-[I]- Birthdays!

[Paul Jamison]

(Four ferrets - a handsome Sable Mountie, a Rabbi and his lovely wife and a
ferret in a hoverchair - more or less step forward.)

Murphy: Folks, we've got a birthdya salute this week, and we *had* planned
on a special guest to help us, but I don't see him anywhere, so I guess -

Max: Look! Up in The sky! (The ferrets look up to see a small object soaring
through the air.

Sammy: Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Is it -

Clarissa: No, it's not him, dear. This fellow is a bit bulkier. And his skin
is green.

Murphy: Green skin?! Gotta be him. This boy can't fly, but he sure can leap!

(The dot gets larger and larger and *very* larger. It is a huge
green-skinned creature. He lands in front of the ferrets and the landscape
jumps like unto an earthquake.)

Sammy: Oy *gvalt*! It's the Incredible... Incredible... say, that's a real
fine suit you're wearing.

The Incredible Hulk: Thank you. Hulk knows terrific tailor in Hong Kong.

Murphy: He did a good job. The shoes look snazzy, too.

Hulk: Shoemaker in Italy.

Clarissa: You're really dolled up! Haircut and everything. What's the
occasion?

Hulk: Movie premieres. Hulk just got back from Sweden.

Max: That's right! "The Avengers"! It opened in the UK a few days ago! We're
looking forward to seeing it Friday!

Clarissa: The Warren Theatre has arranged a special Ferret Night for
Thursday. The place is gonna be packed with fuzzbutts!

Sammy: And it takes a lot of ferrets to pack a place!

Clarissa: Levi is so looking forward to this!

Hulk: Hope he enjoys it. Now, what can Hulk do for birthdays?

Murphy (pulling out piece of paper): Can you read this for us?

(The Hulk takes paper in his large grren hands and stares at it. Then he
scowls and roars.)

Hulk: HULK CAN'T READ THIS!!

Max: Oh-oh. (Ferrets edge away.)

(The Hulk rummages in a suit pocket and comes out with a pair of glasses.)

Hulk (putting glasses on): Much better. (Adjusts glasses.) "Hulk and friends
want to wish happy birthdays to Emmet O'Brien, Marius Loots, VeloraCat,
Nancy Murphy, Grymma, Steph Gray, Ralf, Gordon Steemson, David Sander, Tim
Bagot, Pete Biggs, Thomas Hawtin, Emma Segar, Philippa Chapman, Kat Knight,
Heather Knowles, Dave Le Good, Adam Baker, Eelco Giele, Graham Robinson,
Gelnn Brady, Mark Buckner, Miq, Neil Rashbrook, Tom De Mulder, John Francis,
Warren Jones, Derek Mahony, Jacqui, David Way, Curiosity, Gabriel Krabbe,
Anthony Walton, Rob Vines, Tamar, Tom Pearson, PleegWat, Paul
Something-or-other, Belvadere, Nicholas Wolverson, Bancroft Gracey, Anna
Bertie-Roberts, Catja, Simon Cozens, Stig M. Valstad, Geir Granum, Melinda,
Ann Marie Chalkley and -"

(The Hulk looks closely at paper and smiles.)

Hulk: "- and happy 50th birthday on Tuesday to the Incredible Hulk!?"
(Smiles at ferrets.) Aw, you remembered.

Max: Yep Fifty years ago today. Truth to tell, we didn't know it was coming
up. We saw it in the latest issue of the "AARP Bulletin".

Hulk: Right. Hulk gotta see about membership. Discounts might be nice - eh?

(A young Albino ferret is tugging at the Hulk's Hong Kong suit and staring
up with wide eyes.)

Levi: Uh - Mr. Hulk, sir? (Holds up large piece of paper.) Can I get your
autograph?

Hulk (feeling around suit): Hm. You got pen? - Never mind, here's one.

(Hulk takes paper from Levi and writes out something. He gives it back to
Levi who stares at it with big eyes.)

Murphy (leaning over Lavi's shoulder): "HULK SMASH!!!" Nice. There's a
superhero who knows his fanbase. Nice penmanship.

Clarissa: What do you say, dear?

Levi: Thank you.

Hulk (grinning): Any time. Enjoy movie.


