[I] The Nation of AFP
The Stainless Steel Cat
Matthew Seaman <m.se...@infracaninophile.co.uk> wrote:
>X Kyle M Thompson <news.arghbug...@spamgourmet.com> writes:
>
>> > Len Oil wrote:
>> [AFP as a state]
>> >> /One/ way, though perhaps not the easiest, would be for all of us to
>> >> occupy some otherwise uninhabited area of land somewhere (natives don't
>> >> count, naturally), declare it the Free Pratchettian States
>> > What about small bits of land? If you own a chunk of land in
>> > Britain, are you allowed to secede from the UK?
>
>We shall need an army and a navy if the UN is going to take us
>seriously. In my persona as international arms dealer, I can
>certainly lay my hands on a Swiss Army Knife. That, some chain mail[1],
>a rowing boat[2] and the services of one Shaun Ogg, and I reckon we're
>all set.
I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the keys to
the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
Eric for Prime Monster, as he's already had political experience.
Leo as the loyal opposition.
Pterry as head of state of course; years of signing sessions will have
given him a strong enough wrist to cope with all the waving.
What else do we need?
If we have a national railway, I baggsy Monster for Transport, as long as I
get to drive the hand-cart.
Cat.
--
Jazz-Loving Soul Mate and Tolerable Frog to CCA
La Rustimuna ^Stalkato
Eric Jarvis
> In article <86llidn...@happy-idiot-talk.infracaninophile.co.uk>,
> Matthew Seaman <m.se...@infracaninophile.co.uk> wrote:
>
> >X Kyle M Thompson <news.arghbug...@spamgourmet.com> writes:
> >
> >> > Len Oil wrote:
> >> [AFP as a state]
> >> >> /One/ way, though perhaps not the easiest, would be for all of us to
> >> >> occupy some otherwise uninhabited area of land somewhere (natives don't
> >> >> count, naturally), declare it the Free Pratchettian States
> >> > What about small bits of land? If you own a chunk of land in
> >> > Britain, are you allowed to secede from the UK?
> >
> >We shall need an army and a navy if the UN is going to take us
> >seriously. In my persona as international arms dealer, I can
> >certainly lay my hands on a Swiss Army Knife. That, some chain mail[1],
> >a rowing boat[2] and the services of one Shaun Ogg, and I reckon we're
> >all set.
>
> I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the keys to
> the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
>
> Eric for Prime Monster, as he's already had political experience.
>
I'm refusing the nomination...I'm strictly backroom stuff...Prime
Minister's Press Secretary OTOH...I don't mind who gets to be PM so long
as I get to tell them what to decide :)
can I propose a position of Secretary of State For Telling People Not To
Be So Damn Stupid?..I think it's something any truly progressive nation
needs right at the heart of government...and may I be the first to tell
the potential candidates for Minister of Pedantry that we won't tolerate
them having a ministry with any more than twice the staff of the Ministry
of Beer and Chocolate
--
eric - afprelationships in headers
www.ericjarvis.co.uk
"live fast, die only if strictly necessary"
Duke of URL
news:BD021F59...@atuin.demon.co.uk...
> In article <86llidn...@happy-idiot-talk.infracaninophile.co.uk>,
> Matthew Seaman <m.se...@infracaninophile.co.uk> wrote:
> >X Kyle M Thompson <news.arghbug...@spamgourmet.com> writes:
> >> > Len Oil wrote:
> >> [AFP as a state]
> >> >> /One/ way, though perhaps not the easiest, would be for all of us to
> >> >> occupy some otherwise uninhabited area of land somewhere (natives
don't
> >> >> count, naturally), declare it the Free Pratchettian States
> >> > What about small bits of land? If you own a chunk of land in
> >> > Britain, are you allowed to secede from the UK?
> >
> >We shall need an army and a navy if the UN is going to take us
> >seriously. In my persona as international arms dealer, I can
> >certainly lay my hands on a Swiss Army Knife. That, some chain mail[1],
> >a rowing boat[2] and the services of one Shaun Ogg, and I reckon we're
> >all set.
>
> I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the keys to
> the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
>
> Eric for Prime Monster, as he's already had political experience.
>
> Leo as the loyal opposition.
>
> Pterry as head of state of course; years of signing sessions will have
> given him a strong enough wrist to cope with all the waving.
>
> What else do we need?
Ooo, ooo, I wanna be the Royal Wine/Whiskey Steward!
Duke of URL
news:MPG.1b4672d16...@news.individual.net...
And here I thought of you for Minister of Silly Walks...
Daibhid Ceannaideach
Date: 25/06/04 18:36 GMT Daylight Time
>The Stainless Steel Cat stee...@atuin.demon.co.uk wrote:
>> I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the keys to
>> the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
>>
>> Eric for Prime Monster, as he's already had political experience.
>>
>
>I'm refusing the nomination...I'm strictly backroom stuff...Prime
>Minister's Press Secretary OTOH...I don't mind who gets to be PM so long
>as I get to tell them what to decide :)
Ooh, I'm good at being told what to decide!
Not so good at speechifying and having trustworthy hair, however.
--
Dave
The Official Absentee of EU Skiffeysoc
http://www.eusa.ed.ac.uk/societies/sesoc
Egret: An apology sent by computer.
-Andy Hamilton, I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue
Eric Jarvis
> From: Eric Jarvis w...@ericjarvis.co.uk
> Date: 25/06/04 18:36 GMT Daylight Time
>
> >The Stainless Steel Cat stee...@atuin.demon.co.uk wrote:
>
> >> I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the keys to
> >> the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
> >>
> >> Eric for Prime Monster, as he's already had political experience.
> >>
> >
> >I'm refusing the nomination...I'm strictly backroom stuff...Prime
> >Minister's Press Secretary OTOH...I don't mind who gets to be PM so long
> >as I get to tell them what to decide :)
>
> Ooh, I'm good at being told what to decide!
>
> Not so good at speechifying and having trustworthy hair, however.
>
sorry...the most important things in a PM are tidy hair and good
teeth...if all else fails we can wedge the blighter into place and use a
ventriloquist...but the hair and teeth are apparently an essential
component of good decision making
David Chapman
> I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the keys to
> the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
>
> Eric for Prime Monster, as he's already had political experience.
>
> Leo as the loyal opposition.
>
> Pterry as head of state of course; years of signing sessions will have
> given him a strong enough wrist to cope with all the waving.
>
> What else do we need?
Adrian and Rocky to be Ministers for Sound.
--
Twelve points to ... SLOVENIA!
The Stainless Steel Cat
Eric Jarvis <w...@ericjarvis.co.uk> wrote:
>The Stainless Steel Cat stee...@atuin.demon.co.uk wrote:
>> Eric for Prime Monster, as he's already had political experience.
