Werecard Update: Spyder Everhunger
Spyder Everhunger
folks around the bonfire.
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The Werecard of Spyder Everhunger
Human Name - Christopher Allan Brock
Were Name - Spyder Everhunger
Phenotype - Windigowak
Birthdate - January 4th, 1970
Birthplace - Wayne County Hospital just outside Detroit, Michigan
Current Home Territory - Wandering around Utah at the moment without a
fixed address.
Dream Territory - Anyplace where I can live on the fringes of human
society, only interacting with The Flock when I deem it necessary.
The desert would be nice...
Physical Description, Human - Christopher is a white male of Irish
descent, standing around six feet and weighing around one-sixty
you'd guess. His thick hair is a dark, rich brown, cut short in
back and wavy on top, and a goatee the same hue and streaked with
blonde adorns his chin and lip. His dark brown eyes are touched
with hazel streaks. He has a lean build, but not what you'd really
call skinny - as though he never seems to get enough to eat. He's
exercising a lot lately, and is starting to look in shape. Around
his neck hangs a tiny silver dragon's talon clutching a quartz
sphere, suspended from a braided black cord.
Personality, Human - Dark humored, quietly aloof, possessed of drives
even he doesn't fully realize yet. Often thought of as scheming
and is a self-acclaimed evil genius (tongue in cheek.) Willing to
go to any lengths for his success or survival. Rarely likes
children or even most people, but would die protecting the ones he
does care for. Noble and possessing a strong code of ethics, but
not the same code that most people are familiar with.
Physical Description, Were - Spyder is a creature in flux, shifting
and evolving over time and with his mood. He is a chimerical being
about seven feet in height, with a leonine countenance and blazing
crimson eyes deepset in a shadowy brow. His face is pebbled in
tiny black scales with silver glimmers rippling across their
surface. His sweeping, pointed ears taper back through a luxuriant
mane which blends from glistening obsidian to steely tips. A
cavernous maw lined in teeth like ivory knives fills his flat,
flaring, feline muzzle.
Rather than fur, his draconian body is tiled in matte black scales
edged in silver, ranging from the size of dimes to silver dollars.
He possesses four long and slender though muscular arms with the
lower shoulders nestled in the armpits of the upper, with long,
gracefully formed hands tipped in rending claws. A thin,
serpentine tail twines and undulates around his muscular legs and
a duet of immense leathern wings enshroud him like a cloak. His
digitigrade legs are notably equine, thighs ripplingly thick
thewed and ending in jet-black cloven hooves. Both forearms and
back-curved calves are swept in spiny, stiff, quill-like hair
blending black-to-silver like his mane.
Personality, Were - Wickedly barbed wit, loud, abrasive. Basically the
real Christopher without all the hangups, inhibitions, and social
constraints; able to say and do all the things he can't in
'normal' human company. Would still die to protect those he loves,
but would really rather his threatening demeanor be enough.
<<toothy grin>> Nasty, rapacious, voracious... but all around a
fun guy, as long as he doesn't get too hungry...
Human Career - Seeking opportunities even as you read this.
Hobbies/Interests - Reading (fiction, non-fiction, history;) computers
(duh!), LARPing with White Wolf groups, bike riding, hiking,
swimming, cooking.
Favorite Movies - Clerks, Natural Born Killers, Interview with the
Vampire; Wicked City, Akira (Japanese anime)
Favorite Were Movie - Nightbreed, Blood Ties, Gargoyles the Movie
Favorite Authors - H.P. Lovecraft (the Master!) and Clive Barker.
Favorite Were Literature - Cabal, The Wild, Wolfen, The Wolf's Hour,
The Skin Trade, Sins of the Flesh(!)
Favorite Artists - H.R. Giger, Brom
Favorite Were Art - I'm quite impressed with the work of Richard Kane
Ferguson, who has illustrated many of the cards in White Wolf's
"Rage" game.
Favorite Saying/Quote - "If you can't swim, stay out of the deep end
of the gene pool."
Favorite Were Saying/Quote - "I _love_ children... they taste like
chicken!"
Favorite Personal Quote - "My Inner Child is a mean little fucker."
