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TOTAL wilhelp FORGERY: What's the "T" in Bilbert T. Smellivan's name stand for anyway?

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wil...@ix.netcom.com

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Feb 7, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/7/98
to

----------------------------------------------------------------------
In <34D943...@ix.netcom.com> Bill Palmer <wil...@ix.netcom.com>
writes: [This is a complete technical forgery --Bill Palmer]
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

As I look with disgust at the complete forgery of my
screen name and address, I cannot help but remember how
a number of people thought the partial forgeries were so
cute. I remember how, when a number of misguided parties
tried to howl be down for protesting those "wilhelp" thefts,
the message was that people couldn't be bothered with
hearing about such things, and I was (spare me!) "wasting
bandwidth" for publicly objecting.

Well, compelled to steal like so many thieves are, the wilhelp
parasites did NOT rest content for long with merely partial
forgeries (such as wil...@wilhelp.com, etc.). Subsequently,
now we are back to full, technical forgeries again, just as
we were a few months ago. Those forgeries were never solved;
very regrettably, no one was ever arrested.

I don't want to be cynical, but could it be that since the
thieves and parasites involved noticed that certain grudge-
bearing parties thought the partial "wilhelp" forgeries were
so cute, the "wilhelp" thieves may have concluded that the
same people would find full, technical forgeries (rather
than "mere" forgeries in the moral and ethical sense,
like the others) funny? That is a most unhappy thought,
but I must say I have been given pause to wonder...

Forgery is not funny at all. Not when it is partial
and apparently legal, not when it is complete as with
this particular forgery I am posting notice of here.

I will appreciate it if you report any forgeries
(or possible forgeries) of <wil...@ix.netcom.com>
to me immediately. --Bill Palmer

The material below this line is a complete forgery.
I did not write one word of it. I did not post it.
--Bill Palmer

Begin Text of Forged article:

-------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>The 2-Belo, Power Meower wrote:
>>
>> This just in from James Kirk by direct wire:
>>
>> >In article <6b7j06$f...@bgtnsc03.worldnet.att.net>,
Nostr...@wilhelp.com
>> >says...
>> >>
>> >>On Tue, 03 Feb 1998 10:16:56 -0500, CJC <cat...@wilhelp.com>
wrote:
>> >>
>> >>>The 2-Belo, Power Meower wrote:
>> >>>>
>> >>>> This just in from az...@shpxurnq.com (Azzy) by direct wire:
>> >>>>
>> >>>> >哧衆/\/女M...@ni66erlover.com (Bobby Tendinitis) wrote in article
>> >>>> ><6b6cao$e...@news.enter.net>:
>> >>>>>> Live from Los Angeles CA, it's
the2...@defl.bungmunch.edu.morph.morph.morph
>> >>>>(The 2-Belo, Power
>> >>>> >> Meower)!
>> >>>> >>
>> >>>>>> $ This just in from 哧衆/\/女M...@ni66erlover.com (Bobby
Tendinitis) by direct
>> >>>>wire:
>> >>>> >> $
>> >>>> >> $ >Live from Los Angeles CA, it's the Raoul Xemblinosky
Experience?
>> >>>> >> <rao...@mercury.bungmunch.edu>!
>> >>>> >> $ >
>> >>>> >> $ >$ The 2-Belo, Power Meower wrote:
>> >>>> >> $ >$ >
>> >>>>>> $ >$ > This just in from "usEless lAmer"
<derek....@bigfoot.com> by direct
>> >>>>wire:
>> >>>> >> $ >$ >
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > [cleaned up for your convenience]
>> >>>> >> $ >$ >
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> >> > > >>
>
>> >>>>>> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> >> > > >>
>1. TrailerTrash
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> >> > > >>
>2. TuxBoy
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> >> > > >>
>3. Turdwipe
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> >> > > >>
>4. Troll
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> >> > > >>
>5. Tedious
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> >> > > >>
6. Twinkie
>> >>>>>> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> >> > > >7.
>> >>>>TouretteSyndromE
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> >> > > 8.
Trivial
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> >> > 9.
TwatLeT
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> >> 10.
TinkeRbelL
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> >11.
ThoRaZinE
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >> 12.
ToadLickeR
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> >13.
TesTiCles
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >> 14.
TickEateR
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> >15. TaMpoN
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >> 16. TeatS
>> >>>>>> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> >17. TuBerCuLoSis
(ok, so im
>> >>>>starting to reach here...)
>> >>>>>> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >> 18. ThrombuS [maybe
we're running
>> >>>>out of T's.]
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> >19. Twaddle
[never!!]
>> >>>>>> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>> 20. TenderFooT
[where's my thesaurus?]
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>>21. TiPsY [accurate?]
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >>22. TorcheD [more so?]
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> >23. Tuber
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >> 24. Tapeworm.
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> >25. ThOiGuYeN.
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >> 26. TunaTwaT.
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> >27. Tumor. [can we get to the
magic 100?]
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >> 28. TailGunneR. [I'd be happy
with 50]
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > >29. ToileT. [We can do it! We can
do it!]
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > > 30. Tammy.
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ > 31. Tigger.
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> $ 32. ThE.
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>> 33. TrAnsVESTitE.
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>>34. TrAnSsExUaL.
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ '>35. TitS'N'DickS.
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> $ 36. TestVersioN.
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>> 37. T.
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >'>38. Tammy
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > >39.Thaa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aaT.
>> >>>> >> $ >$ > 40. TripleWhammY [10 more to go]
>> >>>> >> $ >$ 41. ToasT
>> >>>> >> $ >42. TiTTyFucK
>> >>>> >> $ 43. ToT
>> >>>> >> 44. TeRRiTiCklE (Just six more.....)
>> >>>> >45. TerMitE (clealy, sir, this shall be archived in the Hall
of Flame)
>> >>>> 46. TrS-80 (four more, dammit)
>> >>>47. TinKlE.
>> >>48. TwiT (I predict success)
>> >49. Tinker-Toys
>> 50. TheEnD!!!!!
>51. Turd-burglars? ('tis not the end)
>
>Bill Palmer
>wil...@ix.netcom.com


Screw you Bill Palmer

unread,
Feb 7, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/7/98
to

In article <6bgt8v$7...@dfw-ixnews4.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com
says...

>
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> In <34D943...@ix.netcom.com> Bill Palmer <wil...@ix.netcom.com>
> writes: [This is a complete technical forgery --Bill Palmer]
> -----------------------------------------------------------------------
>

I thought it looked like a forgery thanks for confirming that. I will
forward this post to the real wilhelp.

< wasted bandwidth>

> Well, compelled to steal like so many thieves are, the wilhelp
> parasites did NOT rest content for long with merely partial
> forgeries (such as wil...@wilhelp.com, etc.). Subsequently,
> now we are back to full, technical forgeries again, just as
> we were a few months ago. Those forgeries were never solved;
> very regrettably, no one was ever arrested.
>

Arrested for what? Are you going to lock them in a Usenet Jail? Show us a
criminal statute that a Usenet forger violates?

<more waste of bandwidth>

Get real netkook. If you don't want to be forged then quit forging yourself.
Otherwise get PGP and sign your precious articles. I doubt if a forger
could defame you by his actions. It would be a rare talent who could do a
better job of that then you already do. I swear you are doing this for
attention.

[trimmed to the only group that can't object to this nonsense]

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 7, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/7/98
to

With reference to the forgery notice I posted a short while
back under this subject line, I add this posting. Please
note that it is by one of the wilhelp parasites. The
attempt plainly involves demeaning my very reasonable
concerns over being the target of forgers again.

Yet, the ironic thing is, the poster himself is making a
near-forgery of my address, though not a technical one.
Now, as to whether this party is the actual forger, or
simply a pal of his trying to create a smoke screen,
I can't say with one-hundred percent certainty.

I DO consider this new post a very interesting coincidence,
however, with regard to the complete forgery I reported
earlier. The whole thrust of this post is that *I* am
somehow stupid to be victimized by the wilhelp forgers
in the case of the full technical forgery, which
(surprise!) this wilhelp "semi-forger" makes light of!

-----------------------------------------------------------------


In <MPG.f45cd0cd...@nntp.a001.sprintmail.com>


wil...@holtmail.com (Screw you Bill Palmer) writes:
>
>In article <6bgt8v$7...@dfw-ixnews4.ix.netcom.com>,
wil...@ix.netcom.com
>says...
>>
>>

----------------------------------------------------------------------
>> In <34D943...@ix.netcom.com> Bill Palmer <wil...@ix.netcom.com>
>> writes: [This is a complete technical forgery --Bill
Palmer]
>>
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
>>
>

>I thought it looked like a forgery thanks for confirming that. I will
>forward this post to the real wilhelp.
>
>< wasted bandwidth>
>

>> Well, compelled to steal like so many thieves are, the wilhelp
>> parasites did NOT rest content for long with merely partial
>> forgeries (such as wil...@wilhelp.com, etc.). Subsequently,
>> now we are back to full, technical forgeries again, just as
>> we were a few months ago. Those forgeries were never solved;
>> very regrettably, no one was ever arrested.
>>
>

Goin' Nova

unread,
Feb 7, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/7/98
to

In article <6bgt8v$7...@dfw-ixnews4.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com ()
wrote:

<snip>


>
> The material below this line is a complete forgery.
> I did not write one word of it. I did not post it.
> --Bill Palmer

Agreed. It is far to succinct to belong to you.

<snicker>

But, as a point of order, I believe you meant to write:
'The material below the dotted line is a complete forgery.'

Otherwise you're accusing yourself of forgery. <snicker>

Fuckwit.

--
Bill has this pile of a lot of crap, some of it neat crap--but it would be
nice if he would do something more with it, rather than park it off on the
side of Usenet. Unprocessed crap smells, and no-one wants to have to sort
through it.

_Stan Kalisch III
<Pine.SUN.3.96L-rev3_1-10....@crl8.crl.com>

wi1he1p will be Trademarked

unread,
Feb 7, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/7/98
to

In article <6bh219$t...@sjx-ixn4.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com
wrote...

> With reference to the forgery notice I posted a short while
> back under this subject line, I add this posting. Please
> note that it is by one of the wilhelp parasites. The
> attempt plainly involves demeaning my very reasonable
> concerns over being the target of forgers again.
>

As I said so before you only defame yourself.

> Yet, the ironic thing is, the poster himself is making a
> near-forgery of my address, though not a technical one.
> Now, as to whether this party is the actual forger, or
> simply a pal of his trying to create a smoke screen,
> I can't say with one-hundred percent certainty.
>

Near forgery? I can put any thing I please in the from address including
wi1...@ix.netcom.com and it would not be a forgery. You seem to believe
that parody = forgery. If there is no intent to deceive there is no
forgery.

> I DO consider this new post a very interesting coincidence,
> however, with regard to the complete forgery I reported
> earlier. The whole thrust of this post is that *I* am
> somehow stupid to be victimized by the wilhelp forgers
> in the case of the full technical forgery, which
> (surprise!) this wilhelp "semi-forger" makes light of!
>

What the hell is a "semi-forger"? Did I say anything about trucks?

Oh and by the way I have applied for a trademark on wile. When approved
I will require you to stop using my name. Consider this a warning.


<snip>


Fuck head.

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 8, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/8/98
to

In <6bimol$k...@bgtnsc03.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com
("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, recently smoked out of the wooods

again, this time as "Goin' Nova") writes:
>
>In article <6bgt8v$7...@dfw-ixnews4.ix.netcom.com>,
wil...@ix.netcom.com ()
>wrote:
>
><snip>
>>
>> The material below this line is a complete forgery.
>> I did not write one word of it. I did not post it.
>> --Bill Palmer
>
>Agreed. It is far to succinct to belong to you.
>
><snicker> [...]

But of course, Louise-monkey, to a singed sore lose
turned "wilhelp" parasite like you, out-and-out
technical forgery is as much a joke as a the quasi-
forgeries you pull regularly.

Your post gets back to a point I have made all
along: With a certain lowly class of gutless sore
loser--generally a "flame-badass wannabe" such as
yourself, Hausmann, lacking all writing and flaming
talent--ANY cowards' trick is a big jest, be it
false ISP complaining a la Human Leech Kendrick;
massive defamation operations, such as the very
ugly, racist ones YOU favor; general screen name
parasitism; or as in this case, the full, very
blatant name and address forgery you support
as a "joke"!

Of course, you and a few other sore losers popped
up in these same groups right on cue to make light
of my reasonable concerns about the quasi-forgeries
of my screen-name, so why would you not do the same
now that the culprits, very likely including YOU,
Hausmann, have turned to COMPLETE forgeries?

[...]

The rest of Louse-monkey John Hausmann's "forgery is
all a big joke" drivel snipped. Nothing the least
bit funny about forgery, despite these attempts by
sore loser Hausmann and few of his pals to laugh
off their habitual net mischiefmaking and parasitism.

Bill Palmer
alt.genius.bill-palmer
>


WILHELP Ratings

unread,
Feb 8, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/8/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:

[...]

> Yet, the ironic thing is, the poster himself is making a
> near-forgery of my address, though not a technical one.

Exactly. Now shut up.
--
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-M i k e M a c L e n n a n -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

mmaclenn[SHIFT+2]ix.netcom.com defame[SHIFT+2]wilhelp.com

Want fame? Say something stupid to reserve your space below.

Don't bother asking me to "post proof" for my "suspicians";
THAT is the sort of unreasonable request favored by the
"Louse-monkeys" and the "Lousy MacLemons" (providing
they are indeed different crude entities) of the net.

Biil Palmer chiding others for daring to ask him to back up
his arguments in <65acb7$d...@dfw-ixnews9.ix.netcom.com>

Mike MacLennan

unread,
Feb 8, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/8/98
to

Screw you Bill Palmer wrote:

[...]

> [trimmed to the only group that can't object to this nonsense]

Bet me.

Lionel Lauer

unread,
Feb 8, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/8/98
to

Quoth wotan...@netcom.com (Wotan) :

>In article <6bgt8v$7...@dfw-ixnews4.ix.netcom.com>,
> <wil...@ix.netcom.com> wrote while drinking:
>
>
>Hey Palmjob, if it offends you so much, then you will send a copy of the
>forged posting to postm...@merit.net and ab...@merit.net.
>
>Make sure you include all headers of the post.
>
>And don't go ranting about screen name leeches and the like. Just that
>you don't appreciate the forging of your address.
>
>everybody calling themselves wilhelp is one thing. But there is only one
>wil...@ix.netcom.com, and you should not tolerate others using this
>particularl ID.

That's right dammit!

Lionel.
--
W Lionel Lauer - longword@*fnord*.super.zippo.com McQ
. | ,. w , "Some people are alive only because
\|/ \|/ it is illegal to kill them." Perna condita delenda est
---^----^---------------------------------------------------------------

the Raoul ® Xemblinosky Experience

unread,
Feb 8, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/8/98
to

WILHELP Ratings wrote:
>
> wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>
> [...]
>
> > Yet, the ironic thing is, the poster himself is making a
> > near-forgery of my address, though not a technical one.
>
> Exactly. Now shut up.

Clealy, sir, is an invention on the order of "de-facto racist."


- the Raoul Xemblinosky Experience -=-=-=- -- . --- .-- =-=-=-=-=-=-=
a.f.k-m.n "So Raoul, get ready to pack your bags and
alt.flame leave the nose." -- BiiLberT, 1 May 1997
mhm 15x12 "Your days as an UseNet performance artist
FOA/KoB(h) are at a close." -- BiiLberT, 5 Dec 1997
- http://extra.newsguy.com/~shpxurnq/ =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Goin' Nova

unread,
Feb 8, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/8/98
to

In article <6bjrn1$g...@dfw-ixnews11.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com
() wrote:

> In <6bimol$k...@bgtnsc03.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com
> ("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, recently smoked out of the wooods
> again, this time as "Goin' Nova") writes:
> >

> >In article <6bgt8v$7...@dfw-ixnews4.ix.netcom.com>,
> wil...@ix.netcom.com ()
> >wrote:
> >
> ><snip>
> >>
> >> The material below this line is a complete forgery.
> >> I did not write one word of it. I did not post it.
> >> --Bill Palmer
> >
> >Agreed. It is far to succinct to belong to you.
> >

> ><snicker> [...]
>
> But of course, Louise-monkey, to a singed sore lose
> turned "wilhelp" parasite like you, out-and-out
> technical forgery is as much a joke as a the quasi-
> forgeries you pull regularly.
>
> Your post gets back to a point I have made all
> along: With a certain lowly class of gutless sore
> loser--generally a "flame-badass wannabe" such as
> yourself, Hausmann, lacking all writing and flaming
> talent--ANY cowards' trick is a big jest, be it
> false ISP complaining a la Human Leech Kendrick;
> massive defamation operations, such as the very
> ugly, racist ones YOU favor; general screen name
> parasitism; or as in this case, the full, very
> blatant name and address forgery you support
> as a "joke"!
>

No. I agreed it was a forgery, ya fucking moron. But, as you
failed to complain against Gareth's forgeries of Raoul, WHY
THE FUCK SHOULD ANYONE GIVE A FUCK WHEN YOU get forged?
You've already made it quite clear there are rules for you that do
not apply to others. You wanna protest forgeries, and have others
join you? Then protest forgeries of people you don't like. It will
at least soften the impression of your hypocrisy.


> Of course, you and a few other sore losers popped
> up in these same groups right on cue to make light
> of my reasonable concerns about the quasi-forgeries
> of my screen-name, so why would you not do the same
> now that the culprits, very likely including YOU,
> Hausmann, have turned to COMPLETE forgeries?
>

Dangerous words, Palmshit. Shall we enter into discussions with
ab...@netcom.com over your accusations ? I have never forged
anyone nor intend to. Whether or not you believe that is
of little concern to me. After all, you believe you're a "Flame Giant".

> [...]
>
> The rest of Louse-monkey John Hausmann's "forgery is
> all a big joke" drivel snipped. Nothing the least
> bit funny about forgery, despite these attempts by
> sore loser Hausmann and few of his pals to laugh
> off their habitual net mischiefmaking and parasitism.

God. Someone hand me a Kleenex. Palmjob's lament
brings tears to my eyes. <snicker> Poor widdle fuckhead's been
forged. Here's a free clue, Einstein. You're not the first, nor will
you be the last to be forged. Even I have been forged. So wipe
the tear stained clown goop from your face and move on, "moran".

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 8, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/8/98
to

In <6bkvs8$6...@bgtnsc03.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com
("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, recently smoked out of the woods
after cowering under "Goin' Nova") grunts:

>In article <6bjrn1$g...@dfw-ixnews11.ix.netcom.com>,
wil...@ix.netcom.com
>() wrote:
>
>> In <6bimol$k...@bgtnsc03.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com
>> ("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, recently smoked out of the wooods
>> again, this time as "Goin' Nova") writes:
>> >

>> >In article <6bgt8v$7...@dfw-ixnews4.ix.netcom.com>,
>> wil...@ix.netcom.com ()
>> >wrote:
>> >
>> ><snip>
>> >>
>> >> The material below this line is a complete forgery.
>> >> I did not write one word of it. I did not post it.
>> >> --Bill Palmer
>> >
>> >Agreed. It is far to succinct to belong to you.
>> >

I'm not the least bluffed by your threats, Louse-monkey
libel artist. Your mischievous, abusive net-history is well
documented, including your role in any number of net dirty
tricks. I consider you a suspect for very good reasons, and
I make no apology for that.

> I have never forged
>anyone nor intend to.

In other words, you draw a very big line between a
quasi forgery aimed at confusing readers (which is
in itself moral and ethical forgery) and a technical
forgery. Yet, Hausmann, I don't get the impression
that even the technical forgery bothers you at all.
You pop up on this thread to demean my concerns, rather
than to denounce the forgery that led to my posting
the alert.

Therefore, as to my suspicians about you, Hausmann, let's
imagine for a moment that someone's garage has been
burglarized. When the owner is reporting the theft,
a shifty, cowardly individual with a long history of
moral turpitude pops up to ridicule the victim and his
concerns about the theft. Also, this party is known
to have a grudge against the victim. Does it strain
the imagination too much to understand that many people
would consider the spiteful "humorist" a prime suspect?

[By the way, it is interesting to note that in history, forgery
has often been considered one of the worst possible crimes.
In England, for hundreds of years up into the mid-nineteenth
century, forgery would get a felon hanged faster than would
murder or burglary! There seems to be something about the
sneaky, cowardly nature of forgery that makes it especially
contemptible to human beings of normal sensibilities.]

Fact is, if you noticed, Louse-monkey, even a number of my
dedicated flame opponents have registered disgust with this
forgery. Whether they like me or not, at least give
them credit for having the intelligence to understand
that if forging Bill Palmer is a big joke, then forging
everyone else on the net is a big joke too. You,
Hausmann, and a very few others, seem the lack the
brain power and/or the character to make such important
connections.

So far, the only people who have popped up to make light
of the forgeries are you, your "clone" MacLennan, and
Cockroach Roger Williams. How interesting that all
three parties were ALSO key components of the very ugly,
year-long defamation operation against me!

Whether or not you believe that is
>of little concern to me. After all, you believe you're a "Flame
Giant".

That's my "flame arena" name, and winning flame wars
is MY game, Hausman. But, as readers know, I win them
fair and square by writing and posting satires and
parodies in proper flame venues, NOT by sneaking around
behind the newsgroup screens and dirty-tricking my
opponents the way YOU and your sore losing pals
like Kendrick, Cockroach Roger Wemyss, and Pus Bag
Davis favor, Louse-monkey and a few others do. NONE
of you are real flamers; you are simply pretentious,
cowardly dirty-tricks artists giving flaming a
bad name.


>
>> [...]
>>
>> The rest of Louse-monkey John Hausmann's "forgery is
>> all a big joke" drivel snipped. Nothing the least
>> bit funny about forgery, despite these attempts by
>> sore loser Hausmann and few of his pals to laugh
>> off their habitual net mischiefmaking and parasitism.
>
>God. Someone hand me a Kleenex.

And of course, a sore-losing forgery suspect like
John Hausmann WOULD insult everyone named Palmer
on the planet!

Palmjob's lament
>brings tears to my eyes. <snicker> Poor widdle fuckhead's been
>forged.

Big joke isn't it, Louse-monkey? Fact is, your latest
REAL beef is my satirical quiz, "Hausmann or Haussmann"!

But that provides an excellent example of the difference
between an honest flame champion like me and a sore
loser like YOU: *I* WIN by writing and flaming, YOU
seek revenge through net dirty tricks, and when you
don't personally perpetrate the tricks (as you may or
may not have done in the case at hand) you applaud and
make light of the cowardly abuse, thereby creating a
climate where forgery is just dandy, Hausmann. That's
what you are doing here.

Here's a free clue, Einstein. You're not the first, nor will
>you be the last to be forged. Even I have been forged.

The point is, Hausmann, your only complaint against ME is
that I rewarded your attempts at being a "flame-badass" with
toasting after toasting, through some of the most notable
stand-alone articles in flaming history, such as the
original, thread-starting, "The Spankiest Spank Ever
Spanked" and "Hausmann or Haussmann" to name only a
couple of very recent ones.

YOUR response, however, has always involved the same
pattern (almost to a "Pavlovian dog" extent!): After
a particularly painful toasting, you take a belly flop
in the net sewer of cowardly tricks, Hausmann.

Further, when you don't lend a personal hand to those
losers pulling the tricks, you publicly applaud those who
acually commit them, be it Human Leech David Kendrick's
false complaining, or this particular forgery (which,
I hasten to add, is only slightly worse--in the moral
and ethical sense--than the "wilhelp" quasi-forgeries
that you regularly engage in to confuse as many readers
as you possibly can).

Bill Palmer
alt.genius.bill-palmer

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 8, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/8/98
to

In <34DD89...@netcom.com> WILHELP Ratings <wil...@netcom.com>
writes:

This is just exactly the sort of thing I have been
complaining of. A malicious misfit makes light of
a full, technical forgery by creating a quasi-forgery
posting that is almost as egregious (Note that he left
out the "ix"!) as the actual forgery I was objecting
to. Great joke.

