Cats eat dead owners?
Polar
This crops up once in a while; have just seen it on another NG
that says there are "stories in the paper about this all the time".
I've never seen one, and I don't think my cat would eat my
corpse, because she only likes fresh food. Turns her nose up at
anything that's been down too long. By the time she figured out there
was no fresh dinner coming, I might stink too much.
I assume the UL means if the cat can't get out to forage.
An excellent argument in favor of keeping the cat door open.
--
Polar
Nathan Tenny
Polar <sme...@mindspring.com> wrote:
>
> This crops up once in a while; have just seen it on another NG
>that says there are "stories in the paper about this all the time".
We had a fairly credible news account a few months ago, about a guy who
died in his house, alone except for the cats, and wasn't found (by humans)
for a Reeeeal Looonnnnnggg Tiiiiime. I can't for the life of me find the
thread at (ugh) deja.com, though---it looks as though they decided that
no one *really* wants a Usenet archive that goes back more than a few
months.
> I've never seen one, and I don't think my cat would eat my
>corpse, because she only likes fresh food. Turns her nose up at
>anything that's been down too long. By the time she figured out there
>was no fresh dinner coming, I might stink too much.
She might change her mind if the only alternative were starvation. And
then again she might not---there are certainly differences of personality
among cats. (No, that's not an invitation for everyone to describe theirs.
I'm shutting up about my cats (mostly), you do the same about yourn.)
> An excellent argument in favor of keeping the cat door open.
Not in my neighborhood. Any cat that goes outdoors freely might as well
be laid out on a plate with a sprig of parsley for the coyotes. They'd have
a better chance of surviving by eating me until rescued.
NT
--
Nathan Tenny | Words I carry in my pocket, where they
Qualcomm, Inc., San Diego, CA | breed like white mice.
<nten...@qualcomm.com> | - Lawrence Durrell
Robert Warinner
: I've never seen one, and I don't think my cat would eat my
: corpse, because she only likes fresh food. Turns her nose up at
: anything that's been down too long. By the time she figured out there
: was no fresh dinner coming, I might stink too much.
The alt.folklore.urban FAQ[1] sez:
T.* Days-old body in home discovered headless. Was eaten by dog!
The Nathan Hale means there is an article on the entry at TAFKAC[2]:
http://www.urbanlegends.com/animals/dog_eats_mans_head.html
: An excellent argument in favor of keeping the cat door open.
Tell that to Gunther Burpus.
[1] http://www.urbanlegends.com/afu.faq/
[2] The Archive Formerly Known As Cathouse, aka the AFU and Urban
Legends Archive, home of the alt.folklore.urban FAQyour friend and
guide to AFU morays.
Andrew "man's best friend" Warinner
wari...@xnet.com
http://home.xnet.com/~warinner
Urban Legend Zeitgeist: http://www.urbanlegends.com/ulz/
Helge Moulding
> [That cats might get hungry if you die unexpectedly is]
> An excellent argument in favor of keeping the cat door open.
I dunno. I keep away from cat doors because my butt doesn't
look good in blue.
--
Helge "No tulips, either." Moulding
mailto:hmou...@excite.com Just another guy
http://hmoulding.cjb.net/ with a weird name
Nathan Tenny
Robert Warinner <wari...@typhoon.xnet.com> wrote:
> T.* Days-old body in home discovered headless. Was eaten by dog!
>
>The Nathan Hale means there is an article on the entry at TAFKAC[2]:
Meirdreach an oincush! I thought that was an extinct usage years since.
I find I've forgotten the first lines of the verse that ends "Wasn't she
a silly girl/Her little *". Foo.
Steve Smith
>
> This crops up once in a while; have just seen it on another NG
> that says there are "stories in the paper about this all the time".
>
> corpse, because she only likes fresh food. Turns her nose up at
> anything that's been down too long. By the time she figured out there
> was no fresh dinner coming, I might stink too much.
>
>
My wife was the newspaper reporter for one of the stories. Jamestown,
New York area, sometime in the mid 1980s. Basically, the guy was a nut
who kept some gonzo number of cats (50?) in his house trailer. He died,
and by the time he was found, the cats had eaten a good part of him and
were in the process of eating each other.
I'd ask her about it, but she tends to retch whenever the subject comes
up (so to speak). The smell was ... impressive. This was *not* one of
the high points of her journalistic career.
--
Steve Smith s...@aginc.net
Agincourt Computing http://www.aginc.net
"Truth is stranger than fiction because fiction has to make sense."
Ulo Melton
> This crops up once in a while; have just seen it on another NG
>that says there are "stories in the paper about this all the time".
Cat, you say? I'll go you one better:
Forensic Sci Int 1995 Mar 31;72(2):81-90
Postmortem injuries inflicted by domestic golden hamster: morphological
aspects and evidence by DNA typing.
Ropohl D, Scheithauer R, Pollak S
Institute of Legal Medicine, Faculty of Medicine, University of Freiburg,
Breisgau, Germany.
