"Why Sally Ride waited until her death to tell the world she was gay"
Alan Boyle
American Library Association
July 24, 2012
In life, Sally Ride became famous as America's first woman in space —
and in death, she's now added to her fame as the first acknowledged
gay astronaut.
The revelation came in a low-key way: Monday's obituary from Sally
Ride Science, the educational venture she founded a decade ago,
referred to Tam O'Shaughnessy as "her partner of 27 years." A
spokeswoman for Sally Ride Science, Terry McEntee, said Ride and
O'Shaughnessy, who is the company's chief operating officer and
executive vice president, worked out the phrasing of the announcement
before Ride's death.
In an email today, Sally Ride's sister, Bear Ride, explained why the
former astronaut kept quiet about her sexual orientation.
"In her inherent Norwegian reticence — in this and so many aspects of
her personal life (wrestling with pancreatic cancer, for example) —
she just didn't talk much (see Norwegian comment, and add to that the
typical tight-lipped scientist thing)," Bear wrote. "If you read
interviews from years and years back, you'll see that there was always
a major frustration that she didn't comment much on 'how it feels to
be the first American woman in space' — she just didn't think that
way. She wanted to get the job done. Her personal feelings were just
that: personal. Not right or wrong — simply Sally. Everyone who knows
her well really got that about her."
Bear, a gay Presbyterian minister, takes a different approach.
"I'm a rather out-there advocate for LGBT [lesbian-gay-bisexual-
transgender] rights — my partner and I have even been arrested a
couple of times in public protest!" she told me. "But that's me, and
not Sally."
Here's the essay that Bear Ride has been sending around as a tribute
to her sister:
"Sally Ride was the first American woman to go into space and she
was my big sister. Sally died peacefully on July 23rd after a
courageous 17-month battle with pancreatic cancer. I was at her side.
We grew up in Encino, CA. Our parents, Joyce and Dale Ride, encouraged
us to study hard, to do our best and to be anything we wanted to be.
In 1983 Newsweek quoted our father as saying, 'We might have
encouraged, but mostly we just let them explore.' Our parents
encouraged us to be curious, to keep our minds and hearts open and to
respect all persons as children of God. Our parents taught us to
explore, and we did. Sally studied science and I went to seminary. She
became an astronaut and I was ordained as a Presbyterian minister.
"Sally lived her life to the fullest with boundless energy,
curiosity, intelligence, passion, joy, and love. Her integrity was
absolute; her spirit was immeasurable; her approach to life was
fearless. Sally died the same way she lived: without fear. Sally's
signature statement was 'Reach for the Stars.' Surely she did this,
and she blazed a trail for all the rest of us.
"My sister was a very private person. Sally had a very fundamental
sense of privacy, it was just her nature, because we're Norwegians,
through and through. People did not know she had pancreatic cancer,
this is bound to be a huge shock. For 17 months, nobody knew, and
everyone does now. Her memorial fund is going to be in support of
pancreatic cancer.
"Most people did not know that Sally had a wonderfully loving
relationship with Tam O'Shaughnessy for 27 years. Sally never hid her
relationship with Tam. They were partners, business partners in Sally
Ride Science, they wrote books together, and Sally's very close
friends, of course, knew of their love for each other. We consider
Tam a member of our family.
"I hope the pancreatic cancer community is going to be absolutely
thrilled that there's now this advocate that they didn't know about.
And, I hope the GLBT community feels the same. I hope it makes it
easier for kids growing up gay that they know that another one of
their heroes was like them."
Sex has always been a tricky topic for astronauts: In the old days,
they worried that if they didn't conform with the "Right Stuff"
stereotype, they wouldn't be picked for spaceflights. Issues such as
alcohol abuse or marital problems often were swept under the carpet.
Is it any surprise, then, that no active or former astronauts have
publicly announced that they're gay? Michael Cassutt, the author of
"Who's Who in Space," is quoted on Space.com as saying that such an
announcement would be a "career-wrecker."
Men and women have been working together on U.S. spacecraft since
Ride's history-making flight in 1983. Why not straights and gays?
Maybe Sally Ride's low-key way of coming out will represent one small
step toward greater acceptance and acknowledgment of the LGBT
contribution to the space effort. (I'm using the term "gay" here as a
catch-all word for the LGBT community. The fact that Ride was married
to fellow astronaut Steven Hawley from 1982 to 1987 makes it
complicated to categorize Ride's perspective, based on the public
record. And Buzzfeed's Chris Geidner quotes Bear Ride as saying "Sally
didn't use labels.")
====
Sally Ride, the first US woman in space, captured the nation's
imagination with her historic journey into space. NBC's Rehema Ellis
looks back at the intrepid astronaut's life and legacy after she lost
her battle with pancreatic cancer.
"Ride's legacy lives on"
Ride would no doubt be uncomfortable with a public discussion of her
sexuality. She was uncomfortable enough with the celebrity that
surrounded her as the first American woman in space. Based on the
comments from her family and co-workers, Ride's main concern in the
last days of her life was making sure that Sally Ride Science survived
her passing.
"I was very fortunate to spend time with her right before she passed
away," said Karen Flammer, a research physicist at the University of
California at San Diego and one of the founders of Sally Ride Science.
"We were able to talk about what she envisioned for our company, and
our legacy and her legacy."
Ride's status as a former astronaut wasn't uppermost in her mind,
Flammer told me. "Her true passion really was science education, and
inspiring more young people, particularly girls, to follow a career
path in science and technology," she said.
Since Ride's death, Sally Ride Science's donors have confirmed that
they "want to continue funding and supporting our programs," Flammer
said. "The transition will be hard, but we want to keep going as a
tribute to her."
Those programs include science camps as well as global outreach
efforts such as EarthKAM, which lets middle-school students request
pictures of Earth to be taken by a digital camera aboard the
International Space Station. "We've engaged hundreds of thousands of
middle-school students, not only in this country, but around the
world," Flammer said.
A similar program, called MoonKAM, lets kids select targets for
pictures taken by NASA's GRAIL lunar probes.
Flammer said there will be a new chief executive officer for the
company: a woman who has had experience running other educational
companies and "who is going to share all of our passions." However,
Flammer said it's still too early to announce the CEO's name.
And speaking of names, Flammer and her colleagues are looking into
somehow putting Sally Ride's name in space. "Right now, we're in the
process of working with NASA on what types of things we can do in her
honor. ... Her tribute statement always was 'Reach for the Stars.'
That's how she ended the talks she gave to students, or to adults. So
we're keeping that in mind with whatever we come up with."
But the most valuable tribute to her memory will be Sally Ride
Science.
"She never wanted the celebrity status," Flammer told me. "What she
really wanted was for her legacy to continue. This is what she wants
to survive her and live on: her name, and her science education
company."
http://cosmiclog.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/07/24/12933519-why-sally-ride-waited-until-her-death-to-tell-the-world-she-was-gay?lite