The point is, of course, that many readers will be fooled
into thinking that this parasite's quasi-forgery was made
by me, and that's been my point all along about the "wilhelp"
quasi-forgeries. Further, it is interesting to note that
so far, the only people who have seen fit to make light
of my concerns about the recent complete forgeries of my
screen name and address are the "wilhelp" quasi-forgers and
parasites, like MacLennan here.

I'll say it again, forgery--complete or quasi--is no joke.

Bill Palmer
alt.genius.bill-palmer


>
>wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>
>[...]
>
>> Yet, the ironic thing is, the poster himself is making a
>> near-forgery of my address, though not a technical one.
>
>Exactly. Now shut up.

Commander Sheraton

unread,
Feb 8, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/8/98
to

On Sun, 08 Feb 1998 10:37:01 -0600, the Raoul ® Xemblinosky Experience
<rao...@mercury.bungmunch.edu> gave a rousing speech that won
independence for a tiny island nation in the South Pacific. Just
minutes later, this very same person logged into Usenet and wrote:

;WILHELP Ratings wrote:
;>

;> wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
;>
;> [...]
;>
;> > Yet, the ironic thing is, the poster himself is making a
;> > near-forgery of my address, though not a technical one.
;>
;> Exactly. Now shut up.

;
;Clealy, sir, is an invention on the order of "de-facto racist."

Is that the same as a "de-facto fuKKKhead?"

-D

|-------------Commander Wendell B. Sheraton, Meow Meow Navy------------|
| (aka David Rosenfield) |
| PhD - Usenet Military Tactics, MA - Usenet Performance Art, |
| DD - Meowology |
| "Sempre Meow ad infinitum" -Raoul X |
| "Nietzsche is dead" -God http://www.itol.com/~slforbes/david |
|--------------Take out the "beer" in e-mail to reach me---------------|

Gilbert T. Sullivan

unread,
Feb 8, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/8/98
to

Commander Sheraton wrote:
>
> On Sun, 08 Feb 1998 10:37:01 -0600, the Raoul ® Xemblinosky Experience
> <rao...@mercury.bungmunch.edu> gave a rousing speech that won
> independence for a tiny island nation in the South Pacific. Just
> minutes later, this very same person logged into Usenet and wrote:
>
> ;WILHELP Ratings wrote:
> ;>
> ;> wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
> ;>
> ;> [...]
> ;>
> ;> > Yet, the ironic thing is, the poster himself is making a
> ;> > near-forgery of my address, though not a technical one.
> ;>
> ;> Exactly. Now shut up.
> ;
> ;Clealy, sir, is an invention on the order of "de-facto racist."
>
> Is that the same as a "de-facto fuKKKhead?"

Why are you flooding news groups?

--
Reuben King says in:
Message-Id: <MPG.e56cb589...@news.texas.net>

In the words of Ministry: "I don't have a life, I don't even know what
life is! Do you have a life? Every day is my life."
--
In keeping with his drug addiction
Reuben King admits in:Message-ID:
<MPG.ea85e6aa...@news.texas.net
I much prefer a good stiff joint anyday!

<MPG.ee63869e...@news.texas.net>
Nah, I'm a rabid junkie --I'm a menace to
society. I need to be locked up for a very long time.
--
News article:<MPG.f3ad9602...@news.alt.net>
Jan 30, 1998
Reuben said: Yes, I sure am a pussy.
--
Reuben King said in typical KKK fashion:
<MPG.f3c1840f...@news.alt.net>
We're going to shove those pointy white hats up your fat pasty asses..
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
--
Reuben King proves his racism by posting "word up, nigga"
In <MPG.f3535b7b...@news.alt.net>

Goin' Nova

unread,
Feb 8, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/8/98
to

In article <6bl7h5$c...@dfw-ixnews8.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com ()
wrote:

And you are a lying sack-o-shit. You accuse, not by proof,
by insinuation.

> > I have never forged
> >anyone nor intend to.
>
> In other words, you draw a very big line between a
> quasi forgery aimed at confusing readers (which is
> in itself moral and ethical forgery) and a technical
> forgery. Yet, Hausmann, I don't get the impression
> that even the technical forgery bothers you at all.
> You pop up on this thread to demean my concerns, rather
> than to denounce the forgery that led to my posting
> the alert.
>
> Therefore, as to my suspicians about you, Hausmann, let's
> imagine for a moment that someone's garage has been
> burglarized. When the owner is reporting the theft,
> a shifty, cowardly individual with a long history of
> moral turpitude pops up to ridicule the victim and his
> concerns about the theft. Also, this party is known
> to have a grudge against the victim. Does it strain
> the imagination too much to understand that many people
> would consider the spiteful "humorist" a prime suspect?

Fuck you, dickweed. You wanna accuse me of forging you,
knock yourself out. It, much like your usual rants, will get
you nowhere. It will, however, further your position as an
obsessed kook.


>
> [By the way, it is interesting to note that in history, forgery
> has often been considered one of the worst possible crimes.
> In England, for hundreds of years up into the mid-nineteenth
> century, forgery would get a felon hanged faster than would
> murder or burglary! There seems to be something about the
> sneaky, cowardly nature of forgery that makes it especially
> contemptible to human beings of normal sensibilities.]
>
> Fact is, if you noticed, Louse-monkey, even a number of my
> dedicated flame opponents have registered disgust with this
> forgery. Whether they like me or not, at least give
> them credit for having the intelligence to understand
> that if forging Bill Palmer is a big joke, then forging
> everyone else on the net is a big joke too. You,
> Hausmann, and a very few others, seem the lack the
> brain power and/or the character to make such important
> connections.
>
> So far, the only people who have popped up to make light
> of the forgeries are you, your "clone" MacLennan, and
> Cockroach Roger Williams. How interesting that all
> three parties were ALSO key components of the very ugly,
> year-long defamation operation against me!
>

And I say your tears are of crocodile origin. You want me to feel
sorry for your pompous ass being forged? SHow some compassion
for others who have been.

ONE question, WHERE was your outrage when raoul was forged?

You will not answer because, as the Dejanews Archive you're
so proud of will show, you said nothing. And in doing so, gave tacit
approval. FUCK YOU, hypocrite.


<rest of Palmer's shit flushed>

Goin' Nova

unread,
Feb 8, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/8/98
to

In article <6blq08$h...@sjx-ixn4.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com () wrote:

> In <6blmji$k...@bgtnsc02.worldnet.att.net> Wil...@trix.netcom.com (Biil
> Palmer) writes:

> >
> >On 8 Feb 1998 23:27:09 GMT, wil...@ix.netcom.com () wrote:
> >
> >>I'll say it again, forgery--complete or quasi--is no joke.
> >>
> >>Bill Palmer
> >>alt.genius.bill-palmer
> >

> >Is this a complete, or a quasi?
>
> Keeping in mind that--morally and ethically speaking--
> the difference is inconsequential, let's let our readers
> decide.

Translation:

I, Bimbo Biil, have no fucking clue. I haven't yet defined that to suit
my needs.

end translation.

Johnny Reb Hausmann

unread,
Feb 9, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/9/98
to

-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----

NANA* removed, as I will not continue a flame war there and nobody there is
interested in reading PalmerPiles(tm) anyway.


wil...@ix.netcom.com (Some Nameless Poltroon) wrote:

>In <6bkvs8$6...@bgtnsc03.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com
>("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, recently smoked out of the woods
>after cowering under "Goin' Nova")

Smoked out of the woods...how? Because he told you he was Hausmann? Because I
told you he was Hausmann? Because the WHOLE DAMN ALT.FLAME CROWD told you he
was Hausmann?

John Hausmann has been using "Goin' Nova" since well before you started
stinking up the flame groups. It does you no credit that you couldn't figure
it out.


>>No. I agreed it was a forgery, ya fucking moron. But, as you
>>failed to complain against Gareth's forgeries of Raoul, WHY
>>THE FUCK SHOULD ANYONE GIVE A FUCK WHEN YOU get forged?
>>You've already made it quite clear there are rules for you that do
>>not apply to others. You wanna protest forgeries, and have others
>>join you? Then protest forgeries of people you don't like. It will
>>at least soften the impression of your hypocrisy.

And on this point Palmjob was uncharacteristically silent.


>In other words, you draw a very big line between a
>quasi forgery aimed at confusing readers (which is
>in itself moral and ethical forgery) and a technical
>forgery.

Palmjob, I've told you this dozens of times. Others have told you dozens more.
But you seem to have reading comprehension problems, so I'll try to make this
simple.

Palmjob, we do not use "wilhelp" to confuse anyone. We use "wilhelp" to piss
you off. And it is sooooooooo effective!


>Therefore, as to my suspicians about you, Hausmann, let's
>imagine for a moment that someone's garage has been
>burglarized. When the owner is reporting the theft,
>a shifty, cowardly individual with a long history of
>moral turpitude pops up to ridicule the victim and his
>concerns about the theft. Also, this party is known
>to have a grudge against the victim. Does it strain
>the imagination too much to understand that many people
>would consider the spiteful "humorist" a prime suspect?

Maybe not, but to a court of law it would be irrelevant.


>So far, the only people who have popped up to make light
>of the forgeries are you, your "clone" MacLennan, and
>Cockroach Roger Williams.

I'm making light of it too, Palmjob.


>That's my "flame arena" name, and winning flame wars
>is MY game, Hausman.

Palmjob, you've never even *participated* in a flame war, let alone won one.
All you do is whine, whine, whine. You may win whine wars, but you don't stand
a Klansman's chance in Harlem in a flame war.


>NONE
>of you are real flamers; you are simply pretentious,
>cowardly dirty-tricks artists giving flaming a
>bad name.

Dear Pot,

You are black.

Signed, The Kettle.


>And of course, a sore-losing forgery suspect like
>John Hausmann WOULD insult everyone named Palmer
>on the planet!

Palmjob, your very *existence* insults everyone named Palmer.


>Big joke isn't it, Louse-monkey?

Yup.


>The point is, Hausmann, your only complaint against ME is
>that I rewarded your attempts at being a "flame-badass" with
>toasting after toasting,

Too bad you only toast yourself.


>Biil Palmjob
>alt.wanker.biil-palmjob


- --
-----------============<[ Lee Jackson Beauregard ]>============-----------
PGP public key at http://www.smart.net/~rchason/pubkey.asc
Sanford Wallace is a Yankee. YOU figure out my email address.
Delenda est Windoze!

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Version: 2.6.2

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1N7lGyr9f5lY9T4kLQRuVXN4olgOWlUx
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Biil Palmer

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Feb 9, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/9/98
to

On 8 Feb 1998 23:27:09 GMT, wil...@ix.netcom.com () wrote:

>I'll say it again, forgery--complete or quasi--is no joke.
>
>Bill Palmer
>alt.genius.bill-palmer

Is this a complete, or a quasi?

Biil Palmjob
alt.hopeless.biil-palmer

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 9, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/9/98
to

In <6bll63$igg$0...@dosa.alt.net>
wilh...@southland.smart.net.yankee.go.home (Johnny Reb Hausmann)
writes:
>
>-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----
>
>NANA* removed, as I will not continue a flame war there and nobody
there is
>interested in reading PalmerPiles(tm) anyway.
>
>
>wil...@ix.netcom.com (Some Nameless Poltroon) wrote:
>
>>In <6bkvs8$6...@bgtnsc03.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com
>>("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, recently smoked out of the woods
>>after cowering under "Goin' Nova")
>
>Smoked out of the woods...how? Because he told you he was Hausmann?
Because I
>told you he was Hausmann? Because the WHOLE DAMN ALT.FLAME CROWD told
you he
>was Hausmann?
>
>John Hausmann has been using "Goin' Nova" since well before you
started
>stinking up the flame groups. It does you no credit that you couldn't
figure
>it out.
>
>
>>>No. I agreed it was a forgery, ya fucking moron. But, as you
>>>failed to complain against Gareth's forgeries of Raoul, WHY
>>>THE FUCK SHOULD ANYONE GIVE A FUCK WHEN YOU get forged?
>>>You've already made it quite clear there are rules for you that do
>>>not apply to others. You wanna protest forgeries, and have others
>>>join you? Then protest forgeries of people you don't like. It will
>>>at least soften the impression of your hypocrisy.
>
>And on this point Palmjob was uncharacteristically silent.

How absurd. On the basis of some accusations that Person A
has forged Person B (a situation I know nothing of besides
a few allegations I have seen bandied about by notorious
liars) *I* am supposed to refrain from protesting the
out-and-out, complete forgery of ny screen-name and
address! Makes no sense to me.
>
>>In other words, Hausmann, you draw a very big line between
>>a quasi-forgery aimed at confusing readers (which is


>>in itself moral and ethical forgery) and a technical

>>forgery like I protest here. There is no such line to
>>be drawn. Sorry to destroy some smug illusions.


>
>Palmjob, I've told you this dozens of times. Others have told you
dozens more.
>But you seem to have reading comprehension problems, so I'll try to
make this
>simple.
>
>Palmjob, we do not use "wilhelp" to confuse anyone. We use "wilhelp"
to piss
>you off. And it is sooooooooo effective!

Nonsense. FLAMERS use their writing and flaming talents
to "piss people off". Like other talentless "flame-badass
wannabes" you support cowardly tricks like forgery and
you yourself engage in quasi-forgery regularly,
"Beauregard the Vindictive Fake."


>
>
>>Therefore, as to my suspicians about you, Hausmann, let's
>>imagine for a moment that someone's garage has been
>>burglarized. When the owner is reporting the theft,
>>a shifty, cowardly individual with a long history of
>>moral turpitude pops up to ridicule the victim and his
>>concerns about the theft. Also, this party is known
>>to have a grudge against the victim. Does it strain
>>the imagination too much to understand that many people
>>would consider the spiteful "humorist" a prime suspect?
>

>Maybe not, but to a court of law it would be irrelevant.
>
>

>>So far, the only people who have popped up to make light
>>of the forgeries are you, your "clone" MacLennan, and
>>Cockroach Roger Williams.
>

>I'm making light of it too,

Iin which our fake-named phony insults everyone with
the real name Palmer.

>Palmjob.

Of course, "Beauregard the Pseudo". After all, your
resentment for your many toastings finally caused you to
jump on the very ugly racial defamation bandwagon of the
above-named parties. Why then would you not join them
in trying to demean my reasonable concerns over the full
forgery of my screen name and address? After all, your
behavior is perfectly in harmony with your past track-
record as a flame war loser who finally turns to dirty
tricks to try and do what he can't do with writing and
flaming skills, which he totally lacks.

Also, since you are a "wilhelp" quasi-forger yourself,
it is not surprising that you would drool a few lines
to the effect that net-forgery is a big joke. That's
totally self-serving of you, since you are already
up to your ass in net parasitism and quasi-forgery,
"Beauregard the Fraud".

[...]

Bill Palmer
alt.genius.bill-palmer


wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 9, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/9/98
to

In <6blmji$k...@bgtnsc02.worldnet.att.net> Wil...@trix.netcom.com (Biil
Palmer) writes:
>
>On 8 Feb 1998 23:27:09 GMT, wil...@ix.netcom.com () wrote:
>
>>I'll say it again, forgery--complete or quasi--is no joke.
>>
>>Bill Palmer
>>alt.genius.bill-palmer
>
>Is this a complete, or a quasi?

Keeping in mind that--morally and ethically speaking--

John Davis

unread,
Feb 9, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/9/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
: In <6blmji$k...@bgtnsc02.worldnet.att.net> Wil...@trix.netcom.com (Biil

Palmjob, it is obvious you are trolling for attention. Woton told you
exatly how to handle the matter. Did you send a copy of the forgery
including complete headers to abuse at the site the forgery origiated
from? No? Well, to bad, no on else can or will do it for you. If you
won't take the normal steps to defind yourself then you'll just have to
live with it. It has also been pointed out to you that you are not the
first this has happened to. I would venture to say that all of the
regulars in the flame groups, including me, have been forged. We all
handle that sort of thing as a matter of course. If that is beyond your
ability then try and learn something about the medium you polute on a daily
basis. Until you do expect to be harrassed by anyone having a bad hair day.


--
A_A
John Davis (o o) Marcus Tullius Cicero (106-43 BC) observed:
----------oOO-(^)-OOo----------------------------------------------------
~ Democritus maintains that there can be no great poet
without a spite of madness.

Lionel Lauer

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Feb 9, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/9/98
to

Quoth bl...@azzy.blah (Azzy) :

>Wotan wrote in article <wotanEo...@netcom.com>:
>> In article <6blf0d$k...@dfw-ixnews12.ix.netcom.com>,
>> <wil...@ix.netcom.com> wrote while drinking:
>>

>> > Further, it is interesting to note that
>> >so far, the only people who have seen fit to make light
>> >of my concerns about the recent complete forgeries of my
>> >screen name and address are the "wilhelp" quasi-forgers and
>> >parasites, like MacLennan here.
>>

>> Fuck You Palmjob.
>>
>> BTW, wil...@netcom.com is a valid address that anyone can get if YOU do
>> not already have it.
>
>Same with wil...@every-other-isp-in-the-universe.com
>
>I really really hope this whole 'wilhelp' thing is just a joke for
>Palmjob... a longwinded and dumb troll... I really want to think that
>this is what it is.. Anything to keep from accepting the horrid truth
>that there is a living breathing 'human' (arguable) out there who is
>actually this obsessed over something SO outrageous and SO frivilous...
>I want to believe that this isn't possible. I really do.

Sorry, you're out of luck on that on.
He really *does* care about that trivia like that.

Mike MacLennan

unread,
Feb 9, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/9/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>
> In <6bll63$igg$0...@dosa.alt.net>
> wilh...@southland.smart.net.yankee.go.home (Johnny Reb Hausmann)
> writes:
> >
> >-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----
> >
> >NANA* removed, as I will not continue a flame war there and nobody
> there is
> >interested in reading PalmerPiles(tm) anyway.
> >
> >
> >wil...@ix.netcom.com (Some Nameless Poltroon) wrote:
> >
> >>In <6bkvs8$6...@bgtnsc03.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com
> >>("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, recently smoked out of the woods
> >>after cowering under "Goin' Nova")
> >
> >Smoked out of the woods...how? Because he told you he was Hausmann?
> Because I
> >told you he was Hausmann? Because the WHOLE DAMN ALT.FLAME CROWD told
> you he
> >was Hausmann?
> >
> >John Hausmann has been using "Goin' Nova" since well before you
> started
> >stinking up the flame groups. It does you no credit that you couldn't
> figure
> >it out.
> >
> >
> >>>No. I agreed it was a forgery, ya fucking moron. But, as you
> >>>failed to complain against Gareth's forgeries of Raoul, WHY
> >>>THE FUCK SHOULD ANYONE GIVE A FUCK WHEN YOU get forged?
> >>>You've already made it quite clear there are rules for you that do
> >>>not apply to others. You wanna protest forgeries, and have others
> >>>join you? Then protest forgeries of people you don't like. It will
> >>>at least soften the impression of your hypocrisy.
> >
> >And on this point Palmjob was uncharacteristically silent.
>
> How absurd. On the basis of some accusations that Person A
> has forged Person B (a situation I know nothing of besides
> a few allegations I have seen bandied about by notorious
> liars) *I* am supposed to refrain from protesting the
> out-and-out, complete forgery of ny screen-name and
> address! Makes no sense to me.

No, you just aren't supposed to be a hypocrite.

P.S. http://www.dejanews.com

Search for rao...@usa.net

Mike MacLennan

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Feb 9, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/9/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>
> In <34DD89...@netcom.com> WILHELP Ratings <wil...@netcom.com>
> writes:
>
> This is just exactly the sort of thing I have been
> complaining of. A malicious misfit makes light of
> a full, technical forgery by creating a quasi-forgery
> posting that is almost as egregious (Note that he left
> out the "ix"!) as the actual forgery I was objecting
> to. Great joke.

Biil, you miss the point.

The forgery was no joke, and Wotan told you which addresses to complain
to to stop them from occurring in the future. (I hope by the way that
you *did* send copies of those posts to ab...@merit.net). The problem
is you and your endless 'cry wolf' syndrome.

You call satire forgery, you call post edits forgery, you call any post
where the word wilhelp is used forgery. Since none of it is forgery,
nobody comes rushing to your aid, festooned in a shining suit of armor,
atop a white horse.

Poor Billy, alone in the cold.


Now when you have a legitimate complaint, you're likely not to get the
sympathy or attention it deserves. Why? Because you have cried wolf a
little too often. Hell, you should be grateful that Wotan even bothered
to help you at all. I didn't notice you come rushing to his defense
when he was being forged.

Goin' Nova

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Feb 9, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/9/98
to

In article <6boa11$e...@sjx-ixn8.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com () wrote:

> In <6bns2j$h...@dfw-ixnews3.ix.netcom.com> Mike MacLennan
> <defame@wilhelp.*expunge.these.fields*.com> writes:

<snip>

> >I didn't notice you come rushing to his defense
> >when he was being forged.
>

> That's an odd idea, because forging Wotan would likely
> result in most posters getting far FEWER readers than
> they usually have! Most people don't try to attract
> readers by pretending that they are a semi-literate
> mischief maker, after, so your allusion is not very
> appropriate.
>

Oh, so according to Palmjob, their are circumstances where forgery is
acceptable. <snicker> And you wonder why no one rushes to your aid?

> Further, if someone was dirty-trickin' Dumpie, it was
> probably someone HE had dirty-tricked the week before.
> Not that two wrongs make a right. Let me assure
> you, I don't keep tabs on The Dumpster Rodent. When
> he's not in my hair, I am more than happy to forget
> about the little misfit and so--I suspect--is just
> about everyone else.
>
> I have neither used Wotan's name, nor applauded anyone
> else who has. I can think of little that sound worse
> than having something I wrote confused with something
> of Dumpie's. That's the key issue. YOU, conversely,
> are a wilhelp quasi-forger and a parasite who has
> attached yourself to me for quite a while now,
> "MacLennan". Of course, then, you WOULD have a
> lot to say on this thread!

Funny, he was forged right here, in your own little shithole. As was
Raoul. And while you didn't applaud the action, you failed to
condemn it, which, according to the latest Palmjob blather on the
subject, is almost tantamount to being a net criminal.

Most interesting. You might as well visit a tattoo artist and have him
stencil your fucking forehead with "hypocrite" so that those who don't
know you, know you.

CJC

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Feb 9, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/9/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>
> In <6bns2j$h...@dfw-ixnews3.ix.netcom.com> Mike MacLennan
> <defame@wilhelp.*expunge.these.fields*.com> writes:
>
> Where did you find the "wilhelp", MacLemon?

> >
> >wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
> >>
> >> In <34DD89...@netcom.com> WILHELP Ratings <wil...@netcom.com>
> >> writes:
> >>
> >> This is just exactly the sort of thing I have been
> >> complaining of. A malicious misfit makes light of
> >> a full, technical forgery by creating a quasi-forgery
> >> posting that is almost as egregious (Note that he left
> >> out the "ix"!) as the actual forgery I was objecting
> >> to. Great joke.
> >
> >Biil, you miss the point.
>
> Not at all. Fact is, you try to obfuscate the point as
> usual with your devious blather, Lousy.

> >
> >The forgery was no joke, and Wotan told you which addresses to
> complain
> >to to stop them from occurring in the future. (I hope by the way that
> >you *did* send copies of those posts to ab...@merit.net). The problem
> >is you and your endless 'cry wolf' syndrome.
>
> Nope, I haven't been "crying wolf" at all. I have in
> fact posted irrefutable evidence that readers are being
> deceived by "wilhelp" quasi-forgeries into thinking I
> worte things I didn't.

No, Biil.

If an article written by a "wilhelp" does not want to make one slash
his wrists, you did not write it. If a post written by a "wilhelp"
does not make someone do an Ian Curtis, you did not write it. We
are crystal clear on that issue.