---------------


Paul, who intends to enjoy the movie

[Andrew Nevill]

On Tue, 1 May 2012 19:05:34 -0500, "Paul Jamison" <pjam...@cox.net>
wrote:

[Snip]

>(The Hulk rummages in a suit pocket and comes out with a pair of glasses.)
>
>Hulk (putting glasses on): Much better. (Adjusts glasses.) "Hulk and friends
>want to wish happy birthdays to Emmet O'Brien, Marius Loots, VeloraCat,
>Nancy Murphy, Grymma, Steph Gray, Ralf, Gordon Steemson, David Sander, Tim
>Bagot, Pete Biggs, Thomas Hawtin, Emma Segar, Philippa Chapman, Kat Knight,
>Heather Knowles, Dave Le Good, Adam Baker, Eelco Giele, Graham Robinson,
>Gelnn Brady, Mark Buckner, Miq, Neil Rashbrook, Tom De Mulder, John Francis,
>Warren Jones, Derek Mahony, Jacqui, David Way, Curiosity, Gabriel Krabbe,
>Anthony Walton, Rob Vines, Tamar, Tom Pearson, PleegWat, Paul
>Something-or-other, Belvadere, Nicholas Wolverson, Bancroft Gracey, Anna
>Bertie-Roberts, Catja, Simon Cozens, Stig M. Valstad, Geir Granum, Melinda,
>Ann Marie Chalkley and -"
>
>(The Hulk looks closely at paper and smiles.)
>
>Hulk: "- and happy 50th birthday on Tuesday to the Incredible Hulk!?"
>(Smiles at ferrets.) Aw, you remembered.

Happy Birthday to all of those people - and the Jolly Green Giant

>
>Hulk (grinning): Any time. Enjoy movie.
>
>
>---------------
>
>
>Paul, who intends to enjoy the movie
>

I really enjoyed it. Hope you do too
Andrew Nevill B.F. D.W. FdV. Reply address: nevill...@ntlworld.com
AFPWorshipper to Spooky, AFPfiance to Sarah (Nanny Ogg) pia & Esmeraldus.
AFPUncle to James Vaughan. You cannot value friends as pennies,
nor can you replace them as easily (Spooky in email, Aug 2001.)

[GaryN]

"Paul Jamison" <pjam...@cox.net> wrote in
news:jnpto8$jan$1...@dont-email.me:

> (Four ferrets - a handsome Sable Mountie, a Rabbi and his lovely wife
> and a ferret in a hoverchair - more or less step forward.)

Always wondered.

Did you hijack/rescue some ferrets from Compo in

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Last_of_the_Summer_Wine

I'm sure I spot some attributes of the late, great, Bill Owen in your furry
friends (Particularly "The Lucky Ferret" episode).

Which is all to the good!

gary

> ---------------
>
>
> Paul, who intends to enjoy the movie
>
>

--
"When California slides into the ocean, like the mystics and statistics say
it will
I predict this motel will be standing
Until I pay my bill"

Warren Zevon.

[Paul Jamison]

"GaryN" <webm...@oxtoyrun.org.uk> wrote in message
news:XnsA047F3DE3FE26...@216.196.109.145...

> "Paul Jamison" <pjam...@cox.net> wrote in
> news:jnpto8$jan$1...@dont-email.me:
>
>> (Four ferrets - a handsome Sable Mountie, a Rabbi and his lovely wife
>> and a ferret in a hoverchair - more or less step forward.)
>
> Always wondered.
>
> Did you hijack/rescue some ferrets from Compo in
>
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Last_of_the_Summer_Wine
>
> I'm sure I spot some attributes of the late, great, Bill Owen in your
> furry
> friends (Particularly "The Lucky Ferret" episode).
>
> Which is all to the good!
>
> gary
>

Hm. I've only heard of "Last of the Summer Wine". It was broadcast on a
locel PBS station some years back, and I regret not watching it now. I'll
have to investigate this in more detail.

Paul

[GaryN]

"Paul Jamison" <pjam...@cox.net> wrote in

news:jnsgam$spu$1...@dont-email.me:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1zxY8vmAcs

Not what I was looking for but you get the idea in the first couple of
minutes.

gary

[Lesley Weston]

Try your local library. There are a whole lot of DVDs, though the later
ones are not as good and I've never managed to find the pilot. You need
the ones with Foggy in them; the ferrets become less of a feature later
until the episode with Compo's funeral, and then you don't actually see
the ferrets.

Lesley.

--
This address is real, but to reach me use leswes att shaw dott ca

[Nigel Stapley]

It falls to me to play the curmudgeon card.

LOTSW was funny in its first few years. Unfortunately, it became a
'national treasure' (1) and, as such, was kept running for at least
twenty years after it had *stopped* being funny, because any attempt to
cancel it would have led to a scum-press-led shitstorm and Questions In
The House. It should have been taken off in about 1985. All it was after
that was a sort of day-care centre for elderly thesps.

As you were...

(1) Someone once said that if CBS had been in charge of WW2 it would
have been taken off after 6 weeks, and if the BBC had been running it,
it would still have been going in 1967.