A case of postmortem animal scavenging by a domestic golden hamster
(Mesocricetus auratus) is presented. A 43-year-old woman, who was not
under medical treatment, was found dead in her flat with the lower part
of her body naked and her legs straddled. Her face showed extensive
lesions of the soft tissues which the medical examiner interpreted as
vital scalping injuries. The total findings at the scene suggested at
first a sexual offence. On autopsy the face injuries were identified as
postmortem defects by animal scavenging with the teeth marks typical of
rodents. In fact, the decreased had kept in her flat a free-range golden
hamster whose burrow contained numerous fingernail-sized pieces of skin,
fatty and muscular tissue. By means of DNA typing it was proved that
these pieces of tissue belonged to the deceased.
And this one at least mentions cats, even though a dog gets the starring
role:
Forensic Sci Int 1997 Sep 19;89(1-2):57-64
On the temporal onset of postmortem animal scavenging. "Motivation" of
the animal.
Rothschild MA, Schneider V
Department of Legal Medicine, Freie Universitat Berlin, Germany.
During an initial investigation, postmortem scavenging by pets (dogs,
cats, etc.), which sometimes occurs, may sometimes lead to the suspicion
that a crime has been committed. In most cases however, the death was due
to natural causes. The time of the onset of postmortem scavenging by
animals can often not be exactly determined because the interval between
the time of death and discovery of the body is usually considerable. In
this paper we deal with the case of a 31-year-old man, who committed
suicide by shooting himself in the mouth and whose face exhibited
extensive postmortem animal bite marks caused by the victim's Alsatian,
which must have occurred during the 45 minute period between the fatal
shot and the discovery of the body. Hunger, frequently discussed as a
reason for postmortem animal mutilating injuries, could not have been
responsible for the injuries in this case. In the room where the victim
was found, there was also a bowl with sufficient dog food and while being
transported to an animal sanctuary in a police van the dog vomited about
400 g of dog food as well as human tissue.
> I've never seen one, and I don't think my cat would eat my
>corpse, because she only likes fresh food. Turns her nose up at
>anything that's been down too long. By the time she figured out there
>was no fresh dinner coming, I might stink too much.
> I assume the UL means if the cat can't get out to forage.
> An excellent argument in favor of keeping the cat door open.
And letting those badass hamsters get in? I don't think so.
--
Ulo Melton (melt...@sewergator.com)
http://www.sewergator.com - Your Pipeline to Adventure
Deborah Stevenson
On Fri, 30 Jun 2000, Ulo Melton wrote:
> Forensic Sci Int 1995 Mar 31;72(2):81-90
>
> Postmortem injuries inflicted by domestic golden hamster: morphological
> aspects and evidence by DNA typing.
[snip]
> A 43-year-old woman, who was not
> under medical treatment, was found dead in her flat with the lower part
> of her body naked and her legs straddled. Her face showed extensive
> lesions of the soft tissues which the medical examiner interpreted as
> vital scalping injuries. The total findings at the scene suggested at
> first a sexual offence. On autopsy the face injuries were identified as
> postmortem defects by animal scavenging with the teeth marks typical of
> rodents. In fact, the decreased had kept in her flat a free-range golden
> hamster whose burrow contained numerous fingernail-sized pieces of skin,
> fatty and muscular tissue. By means of DNA typing it was proved that
> these pieces of tissue belonged to the deceased.
Oh, my God. It's The Revenge of Raggot.
Deborah "hamster, gerbil, who cares when it's up there" Stevenson
(stev...@alexia.lis.uiuc.edu)
David and/or Jackie Laderoute
Tenny) wrote:
>In article <3q3qlskr0feh8g1hb...@4ax.com>,
>Polar <sme...@mindspring.com> wrote:
>>
>> This crops up once in a while; have just seen it on another NG
>>that says there are "stories in the paper about this all the time".
>
>We had a fairly credible news account a few months ago, about a guy who
>died in his house, alone except for the cats, and wasn't found (by humans)
>for a Reeeeal Looonnnnnggg Tiiiiime. I can't for the life of me find the
>thread at (ugh) deja.com, though---it looks as though they decided that
>no one *really* wants a Usenet archive that goes back more than a few
>months.
That might be me, and I can't find the posts with the details now
either. Our local (Thunder Bay, Ontario) newspaper ran extensive
coverage of the case, but (naturally enough if you knew what a pathetic
rag it is) contain nothing in their archives about it. From memory: In
January, 1999 the skeletized remains of a man who had not been seen for
four years were discovered inside his home, along with the skeletons of
his dozen cats and mounds of garbage.
The guy's name was Toivo Sistonen, he had owned a garage/coffee
shop/convenience store located where Highway 17 and 102 meet outside
Thunder Bay, known locally as Sistonen's Corner - he was worth millions,
although he had lived like a hermit for years. The body was discovered
when the man's nephew, who had not been able to contact his uncle,
finally called police. Sistonen's common-law wife, Jeanette Garrow, had
moved down the road to board at a hotel, but had been tending the yard
and collecting mail - and cashing his cheques into their joint account.
