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The Last Supper

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Keith Sullivan

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Jan 17, 2000, 3:00:00 AM1/17/00

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IT'S SO CLEAR

After 20 years of painstaking restoration, "The Last Supper" has been
put on display in Milan, Italy. "Now you can see the sign on the wall
behind Jesus: 'No shirt, no shoes, no salvation.'" (Bob Mills)

ShopTalk, June 10, 1999 <shop...@listserv.syr.edu>
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RESTORATION OF DA VINCI'S LAST SUPPER REVEALS JOHN LENNON WAS
PARTICIPANT

After decades of painstakingly restoring Leonardo da Vinci's masterpiece
fresco, "The Last Supper," the fresco now shows John Lennon seated at
the table just to the left of Jesus. The addition of the famous member
of the British rock band "The Beatles" as a participant in the final
meal of Jesus and his apostles has sparked considerable controversy.
Some critics believe that the lead-based paint used by the restoration
artists caused brain damage that accounts for the presence of Lennon.
Others contend that Lennon's own suspected use of lead-based paint may
account for his marriage to Yoko Ono. Supporters of the presence of
Lennon at the Last Supper point to the guitarist's statement in the
early Sixties that he and his group were "more famous than Jesus
Christ." A descendent of the Renaissance painter, Leonardo Di Caprio,
was unavailable for comment on the addition to the painting.

Breaking News Beyond Repair <http://bobsfridge.com/skew.htm>
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LAST SUPPER RETOUCHED -- NEW DISCIPLE FOUND

MILAN -- The tenth retouching of The Last Supper has revealed a number
of surprises, including an extra Disciple.

"His name was Todd. He stood mostly at the back," said Guiseppe
Milandri, head restorer of the painting. "Todd figured out how much to
tip the waiter. He also organized the group photo -- er ... painting.
Todd didn't want a lot of attention, but I guess he chose the wrong guy
to hang out with."

Restoration of The Last Supper has taken over 30 years to complete,
drawing criticism all the way. Critics claim the new Last Supper is an
insult to the old, filthy Last Supper, which many art students had built
their thesis on.

"The symbolism is all gone, not to mention the irony, and the
metaphors," said art critic Guiseppe Pirandello, whose career is focused
completely on that famous painting. "And I'm not going to even get into
the damage done to the similes. That's obvious."

Pirandello contends that earlier restorations eliminated Todd for a
reason. "The fact that he's standing behind Jesus, giving his Savior
rabbit ears should be enough reason enough to erase him from the
painting," said Pirandello. "Todd was always a card ... he should be
dealt with."

Also emerging from the grime was a side order of curly fries, held by
waiter standing by Todd's head. "The curly fries symbolize man's
inability to control his cholesterol," said Pirandello. "That and they
are part of that Ketchup-Representing-Man's-Relationship-With-Man
theory. DaVinci loved his condiments."

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