YKYBHTL
John 'Fritz' Lowrey
and the say their phone number is 1-800-FTD-XXXX, and you think, "Wow,
dial-up FTP... an 800 number too!". I need a break!
Fritz
--
"I'll gently raise and softly call, | J. "Fritz" Lowrey
Goodnight my friends, and joy to all."| Internet: jlo...@usc.edu
Clancy Brothers |
Peter Gutmann
"I play Doom inside my head because it's faster than my 386/40 and
runs in 640x480 to boot"
He can at this point play the entire first 4 levels without needing a computer.
Some other interesting Doom incidents:
- The FAQ reached version 2.6 before the program was even released.
- It prompted messages like "I know it hasn't been released yet, but
can someone post the cheats for it?"
- The morning it was released, there were 300 new messages on whatever
games newsgroup it's covered in.
- There were about 20 sites carrying the initial release. Attempts to
connect to some of these sites (which typically had FTP user limits of
100-200) at 4am on the day it was released were unsuccessful due to
overloading.
- Logon notice on one site: "Doom hasn't been uploaded yet".
Pause.
"They could be lying. Check anyway".
Peter.
Michael Covington
all its net packets are broadcast packets (FF:FF:FF:FF) and have to be
looked at by every machine on the entire network.
OK in a small office, but when you play DOOM on a campus-wide net with
thousands of machines, people notice!
--
< Michael A. Covington, Assc Rsch Scientist, Artificial Intelligence Programs >
< The University of Georgia, Athens, GA 30606-7415 USA mcov...@ai.uga.edu >
<>< ----------------------------------------------------------------------- ><>
< For info about U.Ga. degree programs, email GRA...@UGA.CC.UGA.EDU (not me) >
Andrew Bulhak
: The network version of DOOM has been causing problems around here because
: all its net packets are broadcast packets (FF:FF:FF:FF) and have to be
: looked at by every machine on the entire network.
: OK in a small office, but when you play DOOM on a campus-wide net with
: thousands of machines, people notice!
Tell me about it.
Shortly after it was released, I noticed that the Decstation 2100 I log
into was unusually slow for the holidays, but only when telnetting from
PC networks (the good old VT220s didn't have this problem). Immediately
afterwards I noticed that there was an unusual number of
unhackerly-looking types (you could call them "jocks", I suppose) on the
486s; and, judging by the noisy clusters they were in, they weren't
working on resum'es.
On the student-run UNIX box (the 2100), the administration had to a) put
a copy of DOOM in the FTP directory (to keep net.traffic from choking
the rest of the campus), and b) put a line in the motd warning that copies
in home directories will be deleted.
One thing we can all be grateful for is that DOOM cannot be played over
the Internet.
-- acb [IDOTNP! FA0x0A!]
--
Andrew Bulhak a...@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au
STOP CASTING POROSITY.
Ross Smith
DOOM thing you lot keep going on about?
--
... Ross Smith (Wanganui, New Zealand) ... al...@acheron.amigans.gen.nz ...
Booze is the answer. Does anyone remember the question?
Ed McCreary
AB> One thing we can all be grateful for is that DOOM cannot be played over
AB> the Internet.
I think someone is working on a patch.
--
Eddie McCreary e...@twisto.compaq.com
Compuserve 72652,1174
"Question with boldness even the existence of a God, because, if there be
one, he must more approve of the homage of reason than that of blindfolded
fear."
Thomas Jefferson
David DeLaney
>I just know I'm going to regret asking this ... but what's this
>DOOM thing you lot keep going on about?
well, speaking from *no* firsthand knowledge: it's a game. A multi-user
computer game that just recently came out (and was widely hyped beforehand,
causing posts like "I *know* it's not released yet, but do you have the
solution for XXXX level?"). It's got a "chain gun"
(BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP!!!!) and a "God mode" in it somewhere, and is
even more efficient than Tetris at tying up computer time (because all its
communications [?] packets are *broadcast* over the whole network). Completely
took over the .games newsgroup it fits into for a time.
Dave "all I know and all I need to know" DeLaney
--
David DeLaney: dbd@(utkux.utcc | panacea.phys | enigma.phys).utk.edu - collect
them all! Disclaimer: AFAIK, *nobody* speaks for U.T.Knoxville (consistently);
Thinking about this disclaimer (or about high energy theoretical particle __
physics) may cause headaches. .sig virus: Vicki Robinson v2.29; Kibo #: -0 \/
David K. Bryant
[ your message deleted ]
>--
>Andrew Bulhak a...@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au
>STOP CASTING POROSITY.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
You know, I have seen that sign on Interstate 880 in
San Leandro CA for over 30 years. Is it in Australia too??
Michael D. Maxfield
alt.folklore.computers
dbr...@netcom.com (David K. Bryant) writes:
>a...@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au (Andrew Bulhak) writes:
>
>>--
>>Andrew Bulhak a...@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au
>>STOP CASTING POROSITY.
> ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>You know, I have seen that sign on Interstate 880 in
>San Leandro CA for over 30 years. Is it in Australia too??
He probably got it from Kibo's sig.
The long one... not the Readers Digest version.
James Kibo Parry
What long one? I haven't posted the long one yet!
-- K.
HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A 3-D RAY-TRACED 50-BIT .SIG? YOU WILL!
--
A REALLY NEAT .SIGNATURE FOLLOWS, PRESS "NO" IF YOU DONT WANT TO SEE IT !!!111
^ L
.SIGNATURE UNDER CONSTRUCTION....... LAST REVISED 5/12/1990 11:02:32 PM
AND ALSO LAST REVISED 5/22/90 11:27:59 PM
AND 8/22/1990 10:03:16 PM TOO
AND 8/25/90 01:57:08 PM
AND 11/11/90 12:35:53 AM <-- LAST TIME!!
(WOW, FOUR 1'S IN A ROW!!!!)
AND 7/8/91 2:06:03 AM <-- LATE NIGHT!!
AND 9/6/91 2:51:26AM <--- LATER!!!
AND 2/9/91^H^H92 4:25:43AM <--- WOW!!!!
AND 7/8/92 1:58:59AM <-- CALL IT 2!!!
AND 7/31/92 1:27:49AM <-- JUST FOR ONE NEW LINE!!!!
NOT COUNTING THE ABOVE ONE OF COURSE!!!!!!!!
AND 12:58:53 9/11/92 FOR ONE MORE!!! NOW IT'S DONE!!!!
AND 9/25/92 1:24:33AM <-- AGAIN!!!
AND 9.29.92 2L37L48AM
AND 10/6/92 3:18:31AM <-- LATE BEDTIME HUH !!!!
AND 3/8/93 2:23:38AM <--- LAST TIME REALLY!!!!!
COPYRIGHT (C) COPYR.1988,1990,1989,1992
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
TODOS LOS DERECHOS RESERVADOS!!!
THIS POSTING MAY NOT BE REPORDUCED IN ANY
FORM WITHOUT MY WRITTEN PERMISSION
OR SOLD FOR MONETARY FINANCIAL PROFIT.
AND 6/13/92 3:45:26PM <-- FRI THE 13TH !!!
I WROTE IT ALL BY MYSELF BUT THANKS TO MARK AND JASON DOMINUS, AND TO MATHEW
WHOSE LAST NAME I FORGOT!!! AND ALL THOSE AUSSIES NAMED "IAIN"!!!
I DIDN'T MAKE ANY SPELLING ERRERS SO
YOU CAN'T POST THIS SIGNATURE TO
ALT.FAN.WARLORD!!!!!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
^L
THIS IS YOUR BRAIN.
___
/(()\
\__\|
THIS IS YOUR BRAIN ON THE INTERNET.
___ +-----+
/(()\ | VAX |
\__\|===+_____+
^L
____
/ \__
|\ / @ \
\ \_______| \ .:|> "Dogs aren't ALLOWED? WAAAAAAH!"
\ ##| | \__/
| ####\__/ \ -- Spot
/ / ## \|
/ /__________\ \
L_JJ \__JJ
S C R A T C H A N D S N I F F
to enjoy the aromatic aroma of beautiful downtown schenectady !!!!
_____________________________________________________________________________
james "kibo" parry, 151 tremont st #8u, boston ma 02111 <- not schenectady.
ki...@world.std.COM _________________________________________________
ki...@world.COM@uunet.COM / Kibology / Anything I say is my opinion,
ki...@world.BITNET@bitnet.COM is better! / and is the opposite of Xibo's.
__________________________/_____________/_____________________________________
"All colors are arbitrary." --Carl Sagan / Bozos use anything but emacs!
__________________________________________/___________________________________
Wacky, wild, Kibo style! / You're allowed. (Unless you don't want to be...
