Top Ten Signs You've Been Playing Marathon Too Long

[William J Anderson]

In article <3huos9$e...@newsbf02.news.aol.com>, afc...@aol.com (AFC Chip) wrote:

> >>Top Ten Signs You've Been Playing Marathon Too Long:
> >>
> >>10. You feel the urge to shoot co-workers who wear green jumpsuits
> >>
> >> ...
> >>
> >>1. Two words: Jason Wannabe.
>
>
> I still think that having dreams of playing Marathon levels with
> regenerating aliens and no pattern buffers or teleport pads belongs on
> there...

No, cause I've gone beyond that.

Before I got Marathon I started to have "weeded" dreams.

To explain. I'm a waiter at TGI Friday's. "Weeded" is jargon for being so
busy you can't even think of what you came into the kitchen to get. As in
"in the weeds" like you're "swimming" (another useful bit of nomeclature
for the same thing) in a lake, and being tangled in seaweed.

So I was having dreams that I was waiting on a 150 table station about
half a mile long and everyone wanted refills on their diet cokes.

Then I got marathon.

You know what happens now?

I have dreams that I have to get refills for every compiler in a 150 table
station about a half a mile long, where all the walls and furnishings are
3-d textured, and I can only look down or up 45 degrees, have an assult
rifle barrel always in my field of vision, and every time I come to a door
I have to press the tab key in panic to get it to open.

And yes, I do sidestep around the corners in case someone throws the pizza
that wasn't "gourmet and crispy like the menu says" at me.

[LL Cool JB]

Hey, y'all...

I missed the original Top Ten list somehow... does anyone have it around
to re-post or E-mail to me?

Thanks...

Jonathan