IBM Mouse Balls Memo
Dixie Lance
Recently on the G. Gordon Liddy show, Mr. Liddy read a "memo" that had
been faxed to him. The memo was allegedly an internal memo from IBM and
went into great detail on the care of and replacement of mouse balls.
While it was admittedly hysterical, it smacked of Urban Myth to me. Has
anyone heard or seen this one?
Dixie Lance gib...@cq.cqi.com
Robyn
Dixie Lance <gib...@cq.cqi.com> wrote:
Yes. I've received it a few times over the past 5 years. I too strongly
suspect it's a hoax, but it's a famously good joke and around these parts
has entered the common lingo; sorry I can't turn up a copy for you at the
moment!
Robyn
Julian Thomas
Dixie Lance <gib...@cq.cqi.com> said:
>allegedly an internal memo from IBM and
>went into great detail on the care of and replacement of mouse balls.
Indeed. That memo was widely and *unofficially* circulated inside IBM a
number of years ago. Inevitably there were escapes to the real world.
--
Julian & Mary Jane Thomas
j...@epix.net http://www.epix.net/~jt
In the beautiful Finger Lakes Wine Country of New York State!
--------------------------------------------------
... File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
David Ecale
Dixie Lance wrote:
> Recently on the G. Gordon Liddy show, Mr. Liddy read a "memo" that had
> went into great detail on the care of and replacement of mouse balls.
> anyone heard or seen this one?
The famous "Mouse Balls" memo was circulated at IBM ca. 1981. It has
wafted through compuret lore ever since. As opposed to it being posted
here, why don't you go to either:
http://altivista.digital.com & enter "mouse balls" ... or
http://www.lycos.com & enter mouse and balls
Enjoy,
--
David Ecale
ec...@cray.com
Mark Decker
I believe this is the one you're talking about;
--------------------------------------------------
"This is an actual alert to IBM Field Engineers that went out to all IBM
Branch Offices. The person who wrote it was very serious."
Abstract: Mouse Balls Available as FRU (Field Replacement Unit) Mouse
balls are now available as FRU. Therefore, if a mouse fails to operate or
should it perform erratically, it may need a ball replacement. Because of
the delicate nature of this procedure, replacement of mouse balls should
only be attempted by properly trained personnel. Before proceeding,
determine the type of mouse balls by examining the underside of the mouse.
Domestic balls will be larger and harder than foreign balls. Ball removal
procedures differ depending upon manufacturer of the mouse. Foreign balls
can be replaced using the pop-off method. Domestic balls are replaced
using the twist-of method. Mouse balls are not usually static-sensitive.
However, excessive handling can result in sudden discharge. Upon
completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used immediately. It is
recommended that each replacer have a pair of spare balls for maintaining
optimum customer satisfaction, and that any customer missing his balls
should suspect local personnel of removing these necessary items.
Robert Billing
> The famous "Mouse Balls" memo was circulated at IBM ca. 1981. It has
Anyone else read the "Galactic Storage Device" one that circulated in
ICL?
--
I am Robert Billing, Christian, inventor, traveller, cook and animal
lover, I live near 0:46W 51:22N. http://www.tnglwood.demon.co.uk/
"Bother," said Pooh, "Eeyore, ready two photon torpedoes and lock
phasers on the Heffalump, Piglet, meet me in transporter room three"
Joe Morris
Dixie Lance <gib...@cq.cqi.com> writes:
>Recently on the G. Gordon Liddy show, Mr. Liddy read a "memo" that had
>been faxed to him. The memo was allegedly an internal memo from IBM and
>went into great detail on the care of and replacement of mouse balls.
>While it was admittedly hysterical, it smacked of Urban Myth to me. Has
>anyone heard or seen this one?
I'll ignore the issue of why anyone should believe anything they hear on a
talk show, regardless of whether its politics are left, right, center, or
vegetarian... <g>
I've seen the memo (more correctly, an umpteenth-generation-photocopy of
the alleged memo); the one I first saw was the one that included a TIE
line number for a point of contact at the factory. Even a cursory reading
of the text should make it clear that the memo is *not* anything that was
ever released by IBM-the-company.
At the obvious risk of perpetuating what may be an urban legend, my
contacts within IBM told me that the "memo" (actually formatted, IIRC, as
a field engineering document) was written as a prank by one of the
engineers at Boca Raton who was quite embarrassed when it somehow found
its way out into the Real World...especially since he had included a real
TIE line number (his own?) in the text. Some copies of the memo have had
the TIE line number deleted.
Question: did anyone within IBM ever try to order the FRU number cited for
the replacement balls?
Joe Morris
John W Hall
Another IBM Balls thing
When discrete transistors gave way to small-ish transistor chips
etc on a ceramic pad, there were two methods of soldering the
chips to the circuit pads.
In one, tiny solder spheres were adhered to the chip by flux,
and the chip lowered onto the ceramic substrate, then heated to
melt the solder. This worked OK, I understand.