________________________/_ you are also allowed to not be allowed.) _________
I never said I wasn't a bozo. /____________________________________/_Hi mom!_
_____________________________/ Life is silly but should be taken seriously.
Some days you / Klods * / TV is evil and should be destroyed. Really.
just can't get / for /__________________________________________________
rid of a bomb. / klods / Moisten needle before inserting Taiwan. / 298R
______________/_________/__________________________________________/_________
* Note: "Klods for Klods" is the motto of Lego(tm) blocks in Lego's native
Denmark, where they speak Danish. It means "Block by block". Neat, huh????
_____________________________________________________________________________
You're reading my .signature file. / COMMODORE 64S RULE THE WORLD !!!!!!!!!
___________________________________/_________________________________________
"I'm Bozo, the world's most famous clown!" -- the world's most famous clown
_____________________________________________________________________________
I've read all of Kurt Vonnegut Junior's books and my favorite is "Breakfast
Of Champions", my second favorite is "Chariots Of The Gods". I love them all.
My other favorite author is Philip K. Dick who wrote "Do Androids Dream Of
Sheep?", "Clams Of The Alphane Moon", "OBIK", "Man In The Castle", and "Total
Recall"! Oh, and Stephen King is absolutely the best too! And Derrida!
_____________________________________________________________________________
If it doesn't say PURINA, / / Bart Simpson and Charlie
bury it in the yard! / BYTE ME! / Brown are both GIRLS!
________________________/_____________________/______________________________
THIS ENTIRE MESSAGE IS COPYRIGHTED (C)1989/90 MCMLXXXIX/MCMLXL BY JAMES "KIBO"
PARRY AND MAY NOT BE REPRODUCED, SOLD, READ, PRINTED, OR REPLIED TO WITHOUT
MY EXPRESS WRITTEN PERMISSION. HE IS SERIOUS AND WILL SUE YOUR PANTS OFF.
_____________________________________________________________________________D
|| _______________________________________________________________________ ||I
|| || || ||S
|| ||------> I'M NOT BIFF !!!!!! HE'S NOT ME !!!!!!! <------|| ||C
++-++-------------------------------------------------------------------++-+|L
|| ||------> BIFF IS TOO OBNOXIOUS TO BE ME !!!!!!!! <------|| ||A
|| ||------> ALSO HIS .SIGNATURE IS LONGER !!!!!!!!! <------|| ||I
|| ||___________________________________________________________________|| ||M
||_________________________________________________________________________||E
_____________________________________________________________________________R
"BOZE NOSE BOOKS!" -- Bozo, The World's Most Famous Clown / QUAIL SUCKS
__________________________________________________________/__________________
/
Orwell was an optimist. / "There is infinite hope, but not for us." - Kafka
________________________/____________________________________________________
Join the Kibo Fan Club! Send lots of money to the address above, RIGHT NOW!
_____________________________________________________________________________
All generalizations stink. / Kibology is *NOT* Satanism! / Ollie for prez
___________________________/_______________________________/_________________
DON'T WORRY, BE HAPPY! / What's fahefergnugen? / QUAIL STILL SUCKS! ! !
_______________________/__________________________/__________________________
"The secret word is... SIL! Now you all know what to do whenever anybody
says the secret word, right? SCREAM REAL LOUD!" -- Pee Wee Herman
_____________________________________________________________________________
If I said anything to offend anyone in this message, I'm sorry and didn't
mean to hurt your feelings. ________________________________________________
____________________________/ "Losing our marbles for the last 23 years"
I hope you're enjoying / I'm gonna be 24 soon! My birthday is July 13,
reading this posting... / send presents! The day before Bastille Day!
_________________________/___________________________________________________
If Lambada is the forbidden dance, why did they make a movie about it?
_____________________________________________________________________________
Hi Ta...@Rpi.Edu! / You are here X / What's Peewee Herman's favorite
_________________/___________________/ baseball team? THE EXPOS!
Garrison Keillor is my hero / (rec.humor.funny)
___________________________________/_________________________________________
"Beam me up Scotty, there's no intelligent life down here!" -- STAR TREK
_____________________________________________________________________________
"SIL!" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
_____________________________________________________________________________
There's a mouse in my apartment right now while I'm typing this. Isn't
that an incredible coincidence! Have you ever been using this bboard while
a mouse was in your room. Now I have.........?
_____________________________________________________________________________
Anyone who thinks anyone else should be shot should be shot; the NRA is a
bunch of bozos just like the Democrats AND Republicans AND Williard Scott.
Kill the Fascists and Communists and all the other nuts too. Kill 'em all!
_____________________________________________________________________________
"I'm Batman!" -- BATMAN THE MOVIE / This space intentionally left blank.
(THE BEST MOVIE IN THE WORLD!!!!) /
__________________________________/__________________________________________
Elvis lives. / "I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay..." --MONTY PYTHON / Hug me
_____________/_____________________________________________________/_________
Did I spell anything wrong? If so, please tell me so I can post a correction.
_____________________________________________________________________________
|\ My favorite PostScript font is Chicago! Times Roman is just a cheap
--- \ ripoff of the real New York. And you don't even have to be in Chicago
___ / to use Chicago! I printed my whole resume in 36pt Chicago Bold Shadow!
__|/_________________________________________________________________________
| "Beauty and the Beast" may be cancelled, but it lives on forever in our |
| hearts and minds and hearts! It will live forever even though it's dead!|
|___________________________________________________________________________|
Can I have a cookie? / The Kibology Center is a non-non-profit arm of the
_____________________/ National Association for Kibological Awareness(NAKA).
I'M 100% FLAMEPROOF /________________________________________________________
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
Harry Graber, age 11, is dying of a fatal disease which will eventually kill
him. Before he dies, he would like to be in the "Guinness" Book of "Records"
for receiving the most postcards in the mail. Please send him lots of
postcards at the below address:
Kibo, PO Box 722, Boston MA 02116-0722 (USA)
Although he is very ill and only barely clinging to life, he gets thousands
of postcards a day from people like you. He writes back, personally, to
each and every single one. Amazingly, everyone who writes to Harry recieves
a year of good luck afterwards! Mrs. Bertha Briggs of Poughkeepsie, NY
recently wrote to Harry and then won the lottery the very next day--AND her
dog was cured of cancer! Plus, if you write now, Harry will send you
his miracle POSTCARD DIET which will allow you to lose 100 pounds a week!
THIS IS NOT A SCAM!
This service is FREE!
Please enclose $14.95 for postage and handling.
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
HANDY "TWIN PEEKS" CHART [murder]<-->[LAURA]<--/-->[Bob]<--["Bob"]
| ^ | ^
This is fun to read even if you haven't v v v |
seen the series. I like my chart, and [David [That FBI guy] ["J.R."]
I've never seen the show! Lynch] ^ ^
/ | |
v [donuts] [Bobby in
[the log lady]<->[flouridation]-->["Eraserheads"] = the shower]
^ ^ [sex] |
| | /->[Monty Python's Flying Circles] v
[bag [lumber- /->[Ted Bundy]
ladies] jacks]<--["RoboJox"]<->[VW]<->[FOX]-->[Al&Peg Bundy]
^ | ^ \->[Children]
| v |
[the dog-faced boy]-->[Laura's<-/->[the Simpsons]<--[Life in Hell]<--[UseNet]
evil twin] |
v
And remember, the name of the show is a breast metaphor. [alt.tv.twin.peeks]
^ ^ | ^
/ | v |
[Mike Douglas]=[Douglas firs]-->[breasts] [drumsticks] [rmgroups] /->[logs]
| \______________________________________/ ^
v |
[Albert]<--/-->[furry white rats]-->[green rats]-->[traffic [the log lady]
^ lights] (here too!)
| [walk with fire me]---> ^ ^
[Layland]<-->[Pinky Lee] | |
| [Herve Villachaise]<--[tattoos] ["Bob"]
[Dilbert]-->[Dogbert] | |
\ v v
>[neckties]->[sexual arousal]<------>[e-meters]<-------[L. Ron Howard]
_____________________________________________________________________________
My favroite sci-fi/fantasy short story is / VOTE NIXON / The SubGenius
"The Eye of Argon" by L. Ron Hubbard! / IN 1992 / must wear slacks!
_________________________________________/______________/____________________
Best Skeleton Joke Ever: "What do you call fish bones?" "Skele-tuna!" :-)
_____________________________________________________________________________
I spell things the way I want, since William Safire is too wimpy to stop me!
_____________________________________________________________________________
"The medium is the message!" -- Marshall Mike Luhan / I'm a lumberjack...
_____________________________________________________/_______________________
I know the Green Golfball Joke! I'd post it here but BitNet doesn't allow
R-rated jokes to be posted here so I won't post it! That's a violation of
your unconstitutional rights and you should complain to your sysop!
