Re: 12/25 Puns
Tim Bruening
Greg Evans wrote:
> J. A. Mc. wrote:
> > On Wed, 3 Nov 2004 06:30:51 -0500, "Frank A. Rosenbaum"
> >> "Milton J. Smuthworthy, I" <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote
> >> in
> >>> Then "Frank A. Rosenbaum" says:
> >>>> "Greg Evans" <mis...@larkbooks.com> wrote in message
> >>>> news:2unehsF...@uni-berlin.de...
> >>>>> Frank A. Rosenbaum wrote:
> >>>>>> "nemo" <ne...@naughtylust.wet> wrote in message
> >>>>>>> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> >>>>
> >>>>>>>> Why did the man take a pencil to bed?
> >>>>>>>> To draw the curtains.
> >>>>>>> If he had though himself to actually be the curtains, he
> >>>>>>> should
> >>>>>>> have pulled himself together!
> >>>>>> He did, but he draped himself over the bed. By the way, the
> >>>>>> mans
> >>>>>> name is Rod.
> >>>>> Did it comforter him to do that, or was it a result of some sort
> >>>>> of ambi-valence about his purpose in life?
> >>>> Well, Sheet, Greg, Ya gotta ask Rod. I was blind when he did it.
> >>>> Don't forget to take your pill, Oh, also don't forget your
> >>>> inhaler
> >>>> either.
> >>> Do you two have a room? I'm hearing shades of a one nightstand.
> >> No, we don't. He wanted to roller in the hay, but I told him that I
> >> wasn't pulled that way.
> >
> > You prefer feathers ... ???
>
> Not sure I'm willing to take that thought any feather.... Call it a
> draw?
Pillow: Medicine on the ground.
Billow: William on the ground.
Tim Bruening
"Milton J. Smuthworthy, I" wrote:
> Then "Frank A. Rosenbaum" says:
> >> Then "Frank A. Rosenbaum" says:
> >>>"Greg Evans" <mis...@larkbooks.com> wrote in message
> >>>>> "nemo" <ne...@naughtylust.wet> wrote in message
> >>>>>> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> >
> >>>>>>> Why did the man take a pencil to bed?
> >>>>>>> To draw the curtains.
> >>>>>> If he had though himself to actually be the curtains, he should
have
> >>>>>> pulled himself together!
> >>>>> He did, but he draped himself over the bed. By the way, the mans
name
> >>>>> is Rod.
> >>>> Did it comforter him to do that, or was it a result of some sort
of
> >>>> ambi-valence about his purpose in life?
> >>>Well, Sheet, Greg, Ya gotta ask Rod. I was blind when he did it.
Don't
> >>>forget to take your pill, Oh, also don't forget your inhaler
either.
> >> Do you two have a room? I'm hearing shades of a one nightstand.
> >
> >No, we don't. He wanted to roller in the hay, but I told him that I
wasn't
> >pulled that way.
>
> I guess he missed his window of opportunity to see the light.
Lighting: Low mass bell.
Opportunity: Tea that knocks.
Tim Bruening
"Frank A. Rosenbaum" wrote:
> "Greg Evans" <mis...@larkbooks.com> wrote in message
> news:2usr9fF...@uni-berlin.de...
> > J. A. Mc. wrote:
> >> On Wed, 3 Nov 2004 06:30:51 -0500, "Frank A. Rosenbaum"
> >>> "Milton J. Smuthworthy, I" <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote
in
> >>>> Then "Frank A. Rosenbaum" says:
> >>>>> "Greg Evans" <mis...@larkbooks.com> wrote in message
> >>>>> news:2unehsF...@uni-berlin.de...
> >>>>>> Frank A. Rosenbaum wrote:
> >>>>>>> "nemo" <ne...@naughtylust.wet> wrote in message
> >>>>>>>> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> >>>>>
> >>>>>>>>> Why did the man take a pencil to bed?
> >>>>>>>>> To draw the curtains.
> >>>>>>>> If he had though himself to actually be the curtains, he
should
> >>>>>>>> have pulled himself together!
> >>>>>>> He did, but he draped himself over the bed. By the way, the
mans
> >>>>>>> name is Rod.
> >>>>>> Did it comforter him to do that, or was it a result of some
sort
> >>>>>> of ambi-valence about his purpose in life?
> >>>>> Well, Sheet, Greg, Ya gotta ask Rod. I was blind when he did it.
> >>>>> Don't forget to take your pill, Oh, also don't forget your
inhaler
> >>>>> either.
