Cannibaderm, anyone?
amco...@ulkyvx.louisville.edu
A friend of mine recently returned from Chicago said that she heard that some
enterprising pharmacology students at a midwestern university had made,
entirely for recreational purposes, transdermal slow-release patches for
marijuana (a la Nicoderm). Has anyone else heard about this? Sounds like a UL.
Connor/Castigat ridendo mores
Don Fearn
drumstick of the then new "extra crispy" KFC said, "Like a grease-ball
on a stick." I'm sure KFC would hate something like this to get out,
but is there any truth to it?
--
Pooder - Rochester, MN
------------------------------------------------------------------------
"What do *you* care what other people think?" -- Richard Feynman
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Terry Chan
August 17, 1992
Official Usenet Alt.Folklore.Urban Frequently Posted Legends
"Nothing is more desirable than to be released from an
affliction, but nothing is more frightening than to be
divested from a crutch."
-- James Baldwin
This is alt.folklore.urban -- the newsgroup where nonsense is revered
as an artform, and debunking has been taken to new heights.
The group has broadened out from a place for discussing urban legends
(ULs) to a place for confirming or disproving beliefs and facts of all
kinds, including origin of vernacular ("The whole nine yards", "Bob's
your uncle", "Sniping like a bald giraffe"), common scientific fallacies,
obscure points of history, stories of pranks, more about Trilliums than
you care to know and so on. In other words, it's a great place to get a
reality check on anything that "a friend" told you, or to compare notes
about odd things.
As a result, you will find items which are in the classic urban legend
mold (e.g., food contamination legends), as well as old wives tales, and
other oddball facts, trivia, and stories.
A note to new readers: the weasely :-) symbol is frowned upon in this
group. Any questions, see Phil Gustafson who will gladly rearrange your
diodes for you.
The purpose of summarizing these frequently-seen legends is to provide
a guide to veracity and their experience in this newsgroup. While many
if not most ULs cannot be traced back to any original true incidents,
such a connection may be established for some of the more recent ones.
Also, there are classic ULs which may, coincidentally, have a true
manifestation. As noted in the following paragraph, a true manifestation
does not deprive a UL of its legendary status. However, since many if not
most ULs are false, where possible, I am including a one-liner (or so)
noting a true incident, subject to sufficient evidence of course.
A DIGRESSION ON URBAN LEGENDS AND "FALSEHOOD"
Occasionally, someone will post something to the effect of: "That
actually happened you st*p*d, f*ck*ng, b*st*rds, Jan Harold Brunvand
is all wet, the FAQ list is wrong, the sun rises in the West and it's
not an urban legend." As noted elsewhere in this list and by astute
individuals on the net, an UL does not have to be false. If we take
the example of "The Unsolvable Math Problem" (see below), we find that
mathematician George Dantzig is the probable individual involved. So is
this story no longer an UL? Jan Harold Brunvand addresses this issue
thusly:
"Despite finding its [The Unsolvable Math Problem] apparent
origin, I continue to accept anonymous versions as legendary.
Here's why."
"An oral story is a story, whatever its origin. As long as a
story continues to circulate in different variations, partly
by word of mouth, we may regard it as folklore. But probably
'The Unsolvable Math Problem' legend should no longer be
discussed as strictly 'apocryphal,' since we now seem to have
found its source, and the deviations from the original incident
are easily recognized and are not excessive."
- JHB,_The Choking Doberman_, p. 282
Veracity is interesting but far from the last thing when it comes to the
study of urban legends. Other comments welcomed.
MEANWHILE, BACK TO OUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED PROGRAM . . .
I have also begun to collect references to specific volumes of JHB's to
document various classic ULs. This is a slow and on-going process.
Acronyms for Jan Harold Brunvand's books in the list below are:
TVH - _The Vanishing Hitchhiker_
TMP - _The Mexican Pet_
TCD - _The Choking Doberman_
CBA - _Curses! Broiled Again_
Related newsgroups to consider when posting an article which may be "folklore".
- alt.usage.english [pretty self-explanatory, dontcha think?]
- alt.folklore.computers [guess what this one is about?]
- alt.folklore.science ["Does hot water freeze faster than cold?" Heh]
- alt.folklore.college [Lots of the same old stuff, but why not?]
- sci.skeptic [for those with lots of time on their hands]
- alt.tasteless [frequently more appropriate than not.]
- alt.flame [just a thought else hold that thought]
- alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.d [the others are for *pictures* only.]
- alt.religion.kibology [the mother of all newsgroups]
NOMINATIONS FOR THE OFFICIAL MOTTO OF A.F.U.
"It could have happened, so it must be true."
"Sheesh!"
"Sorry to inject some facts into this newsgroup..."
"It COULD have happened so it MUST have happened"
"Bula Vinaka"
"I read it on USENET so it must be true."
"You st*p*d f*ck*ng b*st*rds..."
"The way I heard it..."
"I read it in the paper..."
"I think it's stupid. We collect all these business cards, and it turns
out nobody wants them."
"Mumpsimus"
"Furrfu!"
"No Facts but..."
"And as for the voracity [sic] of the source, this is my GRANDMOTHER
you're talking about."
"True story as far as anyone knows. No particular reason why it should
be doubted."
"I can't vouch for the veracity of your story. But there's enough stupidity
out there that I'll believe it."
"He might have. That alone is enough to prove..."
OFFICIAL AFU MASCOT
- My pet King snake, Elvis
- Peter's pet dalmatian dog, Pixel
- snopes' pet cat, Snopes
OFFICIAL PETER OF AFU
- Peter van der Linden
OFFICIAL FOOD OF AFU
- Red Velvet Cake
- Poinsettia salad
- Kentucky Fried Chicken [Okay, okay, you get the picture.]
NOMINATIONS FOR THE OFFICIAL SONG OF AFU
- "I heard it through the Grapevine"
Okay, the major categories are:
- The Misappliance of Science
- The 'Plane Truth (What goes up...)
- Does Not Compute
- Twinkie Twitter
- Mysterious Medical Maladies
- Wind Powered Fantasies
- Stupid Academia Tricks
- Stupid People Tricks
- What's in a Word?
- Reefer Madness
- How Firm is Your Foundation?
- Kill Your Television!
- Astonishing Antipodean Antics
- Lewd Food
- Snuff Movies
- Upstanding Legends of the Penis and Scrotum
- Hide the Salami
- Disney Dementia (and other amusement park legends)
- Question Authority!
- Wild Life in the Fast Lane
- Legends About Natatory Capabilities of Large Anthropoid Primates
- Astounding Avian Anomalies
- Doggie Style and Cattie Wumpus
- Other Animal Crackers
- Arthropod Crackers
- Some References and Credits
Key to one liners below:
T = 100% scientific truth
Tb = believed true, but not conclusively proven
F = 100% falsehood
Ft = A classic urban legend with a true occurence or discovered origin.
Fb = believed false, but not conclusively proven
U = unanswered and may be unanswerable
P = Maybe it didn't happen, but it's scientifically possible
(used extremely sparingly, where the opposite is expected,
as it could apply to just about every legend)
There is a new comment, "*", on certain lines in the FAQ. This is
because I am pleased to announce that due to the great generosity of
CatStyle (Jason R. Heimbaugh) and the Grate State of Illinois, there
is now a ftp site for AFU and these items have information available
via anonymous ftp. I will send updated FAQ lists and other documentation
on some of the more common ULs there.
Oh right, the name of the site is deja-vu.aiss.uiuc.edu (128.174.53.10).
The subdirectory is /misc/fun/urban.legends. Current holdings include
stuff on Craig Shergold, a rebutal to the FCC modem tax rumor, pull tabs,
and something about snopes.unusual.facts.and.fiction, etc., etc.
================================================================================
THE MISAPPLIANCE OF SCIENCE
F.*You can make as much ice faster by starting with warmer water.
T.*Boiled water freezes faster than ordinary water at same initial temp.
T.*Hot water evaporates while freezing, producing 75% of ice in 90% of time.
F. A penny falling from height of Empire State building will embed in pavement.
[Yeah, yeah, if you check out Matt Groening's stuff in the _Life in Hell_
strips, you'll find a number of these.]
T. Coriolis force affects fluids if you take incredible pains to isolate it.
F. Bath water drains the other way round in other hemisphere, due to Coriolis.
Fb.Microwaving your panties kills yeast infections (cold spots in oven...)
T. Soldiers break step when marching over bridges (trivially observed).
U. Bridge falls down if soldiers don't break step when marching over.
Fb.Bridge falls down due to resonance if soldiers don't break step marching over
Broughton suspension bridge, England, April 14 1831, fell under soldiers
march, but prob just overloaded, not resonating. M Brader posted Times story!
F. Otherwise sound bridge falls down if soldiers don't break step marching over.
(There have been no documented instances of this)
F. Coloring your CD's rim with (special) marker will enhance sound quality.
Fb.CDs are the size they are because it could hold Beethovan's 9th symphony.
F.*People explode/boil/something in the vacuum of space.
F. Eelskin wallet demagnetizes bank cards (nope, but magnetic clasp might).
T. Venus and perhaps a few other bright stars/planets can be seen in daylight.
F. Daylight sky appears dark enough to see stars from bottom of deep well.
F. Bubbles in bubble wrap contain a cheap, but toxic gas.
U. East German secret police "bug" factory now uses skills to make hearing aids
F. Hot-drying acid-washed jeans "re-activates" the acid (Nope, but might shrink)
F. Ontario Hydro mandated poor installation,so copper fails as often as Aluminum
T. Fluorescent lamp will light up when held near high-voltage line.
T. You sure can raise bloody hell asking about physics/chemistry on AFU.
Tb.Fluorescent light will break down vitamins in clear milk containers.
F. Fluorescent lights leach vitamins from your body
Tb.Leather saddles used to be treated with llama dung to avoid scaring horses
Tb.The spec. for leather saddles got copied for leather jackets...
T. 3M "post-it" notes were invented & marketed as an unofficial project
T.*Subliminal messages in advertising are ineffective, but outlawed anyway.
U. Filamentous phage M13 obtained from lab's letter rejecting the transfer!
T. Long term storage of paper in a PVC envelope is harmful (fumes degrade it).
T. Some combinations of metal tooth fillings can receive radio signals.
F. Printer/copier toner is carcinogenic. [But be careful about breathing it.]
F. The moon is larger near the horizon than up in the sky due to refraction.
T. The above is due to an optical illusion.
T. Indiana House Bill #246 of 1897 would've set pi=3.2, killed in state Senate.
Fb.Some state (e.g., Kansas) once considered a bill setting pi = 3.
F. US and Russia won't destroy their cultures of smallpox for fear of bio- war.
F. Taking baking soda as an antacid is bad 'cause CO2 can rupture your stomach.
F. Leaving car radio on when the ignition switch is off will drain battery.
[Excepting VWs and certain other cars where the radio is not switched thru
the ignition switch.]
U. Hypnosis is a fake! Net says "Yes, no, zzzz". [But does remove warts.]
F. Flowers are bad in hospital rooms because they suck oxygen out of air.
Fb.People only use 10% of their brain capacity (whatever that means).
F. If the entire population of China jumped up at the same time: a) the Earth's
orbit would be disturbed, b) the entire US would be swamped by a tidal wave.
Fb.If all the Chinese screamed at the same time, people in the US could hear it.
U. This message is costing the net hundreds if not thousands of dollars.
T. There was a natural nuclear reaction in Africa long ago [NOT an explosion.]
F. Swimming right after eating will cause cramps and you'll drown.
F. Squeezing out the air from a partially consumed soda bottle will keep soda
from going flat.
F. There are workmen who died building Hoover Dam and were entombed in it.
F. I deleted all references to Kibo from the FAQ list.
F. There is a pillar in India made of metal found nowhere else in the world.
Tb.Tomatoes are not vegetables, they're berries. [Thanks, Scott C.]
Tb.Women workers in old watch factories got poisoning by licking brushes used
for applying radium compound to watch faces.
THE 'PLANE TRUTH (WHAT GOES UP...)
T. 800ft diameter asteroid passed within 500K miles of hitting earth in 1989.
T. Confused pilots occasionally land on tiny strip short of correct airport.
T. F51D plane can flip due to engine torque. (A. Frisbie posted pilot's manual!)
Tb.US Govt fixed plane transponders always report positions (catch drug imports)
T. Airforce/manufacturers tests planes by firing chickens from special cannon.
Tb Cessna planes aren't sold in the US anymore due to threat of liability suits.
T. Beechcraft and Mooney still make & sell planes in the US however...
T. Pilot can discreetly signal a hijack by setting the transponder to "7500"
Tb.Leave flaps down when off the active as a request for armed intervention!!
F. The Great Wall of China can be seen with the naked eye from the moon.
T. Many manmade structures can be seen with the naked eye from Earth orbit.
F. Shuttle crew did secret experiment on how to make love in zero gravity.
Tb.Jet lag is exacerbated by alcohol consumption.
T. Parachute mishap brought down a Cessna (gently) on a novice's parachute.
F. Airlines use a gas to keep passengers mildly sedated and less troublesome.
U. Similar story as to why cabin pressure is lower.
Fb.Both pilots on airliner end up locked out of cockpit in lavatory mixup.
["Death and Danger in the Air" in CBA]
DOES NOT COMPUTE
T. Apple use a Cray to design hardware systems; Cray use an Apple...
T. Prodigy grabs large sectors of the disk, containing data from deleted files.
F. Prodigy slyly reads your disk & nefariously uploads your top secrets to IBM.
F. Stories about Seymour Cray's strange hobbies (annual boat burning etc).
F.*The FCC is proposing a modem tax (Nope, the proposal died in 1987).
T. Bill Gates has $750K Porsche 959 he can't use; no type compliance,no license!
U. New computer system "lost" a Montgomery Ward Calif warehouse for 3 years...
T. "q=q++;" is an undefined statement under ANSI C (same object modified twice).
T. Calling "#" a pound sign as in common US parlance really riles some folks up.
T. "#" is frequently referred to as a "hash" mark outside the US.
Fb.Russian/Chinese mechanical translator translates "out of sight, out of mind"
into "blind and insane". Also "Spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak"
as "the drink is good but the meat is rotten."