_____________________________________________________________________________
MY TETRIS HIGH SCORE ON MY NINTENDO IS 999,990 -- THAT'S A WORLD RECORD!
I HAVE PHOTOS OF THE TV SCREEN TO PROVE IT! THEY DIDN'T COME OUT THOUGH.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
\\\\\\\\\\
\\\\\\\\\\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\
\\\\\\\\\\ \\/ \\/ \\/ \\/ \\/
\\\\\\\\\\
\\\\\\\\\\ AMIGA ONLY! \\ \\ \\ \\ \\ \\
\\\\\\\\\\ \\/ \\/ \\/ \\/ \\/ \\/
\\\\\\\\\\ ___
\\\\\\\\\\ /. .\
\\\\\\\\\\ |\_/|
\\\\\\\\\\ \___/
\\\\\\\\\\ /####\ /######\ ### /##### /######\
\\\\\\\\\\ ## ## ## ## ## ### ## ## ##
\\\\\\\\\\ ## ## ## ## ## ### ## ### ## ##
\\\\\\\\\\ ////////###### ## ## ## ### ## ### ########
\\\\\\\\\\ //////// ## ## ## ## ## ### \##### ## ##
\\\\\\\\\\ ////////
\\\\\\\\\\ //////// /##### ### ### #####\ ### ###
\\\\\\\\\//////// ## ## ## ## ## ## ## GRAFIX
\\\\\\\//////// ## ### ## ## ######\ ## ##
\\\\\//////// ## ## ## ## ## ## ## ## WIZARD
\\\//////// \##### \#######/ ## ## \#####/
_____________________________________________________________________________
_______________ | __ _ ____
/ \ |\/\/\/| r | |\\ | | \ / ,__\ AIR SUPPLY
| "Have a cow, |__ | @ @ | a | ||\\ | |_/ \ | _ _ |
| man!" / | ' | d | || \\ | | \ \\ | | |\ |\ | \ /
\_______________/ | \___/ i | ||__\\ \ \\ | | |/ |/ | |
| | c d | ||___\\ \ \\ \_/ | | |__ |
a u | || \\ \\__// | | |
as seen on BART l d | \__/
FOX! SIMPSON e | THE MOST AWESOME HEAVY METAL BAND !!!
_____________________________________|_______________________________________
^L
^L
# # #### # # # ##### ######
# # # ,, # # # # # # #
# # # # # # # # # #####
# #\__/# # # ##### #
# # # # # # # #
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## # # #### # # ###### #### ##
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# # # # # # # # ##### # # ##
###### # # #\__/# # ## # # # # ##
# # # # # # ## ## # # #
# # ###### ###### #### # # ###### #### ##
HAVE A NICE DAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
PLEASE POST YOUR REPLIES TO THIS BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHAT MY NET ADDRESS IS!
ALSO PLEASE CROSS-POST TO LOTS OF GROUPS SINCE IT MIGHT NOT BE A GROUP I READ!
[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]
This blank region of empty space is a hollow void that adds lines to the
length of this .signature's physical size.
[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]---[]
***** ___ ___ _________
* / \ / \ | _______ |
* | V | | | * * | | HELP ME NAME MY
* \ / | |_____| | APPLE SE/30 WITH
* \ / | === | 40MB MEGABYTE DRIVE
* \ / |_________|
***** v |||||||||
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
:-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) <--- Aren't these cute?
:-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) <--- I was the one who
:-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) <--- invented them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
|\
---*-- | \
-""" \__| \
/ : Qld : TAS \
/ :........ \
' SA : AA :.......*| x = Schenectady NY USA
\ : * :NSW /
\* :/""""""\`..x */
----' VIC\ *`./
""""
\"""/
NT\*/
Dan Quayle is Howdy Doody! (And Susan Sontag is the Bride of Frankenstein!)
+---------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| S T O P C A S T I N G P O R O S I T Y |
+____________________________________________________________________________+
I've been to Cheers(TM) in downtown Boston and I have a T-Shirt that says
Cheers(TM) and the official Cheers(TM) Plastic Souvenir Shopping Bag!
Hey, is Ted Danson really as bald as they say? He couldn't be, his hair's
fluffy, and wigs can't be fluffy! William Shatner wears a toupee though,
I bet you didn't know that! I hope I never go bald. I'd lose my sex appeal.
_____________________________________________________________________________
Fats Loves Madelyn. / Honk if you hate bumper stickers that say "Honk if ..."
___________________/_________________________________________________________
"We're like gerbils. We're in a cage running around and around."
-- Tom Brokaw
_____________________________________________________________________________
"OH WHAT A ZINGER!!!" -- CHRIS ELIOT / "Married With Children" is the best
GET A LIFE / TV show ever! Ted is the greatest!
_____________________________________/_______________________________________
Fly KLM! / Did you hear that PeeWee Herman was arrested for masterbating?
__________/____ Really!______________________________________________________
Dana Hersey is Willie Whistle in addition to hosting The Movie Loft (channel 6)
_____________________________________________________________________________
Read alt.exploding.kibo, the group about exploding kibo! / NO FATE
________________________________________________________/
I put microwave coffee in the Tater Twister and almost / KNOW FUTURE
went back in time! -- Steven Wright (Emerson alumnus)/
_____________________________________________________/ NO DOGS ALLOWED
"NOT!" -- WAYNE'S WORLD / "The Stevemeisterooski!" /
________________________/__________________________/_________POOR SPOT______
"If I had MY OWN NETWORK, it would be on ALL the TIME. It would be EDUCATIONAL,
like COSMOS and NOVA, but not so DRY. It would best be seen on HIGH-definition
TELEVISION. And every DAY we'd READ from the BOOK of CHER, because when you
READ from the BOOK of CHER, it doesn't MATTER if you UNDERSTAND... it's the ACT
that MATTERS. MY network would be METAphysical, paraNORMAL, and EXTRAORDINARILY
ORDINARY. It would COMPEL you to RELAX and read `MADAME BOVARY', LOOK into the
MOUTHS of VOLCANOES and LEARN to make RISOTTO... It would have a LINEAR BUILD
and ARISTOTELIAN LINES... MY network would be both JARRING and AVANT-GARDE...
with just a TOUCH of BRIAN DENNEHY. MY network would not promote WAR, WASTE,
DOUBT or ANXIETY, and would pose the question... What was MICHELLE PFEIFFER
doing in `Grease 2'?" -- Sean E. Coates, the "E!" poster child
**************************(.signature continued)*******************************
HOW MANY POSTS A DAY I MADE LAST WEEK
***************************************************************************
* *
* *
* *
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** W*T T*W*T T*WT **
* W*T*F M*T* *F * F M* *F M *
* T* * * * * * * * * *
* * * * * M * * * * *
* * * * * * * * * * *
* * * * * * * * * * *
** * * * * * * * * * **
* M S*S SS S*S S*S *
* * *
* S *
* ^Labor Day ^Sep 14 ^Sep 28 *
* *
* * * * *
240 -x- 280 0 -y- 15000***************************************************
*******************************************************************************
MY TEN FAVORITE QUOTES: Broad-mindedness, n.: The result of flattening high-
mindedness out. There is a certain impertinence in allowing oneself to be
burned for an opinion. All the good ones are taken. "Microwave oven? Whaddya
mean, it's a microwave oven? I've been watching Channel 4 on the thing for two
weeks." Murphy was an optimist. Love means having to say you're sorry every
five minutes. No matter how great your triumphs or how tragic your defeats --
approximately one billion Chinese couldn't care less. Get forgiveness now --
tomorrow you may no longer feel guilty. Commitment can be illustrated by a
breakfast of ham and eggs. The chicken was involved, the pig was committed.