>
>I'm refusing the nomination...I'm strictly backroom stuff...Prime
>Minister's Press Secretary OTOH...I don't mind who gets to be PM so long
>as I get to tell them what to decide :)
You sound like an ideal PM to me, but if you're not keen how about we
institute the official post of "Sir Humphrey"? You get a nice wood-panelled
office and you tell the PM what to do. It has the advantage of not having
to completely divest yourself of all honesty, morality and integrity as you
would to be press secretary.
>can I propose a position of Secretary of State For Telling People Not To
>Be So Damn Stupid?..I think it's something any truly progressive nation
>needs right at the heart of government...
Yes, the UK started going downhill when we stopped being shown Public
Information Films;
"Playing with a frisbee in an electrical sub-station can be dangerous."
"If you're having blackouts while driving, stop for a nice cup of tea."
"Should you fall asleep on your lilo and wake up in the middle of the
English Channel about to be run down by a supertanker, it's your own stupid
fault you twit!"
Consider your proposal seconded.
Dom
>Daibhid Ceannaideach daibhidc...@aol.com wrote:
>> Eric Jarvis wrote:
>>>The Stainless Steel Cat wrote:
>>>
>>>> Eric for Prime Monster, as he's already had political experience.
>>>
>>>I'm refusing the nomination...I'm strictly backroom stuff...Prime
>>>Minister's Press Secretary OTOH...I don't mind who gets to be PM so long
>>>as I get to tell them what to decide :)
>>
>>Ooh, I'm good at being told what to decide!
>>
>>Not so good at speechifying and having trustworthy hair, however.
>
>sorry...the most important things in a PM are tidy hair and good
>teeth...if all else fails we can wedge the blighter into place and use a
>ventriloquist...but the hair and teeth are apparently an essential
>component of good decision making
But this is The Nation of AFP. It doesn't play by the daft Round
World rules.
Here leaders have to make sense, drink beer/tea/wine/Irn Bru[1]
and to the Dungeon Dimensions with hair and teeth.
I'm not convinced that Eric would make a good PM, but I'm sure
that he would make a great Minister of Jam and Health (and I can
think of many others which I'm not going to list right now).
As to the rest of the positions...
FiX: Minister of Fermented Grape products (obviously)
Gideon: Min. of Alternate Logic.
Pterry: Min. of Feetneet and Lit.
Graham: Min. of Restraint.
Marco and Orjan: Min. of Relativity
I could go on all evening...[2]
--
Dom
afpSlave to CCA
[1] Not so sure about this one. I tried it once. *Bleugh* It's
probly not eveyones cup of tea.
[2] I won't. But if you think you've been missed out, it's only
because my fingers are tiered. I have thought of Min. posts for
many other AFPers - except myself - perhps Min. of boring posts?
Dom
<snip>
>Yes, the UK started going downhill when we stopped being shown Public
>Information Films;
>
>"Playing with a frisbee in an electrical sub-station can be dangerous."
>
>"If you're having blackouts while driving, stop for a nice cup of tea."
>
>"Should you fall asleep on your lilo and wake up in the middle of the
>English Channel about to be run down by a supertanker, it's your own stupid
>fault you twit!"
Yep, now all we get is Hedgehogs showing us how to cross the road ;-)
CCA
[AFP Ministry]
>What else do we need?
Poet Laureate - Jon Brierley or Daibhid
CCA:)
Daibhid Ceannaideach
Date: 25/06/04 21:03 GMT Daylight Time
<mode = Automodesty with a dash of responsiblity-ducking>
I nominate Jon. No question.
</mode>
Torak
>
> I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the keys to
> the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
Yes! Give me the keys! Oh, *go* on!
But don't make me the entire military... CiC, perhaps, but I wouldn't
want to be associated with the army in any other way...
...bunch of mudcrawlers....
Stevie D
> Eric for Prime Monster, as he's already had political experience.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Love it! :-)
--
Stevie D
\\\\\ ///// Bringing dating agencies to the
\\\\\\\__X__/////// common hedgehog since 2001 - "HedgeHugs"
___\\\\\\\'/ \'///////_____________________________________________
Orjan Westin
> Pterry: Min. of Feetneet and Lit.
No, Min of Education
> Marco and Orjan: Min. of Relativity
Hey, we're not related!
Oh, some more, then:
MegaMole: Min. of Underground transport
Andy: Min. of Overground transport
Richard: Min. of Typecasting
Orjan
Matthew Seaman
> Dom wrote:
> > Pterry: Min. of Feetneet and Lit.
>
> No, Min of Education
King /and/ Court Jester. (It's all a matter of hats.)
Cheers,
Matthew
--
Dr Matthew J Seaman MA, D.Phil. 26 The Paddocks
Savill Way
PGP: http://www.infracaninophile.co.uk/pgpkey Marlow
Tel: +44 1628 476614 Bucks., SL7 1TH UK
Daibhid Ceannaideach
Date: 25/06/04 21:27 GMT Daylight Time
>Dom wrote:
>> Pterry: Min. of Feetneet and Lit.
>
>No, Min of Education
>
>> Marco and Orjan: Min. of Relativity
>
>Hey, we're not related!
>
>Oh, some more, then:
>
>MegaMole: Min. of Underground transport
>Andy: Min. of Overground transport
Nominations for Min. of Wombling Free?
Eric Jarvis
> From: "Orjan Westin" nos...@cunobaros.demon.co.uk
> Date: 25/06/04 21:27 GMT Daylight Time
>
> >Dom wrote:
> >> Pterry: Min. of Feetneet and Lit.
> >
> >No, Min of Education
> >
> >> Marco and Orjan: Min. of Relativity
> >
> >Hey, we're not related!
> >
> >Oh, some more, then:
> >
> >MegaMole: Min. of Underground transport
> >Andy: Min. of Overground transport
>
> Nominations for Min. of Wombling Free?
>
Ben Hutchings...that one's a shoe in
Nigel Stapley
<snip ministerial appointments>
>and may I be the first to tell
> the potential candidates for Minister of Pedantry...
Ooh, me! Me! Please?
I hereby also nominate Gideon for the post of Minister Of Amazingly In-Depth
Background Reading and Alec as Sacratery Of Stoat For Tuping... ;-)
--
Regards
Nigel Stapley
<reply e-mail address will bounce>
Jon
> From: sphir...@aol.com (CCA)
> Date: 25/06/04 21:03 GMT Daylight Time
>
>> The Stainless Steel Cat wrote
>>
>> [AFP Ministry]
>>
>>> What else do we need?