[biilshit flushed]

--
FLAMING already has too many prattling non-entities trying to tell US--
and the wired world in general--what's going on in flaming when they
themselves haven't the foggiest notion. - Biil Palmjob accurately
describing himself in <69r0cl$5...@dfw-ixnews5.ix.netcom.com>

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 9, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/9/98
to
> <wil...@ix.netcom.com> wrote:
>
>>Further, it is interesting to note that
>>so far, the only people who have seen fit to make light
>>of my concerns about the recent complete forgeries of my
>>screen name and address are the "wilhelp" quasi-forgers
>>and parasites, like MacLennan here.
>
>Fuck You

And of course, the famous Dumpster Rodent insults
everyone named Palmer:

Palmjob.
>
>BTW, wil...@netcom.com is a valid address that anyone can get if YOU
do
>not already have it.

Listen, Wotan, you malicious little liar. The forgery that
I was complianing about as a "full forgery" was "wilhelp@ix.
netcom.com". The others I carefully pointed out as being
quasi-forgeries, and they certainly are that, even if YOU
need to look up the meaning of "quasi". "Quasi-forgery"
is the precise term for something like "wil...@netcom.com"
and that is EXACTLY what I will continue to denounce it as.

Further, I'm of no mind to sit around and split hairs with
lowly, dishonest sorts such as yourself, Dumpie. Oh, you
made some squeaks suggesting that you were upset about the
forgeries, but I suspected you weren't sincere. In fact,
you are by nature INCAPABLE of sincerity, Wotan. It would
be easier for a cat to learn ice skating than for you to be
sincere.

Anyway, whether YOU like it or not, *I* will continue to consider
any use of "wilhelp" (that plainly aims at confusing the readers)
to be parasitical and a moral and ethical forgery, at least. I
scarcely need advice from The Dumpster Rodent on that.
>
>--
>Love is sentimental measles.

Bill Palmer
Creator and proprietor of wilhelp
alt.genius.bill-palmer


wil...@ix.netcom.com

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Feb 10, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/10/98
to

In <6bns2j$h...@dfw-ixnews3.ix.netcom.com> Mike MacLennan
<defame@wilhelp.*expunge.these.fields*.com> writes:

Where did you find the "wilhelp", MacLemon?
>
>wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>>
>> In <34DD89...@netcom.com> WILHELP Ratings <wil...@netcom.com>
>> writes:
>>
>> This is just exactly the sort of thing I have been
>> complaining of. A malicious misfit makes light of
>> a full, technical forgery by creating a quasi-forgery
>> posting that is almost as egregious (Note that he left
>> out the "ix"!) as the actual forgery I was objecting
>> to. Great joke.
>
>Biil, you miss the point.

Not at all. Fact is, you try to obfuscate the point as
usual with your devious blather, Lousy.
>
>The forgery was no joke, and Wotan told you which addresses to
complain
>to to stop them from occurring in the future. (I hope by the way that
>you *did* send copies of those posts to ab...@merit.net). The problem
>is you and your endless 'cry wolf' syndrome.

Nope, I haven't been "crying wolf" at all. I have in
fact posted irrefutable evidence that readers are being
deceived by "wilhelp" quasi-forgeries into thinking I

worte things I didn't. My reasonable objections are
scarcely "crying wolf", either. But then, as one of
my personal "wilhelp" parasites, YOU are not exactly
neutral here, "MacLennan."

>
>You call satire forgery, you call post edits forgery,

I certainly don't call "post edits" per se, forgery.
I myself advocate the correction of typos and other
things that will needlessly distract the reader (in
our OWN text ONLY, of course. However, I do hold
that is wrong to make alterations in the text of
OTHERS when we are quoting them. I think most
readers agree with me.

you call any post
>where the word wilhelp is used forgery.

Hold on, you are getting carried off with your self-serving
blather, "MacLennan". Your message here would seem to be
that every sort of quasi-forgery is dandy, EXCEPT the full,
technical forgery of my screen name and address right down
to the "ix".

I disagree, of course, as the victim of both full and quasi-
forgeries.

For one thing, I have already posted evidence of what many
people know all along: That many readers are deceived by
the quasi-forgeries into thinking I wrote articles I did
not write.

In the protest article I posted a couple of weeks back for
instance, I showed how a longtime Usenet poster was tricked
by a quasi-forgery into thinking I wrote something that
looked nothing like something I would in fact write.

Now, if an old Usenet hand who has read many of my posts is
so deceived, how many newbies (and "old-bies") are likely
also fooled?

All along, Human Leech David Kendrick's little ploy
has been to insist, "Well, only an idiot would be
deceived into thinking one of the fake 'wilhelp'
posts was written by Bill Palmer." Of course, that
is merely the self-serving drool of a parasite.

How many people can argue with a straight face that
a great many readers would not be deceived into thinking
that an article bearing the screen name <wilhelp@netcom.
com> was written by me? (My screen name is, of course,
wil...@ix.netcom.com.) OF COURSE many intelligent
people would be fooled by the quasi-forgery.

And as to your "satire" drivel, that does not wash
either, Lousy. That is as self-serving and illogical
as the rest of your blather.

If someone used "wilhelp" once or twice in articles where
the person was trying to do one of the many imitations of
my style that have been posted, that's one thing.

But that is not the case at all. Parasites such
as yourself are simply using "wilhelp" to make a
connection with me in the minds of the readers,
Lousy. That's all.

You are a leech, and all the other "wilhelp" imitators
are leeches too. Hell, I have seen them use "wilhelp"
in groups where I don't post, and in articles having
nothing at all to do with me.

It is simply a case of some human leeches without a
lick of talent or pride trying to get reader attention
by associating themselves with a famous net writer.
You know it, and just about everyone else knows it too,
"MacLennan".

Admit it, Lousy. Just look in your mirror and
come to grips with the truth that you are looking
at a human leech who has been wasting a lot
time trying to ridicule his unwilling "host"
while attempting to justify his own parasitism.


Since none of it is forgery,
>nobody comes rushing to your aid, festooned in a shining suit of
armor,
>atop a white horse.
>
>Poor Billy, alone in the cold.
>
>
>Now when you have a legitimate complaint, you're likely not to get the
>sympathy or attention it deserves. Why? Because you have cried wolf
a
>little too often.

Take that as coming from a famous "Bill Palmer's parasite"
and a "wilhelp" quasi-forger! MacLemon's scarcely a
disinterested party in the matter, I must say.

In other words, to Lousy MacLennan, here, I am crying "wolf"
when I object to a quasi-forgery like the "wil...@netcom.com"!

Hell, you should be grateful that Wotan even bothered
>to help you at all.

Dumpie made a few show-offy squeaks on the matter, true.
But like, you, he holds that quasi-forgeries such as
"wil...@netcom.com" are just dandy. As the victim
of the quasi-forgeries--who has seen massive and
irrefutable evidence that readers are in fact being
fooled--I can tell you I was not much impressed with
to see Wotan's dumpster-abode begin filling up with
crocodile tears.

>I didn't notice you come rushing to his defense
>when he was being forged.

That's an odd idea, because forging Wotan would likely
result in most posters getting far FEWER readers than
they usually have! Most people don't try to attract
readers by pretending that they are a semi-literate
mischief maker, after, so your allusion is not very
appropriate.

Further, if someone was dirty-trickin' Dumpie, it was

probably someone HE had dirty-tricked the week before.
Not that two wrongs make a right. Let me assure
you, I don't keep tabs on The Dumpster Rodent. When
he's not in my hair, I am more than happy to forget
about the little misfit and so--I suspect--is just
about everyone else.

I have neither used Wotan's name, nor applauded anyone
else who has. I can think of little that sound worse
than having something I wrote confused with something
of Dumpie's. That's the key issue. YOU, conversely,
are a wilhelp quasi-forger and a parasite who has
attached yourself to me for quite a while now,
"MacLennan". Of course, then, you WOULD have a
lot to say on this thread!

On the other hand, nobody has ever accused ME of using
anyone's name for a satire, let alone of taking the name
of a prominent writer and using it regularly in order to
associate myself with the person and deceive readers
on a regular basis. Quasi-forgeries practiced
habitually and aimed at deceiving readers are
every bit as reprehensible as complete forgeries.

wilhelp
alt.genius.bill-palmer


The 2-Belo (May the Meow Be With You)

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Feb 10, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/10/98
to

This just in from wil...@ix.netcom.com () by direct wire:

>In <6bns2j$h...@dfw-ixnews3.ix.netcom.com> Mike MacLennan
><defame@wilhelp.*expunge.these.fields*.com> writes:
>
>Where did you find the "wilhelp

Biil, PLEASE... give it a REST.

[Followups set.]


--


MEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOWMEOW
EOWM The 2-Belo EOWM
OWME the2belo@wilhelp!com OWME
WMEO http://www2s.biglobe.ne.jp/~the2belo/ WMEO
MEOWMEOWALTFLAMEALTFANKARLMALDENNOSEALTLIFESUCKSMEOWMEOW
CASHP #32-97

"Why don't you tell everybody why you're not allowed
in the Untied States [sic]?"

- Gilbert T. Sullivan, in
<6bliq2$9...@bgtnsc03.worldnet.att.net>:
God Bless Ameriericjdnckjq!


wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 10, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/10/98
to

In <34DFCA...@wilhelp.com> CJC <cat...@wilhelp.com> writes:
>No, Biil.
>
>If an article written by a "wilhelp" does not want to make one slash
>his wrists, you did not write it. If a post written by a "wilhelp"
>does not make someone do an Ian Curtis, you did not write it. We
>are crystal clear on that issue.

Wait, let me get this straight. YOU are a good writer,
I am not. That's why YOU have parasitically attached yourself
to ME by appropriating the screen name that Human Leech David
Kendrick registered as a domain name (in imitation of the
"wilhelp" creation that I had made famous with my writing
efforts long before Human Leech Kendrick showed up and began
his quasi-forgeries which led to YOUR quasi-forgeries).

Great writers like you and Human Leech Kendrick ALWAYS make
a point of parasitically attaching yourselves to "bad writers"
like me, right? And no doubt you are hiding behind the
pseudonym "Catfish" because you are really Norman Mailer
pretending to be a lousy writer and a leech for obscure
reasons of his own. Right?

Bill Palmer
alt.genius.bill-palmer


wil...@ix.netcom.com

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Feb 10, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/10/98
to

In <6bodd5$2...@bgtnsc02.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com
("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, Quasi-forger and parasite, recently
smoked out of the woods as "Goin' Nova") grunts:

Where did you get the "wilhelp" Louse-monkey? I mean,
who created it and made it famous for a couple of years
before Human Leech Kendrick--and then YOU--began the
quasi-forgeries to attach yourselves to me?


>
>In article <6boa11$e...@sjx-ixn8.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com
() wrote:
>

>> In <6bns2j$h...@dfw-ixnews3.ix.netcom.com> Mike MacLennan
>> <defame@wilhelp.*expunge.these.fields*.com> writes:
>

><snip>


>
>> >I didn't notice you come rushing to his defense
>> >when he was being forged.
>>
>> That's an odd idea, because forging Wotan would likely
>> result in most posters getting far FEWER readers than
>> they usually have! Most people don't try to attract
>> readers by pretending that they are a semi-literate
>> mischief maker, after, so your allusion is not very
>> appropriate.
>>
>

>Oh, so according to Palmjob, their are circumstances where forgery is
>acceptable. <snicker> And you wonder why no one rushes to your aid?
>

>> Further, if someone was dirty-trickin' Dumpie, it was
>> probably someone HE had dirty-tricked the week before.
>> Not that two wrongs make a right. Let me assure
>> you, I don't keep tabs on The Dumpster Rodent. When
>> he's not in my hair, I am more than happy to forget
>> about the little misfit and so--I suspect--is just
>> about everyone else.
>>
>> I have neither used Wotan's name, nor applauded anyone
>> else who has. I can think of little that sound worse
>> than having something I wrote confused with something
>> of Dumpie's. That's the key issue. YOU, conversely,
>> are a wilhelp quasi-forger and a parasite who has
>> attached yourself to me for quite a while now,
>> "MacLennan". Of course, then, you WOULD have a
>> lot to say on this thread!

My, my, how the quasi-forging Louse-monkey can spew
the red herrings! He continues to suggest that *I*
should not object to being forged and quasi-forged
by leeches such as himself, because, after all, in
a totally different case Person A forged Person B
and the "all-knowing, all-powerful" Bill Palmer
did nothing to stop it! It makes no sense, and
Louse-monkey is famous for not making sense in a
an accusing fashion to throw an opponent off guard.


>
>Funny, he was forged right here, in your own little shithole.

What the hell are you jabbering about now, Louse-monkey?
Are you suggestion that because I am a regular in a
newsgroup, I am supposed to know when someone other than
myself is being forged by unknown parties?

As was
>Raoul. And while you didn't applaud the action,

No, I didn't. But when *I* was forged YOU certainly applauded
the action, you foul leech. Further, there is one other very
big issue you are trying to shuck and jive your way around.

I had no association with this forgery, since I have NEVER
taken anything morally and ethically belonging to Wotan
or Xemblinosky. I never used their names nor quasi-forged
them or anyone else.

On the other hand, YOU are one of MY leading parasites,
Louse-monkey, and that makes all the difference. You think
that because you can't be arrested, that your parasitism
will go unnoticed. It won't, you drooling bloodsucker.

I created "wilhelp" and made it famous for two and one
half years before human leech David Kendrick began
stealing it (several months before he claims to have
registered "wilhelp" as a domain name). You, in
imitation of Kendrick, also began to use "wilhelp"
to tighten your leech-like connection to me, your
unwilling host, Louse-monkey.

you failed to
>condemn it, which, according to the latest Palmjob blather on the
>subject, is almost tantamount to being a net criminal.

Nonsense. YOU are one of MY biggest and foulest parasites,
Louse-monkey Hausmann.

the Raoul Xemblinosky Experience

unread,
Feb 10, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/10/98
to
> >No, Biil.
> >
> >If an article written by a "wilhelp" does not want to make one slash
> >his wrists, you did not write it. If a post written by a "wilhelp"
> >does not make someone do an Ian Curtis, you did not write it. We
> >are crystal clear on that issue.
>
> Wait, let me get this straight. YOU are a good writer,
> I am not. That's why YOU have parasitically attached yourself
> to ME by appropriating the screen name that Human Leech David
> Kendrick registered as a domain name (in imitation of the
> "wilhelp" creation that I had made famous with my writing
> efforts long before Human Leech Kendrick showed up and began
> his quasi-forgeries which led to YOUR quasi-forgeries).
>
> Great writers like you and Human Leech Kendrick ALWAYS make
> a point of parasitically attaching yourselves to "bad writers"
> like me, right? And no doubt you are hiding behind the
> pseudonym "Catfish" because you are really Norman Mailer
> pretending to be a lousy writer and a leech for obscure
> reasons of his own. Right?

Norman Mailer already is a leech and a lousy writer. Whereas
"Catfish" is actually Chris Carrell, UseNet Performance Artist.

HTH HAND FOAD M.


- the Raoul Xemblinosky Experience -=-=-=- -- . --- .-- =-=-=-=-=-=-=

a.f.k-m.n "They (people?) have a right to have you removed
alt.flame from their drives. You don't own them."
mhm 15x12 - Stan Kalisch III, UDP Artist
FOA/KoB(h) 13 February 1997
- http://extra.newsguy.com/~shpxurnq/ =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Lionel Lauer

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Feb 10, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/10/98
to

Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :

>In <6bns2j$h...@dfw-ixnews3.ix.netcom.com> Mike MacLennan
><defame@wilhelp.*expunge.these.fields*.com> writes:
>
>Where did you find the "wilhelp", MacLemon?
>>
>>wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:

The same place that I found mine, HTH.
[min-boggleing amount of stuff snipped]

Mike MacLennan

unread,
Feb 10, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/10/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:

> Wait, let me get this straight. YOU are a good writer,
> I am not.

And they said you couldn't be taught.

Mike MacLennan

unread,
Feb 10, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/10/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>
> In <6bns2j$h...@dfw-ixnews3.ix.netcom.com> Mike MacLennan
> <defame@wilhelp.*expunge.these.fields*.com> writes:
>
> Where did you find the "wilhelp", MacLemon?

From its registered owner, David Kendrick.


> >
> >wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
> >>
> >> In <34DD89...@netcom.com> WILHELP Ratings <wil...@netcom.com>
> >> writes:
> >>
> >> This is just exactly the sort of thing I have been
> >> complaining of. A malicious misfit makes light of
> >> a full, technical forgery by creating a quasi-forgery
> >> posting that is almost as egregious (Note that he left
> >> out the "ix"!) as the actual forgery I was objecting
> >> to. Great joke.
> >
> >Biil, you miss the point.
>
> Not at all. Fact is, you try to obfuscate the point as
> usual with your devious blather, Lousy.

Really? How so?


> >
> >The forgery was no joke, and Wotan told you which addresses to
> complain
> >to to stop them from occurring in the future. (I hope by the way that
> >you *did* send copies of those posts to ab...@merit.net). The problem
> >is you and your endless 'cry wolf' syndrome.
>
> Nope, I haven't been "crying wolf" at all.

Biil, the first time someone used wilhelp@* (not ix.netcom.com) you ran
to these groups, as well as alt.journalism and alt.wired to complain
about.........


[drum roll]

Forgery.


When you were told that it wasn't forgery, you started with your "moral
and ethical theivery" argument, and since nobody was buying into that,
you have since tried your hand at the (semi/pseudo/quasi) forgery angle,
hoping that you can find someone to muster up the same righteous
indignation as yourself.


Sounds a bit like crying wolf to me.

> I have in
> fact posted irrefutable evidence that readers are being
> deceived by "wilhelp" quasi-forgeries into thinking I
> worte things I didn't.

You've shown that Legion was decieved. That's reader, singular. And he
seems to have learned from his error. If there is still any confusion,
he is more than welcome to check dejanews, search for wilhelp@* and
quickly learn the difference between David Kendrick and Bill Palmer.


If any confusion remains I can gladly show Legion, or anyone else you
may dredge up, the threads where Kendrick announced his intention to buy
wilhelp.com, where he bought wilhelp.com, and of course to
http://www.wilhelp.com.


> My reasonable objections are
> scarcely "crying wolf", either. But then, as one of
> my personal "wilhelp" parasites, YOU are not exactly
> neutral here, "MacLennan."

It is crying wolf when you claim non-forgeries to be forgeries.
Period. From here on out you have reduced the impact of your
accusations, even if true. How many people who may have once helped you
are going to either plonk you entirely, or simply skip any thread with
your name and the word "forgery" in it?

Quite a few.

They've seen you screaming about this before, they've politely explained
what real forgery is and what can be done about it, and why nothing is
going to be done about someone posting as wil...@someisp.com. Since
you obstinately refuse to listen to anyone (believe it or not NANA* has
dealt with these cases before, they know what they're talking about
regarding forgery) and flame anyone who tells you that it's not forgery.


> >
> >You call satire forgery, you call post edits forgery,
>
> I certainly don't call "post edits" per se, forgery.
> I myself advocate the correction of typos and other
> things that will needlessly distract the reader (in
> our OWN text ONLY, of course. However, I do hold
> that is wrong to make alterations in the text of
> OTHERS when we are quoting them. I think most
> readers agree with me.

I don't. This is why we have dejanews, reference.com, and the
references line in our headers.


>
> you call any post
> >where the word wilhelp is used forgery.
>
> Hold on, you are getting carried off with your self-serving
> blather, "MacLennan". Your message here would seem to be
> that every sort of quasi-forgery is dandy, EXCEPT the full,
> technical forgery of my screen name and address right down
> to the "ix".

I have no feelings for it regarding its dandiness or lack thereof. I do
know that it's not forgery, nor criminal impersonation. Spare me the
argument about moral and/or ethical thievery, too please. Morals and
ethics are subjective. You have a strict, albeit glass house ensconced,
moral code. I have none.


>
> I disagree, of course, as the victim of both full and quasi-
> forgeries.

I agree with you as far as full forgeries go, Biil. Cancel 'em and fire
off a nastygram to the offending ISP. As far as your "quasi-forgery"
complaint goes, I imagine that you know quite well where I'm going to
tell you to stick it.


>
> For one thing, I have already posted evidence of what many
> people know all along: That many readers are deceived by
> the quasi-forgeries into thinking I wrote articles I did
> not write.

Again one poster, who had not posted in alt.flame for the better part of
a year was confused once. Please provide examples of someone else being
confused about who Biil Palmer is.


>
> In the protest article I posted a couple of weeks back for
> instance, I showed how a longtime Usenet poster was tricked
> by a quasi-forgery into thinking I wrote something that
> looked nothing like something I would in fact write.

There's one. Who else Biil?


>
> Now, if an old Usenet hand who has read many of my posts is
> so deceived, how many newbies (and "old-bies") are likely
> also fooled?

So far......one. Unless you can repost someone else saying "which
wilhelp is Bill Palmer", or saying "shut up, Palmjob" to Kendrick, or
something similar.


>
> All along, Human Leech David Kendrick's little ploy
> has been to insist, "Well, only an idiot would be
> deceived into thinking one of the fake 'wilhelp'
> posts was written by Bill Palmer." Of course, that
> is merely the self-serving drool of a parasite.

Or perhaps Legion is a)a bit careless when reading b)one of these
aforemnetioned idiots c) all of the above.


>
> How many people can argue with a straight face that
> a great many readers would not be deceived into thinking
> that an article bearing the screen name <wilhelp@netcom.
> com> was written by me?

Well, let's see. I didn't alter my reply to line, my organization line,
my .sig and I used the Denver dial-up number rather than the LA one.
Couple that with the fact that anyone who's read you knows that you
wouldn't be able to fire out post one from a shell account, and I'd say
that I fooled oh.... roughly nobody.


>
>(My screen name is, of course,
> wil...@ix.netcom.com.) OF COURSE many intelligent
> people would be fooled by the quasi-forgery.

Odd then that I haven't seen anyone claim to be confused. Again, post
proof that 1. Someone thought that I was you, and 2. That he/she is
intelligent.


>
> And as to your "satire" drivel, that does not wash
> either, Lousy. That is as self-serving and illogical
> as the rest of your blather.

Then arrest the cast of Saturday Night Live at once! Many intelligent
peolple will think that Will Farell is Janet Reno. Why there'll be
rioting in the streets I tell ya!


>
> If someone used "wilhelp" once or twice in articles where
> the person was trying to do one of the many imitations of
> my style that have been posted, that's one thing.
>
> But that is not the case at all. Parasites such
> as yourself are simply using "wilhelp" to make a
> connection with me in the minds of the readers,
> Lousy. That's all.

Biil, for the 1,222,794th time: THERE ARE NO READERS. The only people
who read 99% of my interactions with you are alt.flame regulars, and
they've already made up their minds about me.


>
> You are a leech, and all the other "wilhelp" imitators
> are leeches too. Hell, I have seen them use "wilhelp"
> in groups where I don't post, and in articles having
> nothing at all to do with me.

Because it is a valid domain, with valid accounts. Biil, I really can
recieve e-mail sent to def...@wilhelp.com. It's existance is designed
to irk you, it's use merely secondary.


>
> It is simply a case of some human leeches without a
> lick of talent or pride trying to get reader attention
> by associating themselves with a famous net writer.
> You know it, and just about everyone else knows it too,
> "MacLennan".

Really? Who?

>
> Admit it, Lousy. Just look in your mirror and
> come to grips with the truth that you are looking
> at a human leech who has been wasting a lot
> time trying to ridicule his unwilling "host"
> while attempting to justify his own parasitism.

No, I waste a lot of time ridiculing a stubborn, long-winded no-talent
hack who prefers style over substance, innuendo over facts, and
sensationalistic, alarmist panic over rational thought.


I'm okay with this however.


