Exercise?

[Lafe]

I was going to take up lunges to stay in shape.

It was a big step forward.

Lafe

[Mike]

On Aug 19, 2022, Lafe wrote
(in article <tdpk8c$1pjrb$1...@dont-email.me>):

> I was going to take up lunges to stay in shape.
>
> It was a big step forward.
>
> Lafe

But you need to exercise some restraint till you get into shape.

Michael LeVine
mle...@redshift.com

Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
finding it everywhere,
diagnosing it incorrectly,
and applying the wrong remedies.
Groucho Marx

[Don Stockbauer]

And exercise will keep your lunges in shape for breathing.

[Mike]

On Aug 20, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<df92c411-9934-4aab...@googlegroups.com>):

You need to take a lung hard look at your exercise program.

[Don Stockbauer]

There were these creatures on Beta Reticuli VII ,
their sense of sight was produced by their lungs so they would go around taking lung hard looks at one another.

[Mike]

On Aug 20, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<e46e2e44-8b70-4e68...@googlegroups.com>):

And with lung-ing at the beautiful ones.

[Don Stockbauer]

There was a Planet where all the women were as beautiful as Darlene ,the planet just couldn't stand it anymore such beauty and it' self-destructed just like the earth did from Putin.

[Mike]

On Aug 21, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<6bd84981-cf95-4cc5...@googlegroups.com>):

It has n ot happened so far, you may be putin the cart before the horse

[Don Stockbauer]

He should be Putin an insane asylum.

[Mike]

On Aug 21, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<4bc64074-d8a9-483d...@googlegroups.com>):

Only if you can find one that has room for one more Putin. Maybe
if he said he was Napoleon or Alexander the Great there might be
and empty category he would fit in.

[Don Stockbauer]

Actually it's all happy talk. they're essentially in their own little world with a little chance of the outside getting to him . and then if somebody "got to him " I'm sure the country would re-organize in about five minutes into a working state.

[Mike]

On Aug 21, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<7947a8c0-2d9b-4311...@googlegroups.com>):

I disagree. Look at USSR after Stalin.

[Don Stockbauer]

But this is the modern Cybernetic age , the USSR didn't have all the advantages of modern self organization, emergence , transcendence , actual drills in quick reorganization , it would just be a piece a cake now. Chocolate.

[Mike]

On Aug 22, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<9819efea-52e9-4eec...@googlegroups.com>):

With all the generals they are loosing in the Ukraine as an example, I must
disagree.

[Don Stockbauer]

I'm not even sure what we're discussing here anymore; what are you advocating?

[Mike]

On Aug 22, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<7068511d-c7ca-4c1e...@googlegroups.com>):

We were discussing our disgust at something

[Mike]

On Aug 22, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<5f322da0-36fd-4db7...@googlegroups.com>):

> OK, let me try to clarify : if Putin were assassinated would that make
> everything in Russia and the Ukraine wondermous?????

That would only get rid of him, not his sycophant’s he has working for him
in syncopation with his plans.

[Don Stockbauer]

I think that's kind of what I said to begin with , that if Putin's taken out you have some re-organization of Russia but most likely they are prepared for that possibility and have probably even practiced the scenario.

[Mike]

On Aug 23, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<82fa4028-6c38-45b0...@googlegroups.com>):

And maybe cause it to happen???

[Don Stockbauer]

Dammit!!! all this speculation , it's endless, let's do something to actually make something come about !!!!

"mommy, I hear the ICBMs coming in ."

"oh no, darling, you don't hear them , they would be supersonic."

"oh mommy , I was wrong , in actuality I can't hear them coming in . so if I can't hear them coming in that means they're coming in , right ?"

"Little darling , you'll make an excellent logician as a career."

[Mike]

On Aug 23, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<6dd982fd-4e46-489e...@googlegroups.com>):

> "Little darling , you'll make an excellent logician as a career.”

Arn’t icy-bm’s hidden in chunks of blue ice subtle enough to hie the real
cause ???

[Don Stockbauer]

i've never heard that seems like it would be hard to maintain blue eyes especially through the whole trip from there to here . who knows ? there's that song 99 balloons, supposedly balloons set oft the alarms , hard to believe that I mean they go by mass and such. but what the hell I don "t know I just work here.

[Mike]

On Aug 23, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<507d097c-22a1-4ef0...@googlegroups.com>):

You call spending all day on A.H.P. working????

[Don Stockbauer]

No it's not working ,it's having tons of fun . it's like going into the bedroom with Darlene , coming out 26 hours later drained . it's like shooting minnows in a pond or like dodging drones as they fly over the ranch . Itz a joy being here.

[Mike]

On Aug 24, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<58603d59-2dce-4807...@googlegroups.com>):

More like a joy-buzzer...