Favorite Bands - Oingo Boingo, INXS, and The The
Favorite Were Songs - "Insanity," "No Spill Blood," & "On The Outside"
by Oingo Boingo; "Sympathy for The Devil" by the Stones; "Eat the
Rich" by Aerosmith (that's a pertinent one!); and "This Is The
Night" by The The.
Favorite Season - Autumn
Favorite Holiday - Hallowe'en (who didn't see that one coming?)
Preferred Prey - Long pig <<big toothy grin>> But anything'll do in a
pinch.
Hunting Tips - Don't let 'em realize you're even there til they hit
the ground, dead.
Preferred Method of Attack - Grabbing prey by shoulder/collar and
tearing out the throat with your teeth... that first rush of
lifeblood is the sweetest.
Favorite Non-Were Mythological Beasts - Dragons, griffins, chimera.
Feelings Toward Vampires - They're almost totally worthless creatures:
they take over your hunting grounds, hunt all your prey, and an
hour after eating one you're hungry again. <<grin>> But I've met a
few worth knowing.
Feelings Toward Normal Humans - 90% are not even aware enough of their
surroundings to be considered sapient; most of the rest prey on
their own kind, beat their loved ones and their own cubs, and are
generally wastes of skin. I'd say maybe 2% of The Flock is
actually worth knowing, but they are few and far between.
Personal Lycanthropy - Even when I was a very small child - and I can
remember back to my first birthday, so I know exactly how long
I've felt this way - I've been different from most of the people
around me. Something inside of me was always striving to be
better, stronger, more worthy of survival than most of the
pathetic human creatures in this world.
I started researching magik, ESP, UFO's and the like when I was about
eight years old... I started reading at two. I've learned many
unusual talents and tricks, but I feel that for the most part,
such things are ust that: parlor tricks. They don't hold the key
to peace of soul. While I still strive towards making that
"evolutionary jump" to transform into my true form - which in many
ways I feel the were form described above truly is - I'm not sure
anymore if those 'tricks' are a part of magik or my wendigo self
manifesting its presence.
And I look on the Beast within me as being my self, not a spirit
guide; it is not some guiding force or 'guardian angel' in my
eyes, but a facet of my own mind, spirit, and soul - if I still
have one of those, that is. <<wink>> I am my own Godhood and my
own Devil through its presence. I make my own miracles and my own
luck.
All through High School I Dreamt of being windigowak, although I
barely realized what I was in the dreams or the significance of
such dreams back then. My dreams often took place in a huge,
futuristic hotel, and I was a towering, clawed and fanged Great
Beast. I even wrote a short story entitled 'Wendigo' in the
setting and character of my Dreams. After high school the dreams
faded as I turned my back on my inner nature to try and be
'responsible' to become a 'normal human being'... the worst years
of my life, looking back on them. I even almost made the mistake
of marrying someone I despised. And I lost the one true love of my
life because that facet which she had fallen in love with had been
buried beneath the veneer of normalcy...
When I was twenty-two, I broke my arm while in Phoenix at an SCA war.
It was a very bad break, very nearly compound, and further
complicated by careless field medics. Surgery was required to set
the bones and to this day I have a metal plate in my forearm
holding the bones in place, although I'm sure my body has mostly
processed the minerals and the whole thing is breaking down:
that's what happened the last time I broke a limb when I was
seven.
After the surgery, I was lying awake one night on the couch: it was
about two in the morning, and my pain medication had worn off. The
pain was excruciating, but I couldn't muster the control to get up
and find more pain pills or to control the pain through subtler
means...
Just then, the moon arced into sight through a window. I pleaded with
the Goddess to help me... the pain was more than I could stand,
and I couldn't concentrate enough to do anything about it myself.
I asked that I be Awakened so that my spirit could give me the
instinct and drive to make it through the next few weeks.
And sure enough, I felt a surge as my reptilian brain was reawakened
and my wendigo self rose through the shit and morass of fear and
self-degradation to take control, roaring in my mind in
exultation! Thereafter, I thrived on the pain of my arm...
whenever it got to be too much, I would laugh and the creature
inside me would revel in the agony.
I didn't realize then what it was that had been called forth, though.