>
> Since none of it is forgery,
> >nobody comes rushing to your aid, festooned in a shining suit of
> armor,
> >atop a white horse.
> >
> >Poor Billy, alone in the cold.
> >
> >
> >Now when you have a legitimate complaint, you're likely not to get the
> >sympathy or attention it deserves. Why? Because you have cried wolf
> a
> >little too often.
>
> Take that as coming from a famous "Bill Palmer's parasite"
> and a "wilhelp" quasi-forger! MacLemon's scarcely a
> disinterested party in the matter, I must say.

No, if I were disinterested, I would ignore this thread. I'm interested
because I like to see a fairly on-topic NANA hierarchy.


>
> In other words, to Lousy MacLennan, here, I am crying "wolf"
> when I object to a quasi-forgery like the "wil...@netcom.com"!
>

Yes.

> Hell, you should be grateful that Wotan even bothered
> >to help you at all.
>
> Dumpie made a few show-offy squeaks on the matter, true.
> But like, you, he holds that quasi-forgeries such as

> "wil...@netcom.com" are just dandy.....


Bill, I'm cutting the rest because you just repeat yourself. If you
can't find any post besides Legion's where someone was confused as to
who Bill Palmer was, stop talking as though wilhelp.com has altered
space and time.

Mike MacLennan

unread,
Feb 10, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/10/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>
> In <6bqgba$g...@dfw-ixnews12.ix.netcom.com> Mike MacLennan
> I every sound reason to be upset by the actual forgeries,
> AND by the quasi-forgeries which plainy are deceiving
> readers as much as the full forgeries, leech "MacLennan".

You not!

> >
> >Biil, the first time someone used wilhelp@* (not ix.netcom.com) you
> ran
> >to these groups, as well as alt.journalism and alt.wired to complain
> >about.........
> >
> >
> >[drum roll]
> >
> >Forgery.
> >
> >
> >When you were told that it wasn't forgery, you started with your
> "moral
> >and ethical theivery" argument, and since nobody was buying into that,
> >you have since tried your hand at the (semi/pseudo/quasi) forgery
> angle,
> >hoping that you can find someone to muster up the same righteous
> >indignation as yourself.
> >
> >
> >Sounds a bit like crying wolf to me.
> >
> >> I have in
> >> fact posted irrefutable evidence that readers are being
> >> deceived by "wilhelp" quasi-forgeries into thinking I
> >> worte things I didn't.
> >
> >You've shown that Legion was decieved. That's reader, singular. And
> he
> >seems to have learned from his error. If there is still any
> confusion,
> >he is more than welcome to check dejanews, search for wilhelp@* and
> >quickly learn the difference between David Kendrick and Bill Palmer.
>

> You've just proven my point, parasite. If an old net-hand
> like "Legion" has to check Dejanews to find out whether I
> wrote something or not, then common sense suggests plenty
> of people are in fact being fooled.

Again....how so? Legion was away from Usenet for a year, and was fooled
but once. I asked you to show the bajillions of confused readers out
there. Where are they?


> Not only "newbies",
> either; most of us are not inclined--while reading
> newsgroup messages--to run to Dejanews to see if a
> poster is authentic.


Then use your "cute little GUI newsreader" to click on the references
then. Hell, all three of my newsreaders can do it, and two of them are
Netscrape and Micro$oft products. What's your excuse?

> That's hardly a part of the
> normal "newgroup reading pattern, MacLemon,

Really? Are you sure that you read the flame groups toi which you post
Biil?

> so your
> self-serving "quasi-forgery is okay, since I, "Wilhelp"
> parasite MacLennan, enjoy it" arguement falls flat.


Please read any thread involving TJ MIller and Roger Wiseman or INVICTUS
from 12/96 to 8/97.


> >
> >
> >If any confusion remains I can gladly show Legion, or anyone else you
> >may dredge up, the threads where Kendrick announced his intention to
> buy
> >wilhelp.com, where he bought wilhelp.com,
>

> When you buy a domain name you get a domain name. That's all.


You asked where I got the 'wilhelp'. I answered. Now kindly go fuck
yourself.

> It is debatable whether he could even keep THAT if I challenged
> Kendrick legally down the road,

No.

> since I have plenty of record
> of his publicly stated mischievious motives for his parasitical
> imitation of my famous creation. The courts tend to take a dim
> view of things that are done for purely malicious purposes,
> most ESPECIALLY when the harmful intentions are stated in
> writing many times in a public forum.

And your proof of owning 'wilhelp' resides exactly where?


>
> and of course to
> >http://www.wilhelp.com.
>

> That means nothing at all, other than making Human Leech
> Kendrick's "wilhelp" parasitism certifiable.


Proof please.

> Dejanews
> records make it very clear that Human Leech David Kendrick
> appeared on many threads with me LONG before he started
> stealing my "wilhelp."

I used wilhelp from 1995-1997 in X-no-archive:yes posts. Prove me
wrong.


You can't. Dejanews is not going to be admitted in a court of law.


> Further, Dejanews also shows that
> our quasi-forger used "wilhelp" for several months before
> he claims to have registered it as his domain name in
> imitation of my creation, so I am not the least shy about
> calling him a leech and parasite.


Again, I used wilhelp in x-no-archive:yes posts from 1995-97. Prove me
wrong.

You seem to not understand the concept of "burden of proof" (since you
snipped every other arguemnet I've made, I'll assume that this is still
the one you think can win). If you sue David R. Kendrick, you must, via
a preponderance of the evidence, prove that you own wilhelp. If all you
have is Usenet, you lose. Period. You have no Tax ID, you have no
governmental verification, you have nothing.


You can scream about Dejanews all you like, but there is one little
character string that is going to leave you defending yourself from a
countersuit. That character string?

X-no-archive:yes


Have a nice day.

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 11, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/11/98
to

In <6bqgba$g...@dfw-ixnews12.ix.netcom.com> Mike MacLennan
<defame@wilhelp.*expunge.these.fields*.com> writes:
>

I every sound reason to be upset by the actual forgeries,

AND by the quasi-forgeries which plainy are deceiving
readers as much as the full forgeries, leech "MacLennan".
>

>Biil, the first time someone used wilhelp@* (not ix.netcom.com) you
ran
>to these groups, as well as alt.journalism and alt.wired to complain
>about.........
>
>
>[drum roll]
>
>Forgery.
>
>
>When you were told that it wasn't forgery, you started with your
"moral
>and ethical theivery" argument, and since nobody was buying into that,
>you have since tried your hand at the (semi/pseudo/quasi) forgery
angle,
>hoping that you can find someone to muster up the same righteous
>indignation as yourself.
>
>
>Sounds a bit like crying wolf to me.
>
>> I have in
>> fact posted irrefutable evidence that readers are being
>> deceived by "wilhelp" quasi-forgeries into thinking I
>> worte things I didn't.
>
>You've shown that Legion was decieved. That's reader, singular. And
he
>seems to have learned from his error. If there is still any
confusion,
>he is more than welcome to check dejanews, search for wilhelp@* and
>quickly learn the difference between David Kendrick and Bill Palmer.

You've just proven my point, parasite. If an old net-hand


like "Legion" has to check Dejanews to find out whether I
wrote something or not, then common sense suggests plenty

of people are in fact being fooled. Not only "newbies",


either; most of us are not inclined--while reading
newsgroup messages--to run to Dejanews to see if a

poster is authentic. That's hardly a part of the
normal "newgroup reading pattern, MacLemon, so your


self-serving "quasi-forgery is okay, since I, "Wilhelp"
parasite MacLennan, enjoy it" arguement falls flat.
>
>

>If any confusion remains I can gladly show Legion, or anyone else you
>may dredge up, the threads where Kendrick announced his intention to
buy
>wilhelp.com, where he bought wilhelp.com,

When you buy a domain name you get a domain name. That's all.

It is debatable whether he could even keep THAT if I challenged

Kendrick legally down the road, since I have plenty of record


of his publicly stated mischievious motives for his parasitical
imitation of my famous creation. The courts tend to take a dim
view of things that are done for purely malicious purposes,
most ESPECIALLY when the harmful intentions are stated in
writing many times in a public forum.

and of course to
>http://www.wilhelp.com.

That means nothing at all, other than making Human Leech
Kendrick's "wilhelp" parasitism certifiable. Dejanews


records make it very clear that Human Leech David Kendrick
appeared on many threads with me LONG before he started

stealing my "wilhelp." Further, Dejanews also shows that


our quasi-forger used "wilhelp" for several months before
he claims to have registered it as his domain name in
imitation of my creation, so I am not the least shy about

calling him a leech and parasite. It's not like anyone
had any illusions about kendrick's coincidentially coming
up with "wilhelp" on his own!

As to your blather about the typical newsgroup reader having
to do Dejanews searches, though that's more more drivel!
Doing that is fine for the Stan Kalishes of the world, but
to the average reader, it's a waste of time. It's certainly
not part of their normal habits when they are reading newsgroup
postings for their own amusement.

It happens like this: Readers see "wilhelp" and begin to read
an article thinking I wrote it. It's my "wilhelp" which attracts
them, and you parasites are well-aware of that, "MacLennan".

Of course, since it it your own lack of talent and accomplishment
that has caused you to turn parasite in the first place, "Mike",
many of those readers will soon realize they are reading a crude
fake.

Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
they identify with "wilhelp". This category of readers will
think I wrote the parasite's drivel. They will simply not read
any more "wilhelps". THAT'S what upsets me the most about the
thing.

Before Human Leech David Kendrick started the "wilhelp"
parastism epidemic, "wilhelp" was always synonymous with
amusing writing. That's how I made my creation the-or
certainly ONE of the--most recognizeable names on the net.
But then, leech "MacLennan", who would know that better
than you?

(Of course, the "wilhelp" parasites will deny that;
it's a rare human leech who does not try to wriggle out
of responsibility for his actions--even though the fake
"wilhelp" may be visible at the top of his post as he
blathers his dishonest and illogical defense!)

[The rest of leech "MacLennan"'s feeble and dishonest attempt
to rationalize his parasitism and quasi-forgery snipped as
merel representing additional repetitious, self-serving
blather drooled by one of my famous "wilhelp" leeches.]

[...]

--------------------------------------------------------

Keep clickin' on the AUTHENTIC 'wilhelp', folks!
Avoid shabby imitations.

----------------------------------------------------------


Bill Palmer
alt.genius.bill-palmer


Franz Schwarz

unread,
Feb 11, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/11/98
to

Who are those people who have stolen the Wilhelp name, my good sir?

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 11, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/11/98
to

In <6brg1p$b...@dfw-ixnews12.ix.netcom.com> Parasite Mike MacLennan
<defame@wilhelp.*expunge.these.fields*.com> writes: [...]

Fruther illogical drivel from "wilhelp" parasite and
quasi-forger "MacLennan" trying hard to justify his
leech-like behavior.

Forgery isn't a joke; neither is any quasi-forgery
aimed at deceiving readers.


>
>> >> Where did you find the "wilhelp", MacLemon?

[...]

>> >> >> This is just exactly the sort of thing I have been
>> >> >> complaining of. A malicious misfit makes light of
>> >> >> a full, technical forgery by creating a quasi-forgery
>> >> >> posting that is almost as egregious (Note that he left
>> >> >> out the "ix"!) as the actual forgery I was objecting

>> >> >> to. Great joke, MacLennan.

>> I every sound reason to be upset by the actual forgeries,
>> AND by the quasi-forgeries which plainy are deceiving
>> readers as much as the full forgeries, leech "MacLennan".
> >

>> >> I have in
>> >> fact posted irrefutable evidence that readers are being
>> >> deceived by "wilhelp" quasi-forgeries into thinking I

>> >> wrote things I didn't.

[...]

>> >You've shown that Legion was decieved. That's reader, singular.

Not at all. Many readers are fooled, at lewast to the point
of starting to read the drivel of you and your fellow parasites.
That of course has been your intentions all along. You can sit
here and argue that lots of people would not mistake an address
of <wil...@netcom.com> for me, for instance, but I know better.

And
>> he
>> >seems to have learned from his error. If there is still any
>> confusion,
>> >he is more than welcome to check dejanews, search for wilhelp@* and
>> >quickly learn the difference between David Kendrick and Bill
Palmer.
>>

>> You've just proven my point, parasite Mike. If an old net-hand


>> like "Legion" has to check Dejanews to find out whether I
>> wrote something or not, then common sense suggests plenty
>> of people are in fact being fooled.

>> Not only "newbies",


>> either; most of us are not inclined--while reading
>> newsgroup messages--to run to Dejanews to see if a
>> poster is authentic.
> >

>> >If any confusion remains I can gladly show Legion, or anyone else
you
>> >may dredge up, the threads where Kendrick announced his intention

>> When you buy a domain name you get a domain name. That's all.
>
>
>You asked where I got the 'wilhelp'. I answered.

You got it from Human Leech Kendrick who claims to have
registered it with the malicious intent of depriving me
of some of my rights and privileges of ownership of my
creation. He's a parasite and so are you, MacLennan.

>Now kindly go fuck
>yourself.

Gosh, it almost sounds like *I* have be following YOU
around as YOUR parasite, imitating YOUR famous screen
name and so on, Leech MacLennan. Wouldn't be jumbling
the situation up in your mind, would you?


>
>> It is debatable whether he could even keep THAT if I challenged

>> Kendrick legally down the road, since I have plenty of record


>> of his publicly stated mischievious motives for his parasitical
>> imitation of my famous creation. The courts tend to take a dim
>> view of things that are done for purely malicious purposes,
>> most ESPECIALLY when the harmful intentions are stated in
>> writing many times in a public forum.
>
>And your proof of owning 'wilhelp' resides exactly where?

Of course, proof rests in the fact that I was the first one in
Usenet to use wilhelp in all the newsgroups where I made it
famous. Further, simply the fact that I made my wilhelp
creation famous (as documented by the thousands of follow-ups
by others to my wilhelp articles) demonstrates my ownership
of my creation for several years running. After all,
in all the time I was using "wilhelp" in my copyrighted
expressions, such as "Keep clickin' on wilhelp, folks!"
not one person challenged my ownership of my famous
creation. Another way of saying it, wilhelp is part
of my copyrighted persona as a writer, and the courts
have ruled that personas are in fact copyrightable.


>>
>> and of course to
>> >http://www.wilhelp.com.
>>
>> That means nothing at all, other than making Human Leech
>> Kendrick's "wilhelp" parasitism certifiable.

>Proof please.
>
>> Dejanews
>> records make it very clear that Human Leech David Kendrick
>> appeared on many threads with me LONG before he started
>> stealing my "wilhelp."
>
>I used wilhelp from 1995-1997 in X-no-archive:yes posts. Prove me
>wrong.
>You can't. Dejanews is not going to be admitted in a court of law.

Stupidist arugment in the world! The net is full of
potential witnesses, people who might not even be fans
of mine but who would, if subpeoned, tell the truth
to get you behind bars as a perjurer--IF you EVER went
into court with such a baldfaced lie, Parasite MacLennan.

Dejanews is only ONE means of verifying my claim on
my "wilhelp" creation. There are a good many others.

>> Further, Dejanews also shows that David Kendrick,
>> our quasi-forger, used "wilhelp" for several months BEFORE


>> he claims to have registered it as his domain name in
>> imitation of my creation, so I am not the least shy about
>> calling him a leech and parasite.

{snip....More drivel from Parasite "MacLennan" trying to argue
that his perjured testimony would get him other than a stiff
prison sentence--if he actually went into a court of law
with the same fibs about my famous "wilhelp" creation
that he has blathered here. And "MacLennan", I would
be sure to be there personally to applaud as they
dragged you away; I don't like parasites and quasi-
forgers like you any better than full forgers.
That you play around with the idea of perjury publicly
here tells me you might someday commit it; if you haven't
already.]

kjetil miasmusson

unread,
Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

Lionel Lauer wrote:
>
> Quoth bl...@azzy.blah (Azzy) :
>
> >Wotan wrote in article <wotanEo...@netcom.com>:
> >> In article <6blf0d$k...@dfw-ixnews12.ix.netcom.com>,
> >> <wil...@ix.netcom.com> wrote while drinking:

> >>
> >> > Further, it is interesting to note that
> >> >so far, the only people who have seen fit to make light
> >> >of my concerns about the recent complete forgeries of my
> >> >screen name and address are the "wilhelp" quasi-forgers and
> >> >parasites, like MacLennan here.
> >>
> >> Fuck You Palmjob.

> >>
> >> BTW, wil...@netcom.com is a valid address that anyone can get if YOU do
> >> not already have it.
> >
> >Same with wil...@every-other-isp-in-the-universe.com
> >
> >I really really hope this whole 'wilhelp' thing is just a joke for
> >Palmjob... a longwinded and dumb troll... I really want to think that
> >this is what it is.. Anything to keep from accepting the horrid truth
> >that there is a living breathing 'human' (arguable) out there who is
> >actually this obsessed over something SO outrageous and SO frivilous...
> >I want to believe that this isn't possible. I really do.
>
> Sorry, you're out of luck on that on.
> He really *does* care about that trivia like that.
>

Who is this wilhelp person we are taliking about?

-----kjetil


Lionel Lauer

unread,
Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :

>Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
>writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom

*blink*

Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.

Lionel.
--
W Lionel Lauer - Now demunged for your emailing pleasure.

Roger Williams

unread,
Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

Lionel Lauer <nos...@sexzilla.net> wrote:
> Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :

> >Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
> >writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom

> *blink*

> Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.

Steve Boursy. And vice versa.

--
"On top of that, there are a great many people who
enjoy reading Steve Boursy's articles. I am but
one of them."

Biil Palmjob getting his knees dirty in msg ID
<68flmo$i...@dfw-ixnews6.ix.netcom.com>

Lionel Lauer

unread,
Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

Quoth kjetil miasmusson <mia...@wanax.se> :

*Shhhhhhh!* If you're very lucky, he won't tell you.

<tiptoes quietly away from the thread...>

wil...@penis.com

unread,
Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

In article <3501c14e...@news.bungmunch.edu>,

the2belo@wilhelp!com wrote:
>
> This just in from wil...@ix.netcom.com () by direct wire:
>
> >In <6bns2j$h...@dfw-ixnews3.ix.netcom.com> Mike MacLennan
> ><defame@wilhelp.*expunge.these.fields*.com> writes:
> >
> >Where did you find the "wilhelp
>
> Biil, PLEASE... give it a REST.
>

Listen you crespucular cretin, I demand to know where you found
that wilhelp ov mine. Its my intellectual property, not to be
abused by parasites unfit to be vomited upon by roaches, unlike
yours truly. *SMAK*SMAK*SMEK*

--->no footer<--->lsl labs<--->no footer<--->lsl labs<---

-------------------==== Posted via Deja News ====-----------------------
http://www.dejanews.com/ Search, Read, Post to Usenet

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

In <34e84215...@enews.newsguy.com> nos...@sexzilla.net (Lionel
Lauer) writes:
>
>Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :

>
>>Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
>>writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
>
>*blink*
>
>Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.

Bitterness, Lionel, it will eat your heart out sooner
or later. Fact is, I don't need to "name" anyone who
"wants to read my stuff". If you will start checking
through Dejanews, you will find irrefutable evidence of
literally several thousand people who not only have
"read my stuff" but have followed me up.

Based on conventional means of estimating ratios for
"readers-to-followers-up", that indicates many, many
thousands of people read my articles regularly. On
the other hand, if you want to think that people would
pass up a twenty new "wilhelps" to read one "genuine
Lionel", you are welcome to your own illusions.

By the way, the fact that I never heard of YOU until
YOU followed ME up on this thread says something too.
Only please spare me the weasly, "I don't read you, I
just follow you up." I know better. It's an excuse
of the feeble and it insults the intelligence. I mean,
hey, let's ALL start following up people we don't read,
just to "improve the newsgroup chaos"! Right, Lionel?

Lional Lauer
Under wilhelp power,
Can't help but lookin'
Just to see what's cookin'...

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

In <6bu0td$f...@enews1.newsguy.com> Cockroach Roger Wemyss

<rog...@shell1.tiac.net> aka "Cockroach Roger Williams" writes:
>
>Lionel Lauer <nos...@sexzilla.net> wrote:
>> Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
>
>> >Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
>> >writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
>
>> *blink*
>
>> Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
>
> Steve Boursy. And vice versa.

Cockroach Roger Wemyss (aka Cockroach Roger Wemyss) certainly
gives every indication of being a big reader of mine. He has
followed up my original articles on countless occasions, and
he often posts on threads that *I* start. Further, he has
frequently boasted of having a website dedicated to me.

Conversely, it is rarely, if ever, that I have followed up an
original "thread-starter" by Roach Rog. Rog currently ranks
as one of the top five "Bill Palmer's parasites". It is
unlikely that he EVER misses a post by me, despite his
whines.

Bill Palmer
alt.genius.bill-palmer

wil...@ix.netcom.com

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Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

In <34E26F...@wanax.se> kjetil miasmusson <mia...@wanax.se>
writes:

See Dejanews for "Facts in the Case of Bill Palmer".
>
>-----kjetil

wilhelp
alt.genius.bill-palmer


wil...@ix.netcom.com

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Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
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In <34ed9420...@enews.newsguy.com> nos...@sexzilla.net (Lionel
Lauer) writes:
>
>Quoth kjetil miasmusson <mia...@wanax.se> :

>
>>Lionel Lauer wrote:
>>>
>>> Quoth bl...@azzy.blah (Azzy) :
>>>
>>> >Wotan wrote in article <wotanEo...@netcom.com>:
>>> >> In article <6blf0d$k...@dfw-ixnews12.ix.netcom.com>,
>>> >> <wil...@ix.netcom.com> wrote while drinking:
>>> >>
>>> >> > Further, it is interesting to note that
>>> >> >so far, the only people who have seen fit to make light
>>> >> >of my concerns about the recent complete forgeries of my
>>> >> >screen name and address are the "wilhelp" quasi-forgers and
>>> >> >parasites, like MacLennan here.

>>> >> BTW, wil...@netcom.com is a valid address that anyone can get


if YOU do
>>> >> not already have it.
>>> >
>>> >Same with wil...@every-other-isp-in-the-universe.com
>>> >
>>> >I really really hope this whole 'wilhelp' thing is just a joke for

So why do you have to emulate guttersnipes in insulting
thousands of people named Palmer?

>>> >Palmjob... a longwinded and dumb troll... I really want to think
that
>>> >this is what it is..

There's nothing funny at all about the wilhelp thievery.
I created wilhelp. I worked hard at my craft to make it
the or one of the most recognizeable names on the net.
I made wilhelp synonymous with entertaining writing,
and that is the ONLY reason the wilhelp forgers and
quasi-forgers steal it.

Go back about three years to when I first posted. I was
an unknown just like you. Now, do you REALLY think that
if I would have would have been the writer you enviously
conjure up, a "follow-up failure" who could not interest
readers--that the parasites would have started forging and
quasi-forging "wilhelp"?

Fact is, I can show you posts from the early wilhelp
days where people would tell me my name was ridiculous.
I have record of one saying, "Why don't your get a REAL
screen name?" (I guess the poster thought I should use
"CincMars" or "Scaramouche", something euphonic or
romantic.)

Yet, once my popularity as net writer took me far beyond
what any of us had expected, suddenly everyone wanted to
steal "wilhelp."

Now, I've already made it clear why I object, but I will
repeat, in case you missed that: Up to the point when
Human Leech David Kendrick started to steal my wilhelp
creation, the name had been synonymous with entertaining
writing. Having a few-dozen utterly talentless net
parasites using "wilhelp" cannot help but confuse readers.

The "wilhelp" parasites deny this, but I have seen ample
proof already, and I have in fact posted some of it.
People ARE confused by the quasi forgeries. Many
thousands of net readers associate Bill Palmer and
"wilhelp"; some of them will inevitably read posts
by the parasites, think I worte them, and they will
very likely not read my posts in the future.

That of course, is fine with the parasites. I have
already had occasion to know that the bigger a
parasite of mine gets, the more willingness he
shows toward harming his unwilling "host".