[Don Stockbauer]

Darlene has a special vibrator she calls her joy-buzzer.

[Mike]

On Aug 24, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<fe2faed3-2de0-465e...@googlegroups.com>):

But you will be telling me it is no great shakes compared to you...

[Don Stockbauer]

I will admit that our favorite sex act is when , how to put this gracefully , I'm down there giving her a Humm job and she keeps complaining that I was humming the Battle Humm of the Republic and I tried to convince her that it's not which hymm you humm, It's the mere fact that I humm.

[Mike]

On Aug 25, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<2584f973-7104-4e7e...@googlegroups.com>):

And that is one humm-dinger of a story.

[Don Stockbauer]

You know those bells you ring on a counter when you want to get the clerk's attention?
I invented one for people that have no arms , what they do they hum at the bell to make it ding so I called it The Humdinger.

[Mike]

On Aug 25, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<290ef511-8654-4cd0...@googlegroups.com>):

Why did you have to chime in with that oldie???

[Don Stockbauer]

I invented a gizmo with a chime on it and every time you ring the chime it helps prevent global warming.
I gave it the name Chime-It Change.

[Mike]

On Aug 26, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<94509d9b-4b76-4d25...@googlegroups.com>):

Don’t expect me to give it my ringing endorsement without corroboration
that really works

[Don Stockbauer]

If the climate gets better and then we would've course the tribute that change to my gizmo, right?

[Mike]

On Aug 26, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<98ddb653-36d3-4585...@googlegroups.com>):

Or the placebo effect

[Don Stockbauer]

there is a town near Victoria called Placedo.

[Mike]

On Aug 26, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<cf86dbf8-d12d-43b0...@googlegroups.com>):

> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, August 21, 2022 at 3:40:53 AM UTC-5,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Mike
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Aug 20, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<e46e2e44-8b70-4e68...@googlegroups.

Place do what?? Besides attract tourist because of the name???

[Don Stockbauer]

I'm fairly certain that "Placedo" means "inverted nipples" in Spanish.

[Mike]

On Aug 27, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<f7940fba-1ba5-47de...@googlegroups.com>):

> On Saturday, August 27, 2022 at 2:57:13 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > there is a town near Victoria called Placedo.
> > Place do what?? Besides attract tourist because of the name???
>

> I'm fairly certain that "Placedo" means "inverted nipples" in Spanish.

That sucks

[Don Stockbauer]

there was this cartoon the National Lampoon had and the caption read "oh god oh god baby suck me baby suck me baby oh God suck it suck me baby " then they revealed that it was an infant nursing at its mother's breast."

it was another video that showed what appeared to be sequences of erotic body parts and then right at the end they drew the camera back and they had been imaging an infant.

[Mike]

On Aug 27, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<a3f5a65c-3629-478b...@googlegroups.com>):

And YOU knew the difference right away!!!!

[Don Stockbauer]

You're implying that I've had erotic actions with an infant!!!!!!

How dare you !!!!!

Well, only several times ,anyway.

Is it illegal?

[Mike]

On Aug 28, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<8916b840-9e23-4cff...@googlegroups.com>):

Just an extrapolation on my part -- other wise I am bairn of any facts,

[Don Stockbauer]

okay you've twisted my arm and forced it out of me; I've engaged in S&M , B&D , D&S , bondage ,
flagellation , and cutting out paper dolls ,I do it all down in the bairn.

[Mike]

On Aug 28, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<11c04131-f680-4ad5...@googlegroups.com>):

They let you have scissors??

[Don Stockbauer]

They do let me have scissors. They're the kind they give to first graders made out of plastic .
another neat thing you can do along those lines is send a message to a magazine written in crayon and tell them "I'm sorry about the
crayon, but they don't let me have anything sharp here."

[Mike]

On Aug 29, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<d517c7c4-4b95-4c47...@googlegroups.com>):

> crayon, but they don't let me have anything sharp here.”

WOuld that be Mad Magazine??

[Don Stockbauer]

yes yes that was one of their running gags along with using such words as flushinginger and so forth but They had a lot of good stuff and then National Lampoon had the same format but a little more X-rated although they did very little true X-rated stuff it's funny that nat lamp claimed to be liberal although they had some really racist stuff in the magazine. the really neat thing is they're offering something on an iPhone now where you can project a background to your phone call like you're somewhere where you not and I remember MAD had that like 50 years ago. I looked it up them predicting that that would be available like a man's at a bar and he phones his wife and tells her he's at the train station because that's the background he's projecting.

[Mike]

On Aug 30, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<26e3c5a4-168d-4784...@googlegroups.com>):

I remember that article in Mad --- maybe we will se it again
as they are now only reprinting old stuff, nothing new anymore.

