Going off the grid

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Will be back next week.

[Tommy Joe]

On May 8, 9:28 pm, OllieNort...@aol.com wrote:




> Will be back next week.

Now it's me alone. This will give me a chance to see what I'm all
about. How will I handle it? Will I sit around sulking or will I get
up and find something worthwhile to fill the void? I don't know. A
week you say? Our newsgroup buddy Somebody said 3 or 4 days and look
what happened there, he never came back. Please don't bullshit your
way out of the group with false short-term vacations that turn into
never returns. Don't con me. Don't play with me. Don't lie to me.
Ever. A week you say? I'm counting. This will be a perfect
opportunity for me to see just honest a person you really are.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

If I am not back by Tuesday send Somebody to look for me. But don't
send that fucker Gus.

[Smitty]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message
news:5244c013-371b-4f46...@y5g2000yqy.googlegroups.com...

This sounds like the situation in Cleveland, and cases such as as Elisabeth
Smart. Where the relationship is very unbalanced and one person wields
power over the other.

This may help:

What prevented these women from crying out or breaking free whenever they
had the chance? It's too glib simply to invoke the go-to "Stockholm
Syndrome," the phenomenon of captives eventually identifying with their
captors, and leave it at that. But it's nonetheless a big part of things.
Walch speaks of a "learned helplessness" that quickly follows a kidnapping.
At first there is indeed the scratching and fighting and hollering that we
all imagine we'd be able to keep up indefinitely. But slowly, victims
surrender to powerlessness, something that is accelerated if the kidnapper
shows a willingness to inflict pain, but also to withhold it.

"Instead of being tortured, you [receive] kindness," says Walch."You are
given a drop of water, you're not beaten. You begin to develop feelings of
gratitude. Over time it wears on even the strongest person." The human need
for affiliation asserts itself too. Being in the physical company of
someone-anyone-is better than being utterly alone. "If this is your only
contact, you come to value that contact, so that even when given the
opportunity to run away or get help, you don't." That fact is important for
the victims themselves to remember as they recover, in case they ever-as
they well might-blame themselves even a little for the years they lost."

http://tinyurl.com/cywd5yv


Do you feel stuck in a bad situation? Do you tend to give up easily? Do you
feel that no matter what you do, your life will follow a pattern that is out
of your control? When you succeed at something, do you feel it is just a
fluke? If you answered yes to any of those questions, you might be suffering
from a common psychological phenomenon-- a devastating phenomenon that
affects millions of people every day and causes terrible, unnecessary
suffering for those afflicted. The phenomenon is a well-known psychological
state known as learned helplessness.

A person or animal perceives that they are unable to change a situation,
even if the situation is changeable. This feeling of futility is thought to
be caused by an individual's perception of events and their perception of a
lack of ability to control these events. The state of helplessness is
learned after an individual's attempts to correct situations failed, or were
perceived to have failed. The feeling of helplessness is often expanded to
future encounters with similar situations, or even vastly dissimilar
situations.

If you suffer from learned helplessness, here are some helpful steps you can
take:

Find out what situations contributed/caused the feelings of futility.

Acknowledge that although change may take some time, belief structures can
be changed.

Make a compassionate decision to work on overcoming learned helplessness.

Find a good support group or therapist who understands learned helplessness
and can help guide you through the rougher times.

Learned helplessness can be very subtle. Because the feeling is so
interwoven with our deep beliefs about our worth and abilities, it can be a
challenge to overcome. Like any similar psychological phenomenon, feelings
of futility can become such a habit that we do not recognize that we are
involved in a self-defeating process. Learned helplessness can be overcome,
however, with time, patience, vigilance, and compassion towards oneself.

http://tinyurl.com/ctnhzza

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:



> If I am not back by Tuesday send Somebody to look for me.  But don't
> send that fucker Gus.

I don't trust Gus. I have been in touch with Somebody. He had
been kidnapped and tortured for months by Gus, who has since fled and
will never be found because Somebody is too embarrassed to go to the
cops. He also asked me not to tell you or anyone else about his
embarrassing ordeal, being tied down and tortured for months by a guy
he thought was his best friend. One night Gus left and never
returned. Somebody managed to chew his way through the leather
binds. I am telling you this even though Somebody asked me not to,
because I know he'll never post here again, he's so embarrassed. He
was also left disfigured by the grueling month long agony session, his
face so badly bruised and altered for life that no one will ever hire
him even though he needs work now more than ever. Maybe he can get
SSI or some kind of victims insurance. But to do that he'd have to
report the crime, and right now he's too embarrassed to go public with
it.