An extensive autopsy was done, but the body had decomposed to the point
where the best the coroner could do was say that he had not died from
anything that would have left obvious trauma to the skeleton. The bones
did show signs of having been gnawed, possibly by the cats, possibly by
the many rats who also frequented the place.
Garrow has since been charged with fraud and improper disposal of human
remains.
Jackie "bare bones" Laderoute
Victoria Simmons
And Dorothy Parker's pet dogs are said to have dined on her remains.
Larry Arnold
of cats this is bound to happen sooner or later.
By and large though cats are not carrion eaters, they would have to be
fairly desperate to eat there owner.
Would the story be any more revolting if it were the other way round and
some elderley person found themselves locked in a house with nothing to eat
but the pet cats?
Larry
--
L'autisme c'est moi
Bo Bradham <bra...@panix.com> wrote in message
news:8jjbv1$nh5$1...@panix2.panix.com...
> Polar <sme...@mindspring.com> wrote:
> >
> > This crops up once in a while; have just seen it on another NG
> >that says there are "stories in the paper about this all the time".
>
> Then it can't be true!
>
> > I've never seen one, and I don't think my cat would eat my
> >corpse, because she only likes fresh food. Turns her nose up at
> >anything that's been down too long. By the time she figured out there
> >was no fresh dinner coming, I might stink too much.
> >
> > I assume the UL means if the cat can't get out to forage.
>
> Maybe it's not an urban legend but just something that happens now
> and then and never fails to make news when it does:
>
> The Independent (London)
> May 7, 1994, Saturday
> SECTION: HOME NEWS PAGE; Page 8
> HEADLINE: Grim discovery
> BODY:
> A dog trapped in its home with its dead owner survived by eating
> part of his thigh.
>
> Arkansas Democrat-Gazette
> April 18, 1997, Friday
> SECTION: NEW; Pg. 2B
> HEADLINE: 2 dogs that ate dead owner's leg offered to his relatives,
> friends
> Two dogs found Wednesday with their owner's partially eaten body will
> be given a chance for a new home, a Little Rock animal control
> official said.
> Officers removed the dogs from 4118 B St. after finding the body of
> Conway Lively, 62, who appeared to have been dead about a month. His
> left leg had been partially eaten.
> "We don't think they're vicious. They were only starving," Rita
> Cavenaugh, animal control division manager for Little Rock, said
> Friday.
>
> Copyright 2000 Scottish Daily Record & Sunday Mail Ltd.
> Daily Record
> February 24, 2000, Thursday
> SECTION: NEWS; Pg. 30
> HEADLINE: DOG FEEDS ON DEAD OWNER
> A WOMAN'S German shepherd dog survived by eating parts of her body
> after she collapsed and died at home.
>
> Patience, hell etc:
> Birmingham Post
> SECTION: FOREIGN NEWS; Pg. 9
> HEADLINE: LION EATS OWNER
> LECCE, Italy: An Italian man who kept wild animals at his home has
> been found dead, eaten by a lion.
>
>
> The Ottawa Citizen
>
> September 23, 1999, EARLY
>
> SECTION: News; A3
> LENGTH: 131 words
> HEADLINE: Police charge wife of man eaten by cats
> DATELINE: THUNDER BAY, Ont.
> BODY:
> THUNDER BAY, Ont. -- The wife of a man whose skeletal
> remains were
> found devoured by cats years after his death has been charged
> with
> failing to report a death and indignity to a human body.
>
> The Toronto Sun
> February 26, 1999, Friday, Final EDITION
> SECTION: NEWS, Pg. 22
> HEADLINE: MANEATER CATS GET A HOME
> A dozen cats that ate the corpse of their HIV-positive owner have
> found a new home.
>
> The Toronto Sun
> February 11, 1999, Thursday, Final EDITION
> SECTION: NEWS, Pg. 1
> HEADLINE: CATS ATE DEAD MAN RECLUSE DIED IN FILTHY HOME FULL OF FELINE
> PETS
> BYLINE: LAURA BOBAK, TORONTO SUN
>
> Turnabout's fair play:
> Sunday Times
> February 12, 1995, Sunday
> SECTION: Overseas news
> HEADLINE: China's gourmets bring back the cat
> BYLINE: Nick Rufford, Jiangmen, China
> BODY:
> THE term ''catnapping'' has taken on a new meaning in China,
> a revival in eating cat meat has put a high price on the heads of pets
> that are snatched from the street to be served up in restaurants.
> ... ''Business
> couldn't be better,'' said Wu Lianguang, the manager. ''The wealthier
> the Chinese become, the more they are concerned about their health and
> there's nothing better for you than cat.''