[Don Stockbauer]

search for it online it's out there .
the reason I tracked it down I remembered they had a backdrop "Fool yourself"and I couldn't imagine what they did for that. it turns out a man's phoning another person saying we're not having the bridge party tonight because of painters and the guy had mistakenly used a backdrop of them playing bridge and behind the backdrop they're playing bridge in reality.

[Mike]

On Aug 30, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<1ce1621d-5af4-4806...@googlegroups.com>):

So he painted himself into a corner

[Don Stockbauer]

Isn't that what we've done by developing nuclear weapons?

[Mike]

On Aug 31, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<e05d499e-7798-4a5e...@googlegroups.com>):

SO, the idea of every one getting bombed has you going out and getting bombed

[Don Stockbauer]

Yes you hit the nail on the head the only way for me to keep my mind off of it is 3 fifths of Night Train a day.

[Mike]

On Aug 31, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<c5530d5e-f327-4867...@googlegroups.com>):

You sot out that kind of life

[Don Stockbauer]

I once told Darlene "you drunken sot, a friend of the Devil is no friend of mine " and Darlene answered back "none for you tonight, buddy"

[Mike]

On Aug 31, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<d1982e7a-1abe-45de...@googlegroups.com>):

> mine " and Darlene answered back "none for you tonight, buddy”
A roll in the hay with a nun!!! Does that make her a Holy Roller???

[Don Stockbauer]

I got curious about the etymology of the word nun so I looked it up in an etymology book and it read "nuns are creatures that don't get nun and don't want nun" I thought well that's probably simplistic ,probably a lot of them get a bunch and want a bunch.

[Mike]

On Sep 1, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<6fac6417-6e8a-4d2f...@googlegroups.com>):

So chasing women in a convent is a nun-sequitur

[Don Stockbauer]

I've chased women in a convent before and I don't know what it was but the head nun there didn't approve of it too much.

And how did I know which one was the head nun? (drum roll):

She's the one with the dirty knees.

[Mike]

On Sep 1, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<eb7579fa-cabd-4b1f...@googlegroups.com>):

With her you used the Superior position???

[Don Stockbauer]

yes. There's a line from a Beatles song which goes "mother superior jumped the gun , mother superior jumped the gun " and we all know that gun is a euphemism for penis , so we'll leave the conclusion as an exercise to the reader.

[Mike]

On Sep 2, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<fb8708c3-5e7c-4bf9...@googlegroups.com>):

You gat to be kidding, the nun’s prefer using the rod -- ask any Catholic
School student/

[Don Stockbauer]

I was in first grade in Catholic school and the nun gave some sort of assignment and she said "now we can all do this can't we , children " and old Don pipes up with "No", she came to my desk and slapped me across the face as hard as she could.

[Mike]

On Sep 2, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<8624a090-2d78-49b0...@googlegroups.com>):

> On Friday, September 2, 2022 at 1:13:03 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > On Sep 2, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

> > > yes. There's a line from a Beatles song which goes "mother superior jumped
> > > the gun , mother superior jumped the gun " and we all know that gun is a
> > > euphemism for penis , so we'll leave the conclusion as an exercise to the
> > > reader.
> > You gat to be kidding, the nun’s prefer using the rod -- ask any Catholic
> > School student/
> > Michael LeVine
> > mle...@redshift.com
> >
> > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > finding it everywhere,
> > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > Groucho Marx
>
> I was in first grade in Catholic school and the nun gave some sort of
> assignment and she said "now we can all do this can't we , children " and old
> Don pipes up with "No", she came to my desk and slapped me across the face as
> hard as she could.

At least it was not Moe who would have gone for the eyes.

[Don Stockbauer]

Being slapped that hard was quite enough for me ;
I reformed immediately. I didn't want any Moe.

[Mike]

On Sep 3, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<c989acce-a809-4158...@googlegroups.com>):

A strikeing admission

[Don Stockbauer]

My uncle Waldo is a member of local steel workers union number 28 ; they went on strike but they decided to keep it secret . however , by demanding to know and actually threatening him with torture he made a striking admission.

[Mike]

On Sep 3, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<686b0644-789b-43e6...@googlegroups.com>):

Is this the same Waldo everyone is looking for??

[Don Stockbauer]

Yes, Waldo stole some top level nuclear war secrets and he declared "I'll be hiding out somewhere on the face of the earth."

[Mike]

On Sep 4, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<6cd357b5-4c61-4e04...@googlegroups.com>):

> hiding out somewhere on the face of the earth.” Thats a mug’s game

[Don Stockbauer]

I don't know why there is a controversy over whether the earth is flat or spherical; if the earth were flat and you traveled to the edge the edge effects would be quite noticeable.