But someone came up with an alternative-
the chips were inverted and the solder spheres laid in place,
then it was raised to meet the ceramic substrate and heated. This
was knows as the "Balls-Up" method.
(Perhaps only appreciated by another Brit).
.
--
John Hall - Digital Magic <Digita...@cadvision.com>
"Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic" (Arthur C. Clarke)
Carl R. Friend
Joe Morris, in article nr. <6d3r9v$f...@top.mitre.org>, wrote:
> I'll ignore the issue of why anyone should believe anything they
> hear on a talk show, regardless of whether its politics are left,
> right, center, or vegetarian... <g>
...Big-endian or little-endian... <grin>
> I've seen the memo (more correctly, an umpteenth-generation-
> photocopy of the alleged memo);[...] Even a cursory reading
> of the text should make it clear that the memo is *not* anything
> that was ever released by IBM-the-company.
While I, personally, have little doubt it was a joke (a pretty
funny one, too), one should remember that even large companies could
have a sense of humour in the "old days".
The infamous "Z-Brick" from Data General springs to mind. That
one started as a joke and actualy made it out the door as a supported
item with an ordering number and price quote.
--
______________________________________________________________________
| | |
| Carl Richard Friend (UNIX Sysadmin) | West Boylston |
| Minicomputer Collector / Enthusiast | Massachusetts, USA |
| mailto:carl....@stoneweb.com | |
| http://www.ultranet.com/~engelbrt/carl/museum | ICBM: N42:22 W71:47 |
|________________________________________________|_____________________|
Geoffrey Charles Marshall
"Carl R. Friend" <carl....@stoneweb.com> writes:
> While I, personally, have little doubt it was a joke (a pretty
> funny one, too), one should remember that even large companies could
> have a sense of humour in the "old days".
Not IBM. Still don't. Unless you call releasing "new" machines
with EBCIDIC a joke.... <grin>
> The infamous "Z-Brick" from Data General springs to mind. That
> one started as a joke and actualy made it out the door as a supported
> item with an ordering number and price quote.
I missed that one, would you elaborate ?
Geoff...
--
____________________________________________________________
E-Mail: Geoff C. Marshall <co...@ozemail.com.au>
No Spam please. Private correspondence only.
Please remove from all lists.
____________________________________________________________
The following should PLEASE note this;
ro...@aol.com, postm...@aol.com
ro...@hotmail.com, postm...@hotmail.com
ro...@mail-man.net, postm...@mail-man.net
Bill Kinkaid
Robert Billing <uncl...@tnglwood.demon.co.uk> wrote:
>In article <34F590...@sgi.com> ec...@sgi.com "David Ecale" writes:
>
>> The famous "Mouse Balls" memo was circulated at IBM ca. 1981.
IBM used mice back in 1981?
Bill in Vancouver
(delete EAT-SPAM-AND-DIE
from e-mail address to respond)
Gene Wirchenko
"Carl R. Friend" <carl....@stoneweb.com> wrote:
>Joe Morris, in article nr. <6d3r9v$f...@top.mitre.org>, wrote:
>
>> I'll ignore the issue of why anyone should believe anything they
>> hear on a talk show, regardless of whether its politics are left,
>> right, center, or vegetarian... <g>
>
> ...Big-endian or little-endian... <grin>
Don't forget middle-endian. Or try to.
[snip]
> The infamous "Z-Brick" from Data General springs to mind. That
>one started as a joke and actualy made it out the door as a supported
>item with an ordering number and price quote.
Tell us about the Z-Brick, Uncle Carl. <gd&r>
Sincerely,
Gene Wirchenko
C Pronunciation Guide:
y=x++; "wye equals ex plus plus semicolon"
x=x++; "ex equals ex doublecross semicolon"
Carl R. Friend
Geoffrey Charles Marshall, in article nr. <cs7fd6.g0r.ln@localhost>,
wrote:
>
Enough people have asked over time, and I doubt I'll get in trouble
for it, so....
In the early '80s DG produced a line of top-loading disk drives
known as "Zebras". (For the uninitiated, these things used packs of
10 or so 14-inch-diameter disks and held about 200 MB - my books
aren't handy.) The lid over the disk-pack well lifted upwards and
away in much the same manner as a washing-machine lid.
Unfortunately, the design of the latch holding said lid closed
was a bit on the weak side, so on occasion the lid would pop open
and stop the drive (usually while the drive was seeking hard - see
"disk drive races" in the Jargon File).
The most frequent counter to this problem was to place something
large and heavy atop the lid, so even if the catch let go the lid
would stay shut. This item, in many instances was a concrete block.
DG being the company that it was, was full of jokers, one of whom
painted a bunch of these bricks in the corporate blue colour and
another comedian assigned a part number to them. The part number
bit actually made it into the official list of supported items.
Whether anyone ever _purchased_ a Z-Brick, or requested field
service on one, is open to conjecture.
Some of DG's advertising literature could be pretty funny, too.
I wish I had some of the better copy (some of which isn't really
repeatable in polite, mixed, company).
