The Bible according to Star Wars
Chel
population got wiped out we would have to start anew. What would
happen is that in a few hundred years an archaeologist would discover
a bunch of dvd's with Star Wars on it. He would then become a prophet
of a new religion. After all all the right elements are there:
immaculate conception, good vs evil, turning to the darkside and
returning back to the good etc. His followers wouldn't be called
X-ians but Lukeians or Forceians or Vaderians and he would be pope
Luke the 1st with his main bishopsAnakin and Han Solo (the progressive
bishop).
Basically a few thousand years ago the same thing happened. OK the
earth didn't get wiped out. But some smart charismatic guy has found
some old fables and myths transformed them into a scripture and setup
a new religion. First they were the followers of Jehova and later
Christ. as in first the followers of Obi Wan and later Luke. It's all
there!!!! Believe it, bow for salavtion by Luke and his
followers!!!!!
Satan will have to be beefed up a little though, the image of the
Emperor Palpatine is not as strong and vivid as that of Satan and his
followers burning cats and sacrificing children and performing dark
rituals. After all it has to stay interesting right?
Oh and some splinter groups will not belive in Luke but keep on
believing in Obi Wan they will be the modern age Jews. And some other
groups will rebel against the Lukeians and nail their statements to
the door of the church of St.Luke Skywalker the deafeater of Vader.
They will be the LutherLukes aka Protestant Lukeians. Many more
splinter gorups will form all claiming to have the true word and be
the true descendants of Luke. Crusades will be organized to defeat the
unbelievers whose prophet was Qui Gonn Jinn who has spoken directly to
God and who believe that Luke is not the savior but a prophet i.e.
they are sort of modern day Moslems. They believe that foreskins are
unclean and together with the modern age Jews cut them off of little
boys. This will of course create another point of dispute between
Lukeians and JEws and Moslems.
And so history will repeat itself.
See I made this up in five minutes. Give it 2000 years in development
like X-ians did and you will have a world class religion.
Marduk
Halah
<some shit>
What in the jolly green cunting arsing fucking fuck?
>See I made this up in five minutes.
>
Indeed.
--
Halah - AA #1595 - ULC, EAC, etc.
A thousand smiles from a thousand miles away,
But when you look in their eyes they've got nothing to say.