Every time I come onto this group . . .
nemo
several hundred new messages, I know it's a case of very bad timming!! :o)
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Every time I come onto this group and see the headers download clock up
> several hundred new messages, I know it's a case of very bad timming!! :o)
Timming: A Chinese vase like me?
kamyknickers
"Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:405BE7D0...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
Deep ends. Are you narrow at the top and toes, and roundish in the middle?
Michael Balarama
"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
news:jeP6c.111263$sw3....@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> Every time I come onto this group and see the headers download clock up
> several hundred new messages, I know it's a case of very bad timming!!
:o)
I second that....oh wait a minute
>
>
nemo
J. A. Mc. <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote in message
news:c65p50986dj32v82c...@4ax.com...
> On Sat, 20 Mar 2004 05:31:22 -0600, "kamyknickers" <lazy...@mytruck.com>
> found these unused words floating about:
> >"Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> >news:405BE7D0...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >> nemo wrote:
> >>
> >> > Every time I come onto this group and see the headers download clock
up
> >> > several hundred new messages, I know it's a case of very bad
timming!!
> >Deep ends. Are you narrow at the top and toes, and roundish in the
middle?
> Just b'Reuning the group(s).
>
I was just being humerus but you've made it a bone of contention!
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Every time I come onto this group and see the headers download clock up
> several hundred new messages, I know it's a case of very bad timming!! :o)
Timming: A Chinese vase like me?
nemo
You deserve to Dynasty for that one! :o)
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Every time I come onto this group and see the headers download clock up
> several hundred new messages, I know it's a case of very bad timming!! :o)
Timming: A Chinese vase like me?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Every time I come onto this group and see the headers download clock up
> several hundred new messages, I know it's a case of very bad timming!! :o)
Timming: A Chinese vase like me?
nemo
You're made of ceramic?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
No, I don't have clay feet.
Tim Bruening
nemo
You're Chinese? Tim Brue Ning?
Tim Bruening
nemo
sting like a bee! - and get serious brain damage through getting stung back,
and then pretend it's Alzheimer's Syndrome rather than bruising to the
cerebral cortex due to the boxing because a lot of people make a lot of
money out of boxing, so even as a victim you're not allowed to criticise it!
So there! :o(
Tim Bruening
nemo
anyway! Buzzing like a fly and stinging like a butterfly might have proved
difficult too.
Tim Bruening
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
No, I don't have clay feet.
nemo
You don't dance like a butterfly and sting like a bee then?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Every time I come onto this group and see the headers download clock up
> several hundred new messages, I know it's a case of very bad timming!! :o)
Timming: A Chinese vase like me?
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
No, I don't have clay feet.
Tim Bruening
Braking: Donkey king.
Breaking: Destructive king.
Gawking: Tourist king.
Kayaking: King with oars.
Tim Bruening
Knocking: A door to door sales king.
Panicking: Frightened king.
Picnicking: King out for fun in the sun.
Purrking: Feline king.
Spanking: Corporal punishment king.
Tim Bruening
Emu: Sound of an Internet Cow.
Emu: Internet subatomic particle.
Ebay: Where computers swim.
Icing: Downloaded Internet songs.
Tim Bruening
Infantry: Militaristic baby tree.
Adultery: Wandering grown up tree.
Client: A needy ant.
Dependent: Another needy ant.
Defendant: Ant on trial.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:41168AE3...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:41143021...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > Typing: Secretary bell.
> > > >
> > > > Flapping: Flying bell.
> > > >
> > > > Sleeping: Bell doing the Zs.
> > > >
> > > > Starting: Astronomical bell.
> > > >
> > > > Starting: Acting bell.
> > > >
> > > > Starting: Beginning bell.
> > > >
> > > > Hyping: Bell up above.
> > > >
> > > > Hyping: Exaggerated bell.
> > > >
> > > > Averting: Bell that prevents trouble.
> > >
> > > Advertising: Frozen billboard.
> >
> > Why?
>
> Brain in gear?
>
> (FX: Rev . . Rev . . Clunk! Clunk! Grinnnnddd! Rattle . . . Clunk!)
>
> OK. Earwig "O" . . .
>
> Advert - Icing!
>
> Get it?
> Got it!
> Good?
>
> Adverticing the film, "The Caught Jester."
Jester: Spinning entertainer in a royal court.
Congest: Against court fools.
Digest: To color a court fool.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4299AA89...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:4296474D...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > "Elisabeth Müller" wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > On Tue, 30 Mar 2004 08:01:08 GMT, s...@zjod.net (Steve Siegfried)
> > > > > wrote:
> > > > >
> > > > > >
> > > > > >We hit a club.
> > > > >
> > > > > Better than the other way.
> > > >
> > > > Clubby: A thick apine piece of wood.
> > > >
> > > Club Foot: Pedal extremity between three slices of toasted bread.
> > >
> > > Extremity: A second Walter character played by Danny Kaye fantasising
> about
> > > how he could deal with things.
> > >
> > > Infirmity: Same character wearing a mink coat.
> >
> > Infirmity: Sick glove.
> >
> Mitigate: Walter's style of walking.