TWINKIE TWITTER
T. "animal or vegetable shortening" on ingredients list == LARD
F. Hostess snacks (Twinkies, Cupcakes, etc.) aren't baked! They set,like jello
Fb.Twinkies eat mold... If mold grows on a twinkie, the twinkie digests it...
MYSTERIOUS MEDICAL MALADIES
U. Woman had "tree in the bedina" -- potato used as pessary, sprouted...
U. Woman had "Smiling Mighty Jesus" -- spinal meningitis.
U. Woman had "sick as hell anemia" -- sickle cell anemia
U. Woman named child "Nosmo King" after sign on delivery room door.
F. There is a special ward for "Newky Brown" addicts in Newcastle General
F. Person's hair turns entirely white "overnight" from stress.
T. Some people sneeze when exposed to bright light ("photic sneeze effect").
Tb.Patient died when intravenously given Kaopectate.
U. FDA approval causes cancer.
U. Ed Zotti is Cecil Adams (or is it Cecil Adams is Ed Zotti?).
Tb.Drinking large quantities of deionized/distilled water over a long period
of time can screw you up due to ion imbalances.
F. Hair/nails continue to grow after death.
T. They appear to as the corpse shrinks.
WIND-POWERED FANTASIES
T. Fin-de-siecle Frenchman,Petomane,got rich farting as music hall act. Fartist.
U. Blowback (blowforward?) from ignited fart, singed frat-boy's intestines.
U. Vet cut vent-hole in cow's flank, lit escaping gases, burned down barn...
Fb.A patient's intestine explodes from cauterization during surgery due to gas.
Fb.Ted Frank is not on the FAQ list yet.
STUPID ACADEMIA TRICKS
NOTE: Many university-based ULs are passed continually. Before posting, check
out the references below and in Appendix B of JHB's textbook which has a
survey of academe ULs by Barre Toelken.
T. Prof lists famous unsolved problems;student thought it was homework- solved!
Student was George Dantzig. ["The Unsolvable Math Problem" in CBA.]
Fb.Student cheats on exam, asks "do you know who I am?",jams paper in exam pile!
["Bluebook Legends" in TMP]
Fb.Professor jostled; misses watch; grabs back from jostler; later finds at home
[Variation of "The Jogger's Billfold" in TCD]
F. College roommate commits suicide, gets you an automatic "A" for courses.
["The Suicide Rule" in CBA.]
T. Student gets tuition $ by asking for $0.01 from each person via newspaper.
Fb.Students find rolled-up carpet; take and unroll in dorm room to find a body.
Fb.Student kills self during exam by putting 2 pencils in nose and hitting desk.
T. People's lawn gnomes/elves stolen; owners were sent letter/pics from exotic
locations with the ornament. ["Roaming Gnomes" in CBA]
T. Famous UL researcher misspells the subtitle of a Star Trek film in a book.
F. Two co-eds alone in dorm; one goes to study; other in room; roomie hears
heavy dragging sounds; blocks door; hears scratches; waits til morning;
opens door to find other co-ed with ax in head who was scratching for help.
["The Roommate's Death" in TVH and TMP]
Fb.Students buy a barber pole and drive the town. Stopped continually by police.
F. Girl is alone at home/dorm with dog; sleeps; hears noise and a dripping
sound; is frightened but reaches to dog and feels a lick; goes back to
sleep. In morning, finds dog hanged in shower and note under bed which
says "humans can lick too." ["The Licked Hand" in TCD]
Fb.Prof. gives "announced" quiz to surprised class after putting ad in paper.
Fb.Prof. allows students to "bring in what they can carry for exam"; student
carrys in a grad student" (variation on allowing use of "Feynman").
Fb.Prof. nails exam thief by cutting bottom 0.5" of exam to find longer answer.
Fb.Philosophy prof.'s 1 word exam: "Why?". "A" to student who replies "Why not?"
[Many, many variations].
Fb.Low grading prof. grades same exam in successive semesters; gives higher
grade each time. 4th time around (or so), writes: "Like it more each time".
Fb.Student submits 20 yr old paper for class; prof. gives "A"; says he always
liked it but he only got a "B" when he wrote it. [The above 6 are in
"College Con Artists and How They Operate" in CBA]
T. Prof D. "Art of Computer Programming" Knuth's 1st publication was in MAD mag.
(MAD #33 "The Potrzebie system of weights and measures")
STUPID PEOPLE TRICKS
T.*Craig Shergold, UK cancer kid,sought postcards, overwhelmed with 33 million.
T.*Craig Shergold, UK health plan wouldn't operate;Kluge paid; tumor was benign!
T.*CS GIF courtesy of Phil Kernick available via anonymous ftp.
T. Craig Shergold's 13th birthday was June 24, 1992. From now June 24 is AFUday.
Tb.Craig Shergold lives in an "unsalubrious" section of town.
T. His name has been misspelled several times in various pleas.
T. But he sure as heck doesn't want or need any more cards now.
T. See _The Guiness Book of Records 1992_, p. 207.4 for his listing.
T. See 19 July 1990 _NY Times_ (p. 24), _People_ magazine 10 June 1991, p. 63.
T.*Check the afu anonymous ftp site for sources and references.
T. Cards that are sent to the hospital no longer go to him.
T. A variation of the above now includes a call for business cards.
[Classic American UL in this genre is "Postcards for Little Buddy" in CBA]
Tb.If you are really desperate for some more info, try sending me e-mail.
U. Errol Flynn was invited to "black tie" party; went nude, except for black tie
T. The beggars with "will work for food" signs are just extra sympathy scams.
T. People have been injured by rocking a vending machine, that falls on them.
Fb.Man's house demolished after friend placed ad in paper for a joke.
Fb.US GI captures Iraqi soldier - they knew each other from Chicago.
F. Special chemical for swim pools, turns bright color on contact with urine.
F. "3 Men & a Baby" has a scene with a real ghost in it.
Fb.Wife sprays toilet with flammable bug spray, husband shits, smokes, explodes.
Wife sprays toilet with flammable hair spray, you know the rest.
["Hilarious Accidents" in TMP. Variations in TVH.]
Fb*Aluminum ring pull tabs are collected & exchanged for dialysis machine time.
["Redemption Rumors" in TMP]
T. Fred Ennis is posting from "infamy". Sysop: Drew Lawson
T. The Ronald McDonald House in Rochester, MN is collecting tabs for their
own kids needs as of 3/92. Thanks to Shawn Brawnhart, j...@vnet.ibm.com,
and E. David J. Tearns for following up on this.
F. Chanting "Mary Worth" before a mirror summons dead spirit at slumber parties.
["I Believe in Mary Worth" see TMP]
Tb.You can catch diseases (crabs, lice, herpes, VD, etc) from public toilets.
Fb.Male athlete cheats drug test with wife's pee; test shows he's pregnant.
T. Infirm, elderly, obese alcoholics have set themselves on fire occasionally.
F. People occasionally spontaneously combust and burn to death. Whoompfh!
F. Cabbage patch dolls are possessed by the devil.
F. A woman w/beehive hairdo is so proud of it she doesn't wash her hair; she
dies from bees/spiders in it.
Fb.Couple stays in odoriferous hotel room;informed next day of body in mattress.
F. Someone is crushed to death trying to shrink blue jeans by wearing in tub.
["Product Defect and Liability Legends" in TCD]
F.*Tourists' room is burgled, later finds snaps of "toothbrush up thief's ass".
Perry Pederson (n874...@fozzie.cc.wwu.edu) claims to have seen such pictures
from his mother-in-law's Mexico vacation in June 1992.
F. Two guys come across a kid fishing; kid says fish aren't biting but worms
are; on way back; they discover kid slumped over; worms were water moccasins!
["The Can of Snakes" in TMP]
F.*Eskimos have some megaboss number of words for snow.
Fb.Child's foot/leg is amputated after pumping Reeboks shoes too tight.
F. Dr. C. Drew, a plasma researcher; bleeds to death when hospital turns him
(a black man) away. [Similar story with death of Blues great Bessie Smith.]
T. For some reason, some folks kill snakes by grabbing tail and "snapping" them.
T. "Chicken sexing" is big business. Started by Asian family.
F. Guy trims hedges with lawnmower but trims own extremities; sues; wins big!
["The Lawnmower Accident" in TMP]
T. Check in various legal databases shows no such case appealed.
T."little gator" S. Mudgett is in one of Cecil's books.
F. Folks find casks of wine in cellar of old house. Tap and drank from several
of them. Later, preserved body of original house owner found in cask.
[Body in the cask motif may find some basis in old story of Admiral Nelson
of Battle of Trafalgar. His body was shipped back in wine/rum cask. Upon
arrival in UK, cask was low/empty. "The body in the cask" in TCD.]
F. Boyfriend tells girlfriend they're through and she should pack up and out
while he goes on a long trip. He returns to find her gone and phone off
the hook connected to the "time" recording in Japan/some far away place.
["The Lover's Telephone Revenge" in CBA]
U. Occam once hurt himself badly while shaving.
F. Helicopter fights forest fires by scooping water from lake. Charred body
of scuba diver found in ashes. ["Death and Danger in the Air" in CBA]
F. Ship captains, on their own authority, can perform marriages.
F. Fat person on ship/airline toilet has intestines sucked out due to vacuum.
U. Brian "Allah Mode" Scearce manages the "Hors de Combat" female mudwrestlers.
Fb.Some guy in a foreign country teaches the locals that a certain obscene
handsign (to him) was actually a welcoming gesture. Locals all pose for
pictures while making the gesture.
F. Woman on bus raises a man's hand and asks "Who does it belong to? It was
on my butt." Several red-faced men get off [heh] at next stop.
T. Jan Harold Brunvand's son, Erik, teaches at UU and even read a.f.u. Sheesh!
F. Halloween sadists randomly give poisoned candy to children.
T. A Texas child was poisoned by his father on Halloween in 1974.
[Above two are in "Halloween Sadists" in CBA]
F. Woman frequents tanning salons; develops funny smell; innards cooked!
["Curses! Broiled Again" in _CBA_]
T. A guy goes a-shooting at Saguaro cacti; hits one. It falls and kills him!
["The Plant's Revenge" in _CBA_]
Fb.Someone couldn't call for help because they couldn't dial the "11" in "911".
T. Lots of people comment on the FAQ list without actually reading it.
Tb.People were frequently mistaken for dead and were buried alive.
Tb.Some people think researching the most trivial legal point is great fun.
Tb.Edison's last breath is kept in a jar in Michigan. (Well, sort of).
Tb.Elvis lives near Palo Alto, works for Sun, and speaks w/an English accent.
Fb.Co-ed loses tampon inside prior to blind date; worried; sees school intern;
is acutely embarrassed. Her date shows up; it's the intern who removed it!
Fb.Young man buys condom from pharmacist; in his embarrassment, boasts of his
date. He goes to pick her up, her father the pharmacist answers the door!
["The Blind Date" in TMP]
F. Bride at big wedding begins to thank each person in turn, then thanks groom
for sleeping w/maid-of-honor. Then throws bouquet, etc.
["The Bothered Bride" in TMP]
F. Phil Collins' song "In the Air Tonight" is about a death witnessed by Phil.
T. 1st Levi's had a crotch seam rivet. Dropped due to discomfort from standing
near fires.
F. Several suburban white women visit big city. They nervously enter hotel
elevator which has a black man and a dog. He says "Sit Lady!" and they
all promptly sit on the floor but he was talking to the dog! [The guy
in question has been Lionel Ritchie, Reggie Jackson, and Eddie Murphy.]
F. Couple hires hippie-type babysitter. Later, mother calls and sitter says
everything is fine; she's stuffed the turkey and put it in the oven.
Mom worries since they don't have an turkey; parents rush home and find
that stoned sitter has (or is about to) put baby in the (microwave) oven.
["The Hippie-Babysitter" in TVH.]
U. A plain-Jane coed is invited to a special night out by a BMOC. As she
gets ready, her gas from lunchtime chili gets really bad. Her date arrives
before she can relieve herself, so she decides to relieve herself in car
before he gets in. She gets in, relieves herself, quickly rows down window
and regains composure. When date gets in, he says, "I'd like you to meet
Tom and Mary in the backseat." ["The Fart in the Dark" in TVH.]
Fb.Family visits wilderness park. They see bears and want to get "cute pictures"
of bear w/child so they smear honey on his cheek. Bear eats child's face.
F. Bride's father at wedding goes to pay band, but realizes wallet is missing;
has to take up collection from guests. While they watch a videotape of
wedding later, groom/'s father is caught lifting bride's father's wallet!
WHAT'S IN A WORD?
F.*The etymology of the 4-letter word "f*ck" is an acronym of old.
T. Lord knows, there're lots of variations of initials/names for "Jesus Christ".
F. 'HAL' in the film "2001: A Space Odyssey" was derived from letters for "IBM".
Tb.The expression "86" (to put the kibosh on), originated in 1920s diner slang.
P. This expression originated from Kibo's writing of a shell for Bell Labs.
T. A.J.Balfour appt'd Secretary Ireland by Uncle Bob.Nepotism? Bob's your uncle.
T. JF Kennedy said "Ich bin ein Berliner." Could be either "I am a native of
Berlin" or "I am a jelly doughnut." Berliners knew what he was talking about.
T. Hebrew was considered as official language of the US. [Guess what happened?]
U. German was once within one or two votes of becoming the official US language.
T. Fijian on the AT&T ad says ""Bula vinaka, beachside!" ("hello, thanks").
T. Many languages don't pronounce foreign words/phrases as they really are.
Tb.US Civil War Gen. Hooker is the source for a common term for streetwalkers.
F. Thomas Crapper invented the flush toilet.
T. Thomas Crapper did exist and made improvements to modern flushing mechanisms.
F. The word 'crap' is derived from Thomas Crapper.
F. Otto Titzling invented the brassiere.
F. The words to "Louie, Louie" are dirty. [Thanks to Maiko Covington for lyrics]
F. "Posh" is from "Port Out, Starboard Home" from Colonial English days.
T.*"Hamburgers" and "Frankfurters" are named after cities in Germany.