>
> Bo
>
>
>
Olivers
>
> Polar wrote:
>
> > This crops up once in a while; have just seen it on another NG
> >that says there are "stories in the paper about this all the time".
>
>
>
> Postmortem injuries inflicted by domestic golden hamster: morphological
> aspects and evidence by DNA typing.
>
>
> Institute of Legal Medicine, Faculty of Medicine, University of Freiburg,
> Breisgau, Germany.
>
> A case of postmortem animal scavenging by a domestic golden hamster
> (Mesocricetus auratus) is presented.
Presentation snipped To avoid doubly offending small animal lovers
everywhere.....
>
> And letting those badass hamsters get in? I don't think so.
>
Sales of gerbils have declined overnight after Ulo's posting (and the
remaining critters have been locked away).....
--
TMOliver - el pelon sinverguenza
"Alle kunst ist umsonst,
wenn ein Engel in das Kundloch prunst."
D.F. Manno
"Mary Provost," about a silent movie star who suffered this ignoble fate.
He has claimed that he based it on a news report. (The Internet Movie
Database doesn't list a Mary Provost, which doesn't prove anything either
way.)
The lyrics follow:
Mary Provost did not look her best
The day the cops bust into her lonely nest
In the cheap hotel up on Hollywood West
July 29
She'd been lyin' there for two or three weeks
The neighbours said they never heard a squeak
For hungry eyes that could not speak
Said even little doggies have got to eat
*She was a winner
That became the doggies dinner
She never meant that much to me
(But now I see) Oh poor Mary
Mary Provost was a movie queen
Mysterious angel of the silent screen
And run like the wind the nation's young men steam
When Mary crossed the silent screen
Oh she came out west from New York
But when the talkies came Mary just couldn't cope
Her public said Mary take a walk
All the way back to New York
*repeat
Those twin balms didn't help her sleep
As her nights grew long and her days grew bleak
It's all downhill once you've passed your peak
Mary got ready for that last big sleep
The cops came in and they looked around
Throwing up everywhere over what they found
The handiwork of Mary's little dachshund
That hungry little dachshund
*repeat
Poor Mary, poor Mary, poor poor Mary
Poor Mary
--
D.F. Manno
domm...@netscape.net
"If we didn't laugh we would all go insane." -- Jimmy Buffett
Dustin K. Anderson
>
<snip animals-eating-owners>
> rodents. In fact, the decreased had kept in her flat a free-range golden
^^^^^^^^^
IHNTA, I just thought this was a hilarious mipsleling.
Dustin "reduced to this" A.
Mitcho
wrote:
>Postmortem injuries inflicted by domestic golden hamster: morphological
>aspects and evidence by DNA typing.
Postmortem, they say? How can they be so sure the evil-tempered
little beast didn't finish her off to begin with? [1]
Mitcho
[1] My, what an odd construction
--
The Urban Redneck o red...@employees.org o San Francisco, USA
http://www.employees.org/~redneck
R H Draney
> Nick Lowe (British New Wave rocker) wrote and recorded a song, titled
> "Mary Provost," about a silent movie star who suffered this ignoble fate.
> He has claimed that he based it on a news report. (The Internet Movie
> Database doesn't list a Mary Provost, which doesn't prove anything either
> way.)
Try "Marie Prevost"...IMDb says cause of death was "extreme malnutrition and
alcoholism"...nothing about her being nibbled by the dog, but one of the
mini-biographies says they found her body after neighbors complained of its
barking...now the question becomes: did you mispled the name or did Nick
Lowe?...r
--
"When life hands you lemons, they say you should make lemonade.
Life keeps handing me onions and *telling* me they're lemons."
D.F. Manno
<dado...@earthlink.net> wrote:
> "D.F. Manno" wrote:
>
> > Nick Lowe (British New Wave rocker) wrote and recorded a song, titled
> > "Mary Provost," about a silent movie star who suffered this ignoble fate.
> > He has claimed that he based it on a news report. (The Internet Movie
> > Database doesn't list a Mary Provost, which doesn't prove anything either
> > way.)
>
> Try "Marie Prevost"...IMDb says cause of death was "extreme malnutrition and
> alcoholism"...nothing about her being nibbled by the dog, but one of the
> mini-biographies says they found her body after neighbors complained of its
> barking...now the question becomes: did you mispled the name or did Nick
> Lowe?...r
I just checked my "Basher: The Best of Nick Lowe" CD. It gives the title
as "Marie Provost."
Jon M
wrote:
>Nick Lowe (British New Wave rocker) wrote and recorded a song, titled
>"Mary Provost," about a silent movie star who suffered this ignoble fate.
>He has claimed that he based it on a news report. (The Internet Movie
>Database doesn't list a Mary Provost, which doesn't prove anything either
>way.)