You are here ------> * But you're not all there. Kirkland, Illinois, law
forbids bees to fly over the village or through any of its streets. Love and
scandal are the best sweeteners of tea. A clairvoyant is a person, commonly a
woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron --
namely, that he is a blockhead. A multi-day event on public television, used
to raise money so you won't have to watch commercials. Try to get all of
your posthumous medals in advance. The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the
needs of an expanding bureaucracy. The intelligence of any discussion
diminishes with the square of the number of participants. The hearing ear is
always found close to the speaking tongue, a custom whereof the memory of man
runneth not howsomever to the contrary, nohow. Good advice is something a
man gives when he is too old to set a bad example. -- La Rouchefoucauld
Professor Gorden Newell threw another shutout in last week's Chem. Eng. 130
midterm. Once again no student received a single point on his exam. Newell
has now tossed 5 shutouts this quarter. Newell's earned exam average has now
dropped to a phenomenal 30%"Consequences, Schmonsequences, as long as I'm
rich." -- "Ali Baba Bunny" [1957, Chuck Jones] Marriage is the only adventure
open to the cowardly. -- Voltaire The First Rule of Program Optimization:
Don't do it. The Second Rule of Program Optimization (for experts only!):
Don't do it yet. -- Michael Jackson Goldenstern's Rules: (1) Always hire a
rich attorney (2) Never buy from a rich salesman. The problem ... is that we
have run out of dinosaurs to form oil with. Scientists working for the
Department of Energy have tried to form oil using other animals; they've
piled thousands of tons of sand and Middle Eastern countries on top of cows,
raccoons, haddock, laboratory rats, etc., but so far all they have managed to
do is run up an enormous bulldozer-rental bill and anger a lot of Middle
Eastern persons. None of the animals turned into oil, although most of the
laboratory rats developed cancer. -- Dave Barry, "Postpetroleum Guzzler" If
a 6600 used paper tape instead of core memory, it would use up tape at about
30 miles/second. -- Grishman, Assembly Language Programming Peanut Blossoms 4
cups sugar 16 tbsp. milk 4 cups brown sugar 4 tsp. vanilla 4 cups
shortening 14 cups flour 8 eggs 4 tsp. soda 4 cups peanut butter 4 tsp.
salt Shape dough into balls. Roll in sugar and bake on ungreased cookie
sheet at 375 F. for 10-12 minutes. Immediately top each cookie with a
Hershey's kiss or star pressing down firmly to crack cookie. Makes a hell of
a lot. Gyroscope, n.: A wheel or disk mounted to spin rapidly about an axis
and also free to rotate about one or both of two axes perpendicular to each
other and the axis of spin so that a rotation of one of the two mutually
perpendicular axes results from application of torque to the other when the
wheel is spinning and so that the entire apparatus offers considerable
opposition depending on the angular momentum to any torque that would change
the direction of the axis of spin. -- Webster's Seventh New Collegiate
Dictionary. In fifteen minutes, everyone will be famous. -- Andy Warhol
_______________________________________________________________________________
.--------------.
.---' o . `---.
.-' . O . . `-.
.-' @@@@@@ . `-.
.'@@ @@@@@@@@@@@ @@@@@@@ . `.
.'@@@ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@ @@@@@@@@@ `.
/@@@ o @@@@@@@@@@@@@@ @@@@@@@@@ O \
/ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@ @ @@@@@@@@@ @@ . \
/@ o @@@@@@@@@@@ . @@ @@@@@@@@@@@ @@ \
/@@@ . @@@@@@ o @ @@@@@@@@@@@@@ o @@@@ \
/@@@@@ @ . @@@@@@@@@@@@@@ @@@@@ \
|@@@@@ O `.-./ . . @@@@@@@@@@@@@ @@@ |
/ @@@@@ --`-' o @@@@@@@@@@@ @@@ . \ Full Moon +
|@ @@@@ . @ @ ` @ @@ . @@@@@@ | 0 5:15:36
| @@ o @@ . @@@@@@ | Last Quarter -
| . @ @ @ o @@ o @@@@@@. | 7 3:55:27
\ @ @ @ .-. @@@@ @@@ /
| @ @ @ `-' . @@@@ . . |
\ . o @ @@@@ . @@ . . /
\ @@@ @@@@@@ . o /
\ @@@@@ @@\@@ / O . /
\ o @@@ \ \ / __ . . .--. /
\ . . \.-.--- `--' /
`. `-' . .'
`. o / | ` O . .'
`-. / | o .-'
`-. . . .-'
`---. . .---'
`--------------'
I AM NOT A BOZO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
^L
____|||||///
/ |||||//// TERMINATOR TWO: BEST MOVIE IN THE WORLD !!!!!11
/ __ || ////
| L| : === "Hasta la vista, baby!" -- ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER
| | __ : ___ =|= (a personal friend)
| (_) :/__) |
|/ | \| <--- THE TERMINATOR
| .\ |
\ \ \ : / I HOPE TERMINATOR THREE DOESN'T SUCK DEAD BUNNIES
| HHH--- | THRU A STRAW LIKE BATMAN TWO !!!!!11
\____:___/
"THERE IS NO BATHROOM" -- MY PAL ARNOLD, KINDERGARTEN COP
"HELP HELP! STAPLER MISFIRE!" -- DILBERT
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;;;;::::;::::::::::::::
My son Herbie, age 7, needs a computer for school and I can't afford
one, would anyone like to give us one? It would be a tax deduction for
you! Herbie wants a Mac IIfx with a Color PostScript printer. He needs
this by next week! All the other kids in his class have them already!!!
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\//\/\/\
\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
STAR TREK RULEZ!!! ________^_______ ============= - - - - - - - - -
\______ _____/\ / / - - - - - - -
Write-in to Paramount V \ \_____/__/_ - - - - WHOOSH! - - -
to keep them from killing Spock )|US ENTERPRISE/ - - - - - - -
in their next movie!!!! |____________/ - - - - - - - - - -
TOP TEN STAR TREK QUOTES 10) "I'm a doctor, not a mechanic."
9) "Dammit Jim!" 8) "Spit it out, man!"
7) "I kinna do it Captain, I have not th' power!"
6) "Where's the beef?" 5) "They're BORN pregnant!"
4) "His BRAIN is missing!" "Oh... you noticed."
** send mail if you want the rest **
Majel Barett was only on STAR TREK because she was married to William Shatner.
The new STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION new series that they're making
now is too full of Yuppie bozos. And the special effects are too good.
SHATNER COULDN'T DIRECT HIS WAY OUT OF THE BATHROOM WITH BOTH HANDS AND A MAP!
------------------------------------=-----------------------------------------
I have discovered a truly wonderful proof of Fermat's Last Theorem, but
unfortunately this .signature is too small to contain it.
-----------------------------------=----------------------------------------------
There exist no legitimate audio tapes of me admitting to being
an alien, a government agent, a sexual pervert, or the
camp-follower of little grey men from Zeta Reticuli.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/
I watch Nick at Nite all day! Xibo watches stupid soap operas!
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/
MY .SIGNATURE IS MORE POSTMODERN THAN YOURS! (It's even autographed by
William S. Burroughs. See--->?) /
\/\/. \. Burroughs
/
I wish he hadn't stopped writing those Tarzan books though!!!!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I have an out-of-date copy of each of the following MTS manuals: Vol. 1, 2,
5, 7, 11, 14, 15, 16, and 24. If you want a copy, I'm selling 'em, $1 each.
I also have lots of plastic bags for five cents each!
/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\
_________
/ \
| |
\__\ /__/
--| |--
-| |-
/| |\
/////\\\\\\
NUKE THE DAMN BUNNY ALREADY!!!!
| _
\ /
UU __
==/ \
/\__o |
*|__\__/
/_ \_ "boomp boomp boomp boomp boomp..." "BOOM!!!!!!!"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
***** ***** ***** **************** ******************
***** ***** ***** ***************** ********************
***** ***** ***** ****************** **********************
***** ***** ***** ***** ****** ****** ******
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** My *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** name *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** is *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** short *****
*************** ***** *************** ***** 'cause *****
**************** ***** **************** ***** it's *****
***************** ***** ***************** ***** only *****
***** ****** ***** ***** ****** ***** four *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** letters! *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
***** ***** ***** ***** ****** ****** ******
***** ***** ***** ****************** **********************
***** ***** ***** ***************** ********************
***** ***** ***** **************** ******************
AND THIS IS THE PART OF THE .SIG THAT BROKE MIKE JITTLOV'S AMIGA!!!
V guvax guvf dhbgr ol Qnir Oneel, zl snibevgr jevgre, rkcynvaf jul V
bsgra jrne zl haqrejrne ba zl urnq jura V tb gb jbex:
Nyy lbh unir gb qb gb frr gur npphenpl bs zl gurfvf vf ybbx nebhaq
lbh. Ybbx, va cnegvphyne, ng gur crbcyr jub, yvxr lbh, ner znxvat
nirentr vapbzrf sbe qbvat nirentr wbof -- onax ivpr cerfvqragf,
vafhenapr fnyrfzna, nhqvgbef, frpergnevrf bs qrsrafr -- naq lbh'yy
ernyvmr gurl nyy qerff gur fnzr jnl, rffragvnyyl gur jnl gur znaardhvaf
va gur Frnef zrafjrne qrcnegzrag qerff. Abj ybbx ng gur erny
fhpprffrf, gur crbcyr jub znxr n ybg zber zbarl guna lbh -- Rygba Wbua,
Pncgnva Xnatnebb, nalobql sebz Fnhqv Nenovn, Ovt Oveq, naq fb ba. Gurl
nyy qerff shaal -- naq gurl nyy fhpprrq. Ner lbh pngpuvat ba?
