In a Catholic nursing home

[ze...@yahoo.com]

An old Jewish gent was in an old folks home. Every weekend the kids
would visit, and every week it was the same story, Gramps would
whine and plead, "Get me outta here! I hate this place! They're all
dying here and I can't take it anymore!"

Finally, his son spoke up, "Dad, you've been in every place in
town, the only one left is the Catholic place on the east side.
You'd hate it there."

"Get me in!" said the old Jew.

The next weekend they went to visit. The old man was smiling and
happier than they'd seen him in years. "I love it here" he said.
"They're always laughing and joking, everybody's happy, and
everybody's got a nickname."

"A nickname?" the astonished son asked.

"Yeah, see that bald guy over there? Hasn't got a hair on his head
and they call him Curly. And that guy there... must weigh 350
pounds and they call him Tiny. And me... who hasn't had sex in
thirty years... they call me the fu*kin' Jew!"