Magnanimity: Generous glove.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4299AB2A...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:4296E5CA...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > Dan Mercer wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > "Steve Siegfried" <s...@zjod.net> wrote in message
> > > news:J4ohc.179007$K91.447637@attbi_s02...
> > > > > :
> > > > > : Folks,
> > > > > :
> > > > > : The senior son sent me an article yesterday from Yahoo.news about
> > > > > : the sudden demise of 60 year-old McDonald's CEO, Jim Cantalupo,
> who
> > > > > : died on Monday of an apparent heart attack.
> > > > > :
> > > > > : The article came tagged with his message: "Ummm....I'll take Irony
> > > > > : for 300, Alex."
> > > > >
> > > > > I guess the senior son hasn't watched Jeopardy in a couple of years.
> > > >
> > > > Jeopardy: A demon in distress.
> > > >
> > > Jeopard: Spotted big cat in danger.
> >
> > Parody: Demon satire.
> >
> Or a pretend Macaw or African Grey.
Tragedy: A demon death in the family.
Tim Bruening
Checker: Inspector dog.
Checkers: Board game playing dog.
Checkers: Dogs from the Czech Republic.
Checkers: Checks written by dogs.
Tim Bruening
Jerker: Obnoxious dog.
Masker: Dog of many faces.
Pecker: Dog who pokes holes in wood.
Thicker: Fat dog.
Thinker: Intelligent dog.
Treker: Dog on the Starship Enterprise.
Tricker: Halloween dog.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Hmm. There's some motor-racing coming on TV at the moment. The announcer
> just said it's at Momser.
>
> Must be a right bastard of a racetrack!
Not a left bastard?
Tim Bruening
Censor: Rising penny.
Cream Mate: Lotions making love.
Sensor: Detecting penny.
Transmit: Glove with ambiguous gender.
Transcript: Play about ambiguous gender.
Tim Bruening
Igloo: Frozen toilet.
Moppet: Pet that cleans floors.
Strumpet: Domestic Animal playing a Guitar.
nemo
You're made of porcelain? Praps you're using a Clay Computer too - not a PC.
nemo
You can't "Fly like a butterfly and sting like a bee" then.
nemo
Or the voice of a Counter-tenor, Descant or Castrato!
nemo
Spanking: The engineer who builds the longest suspension bridges.
nemo
. . or a formicida with ears in its arse that don't work!
nemo
Kayaking: A named girl talking loudly.
nemo
Jester minute: How little time a bad Court fool lasts before he gets
executed!
nemo
Chequers: Original spelling as used by the Chancellor of the Exchequer who
draws little black and white squares on chicken's ova, ova and ova again.
nemo
The word 'right' is used in English thus to convey emphasis, often together
with 'bleedin' as in 'a right bleedin bastard!'.
(Note: Bleeding is often pronounced 'bleeton' with a glottal stop for the
/t/.)
The pun is between the Italian racetrack, Monza, and Momser which is Hebrew
for bastard.
http://www.peevish.co.uk/slang/b.htm
bleeder Noun. An objectionable person.
bleeding Adv. Used as an intensive. E.g."That bleeding idiot from next door
is drunk again."
nemo
. . performed across the cellar of a church?
nemo
>
> Igloo: Frozen toilet.
>
> Moppet: Pet that cleans floors.
(Careful. Accordion to a documentary years ago, that's pędophile slang for a
pre-teen child. How downright disrespectful and offensive can they get?)
> Strumpet: Domestic Animal playing a Guitar.
Floozy: Strumpet with a nasty winter bug. (A cockroach wearing a fur coat
that smacks you in the mouth!)
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
Floozy: Zombie with a nasty winter bug.
nemo
>
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > news:433F07B6...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > >
> > > Igloo: Frozen toilet.
> > >
> > > Moppet: Pet that cleans floors.
> >
for a
> > pre-teen child. How downright disrespectful and offensive can they get?)
> >
> > > Strumpet: Domestic Animal playing a Guitar.
> >
> > Floozy: Strumpet with a nasty winter bug. (A cockroach wearing a fur
coat
> > that smacks you in the mouth!)
>
> Floozy: Zombie with a nasty winter bug.
>
mouth?!
Tim Bruening
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:41E20021...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> You're made of ceramic?
No, I don't have clay feet.
Centime: One penny time machine.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:402C93DD...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > Amusing: Singing comedian.
> >
> > Bemusing: Singing bee poet.
> >
> > Ceasing: Singing mermaid.
> >
> > Musing: Singing exotic subatomic particle.
> >
> > Tracing: Singing flat dish container.
>
> Poncing: Singing band of nerve fibres/fibers linking the medulla oblongata
> and the cerebellum with the midbrain.
>
> Oblongata: Worn by a girl with very funny-shaped legs.
Wincing: Singing in pain.
Fencing: Singing foils.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Q: What's that guy doing jumping up and down in the corner using extremely
> bad language.
> A: That's swored dancing.
>
> Q: Who's that jumping up and down on top of a very old British car.
> A: That's Morris dancing.
