I'm ready for it. A nice feeling to it. Just remember this: "You can live to be a thousand years old, but every 60 seconds that goes by you are still one minute closer to death."

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Tuesday, June 22, 2021 at 8:35:15 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > I been feeling pretty good and I try to enjoy it. I hate being ill. I mean I really hate it. I hate it so much it makes me sick.
> I am lucky I am not sicker than I sometimes am. But I am also responsible for it to some degree. I'll take some of the credit. I really believe having no insurance and relying on emergency rooms all these years has saved my ass. They are advertising Shingles vaccines on TV now. Others too. Already people who have received the vaccine are testing positive. There was a line of people at the transit center the other day waiting to be tested. I would never stand in line with a bunch of people waiting to get tested for anything. Plus the swab in the mouth. How do know where it's been and what's on it? I too feel pretty good in an odd way. I feel quite unfit yet good in other ways - like knowing I'm going to die one day soon and I'm ready for it. A nice feeling to it. Just remember this: "You can live to be a thousand years old, but every 60 seconds that goes by you are still one minute closer to death."

Never seen everyone being hypochondriac till this past year. The media and government is at fault. They love this shit. They pretend we need them. And many believe it.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Never seen everyone being hypochondriac till this past year. The media and government is at fault. They love this shit. They pretend we need them. And many believe it.

And the scientists. I need the government. Not the leaders though, not as long as they keep the old programs in play like the one I'm on, I can't live without it. Or let's put it this way, I wouldn't want to try. But yes, without a doubt a person could keep his face out of the papers and off the screen for a year and be no less wise about whatever's going down in the world if it really has any meaning.

The media - our first informers. Our verifiers. They are looking out for us. When we need the news they will give it to us straight. And Lord knows we cannot live without the news. We tried that once and didn't do well will it until Paul Revere came along and reminded us just how important staying up on current affairs really is.

The Town Weeper

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Send cash. The rest is a bother.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Send cash. The rest is a bother.

How about bringing back the town crier? The same guy every day delivering the same news. One version only. Then other town criers emerge claiming one source for information is not enough. Soon the streets are crowded and filled with noise with a town crier on every corner. It's like a TV set without separate channels. Separate info sources but all coming through the same street corner channel. Fights break out. Violence reigns supreme. This is when TV is first invented as a means to keep violent confrontation to a minimum. Lots of people don't know this bit of history, that TV was created to keep town criers from assaulting each other and instigating public misconduct and even killings.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Thursday, June 24, 2021 at 2:16:58 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > Send cash. The rest is a bother.
> How about bringing back the town crier? The same guy every day delivering the same news. One version only. Then other town criers emerge claiming one source for information is not enough. Soon the streets are crowded and filled with noise with a town crier on every corner. It's like a TV set without separate channels. Separate info sources but all coming through the same street corner channel. Fights break out. Violence reigns supreme. This is when TV is first invented as a means to keep violent confrontation to a minimum. Lots of people don't know this bit of history, that TV was created to keep town criers from assaulting each other and instigating public misconduct and even killings.

Forget news I want rumor and innuendo. Did I spell innuendo correctly? Not getting a spell check on it. I sometimes amaze myself with being able to spell some words. Spelling is not a strength I have. In fact when it comes to most things I suck. Except for sucking.

[Thomas Joseph]

> Forget news I want rumor and innuendo. Did I spell innuendo correctly? Not getting a spell check on it. I sometimes amaze myself with being able to spell some words. Spelling is not a strength I have. In fact when it comes to most things I suck. Except for sucking.