--
Regards

Nigel Stapley

www.thejudge.me.uk

<reply-to will bounce>

[GaryN]

Nigel Stapley <un...@judgemental.plus.com> wrote in
news:9YGdnYYCmfR9Jz_S...@brightview.co.uk:

Actually I fully agree, the first few series were the best. Which may
be why they are the only ones I have on DVD. It should have been
humanely put down, as should Red Dwarf.

Unfortunately the BBC, like Hollywood, will keep repeating a succesful
formula to death instead of trying summat new.

Why do you think we got stuck with Bruce Forsythe and Terry Wogan for so
long?

and of course...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_hj0IEu-P0

gary

[Daibhid Ceanaideach]

On 03 May 2012, GaryN <webm...@oxtoyrun.org.uk> wrote:

> Nigel Stapley <un...@judgemental.plus.com> wrote in
> news:9YGdnYYCmfR9Jz_S...@brightview.co.uk:

>> LOTSW was funny in its first few years. Unfortunately, it became a
>> 'national treasure' (1) and, as such, was kept running for at least
>> twenty years after it had *stopped* being funny, because any attempt
>> to cancel it would have led to a scum-press-led shitstorm and
>> Questions In The House. It should have been taken off in about 1985.
>> All it was after that was a sort of day-care centre for elderly
>> thesps.

> Actually I fully agree, the first few series were the best. Which may
> be why they are the only ones I have on DVD. It should have been
> humanely put down, as should Red Dwarf.

The difference is that LOTSW's problem was that it stuck to the same
tired formula, whereas RD's problem was making sweeping changes for no
apparent reason. "They've lost the ship!" "They have a time machine!"
"They've found the ship and the crew has come back to life! And now
they're in prison!" (The other difference is that RD ran for eight
seasons over 11 years, whereas LOTSW ran for 31 seasons over 37 years.)

Actually, I thought RD8 was okay in places. The characterisation was
pretty good most of the time; I barely even hated The Fake Kochanski.
It's just a shame a lot of the plots were ropey.

IMO the problems are exemplified by Pete, an episode starring an
unconvincing CGI dinosaur in which they'd clearly *started* with the fact
they had access to an unconvincing CGI dinosaur and then tried to write a
plot around it. It's even responsible for the gibberish finale, written
on the spur of the moment when they realised they couldn't afford the
finale they wanted, on acount of blowing the budget on an unconvincing
CGI dinosaur.

--
Dave
The problems in this world are not caused by those who love.
They're caused by those who hate.
--Arthur, King of Time and Space.

[Lesley Weston]

I don't think I would set it that early, but still long before Bill Owen
died. The attempts to keep it going after he died were just plain
embarrassing.

[GaryN]

Daibhid Ceanaideach <daibhidc...@aol.com> wrote in
news:XnsA0499F5EBB8C2da...@130.133.4.11:

> On 03 May 2012, GaryN <webm...@oxtoyrun.org.uk> wrote:
>
>> Nigel Stapley <un...@judgemental.plus.com> wrote in
>> news:9YGdnYYCmfR9Jz_S...@brightview.co.uk:
>
>>> LOTSW was funny in its first few years. Unfortunately, it became a
>>> 'national treasure' (1) and, as such, was kept running for at least
>>> twenty years after it had *stopped* being funny, because any attempt
>>> to cancel it would have led to a scum-press-led shitstorm and
>>> Questions In The House. It should have been taken off in about 1985.
>>> All it was after that was a sort of day-care centre for elderly
>>> thesps.

<snip>

Daibhid,

It really does work that way in the country.

City folk find it hard to understand, I realise that.

If the OD needs a blacksmith who knows a bit (or quite a lot) about
British motorcycles then he's just a phone call away.

The gardener shoots rabbits/pigeons on the property as payment for his
work.

The young lady with Aspbergers keeps her pony there and is allowed to
borrow the horsebox as long as her mother drives.

The woman just down the track has 5 dogs which she walks in the forest
off the lead, often drops in for a cup of tea.

The farm up the road will provide 1/2[1] lamb at a very reasonable rate
come the season.

The local pheasant shoot always provide a couple of brace around
Christmas.

etc, etc.

These things are happening Daibhid, all the time, anywhere without
concrete!

Wake up and smell the flowers!

And sometimes it is quite amusing...

Where do you think the inspiration for LoTSW came from FFS?

gary

[1]Really 1/2 lamb. What you do with it after is your choice.