>>
>> Poet Laureate - Jon Brierley or Daibhid
>
> <mode = Automodesty with a dash of responsiblity-ducking>
>
> I nominate Jon. No question.
>
> </mode>
Not a chance. Apart from John Betjeman, the post has been filled by some
right gonnagles, in whose company I would sooner not be numbered. I wanna be
Min for Railways, so I can play with the /big/ trainset.
<hopeful>
Unless there's an opening for Min of Beer?
</hopeful>
--
Remove notme to reply
Eric Jarvis
only if Gid, Huw and Andy fight to the death for the position...and get a
draw
I'm afraid it probably has to be Huw...since he's got monsters to keep
everyone in order...in which case Andy is Secretary of State for Brewing
Beer, and Gid gets Secretary of State for Drinking It
anyway we shouldn't have a Poet Laureate...we should have a Pedant
Laureate
Rhiannon S
>From: stee...@atuin.demon.co.uk (The Stainless Steel Cat)
>Date: 25/06/2004 18:28 GMT Daylight Time
>Message-id: <BD021F59...@atuin.demon.co.uk>
>Pterry as head of state of course; years of signing sessions will have
>given him a strong enough wrist to cope with all the waving.
>
>What else do we need?
Can I be minister for doing absoloutely bugger all and making silly gaffes (or
deputy prime minister as it seems to be known in roundworld)? I have relevant
exp.
--
Rhiannon
http://www.livejournal.com/users/rhiannon_s/
"The trick is to commit crimes so confusing that police feel too stupid to even
write a crime report about them."
Aubrey on remaining at liberty
www.somethingpositive.net
Lesley Weston
stee...@atuin.demon.co.uk wrote on 25/06/2004 10:28 AM:
> In article <86llidn...@happy-idiot-talk.infracaninophile.co.uk>,
> Matthew Seaman <m.se...@infracaninophile.co.uk> wrote:
>
>> X Kyle M Thompson <news.arghbug...@spamgourmet.com> writes:
>>
>>>> Len Oil wrote:
>>> [AFP as a state]
>>>>> /One/ way, though perhaps not the easiest, would be for all of us to
>>>>> occupy some otherwise uninhabited area of land somewhere (natives don't
>>>>> count, naturally), declare it the Free Pratchettian States
>>>> What about small bits of land? If you own a chunk of land in
>>>> Britain, are you allowed to secede from the UK?
>>
>> We shall need an army and a navy if the UN is going to take us
>> seriously. In my persona as international arms dealer, I can
>> certainly lay my hands on a Swiss Army Knife. That, some chain mail[1],
>> a rowing boat[2] and the services of one Shaun Ogg, and I reckon we're
>> all set.
>
> I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the keys to
> the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
Plus the Duke of URL and Stacie. Not sure who would be Supreme Commander -
perhaps they should take turns.
>
> Eric for Prime Monster, as he's already had political experience.
>
> Leo as the loyal opposition.
>
> Pterry as head of state of course; years of signing sessions will have
> given him a strong enough wrist to cope with all the waving.
>
> What else do we need?
Gideon as Minister of Information.
>
> If we have a national railway, I baggsy Monster for Transport, as long as I
> get to drive the hand-cart.
Shouldn't that go to Andy?
--
Lesley Weston.
Brightly_coloured_blob is real, so as not to upset the sys-apes, but I don't
actually read anything sent to it before I empty it. To reach me, use lesley
att vancouverbc dott nett, changing spelling and spacing as required.
Duke of URL
news:BD02383B...@atuin.demon.co.uk...
> "Should you fall asleep on your lilo and wake up in the middle of the
> English Channel about to be run down by a supertanker, it's your own
stupid
> fault you twit!"
"lilo"?
Duke of URL
news:BD020B1B.27560%brightly_co...@yahoo.co.uk...
> in article BD021F59...@atuin.demon.co.uk, The Stainless Steel Cat at
> stee...@atuin.demon.co.uk wrote on 25/06/2004 10:28 AM:
> > In article <86llidn...@happy-idiot-talk.infracaninophile.co.uk>,
> > Matthew Seaman <m.se...@infracaninophile.co.uk> wrote:
> >> X Kyle M Thompson <news.arghbug...@spamgourmet.com> writes:
> >>>> Len Oil wrote:
> >>> [AFP as a state]
> >>>>> /One/ way, though perhaps not the easiest, would be for all of us to
> >>>>> occupy some otherwise uninhabited area of land somewhere (natives
don't
> >>>>> count, naturally), declare it the Free Pratchettian States
> >>>> What about small bits of land? If you own a chunk of land in
> >>>> Britain, are you allowed to secede from the UK?
> >>
> >> We shall need an army and a navy if the UN is going to take us
> >> seriously. In my persona as international arms dealer, I can
> >> certainly lay my hands on a Swiss Army Knife. That, some chain
mail[1],
> >> a rowing boat[2] and the services of one Shaun Ogg, and I reckon we're
> >> all set.
> >
> > I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the keys to
> > the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
>
> Plus the Duke of URL and Stacie. Not sure who would be Supreme Commander -
> perhaps they should take turns.
But I already have my claim in for Minister of Wine & Whisky!
David Jensen
<20040625192433...@mb-m13.aol.com>:
>>Subject: [I] The Nation of AFP
>>From: stee...@atuin.demon.co.uk (The Stainless Steel Cat)
>>Date: 25/06/2004 18:28 GMT Daylight Time
>>Message-id: <BD021F59...@atuin.demon.co.uk>
>
>>Pterry as head of state of course; years of signing sessions will have
>>given him a strong enough wrist to cope with all the waving.
>>
>>What else do we need?
>
>Can I be minister for doing absoloutely bugger all and making silly gaffes (or
>deputy prime minister as it seems to be known in roundworld)? I have relevant
>exp.
I'll bet you've never told a Senator to go f- himself as our 'esteemed'
VP did this week.
Marco Villalta
> Dom wrote:
>
>> Pterry: Min. of Feetneet and Lit.
>
> No, Min of Education
Yeah, an' I think Gideon should have a position rather closer to
the Prime Monster. Monster of Information is a good suggestion.
>> Marco and Orjan: Min. of Relativity
>
> Hey, we're not related!
Last I checked, we're still brothers-in-arms...
> Oh, some more, then:
>
> MegaMole: Min. of Underground transport
> Andy: Min. of Overground transport
> Richard: Min. of Typecasting
Terry seems to be relieved from being Monster of Literature,
which means that post is unattended. How about ppint.?
Mary: Mon. of Intelligible Science
Sanity: Mon. of Health
elfin: Mon. of Defense, alternatively CiC of Chess
Cookie: ... well, need I spell it out?