>
> Q: What's that map of England doing jumping up and down for?
> A: That's Country Dancing.
>
> Q: Who's that jumping up and down in the corner with no clothes on?
> A: It's Simon Smith and He's Dancing Bare.
>
> Q: What's that guy doing jumping up and down with all his arms and legs in
> plaster.
> A: Break Dancing.
>
> I was going to do one about Ballet as well, but it was just tutu difficult!
Q: What is that armed man with combat fatigues doing jumping?
A: He's Contra dancing.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:411C676F...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > Helmet: Glove of the Devil.
> >
> > Lucifer: Fur of the Devil.
> >
> > Satan: What the Devil does in the sunlight.
>
> Lucifer: Lucille Ball's winter coat.
What kind of coat does a house wear?
A coat of paint.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:411C67A3...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > Basing: Singing sheep in San Francisco.
> >
> > Bashing: Singing sheep.
> >
> > Bracing: Singing Ass.
> >
> > Dicing: Gambing singer.
>
> Wincing: A song of agony sung by a lot of paople here and Bill Gates at
> seeing these puns again for the umpteenth time.
>
> Umpteen: A camel between the ages of 13 and 19.
Canteen: Adolescent container.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4283DF45...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:4281AD32...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > Picking: King of lifting things.
> > > >
> > > > Pocking: Acne king.
> > > >
> > > > Pucking: Hockey king.
> > > >
> > > > Puking: Vomit king.
> > > >
> > > > Quaking: Religious pacifist king.
> > >
> > > Plucking: Harpo Marx becomes a monarch.
> >
> > A Red King?
> >
> That's be Karl, you Charlie!
>
> Long, thin snow-shoes for horses: Trotskis.
Nucliotides: Tides on a nuetron star.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:410DE676...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > "Milton J. Smuthworthy, I" wrote:
> >
> > > Then Larry Krzewinski said:
> > > >On Sun, 25 Jul 2004 14:38:04 -0700, "ynotssor" <ynot...@example.net>
> > > >wrote:
> > > >
> > > >>"Milton J. Smuthworthy, I" <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote in
> > > >>message news:4103fc24$0$25470$45be...@newscene.com
> > > >>
> > > >>> 29 years now? Wow, that *is* quite a camping trip! Hey, you didn't
> > > >>> happen to jump out of an airliner with a big bag of cash did you?
> > > >>
> > > >>I can honestly say that I've only made one jump from a Boeing 727 in
> my
> > > >>life, and that was from 15,000 ft.
> > > >
> > > >So how much of the cash do you have left, D.B.?
> > >
> > > And what percentage is he offering for us to keep our mouths shut?
>
> You'll starve!
> >
> > Will he send it COD?
> >
> You won't even be able to eat that!
Eating: Internet bell.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:41ECB121...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > Allowing: A permissive bird.
> >
> > Blowing: A windy bird.
> >
> > Growing: Very big wings.
> >
> > Harrowing: Risk taking bird.
> >
> > Rowing: Bird in a small boat propelled by oars.
> >
> > Slowing: Bird that doesn't move very fast.
> >
> > Throwing: Bird from the big leagues.
> >
> Throwt: Flying gizzard!
Wowing: An amazing bird.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Why would you want to lag a jet?
>
> To prevent icing?
Icing: Songs on the Internet.
Tim Bruening
"Cybe R. Wizard" wrote:
> On Tue, 14 Oct 2003 12:20:25 -0700
> J. A. Mc. <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote:
>
> > On Tue, 14 Oct 2003 04:22:29 GMT, Buffalo Chilkat
> > <mam...@watering.hole> found these unused words floating about:
> >
> > >nemo wrote:
> > >>Hauke Reddmann wrote ..
> > >>> A Boeing goes to the doctor: "My wings hurt!"
> > >>> "No wonder, they have ailerons!"
> > >>Oh no it didn't. It couldn't get into the ruddy elevators!
> > >
> > >This is a tall tail.
> > Much flap about nothing ...
> >
> You're right. I would not bank on the difference or my courage might
> take a nosedive.
Stop stalling!
Stalling: Baby horse housing.
Housing: Indians singing Hello.
Tim Bruening
"J. A. Mc." wrote:
> On Sun, 21 Sep 2003 16:27:08 -0700, "Nick Bell"
> <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> found these unused words floating about:
>
> >
> >"J. A. Mc." <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote in message news:q3bsmv0f1bljm440a...@4ax.com...
> >| On Sun, 21 Sep 2003 17:06:37 GMT, "J H Lowy" <jhl...@optonline.net>
> >| found these unused words floating about:
> >|
> >| >"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
> >| >news:GNkbb.93597$B%2.8...@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> >| >>
> >| >> Nick Bell <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> >| >> news:vmpbibb...@corp.supernews.com...
> >| >> >
> >| >> >
> >| >> > There are the descendants of French people in Northern Ireland. They are
> >| >> called Ulster Onionists.
> >| >> >
> >| >> And they speak Garlic??
> >| >>
> >| >> It's the ones in Belgium who cause all the trouble. Slightest bit of
> >| >> contraversy and the Walloons go up!