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

On May 9, 9:19 am, "Smitty" <al.smith...@prodigy.net> wrote:
> "Tommy Joe" <j...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

Welcome back, Somebody. Hey, going to the store now, will
respond to this post later. The captive girls story is intriguing.
They were all taken in their late teens. That means strength and
planning was required. Getting them that old isn't as easy as luring
younger ones in with candy. I will read your post later and respond.
And you will read it. Or else.

TJ

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

I can't stand pseudo experts like Walsh who to this day is making a
living off his son's death. Or was it his daughter? Cant remember,
don't care. The guy is no more an expert than anyone else with an
imagination. I am not a believer in the Stockholm Sydrome, not as
described by the so-called experts. I do believe a captive can learn
to identify with the captor, but there is a limit, at least for my
imagination.

As for the Smart girl, her parents were the same sort of scum as
the guy who kidnapped her. Of course they'll never see their part in
it. They were religious zealots too. She probably allowed herself to
be induced by the new Messiah because the crap her real parents were
laying on her was too much to handle.

I hate parents that cry about their babies running away from home
instead of admitting that they were chased more than they ran. it's
an odd story, this Cleveland thing - I'd like to take a tour of the
house before making any final decisions on what the girls could or
could not have done to get away. Were there any windows? Even if
they were bolted, surely one could have been broken through. One of
the girls was 21 or 22 when abducted. She's probably not as strong as
the guy, but still it's hard to imagine the guy dragging her inside on
his own. I'd like to know what sort of technique he used - you know,
in case I ever get the urge to kidnap someone and make them my own
personal slave. But once you take on a slave, your duties as slave
owner become too great. It's a burden. You want to set them free but
know if you do they'll sic the cops on you, or even come back and kill
you, or even worse kidnap you and take you to their place for some tit
for tat. Anyway, fuck Walsh. I'm sick of people like Walsh who use
personal loss as an excuse to start foundations and non profit
organizations that make more profit than we can begin to imagine. I
hate it, but I can understand it. That makes me hate it even more.

TJ

[b o z o]

On May 9, 5:02 pm, Tommy Joe <j...@bellsouth.net> wrote:
> On May 9, 9:19 am, "Smitty" <al.smith...@prodigy.net> wrote:
>
>
> > The phenomenon is a well-known psychological state known as learned
> > helplessness.
>
>

> > Make a compassionate decision to work on overcoming learned helplessness.
>
> > Find a good support group or therapist who understands learned helplessness
> > and can help guide you through the rougher times.
>
> > Learned helplessness can be very subtle.

I overcame my "learned helplessness" and now suffer from the inverse
of the condition called "instinctual helpyourselffulness" and now
steal everything and everybody I know blind.

-bdn-

[Tommy Joe]

b o z o wrote:



> I overcame my "learned helplessness" and now suffer from the inverse
> of the condition called "instinctual helpyourselffulness" and now
> steal everything and everybody I know blind.

Learning is bad. It leads nowhere. Instinct is the way to go.
Trust me on this. Go with your gut. Go in peace with your great big
gut leading the way and pointing you to the stars.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I see things are as usual. well I am back and no I was not held
captive. Although the way I feel being captive would be a nice place
to be. Aren't we all held captive by something?

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:




> I see things are as usual.  well I am back and no I was not held
> captive.  Although the way I feel being captive would be a nice place
> to be.  Aren't we all held captive by something?

Many times while under the stress of working to pay the rent, also
during those times when I had no work at all, I thought many times
that I wouldn't mind being confined for 6 months in a prison work camp
- the outdoors type, minimum security, non-dangerous fellow inmates, a
chance to work out and read, learn a few things. You know, one of
those federal type prisons, the country club type prisons we read
about in the papers. But the reality is, they don't exist. If they
did exist, people living with the combination of lots of money and
lots of mental problems would be lined up at the gates, pushing and
shoving to get to the front of the line, with me and others too poor
to afford it not allowed in the line at all. Same goes for mental
institutions. I remember when I lived in Hollywood there were guys
who'd check into Camarillo State Hospital for observation - usually
either a month or 100 days - and most of them loved it - the lack of
stress and freedom from the grind. Today if you check into a mental
institution it's going to be a prison, except instead of bars on your
cell and cement on the floor you get a door with a little window and a
cell with cold vinyl padding.