The reason the parasites are not universally condemned
at this time is that they work together to ridicule
my objections to their parasitism. For instance,
just read what "MacLennan" has already posted on
this thread. He is one of my biggest and ugliest
parasites.

"MacLennan" has no talent but for lying, as you have
seen. He has no real net-life for himself outside of
me. The same is true of "Goin Nova", or Louse-monkey
Hausmann. (He and "McLennan write enough alike to be
twins; they may be the same outsized parasite, in fact.)
Hausmann has been one of my biggest leeches for a
couple of years now.

The biggest "Bill Palmer's parasite" is Human Leech
David Kendrick. He is dirty tricks personified;
he is as low as it is possible to get in cyberspace.
Anyway, don't be fooled when these bloodsuckers
tell you it's all good fun. It isn't.

To understand the parasitism of the above, understand
that they have followed up hundreds of my original
articles. I have followed up almost none of theirs
for the obvious reason that they have no talent and
nothing of interest to say, outside of "Bill Palmer".


Anything to keep from accepting the horrid truth
>>> >that there is a living breathing 'human' (arguable) out there who
is
>>> >actually this obsessed over something SO outrageous and SO
frivilous...

Nothing "frivilous" about working hard to become the
most popular writer in the net and having your name-
creation stolen by a bunch of no-talent parasites, who
were almost totally obscure until they attached
themselves to me with their "wilhelp" thievery
and other bloodsucking behaviors.

>>> >I want to believe that this isn't possible. I really do.

Sure, because a few-dozen wilhelp parasites convinced
you--against all logic--that their thievery is all
a big joke. Far from it.


>>>
>>> Sorry, you're out of luck on that on.
>>> He really *does* care about that trivia like that.

When a "wilhelp" parasite such as yourself steals the
most famous screen name on the net in order to confuse
and then calls the name he steals "triva" I am reminded
of the sentenced car thief who wails to his fellow
jail bird, "Damn, man, the judge gave me three years
for stealing that piece of shit car--can you believe
it?" Fact is, you and the other "wilhelp" parasites
are an unsually low breed. IF you had anything at
all going for yourselves, you wouldn't be forced to
do quasi-forgeries of my creations in order to
deceive my readers.


>>>
>>
>>Who is this wilhelp person we are taliking about?
>

>*Shhhhhhh!* If you're very lucky, he won't tell you.
>
><tiptoes quietly away from the thread...>
>
>Lionel.

wilhelp
alt.genius.bill-palmer

Roger Williams

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Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
> In <6bu0td$f...@enews1.newsguy.com> Cockroach Roger Wemyss
> <rog...@shell1.tiac.net> aka "Cockroach Roger Williams" writes:
> >
> >Lionel Lauer <nos...@sexzilla.net> wrote:
> >> Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
> >
> >> >Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
> >> >writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
> >
> >> *blink*
> >
> >> Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
> >
> > Steve Boursy. And vice versa.

> Cockroach Roger Wemyss (aka Cockroach Roger Wemyss) certainly
> gives every indication of being a big reader of mine. He has
> followed up my original articles on countless occasions, and
> he often posts on threads that *I* start. Further, he has
> frequently boasted of having a website dedicated to me.

Ayup. Recognized by Yahoo! as *the* authoritative site for information
about you, Spunky. http://www.parrot.net/pfaq.htm

Funny; I don't see your lumbering FAQ anywhere in there, Binky.
Now why do you suppose that is, beyond the obvious FAQ that your
status as a "writer" goes no further than the tiny confines of your
mollusc-like mind?

<space reserved for Palmjism's whimpering and sour grapes>

>
> Conversely, it is rarely, if ever, that I have followed up an
> original "thread-starter" by Roach Rog. Rog currently ranks
> as one of the top five "Bill Palmer's parasites". It is
> unlikely that he EVER misses a post by me, despite his
> whines.

Yup. Where else can you find free manure produced by the megaton?
Christ, you've made a career on spewing out ton after ton of horseshit,
and let's face it, some farmers pay a premium price for it. They're even
willing to overlook that fact that some sheep were... "harmed" ... in the
manufacture of it.

> Bill Palmer
> alt.genius.bill-palmer
> >
> >--
> >"On top of that, there are a great many people who
> >enjoy reading Steve Boursy's articles. I am but
> >one of them."
> >
> >Biil Palmjob getting his knees dirty in msg ID
> >
> <68flmo$i...@dfw-ixnews6.ix.netcom.com>
> >
> >


--
As Marquez knows very well, I have for one year been the
target of a massive Unenet defamation operation carried
out by Joe Sexton, Roger Wemyss (who runs libel campaigns
under the fake name "Roger Wemyss")

-Biil Palmjob, usenet's biggest retard, gibbering incomprehensibly in
message-ID: <66uoqi$6...@dfw-ixnews11.ix.netcom.com>


Lionel Lauer

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Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :

>In <34e84215...@enews.newsguy.com> nos...@sexzilla.net (Lionel
>Lauer) writes:
>>
>>Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :


>>
>>>Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
>>>writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
>>

>>*blink*
>>
>>Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
>

>Bitterness, Lionel, it will eat your heart out sooner
>or later. Fact is, I don't need to "name" anyone who

You're misinterpreting me there. I'm not being bitter, I'm taking the
piss. (To use a fine old British expression.)

>"wants to read my stuff". If you will start checking
>through Dejanews, you will find irrefutable evidence of
>literally several thousand people who not only have
>"read my stuff" but have followed me up.

Ah, you missed the emphasised word in my comment, which was '*wants*'.
Hint: You can tell what the pivotal word was by the way I emphasised it
with asterisks, a common Usenet convention.
I could bold it with HTML next time, if it'll help your comprehension at
all.

>Based on conventional means of estimating ratios for
>"readers-to-followers-up", that indicates many, many
>thousands of people read my articles regularly. On
>the other hand, if you want to think that people would
>pass up a twenty new "wilhelps" to read one "genuine
>Lionel", you are welcome to your own illusions.

Cool! - Want to bet on it?
I'd like to do a quick survey on that:
People! - Would you pass up 20 of Biil's posts to read *one* of my
posts?
(Five bucks says that we get more yes's than no's.)

>By the way, the fact that I never heard of YOU until
>YOU followed ME up on this thread says something too.

You must have a very poor memory, you've followed up my posts on at
least two other occasions.

Mind you, I can see how you might have trouble remembering me, I don't
crosspost to 4 groups or more on every post I make, so I doubt if I'm
anywhere near as much in people's faces as you are.

>Only please spare me the weasly, "I don't read you, I
>just follow you up." I know better. It's an excuse

Generally when I see your posts I skip them. I sometimes read a couple
of par's, then hit the 'n' key.
Very, very occasionally I read further - I generally regret it.

This time I'm in the mood for a bit of a stir, & *you* are my guest for
today!

>of the feeble and it insults the intelligence. I mean,
>hey, let's ALL start following up people we don't read,
>just to "improve the newsgroup chaos"! Right, Lionel?
>
> Lional Lauer
> Under wilhelp power,
> Can't help but lookin'
> Just to see what's cookin'...

Woohoo! a flame poem.

Can I play too?
Here's one from me:

Oh shit, it's another monologue,
looks like Plamer's on the job.
24 hours, day & night.
The fool can't tell when he's lost a fight.

Posts his garbage to hell & back,
in spite of all the awful flack.

Just can't seem to understand,
why his stuff's not in demand.

Lionel.


--
W Lionel Lauer - Now demunged for your emailing pleasure.
. | ,. w , "Some people are alive only because
\|/ \|/ it is illegal to kill them." Perna condita delenda est

---^----^---------------------------------------------------------------

wil...@ix.netcom.com

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Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

In <6buk84$e...@enews2.newsguy.com> Roger Williams

<rog...@shell1.tiac.net> writes:
>
>wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>> In <6bu0td$f...@enews1.newsguy.com> Cockroach Roger Wemyss
>> <rog...@shell1.tiac.net> aka "Cockroach Roger Williams" writes:
>> >
>> >Lionel Lauer <nos...@sexzilla.net> wrote:
>> >> Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
>> >
>> >> >Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
>> >> >writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
>> >
>> >> *blink*
>> >
>> >> Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.

The thousands of people whose follow-ups to my articles
are archived in Dejanews prove a great many people "read
my stuff". If you can use Dejanews, I scarcely need to
waste my writing time preparing a listing of thousands
of certified wilhelp readers.

>> > Steve Boursy. And vice versa.
>
>> Cockroach Roger Wemyss (aka Cockroach Roger Wemyss) certainly
>> gives every indication of being a big reader of mine. He has
>> followed up my original articles on countless occasions, and
>> he often posts on threads that *I* start. Further, he has
>> frequently boasted of having a website dedicated to me.
>
> Ayup. Recognized by Yahoo! as *the* authoritative site for
information
>about you, Spunky. http://www.parrot.net/pfaq.htm

My point about you was that you have proved youself one
of the leading "Bill Palmer's parasites" and have merited
top ranking as such for quite a while. On many occasions
and in many newsgroups you have begged readers to visit your
"great Bill Palmer website". As to what it consists of at
the moment, I neither know nor care. Your own habitual
Usenet newsgroup advertising of me to attract people to
your webiste is enough to demonstrate your parasitism
of me beyond all doubt, Cockroach Wemyss.


>
> Funny; I don't see your lumbering FAQ anywhere in there, Binky.
>Now why do you suppose that is, beyond the obvious FAQ that your
>status as a "writer" goes no further than the tiny confines of your

>mollusc-like mind? [...]

By the way, Roach Rog, you never responded to another
point I made about you. After some public-minded netizens
busted you for running your defamation campaigns under a
fake name, you began to wail that you were not really lying
about your name, since those who wanted to play "net
detective" COULD HAVE UNCOVERED your real name at any
time.

That's not good enough, Roach Wemyss. Morally and ethically
"dissimulatation" has long been considered as wrong as blatant
lying. Now, it is true that I do not recall your saying,
"My REAL name is Roger Williams." However, there is no
question that you dissimulated to that effect on hundreds
of shabby little occasions.

A dissimulator is one who dissembles, according to THE
OXFORD DICTIONAY. "Dissemble," they say, means "...
assume a false appearance of," or "conceal the identity
of...". Now, sir, when you put a false name on your libelous
posts again and again, do you seriously maintain that the
reasonable person (who makes up the large part of forgery,
hate crime, and defamation juries in the U.S.) would not
conclude that you were dissembling, Roger Wemyss?

Something that impressed me as a child was hearing adults
speak of a particularly disreputable character causing
some annoyance in the community. Of the party in question
it was said, "The guy's so dishonest that you can't even
believe him when you ask him what his name is!" In our
wired community, that's exactly the sort of person YOU
have proved yourself to be, Cockroach Wemyss: dishonest
and disreputable by the time-honored standards of most
communities throughout world history.

And yet, Roger Wemyss, you vile liar, when you insult a Jewish
Rabbi with the foulest and most bigoted allegations imaginable,
you act as though you think people will not consider the
dishonest, malicious SOURCE of those subhuman defamations.

Of dissimulation, I think it was Steele who said, "Simulation
is a pretence of what is not; dissimulation is a concealment
of what is." Now, since you KNEW that perhaps only one reader
in one-hundred would do the investigating required to discover
your real name, it is plain enough that you were trying to
fool 99 readers out of 100 as to your real identity, Cockroach
Wemyss.

You were, it is clear, trying to conceal the truth from
a lot of readers, and thanks to the alertness of people you
were vilifying (other than myself) you got caught.

Another way of measuring whether a moral and ethical
dissimulation has in fact occurred involves determining
whether the accused dissembler corrects parties who are
clearly acting on false information based on the dis-
simulator's own factitious representations: I and many
others addressed you as "Roger Williams" on many occasions--
in NO instance did you correct anyone, proving beyond all
doubt that you are a dissembling sneak, Cockroach Roger
Wemyss.

Bill Palmer
alt.genius.bill-palmer

Mr Average Netizen

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Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to alt.genius.bill-palmer, news.admin.net-abuse.usenet, news.admin.censorship, alt.forgery

Lionel Lauer wrote in message <34e84215...@enews.newsguy.com>...
>Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :


>
>>Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
>>writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
>

>*blink*
>
>Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.


Errrr let me see, errr Bill Palmer ??

Biil Palmjob

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Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

In article <6buj6p$n...@sjx-ixn2.ix.netcom.com>,

wil...@ix.netcom.com () wrote:
>
> Anything to keep from accepting the horrid truth
> >>> >that there is a living breathing 'human' (arguable) out there who
> is
> >>> >actually this obsessed over something SO outrageous and SO
> frivilous...
>
> Nothing "frivilous" about working hard to become the
> most popular writer in the net and having your name-
> creation stolen by a bunch of no-talent parasites, who
> were almost totally obscure until they attached
> themselves to me with their "wilhelp" thievery
> and other bloodsucking behaviors.

It sure is a shame about those bloodsucking parasites using your
nom-de-net for their own evil purposes. What are you going to do
about it? A talented man such as yourself surely has some
recourse...

>
> >>> >I want to believe that this isn't possible. I really do.
>
> Sure, because a few-dozen wilhelp parasites convinced
> you--against all logic--that their thievery is all
> a big joke. Far from it.

Definitely a very serious matter.

> >>>
> >>> Sorry, you're out of luck on that on.
> >>> He really *does* care about that trivia like that.
>
> When a "wilhelp" parasite such as yourself steals the
> most famous screen name on the net in order to confuse
> and then calls the name he steals "triva" I am reminded
> of the sentenced car thief who wails to his fellow
> jail bird, "Damn, man, the judge gave me three years
> for stealing that piece of shit car--can you believe
> it?" Fact is, you and the other "wilhelp" parasites
> are an unsually low breed. IF you had anything at
> all going for yourselves, you wouldn't be forced to
> do quasi-forgeries of my creations in order to
> deceive my readers.

Yes, your name is certainly on the tip of everyone's
tongue, overshadowing even the latest Clinton
fuck-capades.

> >>>
> >>
> >>Who is this wilhelp person we are taliking about?
> >
> >*Shhhhhhh!* If you're very lucky, he won't tell you.
> >
> ><tiptoes quietly away from the thread...>
> >
> >Lionel.

Stop making fun of me, parasite!

Goin' Nova

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Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

In article <6c0159$l...@dfw-ixnews8.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com ()
wrote:

> In <6buk84$e...@enews2.newsguy.com> Roger Williams
> <rog...@shell1.tiac.net> writes:
> >
> >wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
> >> In <6bu0td$f...@enews1.newsguy.com> Cockroach Roger Wemyss
> >> <rog...@shell1.tiac.net> aka "Cockroach Roger Williams" writes:
> >> >
> >> >Lionel Lauer <nos...@sexzilla.net> wrote:
> >> >> Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
> >> >
> >> >> >Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
> >> >> >writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
> >> >
> >> >> *blink*
> >> >
> >> >> Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
>
> The thousands of people whose follow-ups to my articles
> are archived in Dejanews prove a great many people "read
> my stuff".

Good. give us a precise count. I doubt you make to ONE thousand,
let alone plural thousands. Especially when there are so many <snicker>
of me. And, FWIW, not everyone who responds to your posts read them.
Or has any desire to...


> If you can use Dejanews, I scarcely need to
> waste my writing time preparing a listing of thousands
> of certified wilhelp readers.
>

IOW, he can't. And, most anyone who admits to being a wilhelp reader
certainly is certifiable...

<snip>

--
Bill has this pile of a lot of crap, some of it neat crap--but it would be
nice if he would do something more with it, rather than park it off on the
side of Usenet. Unprocessed crap smells, and no-one wants to have to sort
through it.

_Stan Kalisch III
<Pine.SUN.3.96L-rev3_1-10....@crl8.crl.com>

Goin' Nova

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Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

In article <6bp5bp$q...@dfw-ixnews5.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com ()
wrote:

> In <6bodd5$2...@bgtnsc02.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com


> ("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, Quasi-forger and parasite, recently
> smoked out of the woods as "Goin' Nova") grunts:
>
> Where did you get the "wilhelp" Louse-monkey? I mean,
> who created it and made it famous for a couple of years
> before Human Leech Kendrick--and then YOU--began the
> quasi-forgeries to attach yourselves to me?

Oh, you are a silly, silly boy. How far back in your DejaNews Archive <snicker>
do we have to go before we find you (paraphrased here, of course) saying
that there is no way in hell anyone could mistake your writing for mine? If
true,
how could anything I do be a forgery, "quasi" or otherwise?

For all your pomposity, you still are a fucking moron. But then again, I
suppose that's why you think people would confuse "lousem...@wilhelp.com"
with "wil...@ix.netcom.com". They do both have "wilhelp", "@" and ".com" and
if, you, the great <guffaw> writer cannot discern them, how can mere mortals?
<snicker>


> >
> >In article <6boa11$e...@sjx-ixn8.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com


> () wrote:
> >
> >> In <6bns2j$h...@dfw-ixnews3.ix.netcom.com> Mike MacLennan
> >> <defame@wilhelp.*expunge.these.fields*.com> writes:
> >

Let's try a far simpler question. In all the time and all the postings
you've done in this little shithole, how many forgeries ( other
than those you claim were done to you) have you protested?
<snicker>

My point, fuckwit, is that if you want others to care about you
being forged, perhaps you should extend others the same
courtesy.

Not that a fucking moron of your stature will care or understand.

> >
> >Funny, he was forged right here, in your own little shithole.
>
> What the hell are you jabbering about now, Louse-monkey?
> Are you suggestion that because I am a regular in a
> newsgroup, I am supposed to know when someone other than
> myself is being forged by unknown parties?
>

Fine. Are you suggesting, that because you were forged, that any of the
regulars in this newsgroup are supposed to notice (or care)?


> As was
> >Raoul. And while you didn't applaud the action,
>
> No, I didn't. But when *I* was forged YOU certainly applauded
> the action, you foul leech. Further, there is one other very
> big issue you are trying to shuck and jive your way around.
>

Lies. Damned Lies. And Palmjob's version of reality.

> I had no association with this forgery, since I have NEVER
> taken anything morally and ethically belonging to Wotan
> or Xemblinosky. I never used their names nor quasi-forged
> them or anyone else.
>

Did you notice anywhere that I said you did? Why would you attempt
to confuse the readers by saying I did?

> On the other hand, YOU are one of MY leading parasites,
> Louse-monkey, and that makes all the difference. You think
> that because you can't be arrested, that your parasitism
> will go unnoticed. It won't, you drooling bloodsucker.
>

Funny, I am in this newsgroup for what reason? Had you learned
at some point to keep your fucking mouth shut, our business would've
concluded years ago. You couldn't and the rest is this dungheap you
call home.

> I created "wilhelp" and made it famous for two and one
> half years before human leech David Kendrick began
> stealing it (several months before he claims to have
> registered "wilhelp" as a domain name). You, in
> imitation of Kendrick, also began to use "wilhelp"
> to tighten your leech-like connection to me, your
> unwilling host, Louse-monkey.
>

<Yawn> and the person who invented pencils died penniless. So?

> you failed to
> >condemn it, which, according to the latest Palmjob blather on the
> >subject, is almost tantamount to being a net criminal.
>
> Nonsense. YOU are one of MY biggest and foulest parasites,
> Louse-monkey Hausmann.

I'm touched. Truly I am. <snicker> Looks like the rest of you will have
to work harder...

Goin' Nova

unread,
Feb 12, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/12/98
to

In article <6bue90$r...@sjx-ixn2.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com () wrote:

> In <34e84215...@enews.newsguy.com> nos...@sexzilla.net (Lionel
> Lauer) writes:
> >
> >Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
> >

> >>Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
> >>writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
> >

> >*blink*
> >
> >Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
>

> Bitterness, Lionel, it will eat your heart out sooner
> or later.

Take from the expert, he knows. <snicker>



> Fact is, I don't need to "name" anyone who

> "wants to read my stuff". If you will start checking
> through Dejanews, you will find irrefutable evidence of
> literally several thousand people who not only have
> "read my stuff" but have followed me up.
>

And I say you're lying. And Dejanews proves it. But you still think
the .sig file hit thousands of newsgroups. That pretty much sums
up your problem, Palmjob, you're always an order of magnitude
wrong.



> Based on conventional means of estimating ratios for
> "readers-to-followers-up", that indicates many, many
> thousands of people read my articles regularly. On
> the other hand, if you want to think that people would
> pass up a twenty new "wilhelps" to read one "genuine
> Lionel", you are welcome to your own illusions.
>

Yeah, Binky, and how many times have you bought the
Golden Gate bridge?

<snicker>

You couldn't estimate the number of fingers on your hands, without
help from someone else.

> By the way, the fact that I never heard of YOU until
> YOU followed ME up on this thread says something too.

It says you ought to get out more.



> Only please spare me the weasly, "I don't read you, I
> just follow you up." I know better. It's an excuse

> of the feeble and it insults the intelligence. I mean,
> hey, let's ALL start following up people we don't read,
> just to "improve the newsgroup chaos"! Right, Lionel?

Your posts do a far better job of insulting intelligence, yours.

John Davis

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:

[...] [I'll just snip out Palmjob's pathetic attempt at public dick
stroking.]

: There's nothing funny at all about the wilhelp thievery.

I have to agree with you there. No matter how funny the material you
steal you are able to suck out the last dregs of humor before you post it
as yours.

: I created wilhelp.

No, that was David Kendrick. He paid for the domain, set up the site.
gave out accounts, helped set up web pages, and helped line up advertisers.
You had nothing at all to do with it.

: I worked hard at my craft to make it

It's to bad this is the best you can do then. I bet your masters are
pretty damn disappointed in their former apprentice. In fact I bet you
can't get one of them to admit you ever worked under him. I bet they get
together at the local craft booze joint and drink themselves into oblivion
trying to forget their shame. No doubt, when in their cups, they remember
with burning rue the lost opportunities to drop hammers or other heavy
objects on your head.

: the or one of the most recognizable names on the net.

I'm not sure what you're trying to say here so I'll pass it by. If you
remember and want me to point out how stupid you are for holding whatever
illusion you are alluding to then post clarification.

: I made wilhelp synonymous with entertaining writing,

Well, actually, all the writers that have flamed your ass for being a
useless no talent blow-hard have made it famous as a figure of fun. In
the sense that your incompetence has attracted interesting flames you
may be technically right but it was a pretty passive effort on your
part. I mean, you just lay there and let anyone that wants to have a
free kick.

: and that is the ONLY reason the wilhelp forgers and
: quasi-forgers steal it.

Steal what, Palmjob? You post it for free, no one has to steal it. In
fact, they are forced to take it to get to the good stuff.

[...] [line upon line of Palmjob whining "they stole my name" expunged.]

Don't be silly, Palmjob, who would want to steal either Palmjob or wilyelp.

--
A_A
John Davis (o o) Marcus Tullius Cicero (106-43 BC) observed:
----------oOO-(^)-OOo----------------------------------------------------
~ Democritus maintains that there can be no great poet
without a spite of madness.

kjetil miasmusson

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

Mike MacLennan wrote:
>
> wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
> >
> > In <6bll63$igg$0...@dosa.alt.net>
> > wilh...@southland.smart.net.yankee.go.home (Johnny Reb Hausmann)
> > writes:
> > >
> > >-----BEGIN PGP SIGNED MESSAGE-----
> > >
> > >NANA* removed, as I will not continue a flame war there and nobody
> > there is
> > >interested in reading PalmerPiles(tm) anyway.
> > >
> > >
> > >wil...@ix.netcom.com (Some Nameless Poltroon) wrote:
> > >
> > >>In <6bkvs8$6...@bgtnsc03.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com
> > >>("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, recently smoked out of the woods
> > >>after cowering under "Goin' Nova")
> > >
> > >Smoked out of the woods...how? Because he told you he was Hausmann?
> > Because I
> > >told you he was Hausmann? Because the WHOLE DAMN ALT.FLAME CROWD told
> > you he
> > >was Hausmann?
> > >
> > >John Hausmann has been using "Goin' Nova" since well before you
> > started
> > >stinking up the flame groups. It does you no credit that you couldn't
> > figure
> > >it out.
> > >
> > >
> > >>>No. I agreed it was a forgery, ya fucking moron. But, as you
> > >>>failed to complain against Gareth's forgeries of Raoul, WHY
> > >>>THE FUCK SHOULD ANYONE GIVE A FUCK WHEN YOU get forged?
> > >>>You've already made it quite clear there are rules for you that do
> > >>>not apply to others. You wanna protest forgeries, and have others
> > >>>join you? Then protest forgeries of people you don't like. It will
> > >>>at least soften the impression of your hypocrisy.
> > >
> > >And on this point Palmjob was uncharacteristically silent.
> >
> > How absurd. On the basis of some accusations that Person A
> > has forged Person B (a situation I know nothing of besides
> > a few allegations I have seen bandied about by notorious
> > liars) *I* am supposed to refrain from protesting the
> > out-and-out, complete forgery of ny screen-name and
> > address! Makes no sense to me.
>
> No, you just aren't supposed to be a hypocrite.
>
> P.S. http://www.dejanews.com
>
> Search for rao...@usa.net

I get confussed with all these opponents of wilhelp Palmer. You and
roulx are pretending wilhelps too?