--
Marco Villalta -- afpStuff in headers
Mary Messall
> Mary: Mon. of Intelligible Science
Or Monster of Demonstrations?
-Mary
--
The blog I said I'd never write --
http://viewfromthecorner.blogspot.com
melinda
> ...bunch of mudcrawlers....
I'll join you in armed forces, if you like. I'm still on the state
team, being a mother hasn't hindered me at all in all honesty I can
say that I'm the best female small bore silohette(sp)[1] shooter in
New South Wales[2]
[1] I don't think the version of tin/vi I use has a spell checker.
[2] It's my opinion that the best female shooter in Australia lives
in Queensland, of silohette any way.
--
Melinda
<http://cust.idl.com.au/athol>
Eric Jarvis
> Marco Villalta wrote:
> > Mary: Mon. of Intelligible Science
>
> Or Monster of Demonstrations?
>
Monster for the Public Understanding of Quantum
we also need to fill the following positions
Secretary of State for Inventing Meaningless Buzzwords
a vital job without which the wheels of government might not grind to a
halt
Foreign Holiday Secretary
one of the key jobs...which will require keeping a close eye on the
World's trouble spots and flying off somewhere else to lie on a beach for
two weeks whenever there is an international crisis
Chancellor of the Spellchecker
Secretary of State for Culture, Heritage and Remembering to Set the Video
and a Hole Secretary who will have the job of making dumb statements about
important issues of the day and who when questioned will simply keep
digging...oh sorry...that's for the UK not the nation of AFP
Aquarion
>>> > Len Oil wrote:
>>> [AFP as a state]
>>> >> /One/ way, though perhaps not the easiest, would be for all of us to
>>> >> occupy some otherwise uninhabited area of land somewhere (natives don't
>>> >> count, naturally), declare it the Free Pratchettian States
>>> > What about small bits of land? If you own a chunk of land in
>>> > Britain, are you allowed to secede from the UK?
>>
>>We shall need an army and a navy if the UN is going to take us
>>seriously. In my persona as international arms dealer, I can
>>certainly lay my hands on a Swiss Army Knife. That, some chain mail[1],
>>a rowing boat[2] and the services of one Shaun Ogg, and I reckon we're
>>all set.
>
> the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
>
>
> Leo as the loyal opposition.
>
> given him a strong enough wrist to cope with all the waving.
>
> What else do we need?
Can I have the Ministry for Common Sense?
Actually, we need a minister for Soaps and Europe (The Home and
Away Office) someone to tell us which mode we're in (Sec. of State),
Ministry for Media (Paxman Stuffing. Actually, thinking on this, since
we have a Ministry for Women[1] and also Sport, Media would be the next
illogical step).
My prime nomination for a new ministry is the Ministry For Not Using
Technical Solutions For Social Problems You Moron, though I think I
caught most of its remit in my inital suggestion.
Oh, we need a Ministry for spelling & punctuation. Volenteer's?
--
Aquarion, http://www.aquarionics.com, aqua...@suespammers.org
Famous Last Words #83: "We are encountering minor turbulence."
[1] As little as I want that argument to ever happen again, I
respectfully take the position that this a step in the wrong direction.
With the obvious sideline that whoever took over the job of "Minister
for Men" would probably spend most of his time writing articles for FHM,
given current popular perceptions.
Eric Jarvis
>
> Oh, some more, then:
>
> MegaMole: Min. of Underground transport
> Andy: Min. of Overground transport
>
I have a punning clan to suggest to the Honourable Monsters.
I know how we can make the trains run on time.
Firstly. To protect the environment we must stop issuing expensive,
wasteful and frankly obsolete paper timetables. This is something that
should be done on the web. Ideally with a Flash only web site, that has a
javascript redirect that ensures that only users of Opera 7.0 can view the
site. We could even block all requests for the site from any domain that
isn't a dot mil. Who would have to be able to see it in case they should
wish to invade and need to know where the trains aren't so they can bomb
all the bridges.
Now, with some clever programming of a content management system we could
update the timetable when required. In fact with a little tinkering and a
web enabled mobile phone in each cab we could ensure that the drivers
updated the time table every time they arrived or departed from a station.
That way every single train would always be on time.
Of course it might be a little difficult for potential passengers to
actually catch a train that way, but have you any idea how much time is
wasted on each train journey simply to let passengers on and off the
train? Frankly, if the public insist on making unreasonable demands on the
rail network they only have themselves to blame if it doesn't operate
effectively.
--
eric - afprelationships in headers
www.ericjarvis.co.uk
"to the man who only has a hammer, everything looks
like a job for somebody with a decent tool kit"
jester
for technology who actually knows what they're talking about.
--
Andy Brown
In 1665 Issac Newton became discouraged when he fell up a flight of
stairs.
David Chapman
> You know, we could do something novel like having a minister responsible
> for technology who actually knows what they're talking about.
Anybody appointed to the position would instantly forget everything they
ever knew. It's compulsory.
--
Twelve points to ... SLOVENIA!
Eric Jarvis
>
> You know, we could do something novel like having a minister responsible
> for technology who actually knows what they're talking about.
>
don't be silly...we can't have a Minister for Technology...by definition
we all have Internet access...what we could have is a Minister for Shiny
Stuff and a Minister for Very Shiny Stuff
--
eric - afprelationships in headers
www.ericjarvis.co.uk
all these years I've waited for the revolution
and all we end up getting is spin
Matthew Seaman
They're very handy for booting all those penguins which tend to get in
the way the typical British day out at the seaside.
Eric Jarvis
> From the Collected Witterings of jester, volume 23:
> > You know, we could do something novel like having a minister responsible
> > for technology who actually knows what they're talking about.
>
> Anybody appointed to the position would instantly forget everything they
> ever knew. It's compulsory.
>
that's true for any Minister...it's something the civil servants put in
their tea
--
eric - afprelationships in headers
www.ericjarvis.co.uk
Diane L.
<snip>
> Foreign Holiday Secretary
> one of the key jobs...which will require keeping a close eye on the
> World's trouble spots and flying off somewhere else to lie on a beach for
> two weeks whenever there is an international crisis
Nominate CCA
> Chancellor of the Spellchecker
Alec?
> Secretary of State for Culture, Heritage and Remembering to Set the Video
That's got to be you, surely?
Diane L.
CCA
>Foreign Holiday Secretary
At last, a role for me! :-)
>one of the key jobs...which will require keeping a close eye on the
>World's trouble spots and flying off somewhere else to lie on a beach for
>two weeks whenever there is an international crisis
As somebody who was on a beach, thinking "I wish I knew how to windsurf" on 11
Sept 2001, I think I qualify here...