[Daibhid Ceanaideach]

On 04 May 2012, GaryN <webm...@oxtoyrun.org.uk> wrote:

> Daibhid Ceanaideach <daibhidc...@aol.com> wrote in
> news:XnsA0499F5EBB8C2da...@130.133.4.11:
>
>> On 03 May 2012, GaryN <webm...@oxtoyrun.org.uk> wrote:
>>
>>> Nigel Stapley <un...@judgemental.plus.com> wrote in

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

>>> news:9YGdnYYCmfR9Jz_S...@brightview.co.uk:
>>
>>>> LOTSW was funny in its first few years. Unfortunately, it became a
>>>> 'national treasure' (1) and, as such, was kept running for at least
>>>> twenty years after it had *stopped* being funny, because any attempt
>>>> to cancel it would have led to a scum-press-led shitstorm and
>>>> Questions In The House. It should have been taken off in about 1985.
>>>> All it was after that was a sort of day-care centre for elderly
>>>> thesps.
>
> <snip>
>
> Daibhid,
>
> It really does work that way in the country.

Yeah, fine. Tell it to someone who posted that, not someone who replied
to your reply, and mostly talked about Red Dwarf.

[GaryN]

Daibhid Ceanaideach <daibhidc...@aol.com> wrote in

news:XnsA04C771B59811da...@130.133.4.11:

<snip>

> Yeah, fine. Tell it to someone who posted that, not someone who replied
> to your reply, and mostly talked about Red Dwarf.
>

Apologies, my mistake, replied to the wrong post. I'm only human and I do
get things wrong sometimes!

Quite often actually.

Specially when I'm dosed out on so many different drugs that are supposed
to be good for me that the bastards are fighting each other.

Should have stuck to cigarettes, alcohol and blow. Those I know how to
deal with!

A pint and a packet of peanuts has got to be better for me than this bloody
awful nutritional drink which only comes in flavours that I hate!

I want Complan in black coffee flavour, not bloody chocolate or strawberry.
Admittedly a shot of cheap whisky makes it just about bearable!

gary (Who distinctly lacks a sweet tooth)

--
"If it's political it ain't correct mate, those two words don't fucking
fit"

Kevin Bloody Wilson.

[Daibhid Ceanaideach]

On 07 May 2012, GaryN <webm...@oxtoyrun.org.uk> wrote:

> Daibhid Ceanaideach <daibhidc...@aol.com> wrote in
> news:XnsA04C771B59811da...@130.133.4.11:
>
> <snip>
>
>> Yeah, fine. Tell it to someone who posted that, not someone who
>> replied to your reply, and mostly talked about Red Dwarf.
>>
>
> Apologies, my mistake, replied to the wrong post. I'm only human and
> I do get things wrong sometimes!

No prob, easily done. Looking at my reply, I feel I should apologise for
being a bit sharp.

It was probably the "city folk" line that set me off. I'm not city folk. I
grew up on a council estate that was basically a village, surrounded by
woods and farmland, a good three miles from the town. It's not *my* fault
that, whil I still live in the same council estate, it's now apparently a
suburb of a city, surrounded by other suburbs...

[GaryN]

Daibhid Ceanaideach <daibhidc...@aol.com> wrote in

news:XnsA04DBD6A0C8FFda...@130.133.4.11:

> On 07 May 2012, GaryN <webm...@oxtoyrun.org.uk> wrote:
>
>> Daibhid Ceanaideach <daibhidc...@aol.com> wrote in
>> news:XnsA04C771B59811da...@130.133.4.11:
>>
>> <snip>
>>
>>> Yeah, fine. Tell it to someone who posted that, not someone who
>>> replied to your reply, and mostly talked about Red Dwarf.
>>>
>>
>> Apologies, my mistake, replied to the wrong post. I'm only human and
>> I do get things wrong sometimes!
>
> No prob, easily done. Looking at my reply, I feel I should apologise
> for being a bit sharp.

Meh, fair comment to what I'd posted.

> It was probably the "city folk" line that set me off. I'm not city
> folk. I grew up on a council estate that was basically a village,
> surrounded by woods and farmland, a good three miles from the town.
> It's not *my* fault that, whil I still live in the same council
> estate, it's now apparently a suburb of a city, surrounded by other
> suburbs...

I sometimes think that almost anywhere short of the middle of Exmoor is a
suburb of somewhere. I live in Oxfred for work reasons. Fortunately there
are a couple of decent pubs and some good walks in relatively unspoilt
countryside within reasonable range.

I'd think of moving now I'm too ill to work but can't be arsed. Doctors and
Hospital here have got the hang of me now and the missus can't offload 3
properties in a hurry!

Avoiding the upper reaches of the Thames in Oxfred (between Folly Bridge
and Iffley Lock) with umpty dozen '8s' practicing is advisable. The
towpath is a pleasant walk and you can watch the kingfishers, herons and
great crested grebes, sometimes cormorants; but you're more likely to get
run down by some twat on a bike with a megaphone.[1]

gary

[1]They get upset if you accidentaly stumble and knock them into the Thames
but it's amusing. Not that I'd do something like that on purpose..:-)