>
>The lyrics follow:
>
>Mary Provost did not look her best
>The day the cops bust into her lonely nest
>In the cheap hotel up on Hollywood West
>July 29
>She'd been lyin' there for two or three weeks
>The neighbours said they never heard a squeak
>For hungry eyes that could not speak
>Said even little doggies have got to eat
Kenneth Anger dishes the (ahem) dirt on Marie Provost in Hollywood
Babylon[1] : "...another silent star who had "voice" trouble, Marie
Provost. Her romantic looks didn't fit her Bronx honk, and blond
Marie tried to drown her heartbreak in bourbon...Marie dragged on
until 1937 when her half-eaten corpse was discovered in her seedy
apartment on Cahuenga Boulevard. Her dachshund had survived by making
mincemeat of his mistress."
The book also has two pictures of Marie, one in better times, and one
in her bed with what looks like bite marks on her leg.
I'd check to see how Mr. Lowe spelled her name for the song, but my
copy of Pure Pop for Now People[1] has disappeared. If it's not gone,
it's probably stuck in a big lump with most of the other record albums
I have left. They all seem to have been the victims of last years'
broken water line in the kitchen above. My Beatles albums are stuck
to the Carlene Carter album, which is stuck to the Johnny Cash albums,
all in a mildewed, unreadable, incestuous mess.
I have to leave now. My dogs are looking at me accusingly, as if I
forgot to feed them again.
Jon M
[1]Remind me--how do you underline book and album titles, again?
Kerro
by Ted V. Mikels.
Daniel L. Dreibelbis
> Impressively documented in "The Corpse Grinders" (1971). Directed
> by Ted V. Mikels.
>
>
Not to mention "The Night Of A Thousand Cats". Even worse than "The
Corpse Grinders", according to the Medveds: to get the cats to attack,
they had to smear the actors with cat food. Which looks rather silly,
having these actors screaming and writhing while the pussycats politely
lick the cat food off.
Dan "the cat food for cats who like people" Dreibelbis
Richard Casady
>>Postmortem injuries inflicted by domestic golden hamster:
morphological
>>aspects and evidence by DNA typing.
>
>Postmortem, they say? How can they be so sure the evil-tempered
>little beast didn't finish her off to begin with?
>Mitcho
Evil little beasts is not the half of it, and as for gerbils,
it is a shame the well know UL is false, as that kind of
thing is better than they really deserve. Of course if
you have reptiles to feed, they have their place. The
sweet natured, affectionate...
I still miss Phyllis Maude, although she has been gone
for more than thirty five years. R.N. are the only ones of
the rodents worth having as pets, although rabbits [bunnies]
might not be bad if the COS would leave me alone. Meows
at the skillet whenever she sees one through the window.
What with the cancer she no longer is really up to killing
them herself, and as for cooking, forget it. And I never
much cared for them. They taste just like chicken, and that
is no novelty, although I eat a lot of the stuff. Why do so
many promising foods seem to taste 'just like chicken'
I went to a lot of trouble to kill a big cottonmouth, mean
fucker, took a full clip of GI ball, 45, wasteful if you don't
get it free, as one of the benefits of being an assassin
for an ungrateful uncle, and after all the trouble it
tasted just like chicken. I will not even ask if RN tastes
just like chicken, they are too lovable to even consider it.
Good to see you back, Mitcho, I must search the stuff that
came in while I was off killing myself in search of revenge
for the Theabaud in NY, for clues, before I ask where you
have been. I figured you had to switch to an uglier saltmine,
or something. Whatever.
Casady
Mailed and Posted
R.N.: Rattus Norvegicus, Norway Rat
The COS: dirty rotten Cat Of Scum, so referred to.
I normally address her as Reeeh, although it does
not really have a written form, of course, cats cannot
write, although she fixed my password, quite nicely.
Luckily I recently replaced it with something easy
to remember that is basically non guessable. It would
fall to brute force, were it not for the necessity of
dialing each guess, not like a Box fucking with another
box at 56k or better, the dialing slows things way down
hundred tries an hour maybe. Be easier to hack it out
of windows, I think.
and, well, who really cares. I live alone, no kids to
misuse the net or whatever.
Richard Casady
How about a cite consisting of a recommended biography of
her. I am fishing for a recommendation for a good read, more
than doubting your word, although I have never heard that
one. Parker represents a serious gap in my education, I know
of her mostly by second and third hand reputation, as worthwhile.
I am not truely literate in the area of fiction, although I hold
my own in some more technical areas.
Casady
Richard Casady
wrote:
>:-)
Fuck you and your two one smiley posts. Die
a little, why don't you and give me reason to
smile.
Casady
Sphincter
I'll give you a reason to smile BOY!
Now slick down dem britches bitch..Jabba got a whole lot a cornholin
to do..
Richard Casady
wrote:
I don't think so, although it is a handsome offer, and I am
sure there is someone out there who would apprecaite it.
Incidently, this is not a sex group, we go in for other things
bullshit, legends, lies, but not bald propositions. That stuff
is why they invented email, perhaps. In any case...