There is no way out, not even after you die - we're all coming back
and there's nothing we can do about it.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I AM NOT COMING BACK! If I got to come back I am taking everyone with
me.
Now - do people come back immediately? Or is there a waiting line.
Plus more people being born than dying. Sounds like a surplus
situation.

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:




> I AM NOT COMING BACK!  If I got to come back I am taking everyone with
> me.
> Now - do people come back immediately? Or is there a waiting line.
> Plus more people being born than dying.  Sounds like a surplus
> situation.

I don't believe we come back. We do not return. We never leave.
Even now as you live the life of Ollie you are every living soul who
ever lived, except our brains are not strong enough to handle more
than one identity at a time. The very minute Ollie dies he becomes
someone else. Someone else he's been all along but couldn't know it
because his brain was not strong enough to handle more than one
identity. Dig?

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

So multiple personality disorders are using more of their brains?
Cool. Perhaps the world is a personality disorder. We are all in the
same brain. The big brain. I have a headache.

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:



> So multiple personality disorders are using more of their brains?
> Cool.  Perhaps the world is a personality disorder.  We are all in the
> same brain.  The big brain.  I have a headache.

Yes, the multi personality disorder people have their fingers on the
pulse of life, no doubt about it. They are more alive than you or
me. Sometimes they become too alive and lose control. They go nuts
and get locked up. There, in a padded cell for the rest of their
lives the multiple personalities begin to fade away revealing the one
true personality behind the versatility parade, a lonely loser lost in
the loco loony johnny come lately night.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Has multiple personalities and they all suck.

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:




> Has multiple personalities and they all suck.

Funny one. That's bad, really bad - to have multiple personalities
and they all suck. God, what a loser that person would be. Let's
face it, the multiple personality disorder claims all began as a way
of escaping the death penalty. "You can't kill ME, I'm not the one
who did it, it was personality #42. Yeah, that's the guy you want.
Now, if we can only hunt him down and separate him from the innocent
parties, such as myself, ok, in that case I'm all for executing the
sick fuck. But I'm telling you, it wasn't me."

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:



> Has multiple personalities and they all suck.

You write good jokes, Ollie - and you know it. Some of your stuff
is worth selling - or stealing. The one above for instance. I see it
as, "My shrink told me I had multiple personalities. I said, "So
that's the problem then, multiple personalities?", and he said, "No,
the problem is not that you have multiple personalities, the problem
is that they all suck."

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I have been selling them. To LCK. I use the name "Johnny
Fuckerfaster" when submitting them. I have made 23 dollars so far.

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:



> I have been selling them.  To LCK.  I use the name "Johnny
> Fuckerfaster" when submitting them.  I have made 23 dollars so far.

I have been selling jokes to LCK for years, but it had to stop
because he never gave me the credit I deserved. A year ago I
purposely started making my jokes worse, knowing he was on auto pilot
and would notice the drop off in quality. He used my purposely bad
jokes on his show and the ratings went up. The worse I made the jokes
the more successful LCK became. Finally I stopped dealing with him
totally. I am currently selling my jokes to Skyving who is anxious to
whip LCKs ass in or out of the ring.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Of all the posters on the old ACS LCK was the most boring. He was all
business. He was going places. Now rock stars kiss his ass. I feel
in some way I helped make him what he is today. A complete asshole

[Gus]

<OllieN...@aol.com> wrote in message
news:f919ff67-6e3b-4ca3...@e13g2000yqp.googlegroups.com...

>Of all the posters on the old ACS LCK was the most boring. He was all
>business. He was going places. Now rock stars kiss his ass. I feel
>in some way I helped make him what he is today. A complete asshole

OMG
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEtAfAa67TY

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:




> Of all the posters on the old ACS LCK was the most boring.  He was all
> business.  He was going places.  Now rock stars kiss his ass.  I feel
> in some way I helped make him what he is today.  A complete asshole

I think the people who turned to him as final judge for every
standup comedy verdict were bigger assholes than he was. In fact, I'm
not sure the guy was an asshole really. He wrote me a few letters.
He seemed sincerely to not understand why I was "attacking" him. We
went back and forth a while and the communication stopped. You know
the deal, everyone who used that group had their own reasons. I
really enjoyed it when it was at it's peak for me. See, it might have
been at it's peak for others before we showed up. Same as with me in
Hollywood. For me in 1968 when I moved there it was great - old and
worn down, some places more cockroach infested than others, but still
very inexpensive and quite nice in my opinion. To others who had
lived there 10 or 20 years before it now looked like a ghetto. It
didn't look like a ghetto to me until whole families of poor people
started moving in. Anyway, I am no big fan of LCK, but I think it was
his purported supporters who used his every word to validate their own
feelings on certain standup issues that make made me even more sick.