-- Qnir Oneel, "Ubj gb Qerff sbe Erny Fhpprff"
TO DECODE THE FUNNIST JOKE IN THE UNIVERSE JUST PIPE THAT THROUGH "UUDECODE(1)"
_____________________________________________________________________________
R-RATED GIF FOLLOWS, PRESS N NOW!
^L
O
(.|.)
).( TIFFANY BRISSETE HAS A GREAT BOD! WOO WOO!!!! HUBBA HUBBA! YOW!
( | )
\|/
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
fee fi fo feh. fee fi fo feh. fee fi fo feh. fee fi fo feh. fee fi fo feh.
_____________________________________________________________________________
"100% gist-free!" -- Amy S. Brockman on Kibo's .signature.
Compliment... or CONSPIRACY?
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
My favorite painters are Pollock, Rothko, Warhol, Dali', Miro', Tanguy,
Rockwell, Warhol, and myself. I'm almost as good as Dali' !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My least favorite musical composer is Salieri, since he was a bozo.
____________________
/ \
/ \
^______________/ __ __ \______________^
\ | / \ / \ | /
\ | | o | | o | | /
\ | \__/__ \__/ | /
\ | / \ | /
\ | \__/ | /
BO- \____| __________ |____/ -ZO
| / ________ \ |
\ | / ______ \ | /
\ |/_/ \_\| /
\____________________/
|
|
\ | /
\----+-----/
|
|
|
/\
/ \
/ \
_____________/ \____________ (clown shoes)
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Ich bin ein .signature Virus. Mach' mit und kopiere mich in Deine .signature.
Don't ask what it means, just put it in your .signature, okay?
_____________________________________________________________________________
THE OPINIONS EXPRESSED IN THIS POSTING ARE SOLELY THE AUTHORS' AND DO NOT
NECESSARILY REFLECT THOSE OF DIGITAL EQUIPMENT CORPORATION, RENSSELAER POLY-
POLYTECHNIC INSTITUTE, PENN STATE, IBM, NASA, HARVARD UNIVERSITY, SCIENTOLOGY,
ATARI CORP., STANFORD UNIVERSITY, BITNET INC., SOFTWARE TOOL & DIE, INFOCOM,
PRODIGY, RALSTON PURINA INC., JAPAN, LYNDON LaROUCHE, THE SYSOP OF USENET,
GEORGE BUSH, THE LONDON TIMES, ORACLE CORPORATION, WILLIE WHISTLE, STAR TREK
THE NEXT GENERATION, THE HOME SHOPPING CLUB, THE HAIR CHANNEL FOR MEN, OR THE
CITY OF NEW YORK. HOWEVER YOU CAN'T SUE ME FOR SAYING ANY OF THIS BECAUSE
IF YOU SUE ME YOU'D HAVE TO QUOTE ME IN COURT AND THEN I'D SUE YOU FOR
QUOTING THIS COPYRIGHTED (C) MESSAGE!!! MY COUSINS ARE ALL LAWYERS !!!!!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
******************************************************************************
* NEW drawing! *
* of a RADIK00L sword thats even BIGGER then the USS ENTERPRISE wow! *
* *
* ___ *
* /\/ / ====@==== ///////// ---------
* / _/ ``________// *
* / / `------' -------------
* / / *
* __===__ / / *
*/ \/----+---------------------------------------\______ *
*| | XCALIBER THE DECAPITATER!!!! \______________*
*| | /~~~~~~~~ *
*\__====_/\---+----------------------------------------/~~~~~~ *
* \ \ *
* \ \ *
* \ \ *
* \ \_ *
* \ \ NOTE: This isnt a hyperdermic needel !!!!!! *
* \ \ *
* \/\_\ *
* ITS SO GOOD I FRAMED IT !!!!*
******************************************************************************
aibophobia (ay' bo fo beeya): n. The fear of palindromes.
kibophobia (ki' bo fo beeya): n. The fear of Kibo.
kibophobik (ki' bo fo bik): n. The fear of Kibo's palindromes.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'M STILL 100% FLAMEPROOF! / I'VE FALLEN AND I CAN'T GET UP! / HI MARK!
____________________________/____________________________________/___________
Arsenio Hall is the black Johnny Carson but Byron Allen is the black Pat Sajak!
But at least Byron Allen is funnier than Skip Stephenson or John Barbour!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
IBM's "AIX" operating system is better than "real" "UNIX" systems
because "AIX" has "man" pages that show "pictures" of each "command"!
Here's an "example", isn't this "cute"?
RM, DELETE(1,C) AIX Commands Reference RM, DELETE(1,C)
PURPOSE
Removes files or directories.
SYNTAX
one of
+--------+ +------------+
| rm |---| +----+ |--- file ---|
| delete | +---| -f |---+ ^ |
+--------+ ^ | -i | | +--------+
| | -r | |
| | -- | |
| | -s | |
| +----+ |
+--------+
____________________________________________________ \o clip and save _______
/O
<--those are scissors
.------------
.--' o . . `--
.-' . O . . `
.-'@ @@@@@@@ . @@@@@
/@@@ @@@@@@@@@@@ @@@@@@@ .<--- Crater Parry -- I paid $15 for it!
./ o @@@@@@@@@@@ @@@@@@@
/@@ o @@@@@@@@@@@. @@@@@@@ O
/@@@@ . @@@@@@@o @@@@@@@@@@ @
|@@@@@ . @@@@@@@@@@@@@ o @@
/@@@@@ O `.-./ . @@@@@@@@@@@@ @ Full Moon +
| @@@@ --`-' o @@@@@@@@ @@@@ 2 17:08:58
|@ @@@ ` o . @@ . @@@@@@ Last Quarter -
| @@ @ .-. @@@ @@@@@@ 4 16:02:05
\ . @ @@@ `-' . @@@@ @@@@
| @@ @@@@@ . @@ .
\ @@@@ @\@@ / . O . o
\ o @@ \ \ / . .
`\ . .\.-.___ . . .-
\ `-' `-
`-. o / | o O .
`-. / . . .
`--. . .--
`------------
If this posting offends you, then you're a WEENERBRAIN!!!
@@@@@@ @@ @@ @@@@@@ @@@@@@ @@ @@ @@@@@
@@ @@ @@ @@ @@ @@@ @@ @@ @@
@@ @@@@@@ @@@@@ @@@@@ @@@@@@ @@ @@
@@ @@ @@ @@ @@ @@ @@@ @@ @@
@@ @@ @@ @@@@@@ @@@@@@ @@ @@ @@@@@
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
Dedicated to Gene Roddenberry, who died last year...
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
-------\__/
| * /
|_____-/ BOSTON, MASSACHUSSETTS <-- SITE OF WORLD.COM PUBLIC ACCESS UNIX
ONLY A DOLLAR A MINUTE PLUS CONNECT TIME!
AND NO I DON'T KNOW MICHAEL DUKAKIS PERSONALLY!
^L
12345678901234567890123456789012345678901234567890123456789012345678901234567890XXXXX DON'T GO INTO THE X'S !!!!!
^L
^L
^L
^D
^D
^D
.
exit
stop
bye
^C
^Z
!sh
!ed
/exit
quit
q
/quit
~x
help
help stop
!help
logout
$signoff
write sysop "how do i stop this ???"
psot
post
^P^O^S^T
this line intentionally left blank so that the following line will be #350.
THIS IS THE THREE HUNDRED FIFTIETH LINE OF MY .SIGNATURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
the edn
P.S.:
----------
From mat...@mantis.co.uk Tue Jul 2 11:28:05 1991
To: James 'Kibo' Parry <ki...@world.std.com>
Subject: Re: Call for creation of alt.evolutionary.acceleration
From: Industrial Poet <mat...@mantis.co.uk>
Comments: Civilization is a momentary failure of entropy
Date: Tue, 02 Jul 91 10:55:39 BST
Organization: Mantis Consultants, Cambridge. UK.
Might I suggest adding the following quote to your .signature:
"It seems like it's time to retire the length-of-sig-wasted-bandwidth flame.
The point really is, News is BIG and .signatures, even long ones, are small."
- Mark-Jason Dominus <m...@central.cis.upenn.edu>
mathew
----------
--
--
From st...@sti.com Sat May 9 01:19:46 1992
Date: Fri, 8 May 92 22:19:07 PDT
From: st...@sti.com (Steve Berlin)
To: ki...@world.std.com
Subject: Re: your .sig
Hi there.
Thanks for your nifty .sig. I already got a copy from alt.fan.warlord,
but with such a wonderful work of art, you can never have too many copies,
can you? Well, of course you can! I mean, "Mona Lisa" is a damn good
painting, but am I going to hang it in every room in my apartment? No!