> >>>> Do you two have a room? I'm hearing shades of a one nightstand.
> >>> No, we don't. He wanted to roller in the hay, but I told him that
I
> >>> wasn't pulled that way.
> >>
> >> You prefer feathers ... ???
> >
> > Not sure I'm willing to take that thought any feather.... Call it a
draw?
>
> If you want to feather bed, go ahead. I don't give a flock.
>
> "Birds of a flock, feather together".
Flocking: Flying male monarchs.
Oinking: Porcine male monarch.
Barking: Alcoholic male monarch, or dog male monarch, or male monarch in
jail, or a male monarch lawyer.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:426EE79A...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > Aster: A donkey jail.
> >
> > Astern: The ass of an ass.
> >
> > Astern: A donkey bird.
> >
> > Astral: Bodiless donkey.
> >
> > Astray: Wandering donkey.
>
> Ashtray: Wandering donkey with a shpeech defect caused by lung cancer.
Cancer: A metallic cylindrical knight.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:426EE7C4...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > Abride: One span.
> >
> > Aberrant: A deviant ant.
> >
> > Accede: One baby plant.
> >
> > Adamant: The first ant.
> >
> > Adhere: Here is the glue commercial.
>
> E-poxy resin: Online glue that brings you out in nasty spots.
Resin: To sin again.
Ashen: A female donkey/chicken.
Freshen: A randy female chicken.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:426F3DB4...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:421A8254...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > > Breaking: King of dancing by spinning on the ground.
> > > >
> > > > Braking: King of stopping.
> > > >
> > >
> > > . . . . or the monarch of making donkey noises.
> >
> > Donkey: Unlocks a Mafia lock.
> >
> > Angstrom: Very small guitar.
> >
> > Banditry: Tree that holds people up and robs them.
> >
> > Barring: Ring that serves beer and wine.
> >
> > Biddy: Auctionweering demon.
>
> Red Biddy: Auctionweering alcoholic.
Reddy: Communist demon.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:42523F6A...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:424D0708...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > > nemo wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > An alcoholic got so bad he started seeing huge arses sliding up
> > > and
> > > > down the
> > > > > curtains - then all of a sudden his condition D.T. rear rated!
> > > >
> > > > Do you have any proof?
> > > >
> > > Nope. No no more.
> > >
> > > As I've mentioned before, in the EEC we've abandoned the Eric Sykes
> > > Scale
> > > and we measure it instead by Alcohol % by Volume - meaning that the
> > > more you
> > > drink, the louder you get.
> >
> > Demon Rum: Drunk demon.
> >
> > DUI: Demon who drives while drunk.
> >
> DOA: A KKK member's portal and how a KKK cop's black prisoners always arrive
> at the police station!
DOD: Military demon.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
DOE: Energetic demon.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4271D766...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:426EE79A...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > Aster: A donkey jail.
> > > >
> > > > Astern: The ass of an ass.
> > > >
> > > > Astern: A donkey bird.
> > > >
> > > > Astral: Bodiless donkey.
> > > >
> > > > Astray: Wandering donkey.
> > >
> > > Ashtray: Wandering donkey with a shpeech defect caused by lung cancer.
> >
> > Cancer: A metallic cylindrical knight.
> >
> Doughnut: Rich torriodal loony.
Donut: Crazy female deer.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4271AF6D...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > Canada: Father of a can, and a friend of Panda (father of a pan).
> >
> > Ricin: Misbehaving grains.
>
> Wheat ears. When they're upset - wee tears.
Weedy: Urinating demons.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4271AF7D...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > Iraq: Internet torture device.
> >
> > Suriname: A nation of knights who are called many things.
>
> Surplice: Knight who disguises himself as a priest.
>
> (Wan ewe didn't thin cough!)
>
> Sacristy: Beverage served in a room at the back of a church where the G-d
> Squad accessories and accoutrements are kept.
>
> Chalice: Parasitic insects in a cup.
Parody: Demons who do caricatures or satire.
Tragedy: Demons in grief.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4271AFE0...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > Nelson: Son of the sound a bell makes.
> >
> > Subcontract: Legal agreement underwater.
> >
> > Toll Cookies: Favorite cookies eaten by bells.
>
> Toll Gate: Musical Turnpike.
>
> Toll Gate Toothpaste: What the gatekeeper uses.
>
> Turnpike: Rotating spear.
>
> Rotating: Helicopter propeller with bells on.
>
> That really was a cyclical pun, wazn tit?!