T.*The expression "In like Flynn" is from Errol Flynn's acquittal on statutory
rape charges.
T.*"Okay" is from Martin 'Old Kinderhook' van Buren and an weird fad.
Tb.Warren Burstein posted some urban legend stuff once or twice.
HOW FIRM IS YOUR FOUNDATION?
F. Building is built backwards. Public criticizes; Architect commits suicide.
Tb.There have been buildings built backwards (e.g., Banff Springs Hotel).
F. Various university libraries sink; books heavier than architect thought!
F. Same as above, but pool not library, weight of water, not books.
Ft.Lots of bldgs (malls, etc.) are sinking into the ground.
[See "Back to the Drawing Board--Some Architectural Legends" in CBA]
T. Some universities, cities are riddled with semi-secret utility tunnels.
T. Clouds and other weather can transpire in the upper parts of high structures.
Fb.RC Church building plans reviewed by Pope/Vatican; response was "we are not
angels"; plans had no loos!
Fb.Bldg collapses due to gas explosion from buried dead elephant under it.
KILL YOUR TELEVISION!
Fb."Newlywed Game" husband televised response that the strangest place they
made love was "That'd be the butt, Bob."
F.*The UK cartoon series "Cpt. Pugwash" had character names w/double entendres.
T. Woman goes into epileptic seizures upon hearing Mary Hart's [ET anchor] voice
Tb.Parents get a video for children. Find it was recorded over old porn tape!
F. Johnny Carson said he'd pet Zsa Zsa's pussy if she'd move her cat.
F. JC said to Jack Nicklaus' wife that her kissing his balls before a golf game
must "make his putter stand up." [or was it Arnold Palmer and his niblick?]
REEFER MADNESS
F.*"Blue star" or cartoon character (esp. Mickey Mouse) tattoos laced with LSD
is sold at schools <Important!> to hook kids into acid.
T.*This UL is frequently spread via poorly typed/copied fliers.
T.*LSD has been sold on blotter paper with cartoon characters.
[See "Blue Star Acid" in CBA also in TCD]
T. Person high on drugs stares at sun -- gets partial blindness.
F. Aspirin and Coca-Cola taken together get you high. (Nope. May cause insomnia)
T. Phil Kernick thinks it does work on him though.
U. More than 4 hits of acid in one month renders you legally insane.
F. Tobacco cos. prepared to market/mfg joints if pot was legalized in '60s/'70s.
T. You can beat any drug test (in a Zen way) by not taking the test.
U. Guy on pot pulled over by police. Asked if he knew his speed. Was 5 mph!
F. LSD accumulates in the brain and spinal column and shows up on x-rays.
ASTONISHING ANTIPODEAN ANTICS
F. Some part of Australia is antipodal to some part of N. America or Europe.
T. Cane toads are now a plague, originally imported to eat cane beetles.
U. Koalas are always stoned/drunk, as they eat alcohol in eucalyptus leaves.
U. Koalas, being filled with eucalyptus oil, "explode" in bushfires.
F. Kangaroos deliver the mail in the outback.
U. "Goanna Oil" dissolves muscle protein. Goannas are large native lizards.
U. Driver fools tourists in Milford tunnel bus, says motorbike is oncoming train
U. Dingos eat babies. Australian courts say YES, NO, YES.
Fb.Aussies put vegemite under eyelids to get high. Yum!
T. Some New Zealanders do not think very highly of Australians.
T. There sure are lots of stories about Vegemite. [Why not Marmite?]
LEWD FOOD
T. There're kosher Chinese restaurants in and around big East Coast cities.
T. Most mass-market beers contain "foaming agents" to make them form a head.
U. Eating lots of chicken fast food causes males to grow breasts (from hormones)
T. Eggs and chicken are horribly contaminated, and should NOT be eaten raw.
T. Unless marked "dairy", fast food shakes aren't milk: mostly carrageen gel.
T. Lead leaches from lead crystal decanters into drinks;this is not good for you
F. Eating carrots may improve night vision, because of large amounts of Vit A.
Tb.Microwaved food is better (other cooking allegedly creates carcinogens)
Tb.Eating celery takes more energy than its digestion yields.
U. Mick Jagger used a Mars bar as a dildo on nubile pop loon Marianne Faithful.
F,T,T,U.Fast food places use unusual ingredients: worm, 'roo meat, seaweed, rat.
["'The Kentucky Fried Rat' and Other Nasties" in TVH]
F. Stranger at restaurant eats your cookies, you grab, later find you took his.
["The Packet of Biscuits" in TCD. Yes, this is the story Douglas Adams
claims really happened to him in _So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish_.
Variation w/Kit Kat bars.]
F.*Cook cheated into buying Mrs Fields' recipe, gets revenge by spreading it.
["The Mrs. Fields Cookie Recipe" in CBA. This UL is probably a descendant
of the "Red Velvet Cake" UL in TVH and a newer manifestation involves
Neiman-Marcus.]
F. Drinking distilled water is bad for you since you don't get "trace minerals"
F. Green M&M's ("Smarties" in UK and Canada) are an aphrodisiac
F. Red M&M's are a carcinogen (Nope, they used red dye #5,not dangerous #2)
[Both M&M legends are in "Green M&Ms" in TMP]
F. Ingesting a tapeworm will help you slim, so people do this regularly
["'Bosom Serpent' Legends" in TCD.]
T. Many CIA (and other gov't) snackbars are staffed by blind people.
F. Grape seeds can get caught in your appendix and give you appendicitis.
T. Steven Bellovin thinks diverticulitis may be source of this UL.
T. British army doses water with bromide (for purification), soldiers say it's..
U. ... to suppress soldiers' libidos. US Army salts their peters with saltpeter.
Fb.Kennedy family made their pile thru a Scotch import monopoly
Tb.Kennedy family made their pile thru smuggling Scotch during prohibition.
F. The red leaves of Poinsettias (aka the Xmas Plant) are deadly poisonous.
["The Poinsettia Myth" in TMP.]
T. Poinsettia sap and leaves are irritants and may harm small children.
T. People have been poisoned by eating food cooked on burning oleander branches.
Tb.Asparagus stinks up pee, but ability to smell it is genetically inherited.
T. Fresh seeds from plants of rose family react to form cyanide in the body.
T. Lots of Asian restaurants have humorous names to English speakers.
F. Mikey (Life cereal) exploded from eating Pop Rocks with soda (You wish!)
["The Death of Little Mikey" in TCD]
F. A popular Mexican beer was made with urine.
T. Some people like to eat the placenta (aka afterbirth) of their children.
F. Shampoos and foreign beauty aids are made from aborted babies.
F. Couple travels to exotic locale with pet dog. Eatery prepares it for them.
["Food and Restaurant Rumors and Legends" & "Unfortunate Pet Legends" in TCD]
F. Ethnic eateries (Chinese/East Indian/Italian) use cat/dog/human meat in place
of beef/pork as expected.
["The Eaten Pets" and "Further Ethnic Stereotype Legends" in TMP]
F. Cantaloupes are infected with salmonella and are thus bad to eat.
F. Someone prepares tuna sandwich. Removes tuna can label to find "Cat Food".
T. A consignment of tuna in Canadian stores was designated unfit for human
consumption and withdrawn, but allowed to be sold as cat food; years
later someone tried to sell some of this same consignment as tuna to
humans in the US.
Fb.In pre-revolutionary Paris, peasants resold food from restaurant garbage.
T. Vegemite (and Marmite) is made from yeast by-products, salt, and other stuff.
Fb.Cannibalism was a common means of sustenance for past cultures.
F. "Instant" ramen noodles are coated w/wax and can cause intestinal blockage.
Fb.Drinking alcoholic beverages through a straw makes one drunker faster.
Tb.Carbonation in whisky and soda makes one drunk faster than a straight whisky.
F. Marco Polo brought pasta back to Italy from the Chinese.
Tb.Spinach has no more iron than other vegetables; UL due to misplaced decimal.
F.*People eat chocolate because it gives them the same feeling as being in love.
F. Chocolate makes people horny.
F. Peeling labels off a beer bottle means you're: a) virgin, b) gonna get
lucky, c) sexually frustrated.
F. Eating hot bread is bad for you (alcohol, stomach upset, etc.)
Tb.Don't use fresh/frozen pineapple, Kiwi fruit, or maggots to make Jell-O.
SNUFF MOVIES
Tb.The Feds, cops, CIA, etc. have never actually found a real snuff film.
T. Scotland Yard has found no evidence of snuff films in the last 20 years.
F. "Snuff films" actually exist (Nope, tho' there are various wannabe fakes)
T. Some psychotics have taped the murder of their victims.
T. Search in WestLaw in 1991 showed no mention of cases on "snuff films".
F. "Faces of Death" is a snuff film.
F. "Snuff" was a real snuff film.
T. We never saw a snuff film that we didn't like.
By definition, a snuff film is one in which the film is the *purpose* of
(rather than incidental to) the murder and with some intent of commercial
distributio and with some intent of commercial distribution (i.e. if they
ran out of film, the murder would be postponed until someone could run down
to the 7-11 & get more). Paul Lanning, the FBI's chief researcher into child
pornography was quoted by "The Times" of London:
"In 20 years I have not seen any hard evidence that they have
commercially produced sexually explicit films of murders for the
gratification of other people. Simulated snuff movies using
special effects are so realistic there is no point in risking life
in jail."
Note to the new reader: please don't send or post e-mail saying "snuff movies
*could* exist, because people are naughty enough" - this is not in dispute;
the point is that no examples have yet come to light. Until someone shows
evidence of their existence, snuff films are in the same category as UFO's,
the Loch Ness monster, and Bruce Willis's hair -- i.e. "believed false."
UPSTANDING LEGENDS OF THE PENIS AND SCROTUM
F. Model's dick showed in a Sears catalog ad for shorts (it was drawstring!)
T. But it looked a little like the model's wiener, and folks thought it was.
T. Nelson Rockefeller died of cardiac arrest while porking the help.
U. Errol Flynn banged out "Star-spangled Banner" on xylophone with his big dong
F. Gangster John Dillinger's long wang is pickled in a jar at/near Smithsonian.
F. In Nigeria, roving gangs of thieves may surreptitiously steal mens' dorks.
T. Groupies took plaster casts of pop singers' schlongs, inc Hendrix's whacker.
Tb.Adolf Hitler only had one testicle. Immortalized in many a kid's rhyme.
T. Masturbator's penis in hose chopped by fan blade of Hoover Dustette cleaner.
T. This is dubbed the legend of "the Cleaner and the Leaner Wiener".
U. Woman slits guy's scrotum, sticks straw in, and blows; he gets off on it...
F. Child in mall goes to toilet; is abducted; has willie cut off. [TCD]
F. Drunk joyriding on hood of car, loses parts to hood ornament at sudden stop.
F. Wife seduces cheating husband then superglues his plonker while he sleeps.
T. Guy hurts self after sex w/machine drive belt, has self surgery w/stapler.
Fb.Health worker in US/Africa demos condom usage to immigrants/natives w/a
broom/finger. Woman returns preganant had used EXACTLY as taught.
HIDE THE SALAMI
U. Cuckolded husband replaces contents of wife's pessaries with lye.
T. Mad doctor in Ohio cut off womens' clitoral hoods while operating on them.
T. People put assorted objects up their asses, get stuck, removed in hospital.
U. Well-known film star et al. put a gerbil up his ass for "wriggly furry fun"
["The Colo-Rectal Mouse" in TMP]
T. Gerbils are illegal in California. [CA Regs. Title 14, Sec. 260 (b)(10)(A)].
U. Well-known male pop star rushed from concert, stomach pumped free of semen.
F. Spanish fly (Cantharides) is aphrodisiac (actually genital tract irritant).
F. Girl slipped spanish fly at drive-in movie; found impaled on gear shift.
F. Woman tied naked to bed, man in superhero costume with broken leg in closet.
Fb.Hetero couple get stuck together while coupling. Separated at hospital.
F. One night stand, partner leaves early, other partner finds msg "Welcome to
the world of AIDS". ["AIDS Mary" in CBA]
F. Student is regularly nocturnally chloroformed by roommate, for sodomy.
Tb.This may have actually happened in the Dutch army. Those officers!
F. `Baghdad Betty' told US army that Bart Simpson was sleeping with their wives.
Tb.Would-be rapist steals kisses; one Calif victim bit a piece off his tongue.
F. Man fills wife's lover's convertible with concrete.
["The Solid Cement Cadillac" in TVH]
T. Woman's womb filled with air during cunnilingus; she dies due to embolism.
F. Woman impregnated while swimming, due to sperm loose in pool.
F. Woman impregnated when hit by bullet that shot Civil War soldier's testicles.
Tb.Unintentional virgin birth happens occasionally in bizarre circumstances.
Tb.E.g. vagina-less woman, fellates lover, stabbed in gut by boyfriend,pregnant!
F. Silicone breasts expand under low pressure (e.g. airline stewardesses on job)
U. Mother threatens to discipline kid;kid threatens to squeal on mom's fellatio.
F. Husband informed that septic tank/toilet blockage due to too many condoms;
but he doesn't use them; confronts wife, she confesses affair w/milkman.
He waits and shoots milkman next day; but it was a substitute milkman!
["The Evidence" in TMP]
F. Couple goes to "love" hotel w/hot tub, mirrors, etc. Make the sign of the
six legged aardvark. Upon return, call up an X-movie and see themselves!
F. There was a significant increase in NYC births ~9 months after 1965 Blackout.
DISNEY DEMENTIA [AND OTHER AMUSEMENT PARK STORIES]
T. Disney parks are riddled with secret tunnels and surveillance equipment.
T. "Little Mermaid" video cover features good drawing of penis. Prank? Revenge?
T. There is a basketball hoop at the top of the Matterhorn replica.
T. Male Disneyites may not grow beards (& many other petty rules for women too)
T. There is a secret "Club 33" serving hard liquor,in New Orleans Sq,Disneyland.
T. Clerics in their robes are admitted to Disneyland at concessionary rates.
T. Wheelchairs & 1 attendant go to the front of the line for rides.
Tb.Disney ripped off Orlando county, thru grabbing Federal road funds
T. Woman alleges clit-tickling by one third of 3 Little Pigs; case thrown out
F. Three little pigs clit-tickled law-suit happy babe, with non-mobile arms.
F. Child disappears from Disneyland, found with new haircut, dyed by abductor.
T. SF writer Harlan Ellison fired from Dismall Studios after Mickey porn joke.
F. Old Walt Disney's dead body was frozen for later revivification.
F. Child goes for ride on popular ride; feels bites; dies from snake bites!
F. Water in "Tunnel of Love" ride infested with snakes. [Both in "Death in
the Funhouse" in _CBA_. Stephanie da Silva says this really happened to her.]