>Chancellor of the Spellchecker
Hmmm...that might come in under Chancellor of Ultimate Pedantry, and I think
that's a role that suits most of us, really.
>Secretary of State for Culture, Heritage and Remembering to Set the Video
It really depends on how you define 'Culture'. Are NYPD Blue or Frasier
culture? (No, don't answer that...) I set the video for both of those this
week.
CCA:)
Family Bites Website and Sample Chapter at http://www.falboroughhall.co.uk
Live Journal at http://www.livejournal.com/users/ciciaye
Torak
>>the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
>
> Plus the Duke of URL and Stacie. Not sure who would be Supreme Commander -
> perhaps they should take turns.
COuld do. I'd settle for Minister of Defence, or possibly Air Vice
Marshal, OC AFPAF.
Torak
> In alt.fan.pratchett, mdde...@aol.comlemon (Rhiannon S) wrote in
>>
>>deputy prime minister as it seems to be known in roundworld)? I have relevant
>>exp.
>
> I'll bet you've never told a Senator to go f- himself as our 'esteemed'
> VP did this week.
What, Cheney? Or aren't you a Hern? This sounds amusing....
Torak
> Torak <and...@andrew-perry.com> wrote:
>
>>But don't make me the entire military... CiC, perhaps, but I wouldn't
>>want to be associated with the army in any other way...
>
>>...bunch of mudcrawlers....
>
> I'll join you in armed forces, if you like. I'm still on the state
> team, being a mother hasn't hindered me at all in all honesty I can
> say that I'm the best female small bore silohette(sp)[1] shooter in
> New South Wales[2]
OK, Field Marshal, you have your choice of the regiments.
Rhiannon S
>From: David Jensen da...@dajensen-family.com
>Date: 26/06/2004 01:41 GMT Daylight Time
>Message-id: <gghpd05a05r8sembr...@4ax.com>
Be fair, that's only because I've never met a senator though:o)
Alec Cawley
<and...@andrew-perry.com> writes
> or possibly Air Vice Marshal, OC AFPAF.
The AFPAF would presumably uses broomsticks for fighters, and Klatchian
Magic carpets as bombers and freighters.
--
@lec Šawley
Mike
> > Marco Villalta wrote:
> > > Mary: Mon. of Intelligible Science
> >
> > Or Monster of Demonstrations?
> >
>
> Monster for the Public Understanding of Quantum
>
> we also need to fill the following positions
>
> Secretary of State for Inventing Meaningless Buzzwords
>
> a vital job without which the wheels of government might not grind to a
> halt
>
> Foreign Holiday Secretary
>
> one of the key jobs...which will require keeping a close eye on the
> World's trouble spots and flying off somewhere else to lie on a beach for
> two weeks whenever there is an international crisis
>
> Chancellor of the Spellchecker
>
> Secretary of State for Culture, Heritage and Remembering to Set the Video
>
> and a Hole Secretary who will have the job of making dumb statements about
> important issues of the day and who when questioned will simply keep
> digging...oh sorry...that's for the UK not the nation of AFP
Wow! I've inspired my first sub-thread! Do I win a prize or anything?
How about Under-Secretary of Applied Chaos Theory?[1]
Mike
[1] Oh, wait - that's already a part of the US Gov, I must find new
use for my talents...
Lister
sphir...@aol.com (CCA) chose this moment to say the following
>
>It really depends on how you define 'Culture'. Are NYPD Blue or Frasier
>culture? (No, don't answer that...) I set the video for both of those this
>week.
>CCA:)
A woman that can set the video? *gasp*
<gd&rlf)
--
Hokey Pokey
---------------------------
Third leg in, third leg out
In, out, in, out, shake it all about
Richard Bos
> Richard: Min. of Typecasting
And of experimental epistemology, if possible.
Richard
Andrew Gray
> You know, we could do something novel like having a minister responsible
> for technology who actually knows what they're talking about.
You mean this isn't the white heat of technology? BRing back Tony Benn,
say I...
--
-Andrew Gray
andre...@dunelm.org.uk
David Jensen
<40DD59C...@andrew-perry.com>:
Yes, Cheney was unhappy with Senator Patrick Leahy
<http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/nm/20040626/pl_nm/campaign_cheney_dc_2>
Apparently Cheney doesn't like it when people question his ethics. Just
because he is acting as if he has put Halliburton's welfare over the
welfare of the US doesn't mean he actually has.
Eric Jarvis
how about just plain simple Vice Marshal?...let's be inclusive here...we
shouldn't discriminate on grounds of vice
Eric Jarvis
>
> "Eric Jarvis" <w...@ericjarvis.co.uk> wrote in message
> news:MPG.1b4728d07...@news.individual.net...
>
>
> That's got to be you, surely?
>
I don't have a video, so I'm well qualified...but I'm going to be too busy
as Prime Monster's Press Secretary trying to keep everyone on
message...hell. I'll have done well if I can keep more than two or three
members of the government on topic for more than a minute
I nominate ppint
Lesley Weston
MacB...@kdsi.net wrote on 25/06/2004 5:30 PM:
> "Lesley Weston" <brightly_co...@yahoo.co.uk> wrote in message
> news:BD020B1B.27560%brightly_co...@yahoo.co.uk...
>> in article BD021F59...@atuin.demon.co.uk, The Stainless Steel Cat at
>> stee...@atuin.demon.co.uk wrote on 25/06/2004 10:28 AM:
>>> In article <86llidn...@happy-idiot-talk.infracaninophile.co.uk>,
>>> Matthew Seaman <m.se...@infracaninophile.co.uk> wrote:
>>>> X Kyle M Thompson <news.arghbug...@spamgourmet.com> writes:
>>>>>> Len Oil wrote:
>
>>>>> [AFP as a state]
>>>>>>> /One/ way, though perhaps not the easiest, would be for all of us to
>>>>>>> occupy some otherwise uninhabited area of land somewhere (natives
> don't
>>>>>>> count, naturally), declare it the Free Pratchettian States
>>>>>> What about small bits of land? If you own a chunk of land in
>>>>>> Britain, are you allowed to secede from the UK?
>>>>
>>>> We shall need an army and a navy if the UN is going to take us
>>>> seriously. In my persona as international arms dealer, I can
>>>> certainly lay my hands on a Swiss Army Knife. That, some chain
> mail[1],
>>>> a rowing boat[2] and the services of one Shaun Ogg, and I reckon we're
>>>> all set.
>>>
>>> I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the keys to
>>> the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
>>
>> Plus the Duke of URL and Stacie. Not sure who would be Supreme Commander -
>> perhaps they should take turns.
>
> But I already have my claim in for Minister of Wine & Whisky!
So you can hold two portfolios, no problem. There are precedents.