But I digress.
Anyway, to make your .sig a bit more "user-friendly", here is an index for
it. The numbers, of course, refer to line numbers.
I'll let someone ELSE do a table of contents.
Suggestions for index:
1) Append it to the end of the .sig
2) Include it as a seperate file
3) Just delete the damn thing, log off, and watch Ren and Stimpy
or (my favorite): append it to the end of your sig, THEN log off and
watch Ren and Stimpy.
- Stev0
13, Rot - 610-623
Address - 55-58
Autograph, Burroughs, William S. - 527-533
Child, Dying - 155-174
Copyright - 86-88
Credits - 19,20
Dedication - 781-783
Disclaimers - 22-25, 89-98, 142, 153, 216, 276, 474, 677-686, 772, 790
Drawings, ASCII:
Bozo - 644-670
Brain - 28-37
Bunny, Energizer, Being Nuked - 540-556
Check, Amiga - 223-243
Dog - 40-48
Enterprise - 501-506, 692-695
Simpson, Bart, Minimalist - 245-253
Sword - 692-709
Terminator - 478-489
unknown (command flow?) 736-744
unknown (computer?) 293-300
End, The - 775-780, 831
Favorites:
Author - 77-81
Font - 144-146
Heavy Metal Band - 245-253
Movie - 137-138
Movie - 478-489
Painters - 641-643
Quotes - 388-440
Quotes, Star Trek - 507-511
SF Short Story - 207-208
Skeleton Joke - 210
Feh, Fee Fi Fo - 638
Font, BUA - 257-273
Font, Biggest UA - 559-609
GIF, R-Rated - 626-635
History - 2-16
Line 350 - 828
Manuals, MTS - 535-537
Map, Australia - 308-320
Map, Massachusetts - 785-788
Map, Moon 442-473, 748-771
Network, Sean Coates' - 350-362
Peeks, Twin - 176-205
Phobias - 712-716
Posts Made, Number of - 364-386
Quitting Attempts - 794-825
Quotes, Random - 57-75, 83, 84, 99-135, 140-152, 212-214, 321-348,
490-497, 514-525, 723-734
Scissors - 745-746
Score, Tetris - 220
Smilies - 303-305
Space, Blank - 280-291
Virus, .Sig, German - 672-674
====
Alt.alien.visitors elected me OFFICIAL Spokesman For The Planet Earth!
---------
In article <13bvon...@darkstar.UCSC.EDU> car...@cse.ucsc.edu signed:
>-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
>Carol Osterbrock * Life is too short for 4 line .sigs
>car...@cse.ucsc.edu * -- well, if Kibo didn't say it, he should have
>==============================================================================
----------
UN-altered REPRODUCTION and DISSEMINATION of this
IMPORTANT Information is ENCOURAGED.
RMS told me to plug the League For Programmed Freedom in my .signature
so I did. Join the LPF! RMS is cool.
SEE BATMAN 2 !!!!
--
I HAVE A BLACK BELT !
--
SillyWiz
>My other favorite author is Philip K. Dick who wrote "Do Androids Dream Of
>Sheep?", "Clams Of The Alphane Moon", "OBIK", "Man In The Castle", and "Total
>Recall"!
No he didn't. "Piers Anthony" wrote _Total Recall_ based on the screenplay
which was (loosely) based on Philip K. Dick's short story _We Can Remember It
For You Wholesale_ but I guess the error is excusable since in a sig that
horribly long we must expect our grepping friend to make the odd cock-up..
-- the SillyWiz --
-------------------------------------+--------------------------------------
The University of Warwick cares little | It is now wise to turn off your
for my opinions the rest of the time so| Macintosh.
it can't have these if it wants them. | (RESTART)
-------------------------------------+--------------------------------------
Keith Lucas ---- sill...@dcs.warwick.ac.uk , cs...@csv.warwick.ac.uk
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Stewart Stremler
--
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
"En Cee Cee One Seven Oh One.... | Stewart Stremler stremler@
No bloody 'A', 'B', 'C', or 'D'." | FidoNet: 1:202/1111 ucssun1.
--M. Scott | AmigaNet: 40:406/10 sdsu.edu
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sten Drescher
SillyWiz> In article <CJ1vr...@world.std.com> ki...@world.std.com (James "Kibo" Parry) writes:
>> My other favorite author is Philip K. Dick who wrote "Do Androids Dream Of
>> Sheep?", "Clams Of The Alphane Moon", "OBIK", "Man In The Castle", and "Total
>> Recall"!
SillyWiz> No he didn't. "Piers Anthony" wrote _Total Recall_ based on the screenplay
SillyWiz> which was (loosely) based on Philip K. Dick's short story _We Can Remember It
SillyWiz> For You Wholesale_ but I guess the error is excusable since in a sig that
SillyWiz> horribly long we must expect our grepping friend to make the odd cock-up..
Why the quoting of Piers Anthony? It isn't really a pseudonym
(not like, for example, Mark Twain).
--
Sten Drescher s...@floyd.brooks.af.mil
#include <disclaimer.h>
SillyWiz
>SillyWiz> No he didn't. "Piers Anthony" wrote _Total Recall_ based on the screenplay
>SillyWiz> which was (loosely) based on Philip K. Dick's short story _We Can Remember It
>SillyWiz> For You Wholesale_ but I guess the error is excusable since in a sig that
>SillyWiz> horribly long we must expect our grepping friend to make the odd cock-up..
> Why the quoting of Piers Anthony? It isn't really a pseudonym
>(not like, for example, Mark Twain).
Everything I have heard would appear to indicate that Piers Anthony is a psued
-- therefore I quoted it :-). { In the back of his books he sort of explains
why he uses a psued (In the bits that 90% of the readers complain about and
the other 10% insist is essential to understanding lumps of the things.)}
Mind you I probably wouldn't have quoted Mark Twain since half the population
of the planet seems unaware that that's a psued -- it just seemed appropriate.
By the way, that quotation tagging plays merry hell with the line lengths
doesn't it... :-)
Peter David THOMPSON
_Total Recall_... e.g., in the same sense Micro$loth "writes" operating
systems..
Peter "will not read Piers Anthony for food" Thompson
Alec Muffett
>a...@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au (Andrew Bulhak) writes:
>>Andrew Bulhak a...@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au
>>STOP CASTING POROSITY.
> ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>You know, I have seen that sign on Interstate 880 in
>San Leandro CA for over 30 years. Is it in Australia too??
Nah - it's just a political slogan.
- alec
William G. Sinkins
|> well, speaking from *no* firsthand knowledge: it's a game. A multi-user
|> computer game that just recently came out (and was widely hyped beforehand,
|> causing posts like "I *know* it's not released yet, but do you have the
|> solution for XXXX level?"). It's got a "chain gun"
|> (BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP!!!!) and a "God mode" in it somewhere, and is
|> even more efficient than Tetris at tying up computer time (because all its
|> communications [?] packets are *broadcast* over the whole network). Completely
|> took over the .games newsgroup it fits into for a time.
|>
|> Dave "all I know and all I need to know" DeLaney
Dave, you forgot the most important characteristic of DOOM.
It's ADDICTIVE!!!
Bill 'enough netnews, gimme the chainsaw' Sinkins
David DeLaney
>s...@hrt213.brooks.af.mil (Sten Drescher) writes:
>>sill...@dcs.warwick.ac.uk (SillyWiz) writes:
>>> No he didn't. "Piers Anthony" wrote _Total Recall_ based on the screenplay
>> Why the quoting of Piers Anthony? It isn't really a pseudonym
>>(not like, for example, Mark Twain).
>Everything I have heard would appear to indicate that Piers Anthony is a psued
>-- therefore I quoted it :-). { In the back of his books he sort of explains
>why he uses a psued (In the bits that 90% of the readers complain about and
>the other 10% insist is essential to understanding lumps of the things.)}
In the strict sense, it's true; if you look for "Anthony, Piers" in the
appropriate Florida phone book/info guide it won't be there. His name's
Piers Anthony Dillingham Jacob (for those who are totally confused by now) -
he just uses the first two on his books.
Dave "shades of Lord Peter Death Bredon Wimsey" DeLaney
Stewart Stremler
> In article <1994Jan3.0...@martha.utcc.utk.edu>, d...@martha.utcc.utk.edu (David DeLaney) writes:
>
>|> well, speaking from *no* firsthand knowledge: it's a game. A multi-user
>|> computer game that just recently came out (and was widely hyped beforehand,
>|> causing posts like "I *know* it's not released yet, but do you have the
>|> solution for XXXX level?"). It's got a "chain gun"
>|>(BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP!!!!) and a "God mode" in it somewhere, and is
>|> even more efficient than Tetris at tying up computer time (because all its
>|>communications [?] packets are *broadcast* over the whole network).Completely
>|> took over the .games newsgroup it fits into for a time.