T. AFU WEST ][ was on December 12, 1991.
T. There was an AFU South in May, 1992 with 2 people (Dick Joltes being one).
Tb.snopes was in Los Altos, California on January 28, 1992.
QUESTION AUTHORITY (and other conspiracies)
U. CIA fixed the Anarchist's Cookbook, so explosive blows up as you make it.
T. You may *own* the mailbox, but the US Postal Service controls what goes in it
T. The CIA, NSA and 11 different secret govt organizations tap & bug everything
T. Princess Anne was only female competitor not given sex test in 1976 Olympics.
T. London doctor struck off for inveigling Turkish peasants to donate a kidney.
F. Guy/gal wakes up in Big City, a kidney has been stolen from him!
Tb.Hubbard started Scientology after Heinlein bet he couldn't found a religion.
T. P&G's logo does NOT reflect Satanic or Moonie ties.
["The Proctor & Gamble Trademark" in TCD]
Tb.Candy manufacturers sneakily micro-reduce size of product to gyp you.
F. Universal Product Codes (computer readable bar-codes) are marks of Satan.
P. VP Bush persuaded Iranians to delay hostage release to aid Reagan election.
U. Govt has secret plan to replace the currency overnight to foil drug barons.
Tb.CIA radio transmits spoken five digit code numbers to operatives worldwide
T. You can send a coconut thru the mail without any further wrapping. Yowser!
T. Some change-making machines can be fooled by photocopies of currency.
T. The NSA shortened the key length on DES.
U. The NSA shortened the key length on DES so they could crack everyone's codes.
T. The NIST is proposing a less secure digital signature standard than RSA...
U. because the NSA asked them to, so they could crack everyone's codes.
F. Unification Church (i.e. Moonies) owns Entenmann's bakery
F. Unification Church (i.e. Moonies) owns Waldenbooks.
Tb.Unification Church (i.e. Moonies) owns a fish processing plant in Gloucester,
Massachusetts.
U. Those guys selling roses on roads are connected with the Moonies.
T. Entenmann's owned by General Foods, Philip Morris bought, merged w/ Kraft.
F. Govt cabbage price memo lots longer than var. patriotic/religious documents.
["The Price of Cabbage Memo" under "Government Legends" in TCD.]
F. Govt regularly burns WWII-era hemp fields. Only high officials know where.
F. If you are the first to read this and send me e-mail, you will receive $10.
Fb.Class requests satellite imaging photo; US says "no"; (then) USSR says "yes".
F. Compensation paid to kin of Salem witches up to 1957 (per _The Economist_).
T. Mass. recanted the Salem trials and freed the witches within a few years
T. Name of last alleged witch was cleared in 1957.
Tb.Whole business is extraordinarily similar to modern accusations of Satanism.
T. Crop circles (at least in the UK) have been shown to be man-made.
T.*Mapmakers place copyright traps in maps (Rand-McNally, no. Thomas Maps, yes)
U. Several noted movies have "death curses" on them.
Fb.Major firms/gov't suppress evidence of a super great product (car,light,etc.)
T. The USA did indeed have a 49 star flag.
U. If God sued Satan, it would make the FAQ List.
T. Channel 1 for TV existed in the US, but was eliminated by the FCC in 1945.
U. Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone.
F. An undercover cop must answer yes to "Are you a cop?" to avoid entrapment.
Fb.Guy dodges draft by eating peanut butter/hotdog from rectum in front of MD.
F. There was once a female Pope in the Roman Catholic Church.
F. Noted atheist Madalyn Murray O'Hair/O'Hare is petitioning the FCC to ban
religious broadcasting.
Fb.U.S. Patent Office head once recommended that it be closed because
"Everything that can be invented has been invented."
F. It's illegal to pick Trilliums in Ontario, Canada.
WILD LIFE IN THE FAST LANE
Fb.Schoolkid beheaded by road sign, due to sticking his head out the bus window.
Tb.Oregon Highway Div blows up eight ton dead whale, showers town with blubber.
Fb.Gas (petrol) engines pollute the same as diesel; diesel just smells worse.
Tb.Diesel engines emit more unburnt hydrocarbons than gas ones w/catalytic conv.
Fb.Power windows in cars trap kids' limbs, necks. Kill or maim them.
T. A 2 yr-old girl was killed by a power window in a Fiat in the UK in May 1992.
F. Stop signs with a white border are optional. (Oh, I don't think so...)
Tb.Airbag in car can give you a chemical burn when it deploys.
U. Driver sets cruise control, wrongly believes it steers too! Crashes...
["'Cruise Control' Stories" in TCD.]
Tb.Tree-lined French avenue triggers epileptic fits by flickering light at 11Hz.
F. The VW Beetle was designed by Hitler.
Fb.New car rattles -- note found in door frame from factory saboteur...
["The Rattle in the Cadillac" in TCD.Classic UL always involves a luxury car]
T. Montana & Wyoming have a token $5 fine for exceeding Federal 55mph limit.
T. Mongo-power engine installed in weenie-looking car. Blows off Corvettes.
T. John Somebody-or-other built car called "the Beast" with 27lt Spitfire engine
T. It eventually took off, and self-destructed on the A27 outside Brighton.
T. Special equipment can transmit any reading you want to police radar gun.
T. There are traffic lights with green on top in a few US Irish neighborhoods.
T. You can be guilty of DUI on a bicycle, horse, perambulator, etc most places.
T. Guy in Los Alamos labs fitted a jet engine to Honda Civic, ran on salt flats.
U. Person fitted rocket/JATO unit to car, embedded in rockface at first bend.
Fb.Man working on roof ropes himself to car on other side;wife drives off.Splat.
T. The "man on roof" appeared on a home video show in UK. Believed to be staged.
F. Hitchhiker disappears, is ghost of person killed years ago in road accident.
["The Vanishing Hitchhiker" in TVH and TMP]
F. Valuable classic car sold for pittance by (1) grieving parents of war dead
F,U(2) spouse of errant husband (3) heirs of person who died and rotted in it.
Fb.(4) sold by widow who would receive either car or proceeds of its sale.
["The Death Car" and "The Philanderer's Porsche" in TVH. "The Bargain
Sports Car" in CBA]
F. Psycho's handhook hanging from the car door, broken off as couple drove away
["The Hook" in TVH]
F. Carthief squashed dead in stolen BMW by collapsing freeway in '89 SF quake
F. Driving barefoot is illegal most places (Nope, but it's dumb to goad cops)
T. Driving barefoot is illegal in the state of Kentucky.
T. New York car thief stole lab delivery of cadaver heads...
U. Red sports cars generate disproportionate number of speeding tickets.
F. Man crashes into tollbooth while receiving fellatio from girlfriend.
Fb.Flashing your headlights will cause a traffic light to change faster.
Tb.There're lots folk remedies to plug up old radiators: cigarettes, pepper.
T. Lots of places have weird street names.
T. You can find lots of weird msgs on license plates if you try really hard.
T. "SIGAlerts" in the greater LA area are named for a guy named Loyd Sigmon.
F. Couple's car out of gas; he gets help; she hears noise, then cops arrive;
tell her to leave & not look back; she does, sees him hanging or decapitated.
["The Boyfriend's Death" in TVH]
F. Guy trys to siphon gas from an RV but instead siphons from the septic tank;
found unconscious by RV next morning.
Tb."Maintenance-Free" batteries were invented for cheaper transport of new cars.
F. Police officer pulls over female driver. To her query on tickets to a
policemen's ball, he replies "Policemen don't have balls."
Fb.Woman gets in her car at night; is followed all the way home; calls for help;
husband comes and accosts the guy; guy was actually trying to warn woman of
thug in backseat. ["The Killer in the Back Seat", TVH]
Fb.Parking spot taken from older woman by two younger women. They tell her
"Sorry we're younger and faster." Woman reflects, rams their car, and
replies "I'm older and richer". [Several variations on the repartee.]
["Old vs. Young" in TMP and also used in the film "Fried Green Tomatos".]
F. A motorcyclist at high speed hits a fly which goes to his brain via his eye.
F. An auto worker steals parts of a Caddy bit by bit until he has a whole car.
U. Fancy car owner puts "No Radio" sign in car. Returns to broken windshield
and "No Windshield" or "Get One" sign.
Fb.Truck gets stuck at low bridge. No one can figure out what to do until a
young kid suggests letting the air out of the tires.
U. People drive on the left in the UK (etc) to allow easy sword access in
old days.
LEGENDS ABOUT NATATORY CAPABILITIES OF LARGE ANTHROPOID PRIMATES
Tb.Gorillas can't swim.
T. Certain tribes of Japanese macaques sift their grain in the sea.
Fb.Many simians hold regular swimming contests; winners mate w/ choice females.
Tb....Losers go on "The Love Connection".
P. Chimpanzee muscles are formed in a way that renders backstroke impossible.
T. Some monkeys prefer not to swim at all; will drown if dropped in water.
T. Ted Frank hoped to be mentioned in the FAQ list.
ASTOUNDING AVIAN ANOMALIES
F. Birds cannot sing while on the ground.
Tb.Govt forces commercial birdseed to be irradiated to stop hemp seed sprouting.
T. Radar emissions can kill birds, sterilize sailors, fry other small mammals.
T. Chickens are easily mesmerized. Whoopee.
F. Sprinkle salt on a bird's tail to catch it by preventing it flying away.
T. If the bird let you get close enough to salt its tail, you could grab it.
F. Seagulls (and other creatures) explode when you feed them Alka-Seltzer or
rice, or "pop-rocks" - dried coconuts?. ["The Death of Little Mikey" in TCD].
F. Birds won't sit on their nests if you touch one of their eggs.
DOGGIE-STYLE and CATTY-WUMPUSS [See also LEWD FOOD]
F. Dalmatians and humans are the only mammals whose urine contain urea.
Tb. Dalmatians and humans are the only mammals who cannot break down
uric acid into its soluble form "allantoin"
U. Old/ditzy woman puts dog in microwave to dry it out- it dies gruesome
death/lives to bark again. ["The Pet (or Baby) in the Oven" and "Hot Dog"
in TVH. Also "I Read It in the Paper" in TCD.]
T. A Baltimore lawyer was busted for microwaving a kitten in January 1992.
Fb.Trapper ties dynamite to coyote, releases; coyote runs under his car/house.
["The Coyote's Revenge" in TCD. Similar ULs with rabbits, raccoons, fish,
etc. exist and are traced back to an old motif involving a cat in TMP]
F. Woman found a rat in Mexico and brought it home thinking it was a dog.
["The Mexican Pet" in, surprise! TMP]
F. A Doberman chokes on fingers that it bit off burglar hidden in closet.
["The Choking Doberman" in, surprise again! TCD and TMP]
F. Plastic/glass water bottles on lawn prevent dogs urinating in the area.
["Lawn Order in New Zealand (and elsewhere) in CBA]
F. Dead rabbit next door dug up by dog; washed, put in cage by frantic dogowner.
["The Hare Drier" in CBA.]
F. The scent of wolf dung terrifies dogs, so disposal by zoos is regulated.
F. Fox frees itself of fleas by gradual immersion, shifting fleas to lintball.
T. Radioactive cat litter found in May 1991 in Berkeley, Calif
U. Source of the litter was radioactive cat food? Cat on radiation therapy?
F. Killer whales will attack swimming dogs because they stink like hell.
F. Dead body discovered headless. Corpse eaten by dog!
T. Cats can carry a parasite (toxoplasmosis) which is esp. dangerous to fetuses.
Tb.Aspirin is very bad for cats (slow removal of salicyates from their bodies).
Tb.Dog gets shock from phone line, urinates, phone rings!
F. Woman's cat dies. She puts it in a shopping bag/box to take it to the
country for burial. On the way, she stops at a store and puts the bag
down. She turns around and bag is shoplifted. ["The Dead Cat in the
Package" in TVH. There's an amusing ending in one of the stories.]
OTHER ANIMAL (BUT NON-BUGGY) CRACKERS
U. Every animal has enough brains in its head to preserve its own hide.
Fb.Driver runs over exotic animal,wraps in coat for fun photo;it revives, runs
off! Similar story: A hunter poses for picture w/deer w/rifle in antlers.
Fb.Farmer asks hunter to shoot mule; other hunter shoots another mule too.
T. Armadillos can contract leprosy.
U. Armadillos can spread leprosy to humans.
Tb.Cow-tipping (pushing over a sleeping cow) has happened.
Tb.Cow-tipping is usually just a bunch of hooey to beguile city kids.
Tb.Candiru fish, native to S. America, can swim into your urethra.
T. Fainting goats are real. Crimony!
T. Galapagos turtles do moan and groan during copulation.
F. Guinea pigs' eyes fall out if you hold them up by their tails.
T. Guinea pigs actually *do* have small stumpy vestigial tails. Take a look!
F. Cyndi Cuppernell bungee jumps guinea pigs with the cord attached to its tail.
Fb.Horse falls thru bottom of moving trailer, legs ground to stumps.
Fb.Otter, newly-released after $50K Valdez clean-up, is eaten by whale.
T. Rats cannot vomit (the basis for many rat poisons).
F.*There are [albino] alligators inhabiting the sewers of New York City. [TVH]
T. There sure seem to be lots of stories about pigeons.
T. Sewer rats can come into the house and bite one's behind while on the potty.
Tb.Gerbils are trained to sniff drugs in Canada. Those Canadians!