I prefer making war to making love. The wars started when I
was too young for sex, for one thing, and I never learned
to value love and sex properly. Getting too old to be a top
grade killer, but trigger, and fire control keyboard, fingers keep
the necessary stiffness longer into senility, on average than
some things used for love. Fingers are too stiff to type well
actually. Sent millions of whines on that pathetic situation.
Most seem to feel the getting old is actually better than
dying young, although history is full of those who clearly lived
too long. I have been dead for decades, myself, just refuse to
fall is all. I know now what was behind the looks I got from some
of my coworkers when I was a child. The ones with many Purple
Hearts to go with multiple Distinguished Flying Crosses. How
I must have horrified those guys who had seen far to much
two decades before. I could not look into my own eyes, but
they had to. I hadn't heard the term 'walking dead' but I was
advised not to look people in the eye at certain times.
Casady
Sphincter
Ha HO I see, j00 is just playing wid da Sphinter, nuff respect to ya!
If j00 is da auld dewd n yous cant get de flag up da pole anymo, I
recommend some o dat viagaric powda, me man Dick got some o dat and
couldnt sit on im rass for 2 weeks!
Isaaclan
>>:-)
>
>Fuck you and your two one smiley posts. Die
>a little, why don't you and give me reason to
>smile.
>
>Casady
Admittedly the two smiley posts were against the netiquette of this newsgroup,
this hostility really doesn't solve much. It would be much more effective if
you just directed these wayward souls to the FAQ.
"That's a different story altogether. I had to beat them to death with their
own shoes. Nasty business, really, but sure enough I got the M&Ms, and Ozzie
went on stage and did a great show."
Dean Humphries
>
> rca...@uswest.net (Richard Casady) posted:
>
> >On 1 Jul 2000 12:18:59 GMT, "Larry Arnold" <La...@larry-arnold.com>
> >wrote:
> >
> >
> >Fuck you and your two one smiley posts. Die
> >a little, why don't you and give me reason to
> >smile.
> >
> >Casady
>
>
> Now slick down dem britches bitch..Jabba got a whole lot a cornholin
> to do..
Uh-uh.
Sounds like it's time for the number nine ratchcet!
Ouch!
It hurts to just think about it.
--
>>>> Get Snuhy!
>>>
>>> alt.tv.simpsons.snuh & alt.snuh.
>>
>> news:alt.snuh
>
> news:alt.tv.simpsons.snuh
http://www.geocities.com/buhsnuh
___ ___ ___ ___
/\__\ /\ \ /\ \ /\ \
/:/ _/_ \:\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \
/:/ /\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \
/:/ /::\ \ _____\:\ \ ___ \:\ \ ___ /::\ \
/:/_/:/\:\__\ /::::::::\__\ /\ \ \:\__\ /\ /:/\:\__\
\:\/:/ /:/ / \:\~~\~~\/__/ \:\ \ /:/ / \:\/:/ \/__/
\::/ /:/ / \:\ \ \:\ /:/ / \::/__/
\/_/:/ / \:\ \ \:\/:/ / \:\ \
/:/ / \:\__\ \::/ / \:\__\
\/__/ \/__/ \/__/ \/__/
Cohort #15
M.I. #1138
Dr. Richard Silverł SPAMNEENERS CLUB Member
From: en_mog <en_...@hotmail.com>
Newsgroups: alt.tv.simpsons
Subject: Goodbye :-)
Date: Sat, 29 Apr 2000 08:05:45 -0500
If I have any integrity at all, I must leave. I welcome others
to do so as well if they refuse to be led by a group of
unthinking drones that are stuck in such a mindnumbingly
predictable pattern of
snuh/attack/snuh/attack/penises/attack/snuh/rectum/attack/.
Ready to create a new newsgroup?
Everything you need is here:
http://hamish.mcsnetter.tripod.com/index.html
______
A man licensed to kill gophers
> /\__\ /\ \ /\ \ /\ \
> /:/ _/_ \:\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \
> /:/ /\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \
> /:/ /::\ \ _____\:\ \ ___ \:\ \ ___ /::\ \
> /:/_/:/\:\__\ /::::::::\__\ /\ \ \:\__\ /\ /:/\:\__\
> \:\/:/ /:/ / \:\~~\~~\/__/ \:\ \ /:/ / \:\/:/ \/__/
> \::/ /:/ / \:\ \ \:\ /:/ / \::/__/
> \/_/:/ / \:\ \ \:\/:/ / \:\ \
> /:/ / \:\__\ \::/ / \:\__\
> \/__/ \/__/ \/__/ \/__/
>
If I had a perhaps smaller Eschery thing like this for a sig, would everyone
hate me?
"Such a lot of guns around town, and so few brains." --Humphrey Bogart as
Phillip Marlowe, The Big Sleep (1946)
A man licensed to kill gophers
>On Sat, 01 Jul 2000 00:03:56 -0700, Victoria Simmons
><cel...@ucla.edu> wrote:
>
>>
>>
>>And Dorothy Parker's pet dogs are said to have dined on her
>remains.