Ben Hutchings
Dixie Lance <gib...@cq.cqi.com> wrote:
>Recently on the G. Gordon Liddy show, Mr. Liddy read a "memo" that had
>been faxed to him. The memo was allegedly an internal memo from IBM and
>went into great detail on the care of and replacement of mouse balls.
>While it was admittedly hysterical, it smacked of Urban Myth to me. Has
>anyone heard or seen this one?
I've seen it reported in a computer magazine, and heard it on "The News
Quiz" on UK Radio 4, both at least 5 years ago. I believe that it is
genuine but was always intended as a joke.
--
Ben Hutchings, M&CS student | Jay Miner Society website: http://www.jms.org/
email/finger m95...@ecs.ox.ac.uk | homepage http://users.ox.ac.uk/~worc0223/
Sturgeons's Law: Ninety percent of everything is crud.
Tris Orendorff
Dixie Lance <gib...@cq.cqi.com> wrote:
> Recently on the G. Gordon Liddy show, Mr. Liddy read a "memo" that had
> been faxed to him. The memo was allegedly an internal memo from IBM and
> went into great detail on the care of and replacement of mouse balls.
> While it was admittedly hysterical, it smacked of Urban Myth to me. Has
> anyone heard or seen this one?
I've seen this before both as a fax message and email. I don't know who
wrote it originally.
Sincerely,
Tris Orendorff
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RaD Man [ACiD Founder]
Interesting... While I have a variation of the "memo" that includes the
actual FRU numbers. I looked them up in my spare parts catalog and sure
enough...
TO: All IBM field engineers
FROM: Field Replacement Unit
RE: Mouse balls
The Field Replacement Unit is pleased to announce the availability of
mouse balls. Therefore, if a mouse fails to operate or should it perform
erratically, it is now possible to perform a ball replacement. Please
note, however, because of the delicate nature of this procedure,
replacement of mouse balls should only be attempted by properly trained
personnel. Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by
examining the underside of the mouse. Domestic balls will be larger and
harder than foreign balls. Ball removal procedures differ depending upon
the manufacturer of the mouse.
Foreign balls can be replaced using the pop-off method. Domestic balls are
replaced using the twist-off method. Mouse balls are not usually static
sensitive. However, excessive handling can result in sudden discharge.
Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse can be used immediately.
It is recommended that each replacer have a pair of spare balls for
maintaining optimum customer satisfaction, and that any customer missing
his balls should suspect local personnel of removing these necessary
items. To re-order, specify one of the following:
* P/N 33F8462 - Domestic Mouse Balls
* P/N 33F8461 - Foreign Mouse Balls
On 26 Feb 1998 17:08:20 -0800, mde...@voicenet.com (Mark Decker) wrote:
%I believe this is the one you're talking about;
%
%--------------------------------------------------
%
%"This is an actual alert to IBM Field Engineers that went out to all IBM
%Branch Offices. The person who wrote it was very serious."
%
%Abstract: Mouse Balls Available as FRU (Field Replacement Unit) Mouse
%balls are now available as FRU. Therefore, if a mouse fails to operate or
%should it perform erratically, it may need a ball replacement. Because of
%the delicate nature of this procedure, replacement of mouse balls should
%only be attempted by properly trained personnel. Before proceeding,
%determine the type of mouse balls by examining the underside of the mouse.
%Domestic balls will be larger and harder than foreign balls. Ball removal
%procedures differ depending upon manufacturer of the mouse. Foreign balls
%can be replaced using the pop-off method. Domestic balls are replaced
%using the twist-of method. Mouse balls are not usually static-sensitive.
%However, excessive handling can result in sudden discharge. Upon
%completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be used immediately. It is
%recommended that each replacer have a pair of spare balls for maintaining
%optimum customer satisfaction, and that any customer missing his balls
%should suspect local personnel of removing these necessary items.
%
-- enq...@npvq.bet
RaD Man % ACiD Productions Founder % Artpacks Archive Founder
Words to live by: " It's better to be controversial for the
right reasons, than to be popular for the wrong reasons. "
ajandk...@gmail.com
> Recently on the G. Gordon Liddy show, Mr. Liddy read a "memo" that had
> been faxed to him. The memo was allegedly an internal memo from IBM and
> went into great detail on the care of and replacement of mouse balls.
> While it was admittedly hysterical, it smacked of Urban Myth to me. Has
> anyone heard or seen this one?
>
Fact... I was and IBM CE at the thime. This was an actual release to the CE's about maintenance of PC and peripheral products. At the time (around 1988 or so), IBM had recently released the PS/2 product line, which supported the mini-din mouse. A lot of customers had issues with their mouse not working properly due to the mouse collecting dust, dirt, etc inside the mouse, which used the ball to turn encoder wheels. The ball was easily removed, and the dirt could be easily removed from the ball and the encoder spindles. Most CE's had figured this out, but we were al surprised at this tech tip, which was not only not neccesary, but hilarious!
Wayne Chesley
Former IBM CE