Ghazal: “jahaan Gharq hiraas-e-fazaa-e-taar meN hai"

Irfan Abid

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Mar 19, 2021, 11:53:34 PM3/19/21

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aadaab, dosto!

abhii haal hii me Nek diigar mehfil meN ek Ghazal dekhii thii jis kii zamiin mujhe pasand aayii. is zamiin meN ek Ghazal pesh hai. mulaahiza farmaaiye aur apnii raae se navaaziye.

Ghazal

jahaan Gharq hiraas-e-fazaa-e-taar meN hai
har ik charaaGh havaaoN ke iKhtiyaar meN hai

balaayeN ghoom rahii haiN zameeN ke gird aise
zameen jaise musalsal Khud ik madaar meN hai

jo kaarvaaN se maiN bichhRaa to mujh ko ilm huaa
nishaan-e-manzil-e-maqsuud rahguzaar meN hai

koii kisii kii madad be.Gharaz nahiiN kartaa
Khayaal-e-suud-o-ziyaaN bhii to kaar-o-baar meN hai

diloN kaa farq tasaadum se Khaak kam hogaa
ki hal to aise masaail kaa sirf pyaar meN hai

gire bazor to patthar ko kaaT de paanii
misaal azm-o-jasaarat kii aabshaar meN hai

khaRaa hai raah meN phir zulm-o-jabr kaa daryaa
zamaana phir kisii Moosa ke intizaar meN hai

kahegaa hashr meN apnaa fasaana ai :Abid:
yih begunaah kaa KhuuN jo sutuun-e-daar meN hai

niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:

Naseer

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Mar 20, 2021, 9:59:20 AM3/20/21

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Irfan SaaHib, aadaab 3arz hai.

aap ne "nek diigar maHfil" se apnii baat kaa aaGhaaz kiyaa hai to mere zihn meN aayaa kih shaayad ko'ii duusrii maHfil nek logoN kii hai aur idhar sab ke sab gunaah-gaar haiN!:-)

aap kii Ghazal paRhii aur bahut pasand aa'ii. Hasb-i-ma3muul aap kii kaavish ko siyaasii nuqtah-i-nigaa se dekhaa jaa saktaa hai. sach to yih hai kih is maujuudah maaHaul meN siyaasii Haalaat se kaun duur rah saktaa hai?

Ghazal kaa matla3 bahut xuub hai. faurii taur par mujhe "havaa" aur "Covid 19" ke ta3alluq kaa iHsaas hu'aa. shaayad aap isii mauzuu3 ko chheR rahe haiN.

shi3r 2. kyaa zamiin balaa'oN kii lapeT meN aane se pahle suuraj ke ird-gird apne madaar meN musalsal ghuum nahiiN rahii?

shi3r 3. shaayad mujhe yih shi3r Thiik tarH samajh meN nah aayaa ho. lekin jab aap kaarvaaN se bichhaR ga'e aur aap ko iHsaas hu'aa kih aap kii manzil-i-maqsuud usii raah par hai to zaahir hai kih kaarvaaN saHiiH simt meN jaa rahaa thaa. kyaa aap yih kah rahe haiN kih aap se ek bahut baRii Ghalatii sar-zad ho ga'ii hai kih aap kaarvaaN se alag ho ga'e haiN?

shi3r 4. bahut xuub Irfan SaaHib. magar aap to bahut se logoN kii madad karte haiN aur vuh bhii ba-Ghair naf3 aur nuqsaan ko madd-i-nazar rakhte hu'e! balkih maiN to kahuuN gaa kih aap kii madad be-laus hai!

shi3r 5. ab hu'ii nah baat! pyaar hii masaa'il kaa Hal hai. bahut xuub!

shi3r 6. bahut achchhaa shi3r hai!

shi3r 7 Here I presume "daryaa" has the meaning of "sea"?

shi3r 8 kahegaa hashr meN apnaa fasaana ai :Abid:

yih begunaah kaa KhuuN jo sutuun-e-daar meN hai

aap ke maqt'e3 meN kyaa "yih", "fasaanah" se munsalik hai? Or should "yih" be "is". I am sorry it is quite possible I am not reading the shi3r correctly.

