death is such a wonderful thing
Peter harvy
i will be posting some stills on my webpage of the process.
for all those inquisitive people i will post the url once i have
finalised my resting chamber
This will not be a show to miss
Items on the agenda: hydrochloric acid, meat hooks, 12-guage
until then, hope your life is better than what mine has and will be
cat perdu
Personally, I'd like my death to be beautiful.
Bit I'm just a romantic at heart.
-- cat perdu
Remove the cat's MEOW to reply by e-mail.
"Peter harvy" <pha...@online.com.au> wrote in message
news:3a78ecf2...@news.dingoblue.net.au...
Scall
Scall
--
*To be a poet means making a commitment: to embrace the tragedy fate has
chosen for you and fulfill that destiny with gusto and nobility.*
"Peter harvy" <pha...@online.com.au> schrieb im Newsbeitrag
news:3a78ecf2...@news.dingoblue.net.au...
Sandy Herrick
Sandy
Janissary Angel
pha...@online.com.au (Peter harvy) wrote:
> 17hrs and counting until i finally commit suicide
> i will be posting some stills on my webpage of the process.
> for all those inquisitive people i will post the url once i have
> finalised my resting chamber
> This will not be a show to miss
> Items on the agenda: hydrochloric acid, meat hooks, 12-guage
>
Yuck. It will certainly be photo-worthy, but not in the way I want my
end to be. Out of curiosity, are you bothering with a note? I've been
having problems with how I want to write mine.
--
Janissary Angel
"He told me to kill or be killed. Well, I'm still alive."
ICQ # 15272759
(4*arctan(1/5) - arctan(1/239))/4 of Goth
--
Janissary Angel
"He told me to kill or be killed. Well, I'm still alive."
ICQ # 15272759
(4*arctan(1/5) - arctan(1/239))/4 of Goth
Sent via Deja.com
http://www.deja.com/
eraserhead
i've been sitting here for a while (in fact it's been on my mind for most of
the day because i read it earlier)... thinking... goddamn thinking of
something to write. And i can't. This is the first time i've ever come
across anything like this.
the only thing that i can say is please don't let yourself suffer badly. I
wouldn't wish that on anybody, whether they enjoy pain or not. But there is
a difference between pain and suffering.
Death may be a beautiful thing, but suffering isn't, regardless of whether
or not it's by your own hand.
However, it is your choice, and i respect that. i'm not here to change
anyone's mind.
eraserhead
"cat perdu" <cat_pe...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:95c8r3$gdp17$1...@ID-16453.news.dfncis.de...
> Personally, I'd like my death to be beautiful.
>
i seen a film once where a guy said that the same kinds of chemicals were
released during death, as with sex.
cat perdu
enigmatic and keep some secrets to myself. ;)
Although, beauty isn't (to me) necessarily something involving sex. But,
then again, if there's a hungry vampire roaming about somewhere, I wouldn't
say no. I can think of much worse ways to go....
-- cat perdu
Off for a cold shower now...
"eraserhead" <scre...@ravolox.co.uk> wrote in message
news:t7jtjse...@xo.supernews.co.uk...
cat perdu
-- cat perdu
Off to get the popcorn and the belladonna-laced rum.
"Sandy Herrick" <sher...@portjeff.net> wrote in message
news:3A79BE6F...@portjeff.net...
Peter harvy
mutilating suicide. As I was about to do another post on here my cat
came through the window and walked over to me. So it has come to my
attention to get my cat to a loving home, why would i want to hurt
this thing that has brought me so much joy to my life? Give me a day
or two my peverse voyuer comrads as I do this.
For those who think these pictures will depict 'beautiful' scenes, or
even perhaps romantic, I pity you for your misguided believes, There
will be nothing pretty about this. I have tested this acid on my left
arm already. Do you know what happens to flesh under industrial acid?
it bubbles, and then your arm gets infected and gangrenous. to be
honest, im suprised it hasnt fallen off already...