---kjetil


kjetil miasmusson

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>
> In <34E26F...@wanax.se> kjetil miasmusson <mia...@wanax.se>
> writes:
> >
> >Lionel Lauer wrote:
> >>
> >> Quoth bl...@azzy.blah (Azzy) :
> >>
> >> >Wotan wrote in article <wotanEo...@netcom.com>:
> >> >> In article <6blf0d$k...@dfw-ixnews12.ix.netcom.com>,
> >> >> <wil...@ix.netcom.com> wrote while drinking:
> >> >>
> >> >> > Further, it is interesting to note that
> >> >> >so far, the only people who have seen fit to make light
> >> >> >of my concerns about the recent complete forgeries of my
> >> >> >screen name and address are the "wilhelp" quasi-forgers and
> >> >> >parasites, like MacLennan here.
> >> >>
> >> >> Fuck You Palmjob.

> >> >>
> >> >> BTW, wil...@netcom.com is a valid address that anyone can get if
> YOU do
> >> >> not already have it.
> >> >
> >> >Same with wil...@every-other-isp-in-the-universe.com
> >> >
> >> >I really really hope this whole 'wilhelp' thing is just a joke for
> >> >Palmjob... a longwinded and dumb troll... I really want to think
> that
> >> >this is what it is.. Anything to keep from accepting the horrid

> truth
> >> >that there is a living breathing 'human' (arguable) out there who
> is
> >> >actually this obsessed over something SO outrageous and SO
> frivilous...
> >> >I want to believe that this isn't possible. I really do.
> >>
> >> Sorry, you're out of luck on that on.
> >> He really *does* care about that trivia like that.
> >>
> >
> >Who is this wilhelp person we are taliking about?
>
> See Dejanews for "Facts in the Case of Bill Palmer".

I did look at this, saw interesting things about russia. But
I want to know more about wilhelp the person who is so feared
by the people.

-----kjetil


kjetil miasmusson

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

Dave Ratcliffe wrote:

>
> In<34E26F...@wanax.se>, kjetil miasmusson <mia...@wanax.se> wrote:
> |
> |Who is this wilhelp person we are taliking about?
> |
> |-----kjetil
>
> Y'know, when it comes right down to it this really says it all.
>
> Poor Bill. The knowledge that there is a sentient being on the net who never
> heard of him will drive him over the edge.
>
> But will we be able to tell when it happens?

I have looked in deja news about wilhelp Palmer. I never heard of
you eather, but you do not have your own newsgroup, I noticed.

-----kjetil


kjetil miasmusson

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

Goin' Nova wrote:
>
> In article <6c0159$l...@dfw-ixnews8.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com ()
> wrote:
>
> > In <6buk84$e...@enews2.newsguy.com> Roger Williams
> > <rog...@shell1.tiac.net> writes:
> > >
> > >wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
> > >> In <6bu0td$f...@enews1.newsguy.com> Cockroach Roger Wemyss
> > >> <rog...@shell1.tiac.net> aka "Cockroach Roger Williams" writes:
> > >> >
> > >> >Lionel Lauer <nos...@sexzilla.net> wrote:
> > >> >> Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
> > >> >
> > >> >> >Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
> > >> >> >writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
> > >> >
> > >> >> *blink*
> > >> >
> > >> >> Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
> >
> > The thousands of people whose follow-ups to my articles
> > are archived in Dejanews prove a great many people "read
> > my stuff".
>
> Good. give us a precise count. I doubt you make to ONE thousand,
> let alone plural thousands. Especially when there are so many <snicker>
> of me. And, FWIW, not everyone who responds to your posts read them.
> Or has any desire to...
>
> > If you can use Dejanews, I scarcely need to
> > waste my writing time preparing a listing of thousands
> > of certified wilhelp readers.
> >
>
> IOW, he can't. And, most anyone who admits to being a wilhelp reader
> certainly is certifiable...

Now that I looked at the deja news archive, I am a wilhelp Palmer
reader what do you think of that?

----kjetil


kjetil miasmusson

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

Reign In Blood wrote:
>
> Gilbert T. Sullivan wrote in article
> <6blj03$c...@bgtnsc03.worldnet.att.net>:
> > Commander Sheraton wrote:
> > >
> > > On Sun, 08 Feb 1998 10:37:01 -0600, the Raoul ® Xemblinosky Experience
> > > <rao...@mercury.bungmunch.edu> gave a rousing speech that won
> > > independence for a tiny island nation in the South Pacific. Just
> > > minutes later, this very same person logged into Usenet and wrote:
> > >
> > > ;WILHELP Ratings wrote:
> > > ;>
> > > ;> wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
> > > ;>
> > > ;> [...]
> > > ;>
> > > ;> > Yet, the ironic thing is, the poster himself is making a
> > > ;> > near-forgery of my address, though not a technical one.
> > > ;>
> > > ;> Exactly. Now shut up.
> > > ;
> > > ;Clealy, sir, is an invention on the order of "de-facto racist."
> > >
> > > Is that the same as a "de-facto fuKKKhead?"
> >
> > Why are you flooding news groups?
>
> Are you going to forge him now, muffy?

Not another forger of wilhelp Bill Palmer!

----kjetil


kjetil miasmusson

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to
> : and that is the ONLY reason the wilhelp forgers and
> : quasi-forgers steal it.
>
> Steal what, Palmjob? You post it for free, no one has to steal it. In
> fact, they are forced to take it to get to the good stuff.
>
> [...] [line upon line of Palmjob whining "they stole my name" expunged.]
>
> Don't be silly, Palmjob, who would want to steal either Palmjob or wilyelp.

What is a palmjob, Mister davis?

----kjetil


Roger Williams

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
> In <6buk84$e...@enews2.newsguy.com> Roger Williams
> <rog...@shell1.tiac.net> writes:
> >
> >wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
> >> In <6bu0td$f...@enews1.newsguy.com> Cockroach Roger Wemyss
> >> <rog...@shell1.tiac.net> aka "Cockroach Roger Williams" writes:
> >> >
> >> >Lionel Lauer <nos...@sexzilla.net> wrote:
> >> >> Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
> >> >
> >> >> >Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
> >> >> >writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
> >> >
> >> >> *blink*
> >> >
> >> >> Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.

> The thousands of people whose follow-ups to my articles
> are archived in Dejanews prove a great many people "read
> my stuff". If you can use Dejanews, I scarcely need to
> waste my writing time preparing a listing of thousands
> of certified wilhelp readers.

"On top of that, there are a great many people who


enjoy reading Steve Boursy's articles. I am but
one of them."

Biil Palmjob gumming Speedy's schlong in msg
ID<68flmo$i...@dfw-ixnews6.ix.netcom.com>


> >> > Steve Boursy. And vice versa.
> >
> >> Cockroach Roger Wemyss (aka Cockroach Roger Wemyss) certainly
> >> gives every indication of being a big reader of mine. He has
> >> followed up my original articles on countless occasions, and
> >> he often posts on threads that *I* start. Further, he has
> >> frequently boasted of having a website dedicated to me.
> >
> > Ayup. Recognized by Yahoo! as *the* authoritative site for
> information
> >about you, Spunky. http://www.parrot.net/pfaq.htm

> My point about you was that you have proved youself one
> of the leading "Bill Palmer's parasites" and have merited
> top ranking as such for quite a while. On many occasions
> and in many newsgroups you have begged readers to visit your
> "great Bill Palmer website". As to what it consists of at
> the moment, I neither know nor care. Your own habitual
> Usenet newsgroup advertising of me to attract people to
> your webiste is enough to demonstrate your parasitism
> of me beyond all doubt, Cockroach Wemys

Jesus H. Christ - 9 lines of screaming that says nothing more than
"waaah! I'm jealous!". Typical Palmjob. BTW, Spankard, my logs show you
visited my Biil Palmjob FAQ page waaaaaay back when I opened it. Spank.

> >
> > Funny; I don't see your lumbering FAQ anywhere in there, Binky.
> >Now why do you suppose that is, beyond the obvious FAQ that your
> >status as a "writer" goes no further than the tiny confines of your
> >mollusc-like mind? [...]

> By the way, Roach Rog, you never responded to another
> point I made about you. After some public-minded netizens
> busted you for running your defamation campaigns under a
> fake name, you began to wail that you were not really lying
> about your name, since those who wanted to play "net
> detective" COULD HAVE UNCOVERED your real name at any
> time.

Yeah, like in fingering rog...@millenium.tiac.net ... looking at TIAC's
staff page.. oh I dunno, fucking *asking* me? Only the idiots at Internic
got my name wrong (as is typical for me, but I can deal) when registering
parrot.net over the phone. In classic Speedbump/Vulis/Palmjob fashion,
they feel like Sherlock Holmes when they discover their microweenies every
time they take a leak screaming, "CLEALY, SIR, I SUSPECT YOU OF BEING A
TROUSER MOUSE!".

> That's not good enough, Roach Wemyss. Morally and ethically
> "dissimulatation" has long been considered as wrong as blatant
> lying. Now, it is true that I do not recall your saying,
> "My REAL name is Roger Williams." However, there is no
> question that you dissimulated to that effect on hundreds
> of shabby little occasions.

IOW, your empty rant is still hollow? Well, there's a fucking surprise.
Then again, it took over six months of Hausmann telling you he was "Goin'
Nova" before the little gears in grossly swollen head finally started to
click, and you were able to accept the screamingly obvious.

> A dissimulator is one who dissembles, according to THE
> OXFORD DICTIONAY.

Would you like to explain what the fuck a "DICTIONAY" is, Palmjob?
<snicker>

> "Dissemble," they say, means "...
> assume a false appearance of," or "conceal the identity
> of...". Now, sir, when you put a false name on your libelous
> posts again and again, do you seriously maintain that the
> reasonable person (who makes up the large part of forgery,
> hate crime, and defamation juries in the U.S.) would not
> conclude that you were dissembling, Roger Wemyss?

Oh? Are you now accusing me of forgery, hate crimes, and defamation?
I do love how every time someone flames you, you scream about law suits,
squeak about massive legal retribution, etc., only to be flogged again,
and again, and again. It looks like someone has picked up a penchant for
screaming "LAWSUIT!" after so many hours of net.fellating Boursy and Steve
Grubor. Of course, the full measure of your idiocy is revealed later on
below, Palmjob...

> Something that impressed me as a child was hearing adults
> speak of a particularly disreputable character causing
> some annoyance in the community. Of the party in question
> it was said, "The guy's so dishonest that you can't even
> believe him when you ask him what his name is!" In our
> wired community, that's exactly the sort of person YOU
> have proved yourself to be, Cockroach Wemyss: dishonest
> and disreputable by the time-honored standards of most
> communities throughout world history.

Yeah Palmjob, you towering net.paragon, as if there's anybody who gives
even half a shit what you think, or even has a half an inclination to sit
awake through one of your thousand gigabyte rants about your fragile ego
and easily bruised feelings.

> And yet, Roger Wemyss, you vile liar, when you insult a Jewish
> Rabbi with the foulest and most bigoted allegations imaginable,
> you act as though you think people will not consider the
> dishonest, malicious SOURCE of those subhuman defamations.

What the fuck are you talking about? Are you going to go on record
saying you believe "Rabbi Shlomo Ruthenberg" is *not* KotM Dmitri Vulis?
You stupid, drooling encephalitic diaper wearing retard - Vulis' fake
"Rabbi" alter ego has been spanked off the face of soc.culture.jewish so
many times, only a complete gibbering, moronic, empty headed black hole of
eternal stupidity would buy into Vulis' anti-semitic persona that he aims
at the vague nebulous entity of the "usenet cabal" (see the mass Kook
Kabal spam mail that accused CAUCE, the anti-spam email mavens of being
anti-semitic). You stupid, STUPID little man.

Palmjob, your final descent into being Boursy et al's
lapdog would be amusing if it wasn't so painfully stupid and
embarassing to the entire human race as a whole. Your desperate
lack of friends both on usenet and real life apparently forced
you to net.felch almost every single KotM winner in rapid, frenetic
succession. Un-fucking-believeable.

> Of dissimulation, I think it was Steele who said, "Simulation
> is a pretence of what is not; dissimulation is a concealment
> of what is." Now, since you KNEW that perhaps only one reader
> in one-hundred would do the investigating required to discover
> your real name, it is plain enough that you were trying to
> fool 99 readers out of 100 as to your real identity, Cockroach
> Wemyss.

It is plain to who, you? Funny how nobody else suffered under any such
pretensions, Palmjob. Then again, nobody else is quite as dim witted,
slow moving, and myopic as you when it comes to issues of usenet and
identity, either. You're quite literally in a class all by yourself there,
Patsy.

> You were, it is clear, trying to conceal the truth from
> a lot of readers, and thanks to the alertness of people you
> were vilifying (other than myself) you got caught.

Ah, Palmjob quickly discovers the best way to get an agreement
is to agree with himself. Assert point A, agree with point A. Do you have
any idea, Palmjob, just how stupid you look agreeing with your hastily
constructed strawmen all night long?

> Another way of measuring whether a moral and ethical
> dissimulation has in fact occurred involves determining
> whether the accused dissembler corrects parties who are
> clearly acting on false information based on the dis-
> simulator's own factitious representations: I and many
> others addressed you as "Roger Williams" on many occasions--
> in NO instance did you correct anyone, proving beyond all
> doubt that you are a dissembling sneak, Cockroach Roger
> Wemyss.

You have long since proved to me, beyond all shadow of a doubt, that
you are now little more than usenet's air sickness bag. A grotesque
little freak of a man, who has long since lost whatever vague ironic
appeal your long winded bloatspeak engendered you. Clealy, sir,
continue to be a dingleberry clinging ferociously to the curly ass hairs
of usenet. FOAD ESAD. HTH M.

> Biil Palmjob
> alt.felch.the-living-shit-out-of.dmitri-vulis

--
{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{} \|/
{} RogerW rog...@newsguy.com {} 0< -- Ljutefisk!
{} http://www.parrot.net ad...@parrot.net {} ^^^^(*)^^^^
{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{} ^^ / \ ^^

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

In <6c0bq0$5...@bgtnsc02.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com

("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, recently smoked out of the woods
here he was cowering as "Goin' Nova") grunts:
>
>In article <6bue90$r...@sjx-ixn2.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com

() wrote:
>
>> In <34e84215...@enews.newsguy.com> nos...@sexzilla.net (Lionel
>> Lauer) writes:
>> >
>> >Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
>> >
>> >>Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
>> >>writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
>> >
>> >*blink*
>> >
>> >Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
>>
>> Bitterness, Lionel, it will eat your heart out sooner
>> or later.
>
>Take from the expert, he knows. <snicker>

Still bitter for getting "The Spankiest Spank Ever Spanked"
eh, Louse-monkey? (For details, readers are referred to
last month's original article beginning the long thread
under that famous subject line.)


>
>> Fact is, I don't need to "name" anyone who
>> "wants to read my stuff". If you will start checking
>> through Dejanews, you will find irrefutable evidence of
>> literally several thousand people who not only have
>> "read my stuff" but have followed me up.
>>
>
>And I say you're lying.

And why should the readers care what one of my leading
parasites drools, Louse-monkey? People know that leeches
such as yourself never respect their unwilling hosts.

And Dejanews proves it. But you still think
>the .sig file hit thousands of newsgroups. That pretty much sums
>up your problem,

And of course the Louse-monkey wilhelp leech WOULD
insult everyone name Palmer:

Palmjob, you're always an order of magnitude
>wrong.

Take it from one of the most famous parasite's
on the net, eh, Louse-monkey?


>
>> Based on conventional means of estimating ratios for
>> "readers-to-followers-up", that indicates many, many
>> thousands of people read my articles regularly. On
>> the other hand, if you want to think that people would
>> pass up a twenty new "wilhelps" to read one "genuine
>> Lionel", you are welcome to your own illusions.
>>
>
>Yeah, Binky, and how many times have you bought the
>Golden Gate bridge?

In other words, the REALLY famous writer is Louse-
monkey John, who has followed up literally hundreds
of my original articles with his drivel, when, on
the other hand, I have almost never followed up an
orignal article by him, since he has so little talent
he is nearly incapable of producing an orignal article
in the first place! So of course, Hausmann has MUCH to
say about his unwilling "host". Louse-monkey is stalker
and a typically ungrateful leech.


>
><snicker>
>
>You couldn't estimate the number of fingers on your hands, without
>help from someone else.

Oh sure, that's right right: It is Louse-monkey Hausmann who
has written all the famous original articles starting all those
long threads that countless folks have replied on. Gosh,
I had the thing backwards, somehow...


>
>> By the way, the fact that I never heard of YOU until
>> YOU followed ME up on this thread says something too.
>
>It says you ought to get out more.

No, it says YOU should get a life and stop
sucking my blood, Louse-monkey John. It says
you have no talent and originality, so you affix
yourself like some hideous barnacle-mutation
on someone who does (me), Hausmann.

>
>> Only please spare me the weasly, "I don't read you, I
>> just follow you up." I know better. It's an excuse
>> of the feeble and it insults the intelligence. I mean,
>> hey, let's ALL start following up people we don't read,
>> just to "improve the newsgroup chaos"! Right, Lionel?

Lionel Lauer
Under wilhelp power,
Got to keep lookin'


Just to see what's cookin'...


Bill Palmer
alt.genius.bill-palmer


wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

In <jrdavisE...@netcom.com> jrd...@netcom.com
("Pus Bag Plagiarist" John Davis) writes:
>
>wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:

My, my, we can't even get past Pus Bag's Davis' first
sentence without running into one of his hallmark
perverted fantasies. [...] Davis' deviated drooling
snipped, as usual.

Let's see, what does the Pus Bag Plagiarist have to
say this time, in addition to sharing his perverted
fantasies with us as usual?

--Oh yes, Davis announces that I stole wilhelp from
Kendrick other than the other way around. Strange.
Dejanews news shows that I used my famous creation
for two and one half years before Human Leech Kendrick
began his quasi-forgery to confuse my readers.

--Oh, yes, Pus Bag, one of the most famous slices of
burnt toast in net history, claims that he somehow
"flamed me".

That's it. That's the extent of Davis' latest expulsion
of sewer gas. Not much to it...

Pus Bag Plagiarist
Cringin' in the sewer mist,
Bilious and uncivil
Spewing forth his drivel...


>

Archie Leach

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

Palmjob got forged?

Why?

Who would bother?

Just idle, drunken thoughts. Hopefully the Yanks can come back in the
Olympic hockey tournament or else our ant.U brethren will have to deal
with a shit-storm from the god-damned Swedes.....

Well...a potential shit-storm. The shit would be there for the
Lutefisken to use were the dweebs from East Norway to win the
Olympics...

Or is it West Finland?

Or North Denmark?

I can't ever tell....

yadda yadda yadda

Archie Leach

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

In <6c0o0t$m...@enews2.newsguy.com> Cockroach Roger Wemyss

<rog...@shell1.tiac.net> aka "Cockroach Roger Williams" writes:
>
>wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>> In <6buk84$e...@enews2.newsguy.com> Roger Williams
>> <rog...@shell1.tiac.net> writes:
>> >
>> >wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>> >> In <6bu0td$f...@enews1.newsguy.com> Cockroach Roger Wemyss
>> >> <rog...@shell1.tiac.net> aka "Cockroach Roger Williams" writes:
>> >> >
>> >> >Lionel Lauer <nos...@sexzilla.net> wrote:
>> >> >> Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
>> >> >
>> >> >> >Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
>> >> >> >writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
>> >> >
>> >> >> *blink*
>> >> >
>> >> >> Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
>
>> The thousands of people whose follow-ups to my articles
>> are archived in Dejanews prove a great many people "read
>> my stuff". If you can use Dejanews, I scarcely need to
>> waste my writing time preparing a listing of thousands
>> of certified wilhelp readers.
>
>"On top of that, there are a great many people who
>enjoy reading Steve Boursy's articles. I am but
>one of them."
>
>Biil Palmjob gumming Speedy's schlong in msg
> ID<68flmo$i...@dfw-ixnews6.ix.netcom.com>

So what's the joke supposed to be, Roach Rog? That
Steve ISN'T one of the most widely read people on
the net? I know better. The difference between the
two of us is that we both read Steve's articles
regularly, but you don't have the guts to admit
it; you just always seem to know what he is
saying. He twists your nose out of joint by
osmosis, I suppose.


>
>> >> > Steve Boursy. And vice versa.
>> >
>> >> Cockroach Roger Wemyss (aka Cockroach Roger Wemyss) certainly
>> >> gives every indication of being a big reader of mine. He has
>> >> followed up my original articles on countless occasions, and
>> >> he often posts on threads that *I* start. Further, he has
>> >> frequently boasted of having a website dedicated to me.
>> >
>> > Ayup.

We both agree you are a leech, eh, Rog?

Recognized by Yahoo! as *the* authoritative site for
>> information
>> >about you, Spunky.

It's just as I said, Roach Rog. You have long been one
of my official parasites of record.

http://www.parasite.site.parrot.net/pfaq.htm


>
>> My point about you was that you have proved youself one
>> of the leading "Bill Palmer's parasites" and have merited
>> top ranking as such for quite a while. On many occasions
>> and in many newsgroups you have begged readers to visit your
>> "great Bill Palmer website". As to what it consists of at
>> the moment, I neither know nor care. Your own habitual
>> Usenet newsgroup advertising of me to attract people to
>> your webiste is enough to demonstrate your parasitism

>> of me beyond all doubt, Cockroach Wemyss?

[...] Then we agree again, eh, Roach Rog?

>> > Funny; I don't see your lumbering FAQ anywhere in there, Binky.
>> >Now why do you suppose that is, beyond the obvious FAQ that your
>> >status as a "writer" goes no further than the tiny confines of your
>> >mollusc-like mind? [...]
>
>> By the way, Roach Rog, you never responded to another
>> point I made about you. After some public-minded netizens
>> busted you for running your defamation campaigns under a
>> fake name, you began to wail that you were not really lying
>> about your name, since those who wanted to play "net
>> detective" COULD HAVE UNCOVERED your real name at any
>> time.

>> That's not good enough, Roach Wemyss. Morally and ethically


>> "dissimulatation" has long been considered as wrong as blatant
>> lying. Now, it is true that I do not recall your saying,
>> "My REAL name is Roger Williams." However, there is no
>> question that you dissimulated to that effect on hundreds
>> of shabby little occasions.
>
> IOW, your empty rant is still hollow? Well, there's a fucking
surprise.
>Then again, it took over six months of Hausmann telling you he was
"Goin'
>Nova" before the little gears in grossly swollen head finally started
to
>click, and you were able to accept the screamingly obvious.

Your little fantasies aimed at easing the
painful humiliations of the spanked Louse-monkey
have no hope of succeeding, Roach Rog.


>
>> A dissimulator is one who dissembles, according to THE

>> OXFORD DICTIONARY.