> Dave, you forgot the most important characteristic of DOOM.
> It's ADDICTIVE!!!
Actually, it just makes me ill. I can handle the 3-d "realism" up to
about Dungeon Master level, anything more and I have to go lie down
for a bit....
--
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Reality is what you bump into when you | Stewart Stremler
walk around with your eyes closed." | FidoNet: 1:202/1111
--Raymond Fiest | stre...@ucssun1.sdsu.edu
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
James Kibo Parry
In article <2g9lrq$d...@gondor.sdsu.edu>,
Stewart Stremler <stre...@ucssun1.sdsu.edu> wrote:
> That's "Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep" -- you forgot the "Electric".
I love it when people find An Error in my 1000-line .sig, since I took
great care to make sure there were a few hundred of them...
Geez, you'd think the lines packed with a hundred smileys (no, I haven't
counted, but there's shloads o' othem) would be a hint.
-- K.
David Hembrow
>Geez, you'd think the lines packed with a hundred smileys (no, I haven't
>counted, but there's shloads o' othem) would be a hint.
bluff!
---
David Hembrow dav...@harlequin.co.uk Harlequin Ltd, Cambridge, UK
Stewart Stremler
James "Kibo" Parry (ki...@world.std.com) wrote:
> [alt.folklore.computers]
> In article <2g9lrq$d...@gondor.sdsu.edu>,
> Stewart Stremler <stre...@ucssun1.sdsu.edu> wrote:
> > That's "Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep" -- you forgot the "Electric".
> I love it when people find An Error in my 1000-line .sig, since I took
> great care to make sure there were a few hundred of them...
Yah, but I was rolling around on the floor laughing so hard I could barely
read the .sig, much less *notice* the errors :-)
> Geez, you'd think the lines packed with a hundred smileys (no, I haven't
> counted, but there's shloads o' othem) would be a hint.
I didn't think I needed smilies... the fact that someone would dare _correct_
Kibo....is amusing. And to point out _one_ "error" 'midst the multitudes....
Please don't send the HappyNet police after me.
--
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Stewart Stremler stre...@ucssun1.sdsu.edu
Barney the Dinosaur sings! You faint... Barney sings! Barney sings! --More--
You Die... --More--
Chris Marriott
>Everything I have heard would appear to indicate that Piers Anthony is a psued
>-- therefore I quoted it :-). { In the back of his books he sort of explains
>why he uses a psued (In the bits that 90% of the readers complain about and
>the other 10% insist is essential to understanding lumps of the things.)}
His name is actually "Piers Anthony Jacobs", so I guess it is a SORT of
pseudonym.
Chris
--
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Chris Marriott, Warrington, UK | Author of SkyMap v2 shareware |
| Internet: ch...@chrism.demon.co.uk | astronomy program for Windows. |
| CompuServe: 100113,1140 | Mail me for details! |
| Author member of Association of Shareware Professionals (ASP) |
| Windows, C/C++ consultancy undertaken, anywhere in the world. |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Travis Corcoran
In article <2gdhh5$6...@gondor.sdsu.edu> stre...@ucssun1.sdsu.edu (Stewart Stremler) writes:
> William G. Sinkins (wsin...@mbcr.bcm.tmc.edu) wrote:
> > In article <1994Jan3.0...@martha.utcc.utk.edu>, d...@martha.utcc.utk.edu (David DeLaney) writes:
> >
> >|> well, speaking from *no* firsthand knowledge: it's a game. A multi-user
> >|> computer game that just recently came out (and was widely hyped beforehand,
> >|> causing posts like "I *know* it's not released yet, but do you have the
> >|> solution for XXXX level?"). It's got a "chain gun"
> >|>(BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP!!!!) and a "God mode" in it somewhere, and is
> >|> even more efficient than Tetris at tying up computer time (because all its
> >|>communications [?] packets are *broadcast* over the whole network).Completely
> >|> took over the .games newsgroup it fits into for a time.
>
> > Dave, you forgot the most important characteristic of DOOM.
> > It's ADDICTIVE!!!
>
> Actually, it just makes me ill. I can handle the 3-d "realism" up to
> about Dungeon Master level, anything more and I have to go lie down
> for a bit....
Wolfenstein made be a bit sick after playing for 20-30 min. Scrapping
against walls to find secret doors got me ill even faster. Doom,
however, is in a whole 'nother caztegory. Watching my apt.mate play
for even a few seconds gives me a headache and makes me nauseus (sp?).
It's gotten to the pt. that if I lean in his door to say something,
and view a sliver of his monitor at almost 89o off axis, I feel sick.
I've got to think that this has been a learned reaction- I don't
think seeing that little of the game could actually cause that sort of
reaction all on its own.
Nonetheless, Doom is evil.
Too bad. It looks really cool.
--
__
TJIC (Travis J.I. Corcoran) TJ...@icd.teradyne.com
opinions(TJIC) != opinions(employer(TJIC))
"Buy a rifle, encrypt your data, and wait for the Revolution!"
Victor Eijkhout
Yah, but I was rolling around on the floor laughing so hard I could barely
read the .sig, much less *notice* the errors :-)
Could someone mail it to me, or repost? I missed it.
--
Victor Eijkhout ................ `When the coughing increases, I leave out the
Department of Computer Science ...... next variation. If there is no coughing,
University of Tennessee ............... I play them in order. [...] The record
Knoxville TN 37996 .................... so far is 18 variations, in New York.'
+1 615 974 8298 .................. [Rachmaninoff on his 20 Corelli Variations]
Robert Rozee
today i heard _the_ truth; there is no kibo. i have it on good authority
that in fact there are several dozen sites from which 'forged' messages are
sent out under the same usercode and address. 'kibo' was a joke set up
several years ago that just happened to catch on...
regards,
rob.
--
life is but a dream, a dream to understand.
Stewart Stremler
> James "Kibo" Parry (ki...@world.std.com) wrote:
> [ stuff deleted ]
> today i heard _the_ truth; there is no kibo. i have it on good authority
> that in fact there are several dozen sites from which 'forged' messages are
> sent out under the same usercode and address. 'kibo' was a joke set up
> several years ago that just happened to catch on...
Funny. If I finger ki...@world.std.com, I see James "Kibo" Parry has new mail
waiting....
--
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
"OK, so, ten out of ten for style, but minus | Stewart Stremler
several million for good thinking, right?" | stre...@ucssun1.sdsu.edu
--Zaphod Beeblebrox | FidoNet: 1:202/1111
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
SillyWiz
>Kibo....is amusing. And to point out _one_ "error" 'midst the multitudes....
>
>Please don't send the HappyNet police after me.
We do it just to get the mail from him and decrease our Kibo numbers.
It's like starting a sub-flame war on alt.flame or being warlorded, part of
the Netting experience :-)
Philip Hurley
David THOMPSON) writes:
Peter, please clarify what you mean by Piers Anthony wrote Total Recall
since it is based on a Philip K. Dick short story called, "We Can Remember
That Wholesale For You."
Philip Hurley "It cannot be emphasized too strongly or too
T.A.E.X. often that this great nation was founded, not by
Computer Technology religionists but by Christians; not on religions
(409) 845-9689 but on the gospel of Jesus Christ!" -Patrick Henry
p-hu...@tamu.edu I, too, disclaim.
David Lesher
>that in fact there are several dozen sites from which 'forged' messages are
>sent out under the same usercode and address. 'kibo' was a joke set up
>several years ago that just happened to catch on...
Catch on?
Hmm.
P1 are you there?
Big Brother is wise to you. Take cover.
--
A host is a host from coast to coast.................wb8foz@nrk.com
& no one will talk to a host that's close............(301) 56-LINUX
Unless the host (that isn't close)....kibo# 665.99.........pob 1433
is busy, hung or dead..............vr chevron-free.......20915-1433
john baez
>today i heard _the_ truth; there is no kibo. i have it on good authority
>that in fact there are several dozen sites from which 'forged' messages are
>sent out under the same usercode and address. 'kibo' was a joke set up
>several years ago that just happened to catch on...
Kibo will be relieved to hear that.
Feldman / Mark Jeffrey (ISE)
Odd that DOOM is making so many people sick! They put a bunch of stuff in
it to combat the effects people felt with Wolfy...i.e. inertial momentum
and stuff like that so the graphics didn't look too jittery.
Personally I've never had a problem with either of them (except sore eyes
from playing all night long!!!!)