--
Lesley Weston.
Brightly_coloured_blob is real, so as not to upset the sys-apes, but I don't
actually read anything sent to it before I empty it. To reach me, use lesley
att vancouverbc dott nett, changing spelling and spacing as required.
Lesley Weston
Also large slabs of blue stone from the Prescelly Mountains.
Dom
>Marco Villalta wrote:
>> Mary: Mon. of Intelligible Science
>
>Or Monster of Demonstrations?
Possibly I've seen too much of Fred Dibnah on telly, but I read that
as Monster of Demon-striations[1] and thought of monsters with weird
stripes.
[1] For those few who haven't heard of Fred, he's an old bloke in a
flat cap who does a lot of programmes for the Beeb on old
engineering type things such as steam engines and mills and the like.
He often does "Demon-strations" (as he pronounces it).
Cracks me up every time :-)
Nice bloke and fascinating programmes though.
--
Dom
afpSlave to CCA
CCA
>The Stainless Steel Cat wrote:
>> I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the keys to
>> the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
>Yes! Give me the keys! Oh, *go* on!
>But don't make me the entire military...
I think we need a Minister For Really Sharp Things :-)
A role that could be time-shared between Torak, Orjan, Ingvar, Marco, Barry R,
Stacie Hanes, Melinda, and probably quite a few I've missed out too.
Maybe an additional Minister For Really Amazingly Sharp Things...
Dom
>Orjan Westin nos...@cunobaros.demon.co.uk wrote:
>>
>> MegaMole: Min. of Underground transport
>> Andy: Min. of Overground transport
>
>I know how we can make the trains run on time.
(Snip Eric's clunning pan)
It's a bit ironic to think that one of the reasons that we have fixed
time zones (and not every town has it's own local time) is *because*
of the railway timetables.
When it used to take days to get from London to York (or wherever)
it didn't matter that York's clocks were $FOO minutes ahead/behind
those of London.
With the advent of fast trains and the journey cut down to a few hours,
the time difference became important.
Basically, the clocks were set by the trains.
If we go back to this way of working, then the trains will always run
on time.
;-) (obligatory smiley to state that I am not being serious -
although the first half of the post is true)
Dom
Yep, armed with monster water guns and pillows. :-)
Dom
>The time, 26 Jun 2004 11:07:14 GMT , The place, alt.fan.pratchett .
>sphir...@aol.com (CCA) chose this moment to say the following
>
>>It really depends on how you define 'Culture'. Are NYPD Blue or Frasier
>>culture? (No, don't answer that...) I set the video for both of those this
>>week.
>>CCA:)
>
>A woman that can set the video? *gasp*
Oy, that's sexist.
Don't you mean "Someone over the age of 11 who can set the video?"
CCA
>(CCA) chose this moment to say the following
>>It really depends on how you define 'Culture'. Are NYPD Blue or Frasier
>>culture? (No, don't answer that...) I set the video for both of those this
>>week.
>A woman that can set the video? *gasp*
>
><gd&rlf)
Hey, I'll have you know I regularly set the video *and* the timer-recording
function on mine and my Dad's stereos. And fixed my Mum's car stereo so it'd
actually work. And fixed my Great-Uncle's camera (okay, so that was a matter
of putting the batteries in the right way around and winding it on *g*). And
found out what was wrong with his computer (verdict - it was bust).
I can use a drill, too! (Which, BTW, is great fun, heh heh heh...)
Irina Rempt
(al...@lessmann-consulting.com) wrote:
> Dear Sir or Ma'am Stainless Steel Cat,
>
> I hereby apply for the Ministry of scritching the cats behind the ears
> and assorted other animals wherever it pleases them.
I know a penguin that likes that. Only it doesn't have any ears to speak
of, so you have to guess where to scritch it (and when you guess wrong
it'll oblige by turning its head to the right position).
Irina
--
Vesta veran, terna puran, farenin. http://www.valdyas.org/irina/
Beghinnen can ick, volherden will' ick, volbringhen sal ick.
http://www.valdyas.org/foundobjects/index.cgi Latest: 14-Jun-2004
Matt
Oy, that's out of date!
I'm 18 now.
--
Matt
The Stainless Steel Cat
Torak <and...@andrew-perry.com> wrote:
>COuld do. I'd settle for Minister of Defence, or possibly Air Vice
>Marshal, OC AFPAF.
Remember this is AFP. An AFPan Air Vice Marshall would wear an inflatable
stetson, a gold "Marshall" badge and handcuffs by Graham.
Cat.
--
Jazz-Loving Soul Mate and Tolerable Frog to CCA
La Rustimuna ^Stalkato
Mary Messall
> Mary Messall wrote:
>>Marco Villalta wrote:
>>>Mary: Mon. of Intelligible Science
>>Or Monster of Demonstrations?
> Possibly I've seen too much of Fred Dibnah on telly, but I read that
> as Monster of Demon-striations[1] and thought of monsters with weird
> stripes.
Monsters being closely related to demons, this probably makes
more sense than the rest of the suggestions in this thread.
> [1] For those few who haven't heard of Fred, he's an old bloke in a
> flat cap who does a lot of programmes for the Beeb on old
> engineering type things such as steam engines and mills and the like.
> He often does "Demon-strations" (as he pronounces it).
Whereas I wanted people to pronounce it "de-monstration".
In the sense that science debunks some of our childhood fears,
demonstratations probably are de-monstrations.
> Cracks me up every time :-)
> Nice bloke and fascinating programmes though.
/me watched a lot of 1950s era Mr. Wizard while studying for
qualifiers...
-Mary
--
The blog I said I'd never write --
http://viewfromthecorner.blogspot.com
Lister
alt.fan.pratchett . dom...@blueyonder.co.uk (Dom ) chose this moment
to say the following
>Lister wrote:
>>The time, 26 Jun 2004 11:07:14 GMT , The place, alt.fan.pratchett .
>>sphir...@aol.com (CCA) chose this moment to say the following
>>
>>>It really depends on how you define 'Culture'. Are NYPD Blue or Frasier
>>>culture? (No, don't answer that...) I set the video for both of those this
>>>week.
>>>CCA:)
>>
>>A woman that can set the video? *gasp*
>
>Oy, that's sexist.
Yes, did you not notice the grinning?
>
>Don't you mean "Someone over the age of 11 who can set the video?"
I can program mine, and I'm 23
Kegs
> On 2004-06-26, jester <use...@jester.nu> wrote:
>> You know, we could do something novel like having a minister responsible
>> for technology who actually knows what they're talking about.
>
> You mean this isn't the white heat of technology?
No, the HSE shut it down before it could burn anyone ;)
--
James jamesk[at]homeric[dot]co[dot]uk
Geek - Someone who doesn't know when to stop asking "why?"