U. Litter from released balloons choke and kill whales, birds, etc.
F. [Domestic] turkeys are so dumb, they'll drown if they're out in the rain.
ARTHROPOD CRACKERS
T. Really big insects (snakes too) can get imported along with fruit shipments.
F. Bugs congregate in the pointy ends of bananas, so discard before eating.
F. Dragonflies ("darning needles") can sting you very severely.
T. Only hymenopterans sting. A large dragonfly may be strong enough to pinch.
F. If a dragonfly or a ladybug lands on you, you will have good luck.
T. "Killer" African bees are swarming into Texas from down South.
T. A lot of people have found live or dead insects in their fast food snacks.
T. Cockroaches love coffee, live in TV's, too often get in your cup or food.
T. Insect lays eggs in open wound; months later baby insects eat their way out.
F. Cactus shakes, then explodes with hundreds of scorpions/spiders.
["Spiders in the Yucca" in TMP]
F. Explorer gets bug in ear; bug eats thru to other ear; gave birth on way...
[Various ULs of this type under "A Bug in the Ear" in _CBA_]
Fb.Lobsters, dropped in boiling water, scream.(Nah, it's steam from under shell)
Fb.Moth/butterfly scales from wings will poison or blind you.
Fb.There are US state laws making it illegal to kill/capture praying mantises.
T. The bite of the Brown Recluse spider is nasty.
SOME REFERENCES:
Cecil Adams (_The Straight Dope_, 1984, ISBN 0-345-33315-2 and_More of the
Straight Dope_, 1988, ISBN 0-345-35145-2 both published by Ballantine
Books). Author of "The Straight Dope" Q&A column of _The Chicago
Reader_ and is syndicated in many alternative newspapers. Cecil is "a
National Treasure" who "tells people what they actually want and need
to know instead of useless rubbish." Worth reading if only for for his
writing style.
Jan Harold Brunvand (_The Vanishing Hitchhiker_, 1981, ISBN 0-393-95169-3;
_The Choking Doberman_, 1984, ISBN 0-393-30321-7; _The Mexican Pet_, 1986,
ISBN 0-393-30542-2; _Curses! Broiled Again_, 1989, ISBN 0-393-30711-5,
_The Study of American Folklore_, 3rd Ed., 1978, all published by W.W.
Norton) is one of the leading folklorists today and has done much to
popularize the study of ULs. Also has a great back hand.
Alfie Kohn, _You Know What They Say...The Truth About Popular Beliefs_,
1990, ISBN 0-06-092115-3, Harper. Pretty good book with, get this,
*references* to stuff in the back.
G. & C. Merriam Co., _Webster's New Collegiate Dictionary_, 1977, ISBN
0-87779-348-4. Great bedside reading. Check it out sometime.
William Poundstone (_Big Secrets_, 1983, Morrow and _Bigger Secrets_, 1986,
Houghton-Mifflin). Sorry, it's a secret. [I understand from Graham Toal
that these books may be ordered from Blackwells in Oxford (via phone).]
Peter van der Linden (_The Official Handbook of Practical Jokes_ Signet,
ISBN 0-451-15873-3, 1989 and _The Second Official Handbook of Practical
Jokes_, 1991, Signet, ISBN 0-451-16924-7). Do you want to get the scoop
on practical jokes that actually have some real world validity rather
than those dreamed up by prepubescent college kids on bad banana peels?
Try checking these two bricks^H^H^H^H^H^H books out. You'll find ULs,
delightfully bad illustrations, and even practical jokes. As a bonus,
get the real dope on STella. A free gerbil to anyone who sends in the
cover page from a volume with her STella (offer void in California
under Title 14, Sec. 260 (b) (10) (A)). $3.50 ea. Cheap!
===============================================================================
An urban legend:
* appears mysteriously and spreads spontaneously in varying forms
* contains elements of humor or horror (the horror often "punishes"
someone who flouts society's conventions).
* makes good storytelling.
* does NOT have to be false, although most are. ULs often have a basis
in fact, but it's their life after-the-fact (particularly in reference
to the second and third points) that gives them particular interest.
===============================================================================
Unbounded thanks to: Jane Beckman, Mark Brader, Jack Campin, Raymond Chen,
Cathi A.Cook, Jeff Davis, Scott Deerwester, Larry Doering, all the Terry's:
Carroll, Chan, Monks, Wood, etc., David Esan, Ted Frank, Alan Frisbie, Tom
Greer, Phil Gustafson, Jason R. Heimbaugh, David A. Honigs, Wendy Foran
Howard, Mark Israel, Richard Joltes, Jim Jones, Cindy Kandolf, Phil Kernick,
Susan Mudgett, Bill Nelson, Tom Neff, Christophe Pettus, Brian Scearce, Randal
Schwartz, Ken Shirriff, snopes, Haakon Styri, Dwight Tovey, Peter van der
Linden, and Greg Widdicombe.
OTHERS?
Have you ever wondered how those people have gotten the name at the end
of the FAQ list? Those on the list above are people who are widely recognized
as thoughtful posters of reliable information. They have consistently added
value to various debates by sharing their point of view, and often researching
difficult questions which arise on the net, and posting authoritative facts
citing sources.
The official way for joining the list of distinguished AFU-ers is to
take one of these unanswered questions that come now and then, research
it and reach a definitive conclusion (or demonstrate that one cannot be
found). Post your findings. If the report is sound, and the original
question was non-trivial, you will be added to the acknowledgements section
of the FAQ list! Be prepared to submit references. We are mostly adults
here. Be prepared to discuss and debate your research and conclusions here.
The unofficial way to get on the list is to give me a big payoff.
Original FAQ list by Peter van der Linden, February, 1991.
Maintained by Terry Chan since July, 1991.
Mildly tinkered with in a few trivial ways, PvdL, December 9, 1991
Masterfully improved formating courtesy of Tom Neff, December 16, 1991.
Last updated: August 14, 1992, by Terry Chan.
--
Berkeley, California Internet: TWC...@lbl.gov
"As to the veracity of my source, this is my GRANDMOTHER you're talking about!"
-- Someone on alt.folklore.urban
Mark Eckenwiler
Sure. It's new. It's a patch. Ask your doctor. Dope-O-Mine(tm).
It's a patch. It's new. It's a patch.
ObUL: Dialing 958 at a NYC payphone generates a voice recording of the
payphone's number.
--
Sold by weight, not by volume.
Some settling of contents may have occurred during shipment and handling.
Mark Eckenwiler e...@panix.com ...!cmcl2!panix!eck
Scott Cromar
I know that there is a marijuana extract (called Marinol) which is
used to treat nausea in cancer patients. But from what I understand,
it is not supposed to give you a high, and isn't much good at reducing
nausea either.
--Scott
Bruce Tindall
In article <Aug.17.17.15....@math.rutgers.edu>, cro...@math.rutgers.edu (Scott Cromar) writes:
>I know that there is a marijuana extract (called Marinol) which is
California (which reputedly has a high per-capita consumption of
marijuana).
--
Bruce Tindall, Core Testing Manager, SAS Institute Inc., Cary NC 27513
James D. Jones
>Somewhere (FOAF maybe??) I heard that Harlan Sanders, upon sampling a
>drumstick of the then new "extra crispy" KFC said, "Like a grease-ball
>on a stick." I'm sure KFC would hate something like this to get out,
>but is there any truth to it?
I don't know about the quote, but I do know that he hated the "extra
crispy" recipe. I read this in a newspaper article about him
from years ago, somewhat before his death. I remember him condemning
it in fairly strong terms. He was an old dude, had already made his bucks and
had nothing to lose. He'd sold out his interest in KFC by the late
'60s. He stayed on as paid spokesman for years after, though.
Jim Jones
Norm Soley
people he sold out to (I can't remember if he sold directly to PepsiCo
or if they're a subsequent owner). Sometime in the last couple years I
read an article written by a guy who had done several cross Canada tours
with him and he mentioned that the Colonel still liked the way the
Canadian operation was run then (they were, and for a little while yet will
remain, a separate corporation) but hated what had happened in the US.
--
Norman Soley, Specialist, Digital Integrations Services, ITC District
Digital Equipment of Canada so...@trooa.enet.dec.com
Opinions expressed are mine alone and do not reflect those of Digital
Equipment Corporation or my cat Marge.
Tom Swiss (not Swift, not Suiss, Swiss!)
>
>I know that there is a marijuana extract (called Marinol) which is
>used to treat nausea in cancer patients. But from what I understand,
>it is not supposed to give you a high, and isn't much good at reducing
>nausea either.
Yep. Giving a pill to someone who's vomiting doesn't help much.
Re-legalize now! Hemp for Victory!
===============================================================================
Tom Swiss/t...@flubber.cs.umd.edu| "Born to die" | Keep your laws off my brain!
"What's so funny 'bout peace, love and understanding?" - Nick Lowe
This is a .signature antibody. Vaccinate your .sig!
"Duty then is the sublimest word in the English language. You should do your
duty in all things. You can never do more, you should never wish to do less."
-- General Robert E. Lee
Charles Lasner
>
>ObUL: Dialing 958 at a NYC payphone generates a voice recording of the
>payphone's number.
That's maybe on a NYNEX payphone, not all these crummy private payphones with
oddball extra charges.
I understand that in some cities the payphones have no incoming identity so
it isn't possible to call them. Just the thing when you are calling home
and have limited change and need them to call you back in a (limited)
emergency. So, in those places, you either have to beg for money, call the
police, or try to get operator charges billed to your home.
BTW, NYC has just switched the Bronx into the 718 area code, and has started
an all-business 917 area code, mostly for new business, such as beepers, etc.
The Bronx switch is being done gradually to allow people to get used to it,
but by next March you can't use 212 to get there anymore. Thus 212 is now
only for the island called Manhattan.
cjl (in 718)
snopes
In article <1992Aug17.1...@rchland.ibm.com>,
poo...@rchland.vnet.ibm.com (Don Fearn) writes...
>Somewhere (FOAF maybe??) I heard that Harlan Sanders, upon sampling a
>drumstick of the then new "extra crispy" KFC said, "Like a grease-ball
>on a stick." I'm sure KFC would hate something like this to get out,
As a consumer, *I'd* certainly hate for a "grease-ball on a stick" to
get out (and into my bucket o'chicken), but KFC doesn't seem too concerned
about it.
- snopes (beat Lasner to it)
+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| |
|"Asserting a statement an infinity of times does not in itself make it true."|
| |
| - Abel J. Jones |
+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| David P. Mikkelson Digital Equipment Corporation Culver City, CA USA |
+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
Charles Lasner
>
>In article <1992Aug17.1...@rchland.ibm.com>,
> poo...@rchland.vnet.ibm.com (Don Fearn) writes...
>
>>Somewhere (FOAF maybe??) I heard that Harlan Sanders, upon sampling a
>>drumstick of the then new "extra crispy" KFC said, "Like a grease-ball
>>on a stick." I'm sure KFC would hate something like this to get out,
>
> As a consumer, *I'd* certainly hate for a "grease-ball on a stick" to
> get out (and into my bucket o'chicken), but KFC doesn't seem too concerned
> about it.
>
> - snopes (beat Lasner to it)
But does it taste like chicken
cjl (beat a Terry to it)
Robert O'Brien
Really! Thanks for the FAQ list.
Maybe, just *maybe*, I can add to one of these...
I *will* go look for my references, but for now, here's what I believe to
be true:
Time: World War Two
Place: Soviet Union
Concept: Dog-mine
Device: backpack filled w/explosive strapped to dog
Trigger: antenna-like projection above pack
Theory: train dogs by feeding them *only* under tanks
Trial: works great
Deployment: hungry dog(s), live explosive, safety(s) released
Problem: Russian tanks Diesel, German tanks gas, don't *smell* anything alike
Result: unknown number of Russan tanks destroyed
I'll be back w/more *if* I find references
Jennifer Mery
>payphone's number.
ObFollowup: 830 does the same thing in Austin.
--
==============================================================================
Jennifer Mery |
Austin, Texas | gu...@wixer.catus.org
==============================================================================
Tom Louie
>payphone's number.
>
will get you this funky spliced recording informing you what phone
number you're on right now.
Tom
Ted Frank
>Time: World War Two
>Place: Soviet Union
>Concept: Dog-mine
>Device: backpack filled w/explosive strapped to dog
>Trigger: antenna-like projection above pack
>Theory: train dogs by feeding them *only* under tanks
>Trial: works great
>Deployment: hungry dog(s), live explosive, safety(s) released
>Problem: Russian tanks Diesel, German tanks gas, don't *smell* anything alike
>Result: unknown number of Russan tanks destroyed
>
>
>I'll be back w/more *if* I find references
Sounds suspiciously like the bat-explosives the United States tried
during World War II.
--
......................................................
ted frank | th...@midway.uchicago.edu | std disclaimers
the university of chicago law skool, chicago, illinois
you can't throw me to the lions -- i'm charlton heston
Scott Cromar
> Tb.Tomatoes are not vegetables, they're berries.
That would mean that ketchup is a kind of berry jam, wouldn't it?
> F. Ethnic eateries (Chinese/East Indian/Italian) use cat/dog/human meat in place
> of beef/pork as expected.
> ["The Eaten Pets" and "Further Ethnic Stereotype Legends" in TMP]
Mike Berger
Cute, but definitely a UL. Marijuana has to be heated to activate the
psychoactive components, and they are not particularly stable at room
temperature (or higher). So it isn't very feasible. Also, the
cannabinols and cannabidiols aren't water soluble - how would you
get them absorbed into the skin?
--
Mike Berger
Department of Statistics, University of Illinois
AT&TNET 217-244-6067
Internet ber...@atropa.stat.uiuc.edu
~WISP at CU~
>amco...@ulkyvx.louisville.edu writes:
>>A friend of mine recently returned from Chicago said that she heard that some
>>enterprising pharmacology students at a midwestern university had made,
>>entirely for recreational purposes, transdermal slow-release patches for
>>marijuana (a la Nicoderm). Has anyone else heard about this? Sounds like a UL.
>*----
>Cute, but definitely a UL. Marijuana has to be heated to activate the
>psychoactive components, and they are not particularly stable at room
>temperature (or higher). So it isn't very feasible. Also, the
>cannabinols and cannabidiols aren't water soluble - how would you
>get them absorbed into the skin?