[Mike]

On Sep 4, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<da41bbe5-bc64-4a65...@googlegroups.com>):

And all those turtles are hard to miss

[Don Stockbauer]

Lebusha (she's Darlene's girlfriend) and I were on a cruise and we stopped at the Cayman Islands and saw all the wonderful turtles there , then we came back to Texas and went down to the gulf coast, Padre Island , a guy was telling us "around here you can see all kinds of turtles and you don't have to go on an expensive cruise", and I told him "you're right , sir , we're idiots ; we wasted all that money. I think we should be shot!!!"

[Mike]

On Sep 4, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<017b7e17-3a26-400b...@googlegroups.com>):

> idiots ; we wasted all that money. I think we should be shot!!!”
Especially for what a shot of whiskey costs on a cruise ship.

[Don Stockbauer]

No I'm sorry you're incorrect the name of this cruise line was "trans world cruises for shitface drunk alcoholics Inc. " snd the whiskey shots were free.

[Mike]

On Sep 5, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<67fbe3b9-1ecd-4d5b...@googlegroups.com>):

You have fermented a lot of controversy in AA by the remark.

[Don Stockbauer]

The way you firm in a lot of controversy in AA is by chopping the bodies up , throwing them in a big vet and adding sugar and yeast.

[Mike]

On Sep 5, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<c76f0654-2a38-4249...@googlegroups.com>):

You do need to bone up on your body disposal methods.

[Don Stockbauer]

I have boned up on my method of burying somebody. the very best way is to leave one arm sticking out of the ground.

[Mike]

On Sep 6, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<86b77795-a4fc-4e4a...@googlegroups.com>):

So if they could talk, they would cry “Arms for the love of Alah"

[Don Stockbauer]

If a person is buried with a watch that chimed every hour , would that bother him or her after a few centuries?

[Mike]

On Sep 6, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<a32289b5-0744-4515...@googlegroups.com>):

> no On Tuesday, September 6, 2022 at 10:32:29 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > On Sep 6, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > (in article<86b77795-a4fc-4e4a...@googlegroups.com>):
> > >

> > > I have boned up on my method of burying somebody. the very best way is to
> > > leave one arm sticking out of the ground.
> > So if they could talk, they would cry “Arms for the love of Alah"
> > Michael LeVine
> > mle...@redshift.com
> >
> > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > finding it everywhere,
> > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > Groucho Marx
>
> If a person is buried with a watch that chimed every hour , would that bother
> him or her after a few centuries?

Now that is what I call self-winding

[Don Stockbauer]

We have a snake here in Texas called a sidewinder ; no one helps it move , it does it all by itself. Therefore it's self winding.

[Mike]

On Sep 6, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<0b822b3e-fa7e-4df1...@googlegroups.com>):

But are not as dangerous as the Hoop Snakes we had rolling around the Mojave
Dessert

[Don Stockbauer]

They're called that because they like to do the hula hoop?

[Mike]

On Sep 7, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<95b8e3a2-6182-4449...@googlegroups.com>):

Thats how they hunt their prey --- they run over them as they roll along.

[Don Stockbauer]

Does Bunker Hunt use them kind of like a bird retrieving dog?

[Mike]

On Sep 7, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<9b8ac8d7-20f3-4ec7...@googlegroups.com>):

They are no good for hunting bunkers, just smaller animals.

[Don Stockbauer]

I was hunting bunkers , I was head of this big country and I was deposed and I needed to find some place to hide out from everyone so I need to find a bunker.

[Mike]

On Sep 7, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<3b2220a8-a53c-4737...@googlegroups.com>):

But Archie Bunker was not the right person to hide behind

[Don Stockbauer]

Bunker Hunt though really was , as fat as he was.

[Mike]

On Sep 8, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<362aed01-057e-4c01...@googlegroups.com>):

THat con game was closed down by the bunker squad.

[Don Stockbauer]

A lot of coin collections were melted down because of Bunker Hunt.

[Mike]

On Sep 8, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<cb190df4-db8b-4f94...@googlegroups.com>):

So that explains the crowd hunting in bunkers for him

[Don Stockbauer]

Yes he's the one along with Adolf Hitler in the bunker. He requested some gasoline he must be going on a trip.

[Mike]

On Sep 9, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
(in article<c6cc6aed-a4f0-48c7...@googlegroups.com>):

A hit of LSD would be cheaper and quicker.

[Don Stockbauer]

Maybe Hitler WAS on a trip as he commanded the Germans in Human Folly II.

[Mike]

On Sep 9, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote

(in article<ac5116f3-e3a3-4f22...@googlegroups.com>):

According to one study, they were all on Meth.