>
>How about a cite consisting of a recommended biography of
>her.
Meade's "What Fresh Hell is This?," although I don' think it mentions the
being eaten by dogs thing, although it's certainly possible. She was an old
woman who lived alone, apart from the dogs. On the other hand, she lived in a
hotel, so they might have looked in on her periodically, and based on the
amount of fuss she made over her dogs, they (I'm irresponsibly speculating )
they would've been socialized to a point they would scratch and cry at the door
before eating Mrs. Parker's remains.
> I am fishing for a recommendation for a good read, more
>than doubting your word, although I have never heard that
>one. Parker represents a serious gap in my education, I know
>of her mostly by second and third hand reputation, as worthwhile.
I would suggest, then, her stories and poems and collected reviews, Viking or
Penguin puts out a collection worth owning.
>
>I am not truely literate in the area of fiction,
Well, get to work on that.
Sphincter
>Some guy had this for a sig:
>
>> /\__\ /\ \ /\ \ /\ \
>> /:/ _/_ \:\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \
>> /:/ /\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \
>> /:/ /::\ \ _____\:\ \ ___ \:\ \ ___ /::\ \
>> /:/_/:/\:\__\ /::::::::\__\ /\ \ \:\__\ /\ /:/\:\__\
>> \:\/:/ /:/ / \:\~~\~~\/__/ \:\ \ /:/ / \:\/:/ \/__/
>> \::/ /:/ / \:\ \ \:\ /:/ / \::/__/
>> \/_/:/ / \:\ \ \:\/:/ / \:\ \
>> /:/ / \:\__\ \::/ / \:\__\
>> \/__/ \/__/ \/__/ \/__/
>>
>
>
> If I had a perhaps smaller Eschery thing like this for a sig, would everyone
>hate me?
Only those that need a good cornholin would.
Dean Humphries
>
> mutigho...@aol.comgunga (A man licensed to kill gophers) posted:
>
> >Some guy had this for a sig:
> >
> >> /\__\ /\ \ /\ \ /\ \
> >> /:/ _/_ \:\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \
> >> /:/ /\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \
> >> /:/ /::\ \ _____\:\ \ ___ \:\ \ ___ /::\ \
> >> /:/_/:/\:\__\ /::::::::\__\ /\ \ \:\__\ /\ /:/\:\__\
> >> \:\/:/ /:/ / \:\~~\~~\/__/ \:\ \ /:/ / \:\/:/ \/__/
> >> \::/ /:/ / \:\ \ \:\ /:/ / \::/__/
> >> \/_/:/ / \:\ \ \:\/:/ / \:\ \
> >> /:/ / \:\__\ \::/ / \:\__\
> >> \/__/ \/__/ \/__/ \/__/
> >>
> >
> >
> > If I had a perhaps smaller Eschery thing like this for a sig, would everyone
> >hate me?
But why not go big when you can supersize for only another 25 cents?
>
> Only those that need a good cornholin would.
>
> >"Such a lot of guns around town, and so few brains." --Humphrey Bogart as
> >Phillip Marlowe, The Big Sleep (1946)
--
>>>> Get Snuhy!
>>>
>>> alt.tv.simpsons.snuh & alt.snuh.
>>
>> news:alt.snuh
>
> news:alt.tv.simpsons.snuh
http://www.geocities.com/buhsnuh
___ ___ ___ ___
/\__\ /\ \ /\ \ /\ \
/:/ _/_ \:\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \
/:/ /\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \
/:/ /::\ \ _____\:\ \ ___ \:\ \ ___ /::\ \
/:/_/:/\:\__\ /::::::::\__\ /\ \ \:\__\ /\ /:/\:\__\
\:\/:/ /:/ / \:\~~\~~\/__/ \:\ \ /:/ / \:\/:/ \/__/
\::/ /:/ / \:\ \ \:\ /:/ / \::/__/
\/_/:/ / \:\ \ \:\/:/ / \:\ \
/:/ / \:\__\ \::/ / \:\__\
\/__/ \/__/ \/__/ \/__/
Cohort #15
Sphincter
>Sphincter wrote:
>>
>> mutigho...@aol.comgunga (A man licensed to kill gophers) posted:
>>
>> >Some guy had this for a sig:
>> >
>> >> /\__\ /\ \ /\ \ /\ \
>> >> /:/ _/_ \:\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \
>> >> /:/ /\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \ \:\ \
>> >> /:/ /::\ \ _____\:\ \ ___ \:\ \ ___ /::\ \
>> >> /:/_/:/\:\__\ /::::::::\__\ /\ \ \:\__\ /\ /:/\:\__\
>> >> \:\/:/ /:/ / \:\~~\~~\/__/ \:\ \ /:/ / \:\/:/ \/__/
>> >> \::/ /:/ / \:\ \ \:\ /:/ / \::/__/
>> >> \/_/:/ / \:\ \ \:\/:/ / \:\ \
>> >> /:/ / \:\__\ \::/ / \:\__\
>> >> \/__/ \/__/ \/__/ \/__/
>> >>
>> >
>> >
>> > If I had a perhaps smaller Eschery thing like this for a sig, would everyone
>> >hate me?