Eric Jarvis
> Andrew Gray <andre...@dunelm.org.uk> writes:
>
> > On 2004-06-26, jester <use...@jester.nu> wrote:
> >> You know, we could do something novel like having a minister responsible
> >> for technology who actually knows what they're talking about.
> >
> > You mean this isn't the white heat of technology?
>
> No, the HSE shut it down before it could burn anyone ;)
>
Statement From the Prime Monster's Office
Progress is good, and like all good things should be taken in moderation.
So we are stepping cautiously sideways into a new era, where we shall do
fairly comfortably in the cosy reddish glow of marginally obsolete
technology.
<insert name here> Prime Monster of AFP
Brian Howlett
[snip]
>
> <insert name here> Prime Monster of AFP
>
Waitaminnit..!
Who elected <insert name here> as PM? I haven't even received my voting
card yet...
Has there been one of them political coos then? [1]
[1] Not to be confused with military coos, which supply milk and beef to
the armed forces...
--
Brian Howlett
---------------------------------------------------
This place would be a paradise tomorrow, if every
department had a supervisor with a sub-machine gun.
Alec Cawley
<dia...@lindquist.clara.co.uk> writes
>
>"Eric Jarvis" <w...@ericjarvis.co.uk> wrote in message
>news:MPG.1b4728d07...@news.individual.net...
>
>
>Alec?
Now that sounds a good job. The Spellchecker is obviously the
Governments liaison/supervisor with Unseen University. Which means
attending lots of big dinners while the wizards spend a lot of time
explaining the subtleties of how willing they would be to do all the
useful things that you cannot ask them to do. The only downside would be
Ridcully Being Friendly.
--
@lec Šawley
Stacie Hanes
> Dear Sir or Ma'am Stainless Steel Cat,
>
> I hereby apply for the Ministry of scritching the cats behind the
> ears and assorted other animals wherever it pleases them.
Careful, you may get diagrams with that job.
--
Stacie, fourth swordswoman of the afpocalypse.
"If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to be a horrible
warning." Catherine Aird, _His Burial Too_
"swordswomen of the afpocalypse" copyright Jon of afp, 2004.
Stacie Hanes
> Torak wrote
>
>> The Stainless Steel Cat wrote:
>
>>> I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the
>>> keys to the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
>
>> Yes! Give me the keys! Oh, *go* on!
>
>> But don't make me the entire military...
>
> I think we need a Minister For Really Sharp Things :-)
> A role that could be time-shared between Torak, Orjan, Ingvar,
> Marco, Barry R, Stacie Hanes, Melinda, and probably quite a few
> I've missed out too.
> Maybe an additional Minister For Really Amazingly Sharp Things...
I wouldn't mind being Minister for Flexible Weapons. I've got more whips
than swords, now that I count them.
PussInSpooks
>David Chapman
>> Anybody appointed to the position would instantly forget everything they
>> ever knew. It's compulsory.
>>
>
>that's true for any Minister...it's something the civil servants put in
>their tea
>
Then maybe we need to have a Minister for Tea. Oh gwan, gwan, gwan, gwan, gwan,
gwan...............
Torak
>
> Magic carpets as bombers and freighters.
Well, it would of course have to go through the AFPDRADA (AFP Defence
Research And Development Agency, officially known as QompliQated), but
it is believed that we could issue a recommendation for household
implements as aircraft within the near future. At the appropriate juncture.
Torak
>
>>COuld do. I'd settle for Minister of Defence, or possibly Air Vice
>>Marshal, OC AFPAF.
>
> Remember this is AFP. An AFPan Air Vice Marshall would wear an inflatable
> stetson, a gold "Marshall" badge and handcuffs by Graham.
Why? I'm Minister of Defence, I'll just rewrite the uniform manual.
Or I'll just rename the rank. :-D
Eric Jarvis
> Aleks A.-Lessmann wrote:
> > Dear Sir or Ma'am Stainless Steel Cat,
> >
> > I hereby apply for the Ministry of scritching the cats behind the
> > ears and assorted other animals wherever it pleases them.
>
> Careful, you may get diagrams with that job.
>
Statement From The Office Of The Prime Monster
In these difficult times it is essential that we all pull together and put
the interests of the country before our own. As a consequence the Ministry
of scritching the cats behind the ears and assorted other animals wherever
it pleases them has never been more important to the Nation of AFP.
[push chin slightly forward to show resolution and determination]
That said, we believe that flexibility is important, and each animal
should be scritched as a unique case. There are no simple solutions, there
are no quick fixes, and there are no free lunches except for government
ministers on official business. So to paralyse the Minister with
unnecessary regulation would be very [short pause] very very wrong.
[brush hand through hair languorously]
Which is why we have issued a comprehensive set of instruction on how to
scritch any form of animal in any place whatsoever in accordance with
current best practise, [smile, pause] but will leave them in a drawer in
the basement of the Ministry of scritching the cats behind the ears and
assorted other animals wherever it pleases them where they can gather dust
and never again see the light of day.
[smirk conspiratorially]
Thank you all for your concern about this vital issue. [lean forward a
little] With your help we can make sure that in the coming days no cat, or
other animal, remains unscritched behind the ears, or wherever it pleases
them.
[smile to camera]
<insert name here> Prime Monster of AFP
--
eric - afprelationships in headers
www.ericjarvis.co.uk
all these years I've waited for the revolution
and all we end up getting is spin
Jenny Radcliffe
> I wouldn't mind being Minister for Flexible Weapons. I've got more
> whips than swords, now that I count them.
Well, so have I, but that's only because I won a riding crop in a raffle
once[1]. What's your excuse?
I shall be very disappointed if they're really for horse-related purposes,
or something.
Jenny
[1] At an Ann Summers party[2]
[2] For charity[3]
[3] Which makes it all perfectly respectable[4]
[4] Posting is easier than packing, which is what I ought to be doing.
Matt
wrote:
> CCA wrote:
>> Torak wrote
>>
>>> The Stainless Steel Cat wrote:
>>
>>>> I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the
>>>> keys to the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
>>
>>> Yes! Give me the keys! Oh, *go* on!
>>
>>> But don't make me the entire military...
>>
>> I think we need a Minister For Really Sharp Things :-)
>> A role that could be time-shared between Torak, Orjan, Ingvar,
>> Marco, Barry R, Stacie Hanes, Melinda, and probably quite a few
>> I've missed out too.
>> Maybe an additional Minister For Really Amazingly Sharp Things...
>
> I wouldn't mind being Minister for Flexible Weapons. I've got more whips
> than swords, now that I count them.