Your Ghazal has elements of physics (difference in air pressure for the airlflow), Physics/astronomy when you talk about "calamaties" revolving in an orbit around the earth; geography (erosion of rocks by water) along with faith (yaum-i-Hashr), faith and miracles (Moses and the parting of the sea), business (loss and gain) and human qualities of hate and love! What more can one wish in a modern Ghazal!

Naseer

Irfan Abid

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Mar 20, 2021, 11:24:09 PM3/20/21

to

On Saturday, March 20, 2021 at 9:59:20 AM UTC-4, Naseer wrote:
> On Saturday, 20 March 2021 at 03:53:34 UTC, Irfan Abid wrote:
> > aadaab, dosto!
> >
> > abhii haal hii me Nek diigar mehfil meN ek Ghazal dekhii thii jis kii zamiin mujhe pasand aayii. is zamiin meN ek Ghazal pesh hai. mulaahiza farmaaiye aur apnii raae se navaaziye.
> >
> > Ghazal
> >
> > jahaan Gharq hiraas-e-fazaa-e-taar meN hai
> > har ik charaaGh havaaoN ke iKhtiyaar meN hai
> >
> > balaayeN ghoom rahii haiN zameeN ke gird aise
> > zameen jaise musalsal Khud ik madaar meN hai
> >
> > jo kaarvaaN se maiN bichhRaa to mujh ko ilm huaa
> > nishaan-e-manzil-e-maqsuud rahguzaar meN hai
> >
> > koii kisii kii madad be.Gharaz nahiiN kartaa
> > Khayaal-e-suud-o-ziyaaN bhii to kaar-o-baar meN hai
> >
> > diloN kaa farq tasaadum se Khaak kam hogaa
> > ki hal to aise masaail kaa sirf pyaar meN hai
> >
> > gire bazor to patthar ko kaaT de paanii
> > misaal azm-o-jasaarat kii aabshaar meN hai
> >
> > khaRaa hai raah meN phir zulm-o-jabr kaa daryaa
> > zamaana phir kisii Moosa ke intizaar meN hai
> >
> > kahegaa hashr meN apnaa fasaana ai :Abid:
> > yih begunaah kaa KhuuN jo sutuun-e-daar meN hai
> >
> > niyaazmand,
> > Irfan :Abid:
> Irfan SaaHib, aadaab 3arz hai.
>

Naseer sb, aadaab arz hai!

> aap ne "nek diigar maHfil" se apnii baat kaa aaGhaaz kiyaa hai to mere zihn meN aayaa kih shaayad ko'ii duusrii maHfil nek logoN kii hai aur idhar sab ke sab gunaah-gaar haiN!:-)
>

janaab, ye kaarnaama meraa nahiiN, MS Word ka hai. aur sunaa hai software jhuuT nahiiN boltaa!  mazaaq bar taraf, maiN apne Khutuut pehle MS Word meN tehriir kartaa huuN aur na jaane kyoN Word har martaba “meN ek” ko “me Nek” kar detaa hai. maiN tas.hiih kar detaa huuN lekin is martaba nahii kar sakaa.

> aap kii Ghazal paRhii aur bahut pasand aa'ii. Hasb-i-ma3muul aap kii kaavish ko siyaasii nuqtah-i-nigaa se dekhaa jaa saktaa hai. sach to yih hai kih is maujuudah maaHaul meN siyaasii Haalaat se kaun duur rah saktaa hai?
>

pasandiidagii kaa bahut bahut shukriya! aap ne bajaa farmaayaa. kuchh arsa se gird-o-pesh ke samaajii aur siyaasii haalaat is qadar tashviishnaak haiN ki in se mutaassir na honaa kam az kam mere liye naamumkin hai. zaahir hai zihn kii kaifiyat suKhan meN bhii dar aatii hai.