>
>
>But why not go big when you can supersize for only another 25 cents?
Oh my! That is a bargain.
Jennifer Mullen
:Now slick down dem britches bitch..Jabba got a whole lot a cornholin
:to do..
Sorry, but the sex with Star Wars toys thread is a few doors down and to
the left.
-J.
--
Jennifer Mullen | When life hands you lemons, make
arat...@home.com | lemonade. When life hands you
| tomatoes, make a bloody Mary.
Phil Edwards
wrote:
>"D.F. Manno" wrote:
>
>> Nick Lowe (British New Wave rocker) wrote and recorded a song, titled
>> "Mary Provost," about a silent movie star who suffered this ignoble fate.
>> He has claimed that he based it on a news report. (The Internet Movie
>> Database doesn't list a Mary Provost, which doesn't prove anything either
>> way.)
>
>Try "Marie Prevost"...IMDb says cause of death was "extreme malnutrition and
>alcoholism"...nothing about her being nibbled by the dog, but one of the
>mini-biographies says they found her body after neighbors complained of its
>barking...now the question becomes: did you mispled the name or did Nick
>Lowe?...r
Nick Lowe's title was "Marie Provost"; see for instance
http://www.audities.com/audities/mag/reviews/i11/nlowe.htm . According
to IMDB she was sometimes credited as Provost.
Phil "not a great deal to see here" Edwards
--
Phil Edwards http://www.users.zetnet.co.uk/amroth/
"Oh great. An 'I-have-older-typing-paper-than-you' thread"
- Phil Gustafson
Phil Edwards
>>
>>>:-)
>>
>>Fuck you and your two one smiley posts. Die
>>a little, why don't you and give me reason to
>>smile.
>>
>>Casady
>
>Admittedly the two smiley posts were against the netiquette of this newsgroup,
>this hostility really doesn't solve much. It would be much more effective if
>you just directed these wayward souls to the FAQ.
>"That's a different story altogether. I had to beat them to death with their
>own shoes. Nasty business, really, but sure enough I got the M&Ms, and Ozzie
>went on stage and did a great show."
Nasty non sequitur problem you've got there. That aside, it'd be still
more effective if Casady (or whoever) directed complaints to the
Malaysian ISP whose facilities are being abused to generate these
forged supersede messages. The point being, what looked to Casady like
Larry Arnold being an asshole was actually someone unknown forging
Larry A's identity, and it wasn't assholery but an attack.
Phil "getting nostalgic for gNat" Edwards
Richard Casady
Well, I had forgotten that post, so I have no grudge against Larry
Arnold to 'un have' and well, Sorry Larry, whoever you are. I
mentioned the smiley poster, not a name, and well, If Larry
Arnold will feel better if I state that I stand corrected, sorry
about that, well here it is. So some asshole is forging posts.
I will try to keep it in mind, and other than a few certain varmints
few in number, I answer posts, not posters. I flamed the smileys
not the name Arnold. How do I tell? I mean I take these things
at face value. I will try to remember that LA has an enemy who
is fucking with his name, and well, I accept the' I didn't do it
defence', when I believe it, and this time I do. I didn't mean to
attack the wrong target. Arnold doesn't do smilies? Well, good for
him, and no sarcasm intended, my word on that.
Casady
Public PC Patron
A man licensed to kill gophers wrote:
>
> rca...@uswest.net (Richard Casady) writes:
>
> >On Sat, 01 Jul 2000 00:03:56 -0700, Victoria Simmons
> ><cel...@ucla.edu> wrote:
> >
> >>
> >>
> >>And Dorothy Parker's pet dogs are said to have dined on her
> >remains.
> >
> >How about a cite consisting of a recommended biography of
> >her.
>
My source was my memory of a biography published during the seventies, I
think, and thus much prior to "What Fresh Hell. . ."--which I haven't
read. At that time, I think it was the only major bio available. It
was an okay book, which dwelled much on Parker's failed love affairs,
suicide attempts, et al., but also managed to spend some small amount of
time discussing her work. I think it quite likely that the author cited
newspaper reports of the day, rather than, say, autopsy reports. I've
read former NYC M.E. Milton Helpern's [sp?] memoirs, and I don't recall
him mentioning her, but he is not as much into discussions of celebrity
deaths as some other coroners.
I was a fanatical fan of Parker's poetry when I was a pre-teen, and all
that dark defiance seemed very romantic. Now I like her "Constant
Reader" reviews the best--they are collected in the Portable Parker.
Victoria
cel...@ucla.edu