> >| >>
> >| >Ouch! Born in Antwerp and never went back.
> >| >
> >| Is Antwerp the next worm hole in the Spacewerp?
> >|
> >First they have to put on warppaint.
> >
> That's an enterprising solution once tried by Holland Oats.
How Quark-y!
Tim Bruening
Nehmo Sergheyev wrote:
> I saw a building next the Medical Center with a sign identifying it as
> the Nursing School. I saw nothing wrong with this until I learned babies
> know how to nurse without being taught. And worse than that, this school
> was for adults!
I've often seen ads for Baby Sales, and seen Rash Doors at Kaiser. In
fact, there is a baby sale going on this week!
Kaiser: German knight.
Tim Bruening
Palema wrote:
> mike wheeELer wrote:
>
> > In article <2m6a20pca10fbvl50...@4ax.com>,
> > jaS...@gbr.online.com, J. A. Mc. was looking at the world oddly when:
> >
> >>On 6 Feb 2004 18:46:37 -0800, art...@yahoo.com (artyw) found these unused
> >>words floating about:
> >>
> >>
> >>>Palema <pale...@sbcglobal.net> wrote in message
> >
> > news:<68SUb.1256$wt.454@newss
> >
> >>vr23.news.prodigy.com>...
> >>
> >>>>At the White House: We want you to fillmore at home
> >>>
> >>>Dont Polk fun at our presidents.
> >>
> >>Carter explain?
> >>
> >
> > He say nix on that idea..
> >
> Ag knew that would happen!
Spiro: Row of primitive weapons.
Tim Bruening
Curl Ling: A Chinese with bent hair.
Drumming: A percussion Chinese vase.
Goal Lee: Korean who guards the goal.
Pale Line: White Chinese.
Pail Ling: Chinese water container.
Tim Bruening
Lowing: Bird on the ground.
Mewing, Meowing: Cat-bird.
Mellowing: Bird calming down.
Minnowing: Small flying fish.
Mowing: Bird cutting the grass.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:41E76768...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > "Cybe R. Wizard" wrote:
> >
> > > On Tue, 14 Oct 2003 12:20:25 -0700
> > > J. A. Mc. <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote:
> > >
> > > > On Tue, 14 Oct 2003 04:22:29 GMT, Buffalo Chilkat
> > > > <mam...@watering.hole> found these unused words floating about:
> > > >
> > > > >nemo wrote:
> > > > >>Hauke Reddmann wrote ..
> > > > >>> A Boeing goes to the doctor: "My wings hurt!"
> > > > >>> "No wonder, they have ailerons!"
> > > > >>Oh no it didn't. It couldn't get into the ruddy elevators!
> > > > >
> > > > >This is a tall tail.
> > > > Much flap about nothing ...
> > > >
> > > You're right. I would not bank on the difference or my courage might
> > > take a nosedive.
> >
> > Sewing: Textile birds.
> >
> > Rowing: Line of birds.
> >
> > Towing: Bird foot digits.
> >
> > Vowing: Bird oaths.
> >
> Curlew: Large migratory shorebird of the sandpiper family.
>
> Curfew: Large migratory shorebird of the sandpiper family only now nearly
> extinct.
Curling: Baby dog.
Tim Bruening
What do jelly babies wear on their feet?
Gum boots.
Tim Bruening
What did the puddle say to the rain?
"Drop in sometime".
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:427C7014...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> > "J. A. Mc." wrote:
> >
> > > On Sun, 21 Sep 2003 17:06:37 GMT, "J H Lowy" <jhl...@optonline.net>
> > > found these unused words floating about:
> > >
> > > >"nemo" <ne...@naughtylass2.wet> wrote in message
> > > >news:GNkbb.93597$B%2.8...@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> > > >>
> > > >> Nick Bell <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> > > >> news:vmpbibb...@corp.supernews.com...
> > > >> >
> > > >> >
> > > >> > There are the descendants of French people in Northern Ireland.
> > They are
> > > >> called Ulster Onionists.
> > > >> >
> > > >> And they speak Garlic??
> > > >>
> > > >> It's the ones in Belgium who cause all the trouble. Slightest bit
> > of
> > > >> contraversy and the Walloons go up!
> > > >>
> > > >Ouch! Born in Antwerp and never went back.
> > > >
> > > Is Antwerp the next worm hole in the Spacewerp?
> >
> > Antwerp: A social insect going faster than light?
>
> Ann Twerp: A silly and contemptible Belgian young lady.
Belgian: A musical gian.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:427C6E2D...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:4226DF4F...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > "J. A. Mc." wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > On Mon, 24 May 2004 04:11:49 GMT, "Chris Trask"
> > > > <chris...@earthlink.net>
> > > > > found these unused words floating about:
> > > > >
> > > > > >
> > > > > >
> > > > > >"Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > > > >news:40B0ACCE...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > > >> To be franc, this is nonsense!
> > > > > >>
> > > > > >> Shall I pound this message further?
> > > > > >>
> > > > > >> Mark my words.