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

"Gus" wrote:



> OMGhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEtAfAa67TY



Welcome back, GUS. Now please tell us where you've been. And be
honest.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I dont think he's any more of an asshole than the rest of us. He is
actually like a loser who hit the lottery. He played everyday and
finnally won. He did whatever it took. He honed his act, mediocre as
it is.

[Gus]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:6364c61f-e4f0-435a...@z10g2000yqd.googlegroups.com...

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:



> I dont think he's any more of an asshole than the rest of us.  He is
> actually like a loser who hit the lottery.  He played everyday and
> finnally won. He did whatever it took.  He honed his act, mediocre as
> it is.

He saved this newsgroup. Look what happened when he left. Panic
set in. "What now?", we asked. We branched out, seeking solace in
Bozo and other groups into which the mad clown posts - and guess
what? - we now have more people posting here than in a very long time
- and we have only one person to thank for that - Gus/Somebody, or
Somebody/Gus, depending on how one looks at it. Thanks Gus.

TJ

[Gus]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:3f639a67-b1ea-4103...@y5g2000yqy.googlegroups.com...

---

In Rectify, Daniel says you seek solace from the touch of those around-- you
wherever you can find it... even when you are in prison. (especially when
you are in prison 19 years.)

[Tommy Joe]

"Gus" wrote:



> In Rectify, Daniel says you seek solace from the touch of those around-- you
> wherever you can find it...  even when you are in prison.  (especially when
> you are in prison 19 years.)

I don't need Daniel, whoever the fuck he is, to tell me that. We
all do the best we can in whatever surrounding we're stuck in, like
solitary confinent for so long a time that a cockroach becomes your
best friend, and the sound of water dripping through the cold concrete
walls reminds you of the sun showers of your youth.

TJ

[unknown]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:d30f290a-949f-40c9...@r3g2000yqe.googlegroups.com...

----

*hug*

Do you have an Flannery O'Connor I can borrow?

[Tommy Joe]

"unknown" wrote:



> Do you have an Flannery O'Connor I can borrow?

I'll take that as a compliment. I'm not a big reader but have
given it a try on occasion - books I'm talking about, not newspapers.
I read something from the paper every day, only stuff I find
interesting or entertaining. But even though I'm not much of a
reader, I have given it a whirl on occasion. A few years back I went
on such a kick, going to the library and getting a book of short
stories by a guy named Harry Crews and also Flannery O'Connor. It's
like watching a movie and liking it but not every last scene, that's
the way books or even short stories are for me. I guess I'm
impatient. But I enjoyed O'Connor's stuff and also some of Crews'
stuff, so I have to take your comment as a compliment. Thank you.

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

"unknown" wrote:



> Do you have an Flannery O'Connor I can borrow?

Comment #2 from me regarding reading. Another time I got on a
reading kick I got into short stories by foreign authors. It's
interesting that I enjoyed those authors more. I believe I know why.
I believe, sincerely, it's the translation. I speak only English so
can't say I've ever read a foreign book in it's own tongue. But I
know that for a translation to be pure the translator can't take great
liberties, they have to show some restraint. I'm assuming that, I
don't really know it. But if it's true, I believe it's the reason I
enjoyed those foreign short story guys so much. Not to take anything
away from them - after all they did write the stuff. But I think in
translating from one language to another a certain simplicity is
required, often the same adjective being used in the same sentence
rather a bunch of flowery stuff. I think the translation is what made
me like those foreign short story guys.

TJ

[Gus]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:fb62943d-0b5a-43c8...@g9g2000yqh.googlegroups.com...

I found the very short story "A good man is hard to find" online.
Interesting.

Does the grandmother actually change at the end?

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On May 22, 12:38 am, "Gus" <gus.over...@geemail.com> wrote:
> "Tommy Joe" <j...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

A hard man is good to find - Faggot

[Tommy Joe]

"Gus" wrote:



> I found the very short story "A good man is hard to find" online.
> Interesting.
>
> Does the grandmother actually change at the end?