>
> Collectively, I'm sure you'll all agree.
Gating: Homosexual bell.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4271CA19...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > Erik D. Freeman <efr...@alumni.umbc.edu> wrote in message
> > > news:busaqc$sqv$1...@news.umbc.edu...
> > >
> > > NEWSFLASH:
> > >
> > > Michael Jackson tried killing himself Wednesday morning by
> > > jumping off his boat.
> > >
> > > The police found him last night bobbing up and down on a small buoy.
> >
> > Oh boy, star (over) Board!
>
> He was drunk from too much port!
Porting: Low income bell by the sea.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4271CBB7...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > "J. A. Mc." wrote:
> >
> > > On 05 May 2004 11:32:51 GMT, Dr Tormento <re...@togroup.com> found
> > these
> > > unused words floating about:
> > >
> > > >"Jenni Saqua" <mar...@awol.com> wrote in
> > > >news:409846f7$0$28708$d36...@news.calweb.com:
> > > >
> > > >> "J. A. Mc." wrote ...
> > > >>> On 04 May Dr Tormento originally found these
> > > >>> unused words floating about:
> > > >>>
> > > >>> >Today is National Star Wars Day.
> > > >>> >
> > > >>> >May the 4th be with you!
> > > >>>
> > > >>> Oh be wanken Obie!
> > > >>>
> > > >> Hey, he did a good jabba that one...bet ya had to chewbacca bunch
> > of
> > > >> retorts to hit that one.
> > > >
> > > > Never a darth of wit from Jeni.
> > >
> > > Vader go Jenni ...
> >
> > Have you ever been to a Maul?
>
> Yeah. And I bought a sledge jammer!
Jammer: Ocean of jelly.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4271C00B...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > Person: Price of a male kid.
> >
> > Perspirate: Price of sweat.
> >
> > Perspire: Price of the top of the church.
> >
> > Permission: Price of the entire church.
> >
> Peracleese: Price of a very tall Python comedian.
Python Comedian: Snake that tells jokes?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
"Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:4271C3E0...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>
>
> Gussie wrote:
>
> > ARRESTING OFFICER Cubicle worker who finds 9 to 5 TUTU tiring
> > CARNIVOROUS ...where I thought I parked it--and it doesn't come
when
> I
> > call
> > WINDOW What we hope to do at a casino
> > STUBBORN Genetically short
> > MONOMANIAC One who finds stereo too confusing
> > NESSELRODE Didn't wear seat belts
> > BUTTERBALL Goats' gala event
> > RUDE Attacked by a kangaroo
> > LOBOTOMY Having an underslung rear
> > SURFBOARD Tired of browsing the Web
> > PITCHMAN A sap collector
> > ACUMEN What space aliens do to blend in with earthlings
> > HUMERUS Actually, it's the one just above the funny bone
> > MOTH Green thtuff often found growing on brickth
> > CASTANET What a lady spider does to ensnare a gentleman
> spider--later she
> > eats him
> > CURRENT The fee charged by Rent-A-Mutt
> > UNIVERSE One-line poem
> > APPLE POLISHER A neat freak who owns a Mac
> > PUTREFACTION PC users group
> > STILBESTROL A pill ingested to maintain the illusion of
superiority
>
> ARSON: Arson got an A!
>
A firebug once got the petrol all over his rear end and left the
burning
building with his arson fire!
Adkins: To have more children and put them on a diet!
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
"Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:4271AF8D...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > news:3F64D428...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > Event: Ventilation system on a computer or Internet.
> > >
> >
> > Fan Club: Device for smashing same.
>
> Unless the fan is protected by Fan Mail!
You can order that stuff by sending a chain letter.
Chain Letter: Used to imprison the mail.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4155CFCC...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:4041E45F...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > Beechwood: Sandy trees.
> > > >
> > > > Box Elder: What they made gramps casket out of.
> > > >
> > > > Karl Marx Roses: First Red Roses.
> > > >
> > > > Redwood: Very tall trees much loved by environmentalists.
> > > >
> > > > Readwood: A book.
> > > >
> > > > Statice: Very high ranking flowers.
> > > >
> > > > Sycamore: Don't want another bite.
> > > >
> > > > Sycamore: What Valerie Harper said about reuniting with Mary
Tyler
> > > > Moore.
> > >
> > > Hornbeam: Wife's expression when she sees the results of her
husband
> taking
> > > Viagra!
> >
> > Hawthorne: Laughing prickly plants.
> >
> > Mulberry: A berry on which kids see all sorts of weird animals.