I am good at most things but not spectacular, mainly because I am not willing to put any work into it. That could be an excuse for being a loser. If so it's the only one I've got. Besides, I enjoy being a loser. I know what you mean about the spell checker. I sometimes spell a word correctly and amaze myself. I even question the spell checker at that point. But only for a moment. Some words give me trouble over and over. Aficionado was one. For the longest time until finally I decided to take my time and look it over. I had two problems with that word. If I got one right I would still get the other wrong. First I used to misspell it mainly by using two 'F's. It takes only. Then even when I got the single F correct, I'd use an 'a' instead of an 'o' in the middle of the word. Finally I got it right and I haven't misspelled it in a long time. And that's good because I like using the word. I am an aficionado of spelling connoisseur correctly. That's another word, similar in meaning to aficionado, that I always had trouble with. How about really short words that the longer you stare at them the more they look wrong even if they're not. I can't think of any examples, and maybe they're not need anyway. I think you know what I mean, just some common every day word with usual just one syllable and the more you look at the more wrong it looks.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Friday, June 25, 2021 at 4:14:53 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > Forget news I want rumor and innuendo. Did I spell innuendo correctly? Not getting a spell check on it. I sometimes amaze myself with being able to spell some words. Spelling is not a strength I have. In fact when it comes to most things I suck. Except for sucking.
> I am good at most things but not spectacular, mainly because I am not willing to put any work into it. That could be an excuse for being a loser. If so it's the only one I've got. Besides, I enjoy being a loser. I know what you mean about the spell checker. I sometimes spell a word correctly and amaze myself. I even question the spell checker at that point. But only for a moment. Some words give me trouble over and over. Aficionado was one. For the longest time until finally I decided to take my time and look it over. I had two problems with that word. If I got one right I would still get the other wrong. First I used to misspell it mainly by using two 'F's. It takes only. Then even when I got the single F correct, I'd use an 'a' instead of an 'o' in the middle of the word. Finally I got it right and I haven't misspelled it in a long time. And that's good because I like using the word. I am an aficionado of spelling connoisseur correctly. That's another word, similar in meaning to aficionado, that I always had trouble with. How about really short words that the longer you stare at them the more they look wrong even if they're not. I can't think of any examples, and maybe they're not need anyway. I think you know what I mean, just some common every day word with usual just one syllable and the more you look at the more wrong it looks.

I bet the reason for an a instead of o in words is perhaps regional accents. Not speaking perfect English. Well spelling is racist.

[Thomas Joseph]

> I bet the reason for an a instead of o in words is perhaps regional accents. Not speaking perfect English. Well spelling is racist.

NO - (N word) - it is NOT (N word). "Not (N word) speaking perfect English is not only not racist, it stems from not wanting to sound racist. Like in the beginning when people first learned that saying "nigger" was wrong they would try to pronounce it differently to make it sound less offensive. That is how "Nigra" came into vogue. The evolution of the Negro's status by name or label is on-going and never ends. Right now Black with a capitol B seems to be the biggest hit, but that could change tomorrow. We just don't know. But I can guarantee you whatever word they chose I will comply with it because I care and want to make sure everyone knows I don't have a racist bone in my body. I am all inclusive. No borders. Freedom for all. We can do this thing. We are all in it together.

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On Monday, June 28, 2021 at 4:40:10 PM UTC-4, jazee...@gmail.com wrote:
> > I bet the reason for an a instead of o in words is perhaps regional accents. Not speaking perfect English. Well spelling is racist.
> NO - (N word) - it is NOT (N word). "Not (N word) speaking perfect English is not only not racist, it stems from not wanting to sound racist. Like in the beginning when people first learned that saying "nigger" was wrong they would try to pronounce it differently to make it sound less offensive. That is how "Nigra" came into vogue. The evolution of the Negro's status by name or label is on-going and never ends. Right now Black with a capitol B seems to be the biggest hit, but that could change tomorrow. We just don't know. But I can guarantee you whatever word they chose I will comply with it because I care and want to make sure everyone knows I don't have a racist bone in my body. I am all inclusive. No borders. Freedom for all. We can do this thing. We are all in it together.

Out traveling across the USA most people are white in the countryside. Some mexicans too. The blacks have mostly holed up in big cities. They are being kept as pets. Like pit bulls being raised to fight and kill each other. Whitey is the bait used to rile them up.