Don't know about the maryjane, but the whole point of the cannabes(tm) is that
they are fat solubel. Water soluble compounds don't pass through the skin,
whereas fat soluble ones do (like nerve gases etc.) Of course, not all fat
soluble compounds pass through skin - it's more complicated than that - but as
a rule of thumb (no, not another UL!!!) it's pretty reliable...
Later,
The Wisp. [pass me the gasoline...]
--
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chris Williams <cs...@uk.ac.warwick.csv> aka <cs...@csv.warwick.ac.uk>
"Tony Greig in the slips, legs apart, waiting for a tickle"
Brian Johnson (thanks to A. Simha 8^>)
Jared Dahl
|>
|> In article <Aug.17.17.15....@math.rutgers.edu>, cro...@math.rutgers.edu (Scott Cromar) writes:
|> >I know that there is a marijuana extract (called Marinol) which is
|>
|> New UL (you heard it here first): Marinol is named for Marin County,
|> California (which reputedly has a high per-capita consumption of
|> marijuana).
Or it could be for Cheech Marin, of "Cheech & Chong" fame.
ObUL: Kibo once had the leading role in a "snuff" film.
--
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
| Jared Dahl | I deserve respect for the things I did not do. |
|(jd...@rchland.ibm.com) | |
| IBM, Rochester | -- Vice President Dan "the Man" Quayl(e) |
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Opinions expressed are mine, not Dan Quayle's or IBM's.
mor...@ramblr.enet.dec.com
>Cute, but definitely a UL. Marijuana has to be heated to activate the
>psychoactive components, and they are not particularly stable at room
>temperature (or higher). So it isn't very feasible. Also, the
>cannabinols and cannabidiols aren't water soluble - how would you
>get them absorbed into the skin?
DMSO is widely used in medicine to transport various stuff through the skin.
Water would be a poor choice since the skin is quite waterproof.
-Mike
Seth Breidbart
las...@watsun.cc.columbia.edu (Charles Lasner) writes:
>BTW, NYC has just switched the Bronx into the 718 area code, and has started
>an all-business 917 area code, mostly for new business, such as beepers, etc.
>The Bronx switch is being done gradually to allow people to get used to it,
>but by next March you can't use 212 to get there anymore. Thus 212 is now
>only for the island called Manhattan.
>cjl (in 718)
No, 212 is for the Borough called Manhattan, which is the county named
New York. The island of Manhattan has different borders.
Seth "in 212" Breidbart se...@fid.morgan.com
The exact distinction between them would make for a good UL.
Jim Kasprzak
|>>BTW, NYC has just switched the Bronx into the 718 area code, and has started
|>>an all-business 917 area code, mostly for new business, such as beepers, etc.
|>>The Bronx switch is being done gradually to allow people to get used to it,
|>>but by next March you can't use 212 to get there anymore. Thus 212 is now
|>>only for the island called Manhattan.
|>
|> New York. The island of Manhattan has different borders.
|>
know, the Borough of Manhattan includes (besides Manhattan Island itself)
a few blocks across the Spuyten Duyvil in the Bronx, and possibly the docks
on the Brooklyn side of the East River (I'm not 100% sure about that).
Anyone have a good reference for this? Are Governor's, Ellis and Liberty
Islands also considered part of Manhattan Borough? And just why _is_ that
little piece of the Bronx included?
------------------------------------------------------------------
__ Live from Capitaland, heart of the Empire State...
___/ | Jim Kasprzak, computer operator @ RPI, Troy, NY, USA
/____ *| Pro-Environment. Pro-Education. Pro-Family. Pro-Choice.
\_| Pro-Change. Pro-America. Pro-Clinton.
==== e-mail: kas...@rpi.edu or kasp...@mts.rpi.edu
Andy Stevens
|> In article <1992Aug19.0...@fid.morgan.com>, se...@fid.morgan.com (Seth Breidbart) writes:
|> |> No, 212 is for the Borough called Manhattan, which is the county named
|> |> New York. The island of Manhattan has different borders.
|>
|> know, the Borough of Manhattan includes (besides Manhattan Island itself)
|> a few blocks across the Spuyten Duyvil in the Bronx, and possibly the docks
|> on the Brooklyn side of the East River (I'm not 100% sure about that).
|>
A good reference for this is a good ol' AAA New York City street map,
which shows the few blocks in the Bronx which are part of NY County,
but not the docks in Brooklyn.
Does anybody know the historical reason for those few blocks in the
Bronx?
--andy
Richard Alpert
> Anyone have a good reference for this? Are Governor's, Ellis and Liberty
>Islands also considered part of Manhattan Borough?
Would that they were. Summa cum dolar, I regret to inform you that Liberty
Island is NEW JERSEY!!
- Richard Alpert
Steven Janowsky
> Anyone have a good reference for this? Are Governor's, Ellis and Liberty
> Islands also considered part of Manhattan Borough?
Certainly not Liberty Island since THAT is part of New Jersey!
Bruce Tindall
>little piece of the Bronx included?
I've heard [there's that unimpeachable reference again!] that the
little piece of Manhattan that's on the mainland used to be connected
to the island, and separated from the mainland by the (East? Harlem?)
River, but the river was diverted for some purpose and the old river
bed was filled in, connecting these few acres of Manhattan to the
mainland and cutting them off from the rest of the island.
When the World Trade Center was the tallest building in the U.S.,
there was a trick question (from Asimov, I think): "What's the
tallest building in North America?" Turned out to be something in
Chicago or Boston, since the World Trade Center was not
"in" North America, but "on an island off the coast of North America."
Smartass.
David Loshin
Newsgroups: alt.folklore.urban,nyc.general
Path: think.com!mips!darwin.sura.net!jvnc.net!yale.edu!yale!gumby!destroyer!sol.ctr.columbia.edu!madvlsi.columbia.edu!stevens
From: ste...@madvlsi.columbia.edu (Andy Stevens)
Organization: Columbia University
References: <1992Aug17...@ulkyvx.louisville.edu> <1992Aug17....@panix.com> <1992Aug18.0...@news.columbia.edu> <1992Aug19.0...@fid.morgan.com> <=2fytf=@rpi.edu>
Sender: ne...@ctr.columbia.edu (The Daily Lose)
Date: Wed, 19 Aug 1992 17:09:47 GMT
X-Posted-From: france.madvlsi.columbia.edu
X-Posted-Through: sol.ctr.columbia.edu
Lines: 20
--andy
The river that separates the tip of Manhattan from the Spuyten Duyvil at
some point in time changed course; originally the island included that area
of (what is now) mainland Bronx.
mor...@ramblr.enet.dec.com
Gee, did NY and NJ have a war that NY lost or something? Every map I've
seen showed Liberty Island as being part of NY (State, at least), despite
being on the NJ side of a line drawn down the middle of the river.
An exception of some sort, based on some ancient treaty or war or something.
Probably the same reason Staten Island is part of NY despite being closer
to NJ.
Anyone know the story _why_ Liberty Island belongs to NY?
-Mike
Richard Alpert
mor...@ramblr.enet.dec.com writes:
>Gee, did NY and NJ have a war that NY lost or something? Every map I've
>seen showed Liberty Island as being part of NY (State, at least), despite
>being on the NJ side of a line drawn down the middle of the river.
>An exception of some sort, based on some ancient treaty or war or something.
>Probably the same reason Staten Island is part of NY despite being closer
>to NJ.
My version of history includes an anecdote about two early governors (?) who
had a rowboat race around Staten Island, with the Island going to the winner.
New York won, much to the disappointment of then and contemporary Staten
Islanders.
- Richard Alpert
Charles Lasner
>
>In article <=2fytf=@rpi.edu>, kas...@isaac.its.rpi.edu (Jim Kasprzak) writes:
>>And just why _is_ that
>>little piece of the Bronx included?
>
>I've heard [there's that unimpeachable reference again!] that the
>little piece of Manhattan that's on the mainland used to be connected
>to the island, and separated from the mainland by the (East? Harlem?)
>River, but the river was diverted for some purpose and the old river
>bed was filled in, connecting these few acres of Manhattan to the
>mainland and cutting them off from the rest of the island.
But the original post stands: these people in the affected area will have
their area code changed to 718, and will "logically" be in the Bronx. Thus
only those on the island of Manhattan will be 212.
(There is still the question of the other few islands (Riker's, Roosevelt,
Ellis, etc., which one has the military base with the swimming pool on it?)
and what area code their phones are, but the Bronx ones are going with the
rest of the Bronx in '93.)
cjl
Cliff Heller
It is true, I've used it many times. Here's the real UL, though:
If you hear a busy signal after you dial 958, then your phone is tapped.
--
/ \ Reverend fnord | "King Kong died for your sins!"
/ \ fn...@panix.com |
/ <0> \ | "Don't just eat a hamburger,
/_______\ Church of Obfuscatology, Inc. | eat the HELL out of it!"
Charles Lasner
>
>It is true, I've used it many times. Here's the real UL, though:
>
>If you hear a busy signal after you dial 958, then your phone is tapped.
To inject a few phone-phreaking facts:
There is (was) a method to cause the ANI equipment to be "off" by one in
giving its announcement of your number. So, if your number is 456-1234, then
you instead get:
x45 6123
Where x is 0 if there is nothing special going on, and 3 means "service
observance". Rumor has it that 6 means the phone is not to be billed at
all (internal telco number).
cjl (I don't do these things; just pretend I make them up :-).)
Craig Becker
berger@atropa (Mike Berger) writes:
> amco...@ulkyvx.louisville.edu writes:
> >A friend of mine recently returned from Chicago said that she heard that some
> >enterprising pharmacology students at a midwestern university had made,
> >entirely for recreational purposes, transdermal slow-release patches for
> >marijuana (a la Nicoderm). Has anyone else heard about this? Sounds like a UL.
> *----
> Cute, but definitely a UL. Marijuana has to be heated to activate the
> psychoactive components, and they are not particularly stable at room
> temperature (or higher). So it isn't very feasible. Also, the
> cannabinols and cannabidiols aren't water soluble - how would you
> get them absorbed into the skin?
Well, _marijuana_ may have to be heated, but THC in tablet form has
been available for some years for the treatment of cancer and glaucoma
patients.
Granted that THC isn't water soluble, but THC _is_ soluble in ethyl
alcohol. Could it be used instead?
However, it probably _is_ an UL, as I am led to believe that extracting
THC from marijuana is a non-trivial process.
(unpaid endorsement: I've been using Nicoderm patches for the past week
and a half to quit a heavy smoking habit of 12 years. They're great! :-)
Craig
--
-- "You can expect virtually Craig Becker, Object Technology Products --
-- anything from a people who had Internet: cra...@ot.austin.ibm.com --
-- nuclear weapons in the early IBM TR: cra...@woofer.austin.ibm.com --
-- seventeenth century." VNET: CRAIGB at AUSVM1 --
David Esan
I believe that this is still a point of contention between NY and NJ.
--
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--> David Esan d...@moscom.com
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Phydeaux
>Actually, Liberty Island is disputed territory. NJ and NY have been dis-
>puting over the island ever since the Statue of Liberty got planted there.
>(It belonged to NJ before the Statue arrived, and then suddenly NY claimed
>it. NJ has been protesting ever since.)
The most recent fight I know of was over the proceeds of sales tax
collections on the island. Phone and water connections come from New
Jersey and I think they threatened to cut the island off...
reb
Caroline E. Bryan
Actually, Liberty Island is disputed territory. NJ and NY have been dis-
puting over the island ever since the Statue of Liberty got planted there.
(It belonged to NJ before the Statue arrived, and then suddenly NY claimed
it. NJ has been protesting ever since.)
Carrie c...@rechenau.unify.com x6244 ---------------------+
| "I'm new to C and need to know how to get random numbers returned." "Just |
| send them back to the manufacturer with the original packaging and the |
+ receipt. What? You didn't keep the receipt?" - Anon. -------------+
Scott Barman
Gee... youse guys have to stop reading those Jersey press releases.
When the big controversy of who owns it came up (around the time New
York changed license plates), the basis for ownership went back to the
maps kept by the US Geological Survey. These maps have shown both
Liberty and Ellis Islands as part of New York City. In fact, up until
the controversy, New York was collecting sales taxes on good sold on
Liberty Island.
When the controversy hit, New Jersey was not making any money from
Liberty Island. With Ellis Island opening and the then proposed ferry
from Liberty State Park, New Jersey took this oppotunity to make a claim
on both islands. The net results was that there would be a "sharing"
of the islands and the revnues by both states. Neither Island is
considered part of either state as a result of the compromise (according
to USGS maps). However, both Islands are served by New York Telephone,
the New York City water supply, and if a fire should unfortunatly break
out, the New York City fire department will be the first called after
the Coast Guard from Govenor's Island (other general services are
supplied by the National Parks Service). HOWEVER, the quarters used by
Parks Service personnel assigned to both landmarks have been moved from
Staten Island to New Jersey. Waste disposal (both trash and septic
tank) is handled by a New Jersey company and disposed of in New Jersey.
Drink the water and, when you are finished, leave it in New Jersey.
(make [in]appropriate comments as you wish!! :-)
--
scott barman | <This space intentionally left blank>
sc...@asd.com |
(I can barely speak for myself, you expect me to speak for my employer??)
Derek Tearne
>
>August 17, 1992
>
> Official Usenet Alt.Folklore.Urban Frequently Posted Legends
>
>OFFICIAL PETER OF AFU
> - Peter van der Linden
This is all well and good but.... Where is he these days. Surely he's
not lurking with all them Terries. It's just I haven't seen any posts
from PvdL for sooo long and I was wondering if this portends the 'imminent
death of the Net'.
>Have you ever wondered how those people have gotten the name at the end
>as thoughtful posters of reliable information. They have consistently added
>value to various debates by sharing their point of view, and often researching
>difficult questions which arise on the net, and posting authoritative facts
>citing sources.
I tried that but it didn't work.
>The unofficial way to get on the list is to give me a big payoff.
Ah. Thats what I was doing wrong. The two fifty is in the mail.