>
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mul
>
> The things some peep hole use their PCs for!
>
> It was also a prefabricated WW2 harbour used during the D-day landings
- and
> British, d'ya hear? BRITISH!!!
Briton: 2,000 pound inhabitant of Great Britain.
Tim Bruening
Pollywolly wrote:
> J. A. Mc. wrote:
>
> > That's what lawyers say ... "Where there's a will, there's away!"
>
> Oh bequeath
Bee that writes wills.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Buffalo Chilkat <mam...@watering.hole> wrote in message
> news:fujsrvoa1p9vaqgev...@4ax.com...
> > On Fri, 21 Nov 2003 17:51:51 GMT, "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet>
> > wrote:
> >
> > >
> > >nemo <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
> > >news:ea8vb.51685$qu.4...@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> > >>
> > >> fredm...@the.PC <fre...@webtv.net> wrote in message
> > >> news:3361f1b9.03111...@posting.google.com...
> > >> > "Sheila Dundee" <Co...@optusnetXCAPS.com.au> wrote in message
> > >> news:<3fbc2286$0$13673$afc3...@news.optusnet.com.au>...
> > >> > > Kathy wrote:
> > >> > > > "nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
> > >> > > > news:MCPub.27404$qu....@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> > >> > > >>
> > >> > > >> fredm...@the.PC ?Z <FRE...@webtv.net> wrote in message
> > >> > > >>
news:1660-3FB...@storefull-2375.public.lawson.webtv.net...
> > >> > > >>> ne...@naughtylass2.wet (nemo) wrote :
> > >> > > >>>
> > >> > > >>> Old MacDonald was dyslexic - E O I O E
> > >> > > >>> (Billy Colony)
> > >> > > >>>
> > >> > > >>> Silly burger!
> > >> > > >>>
> > >> > > >>> Nemo
> > >> > > >>>
> > >> > > >>> Silly AND stale old burger. You want flies with that ?
> > >> > > >>>
> > >> > > >> Don't tell me they've started doing Eccles Cake Burgers!
> > >> > > >>
> > >> > > > Nah, they merely signed the Maggot à laCarta.
> > >> > >
> > >> > > I larva pun like that!
> > >> >
> > >> > You'll outgrow it once you find your wings.
> > >>
> > >> Not if he drinks his ale late!
> > >>
> > >That obviously went over your heads. It would. It's the technical
term
> for
> > >wing-like and is used to describe winged insects such as queen and
drone
> > >ants!
> > >
> > Hey Mr. High and Mighty. I have a Ph.D. in that bug stuff, so blow
it
> > out your ass.
> >
> You sure it ain't a Nh.D., nick?!
>
> And I haven't had mighty yet. It's still in the pot.
Potting: Musical ceramic container.
Potting: Musical majuana.
Plotting: Musical play.
Tim Bruening
dustbird wrote:
> > > ----- For this effort, my ex-boss assigned me tree puns. ---
> > > I would like help on TREE related puns >
>
> I benin many places. I sapele play soccer in Brazil. Was he ever
limba.
> And very poplar.
> I went to Princeton, and ramin to Einstein. Zebrano! I wanted to
> introduce him to my brothers and sisters, Myrtle, Burl, Bub, Inga. My
> brother said: "Butternut." But I was satin he wood love them. By gum,
he
> did. He said "Everything is relativity!" Elm his fan. The men's room
was in
> the basement. I had tupelo.
> I had back pain. Old war wound. Purpleheart. Heard of medicine
man. Flew
> to New Guinea. Herbal cure didn't work. I was teaked off, but I padauk
the
> shaman. Pain got desperate.
> Flew to Rome. Birch into Church. Met Father John and Sister Rose.
Got
> religion. Prima vera! Trod the narra path. Faux satine. Bought a
rosary.
> "What kind of wood is this cross made of?", I asked Father John.
"Rosewood,"
> he said. And she did. Sycamore! But my back hurt. She said I had to go
on a
> diet. We went to a healthfood restaurant. I ordered a low-calorie
cocobolo,
> and we goncalo alves. Lost some weight, back pain went away. I'm oak
now,
> still pecan away.
Recently, my stepdad planted acorn patch.
I O-Pine that we should get out of Iraq before more of our people get
shipped home in wood.
I love the beech.
Tim Bruening
"fredm...@the.PC" wrote:
> Buffalo Chilkat <mam...@watering.hole> wrote in message
news:<2clmpv8tne311d2ot...@4ax.com>...