Mark
James Kibo Parry
Hey! I was scheduled to be relieved at midnight! What took you so
long? YOU'RE FIRED!
Next up, kibo is scheduled to be relived. ARTICLES AT 11.
-- K.
James Kibo Parry
In article <2gg3g1$l...@gondor.sdsu.edu>,
Stewart Stremler <stre...@ucssun1.sdsu.edu> wrote:
> Robert Rozee (ro...@elec.canterbury.ac.nz) wrote:
> > James "Kibo" Parry (ki...@world.std.com) wrote:
> > [ stuff deleted ]
>
> > today i heard _the_ truth; there is no kibo. i have it on good authority
> > that in fact there are several dozen sites from which 'forged' messages are
> > sent out under the same usercode and address. 'kibo' was a joke set up
> > several years ago that just happened to catch on...
>
> Funny. If I finger ki...@world.std.com, I see James "Kibo" Parry has new mail
> waiting....
Yeah, but I never actually read it, because I'm just an AI program.
kibo@world /usr/tmp/k 31 Semprini> wc -l /var/spool/mail/kibo
27104 /var/spool/mail/kibo
-- K.
Peter David THOMPSON
>In article <940050...@mulga.cs.mu.OZ.AU> p...@mundil.cs.mu.OZ.AU (Peter
>David THOMPSON) writes:
>>Actually, the original message should say that "Piers Anthony" "wrote"
>>_Total Recall_... e.g., in the same sense Micro$loth "writes" operating
>>systems..
>>
>>Peter "will not read Piers Anthony for food" Thompson
>Peter, please clarify what you mean by Piers Anthony wrote Total Recall
>since it is based on a Philip K. Dick short story called, "We Can Remember
>That Wholesale For You."
I will take this opportunity to restate:
Actually, the original message should say that "Piers Anthony" "wrote"
the book of the movie Total Recall... e.g. in the same sense that
Micro$loth "writes" "operating systems".
Peter "Will insult a pulp machine for food" Thompson
Craig The White Craig Biggio Richardson
This is not true. If you look *very* closely, you will see that
they are all from *different* usercodes and addresses.
However, Kibo is the author of all of them.
--Craig ("... because motorcycles don't have doors. Why do you ask?")
--
Craig S. Richardson (cri...@eskimo.com)
GM - Pullman Sleepers (OBFBL) - "This Train Is Bound For Glory"
GM/Manager - Tacoma Black Adders (IBL) - "Don't Tread On Us"
(shameless woof): finger cri...@eskimo.com for my final NABA 1993 stat line
Graeme Ruthven
Samuel Murphy
Why does this post lack a .sig?
-s
--
Samuel Murphy |"What rolls down stairs alone or in pairs
sa...@smds.com |Rolls over your neighbor's dog?"
(508)369-7398 | -The Log Song, Ren 'n Stimpy
Craig The White Craig Biggio Richardson
>
>>My other favorite author is Philip K. Dick who wrote "Do Androids Dream Of
>>Sheep?"
>
Personally, I preferred "The Three Stigmata of Arnold Palmer"...
--Craig
David DeLaney
>ki...@world.std.com writes:
>[snip]
>>My other favorite author is Philip K. Dick who wrote "Do Androids Dream Of
>>Sheep?"
>[snip]
>Surely the sheep were electric? A ten minute snuffle through my
>bookshelves failed to turn it up, but I remember it as "Do Androids
>Dream of Electric Sheep?"
>Graeme
Graeme, Graeme, Graeme... you haven't been following this thread, have you?
The answers, in order, are a) yes and b) he was just *waiting* for you to ask
that...
Dave "hook, line, sinker" DeLaney
--
David DeLaney: d...@utkux.utcc.utk.edu; ObQuote: `I suggest quoting 'J"K"P' and
'J"RR"P' both. --K' Disclaimer: AFAIK, *nobody* speaks for U.T.Knoxville __
(consistently); Thinking about this disclaimer (or about theor. particle \/
physics) may cause headaches. Vicki and Kibo have not yet met. Kibo #: +1
Simon Slavin
>In article <CJ5CI...@world.std.com> ki...@world.std.com (James "Kibo" Parry) writes:
>>Geez, you'd think the lines packed with a hundred smileys (no, I haven't
>>counted, but there's shloads o' othem) would be a hint.
>>
>> -- K.
>
>Why does this post lack a .sig?
The last two lines are the .sig, I think. It's a minimalist .sig.
... but I'm sure that some warlord will *still* be able to make up
a sonnet about it.
Simon.
--
<"We are all standing in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.">
< - Oscar Wilde. | Help me start up alt.fan.feynman ! | sla...@psy.man.ac.uk >
Graeme Ruthven
>gra...@hektar.welly.gen.nz writes:
[snip]
>>Surely the sheep were electric? A ten minute snuffle through my
>> ^^^^^^^ EEEEEeeeewww!
Don't you mean "EEEEEwwwwweeeee"? ^^^^^^^^^^^^
>>bookshelves failed to turn it up, but I remember it as "Do Androids
>>Dream of Electric Sheep?"
>Graeme, Graeme, Graeme... you haven't been following this thread, have you?
>
>The answers, in order, are a) yes and b) he was just *waiting* for you to ask
>that...
>
>Dave "hook, line, sinker" DeLaney
Well, yes and no. Shall we simply say I wasn't giving it due care and
attention?
You need to understand that coming from a land of 3.5 million people and
60 million sheep makes one slightly sensitive.... You only have to
observe the behaviour of pedestrians crossing the road here to see the
effects of the cross-breeding.
I also rather like the thought of us as the electric sheep, grazing in
the fields of usenet. Better than net.surfing?
Hook line and sinker? They say that when a farmer's son goes courting he
wears a white shirt and tie, sports coat and gumboots. The purpose of
the gumboots is left as an exercise to the reader. I wouldn't know - I'm
a town boy myself.
Graeme - who's never seen a sheep with a hook in its mouth (yet)
--
Brendan Hassett
>today i heard _the_ truth; there is no kibo. i have it on good authority
>that in fact there are several dozen sites from which 'forged' messages are
>sent out under the same usercode and address. 'kibo' was a joke set up
>several years ago that just happened to catch on...
There IS such a thing as a kibo. However it is not a human.
It is an example of artificial intelligence gone wrong. It all started
out as a harmless little program called BiFF.
This program just scanned the net picking up random sentences. It the
jumbled up the sentences, adding LOTS OF UPPERCASE and inter5p@r5Ed
with wierd characters, and posted the rubbish as a new article. It is now
thought that the program was originated by a telecom administration which
wanted to increase usage of the net.
The more advanced version is called the kibo. This was launched as an
attempt to dramatically increase the usage of the net. Therefore kibo
version 1 was equipped with a large sig, which has grown with every new
update. The current model is version 666, which is still laden with bugs.
The most outstanding feature of the kibo is its ability to start new
threads. This is known as the "KIBO trap". This trap is aimed at virgin
netters who will respond to questions such as
"I eat bran for my breakfast. Have you ever heard of anybody else who
does this? If so, please post....."
Whenever the net usage diminishes, the kibo selects a new topic at random
and creates a new trap for the unsuspecting.
There is yet another program loose on the net, known as the Vicki. This
was launched as a psychology research project to see just how gullible
the netters really are. So far it has been very successful (see below).
--------------------------------------------------------------------
| Brendan Hassett Tel +353-902-74601 ext 1109 ECN 830-1109 |
| eei...@eeiud.ericsson.se EEI.E...@memo.ericsson.se ~~~ |
| Ericsson Systems Expertise Ltd, Athlone, Ireland, EU. ( o o ) |
---------------------------------------------------------ooO-(_)-Ooo
#include <vicki.h>
Hannes Reinecke
: ro...@elec.canterbury.ac.nz (Robert Rozee) writes:
: >today i heard _the_ truth; there is no kibo. i have it on good authority
> SNIP <
: There is yet another program loose on the net, known as the Vicki. This
: was launched as a psychology research project to see just how gullible
: the netters really are. So far it has been very successful (see below).
: --------------------------------------------------------------------
: | Brendan Hassett Tel +353-902-74601 ext 1109 ECN 830-1109 |
: | eei...@eeiud.ericsson.se EEI.E...@memo.ericsson.se ~~~ |
: | Ericsson Systems Expertise Ltd, Athlone, Ireland, EU. ( o o ) |
What ? '.se' is in Ireland ? And, most surprising, Athlone got an
Internet-Access ?
(Christ, if I've known this, i could have done something useful during
my holiday :-)
Flames are welcome
Hannes Reinecke
(ha...@vogon.mathi.uni-heidelberg.de)
: ---------------------------------------------------------ooO-(_)-Ooo
: #include <vicki.h>