Keep tuned
eraserhead
be beautiful and i just thought i'd mention it, dunno if i would choose that
way to go though - i couldn't see it being pleasant for the other person!
(i'm just too thoughtful that way) Besides i
wouldn't like it if someone killed themselves after being with me!
I guess being bitten would be a beautiful way to go. There is something
sensual and seductive about vampires i guess. Although, I think spiders are
beautiful, but i don't
know if i'd like to die from a
spider bite :)
I have been wondering though, what would be a beautiful way to die? Do you
mean a work-of-art kind of death (dunnon about that myself), or maybe a
satisfying (for you) one? I've
heard that drowning is a very peaceful way to die, for example.
Scall
Seduction in cars, abandoned buildings
Fights at the food stand
motel, money, murder, madness
do you really wanna live for that?
sincerely
Scall
--
*To be a poet means making a commitment: to embrace the tragedy fate has
chosen for you and fulfill that destiny with gusto and nobility.*
"Peter harvy" <pha...@online.com.au> schrieb im Newsbeitrag
news:3a7a5f42....@news.dingoblue.net.au...
cat perdu
water. Maybe I drowned in a past life? [shrugs]
Well, if there were no handy vampires about (which would be my preferred
method), I think I'd choose to die in an aesthetically pleasing
surrounding - music of my choice, a few candles, maybe some burning incense
and I'd go with some suitably strong sleeping pills and booze. That way I
could just fall asleep among the things I love and not wake up.
I'd probably wear my favourite clothes too. And leave instructions that I
should be buried in them.
Yea - that's how I'd do it. No mess, no pain, no ugliness. Just sleep and
peace.
-- cat perdu
"eraserhead" <scre...@ravolox.co.uk> wrote in message
news:t7l56p4...@xo.supernews.co.uk...
Janissary Angel
pha...@online.com.au (Peter harvy) wrote:
> For those who think these pictures will depict 'beautiful' scenes, or
> even perhaps romantic, I pity you for your misguided believes, There
> will be nothing pretty about this. I have tested this acid on my left
> arm already. Do you know what happens to flesh under industrial acid?
> it bubbles, and then your arm gets infected and gangrenous. to be
> honest, im suprised it hasnt fallen off already...
I have no illusions that death is a thing where one falls down and
listens to faint violins while waiting for the angels to come. I've
seen enough corpses and dissected enough to know that's not the case.
Spreading my corporeal matter across the place, though... what a pain
in the arse to clean up. Fascinating idea, though.
eraserhead
does anything i say have any value?). There's just a major cloud of
blackness hovering above my head at the moment. Society put it there. I just
detest some people in this fucking world. (except those i love of course)
How i would do it: i would like to die over a period of time - fuck what i
said earlier. Bleeding to death wouldn't be so bad - tiredness would
eventually creep over you, as the life ebbs out of you. You would probably
start to hallucinate as you go, you may even find out the meaning of life.
The circumstances wouldn't really matter, but i would perhaps do it in an
open field of intensely long grass, on a sunny day, so i could drift away
with no-one near me. (ie. in the next room or whatever!). But it would just
be my luck for a team of tractors to come into the field and start cutting
the grass for sileage! I would prefer for my body to remain intact!
Sometimes, i think it would be such a relief to go. It would be like falling
asleep after a really shitty day, and then not having to get up to face it
all once again.
However, as i die, i would probably feel anger over society's griup on my
life: what right does society have over me, over my soul? In fact what right
does christianity have over my soul? if i was a christian, i would be living
my life full of guilt, knowing that i'm suffering in life, trying to scrape
money together to survive, and then i die and burn for all eternity. What
kind of religion is that? Has anyone in that religion ever considered that
God has given man free will? Yet God also knows what man will do in say
fifty years - is that then free will? Apparently our lives are mapped out
for us by the good lord, and he knows exactly what we're going to do
anywhere at anytime: 'scuse me for noticing, but that is not free will.