I fact, I hadn't been able to put any kind of tag on it until I
read the FAQ for this group. All I knew about it was that it was
ravenous, seemingly sinister, a true monster; whose power over me
seemed to wax and wane with the phases of the moon, and who
motivated me with it's own soul-devouring hunger... for the flesh,
for sex, and darker urges.
This spirit has always been with me, I now know. The urges, the
hungers... they were all my own. But I'd had such control over it
until that painful, moon-glow night, such tight reins on its dark
whisperings that it had all but given up and died within me. And
true to her nature, the gift of the Goddess is a blessing and a
curse together, balancing good with evil.
Over the last three years I'd come to regain some control over the
Beast, all still unaware of my true inner nature, before finding
AHWW and the rest of my Pack. But I did so through different
methods: instead of sublimating and burying its desires and
appetites, I've integrated it with my own personality. Day by day
we come ever closer to convergence, becoming one soul, one mind,
one hunger. But the repressions of 'normal' society still kept me
in check. It finally took leaving safety and comfort and family to
leap into the unknown and move someplace where I knew almost no
one, so that I could 'rewrite' myself, find my inner workings. And
I know the day is fast approaching when the Beast and I will make
the 'quantum leap of faith' to radically alter my body to become
the monster I long to be in form as well as mind and spirit, and
to satiate its appetites... MY appetites... in _all_ things.
Is that wrong? I don't think so... the Beast, the Windigo spirit I
house is far older than the morals of today. And it fills a vital
role in today's crowded, human-filled world, a role which even
other Shifters seem loath to take. I despise the repressive human
cultures of today which allow the sick to flourish and anyone
different from the status quo to be punished for their supposed
sin. The Flock is in dire need of a culling... I will prey upon
the human predators: the rapists, murderers, and child molesters
which seem to have sprung up in the last two hundred years as
mankind reaches to fill every nook and cranny of this world. I
will prey upon the mad dogs among the innocent. And I will try in
all ways to somehow stop the cancerous growth of the human race
across our mother's surface, to return as much of the wild to The
Wild.
But since by necessity (though I long for the day I no longer have
to!) I still must wear some masks while existing among the Herd,
I've learned other ways to deal with the legendary Hunger of the
windigowak: I can gain as much sustenance from a piece of art or
music, or a day and night of making love to a woman as I can from
any piece of meat... although fresh meat is always welcome! And of
course a wide, breathtaking vista of wilderness can feed my soul
for days on end. The Hunger extends from just hunting and killing
to all manner of things: lusts and appetites as well as the
sometimes cruel beauty of our mother, and there are many ways to
feed the Beast than just the thrill of the kill. Like Jekyll and
Hyde, I can feed on all manner of corruption and debauchery,
violence, and perversion.
The only desire which I cannot fulfill is my loneliness... until I
found the Pack, I thought I was the last and only of my kind,
without even knowing precisely what it was I was the last of! More
than anything else, I seek the kinship and love (if a monster such
as I can ever truly feel that emotion) of another Beast, another
monster such as myself. I've found friends who understand my
nature, but most are still scared off by my habits and hungers.
And while the Pack are my cousins, my brothers and sisters... many
are still afraid of the windigowak... and we _are_ still rare
creatures, even among supernatural creatures such as werewolves,
vampires, and the like. I need the companionship and understanding
of the Pack more than any of The Flock could understand: to be
myself and 'slip off my human skin.' But I still long for
something closer, a bonding union with a particular individual to
help me attain ever higher plateaus in my consciousness. A mate.
Even in the crowd around the Virtual Bonfire, I am still alone.
- Spyder Everhunger, known to some as Christopher
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... "We have had the veils lifted from our eyes, and that is not bad.
We -know- for certain that things are not as they seem. We -know-
that this world is full of dangerous and mysterious powers. That
gives us an advantage..." Whitley Strieber - 'The Wild'
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|"I smell the pain upon the breath | This bad boy's comin' to you |
| of the lost & the lonely... | LIVE and livid from... |
|"I hear the thoughts that whisper | email: spy...@xmission.com |
| in the hearts of all men." | Realtime: Spyder @ FurryMUCK |
| 'Helpline Operator' - The The | & all points due sou'west... |
\-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= WWW: http://www.xmission.com/~spyder/ =-=-=-=-=-=-/