> > > > > >>
> > > > > >
> > > > > > I have to peso back and forth to think of something clever as I
> > > > have a
> > > > > >yen to contribute to this thread. I'm a bit lira of running afoul
> of
> > > >
> > > > > >anyone's sensitivities due to a monetary lapse of thoughtfulness.
> > > > > >
> > > > > But it was still centavo the internet!
> > > >
> > > > Lets Buck the trend towards war!
> > > >
> > > > Franc ly, I'm sick of Iraq!
> > > >
> > > Lets also Buck the trend towards Rogers!
> >
> > And Kingham Palace?
> >
> Big house where the Queeeeeeen and Chintz Prarles jump out and frighten
> anyone wearing clothing made of plaid cloth: Boo! Gingham Palace.
Kingham: The Pork King.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:427C71DF...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:422831EE...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > All our kings have been quite good actors.
> >
> > Including the Nazi Prince?
> >
> And half the Mitford family!!
Mitford: Glove that crossed the river.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:427C6D6F...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > "J. A. Mc." wrote:
> >
> > > On Tue, 20 Apr 2004 09:58:04 -0600, "Bill Colmers"
> > <sambo...@whatever.ca>
> > > found these unused words floating about:
> > >
> > > >
> > > >"Pavel314" <Pave...@comcast.net> wrote in message
> > > >news:VuOdnW57yc3...@comcast.com...
> > > >> Tomorrow, April 20, is Hitler's birthday. I've been invited to a
> > Nazi
> > > >party.
> > > >> It's a white sheet affair.
> > > >>
> > > >
> > > >I though it was like formalwear for Bush's Inauguration: white tie
> > and brown
> > > >shirt.
> > > >
> > > If you liked that, wait until you see Kerry's choice ... red shirt
> > with
> > > yellow stripe ...
> >
> > You are calling him a cowardly Communist?
> >
> He desserted from the Communist Party when they found out he was a cowardy
> custard.
Cowardy: A bovine demon with no courage.
Tim Bruening
nemo wrote:
> Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> news:4046C565...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> >
> >
> > nemo wrote:
> >
> > > Tim Bruening <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > news:4041E326...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
> > > > Therapy: A pea you eat to feel better.
> > > >
> > > > You are a grape human bean.
> > >
> > > A nabsulute bounder got a girl drunk on wine once and then had his
> wicked
> > > way with her. She later went to the police station and reported that
> she'd
> > > been graped!
> >
> > Wicker: Dog on food stamps.
> >
> > Wicker: Evil dog.
> >
> Wicker Man: Edward Woodward wouldn't!
Whisker: Long thin dog.
Whisper: Price of small light remnant.
Tim Bruening
Jawing: Talky bird.
Knowing: Smart bird.
Mowing: Flying grass cutter.
Owing: Borrowed bird.
Rowing: Bird in a canoe.
Tim Bruening
Easter: Computerized Mixing bowl.
Easter: Spinning religious holiday.
Blowing: Windy bird.
Cowing: Flying bovine. Also known as Red Bull.
Cowtowing: Helping a fallen bovine get up.
nemo
>
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > Every time I come onto this group and see the headers download clock up
> > several hundred new messages, I know it's a case of very bad timming!!
:o)
>
> Timming: A Chinese vase like me?
You have the Timerity to suggest such a thing?
nemo
> > >
> > >
> > > nemo wrote:
> > >
> > > > Every time I come onto this group and see the headers download clock
up
> > > > several hundred new messages, I know it's a case of very bad
timming!!
> > :o)
> > >
> > > Timming: A Chinese vase like me?
> >
>
> No, I don't have clay feet.
>
> Centime: One penny time machine.
Confused time-travelling road-mender: "Odd. I'm sure I TARDIS road
tomorrow."
nemo
> > > Amusing: Singing comedian.
> > >
> > > Bemusing: Singing bee poet.
> > >
> > > Ceasing: Singing mermaid.
> > >
> > > Musing: Singing exotic subatomic particle.
> > >
> > > Tracing: Singing flat dish container.
> >
> > Poncing: Singing band of nerve fibres/fibers linking the medulla
oblongata
> > and the cerebellum with the midbrain.
> >
> > Oblongata: Worn by a girl with very funny-shaped legs.
>
> Wincing: Singing in pain.
>
> Fencing: Singing foils.
Épéedural: Takes away a lady swordfighter's labour pains.
nemo
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > Q: What's that guy doing jumping up and down in the corner using
extremely
> > bad language.
> > A: That's swored dancing.
> >
> > Q: Who's that jumping up and down on top of a very old British car.
> > A: That's Morris dancing.
> >
> > Q: What's that map of England doing jumping up and down for?
> > A: That's Country Dancing.
> >
> > Q: Who's that jumping up and down in the corner with no clothes on?
> > A: It's Simon Smith and He's Dancing Bare.
> >
> > Q: What's that guy doing jumping up and down with all his arms and legs
in
> > plaster.
> > A: Break Dancing.
> >
> > I was going to do one about Ballet as well, but it was just tutu
difficult!
>
> Q: What is that armed man with combat fatigues doing jumping?
>
> A: He's Contra dancing.