[typo corrected]


>
> Would you like to explain what the fuck a "DICTIONAY" is,

And of course, the most famous keyboarding cockroach on
the planet WOULD be a typo-pouncer and WOULD insult
everyone named Palmer! Not much surprise there, except
there is always an irony to Cockroach Wemyss' typo-
pounces, since he makes quite a few typos and misspellings
himself, as I often point out to him. I'm sure we'll
find one of his trademark misspellings before we are done
here.

Palmjob?
><snicker>
>
>> "Dissemble," they say, means "...
>> assume a false appearance of," or "conceal the identity
>> of...". Now, sir, when you put a false name on your libelous
>> posts again and again, do you seriously maintain that the
>> reasonable person (who makes up the large part of forgery,
>> hate crime, and defamation juries in the U.S.) would not
>> conclude that you were dissembling, Roger Wemyss?

Cockroah Wemyss perverted fantasies snipped. The sick
bastard is getting as bad as Wormy Wilkes and the Pus
Bag Davis deviate about projecting his repugnant fantasies
in my direction. [...]


>
>> Something that impressed me as a child was hearing adults
>> speak of a particularly disreputable character causing
>> some annoyance in the community. Of the party in question
>> it was said, "The guy's so dishonest that you can't even
>> believe him when you ask him what his name is!" In our
>> wired community, that's exactly the sort of person YOU
>> have proved yourself to be, Cockroach Wemyss: dishonest
>> and disreputable by the time-honored standards of most
>> communities throughout world history.
>
> Yeah Palmjob, you towering net.paragon, as if there's anybody who
gives
>even half a shit what you think,

In other words, readers now pass ME up to read Cockroach Roger
Wemyss droolings! Just ask Roach Rog, when he is not busy
working on "his" Bill Palmer parasite-site, that is.

or even has a half an inclination to sit
>awake through one of your thousand gigabyte rants about your fragile
ego
>and easily bruised feelings.
>
>> And yet, Roger Wemyss, you vile liar, when you insult a Jewish
>> Rabbi with the foulest and most bigoted allegations imaginable,
>> you act as though you think people will not consider the
>> dishonest, malicious SOURCE of those subhuman defamations.

I have no idea what the famous Cockroach is raving
about just below:


>
> What the fuck are you talking about? Are you going to go on record
>saying you believe "Rabbi Shlomo Ruthenberg" is *not* KotM Dmitri
Vulis?

I have no clue as to what you are ranting about there,
Roach Rog.