> Ghazal kaa matla3 bahut xuub hai. faurii taur par mujhe "havaa" aur "Covid 19" ke ta3alluq kaa iHsaas hu'aa. shaayad aap isii mauzuu3 ko chheR rahe haiN.
>

yahaaN dar asl “fazaa-e-taar” se muraad vuh maayuus.kun maahaul hai jis meN maiN Khud ko paataa huuN, “charaaGh” se muraad is maahaul kaa toR hai aur “havaaoN” se muraad haiN powers that be.

> shi3r 2. kyaa zamiin balaa'oN kii lapeT meN aane se pahle suuraj ke ird-gird apne madaar meN musalsal ghuum nahiiN rahii?
>

jii haaN, maiN ne yahi arz kiya hai ki balaayeN zamiin ke atraaf Thiik aise ghoom rahii haiN jaise zamiin apne madaar meN (suuraj ke gird) ghoom rahii hai.

> shi3r 3. shaayad mujhe yih shi3r Thiik tarH samajh meN nah aayaa ho. lekin jab aap kaarvaaN se bichhaR ga'e aur aap ko iHsaas hu'aa kih aap kii manzil-i-maqsuud usii raah par hai to zaahir hai kih kaarvaaN saHiiH simt meN jaa rahaa thaa. kyaa aap yih kah rahe haiN kih aap se ek bahut baRii Ghalatii sar-zad ho ga'ii hai kih aap kaarvaaN se alag ho ga'e haiN?
>

yahaaN yih kehnaa chaah rahaa huuN ki jab tak kaarvaaN ke saath thaa, maiN sirf us kii taqliid kar rahaa thaa. maiN ne yih sochne kii zihmat nahiiN kii manzil ka nishaan kahaaN hai. lekin jab maiN tanhaa rah gayaa to mujhe Khud manzil ke nishaan kii talaash karnii paRii aur tab mujhe maaluum huaa ki vuh raah meN hai.

> shi3r 4. bahut xuub Irfan SaaHib. magar aap to bahut se logoN kii madad karte haiN aur vuh bhii ba-Ghair naf3 aur nuqsaan ko madd-i-nazar rakhte hu'e! balkih maiN to kahuuN gaa kih aap kii madad be-laus hai!
>

yih aap kii zarra.navaazii hai varna maiN kis qaabil huuN. maiN Khud ko un meN shumaar nahiiN kartaa, lekin yih sach hai ki dunyaa meN aise bahut se log haiN jo auroN kii belaus madad karte haiN. lekin ziyadatar log kuchh bhalaa karne ke baad us ka silaa bhii chaahte haiN. yih she’r unhiiN kii baabat hai.

> shi3r 5. ab hu'ii nah baat! pyaar hii masaa'il kaa Hal hai. bahut xuub!
>

navaazish, janaab!

> shi3r 6. bahut achchhaa shi3r hai!
>

shukriya!

> shi3r 7 Here I presume "daryaa" has the meaning of "sea"?
>

Actually I meant “river.” I know that in the original story, which I have referred to here, Hazrat Moosa AS parted a sea. But it shouldn’t matter. All I am trying to say is that there is a similar obstacle in the way.

> shi3r 8 kahegaa hashr meN apnaa fasaana ai :Abid:
> yih begunaah kaa KhuuN jo sutuun-e-daar meN hai
> aap ke maqt'e3 meN kyaa "yih", "fasaanah" se munsalik hai? Or should "yih" be "is". I am sorry it is quite possible I am not reading the shi3r correctly.
>

“yih” “Khuun” se munsalik hai. nasr meN kaheN to ‘ye jo begunaah kaa Khuun sutuun-e-daar meN hai, hashr meN apnaa fasaana kahegaa.’