I don't know that story. As I said, I'm not much of a reader. I
am a scanner. Even movies I put at the top of my list, there may be
parts I don't like. I'm not sure I like anything beginning to end.
Some things come close. But as a rule even the stuff I've read that I
really liked I can't remember word for word or even well enough to
retell it. I know it would cost more, but I'm for a pure ala carte
system of buying things. Like for instance, instead of the whole
book, you can send away for chapter 5, paragraphs 3 through 7 or
whatever. A Good Man is Hard to Find - sounds like a movie, something
Mae West might be in - it has that ring. I suppose I could look it up
but I'm too lazy. Now a good man will be hard to find once again as
my laziness propels me toward not searching for the book.

TJ

[Gus]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:b3fc16b9-e597-4a5a...@dk8g2000vbb.googlegroups.com...

It's a short story, only 12 pages. I like short stories, not a lot of
filler.

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:



> A hard man is good to find - Faggot

Ollie, I'd love to take you out to see the new Liberace movie. Are
you up for it?

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

"Gus" wrote:



> It's a short story, only 12 pages.  I like short stories, not a lot of
> filler.

Absolutely, the shorter the better. When I was a teenager I had a
book called Short Shorts, which was filled with stories that were
mostly one page or even less in length. Some were more like
parables. But the point remains I asked you a question about the
short story. I assumed it was a short story. I was wondering who
wrote it and why you mentioned it as if you assumed I'd read it too.

I need to know,

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

Closeted gays making a movie about a flaming gay that never came out
of the closet. Whats in your closet?

[Gus]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:7e4fd181-f67f-4789...@n11g2000yqe.googlegroups.com...

That is funny...

NPR had a review today and Terry Gross talked to Michael Douglas a couple
days ago about it. In the movie, he sounds oddly like Michael Douglas doing
a Liberace impression, but it kinda works. I have no interest in seeing
Liberace, but to be honest the movie sounds interesting. Apparently Matt
Damon sucks the fuck out of Michael Douglas and then he returns the favor
for 69 minutes. From the NPR review, that seems to be mostly what the movie
is. BJs punctuated with an occasionally series of reach-arounds. I think
Ollie will enjoy it.

[Gus]

"Tommy Joe" <jo...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

news:ab2e617b-bd28-4525...@s6g2000yqs.googlegroups.com...

---

I'm not sure we are on a need to know basis but, as I said before: Flannery
O'Connor. You should check out Rectify, it's on par with Goodbye Solo.
Rectify is written and created by Ray McKinnon (not sure who he is but
apparently famous and a good bloke.) Anyway, Rectify is like BB in that the
writing and acting and cinematography are tight. You will probably enjoy
the coffee ground scene.

Don't listen to Ollie, "A Hard Man is Good to Find" was the porn version and
I would not recommend it. That adaptation loses a lot of the nuance of the
original short story.
http://pegasus.cc.ucf.edu/~surette/goodman.html

[OllieN...@aol.com]

On May 24, 12:44 am, "Gus" <gus.over...@geemail.com> wrote:
> "Tommy Joe" <j...@bellsouth.net> wrote in message

The title song is "The Rusty Trombone" as performed by Gus and Somebody

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:



> Closeted gays making a movie about a flaming gay that never came out
> of the closet.  Whats in your closet?

Liberace coming out of the closet - what a joke. Every person I
knew in the early 60s when I was a teenager just assumed he was gay.
How could anyone look at Liberace and not think he's gay. A guy like
him coming out of the closet and admitting he's guy is like waking up
to take a sleeping pill, or a 5 foot 5 inch guy who weighs 600 pounds
openly declaring on tv that he "needs to lose some weight."

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

"Gus" wrote:





> NPR had a review today and Terry Gross talked to Michael Douglas a couple
> days ago about it.  In the movie, he sounds oddly like Michael Douglas doing
> a Liberace impression, but it kinda works.  I have no interest in seeing
> Liberace, but to be honest the movie sounds interesting.  Apparently Matt
> Damon sucks the fuck out of Michael Douglas and then he returns the favor
> for 69 minutes.  From the NPR review, that seems to be mostly what the movie
> is.  BJs punctuated with an occasionally series of reach-arounds.   I think
> Ollie will enjoy it.

