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katie
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Katie wished:
13. If genetic scientists crossed a chicken with a zebra would
>> they get a four-legged chicken with its own barcode?
Kim
Porch Dreamer
AFGS '99
(remove NOSPAM to reply)
A couple of weeks ago, we actually managed to meet (apart from one member
who said he was moving house that day). So, I would say that yes,
procrastinator's clubs do meet, but very rarely. We did plan another meeting
for this month, but I'll let you know when we DO meet (sometime in the year
2001 if all goes to schedule)
Mousie
> > 6. If procrastinators had a club would they ever have a meeting?
> katie
> --------------------------
>
>
Why do they give you a tape with a VCR to tell you how to use it?
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean
them?
Why do they make cars go so fast its illegal?
Why do they make scented toilet paper?
Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?
Why do they put Braille on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?
Why do they report power outages on TV?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Why do tourists go to the top of tall buildings and then put money in
telescopes so they can see things on the ground in close-up?
Why do we call something sent by car a shipment and something sent by ship a
cargo?
Why do we call them restrooms when no one goes there to rest?
Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
Why do we have hot water heaters when hot water doesn't need to be heated?
Why do we kill people for killing people to show that killing is wrong?
Why do we need training bras? What can we teach them?
Why do we put shirts in a suitcase, and put suits in a garment bag?
Why do we say 'a pair of pants' when there is only one article of clothing
involved?
Why do we say something is out of whack? Can something be in whack?
Why do we sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game," when we are already there?
Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
Why do wise guy and wise man mean entirely different things?
Why do you feet smell and your nose runs?
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and
drive?
Why do you need an appointment to see a psychic?
Why does a dishtowel get wet when it dries?
Why does a grapefruit look nothing like a grape?
Why does it take 15 minutes to cook minute rice?
Why does the department of the interior administer America's parks when they
are outside?
Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why doesn't the fattest man in the world become a hockey goalie?
Why don't they call mustaches mouthbrows?
Why don't they just make food stamps edible?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery?"
Why get even, when you can get odd?
Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?
Why is a boxing ring square?
Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a
racecar not called a racist?
Why is brassiere singular and panties plural?
Why is clear considered a color?
Why is it called a 'building' when it is already built?
Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?
Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why is it that bullets ricochet off of superman's chest, but he ducks when the
gun is thrown at him?
Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice?'
Why is it that famous people are always born on holidays?
Why is it that night falls but day breaks?
Why is it that only adults have difficulty with childproof bottles?
Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
Why is it that so many towns are named after their water towers?
Why is it that to stop Windows 95, you have to click on 'START?'
Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but
when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down
the volume on the radio?
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down
the volume on the radio?
Why is it when a house burns up, we say it burns down.
Why is it you must wait until night to call it a day?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with
real lemons?
Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why is the word dictionary in the dictionary?
Why is there a road sign that says "Braille Institute, Next Exit"?
Why is there always one in every crowd?
Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
Why is your index finger the same size as your nostrils?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up a speech, I end
it?
Will Rogers never met a lawyer.
Wink. I'll do the rest.
Work is for people who don't know how to fish.
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
You can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you'd better
have a lot more to offer.
You can keep puking, long after you think you're finished.
You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
You can't tell which way the train went by looking at the track.
You cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them, and hope they
panic and give in.
You have the right to remain silent, so please shut up.
You know how most packages say 'open here.' What is the protocol if the
package says, 'open somewhere else?'
You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes? Why
can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
You shouldn't compare yourself to others; they are more screwed up than you
think.
You! Off my planet!
Your family won't always be there for you. Of course, if you win the lottery,
the ol' hag, the philanderer, the screw-up, and the missing one will be there
for 'you.'
Your kid may be an honor student but you're still an idiot!
--------------------
On mounting a rising ground, which brought the figure of his fellow traveler in
relief against the sky, gigantic in height, and muffled in a cloak, Ichabod was
horror-struck, on perceiving that he was headless!
--------------------
> > 1. When an agnostic dies, does he go to the "great perhaps"?
Perhaps.
Simon - Porch Snack-Runner and resident klutz
--
katie
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Joney wrote in message <7uu01n$9v7$1...@nntp6.atl.mindspring.net>...