Re: Just so you know
subRoutine
news:dnk581$k7$3...@blackhelicopter.databasix.com...
> On 12 Dec 2005 02:35:51 GMT, in alt.flame,
> <Xns9729D1667...@207.14.113.17>, "Ralph Waldo Emerson Winchester,
> III" <KILLFIL...@yahoo.com> humped my leg thusly:
>
> >
> >A 600 degree fuser will burn your fingerprints right off.
> >
> >A 9600 RPM 7" grinder will take a chunk out of your leg, but also cauterize
> >the wound, so it won't really bleed.
>
> GONG!
> having done this, only on one of my fingers with a small angle grinder, i
> can say definitively that it will bleed like a stuck pig. ground right
> down to the white knuckle bone. in fact, it will bleed so much that one of
> the indiginous workers at the plant you are in will run to get the UAW shop
> steward, who will squeal in fright at the puddle of blood on the floor 10
> feet under you. the shop steward for this 1200 worker per shift plant will
> then say "doesnt that hurt?!? shouldnt you get that looked at?!?" to
> which you will simply reply "sorry, i really dont have time to bleed." the
> shop steward will then force you, a contractor, to go see the nurse (male),
> who dresses the wound, puts a condom over your finger, and tapes it up. you
> will then return to your task, wary of any who might get close enough to
> see whats covering your finger.
I used to work at a Forest Hills art gallery, which meant I had to go from the
framing department to the frontlines (potential customers) at a moments notice
when I was the only one left running the place. One day, I think I was about 18
or 19, I tried to heave a slim piece of glass, about 48" x 60", onto the glass
cutter but just missed the narrow ledge. At the same moment, the doorbell went
indicating someone had walked in, and that's when my left hand became too sweaty
to hold the piece of glass. The weight of the piece slid down my left hand like
a guillotine cutting into my fingers and hand. (Think of the scene from "Psycho
II" where the chick is trying to pull the knife away from the killer's grasp by
way of the business end of the blade.) I lost so much blood I actually lost
consciousness. I vaguely remember feeling a heat rush before I fell on the
floor. Needless to say, the customer never saw me appear, but about 15 minutes
later, the owner walked in and found me on the floor in a pool of blood. He
thought he walked in to a murder scene at first. When he realized what happened
from the mess of blood and broken glass everywhere, he grabbed a cloth and
wrapped my hand in it. Then he dumped cold water on me to wake me up. The next
thing I knew, I was in the hospital preparing for microsurgery to be done on my
hand to reattach an almost severed finger (just missed the bone by a
millimetre), and to stitch the tendons inside that had been cut off from the
rest of my hand to the fingers. Now I have no feeling in my left pinky. [shrug].
But the stitches look cool and one arm is still hairier than the other because
of the cast. :)
_-
-_
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