Derek "And all this time I thought the password was Churchill" Tearne
"Or was that Disraeli"
--
Derek Tearne. -- de...@nezsdc.icl.co.nz -- Fujitsu/ICL New Zealand --
Steven Bellovin
Umm -- the government of New Jersey claims that, but they couldn't find
a court that was willing to rule on the subject. Want some proof that
it's in New York? Buy something there, and see what the sales tax rate
is...
Andy Stevens
|> A good reference for this is a good ol' AAA New York City street map,
|> which shows the few blocks in the Bronx which are part of NY County,
|> but not the docks in Brooklyn.
|>
I'm correcting myself here. A close look at my Hagstrom map of
Manhattan shows that the Brookly piers ARE part of New York County!!
Anybody know why?
--andy
Alan J Rosenthal
>Marijuana has to be heated to activate the psychoactive components,
You can get high from eating marijuana, though it takes much more of the stuff
than smoking it does.
Alan J Rosenthal
>since the World Trade Center was not "in" North America, but "on an island off
>the coast of North America." Smartass.
Surely North America is the general region, and not merely the main island.
Would Asimov claim that the continental United States (or whatever the term is
for the 48 states other than Alaska and Hawaii, plus Washington D.C.) is not
in North America?
Rich Greenberg
Correct, but the MJ still has to be heated first. This is normally
done by a process known as either "cooking" or "baking". Which one
depends on the exact nature of the food item(s) involved.
--
Rich Greenberg - N6LRT - 310-649-0238 - ri...@hatch.socal.com
L. D. Nelson
>> Anyone have a good reference for this? Are Governor's, Ellis and Liberty
>>Islands also considered part of Manhattan Borough?
>
>Would that they were. Summa cum dolar, I regret to inform you that Liberty
>Island is NEW JERSEY!!
>
I was at Ellis Island July 3rd and was told by one of the guides that
Liberty and Ellis Islands ARE part of New York, It is the water rights
that are owned by New Jersey.
So anything on the Islands belong to NY but anything dug up below a
certain point (like the water level I beleave) belongs to New Jersey.
--- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Lawrence D. Nelson | FAX: (718) 423-9620
Queensborough Community College | Voice: (718) 631-6274
of the City University of New York |
Data Processing Center / Room A303 | ld...@cunyvm.bitnet or
Bayside, NY 11364 USA | ldnqb%cunyvm...@cunyvm.cuny.edu
- - (I am also know as) - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
ld...@qb001.bitnet or ldnqb%qb001....@cunyvm.cuny.edu (WORK!)
ar...@cleveland.freenet.edu (mail will be fwd to my QB001 account)
GEnie: Larry.nelson (I dont get on that often)
*** Please send all mail to my QB001 account - thank you ***
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
LUCIFER
Talking of tapped phones, if the tap is poorly done, the phone will ring for
no reason every once in a while.
(this was verified in the USSR 5 years ago - I was staying in a two room
hotel suite, and in each room there were two plastic cones on the ceiling,
connected by a wire running the legth of the room. And the phone rang like
krazy. the Sovs didn't particularly care if you knew that they were listening
in (hell, I joked about listening devices in the suite, and talked to the
taps a couple times. an amusing way to kill a couple minutes))
Drew Lawson
That would be the contiguous or lower-48 states. A fairly common error
(and root of various "trick" questions) is leaving Alaska out of the
continental states. The continent is North America, and Alaska is on
North America (don't know about the Alutians, though).
BTW, Manhattan (and the other islands of NYC) is resting on the North
American continent. The continental shelf extends quite a way on the
Atlantic side.
Drew "I love altases" Lawson
--
Drew Lawson If you're not part of the solution,
law...@acuson.com you're part of the precipitate
Drew Lawson
>
>Derek "And all this time I thought the password was Churchill" Tearne
> "Or was that Disraeli"
Have you ever heard about what happens if you chant "Churchill is Disraeli"
in front of a mirror in a dark room?
Phil Gustafson
>>
>>OFFICIAL PETER OF AFU
>> - Peter van der Linden
>
>This is all well and good but.... Where is he these days. Surely he's
>not lurking with all them Terries. It's just I haven't seen any posts
>from PvdL for sooo long and I was wondering if this portends the 'imminent
>death of the Net'.
PvdL has chosen to absent himself from a.f.u for the nonce, probably because
the high recycling rate got to him, and partly because he's writing yet
another book.
He did take the time to snipe at hsr4 last week, so there's still hope.
Phil "How long is a nonce, anyway?" Gustafson
--
|play: ph...@zorch.SF-Bay.ORG; {ames|pyramid|vsi1}!zorch!phil |
|work: (Under Construction) | Phil Gustafson |
| "Nothing left to do but smile, smile, smile." |
Phil Gustafson
>
>Or [marijuana] can be extracted with alcohol and imbibed. No heating.
>
To no good effect, though. As Freewheeling Franklin sez, "Drinking beer and
smoking dope at the same time is like pissing into the wind."
Phil "Insert cat cartoon here" Gustafson
YuNoHoo
>
> Have you ever heard about what happens if you chant "Churchill is Disraeli"
> in front of a mirror in a dark room?
Why would anybody have a mirror in a darkroom?
---
YoNoHoo "not this time"
Scott Cromar
> PvdL has chosen to absent himself from a.f.u for the nonce, probably because
> the high recycling rate got to him, and partly because he's writing yet
> another book.
> He did take the time to snipe at hsr4 last week, so there's still hope.
A FOAF heard a rumor that he was shooting a snuff film with hsr4 in
the starring role.
--Scott "I thought he said Peter was *snoping* at hsr4" Cromar
Cynthia Kandolf
>In article <1992Aug24....@acuson.com>, Drew Lawson writes:
>>
>> Have you ever heard about what happens if you chant "Churchill is
Disraeli"
>> in front of a mirror in a dark room?
>
>Why would anybody have a mirror in a darkroom?
So they could chew wintergreen Life Savers in front of it, of course.
-Cindy Kandolf
ci...@solan.unit.no
Trondheim, Norway
Phil Gustafson
>ph...@zorch.SF-Bay.ORG (Phil Gustafson) writes:
>
>>As Freewheeling Franklin sez, "Drinking beer and
>>smoking dope at the same time is like pissing into the wind."
>
>I don't know where you got your information, but it is not correct.
>
> 1) Dope + alcohol will get the drinker/smoker more hammered
>than either one alone.
>
> 2) THC can be extracted from uncooked marijuana using grain
>alcohol, which can be injested for full effect, as from mj cooked
>into food.
>
The mind boggles at the thought of someone thinking of a Freak Brothers
comic strip as a source of information. The drugs don't cancel themselves
out, any more than coffee and brandy. I speculate that Franklin meant
that the consumption of beer interfered with his enjoyment of MJ, and
versa vice.
Phil "Someone wrote that Fat Freddy said this, and may be right. But I
remember Freddy saying, 'Kill speeds! er, Peed Skills! ah, Skill Peeds!..."
Jeff Mortensen
>
> Sounds suspiciously like the bat-explosives the United States tried
> during World War II.
Did anybody see the special on the bat attack on Japan a few
months ago. The army really did have a plan set up which would
drop thousands of bats which had flammable explosives strapped
to them. They tried it out on an army base in the desert, and
the plan backfired. It worked too good. The bats went for all
the major structures on the base, and it burnt down over 80% of
the base. If the atomic bomb had not worked, this plan would
have been used, and Japan most probably would have been burned
to the ground. A different ending, but the result would have
been the same.
Morty
Anthony Datri
> 1) Dope + alcohol will get the drinker/smoker more hammered
>than either one alone.
It can also get the user totally killed. Me, I'll probably just use a gun.
David A. Honig
Only the ethanaol is toxic. And if you want to kill yourself in a *car*,
why, just go without sleep for a day, its cheaper.
--
David "Dances with Motion Sensors" Honig
"Would you vote for a president who was too stupid to figure out how to
inhale?"
Doctor Science
In article <BtK4x...@zorch.SF-Bay.ORG>, ph...@zorch.SF-Bay.ORG
(Phil Gustafson) answers the Great Question of Life, the Universe, and
Everything, to wit: Where's the Great net.Peter?
|>PvdL has chosen to absent himself from a.f.u for the nonce, probably because
|>the high recycling rate got to him, and partly because he's writing yet
|>another book.
|>
|>He did take the time to snipe at hsr4 last week, so there's still hope.
|>
|>Phil "How long is a nonce, anyway?" Gustafson
A nonce is just about long enough to reach the ground, if you're headed West
on cenTral Expressway. otherwise it's about 35 picoseconds.
--
Nolan "Metrics for sale" Hinshaw
Internet: no...@twg.com Dingalingnet: (415)962-7197
"If you don't know how to do something, you don't know how to do it
with a computer." David Wittenberg, in Risks Digest 13.70
"Boy, was I in for a dose of reality." Randall K. Abler
"... necrophilia doesn't really hurt anybody." Rick Gordon
"Well, first of all, your stance is too wide"
!Edward Steichen
In article <1992Aug26....@nntp.nta.no>, st...@hal.nta.no (King Haakon)
Asks the 64 centime question:
|>Why would anybody have a mirror in a darkroom?
For the image reversal process! Sheesh! Whatta photodope!
--
Nolan "Bug-of-the-Shutter-Variety" Hinshaw
Tom Zych
>Morty
>
I think that the B29 incendiary raids did a pretty good job of burning large
parts of Japan to the ground, without flying mammilian help. BTW, Dave Barry
wrote a column about the bats once, don't remember exactly when...
Tom Zych tjz2...@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu
Jared Dahl
|> mo...@hpfcso.FC.HP.COM (Jeff Mortensen) writes:
|>
|> >In alt.folklore.urban, th...@ellis.uchicago.edu (Ted Frank) writes:
|>
|> >>
|> >> Sounds suspiciously like the bat-explosives the United States tried
|> >> during World War II.
|> >
|> > have been used, and Japan most probably would have been burned
|> > to the ground. A different ending, but the result would have
|> > been the same.
I don't think that firebombing produces radiation burns and genetic
defects. Not that firebombing is a particularly pleasant thing...
|>
|> >Morty
|> >
|>
|> I think that the B29 incendiary raids did a pretty good job of burning large
|> parts of Japan to the ground, without flying mammilian help. BTW, Dave Barry
|> wrote a column about the bats once, don't remember exactly when...
|>
|> Tom Zych tjz2...@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu
|>
I seem to remember the US doing the same thing to Dresden, Germany
also. More people were killed in Dresden and Tokyo than Nagasaki
and Hiroshima.
--
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
| Jared Dahl | "My heart is human, my blood is boiling, |
| Systems Programmer | my brain IBM" |
| IBM - Rochester, MN | -- STYX, "Mr. Roboto" |
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Opinions expressed are mine, not IBM's.
Eugene N. Miya
Operation Pigeon in his autobiography (vol. II I am recalling).
>> If the atomic bomb had not worked, this plan would
>> have been used, and Japan most probably would have been burned
>> to the ground. A different ending, but the result would have
>> been the same.
Not likely to have been nearly as effective. It's an island which is far
more rainy than the test area. Also approaching a cold wet winter.
>I think that the B29 incendiary raids did a pretty good job of burning large
>parts of Japan to the ground,
Yeah, I would say so. My Mom (an American citizen) was there underneath
them when they did it. (Tokyo.)
--eugene miya, NASA Ames Research Center, eug...@orville.nas.nasa.gov
Resident Cynic, Rock of Ages Home for Retired Hackers
{uunet,mailrus,other gateways}!ames!eugene
Second Favorite email message: Returned mail: Cannot send message for 3 days
A Ref: Mathematics and Plausible Reasoning, vol. 1, G. Polya
sine nomine
: ph...@zorch.SF-Bay.ORG (Phil Gustafson) writes:
:
: >(James Douglas Del-Vecchio) writes:
: >To no good effect, though. As Freewheeling Franklin sez, "Drinking beer and
: >smoking dope at the same time is like pissing into the wind."
:
:
: Two urban legends in one?
: I don't know where you got your information, but it is not correct.
: 1) Dope + alcohol will get the drinker/smoker more hammered
: than either one alone.
it's best to be really careful mixing the two, though. i've known
several people who've gotten extremely sick by doing pot when they were
totally wasted on alcohol. i dunno if it's an individual thing or if
it's related to the amount of alcohol ingested before smoking.
--
sine nomine
debbie martinson
"marley was a rasta; moses was a jew; jesus was an outlaw, just like
me and you. let love be our religion 'til this life is through: the
next best thing to heaven is a sinful life with you" -- timbuk
~WISP at CU~
>In article <Btnny...@news.cso.uiuc.edu>, tjz2...@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu (Tom Zych) writes:
>|> mo...@hpfcso.FC.HP.COM (Jeff Mortensen) writes:
>|>
>|> >In alt.folklore.urban, th...@ellis.uchicago.edu (Ted Frank) writes:
>|>
>|> >>
>|> >> Sounds suspiciously like the bat-explosives the United States tried
>|> >> during World War II.
>|> >
>|> > the base. If the atomic bomb had not worked, this plan would
>|> > have been used, and Japan most probably would have been burned
>|> > to the ground. A different ending, but the result would have
>|> > been the same.
> ^^^^
>I don't think that firebombing produces radiation burns and genetic
>defects. Not that firebombing is a particularly pleasant thing...
>
>
>|>
>|> >Morty
>|> >
>|>
>|> I think that the B29 incendiary raids did a pretty good job of burning large
>|> parts of Japan to the ground, without flying mammilian help. BTW, Dave Barry
>|> wrote a column about the bats once, don't remember exactly when...
>|>
>|> Tom Zych tjz2...@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu
>|>
>
>I seem to remember the US doing the same thing to Dresden, Germany
>also. More people were killed in Dresden and Tokyo than Nagasaki
>and Hiroshima.
Absolutely. Of course, it was 'Bomber' Harris who ordered the operation,
and over 1,000 RAF bombers went by night, about 300 US B17s (mainly) by
day. Credit where credit's due. :-( After all, you Yanks get the blame for
everything else...
The Wisp.