Is he wearing a 4H Cap too?
nemo
> > > Helmet: Glove of the Devil.
> > >
> > > Lucifer: Fur of the Devil.
> > >
> > > Satan: What the Devil does in the sunlight.
> >
> > Lucifer: Lucille Ball's winter coat.
>
> What kind of coat does a house wear?
>
> A coat of paint.
Narr. A Housecoat!
Dancer who puts on the undercoat: Primer Ballerina.
nemo
> > > Basing: Singing sheep in San Francisco.
> > >
> > > Bashing: Singing sheep.
> > >
> > > Bracing: Singing Ass.
> > >
> > > Dicing: Gambing singer.
> >
> > Wincing: A song of agony sung by a lot of paople here and Bill Gates at
> > seeing these puns again for the umpteenth time.
> >
> > Umpteen: A camel between the ages of 13 and 19.
>
> Canteen: Adolescent container.
Brilliantine: An adolescent genius.
Pomade: Fizzy soft drink made from apples.
nemo
> > >
> > >
> > > nemo wrote:
> > >
> > > > "Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
> > > > > Picking: King of lifting things.
> > > > >
> > > > > Pocking: Acne king.
> > > > >
> > > > > Pucking: Hockey king.
> > > > >
> > > > > Puking: Vomit king.
> > > > >
> > > > > Quaking: Religious pacifist king.
> > > >
> > > > Plucking: Harpo Marx becomes a monarch.
> > >
> > > A Red King?
> > >
> > That's be Karl, you Charlie!
> >
> > Long, thin snow-shoes for horses: Trotskis.
>
> Nucliotides: Tides on a nuetron star.
Narr. They're changes in sea level in Egypt after the country's second queen
was crowned.
nemo
> > >
> > >
> > > "Milton J. Smuthworthy, I" wrote:
> > >
> > > > Then Larry Krzewinski said:
> > > > >On Sun, 25 Jul 2004 14:38:04 -0700, "ynotssor"
<ynot...@example.net>
> > > > >wrote:
> > > > >
> > > > >>"Milton J. Smuthworthy, I" <tonworth...@SexMagnet.com> wrote
in
> > > > >>message news:4103fc24$0$25470$45be...@newscene.com
> > > > >>
> > > > >>> 29 years now? Wow, that *is* quite a camping trip! Hey, you
didn't
> > > > >>> happen to jump out of an airliner with a big bag of cash did
you?
> > > > >>
> > > > >>I can honestly say that I've only made one jump from a Boeing 727
in
> > my
> > > > >>life, and that was from 15,000 ft.
> > > > >
> > > > >So how much of the cash do you have left, D.B.?
> > > >
> > > > And what percentage is he offering for us to keep our mouths shut?
> >
> > You'll starve!
> > >
> > > Will he send it COD?
> > >
> > You won't even be able to eat that!
>
> Eating: Internet bell.
SA Bell: Rang when Nelson Mandela was released.
(It used to be the standard kind of alarm bell used by small fur animals.)
In the old days, a barman was standing there wearing a 'T' Shirt with 'Free
Nelson Mandela' written on it.
A drunk staggered in, saw the shirt and said, 'OK. I'll have ten pints of
this Nelson Mandela!'
nemo
> > >
> > > Allowing: A permissive bird.
> > >
> > > Blowing: A windy bird.
> > >
> > > Growing: Very big wings.
> > >
> > > Harrowing: Risk taking bird.
> > >
> > > Rowing: Bird in a small boat propelled by oars.
> > >
> > > Slowing: Bird that doesn't move very fast.
> > >
> > > Throwing: Bird from the big leagues.
> > >
> > Throwt: Flying gizzard!
>
> Wowing: An amazing bird.
Woowing: The ghost of an owl.
nemo
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > Why would you want to lag a jet?
> >
> > To prevent icing?
>
> Icing: Songs on the Internet.
Or the sound of a Castrato!
nemo
>
> "Cybe R. Wizard" wrote:
>
> > On Tue, 14 Oct 2003 12:20:25 -0700
> > J. A. Mc. <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote:
> >
> > > On Tue, 14 Oct 2003 04:22:29 GMT, Buffalo Chilkat
> > > <mam...@watering.hole> found these unused words floating about:
> > >
> > > >nemo wrote:
> > > >>Hauke Reddmann wrote ..
> > > >>> A Boeing goes to the doctor: "My wings hurt!"
> > > >>> "No wonder, they have ailerons!"
> > > >>Oh no it didn't. It couldn't get into the ruddy elevators!
> > > >
> > > >This is a tall tail.
> > > Much flap about nothing ...
> > >
> > You're right. I would not bank on the difference or my courage might
> > take a nosedive.
>
>
> Stalling: Baby horse housing.
>
> Housing: Indians singing Hello.
Low Cost Community Housing: Lots of them singing 'Hello' for nothing.
nemo
>
>
> "J. A. Mc." wrote:
>
> > On Sun, 21 Sep 2003 16:27:08 -0700, "Nick Bell"
> > <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> found these unused words floating about:
> >
> > >
> > >"J. A. Mc." <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote in message
news:q3bsmv0f1bljm440a...@4ax.com...