> Your Ghazal has elements of physics (difference in air pressure for the airlflow), Physics/astronomy when you talk about "calamaties" revolving in an orbit around the earth; geography (erosion of rocks by water) along with faith (yaum-i-Hashr), faith and miracles (Moses and the parting of the sea), business (loss and gain) and human qualities of hate and love! What more can one wish in a modern Ghazal!
>
> Naseer

That’s a big compliment, sir! Thanks a bunch for your kind attention and the detailed response. Much appreciated.

niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:

Raj Kumar

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Mar 23, 2021, 5:06:23 PM3/23/21

to

On Friday, March 19, 2021 at 8:53:34 PM UTC-7, Irfan Abid wrote:
> aadaab, dosto!
>

> abhii haal hii meN ek diigar mehfil meN ek Ghazal dekhii thii jis kii zamiin mujhe pasand aayii. is zamiin meN ek Ghazal pesh hai. mulaahiza farmaaiye aur apnii raae se navaaziye.

***janaab Irfan sahib:

aap ki Ghazal nazar-navaaz hu'ii, ise paRhaa aur is ka Hazz uThaaya. Ghazal har liHaaz se qubuul-e-Khaatir Thahrii aur qaabil-e-ta'areef saabit hu'ii. is kaamyaab kaavish par aap ko bahut bahut mubaarak-baad!

yuuN to Ghazal ke sabhi ash'aar pasaNd aaye haiN magar mundaraja-zail ash'aar Khusuusi taur se jii ko bhaaye haiN:***

> jahaan Gharq hiraas-e-fazaa-e-taar meN hai
> har ik charaaGh havaaoN ke iKhtiyaar meN hai
>

> jo kaarvaaN se maiN bichhRaa to mujh ko ilm huaa
> nishaan-e-manzil-e-maqsuud rahguzaar meN hai
>

> diloN kaa farq tasaadum se Khaak kam hogaa
> ki hal to aise masaail kaa sirf pyaar meN hai
>
> gire bazor to patthar ko kaaT de paanii
> misaal azm-o-jasaarat kii aabshaar meN hai
>
> khaRaa hai raah meN phir zulm-o-jabr kaa daryaa
> zamaana phir kisii Moosa ke intizaar meN hai

***in ash'aar par aap ko Khusuusi mubaarak-baad!***

>
> kahegaa hashr meN apnaa fasaana ai :Abid:
> yih begunaah kaa KhuuN jo sutuun-e-daar meN hai
>

***mu'aaf keejiye, aap ke maqt'e par aek savaal uThtaa hai --- voh yeh k be-gunaah ka Khuun sutuun-e-dar "par" to ho sakta hai, sutuun-e-daar "meN" kaise ho sakta hai? radeef ki majbuuri bar-taraf, aap ki yeh tarkeeb Khaaksaar ko mauzuuN nahiiN lag rahi. is zimn meN, aap ka kyaa Khayaal hai?

niyaaz-maNd, Raj Kumar***

Irfan Abid

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Mar 24, 2021, 11:35:45 PM3/24/21

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muhtaram RK sb, aadaab arz hai!

Ghazal par nigaah-e-karam aur izhaar-e-pasandiidagii kaa shukriya! aur chand ash'aar par Khaas daad kaa Khaas shukriya! :)

maqta' par aap kaa savaal jaaiz hai. maiN ne is riaayat se kaam liyaa hai ki Khuun kisii sat'h par girne par us meN jazb bhii hotaa hai.

niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:

Zoya

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Mar 25, 2021, 11:11:18 PM3/25/21

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Irfan sahib,

aadaab,

aap kii is ghazal ko maiN ab tak kaii baar paRh chukii huuN, aur dil hii dil meN daad bhii de chukii huuN. aaj kal idhar udhar kuChh duusre threads meN masruuf thii, so yahaaN aate aate mujhe zaraa der ho gayii.

ab aap apne Khaas andaaz meN likhii huii is hasb-e-Haal aur pur_asar ghazal par merii jaanib se dilii daad qubuul kiijiye. aur jaisaa aap ne bhii kahaa, zamiin vaqe'ii dilkash hai.
ik do savaal jo maiN aap se puuChhne vaalii thii, un kaa javaab aap pehle hii de chuke haiN. shukriyah.

aaKhir meN yeh kehnaa chahtii huuN k 'sutuun-e-daar' kii tarkiib ke baare meN maiN bhii soch rahii thii. aap ne RK sahib ko is kaa javaab de diya hai, but to be honest, I have not bought it fully. I hope he has. :)

Thank you.