> > Samoa: in addition to.
>
> > Sam Owen: American of Samoan origin
>
> Sam owin': Our Samoan-American deep in debt.
>
> Polly Needs an American : Samoan Parrot, gone crackers, seeks U.S.
mail.
Are you Indo Nesia?
Tim Bruening
Hauke Reddmann <fc3...@uni-hamburg.de> wrote in message
news:bo60ns$mlr$1...@rzsun03.rrz.uni-hamburg.de...
> I have the fixed intention to discover an animal
> as yet unknown to science, but after years of
> searching in vain, I'm getting nessimistic.
>
Cryptozoology: Study of vampire animals?
Tim Bruening
Kathy wrote:
> "Michael Balarama" <mba...@ev1.net> wrote in message
> news:vod83qg...@corp.supernews.com...
> >
> > "Hauke Reddmann" <fc3...@uni-hamburg.de> wrote in message
> > news:bm5q9i$a0s$1...@rzsun03.rrz.uni-hamburg.de...
> > > Nehmo Sergheyev <neh...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> > > > I just went to a pun site made by a female, who, for obvious
reasons,
> I
> > > > won't name. Everything there is pretty normal, but at the bottom
of
> one
> > > > page is a button offering to show us her "Submission Form". I
*didn't*
> > > > press on it because how she does that shouldn't be on the web
and _I_
> > > > refuse to look at such an obscenity!
> > >
> > > Good that I didn't tell you about the cuneiform.
> >
> > I heard she uses a similar saying as Arnold uses-I"ll be on my
back.
> > >
> They say she and several other ladies formed a lumbar company.
Submission Form: Form you fill out to go to a church in the deep blue
sea.
nemo
Gillow: Large London department store on the ground after it started to find
life too Waring.
nemo
. . . or a beverage drunk by a musical technician who adjusts
the pitch of your close colleague's strings.
nemo
WOOF! The sound a cat makes when you pour petrol over it and light it.
MIAOWWWWWWW! The sound a dog makes when you throw it out of an aErOplane.
nemo
Not if he has sardines inside!
nemo
NN: Postcode of a very small farm with only two chickens.
EX: Postcode of what they lay.
TQ: Postcode a Devon café where the service of beverages is extremely slow.
HP: Postcode of a number of major finance companies.
(S) coda: Postcode of someone who drives a naff make of car.
(G) codes: What a Ticktack man uses.
GL: Postcode of an area where things are extremely unpleasant for
racehorses.
EC1: No difficulty in remembering this Postcode. The next one is quite EC2!
I can still remember the aching back and the positions of the pigeon-holes
for these on the sorting frame I was stood standing in front of all day!
Still - at least the work was so easy that the £7.42 per hour was money for
old rope. I was so tired afterwards I couldn't think of anything more
interesting to spend it on!
nemo
Hell 'n' Reddy: Him in his musical home.
nemo
Ken DOD? He was a comedian who tried to rip off the Inland Revenue.
nemo
Or someone from Somerset asking directions: "DOE know the way tyuw Barrow
Gurney?"
"No oy dewn't - bert Iy does know the way tyuw Handcart, Fred!"
nemo
. . . who can't spell!
Beechnut: A looney by teh seaside.
Bitternut: A kernel with teethmarkes already.
Bladdernut: What an incontinent robot turns when it needs to pee.
Butternut: Very unwise. You end up with a big red hexagonal mark on your
forehead.
Chestnut: Someone who goes mad every time he shouts 'Checkmate'!
Coconut: Soemone addictes to chocolate.
Cokernut: Imogen from 'Your Show of Shows' ' biggest fan
Donut: I tole dew - donut spell it like that!
Doughnut: Aaah. That's better!
Earthnut: At the back of an old fashioned wireless set. You run a wire from
this to a water pie and not a gas pipe - or else - BANGGGGG!!!
Gallnut: What a robot uses to turn on its liver when it needs to digest.
Groundnut: Someone with a maniacal fear of flying.
Hognut: A pigs 'melt.' (another stupid euphemism for chitterlings!)
Jarnut: You need a long spanner (wrench) for this one. It's usually jammed.
Kippernut:
Oilnut do any more for now, to leave some left for Tim.
nemo
Bert Weedon: Their guitar-tutor target.
nemo
Parody: Demon descending beneath a can o' pee.
nemo
Gay Ping Hole: Name of a Chinese rent boy.
nemo
Ex-porting: Low income bell by the sea that's been sent abroad and got
squashed!