>You stupid, drooling encephalitic diaper wearing retard -

~~~~~~~~

Same old Wemyss. If you point out his fabrications,
racism, and defamations, you become a "retard". He
uses that word more than anyone I've ever met. As
far as I'm concerned, there no shame in being
retarded anyway, since people in that category
can't help it. I've met some retarded folks
and they were pretty decent people; nothing like
our racist, libelous cockroach Roger Wemyss
(aka Cockroach Roger Williams).

As to what Roach Rog is trying to say in the following
rant, I have not the slightest idea. He's getting
kooky as hell:

Vulis' fake
>"Rabbi" alter ego has been spanked off the face of soc.culture.jewish
so
>many times, only a complete gibbering, moronic, empty headed black
hole of
>eternal stupidity would buy into Vulis' anti-semitic persona that he
aims
>at the vague nebulous entity of the "usenet cabal" (see the mass Kook
>Kabal spam mail that accused CAUCE, the anti-spam email mavens of
being
>anti-semitic). You stupid, STUPID little man.

Again, I have no idea what you are ranting about, but it
looks like you have been chewing on your keyboard or
something, Roach Roger.


>
> Palmjob, your final descent into being Boursy et al's

Now we get more kooky conspiracy theories from "The
Conspiracy Cockroach"!

>lapdog would be amusing if it wasn't so painfully stupid and
>embarassing to the entire human race as a whole. Your desperate

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Typical spelling error by Roach Rog Wemyss! He pounces
a plain typo of MINE, and then HE proves too ignorant
to check his own dictionary before trying to spell
"embarrassing"! This makes at least two-dozen times
that Wemyss has typo-pounced me and turned around and
made an egregious (egregious in a typo-pounce, anyway)
misspelling. If Rog is going to be a habitual typo-
pouncer, he should do like "Professor Typo-pounce
Xemblinosky"--write far less and use his dictictionary
far more often.

>lack of friends [...]

Now we are back to Cockroach Rog's old whine, "Watch
out, Palmer, I've got people on my side." Well, Roach
Wemyss, I've got the truth about YOU on MY side. That's
enough.

[...] A bit more of Roach Rog's perverted droolings
wiped away.


>> Of dissimulation, I think it was Steele who said, "Simulation
>> is a pretence of what is not; dissimulation is a concealment
>> of what is." Now, since you KNEW that perhaps only one reader
>> in one-hundred would do the investigating required to discover
>> your real name, it is plain enough that you were trying to
>> fool 99 readers out of 100 as to your real identity, Cockroach
>> Wemyss.
>
> It is plain to who, you? Funny how nobody else suffered under any
such
>pretensions, Palmjob. Then again, nobody else is quite as dim witted,
>slow moving, and myopic as you when it comes to issues of usenet and
>identity, either. You're quite literally in a class all by yourself
there,
>Patsy.
>

>> You were, it is clear, Wemyss, trying to conceal the truth from


>> a lot of readers, and thanks to the alertness of people you
>> were vilifying (other than myself) you got caught.
>
> Ah, Palmjob quickly discovers the best way to get an agreement
>is to agree with himself. Assert point A, agree with point A. Do you
have
>any idea, Palmjob, just how stupid you look agreeing with your hastily
>constructed strawmen all night long?
>
>> Another way of measuring whether a moral and ethical
>> dissimulation has in fact occurred involves determining
>> whether the accused dissembler corrects parties who are
>> clearly acting on false information based on the dis-
>> simulator's own factitious representations: I and many
>> others addressed you as "Roger Williams" on many occasions--
>> in NO instance did you correct anyone, proving beyond all
>> doubt that you are a dissembling sneak, Cockroach Roger
>> Wemyss.

I stand by that assessment as highly valid.

[...]

Another little perverted fantasy from Roach Rog
snipped out of decency. When will he and Pus Bag
realize I intend to keep their sick little daydreams
from polluting my little corner of Dejanews? Never
heard such crazy ranting, either! Wemyss is piling
loony scenarios on top of loony scenarios these days...

Bill Palmer
alt.genius.bill-palmer


wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

In <6c09br$f...@bgtnsc02.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com

("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, recently smoked out of the woods
as "Goin' Nova") grunts: [...]

My, my, how "surprising" that Louse-monkey John would
rush in to grunt on behalf of Cockroach Roger Williams.
That's a case of quasi-forger and Bill Palmer's
Parasite Number Four grunting on behalf of
Bill Palmer's Parasite Number Five! Like most
parasites, they show no respect for themselves
and their unwilling host. Also, I have already
told you how they continually pop up and
back one another up while deriding the
understandable complaints of their host.

Bill Palmer
alt.genius.bill-palmer
>

Gilbert T. Sullivan

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:

Mr. Palmer, request that you write a satire or song
about the slime of UseNet "Raoul X."
We will put it on the HFW web site.

--
In article <34B0C0...@consensus.bungmunch.edu>,
Raoul stated:
I started out on burgundy, but soon hit the harder stuff.

"Raoul F. Xemblinosky III" <rao...@jsltd.bungmunch.edu>
<33E894...@jsltd.bungmunch.edu>

Now cut that out, Dave. It's well known that I'm a lesbian.

Gilbert Vanburen Wilkes

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

Excerpts from netnews.alt.genius.bill-palmer: 13-Feb-98 (Attention)
Flame Giant by Gilbert Sullivan@irrelev

> Mr. Palmer, request that you write a satire or song
> about the slime of UseNet "Raoul X."
> We will put it on the HFW web site

"Mr. Palmer?" "Request that you ... ?" Jesus God little gilbert, you
misbegotten funnel-faced parasite, have you no dignity at ALL? i mean,
look at you!--on your knees and everything. How on EARTH do you manage
to get your tongue so FAR up palmer's ass that you can ACTUALLY lick the
boy's tonsils?


http://english-server.hss.cmu.edu/home/wilkes/


ang...@netway.com

unread,
Feb 13, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/13/98
to

In article <6c1eg9$l...@bgtnsc01.worldnet.att.net>,
zqpe...@irrelevant.not wrote:

>
> wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>
> Mr. Palmer, request that you write a satire or song
> about the slime of UseNet "Raoul X."
> We will put it on the HFW web site.
>

Sluuurrrppp.

Is this how Palmjob saves on toilet paper?

Joe Sexton

-----== Posted via Deja News, The Leader in Internet Discussion ==-----
http://www.dejanews.com/ Now offering spam-free web-based newsreading

John Davis

unread,
Feb 14, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/14/98
to

kjetil miasmusson (mia...@wanax.se) wrote:

: John Davis wrote:
: >
: > wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
: >
: > [...] [I'll just snip out Palmjob's pathetic attempt at public dick
: > stroking.]
: >
: > : There's nothing funny at all about the wilhelp thievery.
: >
: > I have to agree with you there. No matter how funny the material you

: > steal you are able to suck out the last dregs of humor before you post it
: > as yours.
: >
: > : I created wilhelp.
: >
: > No, that was David Kendrick. He paid for the domain, set up the site.
: > gave out accounts, helped set up web pages, and helped line up advertisers.
: > You had nothing at all to do with it.
: >
: > : I worked hard at my craft to make it
: >
: > It's to bad this is the best you can do then. I bet your masters are

: > pretty damn disappointed in their former apprentice. In fact I bet you
: > can't get one of them to admit you ever worked under him. I bet they get
: > together at the local craft booze joint and drink themselves into oblivion
: > trying to forget their shame. No doubt, when in their cups, they remember
: > with burning rue the lost opportunities to drop hammers or other heavy
: > objects on your head.
: >
: > : the or one of the most recognizable names on the net.
: >
: > I'm not sure what you're trying to say here so I'll pass it by. If you

: > remember and want me to point out how stupid you are for holding whatever
: > illusion you are alluding to then post clarification.
: >
: > : I made wilhelp synonymous with entertaining writing,
: >
: > Well, actually, all the writers that have flamed your ass for being a

: > useless no talent blow-hard have made it famous as a figure of fun. In
: > the sense that your incompetence has attracted interesting flames you
: > may be technically right but it was a pretty passive effort on your
: > part. I mean, you just lay there and let anyone that wants to have a
: > free kick.
: >
: > : and that is the ONLY reason the wilhelp forgers and
: > : quasi-forgers steal it.
: >
: > Steal what, Palmjob? You post it for free, no one has to steal it. In

: > fact, they are forced to take it to get to the good stuff.
: >
: > [...] [line upon line of Palmjob whining "they stole my name" expunged.]
: >
: > Don't be silly, Palmjob, who would want to steal either Palmjob or wilyelp.

: What is a palmjob, Mister davis?

It is a reference to masturbation. In Palmjob's case it is intellectual
masturbation on usenet. He has made a career out of stroking his ego in
public. He is a long winded, semi-literate, self-agrandizing blowhard
and anybodies toy that will play with him.

John Davis

unread,
Feb 14, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/14/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
: In <jrdavisE...@netcom.com> jrd...@netcom.com
: ("Pus Bag Plagiarist" John Davis) writes:
: >
: >wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:

: My, my, we can't even get past Pus Bag's Davis' first
: sentence without running into one of his hallmark
: perverted fantasies. [...] Davis' deviated drooling
: snipped, as usual.

Where is that, Palmjob? If you can't stand the heat get out of the flame
groups.

: Let's see, what does the Pus Bag Plagiarist have to


: say this time, in addition to sharing his perverted
: fantasies with us as usual?

Mostly that you are a useless little moron with a size peoblem. You are
to short to reach a mirror so you can see what a real fool looks like.

: --Oh yes, Davis announces that I stole wilhelp from


: Kendrick other than the other way around. Strange.
: Dejanews news shows that I used my famous creation
: for two and one half years before Human Leech Kendrick
: began his quasi-forgery to confuse my readers.

If someone stole something from you then call the police. In the mean
time, get it through your pointy little neural lump, Kendrick owns
wilhelp.com. He can assign user names to whom ever he wants to. The
only thing you have is a rented postbox at netcom with an address od
wil...@ix.netcom.com. That may seem unfair to you but tough shit. I
think it was unfair that I didn't win the lottery the other day but you
don't see me whining all over usenet about it.

: --Oh, yes, Pus Bag, one of the most famous slices of


: burnt toast in net history, claims that he somehow
: "flamed me".

I don't claim it, Palmjob, I do it. Unlike you I can write something
besides a pitiful "they're all picking on me, mommy" whine.

: That's it. That's the extent of Davis' latest expulsion


: of sewer gas. Not much to it...

There was enough to it to make you run for cover. You can't hide from
what I say by cutting it out, Palmjob.

Just to show you how futile you running and hiding is, I'll just attach
all the text you deleted.


-----------------Restore deleted text-------------------------------

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:

: I created wilhelp.

--

balloo

unread,
Feb 14, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/14/98
to

stuco...@webtv.net (Archie Leach) escribió en artículo:

It's the south north pole. Houses made of frozen reindeer cheese,
sled dogs for personal companionship and Oslo, the home of the Bill
Palmer Fan Club. Despite decades of eugenic sterilizations attempting
to remove the detritus from the sub-human sub-arctic gene pool,
Lapland del Sol still has one of the highest incidences per capita of
Palmjobism in the world.

Hope this helped.

--
coochie coo alt.alien.vampire.flonk.flonk.flonk
ben capoeman mhm 15x1 wsd10 balloo at wilhelp dot com
jelliebun's dainty ursine of delight meow
http://www.blarg.net/~balloo/flonk/index.html meow

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 14, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/14/98
to

In <jrdavisE...@netcom.com> jrd...@netcom.com (John Davis)
writes:
>
>wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>: In <jrdavisE...@netcom.com> jrd...@netcom.com
>: ("Pus Bag Plagiarist" John Davis) writes:
>: >
>: >wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>
>: My, my, we can't even get past Pus Bag's Davis' first
>: sentence without running into one of his hallmark
>: perverted fantasies. [...] Davis' deviated drooling
>: snipped, as usual.
>
>Where is that,

Pus Bag continues to insult eveyone named Palmer
in Davis' low fashion:

Palmjob? If you can't stand the heat get out of the flame
>groups.
>
>: Let's see, what does the Pus Bag Plagiarist have to
>: say this time, in addition to sharing his perverted
>: fantasies with us as usual?
>
>Mostly that you are a useless little moron with a size peoblem. You
are
>to short to reach a mirror so you can see what a real fool looks like.
>
>: --Oh yes, Davis announces that I stole wilhelp from
>: Kendrick other than the other way around. Strange.
>: Dejanews news shows that I used my famous creation
>: for two and one half years before Human Leech Kendrick
>: began his quasi-forgery to confuse my readers.
>
>If someone stole something from you then call the police.

Sometimes you merely alert people about the thief, but
since I have already posted, "Little Leeches on the
Internet" I won't repost it now. Many more articles
are in the works at the busy, original Wilhelp Company
(my proprietorship) Pus Bag. Read 'em and weep as they
appear...

In the mean >time, get it through your pointy little neural lump,
Kendrick owns
>wilhelp.com.

So? If he bought a domain name he has a domain name.
Only. In no way did he buy the right to remove any
of the customary provileges of the creator of the
name, or of the person who made it famous as a sign
of entertaining writing, BEFORE Kendrick and the
other quasi-forgers began to dilute the name with
their drivel--aimed at confusing the readers and
nothing else.

Further, since Human Leech David Kendrick's ONLY
purpose in buying the domain name was a (publicly
stated) malicious one, it is very unlikely he
would be able to defend his use of wilhelp
if challenged. The courts tend to take a dim
view of actions performed for purely malicious
purposes.

He can assign user names to whom ever he wants to

The only thing you have is a rented postbox at netcom with an address
od
>wil...@ix.netcom.com. That may seem unfair to you but tough shit.

No, it isn't "unfair"; it is the spiteful fantasy of
an envious sore-losing parasite named Pus Bag Davis.

Fact is, I created wilhelp. I made it famous on the
net, and made it a symbol of amusing writing for two-
and-one-half years before Human Leech Kendrick came
alon. YOU may want to qeustion how I can prove it
was famous: The huge volume of follow-ups I have
received to wilhelp articles is a very good
indicator of that.

Wilhelp is part of my copyrighted net-entertainment
persona. Further, it is embedded deep within my
copyrighted righted property, in such expressions
as "Keep clickin' on 'wilhelp' folks!" None of
this is dependent on any one ISP, so Pus Bag is
full of shit with his "only a rented mailbox"
notion. I have many future plans for wilhelp
that are not in any way dependent on any
particular screen name, domain name, or ISP.

I
>think it was unfair that I didn't win the lottery the other day but
you

>do't see me whining all over usenet about it.

Pus Bag keeps hinting that when you buy a domain
name you buy the customary rights and privileges
of others who have created the name and made it
famous.

Pus Bag is full of sewer gas, as usual. Apparently Davis
thinks that all those folks who were getting the domain
names in imitation of Coca Cola, MacDonalds, and so
on now OWN those businesses! Pus Bag Davis needs
to learn the difference between "domain name",
"name" (in general),"entertainment persona", and
"business".

Above all, at the risk of being repetitious, "When
ou buy a domain name you get a domain name." ONLY.
In fact, when those people who registered famous names
were challenged in the courts, they did not get to keep
using the domain names anyway--though in some cases, the
companies paid them off with a few thousand bucks to get
them to stop using the domain name, merely because that
was cheaper than taking the name-leeches to court.

I have an even better case. It is questionable how
much Coca Cola is hurt by someone having a Coca
Cola domain name, as long as the "name-leech" is
not actually producing a cola drink. On the other
hand, many of the wilhelp quasi-forgers are actually
fooling readers into thinking I wrote the leeches'
drivel, thereby diluting a name I made--through my
honest writing efforts--a famous symbol of
entertaining writing on the net.

[As usual, Pus Bag Davis, one of the top three "Palmer's
parasites", knocks my writing, though he was busted on
several notable occasions for plagiarizing it, and
though after thousands of tries, he has yet to post
a notable article, or even a memorable subject line!]

>
>: --Oh, yes, Pus Bag, one of the most famous slices of
>: burnt toast in net history, claims that he somehow
>: "flamed me".

>: That's it. That's the extent of Davis' latest expulsion


>: of sewer gas. Not much to it...

Keep clickin' on the GENUINE wilhelp, folks!

wilhelp
alt.genius.bill-palmer


polt...@wilhelp.com

unread,
Feb 14, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/14/98
to

In newsgroup alt.genius.bill-palmer, post
<6c3k7a$n...@sjx-ixn2.ix.netcom.com>,wil...@ix.netcom.com () wrote:

>The courts tend to take a dim
>view of actions performed for purely malicious
>purposes.

They do, however, approve of actions performed to pull the tail of
pompous buffoons like wilyelp.

>I have many future plans for wilhelp
>that are not in any way dependent on any
>particular screen name, domain name, or ISP.

That's nice, Palmy; so do we.

>Pus Bag keeps hinting that when you buy a domain
>name you buy the customary rights and privileges
>of others who have created the name and made it
>famous.

Yep; and I'm sure David Kendrick will be defending the rights of all
users of the @wilhelp.com domain.

>Above all, at the risk of being repetitious,

Heavens! You wouldn't want to be repetitious, would you, Palmjob?

>Keep clickin' on the GENUINE wilhelp, folks!

Click. Click. Click. Hmmm, seems to take me to <www.wilhelp.com>.
Strange.

--
Rubbing the Kook Kabal's noses in their
own shit is not only fun, it's a duty.
"All non-hostile reactions are more than welcome and most
especially yours Mr. Palmer. I've long admired your style
and devotion to free speech." - (Speedbump to Palmjob).
All loon-related email to "polt...@wilhelp.com"

John Davis

unread,
Feb 14, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/14/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
: In <jrdavisE...@netcom.com> jrd...@netcom.com (John Davis)
: writes:

[...] [Filler snipped]

: >In the mean time, get it through your pointy little neural lump,
: >Kendrick owns wilhelp.com.

: So? If he bought a domain name he has a domain name.
: Only. In no way did he buy the right to remove any
: of the customary provileges of the creator of the

: name, [...]

No one says it does; in fact that has not occured. You have the same
rights as you always have to make a fool of yourself. In fact, it is
highly encourged. You may post as you always have.

[...] [Repetitive drivel snipped.]

: >He can assign user names to whom ever he wants to


: >The only thing you have is a rented postbox at netcom with an address

: >of wil...@ix.netcom.com. That may seem unfair to you but tough shit.

: No, it isn't "unfair";

I'm glad the message is finally getting through to you.

: it is the spiteful fantasy of an envious sore-losing parasite named Pus
: Bag Davis.

It's not a dream, Spanky; like it or not, that's the way it is.

: Fact is, I created wilhelp. [...]

No, you didn't. You rented an e-mail address from netcom and chose
wilhelp as a user ID. That's all you did.

[...] [more repetitive drivel snipped.]

: >I think it was unfair that I didn't win the lottery the other day but


: >you do't see me whining all over usenet about it.

: Pus Bag keeps hinting that when you buy a domain
: name you buy the customary rights and privileges
: of others who have created the name and made it
: famous.

I'm not "hinting" at that or anything else, Spanky. I'm stating simple
facts.

1) David Kendrick owns wilhelp.com.
2) He can assign userids in that domain to whom ever he wants.
3) He can sell advertising spce on the donains web server to whom ever he
wants.
4) It is none of your business and there is nothing you can do about it.

I have never said you have any less rights than you always have had. You
can continue making a fool of yourself to your hearts delight.

[...] [Even more repetitious and ignorant drivel snipped.]

Goin' Nova

unread,
Feb 14, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/14/98
to

In article <34E3D3...@wanax.se>, kjetil miasmusson <mia...@wanax.se> wrote:

> Goin' Nova wrote:
> >
> > In article <6c0159$l...@dfw-ixnews8.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com ()

> > wrote:
> >
> > > In <6buk84$e...@enews2.newsguy.com> Roger Williams
> > > <rog...@shell1.tiac.net> writes:
> > > >
> > > >wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
> > > >> In <6bu0td$f...@enews1.newsguy.com> Cockroach Roger Wemyss
> > > >> <rog...@shell1.tiac.net> aka "Cockroach Roger Williams" writes:
> > > >> >
> > > >> >Lionel Lauer <nos...@sexzilla.net> wrote:
> > > >> >> Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
> > > >> >
> > > >> >> >Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
> > > >> >> >writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
> > > >> >
> > > >> >> *blink*
> > > >> >
> > > >> >> Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
> > >
> > > The thousands of people whose follow-ups to my articles
> > > are archived in Dejanews prove a great many people "read
> > > my stuff".
> >

> > Good. give us a precise count. I doubt you make to ONE thousand,
> > let alone plural thousands. Especially when there are so many <snicker>
> > of me. And, FWIW, not everyone who responds to your posts read them.
> > Or has any desire to...
> >

> > > If you can use Dejanews, I scarcely need to
> > > waste my writing time preparing a listing of thousands
> > > of certified wilhelp readers.
> > >
> >

> > IOW, he can't. And, most anyone who admits to being a wilhelp reader
> > certainly is certifiable...
>
> Now that I looked at the deja news archive, I am a wilhelp Palmer
> reader what do you think of that?

Sweden has a shortage of sleep inducing agents.

Goin' Nova

unread,
Feb 14, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/14/98
to

In article <6c1b3q$o...@dfw-ixnews3.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com ()
wrote:

> In <6c09br$f...@bgtnsc02.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com

Quick! Can anyone tell me Palmer's opinion on eliminating all text of the
person you're responding to? <snicker>

Question: Does the OED print Palmjob's picture under the definition of
hypocrite?

Goin' Nova

unread,
Feb 14, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/14/98
to

In article <6bmd3a$p...@sjx-ixn1.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com () wrote:

> In <wotanEo...@netcom.com> wotan...@netcom.com (Wotan) writes:
> >
> >In article <6blf0d$k...@dfw-ixnews12.ix.netcom.com>,

> > <wil...@ix.netcom.com> wrote:
> >
> >>Further, it is interesting to note that
> >>so far, the only people who have seen fit to make light
> >>of my concerns about the recent complete forgeries of my
> >>screen name and address are the "wilhelp" quasi-forgers
> >>and parasites, like MacLennan here.
> >
> >Fuck You
>

> And of course, the famous Dumpster Rodent insults
> everyone named Palmer:
>
> Palmjob.

And then you go and do it. <snicker> Or are you fucking with attributions
again? Better be careful Biil, with you claiming "quasi-forgeries" it will be
difficult, nay impossible, to avoid plagiarizing claims if you 'borrow' other
people's words. <snicker>

> >
> >BTW, wil...@netcom.com is a valid address that anyone can get if YOU
> do
> >not already have it.
>

> Listen, Wotan, you malicious little liar. The forgery that
> I was complianing about as a "full forgery" was "wilhelp@ix.
> netcom.com". The others I carefully pointed out as being
> quasi-forgeries, and they certainly are that, even if YOU
> need to look up the meaning of "quasi". "Quasi-forgery"
> is the precise term for something like "wil...@netcom.com"
> and that is EXACTLY what I will continue to denounce it as.

And you, having strayed too close to Boursey/Gru-bore are a Quisling.
<snicker>

>
> Further, I'm of no mind [...]

That's never been in doubt

> Anyway, whether YOU like it or not, *I* will continue to consider
> any use of "wilhelp" (that plainly aims at confusing the readers)
> to be parasitical and a moral and ethical forgery, at least. I
> scarcely need advice from The Dumpster Rodent on that.

Wouldn't be up to Wotan anyway. Ratcliffe is the one you have
to have permission from... <snicker>

Goin' Nova

unread,
Feb 14, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/14/98
to

In article <6c13e4$j...@dfw-ixnews8.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com ()
wrote:

> In <6c0bq0$5...@bgtnsc02.worldnet.att.net> lousem...@wilhelp.com


> ("Louse-monkey John" Hausmann, recently smoked out of the woods

> here he was cowering as "Goin' Nova") grunts:
> >
> >In article <6bue90$r...@sjx-ixn2.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com


> () wrote:
> >
> >> In <34e84215...@enews.newsguy.com> nos...@sexzilla.net (Lionel
> >> Lauer) writes:
> >> >

> >> >Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
> >> >
> >> >>Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
> >> >>writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
> >> >
> >> >*blink*
> >> >
> >> >Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
> >>

> >> Bitterness, Lionel, it will eat your heart out sooner
> >> or later.
> >
> >Take from the expert, he knows. <snicker>
>
> Still bitter for getting "The Spankiest Spank Ever Spanked"
> eh, Louse-monkey? (For details, readers are referred to
> last month's original article beginning the long thread
> under that famous subject line.)

Still laughing.

> >
> >> Fact is, I don't need to "name" anyone who
> >> "wants to read my stuff". If you will start checking
> >> through Dejanews, you will find irrefutable evidence of
> >> literally several thousand people who not only have
> >> "read my stuff" but have followed me up.
> >>
> >
> >And I say you're lying.
>
> And why should the readers care what one of my leading
> parasites drools, Louse-monkey? People know that leeches
> such as yourself never respect their unwilling hosts.
>

What's to respect? You're a pompous, overbearing, long-winded
fuckhead.

> And Dejanews proves it. But you still think
> >the .sig file hit thousands of newsgroups. That pretty much sums
> >up your problem,
>
> And of course the Louse-monkey wilhelp leech WOULD
> insult everyone name Palmer:
>

Hypocrite. Explain the etymology of "lousemonkey". <snicker>

> Palmjob, you're always an order of magnitude
> >wrong.
>
> Take it from one of the most famous parasite's
> on the net, eh, Louse-monkey?
> >
> >> Based on conventional means of estimating ratios for
> >> "readers-to-followers-up", that indicates many, many
> >> thousands of people read my articles regularly. On
> >> the other hand, if you want to think that people would
> >> pass up a twenty new "wilhelps" to read one "genuine
> >> Lionel", you are welcome to your own illusions.
> >>
> >
> >Yeah, Binky, and how many times have you bought the
> >Golden Gate bridge?
>
> In other words, the REALLY famous writer is Louse-
> monkey John, who has followed up literally hundreds
> of my original articles with his drivel, when, on
> the other hand, I have almost never followed up an
> orignal article by him, since he has so little talent
> he is nearly incapable of producing an orignal article
> in the first place! So of course, Hausmann has MUCH to
> say about his unwilling "host". Louse-monkey is stalker
> and a typically ungrateful leech.

Interesting term. Almost never. heheh. Even more interesting is that
the moron has complained that I'm "quasi-forging" him. So,
logic dictates that his opinion of me is his opinion of him. <snicker>

Nice auto-flame, fuckwit.


> >
> ><snicker>
> >
> >You couldn't estimate the number of fingers on your hands, without
> >help from someone else.
>
> Oh sure, that's right right: It is Louse-monkey Hausmann who
> has written all the famous original articles starting all those
> long threads that countless folks have replied on. Gosh,
> I had the thing backwards, somehow...

Uh, Biil, estimation requires skills you have not, and I suspect cannot,
displayed. But your response "clealy" refutes me. <bwhahahahahahah
haahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah>

Moron.


And what, pray tell is "right right"? The opposite of "left right"? <snicker>


> >
> >> By the way, the fact that I never heard of YOU until
> >> YOU followed ME up on this thread says something too.
> >
> >It says you ought to get out more.
>
> No, it says YOU should get a life and stop
> sucking my blood, Louse-monkey John. It says
> you have no talent and originality, so you affix
> yourself like some hideous barnacle-mutation
> on someone who does (me), Hausmann.

Does it upset you Biil? Then I shall continue till it no longer does. <snicker>

> >
> >> Only please spare me the weasly, "I don't read you, I
> >> just follow you up." I know better. It's an excuse
> >> of the feeble and it insults the intelligence. I mean,
> >> hey, let's ALL start following up people we don't read,
> >> just to "improve the newsgroup chaos"! Right, Lionel?
>
> Lionel Lauer
> Under wilhelp power,
> Got to keep lookin'
> Just to see what's cookin'...

Bill Palmer
Usenet's embalmer,
simply cannot be read,
end result: you're dead.

Mike MacLennan

unread,
Feb 14, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/14/98
to

wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>
> In <34ea35f9...@enews.newsguy.com> nos...@sexzilla.net (Lionel
> Lauer) writes:
> >
> >Quoth wotan...@netcom.com (The Dumpster Rodent) beebled:
> >
> >>In article <34e84215...@enews.newsguy.com>,

> >>Lionel Lauer <nos...@sexzilla.net> wrote:
> >>
> >>>Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
> >>>
> >>>>Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
> >>>>writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
> >>>
> >>>*blink*
> >>>
> >>>Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
> >>
> >>Too easy:
> >>
> >>wil...@ix.netcom.com
> >>
> >>What do I win?
> >
> >Nothing - he's not a person[0]. ;)
> >
> >[0] My theory is that he's the result of somebody running a thesaurus
> >program, a spam engine & Eliza on a Windoze 95 box, which promptly
> >crashed & melded the programs together in an unholy & terrifying
> >synergy.
>
> Well, there's another interesting speculation...I like it
> better than the one about my being the sixty-five year old
> Avon lady getting her jollies, or the one about the pimply,
> nineteen-year old, 400 pound male with "soda bottle-bottoms"
> eye glasses who lies on his mattress and stuffs himself with
> stale doughnuts all day. See what else you can come up with...

The truth. That your posting time comes from your *wonderful*
association with the good folks at Amway.
--
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-M i k e M a c L e n n a n -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

mmaclenn[SHIFT+2]ix.netcom.com defame[SHIFT+2]wilhelp.com

Want fame? Say something stupid to reserve your space below.

Don't bother asking me to "post proof" for my "suspicians";
THAT is the sort of unreasonable request favored by the
"Louse-monkeys" and the "Lousy MacLemons" (providing
they are indeed different crude entities) of the net.

Biil Palmer chiding others for daring to ask him to back up
his arguments in <65acb7$d...@dfw-ixnews9.ix.netcom.com>

Goin' Nova

unread,
Feb 14, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/14/98
to

In article <6c5tih$5...@dfw-ixnews10.ix.netcom.com>, wil...@ix.netcom.com
() wrote:

Well, I assume Biil's around 37-38 and still being turned down by girls
half his age. Biil couldnt' catch a clue in a vat of glue. Can you say
'Monica', Biil? I know you can...

Matthew Ashman

unread,
Feb 15, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/15/98
to

Wotan wrote:
>
> In article <34E3D2...@wanax.se>,
> kjetil miasmusson <mia...@wanax.se> wrote while drinking:
> Dave's not a big enough fool. a.g.b-p was created in the same spirit as
> Palmjob's other newsgroups were. alt.worst.of.usenet and
> alt.sex.masturbation.bill-palmer were not subtle enough to make Palmjob
> think he was being "honored". <snicker>

How many news groups are named after Palm Job, anyways?

Lionel Lauer

unread,
Feb 15, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/15/98
to

Quoth wotan...@netcom.com (Wotan) :

>In article <34e84215...@enews.newsguy.com>,
>Lionel Lauer <nos...@sexzilla.net> wrote while drinking:


>
>>Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
>>
>>>Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
>>>writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
>>
>>*blink*
>>
>>Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
>
>Too easy:
>
>wil...@ix.netcom.com
>
>What do I win?

Nothing - he's not a person[0]. ;)

[0] My theory is that he's the result of somebody running a thesaurus
program, a spam engine & Eliza on a Windoze 95 box, which promptly
crashed & melded the programs together in an unholy & terrifying
synergy.

Lionel.
--
W Lionel Lauer - Now demunged for your emailing pleasure.
. | ,. w , "Some people are alive only because
\|/ \|/ it is illegal to kill them." Perna condita delenda est
---^----^---------------------------------------------------------------

Lionel Lauer

unread,
Feb 15, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/15/98
to

Quoth wotan...@netcom.com (Wotan) :

>In article <6buj6p$n...@sjx-ixn2.ix.netcom.com>,
> <wil...@ix.netcom.com> wrote while drinking:


>
>>I made wilhelp synonymous with entertaining writing,
>

>Must be why one of the worst flames in the writing groups is "You are
>likely to be the next wilhelp"

<wince!>
That's *cruel*, they don't really say that, do they?
How many beginning writers have suicided after being told that?

wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 15, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/15/98
to

In <34E633...@disasters.com> Matthew Ashman <mas...@disasters.com>
writes:
>
>The Dumpster Rodent (Wotan) beebled:

>>
>> In article <34E3D2...@wanax.se>,
>> kjetil miasmusson <mia...@wanax.se> wrote while drinking:
>>
>> >Dave Ratcliffe wrote:
>> >>
>> >> In<34E26F...@wanax.se>, kjetil miasmusson <mia...@wanax.se>
wrote:
>> >> |
>> >> |Who is this wilhelp person we are taliking about?

For the best clue you can find in one article, read
"Facts in the Case of Bill Plamer" (the original article
on the thread, of course) by Bill Palmer.


>> >> |
>> >> |-----kjetil
>> >>
>> >> Y'know, when it comes right down to it this really says it all.
>> >>
>> >> Poor Bill. The knowledge that there is a sentient being on the
net who never
>> >> heard of him will drive him over the edge.

Not at all. Common sense tells me there's still
a few of 'em out there. We're working on the
problem now.


>> >>
>> >> But will we be able to tell when it happens?
>> >
>> >I have looked in deja news about wilhelp Palmer. I never heard of
>> >you eather, but you do not have your own newsgroup, I noticed.

That was an excellent point, I msut say.


>>
>> Dave's not a big enough fool.

Nonesense. Ratcliffe lacks the brains needed for pounding
sand into a rathole, so just what would he do with a
newsgroup named for him in the innovative alt.genius
hierarchy? That's why he tried his damndest to kill
alt.genius.bill-palmer in the "crib" (before he got
"bit").

You see, Ratcliffe had previously exerted himself to demean
my writing efforts and yet suddenly this new newsgroup
alt.genius.bill-palmer is being created and propogated
like lightning around the planet! On top of that, he
soon finds out that I had nothing to do with that creation
process. Just imagine the pitiful attempts to comprehend,
going on in that feeble "Ratcliffian" noggin....the wheels
spinning around and getting him no place... He STILL
hasn't gotten the thing figured out, but he continues
to come up with a wild speculation every month or so.

This (below) represents a typically biased and ignorant
guess by the uninformed and unknowing:

>> a.g.b-p was created in the same spirit as
>> Palmjob's other newsgroups were. alt.worst.of.usenet and
>> alt.sex.masturbation.bill-palmer were not subtle enough to make
Palmjob
>> think he was being "honored". <snicker>
>

>How many news groups are named after Palm Job, anyways.

The name's Palmer, mannerless churl. That's P-A-L-M-E-R!.
Now that you have been rapped across the knuckles for
your bad breeding, I will answer your question:
I have noticed up to one-dozen bogus "Bill Palmer"
newsgroups, maybe more, floating around the net at
one time or another. The only legitimate Bill Palmer
newsgroup is alt.genius.bill-palmer.

The many so-called "Bill Palmer newsgroups" are simply
cheap ripoffs started by people who were envious that
there can be only be ONE brand new newsgroup in a brand
new, innovative hierarchy, and alt.genius.bill-palmer
was picked for that high honor.

Fact is, I had nothing at all to do with the newsgroup
creation process, but my investigations revealed that
a.g.b-p was created properly in all aspects, and was
well on the way to world-wide propogation, so I came
aboard, and have stayed on as a regular. We were the
Dejanews-verifiably most active and popular NEW Usenet
newsgroup for 1997, with well over 20,000 postings!
We have been mentioned in the media frequently, and
as one journalist reported, "...alt.genius.bill-palmer
is not a newsgroup but a net phenomenon."

Further, for your general iformation, there is NO
legitimate "Bill Palmer" webiste at this time.
(That is, there may be other people named Bill
Palmer who have websites, but there is no
legitimate website at this time operated by
Bill wilhelp Palmer, the world champion of
flaming who performs for net readers in flame
newsgroups as "The Flame Giant" and "wilhelp".)

Any websites purporting to have any connection
with me are bogus. The only place to get factual
information about my Usenet writing is in my own
<wil...@ix.netcom.com> corner of the Dejanews
archive. Unfortunately, due the forgeries I am
protesting on this thread, you can expect to find
a few fake messages even there, so even if
someone refers you by Message ID to Dejanews for
an article I supposedly wrote, you can't be sure
it is mine unless you ask me.

Sadly, that's one of the problems created by net
forgers, and we just have todeal with I guess, since
I am still awaiting word from the Federal Prosecutor's
office as to whether or not I will be able to have
them arrested.

If you have any more questions about Bill Palmer,
wilhelp, or The Internet Flame Giant, please feel
free to ask them in the ONLY legitimate Bill Palmer
newsgroup, alt.genius.bill-palmer, but I do ask you
to mind your manners. Thanking you in advance for
your anticipated courtesy.

wilhelp
alt.genius.bill-palmer


wil...@ix.netcom.com

unread,
Feb 15, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/15/98
to

In <34eb37a7...@enews.newsguy.com> nos...@sexzilla.net (Lionel

Lauer) writes:
>
>Quoth wotan...@netcom.com (The Dumpster Rodent) beebled:
>
>>In article <6buj6p$n...@sjx-ixn2.ix.netcom.com>,

>> <wil...@ix.netcom.com> wrote:
>>
>>>I made wilhelp synonymous with entertaining writing,
>>
>>Must be why one of the worst flames in the writing groups is "You are

>>likely to be the next wilhelp"
>
><wince!>
>That's *cruel*, they don't really say that, do they?
>How many beginning writers have suicided after being told that?


Oh sure, sure, the joke makes heaps o' sense! After all,
you only have a few dozen people making it look like
their posts were written by Bill "wilhelp" Palmer. Hey,
I don't mind jokes, but the best ones need some tie
with reality. How about this one, Lionel?


Poster One: "So how come you are using wil...@wilhelp.com
on all your postings these days?

Poster Two: "Well, I wanted to be sure my brilliant article-
gems were not confused by anyone for the writings
of Bill Palmer, and after considering all the
possible screen names available to me, I chose
this one. Pretty clever of me, huh? I mean
who the hell would want to be associated with
THAT guy?"


You see, Lionel, a good joke, as I said, needs to have
some basis in reality...

Lionel Lauer
Under wilhelp power--
He's got to keep lookin',


Just to see what's cookin'...

wilhelp

wil...@ix.netcom.com

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Feb 15, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/15/98
to

In <34ea35f9...@enews.newsguy.com> nos...@sexzilla.net (Lionel

Lauer) writes:
>
>Quoth wotan...@netcom.com (The Dumpster Rodent) beebled:
>
>>In article <34e84215...@enews.newsguy.com>,

>>Lionel Lauer <nos...@sexzilla.net> wrote:
>>
>>>Quoth wil...@ix.netcom.com () :
>>>
>>>>Even so, there will other people, not very familiar with my
>>>>writing but who want to read something by Bill Palmer, whom
>>>
>>>*blink*
>>>
>>>Name one person on Usenet who *wants* to read your stuff.
>>
>>Too easy:
>>
>>wil...@ix.netcom.com
>>
>>What do I win?
>
>Nothing - he's not a person[0]. ;)
>
>[0] My theory is that he's the result of somebody running a thesaurus
>program, a spam engine & Eliza on a Windoze 95 box, which promptly
>crashed & melded the programs together in an unholy & terrifying
>synergy.

Well, there's another interesting speculation...I like it


better than the one about my being the sixty-five year old
Avon lady getting her jollies, or the one about the pimply,
nineteen-year old, 400 pound male with "soda bottle-bottoms"
eye glasses who lies on his mattress and stuffs himself with
stale doughnuts all day. See what else you can come up with...

Lionel Lauer

polt...@wilhelp.com

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Feb 15, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/15/98
to

In newsgroup alt.genius.bill-palmer, post
<6c5rb7$j...@sjx-ixn5.ix.netcom.com>,wil...@ix.netcom.com () wrote:

>Fact is, I had nothing at all to do with the newsgroup
>creation process, but my investigations revealed that
>a.g.b-p was created properly in all aspects, and was
>well on the way to world-wide propogation, so I came
>aboard, and have stayed on as a regular. We were the
>Dejanews-verifiably most active and popular NEW Usenet
>newsgroup for 1997, with well over 20,000 postings!
>We have been mentioned in the media frequently, and
>as one journalist reported, "...alt.genius.bill-palmer
>is not a newsgroup but a net phenomenon."

Cites, Palmjob, cites. What media and which journalist?

>Further, for your general iformation, there is NO
>legitimate "Bill Palmer" webiste at this time.

Sure there is; just keep clicking on <www.wilhelp.com>, folkes.

>Sadly, that's one of the problems created by net
>forgers, and we just have todeal with I guess, since
>I am still awaiting word from the Federal Prosecutor's
>office as to whether or not I will be able to have
>them arrested.

Snort! On what charge, Palmjob?

>If you have any more questions about Bill Palmer,
>wilhelp, or The Internet Flame Giant, please feel
>free to ask them in the ONLY legitimate Bill Palmer
>newsgroup, alt.genius.bill-palmer, but I do ask you
>to mind your manners. Thanking you in advance for
>your anticipated courtesy.
>
>wilhelp

>www.wilhelp.com

polt...@wilhelp.com

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Feb 15, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/15/98
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polt...@wilhelp.com

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Feb 15, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/15/98
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Nostradamus

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Feb 16, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/16/98
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On 15 Feb 1998 04:35:51 GMT, wil...@ix.netcom.com () wrote:

>Sadly, that's one of the problems created by net
>forgers, and we just have todeal with I guess, since
>I am still awaiting word from the Federal Prosecutor's
>office as to whether or not I will be able to have
>them arrested.

Peekaboo!

--
Nostr...@wilhelp.com
Yet another Palmjob classic,
<6c5rb7$j...@sjx-ixn5.ix.netcom.com>

The seWer raT

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Feb 16, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/16/98
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In article <6c3k7a$n...@sjx-ixn2.ix.netcom.com>, Idiot Poltroon
(wil...@ix.netcom.com ()) wrote:> > In <jrdavisE...@netcom.com>

jrd...@netcom.com (John Davis)> writes: > >> >wil...@ix.udpcom.com wrote:>
>: In <jrdavisE...@netcom.com> jrd...@netcom.com > >: ("Pus Bag
Plagiarist" John Davis) writes: > >: >> >: >pal...@ix.netcom.com wrote:> >>
>: My, my, we KKKan't even get past Pus Bag's Davis' first> >: sentence
without running into one of his hallmarKKK> >: perverted fantasies. [...]

Davis' deviated drooling> >: snipped, as usual.> >> >Where is that, > > Pus
Bag continues to insult eveyone named Palmer> in Davis' low fashion:> >
Palmjob? If you can't stand the heat get out of the flame > >groups. > >>
>: Let's see, what does the Pus Bag Plagiarist have to> >: say this time, in
addition to sharing his perverted> >: fantasies with us as usual?> >> >Mostly
that you are a useless little moron with a size peoblem. You> are > >to
short to reach a mirror so you can see what a real fool looks like.> >> >:
--Oh yes, Davis announces that I stole wilhelp from> >: Kendrick other than
the other way around. Strange.> >: Dejanews news shows that I used my famous
creation > >: for two and one half years before Human Leech Kendrick> >:
began his quasi-forgery to confuse my readers.> >> >If someone stole
something from you then call the police.> > Sometimes you merely alert people
about the thief, but > since I have already posted, "Little Leeches on the >
Internet" I won't repost it now. Many more articles> are in the works at the
busy, original Wilhelp KKKompany> (my proprietorship) Pus Bag. Read 'em and
weep as they > appear...here are some of the working> subject headers for
these articles:>> "Rec.arts.prose and the kike problem"> "Boursy's
blackface makeup gives me morning wood"> "WetbacKKKs deserve to make $1.10
an hour> "Human Grease Spot Raoul Xemblinosky is at it again"> "Why Jews
can't ski"How touching, Palmjob...> > In the mean >time, get it through

John Davis

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Feb 16, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/16/98
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Wotan (wotan...@netcom.com) wrote:
: In article <6c140m$6...@sjx-ixn8.ix.netcom.com>,
: <wil...@ix.netcom.com> wrote while drinking:

: >In <jrdavisE...@netcom.com> jrd...@netcom.com

: >("Pus Bag Plagiarist" John Davis) writes:
: >>

: >>wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
: >
: >My, my, we can't even get past Pus Bag's Davis' first
: >sentence without running into one of his hallmark
: >perverted fantasies.

: He's go you John. You know damned well Palmjob is incapble of writing
: anything at all. In fact, his postings often resemble the results from
: those monkeys working at reporducing Shakespeare.

That's why he hates my "hallmark perverted fantasies" so much, they're
the only thing worth reading in a wilyelp post.

Colonel Editor in chief

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Feb 16, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/16/98
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Gilbert T. Sullivan wrote:

> wil...@ix.netcom.com wrote:
>
>
> Mr. Palmer, request that you write a satire or song
> about the slime of UseNet "Raoul X."
> We will put it on the HFW web site.
>

DYOFDW, illiterate moron.


Goin' Nova

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Feb 16, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/16/98
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In article <34E8F65A...@wilhelp.com>, Colonel Editor in chief
<fu...@wilhelp.com> wrote:

it's not that he's unwilling to do it, he's unable to do it.

Archie Leach

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Feb 16, 1998, 3:00:00 AM2/16/98
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Well it seems that My Deja News isn't
quite Mine yet...

Archie Leach

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