_________Zoya

Irfan Abid

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Mar 26, 2021, 2:47:50 PM3/26/21

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Zoya sahiba, aadaab!

aap kii daad mere liye hamesha behad Khushii kaa baais hotii hai aur is baar bhii hai. bahut bahut shukriya!

I honor your reservation about the maqta. The beauty of the world of poetry is that it's a democratic one. The reader has every right to differ from the writer. :)

niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:

Afzal A. Khan

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Mar 26, 2021, 2:52:30 PM3/26/21

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'Irfan Saheb,

Aapki ghazal KHoob hai. Bahut pasaNd aayee.

Meri jaanib se daad qubool farmaaiyye

****************

Ek do baateN 'arz karni haiN.......

1. In the very first misra', what exactly is meant by
the word "taar" ?

2. In the penultimate sher, the words "khaRa hona"
with reference to "darya" seem a little odd.
Usually, one uses words like "Haail hona" etc.

3. In the last misra' : "KHoon" 'sutoon' pe nazar
aa sakta hai. "MeN' conveys a sense of "something
inside". It is true, though, that "pe" would not
suit the "zameen" of this ghazal.

****************

In the penultimate sher, the reference to Hazrat Moosa
(A) is absolutely appropriate. Let us hope and pray
that the old adage of "Har Fir'aune ra Moosa" will
come true sooner rather than later.

Ek sher men aap ne "kaarobaar" ka zikr kiya hai.

Is par mujhe ek kaafi puraani film ke ek gaane ka ek sher
yaad aa gaya. {Perhaps I have mentioned it in ALUP earlier
also.}

Unfortunately, that ghazal (containing the sher) was
deleted from the film. The film, I think, was "The
Burning Train", released in 1980. The ghazal was sung by
Asha Bhosle.

And the sher in question is as under :

Na woh hamaare huwe, aur na hum rahe apne
MoHabbatoN ka 'ajab kaarobaar hum ne kiya

****************

The lyricist in respect of this ghazal was SaaHir
Ludhiyaanvi. And music was composed by R. D. Burman.

Quite possibly, the ghazal might have been written much
earlier, and was used later for the film. Also, I suspect
that he ghazal might have been sort of autobiographical.

Reportedly, SaaHir was in love with Sudha Malhotra, a Punjabi
lady who was a playback singer, but is little remembered
today, due to the fact that she was overshadowed by
singers like the Mangeshkar sisters......

Sudha Malhotra was born in 1936 and is still with us.

SaaHir, born in 1921, passed away in October 1980.

I am sure our friends will definitely appreciate the entire
ghazal, though only four ash'aar were used in the song :

Kisi ke wa'de pe kyoN ae'tibaar hum ne kiya
Na aane waaloN ka kyoN intezaar hum ne kiya

Na woh hamaare huwe, aur na hum rahe apne
MoHabbatoN ka 'ajab kaarobaar hum ne kiya

Woh khe khel rahe the, woh khel khel chuke
KHata hamaari thi, kyoN un se pyaar hum ne kiya

BichhaR ke un se na jab dil kisi taraH badla
Sharab'KHaane ka ruKH iKHtiyaar hum ne kiya

Afzal

Irfan Abid

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Mar 27, 2021, 12:49:22 PM3/27/21

to

Muhtaram Afzal sb, aadaab arz hai!

Aap kii daad mere liye baais-e-sad.iftiKhaar hai. bahut bahut shukriya!