> > >|
> > >| >news:GNkbb.93597$B%2.8...@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> > >| >>
> > >| >> Nick Bell <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> > >| >> news:vmpbibb...@corp.supernews.com...
> > >| >> >
> > >| >> >
> > >| >> > There are the descendants of French people in Northern Ireland.
They are
> > >| >> called Ulster Onionists.
> > >| >> >
> > >| >> And they speak Garlic??
> > >| >>
> > >| >> It's the ones in Belgium who cause all the trouble. Slightest bit
of
> > >| >> contraversy and the Walloons go up!
> > >| >>
> > >| >Ouch! Born in Antwerp and never went back.
> > >| >
> > >| Is Antwerp the next worm hole in the Spacewerp?
> > >|
> > >
> > That's an enterprising solution once tried by Holland Oats.
>
> How Quark-y!
How *do* you dye Lithium anyway?
nemo
>
>
> Nehmo Sergheyev wrote:
>
> > I saw a building next the Medical Center with a sign identifying it as
> > the Nursing School. I saw nothing wrong with this until I learned babies
> > know how to nurse without being taught. And worse than that, this school
> > was for adults!
>
> I've often seen ads for Baby Sales, and seen Rash Doors at Kaiser. In
> fact, there is a baby sale going on this week!
>
> Kaiser: German knight.
You ever seen a sign reading, 'Hugh Discounts'?
There are some pretty dumb signwriters about!
nemo
>
> Palema wrote:
>
> > mike wheeELer wrote:
> >
> > > In article <2m6a20pca10fbvl50...@4ax.com>,
> > > jaS...@gbr.online.com, J. A. Mc. was looking at the world oddly when:
> > >
> > >>On 6 Feb 2004 18:46:37 -0800, art...@yahoo.com (artyw) found these
unused
> > >>words floating about:
> > >>
> > >>
> > >>>Palema <pale...@sbcglobal.net> wrote in message
> > >
> > > news:<68SUb.1256$wt.454@newss
> > >
> > >>vr23.news.prodigy.com>...
> > >>
> > >>>>At the White House: We want you to fillmore at home
> > >>>
> > >>>Dont Polk fun at our presidents.
> > >>
> > >>Carter explain?
> > >>
> > >
> > > He say nix on that idea..
> > >
> > Ag knew that would happen!
>
> Spiro: Row of primitive weapons.
Assagai who was a staunch defender of the Vietnam War and made colorful
attacks on war protesters, innit?
What a bastard!
nemo
>
> Curl Ling: A Chinese with bent hair.
>
> Drumming: A percussion Chinese vase.
>
> Goal Lee: Korean who guards the goal.
>
> Pale Line: White Chinese.
>
> Pail Ling: Chinese water container.
Ewer wrong about that.
nemo
>
> Lowing: Bird on the ground.
>
> Mewing, Meowing: Cat-bird.
>
> Mellowing: Bird calming down.
>
> Minnowing: Small flying fish.
>
> Mowing: Bird cutting the grass.
Kaily Minnowgue: A fishy singer who eats cabbage.
nemo
> > >
> > >
> > > "Cybe R. Wizard" wrote:
> > >
> > > > On Tue, 14 Oct 2003 12:20:25 -0700
> > > > J. A. Mc. <jaS...@gbr.online.com> wrote:
> > > >
> > > > > On Tue, 14 Oct 2003 04:22:29 GMT, Buffalo Chilkat
> > > > > <mam...@watering.hole> found these unused words floating about:
> > > > >
> > > > > >nemo wrote:
> > > > > >>Hauke Reddmann wrote ..
> > > > > >>> A Boeing goes to the doctor: "My wings hurt!"
> > > > > >>> "No wonder, they have ailerons!"
> > > > > >>Oh no it didn't. It couldn't get into the ruddy elevators!
> > > > > >
> > > > > >This is a tall tail.
> > > > > Much flap about nothing ...
> > > > >
> > > > You're right. I would not bank on the difference or my courage
might
> > > > take a nosedive.
> > >
> > >
> > > Rowing: Line of birds.
> > >
> > > Towing: Bird foot digits.
> > >
> > > Vowing: Bird oaths.
> > >
> > Curlew: Large migratory shorebird of the sandpiper family.
> >
> > Curfew: Large migratory shorebird of the sandpiper family only now
nearly
> > extinct.
>
> Curling: Baby dog.
Or a game similar to bowls involving baby dogs being skidded along the ice.
nemo
>
> What do jelly babies wear on their feet?
>
> Gum boots.
What do young ladies wear on their feet in wet weather?
Gal-loshes.
nemo
>
> What did the puddle say to the rain?
>
> "Drop in sometime".
What did the alcoholic say to his doctor when the doc discovered a cupboard
full of bottles of Whisky?
"I've got to get a drop in now and again!"
nemo
> > >
> > > "J. A. Mc." wrote:
> > >
> > > > On Sun, 21 Sep 2003 17:06:37 GMT, "J H Lowy" <jhl...@optonline.net>
> > > >
> > > > >news:GNkbb.93597$B%2.8...@news-lhr.blueyonder.co.uk...