I don't like biography movies, especially about people who are
still alive or only recently dead. I didn't like Liberace's grand
piano shtick, but he actually had a pleasant voice for ballads. I
heard him singing a song at the end of a movie with the credits
rolling. I thought, "That guy has a pretty nice voice, I wonder who
it is." Turns out it was Liberace. But a movie about the guy? Come
on, that's stupid. What are they going to tell anyone they don't
already know? That's all we need, another biography movie for kids to
watch and then tell us all about it like we're hearing it for the
first time. I had a kid in the cab after the movie Ray came out
telling me all about Ray Charles and how great his music was and how I
should give it a try. When I told the kid I know all about Ray
Charles and have heard him do all kinds of music, he just ignored me,
going on and on about Ray and how much I ought to get to learn more
about Ray, just like the kid himself. Biography movies make me sick.
I might catch this movie one day when it makes it to tv and I land on
it during a channel surfing episode (if I'm still alive by the time it
makes it to tv). By the way, I went to a surgeon after I learned of
the Liberace movie coming out and asked the surgeon if he could
sculpture my balls into the shape of a candelabra. He did it. I have
a huge dick as always, but now below a hanging candelabra with small
holes carved in to accept small lights of varying colors to dazzle the
eyes of those lucky enough to suck my humongous righteous dick.

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:




> The title song is "The Rusty Trombone" as performed by Gus and Somebody

...........followed by "The Fluffy Flute of Faggotry" as
performed by the Ollie/Joseph Wind Ensemble.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I am on the grid here in Tahiti. The internet is everywhere. Going
to feed the sharks in the morning. This may be the last you hear of
me.

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:



> I am on the grid here in Tahiti.  The internet is everywhere.  Going
> to feed the sharks in the morning.  This may be the last you hear of
> me.

The only thing I care about are the turds. How are you turds?
Hard? Do they come out clean? How do they compare with Chi-town
turds? I need to know as I am conducting an experiment on the subject
and don't want any false information. I know I can count on you for
the truth. Lay it on me daddy, lay it on me now.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

The turds are good but not great. No Chicago style food here. French
food not inductive to big turds. But nonetheless they are good. If I
can keep from ever going home my shit life will be great.

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:




> I am on the grid here in Tahiti.  The internet is everywhere.  Going
> to feed the sharks in the morning.  This may be the last you hear of
> me.

I wonder what the sharks think of Chicago style turds. Are you a
bigger target than the average person in the water? Can they detect
your Chi-town turds even though have not yet emerged from your
assholes. Feed the sharks, funny. Sounds like a good idea for a
Paupers Grave that takes up no space. Just take those corpses (of
which mine will be one because I'm not paying for any goddamn burial
or service), and toss them into the water and watch the big
prehistoric garbage disposals leap from the drink mouths agape,
swallowing whatever's tossed in whole.

TJ

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:



> The turds are good but not great.  No Chicago style food here.  French
> food not inductive to big turds.  But nonetheless they are good.  If I
> can keep from ever going home my shit life will be great.

The "away from home" theory was mine from the start. Please give me
some credit. You might even be able to fool your turds without
actually leaving home. Maybe just packing a suitcase and rushing
around ala OJ Simpson through the airport is enough to fool your turds
into thinking they're taking a trip. Oh, they're tripping alright,
but they're not taking a trip at all. This bit of chicanery works,
but not consistently over a long period of time. You can't fool your
turds forever - they have a sixth sense, a deep knowledge that extends
far beyond that of our brains.

TJ

[OllieN...@aol.com]

I have shit for brains so it may work

[Tommy Joe]

OllieNort wrote:



> I have shit for brains so it may work

It has worked, you said so yourself. I know you will always have a
fondness for Chicago because that is the town in which you first
discovered that being away from home was related to the wonderful
business trip shits you were taking. So please continue to call your
magnificent shits Chicago style shits even if you're in Honolulu when
you take one. No disrespect for Chi-town from me, not ever. Another
theory about good shits on the road involves the hotel style of
living. You know right off the bat most of the toilets are superior
with great flushing capacity. So automatically you're more relaxed,
not worried about whether the turd is going to flush all the way or
not. Plus, if your turd is not perfect and leaves a stain on the
porcelain, the water flow is so strong that even two shit sessions
later the stains will be worked off with additional flushing. This
ease of mind contributes greatly to good shitting. Mr Shit told me
this and told me to pass it on to you.

TJ