>
> ****************
>
>
> Ek do baateN 'arz karni haiN.......
>
>
> 1. In the very first misra', what exactly is meant by
> the word "taar" ?
>

“taar” means black/dark. You may have seen it with “shab” as in “shab-e-taar.”

> 2. In the penultimate sher, the words "khaRa hona"
> with reference to "darya" seem a little odd.
> Usually, one uses words like "Haail hona" etc.
>

True. Actually I have tried to personify “daryaa” here such that it looks like someone standing in and blocking your way.

> 3. In the last misra' : "KHoon" 'sutoon' pe nazar
> aa sakta hai. "MeN' conveys a sense of "something
> inside". It is true, though, that "pe" would not
> suit the "zameen" of this ghazal.
>

Agree. As I said in my reply to RK sb and Zoya sahiba, I assumed that the blood has seeped into “sutoon.” If you imagine a “sutoon” soaked in blood, “meN” might sound acceptable to you. And of course “pe” wouldn’t fit the zamiin.

>
> ****************
>
>
> In the penultimate sher, the reference to Hazrat Moosa
> (A) is absolutely appropriate. Let us hope and pray
> that the old adage of "Har Fir'aune ra Moosa" will
> come true sooner rather than later.
>

Aameen.

I do know this ghazal from “The Burning Train” movie and I do remember it being mentioned in this or some other forum once. Typical splendid poetry by Sahir and excellent composition by RD Burman. These two masters worked together in a couple movies only, the other ones being “Joshila,” “Aa Gale Lag Ja” and “Deewar.” I wish they had collaborated more. Thanks for mentioning this ghazal. Here is the link if you or others want to enjoy it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G0nEmTohd-A

>
>
>
> Afzal
>

Once again, thanks for your very kind words!

niyaazmand,
Irfan :Abid:

Zoya

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Mar 28, 2021, 12:23:23 PM3/28/21

to

On Saturday, March 27, 2021 at 11:49:22 AM UTC-5, Irfan Abid wrote:
> On Friday, March 26, 2021 at 2:52:30 PM UTC-4, Afzal A. Khan wrote:

> > > koii kisii kii madad be.Gharaz nahiiN kartaa
> > > Khayaal-e-suud-o-ziyaaN bhii to kaar-o-baar meN hai

> > Ek sher men aap ne "kaarobaar" ka zikr kiya hai.
> >
> > Is par mujhe ek kaafi puraani film ke ek gaane ka ek sher
> > yaad aa gaya. {Perhaps I have mentioned it in ALUP earlier
> > also.}
> >

> > Na woh hamaare huwe, aur na hum rahe apne
> > MoHabbatoN ka 'ajab kaarobaar hum ne kiya

> > Afzal

> Irfan :Abid:

Afzal sahib/Irfan sahib,

muhabbat ke kaar-o-baar par yeh asha'ar dekh kaer mere zehn meN bhii pehle be_saaKhtaa ik she'r aayaa thaa:

khonaa paanaa maiN kyaa jaanuuN
ishq hai, kaar-o-baar nahiiN hai!

aur phir mujhe Javed Akhtar sahib kii, taviil baHr meN likhii huii, ek musalsal ghazal yaad aa gayii. ise Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan sahib ne apnii aavaaz meN amar kar diyaa hai. I am sure you know which ghazal I am talking about, from one of my all time favorite albums, 'sangam':

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5glOG6se_eM

shahr ke dukaaN_daaro, kaar-o-baar-e-ulfat meN, suud kyaa ziyaaN kyaa hai, tum na jaan paayo ge

Regarding Sahir's ghazal in Asha Bhonsle's voice, I have also heard it previously. I believe AIR used to play it in the eighites. I know that it was purged from the movie, but for some odd reason I have an image of Reena Roy lip syncing it. I can't shake this visual, is there something to it or is it just my imagination?? Odd, as I said.

Thank you.

_________Zoya