> > > > >>
> > > > >> Nick Bell <nicand_n...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> > > > >> news:vmpbibb...@corp.supernews.com...
> > > > >> >
> > > > >> >
> > > > >> > There are the descendants of French people in Northern Ireland.
> > > They are
> > > > >> called Ulster Onionists.
> > > > >> >
> > > > >> And they speak Garlic??
> > > > >>
> > > > >> It's the ones in Belgium who cause all the trouble. Slightest bit
> > > of
> > > > >> contraversy and the Walloons go up!
> > > > >>
> > > > >Ouch! Born in Antwerp and never went back.
> > > > >
> > > > Is Antwerp the next worm hole in the Spacewerp?
> > >
> >
> > Ann Twerp: A silly and contemptible Belgian young lady.
>
> Belgian: A musical gian.
That'll make the Walloons go up!
nemo
> > > > >
> > > > >
> > > > > "J. A. Mc." wrote:
> > > > >
> > > > > > On Mon, 24 May 2004 04:11:49 GMT, "Chris Trask"
> > > > > <chris...@earthlink.net>
> > > > > >
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > >> To be franc, this is nonsense!
> > > > > > >>
> > > > > > >> Shall I pound this message further?
> > > > > > >>
> > > > > > >> Mark my words.
> > > > > > >>
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > I have to peso back and forth to think of something clever
as I
> > > > > have a
> > > > > > >yen to contribute to this thread. I'm a bit lira of running
afoul
> > of
> > > > >
> > > > > > >anyone's sensitivities due to a monetary lapse of
thoughtfulness.
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > But it was still centavo the internet!
> > > > >
> > > > > Lets Buck the trend towards war!
> > > > >
> > > > > Franc ly, I'm sick of Iraq!
> > > > >
> > > > Lets also Buck the trend towards Rogers!
> > >
> > > And Kingham Palace?
> > >
> > anyone wearing clothing made of plaid cloth: Boo! Gingham Palace.
>
> Kingham: The Pork King.
Gingam: The plaid pig.
nemo
> > >
> > > Including the Nazi Prince?
> > >
> > And half the Mitford family!!
>
> Mitford: Glove that crossed the river.
How can a glove upset a river and did all the water come pouring out?
nemo
> > >
> > >
> > > "J. A. Mc." wrote:
> > >
> > > > On Tue, 20 Apr 2004 09:58:04 -0600, "Bill Colmers"
> > > <sambo...@whatever.ca>
> > > > found these unused words floating about:
> > > >
> > > > >
> > > > >news:VuOdnW57yc3...@comcast.com...
> > > > >> Tomorrow, April 20, is Hitler's birthday. I've been invited to a
> > > Nazi
> > > > >party.
> > > > >> It's a white sheet affair.
> > > > >>
> > > > >
> > > > >I though it was like formalwear for Bush's Inauguration: white tie
> > > and brown
> > > > >shirt.
> > > > >
> > > > If you liked that, wait until you see Kerry's choice ... red shirt
> > > with
> > > > yellow stripe ...
> > >
> > > You are calling him a cowardly Communist?
> > >
> > He desserted from the Communist Party when they found out he was a
cowardy
> > custard.
>
> Cowardy: A bovine demon with no courage.
Cowardy Custard: What he has on his Christmas Pudding.
nemo
> > > > > Therapy: A pea you eat to feel better.
> > > > >
> > > > > You are a grape human bean.
> > > >
> > > > A nabsulute bounder got a girl drunk on wine once and then had his
> > wicked
> > > > way with her. She later went to the police station and reported that
> > she'd
> > > > been graped!
> > >
> > > Wicker: Dog on food stamps.
> > >
> > > Wicker: Evil dog.
> > >
> > Wicker Man: Edward Woodward wouldn't!
>
> Whisker: Long thin dog.
>
> Whisper: Price of small light remnant.
That's irrelevmnant.
nemo
>
> Jawing: Talky bird.
>
> Knowing: Smart bird.
>
> Mowing: Flying grass cutter.
>
> Owing: Borrowed bird.
>
> Rowing: Bird in a canoe.
Why is American beer like making love in a canoe?
Because it's two f*cking close to water!
nemo
>
> Easter: Computerized Mixing bowl.
>
> Easter: Spinning religious holiday.
>
> Blowing: Windy bird.
>
> Cowing: Flying bovine. Also known as Red Bull.
>
> Cowtowing: Helping a fallen bovine get up.
An in tractor bull problem!
Eric
nemo <ne...@newtylust.nit> wrote in message
news:VNuxf.108244$D47....@fe3.news.blueyonder.co.uk...
"Tim Bruening" <tsbr...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us> wrote in message
news:43C4B02C...@pop.dcn.davis.ca.us...
>
>
> nemo wrote:
>
> > Every time I come onto this group and see the headers download clock up
> > several hundred new messages, I know it's a case of very bad timming!!
:o)
>
> Timming: A Chinese vase like me?
You have the Timerity to suggest such a thing?