We're supposedly to be judged at the end of the world on our free will. That
wouldn't exactly be a fair trial. Do you know what i mean? Thank God (pardon
the expression) i'm not expecting anything on the other side.
anyway, i'm starting to rant again. Certain people put me into a certain
frame of mind in work this evening. But it's not enough for me to end my
life just yet.
so you'll still have to suffer my company ; )
Ali...@snafu.de
have someone here who posted links to pages with images of dead
people.... some of them simply cannot be topped.. believe me. so here
are some strong stomachs... anyway, just think about it realy good...
i'm not the person to say that's a sin, i tried to suicide myself a
couple of years ago... i''m just saying: i'm sorry for you that you
feel miserable.
Alizta
On Fri, 02 Feb 2001 07:24:27 GMT, pha...@online.com.au (Peter harvy)
wrote:
Sandy Herrick
Sandy
Sandy Herrick
Sandy
Death
cat perdu
-- cat
"Death" <DeathDo...@webtv.net> wrote in message
news:11006-3A...@storefull-283.iap.bryant.webtv.net...
> I agree
>
Bryce Roney
many people as you can first.
or drop some acid and look at your life from another angle.
Death Seeker
May I offer my response as someone who was nearly drowned! Although, admittedly, I was not trying to commit suicide, though, at the time, I was recovering from a suicide attempt. Rather, I was being killed!
As it is, I look at death differently than most people in that I see a seriously erotic side to death. Death can be sexy! Ask me about my views on autoeroticism. There is an erotic draw of drowning, but that is the vision of the lifeless nude body of a very attractive woman floating face-up on the surface of the water. The drowning of guys isn't usually seen as sexual. The thing is, guys drown more often than you might think! Although, from my own experience, many guys who do drown are more often than not deliberately held under the water's surface by a second party, and held there until they stop breathing and their heart stops! Then they are left to float
Saying that, please allow me to explain why I view death by drowning as being sexual!
I was nearly drowned myself when I was 22-years-old! It was crazy! At the time, I was living with a guy 2-years my senior, and one thing about him was that he would get rough when it came to things like sex and the like. Again, ask me about my views on eroticism and autoeroticism! One night in early July, 1977, it was one of those hot steamy nights, and we had had this torrential downpour that lasted for several hours. It was after midnight, we were out walking after the storm had stopped. An empty field near us was turned into a shallow lake. It wasn't very deep, but enough to where we took off our clothes and waded in. The deepest part was at the middle and the level was just above our knees. One thing lead to another, and next thing I knew, we were both kneeling in the water, and we began to make out. Then it got crazy! I remember that I sat while he knelt. We kept making out, but then, I don't exactly know what lead to the events that quickly unfolded, but, suddenly, out of the blue, my boyfriend grabbed me and pushed me down until, as he straddled my lower body, I was completely submerged! How did he hold me under the water's surface, aside from straddling my body? He wrapped his hands around my neck and began to strangle me, WHILE I WAS STILL COMPLTETELY SUBMERGED! Several minutes later, I was lying on the shoreline coughing and hacking! He had strangled me until my heart stopped, then he let my body float to the surface. He pulled me out and revived me. He really couldn't explain what suddenly came over him to do exactly what he did, except that he said he suddenly had an uncontrolled urge to experience what it felt like to drown me until I was dead! He said it took less than a minute to basically kill me! I was only gone for maybe 3-minutes before he began CPR, and it took quite an effort, but, what little water that was in my lungs was forced out, my heart began to beat, and I began coughing! The crazy part was that it didn't bother me that he tried to kill me, even when he confessed that he was deliberately trying to! In fact, I would go as far as to say I was seriously disappointed that he didn't leave my body in the water until I was too far beyond the point where I could be revived! It's what happened a few hours later that brought his attempt to kill me into my own reality. It was maybe 8-hours later, and I had been out for a couple of hours. I went for a walk too clear my head and reflect on my boyfriend trying to kill me. When I got back to the apartment, I found him hanged by his neck from the door frame to a hall closet! Was it remorse for trying to kill me? I don't know! All I know is that he was dead, I was still alive, and the whole experience was strangely erotic.