--
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chris Williams <cs...@uk.ac.warwick.csv> aka <cs...@csv.warwick.ac.uk>
"Tony Greig in the slips, legs apart, waiting for a tickle"
Brian Johnson (thanks to A. Simha 8^>)
Richard Joltes
>|> I think that the B29 incendiary raids did a pretty good job of burning large
>|> parts of Japan to the ground without flying mammilian help. BTW, Dave Barry
>|> wrote a column about the bats once, don't remember exactly when...
>|>
>|> Tom Zych tjz2...@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu
>|>
>
>I seem to remember the US doing the same thing to Dresden, Germany
>also. More people were killed in Dresden and Tokyo than Nagasaki
>and Hiroshima.
The attitude about both events was pretty interesting, though. I wrote a paper
on the attitude of Americans toward the Japanese and Germans during WWII, and
recall that there were few "real" articles about the bombing of Hamburg and
Dresden--there was one in the NY Times that said "the port of Hamburg is
burning furiously, and no ships are permitted to approach." Reports of the
firebombing of Tokyo, however, produced sensational headlines, and there was
one quote (can't recall who said it) that said, verbatim, "properly kindled,
Japanese cities will burn like autumn leaves."
A lot of racism was in evidence...there was some sympathy with the Germans,
and a sense of sadness that such old cities were being destroyed. But the
reports of Tokyo's destruction were rife with anti-Japanese invectives and
almost a sense of glee. Pretty weird, overall. But at that point there was
little understanding of Asian culture in the U.S., and more animosity than
anyone would probably like to admit to.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dick "research? In AFU? HA!" Joltes jol...@husc.harvard.edu
Hardware & Networking Manager, Computer Services jol...@husc.bitnet
Harvard University Science Center
"Mind you, not as bad as the night Archie Pettigrew ate some
sheep's testicles for a bet...God, that bloody sheep kicked him..."
WA...@slacvm.slac.stanford.edu
(Richard Joltes) says:
>(The)
>firebombing of Tokyo, however, produced sensational headlines, and there was
>one quote (can't recall who said it) that said, verbatim, "properly kindled,
>Japanese cities will burn like autumn leaves."
It was
General Curtis LeMay, architect of "Rolling Thunder," the carpet-bombing
campaign carried out by B-52s in Viet Nam as well as the incendiary raids
on Japan. Read _A Torch to My Enemy_ by Martin Caiden for more information
on the fire-bombing of Japan.
An excellent book covering the racsist aspects, in both camps, of the Pacific
Theater of Operations during World War II is _War Without Mercy_. It explores
racsism on both sides of the Pacific Ocean during WWII. One idea the author
(who's name escapes me) explores is that of the "good" enemy. Whereas the
concept of the "Good German," a basically good individual caught up in the
political and military machinations of his/her government, existed in the
popular culture (films, books, magazine articles) of the time the concept of
the "Good Japanese" is entirely lacking in the same media.
There were perjorative appellations for Germans to be sure but they were not of
a purely racial nature. "Kraut," the most common term used by GIs in the ETO,
doesn't convey the same force as "Jap" which was almost universally preceeded
by the adjective "Dirty." The Germans were satirized as being overly officious
while the Japanese were usually depicted as sub-humans, the monkey being by far
and away the most popular characature. This was much the same as the German
tendency, reviled by Americans at the time, to refer to Jews, Poles and Slavs
in general as "Untermenchen" or sub-humans.
It is true that the Japanese were perceived as a more ferocious, barbaric
enemy than the Germans due to early and well-publicized episodes like the
"Rape of Nanking" and the Bataan death march. These distinctions tended to
fade as news of the "Final Solution" and Eastern front atrocities filtered back
during the middle of 1945. It is perhaps due as much to the nature of the
Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor as to the easily recognizable racial
differences between Caucasian and Oriental soldiers that the Pacific War, the
planet's first fully mechanized race war, was so easily divided along racial
lines.
Why the heck am I posting this to a.f.u?
Brian Waugh | "What's for dinner?"
WA...@SLACVM.SLAC.STANFORD.EDU | George Bush
bill nelson
: In article <94...@bu.edu> alp...@cs.bu.edu (Richard Alpert) writes:
: >In article <=2fytf=@rpi.edu> kas...@rpi.edu writes:
: >> Anyone have a good reference for this? Are Governor's, Ellis and Liberty
: >
: >Would that they were. Summa cum dolar, I regret to inform you that Liberty
: >Island is NEW JERSEY!!
:
Yep - I understand that neither one want it.
Bill
Serge Volkoff
st89...@pip.cc.brandeis.edu (LUCIFER) writes:
>Talking of tapped phones, if the tap is poorly done, the phone will ring for
>no reason every once in a while.
>
>(this was verified in the USSR 5 years ago - I was staying in a two room
>hotel suite, and in each room there were two plastic cones on the ceiling,
>connected by a wire running the legth of the room. And the phone rang like
>krazy. the Sovs didn't particularly care if you knew that they were listening
>in (hell, I joked about listening devices in the suite, and talked to the
>taps a couple times. an amusing way to kill a couple minutes))
>
Might as well have been as simple as a fire/smoke detector [or are you
kidding]. One of these things is installed in my office (a plastic cone
on the ceiling, right) but it's connected to the fire alarm station.
So disappointing. As for the phone going krazy [crazy?], the telephone
network in downtown Moscow used to be quite unreliable with noise,
misrouted calls, etc. until very recently when older exchanges [heard
that some of them were operated since 1911, but I personally don't
believe that] were replaced [and lots of ## changed in the process].
A Soviet UL: Americans staying in an Intourist hotel in Moscow messing
with these things on the ceiling [now guess what happened...] the room
flooded with water from the sprinkler (sp?) system.
Serge
uncertain_future
>A Soviet UL: Americans staying in an Intourist hotel in Moscow messing
>with these things on the ceiling [now guess what happened...] the room
>flooded with water from the sprinkler (sp?) system.
(variation: couple spends an evening at the Watergate hotel, husband
thinks, "hey, maybe it's still being bugged" -checks everywhere, finally
under the carpet, a disk with four screws. Unscrews it, puts it away.
next day the manager walks in somewhat worried, asking "mr. and mrs. [xx],
how did you like the accommodations? how do you like the service, the
room, everything; tell me, how do you like this hotel?"
They reply that they love it-- best service, but "why do you ask?"
Manager replies, "oh, the couple below you complained; a chandelier fell on
them."
[actually a Henny Youngman joke, but I had to stick it in
here nonetheless]
ObUL: Hotel gift-shops have highest shoplifting rate-- thus hotel
employs sec.guards to pose as fellow tourist shoppers to spy
on you... pesty kid-guards-to-be are paid to do this too!
U. every hotel has a 'Club-13', which secretly sells reasonably priced
food to those lucky enough to get in...
--
-ivan forward all fires to iam3...@uxa.cso.uiuc.edu
Joanne Petersen
will get you through times of no dope." :-)
Jim Kasprzak
Okay, since I started this thread, I'll attempt to finish it. This is the
extent of New York County, which is coterminous with the Borough of
Manhattan, according to the DeLorme and Hagstrom atlases, both of which
can be considered reliable sources and are readily available in major
bookstores (at least in the northeastern US).
- Manhattan Island
- Ward's Island
- Roosevelt Island
- Governor's Island
- The Marble Hill section of the Bronx
- Some of the East River piers in Brooklyn
The reasons for including the latter two, as far as I can determine:
Marble Hill was originally part of Manhattan Island, but a new channel
was dredged for the Harlem River and the old one filled in. The piers
in Brooklyn were administered by the City of New York for tax reasons
(read: so New York would get the money - corruption is no new thing to
the Big Apple) back when New York and Brooklyn were separate cities.
Despite their proximity to New Jersey, Ellis and Bedloe (Liberty)
Islands are considered part of New York. None of the maps specifically
assign them to Manhattan, but I'd assume that they fall under its
jurisdiction since it's the closest of the boroughs. Since both of
these islands are part of the National Park system and, to the best
of my knowledge, neither has any permanent residents, the islands are
probably administered by the US Department of the Interior, but if the
National Park service needs help with things like fire or police
coverage, it'd probably come from Manhattan.
------------------------------------------------------------------
__ Live from Capitaland, heart of the Empire State...
___/ | Jim Kasprzak, computer operator @ RPI, Troy, NY, USA
/____ *| Pro-Environment. Pro-Education. Pro-Family. Pro-Choice.
\_| Pro-Change. Pro-America. Pro-Clinton.
==== e-mail: kas...@rpi.edu or kasp...@mts.rpi.edu
Jim Saxe
(uncertain_future) writes:
>se...@ippi.msk.su (Serge Volkoff) writes:
>>A Soviet UL: Americans staying in an Intourist hotel in Moscow messing
>>with these things on the ceiling [now guess what happened...] the room
>>flooded with water from the sprinkler (sp?) system.
>
>(variation: couple spends an evening at the Watergate hotel, husband
>thinks, "hey, maybe it's still being bugged" -checks everywhere, finally
>under the carpet, a disk with four screws. Unscrews it, puts it away.
>a chandelier fell on them."
> [actually a Henny Youngman joke, but I had to stick it in
> here nonetheless]
Interesting. The first time I heard the chandelier story (sometime in the
1960's) it was a supposedly true story about an American athlete visiting
the Soviet Union for some sort of international competetion. He decides
to search his hotel room for "bugs," eventually looks under the carpet,
finds a bolt, unscrews it, and hears a loud crash as the chandelier falls
in the room below.
Some time after 1985 I heard essentially the same story (told as "true",
of course) on Paul Harvey's "News and Comment." There were a few
differences: In one version the guy was actively searching the hotel
room, while in the other he just happened to notice a bump under the
carpet and decided to investigate; I'm reasonably sure that Paul Harvey's
athlete had a different sport than the one in the first version I heard;
and, of course, Paul Harvey claimed to be reporting a recent incident even
though the story was at least fifteen (and probably over twenty) years
old. [Could it actually have happened twice? :-)].
Can anyone supply specific references to early versions of this story
either as a "true" incident (e.g., a newspaper account from the 1960's)
or as a joke (e.g., a Henny Youngman recording)?
--Jim Saxe <sa...@src.dec.com>
Charles Lasner
>
>In article <BtK4x...@zorch.SF-Bay.ORG>, ph...@zorch.SF-Bay.ORG
> (Phil Gustafson) answers the Great Question of Life, the Universe, and
>Everything, to wit: Where's the Great net.Peter?
Obviously 42.
He's probably at the Restaurant at the End of the Universe talking to his
next meal that's recommending to him how good the meal will taste when
prepared in various ways.
>
>|>PvdL has chosen to absent himself from a.f.u for the nonce, probably because
>|>the high recycling rate got to him, and partly because he's writing yet
>|>another book.
Sound's like the Peter Principle.
>|>
>|>He did take the time to snipe at hsr4 last week, so there's still hope.
>|>
>|>Phil "How long is a nonce, anyway?" Gustafson
>
>A nonce is just about long enough to reach the ground, if you're headed West
>on cenTral Expressway. otherwise it's about 35 picoseconds.
Years ago, I used APL, so I must have gotten it wrong, because all the time
it would give me "NONCE ERROR" messages.
cjl
Geoff Miller
In article <1992Aug28....@nas.nasa.gov> eug...@wilbur.nas.nasa.gov
(Eugene N. Miya) writes:
>B.F. Skinner also trained pigeons to direct guided bombs. You can read about
>Operation Pigeon in his autobiography (vol. II I am recalling).
The Coast Guard experimented with a more peaceful application back in the
late Seventies. A transparant plastic bowl was fitted to the underside
of a USCG helicopter based at CGAS Barbers Point, near Honolulu. The
chamber was partitioned into three sections, each with a pigeon inside,
plus some kind of mechanism for detecting the movement of each pigeon's
head. The idea was to use the birds to help spot floating objects during
search-and-rescue missions.
Although I was stationed at Barbers Point several years later and learned
of this experiment, I don't recall how successful it was. What I do
remember hearing about is the way the program terminated. The helicopter
used for the test, a single-engine Sikorsky HH-52A, flamed out and had to
autorotate into Kaneohe Bay...
Geoff
-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-
Geoff Miller + + + + + + + + Sun Microsystems
geo...@purplehaze.Corp.Sun.COM + + + + + + + + Menlo Park, California
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Pete Zakel
Dope (meaning marijuana) + alcohol will not kill a person any faster than
alcohol alone. It may make you feel like you want to die, though, as in my
experience if you drink enough to feel sick, smoking pot will intensify the
sick feelings and make it seem like it lasts 4 eternities, instead of just 1.
Note that I rarely drink enough alcohol anymore to feel sick (I learned my
lessons about drinking quite a few years ago) and I currently do not smoke
marijuana (or ingest it in any manner). Should marijuana be legalized (hope,
hope), that last statement will quickly become untrue.
-Pete Zakel
(p...@cadence.com or ..!uunet!cadence!phz)
It's too bad that we can't translate "Bad cop, no donut" to "Bad government,
no taxes" and really get away with it.
Kevin C. Castner
: |> Okay, so let's inject some FACTS (sorry) into this discussion. As far as I
: |> know, the Borough of Manhattan includes (besides Manhattan Island itself)
: |> a few blocks across the Spuyten Duyvil in the Bronx, and possibly the docks
: |> on the Brooklyn side of the East River (I'm not 100% sure about that).
: |>
:
: A good reference for this is a good ol' AAA New York City street map,
: which shows the few blocks in the Bronx which are part of NY County,
: but not the docks in Brooklyn.
:
: Does anybody know the historical reason for those few blocks in the
: Bronx?
I'm not positive, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was eco-politically
movitivated. In the early part of the century there was a shipping dock and
loading station to the Putnam-Division Railroad (the tracks are still there).
in those few blocks.
I worked on a survey crew a few years ago. Some of the buildings are still
there, and the crew chief told me that products would be taken from upstate
(Dutchess County really) by rail and loaded on ship to be taken elsewhere.
============================================================================
Kevin C. Castner kev...@ups.com
============================================================================
Bruce Gustifson
it even though I just saw it with my own eyes!
************************************************************************
"Would you believe it if you | MY KARMA
saw it with your own eyes?" | JUST RAN OVER
Asked the woman | YOUR DOGMA
"That depends" | -Dolly Rosicrution-
Replied I |
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