It's like what happened a few years ago around here. There were three young men who found a nice shallow lake, and one evening they decided to see if being under water caused the same effect as having a noose around their necks, as in auto erotic asphyxia. What they found in this lake were some long wooden board, maybe 12-inches by 12-inches by several feet long. It was from an old dock on the lake that had been dumped and left in the water. The board had become very waterlogged and was heavy enough to stay at the bottom of the lake. The board was far enough below the surface, and it had these metal rings mounted into it. What the three did was, after they took their clothes off, then they took the ropes and first, they tied the ropes around one ankle, then they dove under the surface and wrapped the ropes around the rings, then they surfaced. The ropes were long enough that, when they were able to get their heads above the water's surface, they could hold the ropes. They would then go under, but when they did, they would grip the ropes so they could hold the rope with one hand, which was enough to keep them completely submerged, and they could stroke their hard penises with the other hand. All was fine, and when they felt like they were getting overcome by the water, they could release the rope, and it would slip, allowing them to float to the surface before they reached that dangerous point of losing consciousness. Only thing, for two of them, the ropes got tangled and didn't slip! The third young man saw that his friends were in trouble, and went under to try to free the ropes. Unfortunately, he couldn't do it, but rather than leave his two friends to drown, he kept trying to free them. Sadly, the water overtook him. He passed out and he floated face-down to the surface. Someone saw him, pulled him out of the water, and they were able to revive him. By that time, his two friends were already dead. As the two bodies were recovered, the young man who survived confessed that they were experimenting with a theory that drowning can produce the same effect in guys that strangling can. An extreme asphyxia experiment gone seriously bad! Did they did indeed have erections? After my own experience some 35-years previous, I can imagine that having one of their ankles tied so they couldn't float to the surface might be enough to induce a hard-on. And what about ejaculating? When my boyfriend held me under water by strangling me, the strangulation caused me to have an erection! I did ejaculate, but, my boyfriend did say that I didn't go until after I was unconscious. And my erection didn't subside until after he revived me. Oh, that young man who survived the ordeal? A few hours later, he was found dead in his apartment. He had hanged himself (out of remorse for surviving while his two friends died?), and as I understand it, he was hanged in a way that he managed to break his neck!
It makes one think though, doesn't it? That suicide by drowning can be a rather sexy way to end your life! Mind you, with my experience, my death would have been assisted! Still, it wasn't all that bad!
Queer
>
I read your story about drowning, and the thought that suicide by drowning could be just as erotic as suicide by hanging. I too almost died by drowning when I was 19-years-old. Ironically, like you, my near-death by drowning happened just a couple of weeks of me trying to hang myself (for the fourth time since I was 15!). AND!! I had the help of not one boyfriend, but three of my boyfriends. And I was a very willing 'victim' as they tried to drown me. They didn't hold me under the water like your boyfriend did. Unfortunately for me, while my experience did have some erotic overtones, I didn't find it pleasurable in any way. Unlike when I tried to hang myself, it took a long time to lose consciousness. I lost consciousness in less than 10-seconds when I hanged myself. As my friends held me under the water, I struggled for what seemed like an eternity! It took me about 2-minutes before I began to lose consciousness, and almost another minute before I finally succumbed to the water. I was held under for another minute or so before they allowed my body to float to the surface. They pulled my body to the shore and were then able to revive me.
Would I ever consider drowning myself again? No! I would more prefer to have someone slit my throat as deep as possible to try to decapitate me! When I do finally kill myself, and I did try a few weeks ago on New Year's Eve, I will hang myself. It is really the best way to die, especially if I can finally manage to cause my neck to break!