I think that post's taken by Graham ;)
--
Matt
Darin Johnson
> Apparently Cheney doesn't like it when people question his ethics. Just
> because he is acting as if he has put Halliburton's welfare over the
> welfare of the US doesn't mean he actually has.
Apparently Cheney doesn't understand US politics. The chief
difference between US legislators and British ones, is that
the US ones are polite to each other. He should have said
"the right honorable senator can go F himself." US politicians
attack each others policies only (ad hominem attacks are usually
left to their followers to engage in).
Cheney's reason for his testiness is striking - he didn't like that
Leahy made insinuations against him on the senate floor, then later
tried to shake hands as if nothing had happened. But that's _exactly_
how politics works in the US. You disagree with your opponent, then
head out and have dinner with each other later. Politics is supposed
to be just business, not something personal.
--
Darin Johnson
Caution! Under no circumstances confuse the mesh with the
interleave operator, except under confusing circumstances!
Mary Messall
> Cheney's reason for his testiness is striking - he didn't like that
> Leahy made insinuations against him on the senate floor, then later
> tried to shake hands as if nothing had happened. But that's _exactly_
> how politics works in the US. You disagree with your opponent, then
> head out and have dinner with each other later. Politics is supposed
> to be just business, not something personal.
What makes it so weird is that Cheney was supposed to be the
mature one. You know? Old, worldly-wise. Evil, possibly, but made
of self-control. Just the kind of guy you'd think would smile and
smile and stick the knife in, in classic political style. It's
surprising to find him this provokable. Maybe even a little
humanising. His feelings were hurt... Who knew he was so sensetive?
melinda
> The time, 26 Jun 2004 11:07:14 GMT , The place, alt.fan.pratchett .
> sphir...@aol.com (CCA) chose this moment to say the following
> >It really depends on how you define 'Culture'. Are NYPD Blue or Frasier
> >culture? (No, don't answer that...) I set the video for both of those this
> >week.
> >CCA:)
> A woman that can set the video? *gasp*
> <gd&rlf)
There are a few of us around. I used to set the video at my parents
and I'm the only person between the two us here that knows how to
our VCR.
--
Melinda
<http://cust.idl.com.au/athol>
Stacie Hanes
> Stacie Hanes scrawled across my screen:
>> I wouldn't mind being Minister for Flexible Weapons. I've got more
>> whips than swords, now that I count them.
>
> Well, so have I, but that's only because I won a riding crop in a
> raffle once[1]. What's your excuse?
I never make excuses.
> I shall be very disappointed if they're really for horse-related
> purposes, or something.
No, I only like to hit people. If it can make some go "ow!" then I want one,
preferably in green and black.
Darin Johnson
> What makes it so weird is that Cheney was supposed to be the mature
> one. You know? Old, worldly-wise. Evil, possibly, but made of
> self-control.
Exactly. He was supposed to be the Dr. No type of Evil, where he
served the good guys expensive food and wine before putting them in
the easily escapable death traps.
--
Darin Johnson
I'm not a well adjusted person, but I play one on the net.
melinda
> melinda wrote:
> > Torak <and...@andrew-perry.com> wrote:
> >>But don't make me the entire military... CiC, perhaps, but I wouldn't
> >>want to be associated with the army in any other way...
> >>...bunch of mudcrawlers....
> > I'll join you in armed forces, if you like. I'm still on the state
> > team, being a mother hasn't hindered me at all in all honesty I can
> > say that I'm the best female small bore silohette(sp)[1] shooter in
> > New South Wales[2]
> OK, Field Marshal, you have your choice of the regiments.
Ta muchly, decisions, desicions....
--
Melinda
<http://cust.idl.com.au/athol>
Paul Jamison
"Mary Messall" <mmes...@ups.edu> wrote in message
news:HeydnZNA9YF...@comcast.com...
Okay, I've heard assertions that George W. is gradually losing it (I don't
know for certain that this is true, but one can only hope), something
like Nixon supposedly did near the end, but would the pressure be
getting to Cheney, too? Is the entire Bush regime on the verge of
cracking up? Or is this wishful thinking as well?
The next few months in American politics are going to prove
interesting, likely in the Chinese-curse way.
Paul
--
"Who reads, learns, lives the Ferret Way becomes keeper
of light, ennobling outer worlds from one within."
- a prophecy from the Ancients
Eric Jarvis
>
> Okay, I've heard assertions that George W. is gradually losing it (I don't
> know for certain that this is true, but one can only hope), something
> like Nixon supposedly did near the end, but would the pressure be
> getting to Cheney, too? Is the entire Bush regime on the verge of
> cracking up? Or is this wishful thinking as well?
>
it happens to "true believers" when they have political power...it seems
to be almost a universal rule...Thatcher definitely was on a different
planet for at the very least the last five years of her time in office,
probably longer...I'm not sure it's happening to Blair, but it has
happened to Blunkett
seeing everything in black and white is great when you are in
opposition...plays really well with the voters...and you can get away with
a few years of it whilst in power if you are lucky and surrounded by
enough sycophants...but the fact is there is only so often you can kid
yourself before it becomes a serious strain...and the Bush regime have
done a whole bundle of things they knew would produce a particular result
and it hasn't worked out that way...so either they got some things badly
wrong or everyone is conspiring against them...a "true believer" will
usually believe the latter
I think Bush and Cheney really believed that the war on terrorism would be
effective and would make them heroes the world over...discovering that
terrorism has increased in the last year can't have done either of them
any good in the self confidence stakes...Iraq didn't turn out to be easy
in and easy out...even Blair is taking umbrage at Guantanamo Bay...they
haven't made a huge positive difference to the US economy...the business
leaders for whom they reduced the burden of tax and regulation have
responded by committing large scale fraud and outsourcing jobs
overseas...so either they got it all wrong or they are being stabbed in
the back by everyone they expected to be grateful...I think Bush might
accept the idea that he's made mistakes...I don't believe Cheney is
capable of it
--
eric - afprelationships in headers
www.ericjarvis.co.uk
"Hey Lord don't ask me questions
There ain't no answer in me"
Andy Davison
> I'm afraid it probably has to be Huw...since he's got monsters to keep
> everyone in order...in which case Andy is Secretary of State for Brewing
> Beer, and Gid gets Secretary of State for Drinking It
Of course, as Secretary of State for Brewing Beer, there will be a certain
amount of quality control necessary. Hic! :)
--
Andy Davison
an...@oiyou.force9.co.uk
Thomas Zahr
I'd be perfectly happy to lend a hand, eh, mouth ;)
--
Ciao
Thomas =:-)
<Good sig's are rare>
Caroline Alexander
> Daibhid Ceannaideach daibhidc...@aol.com wrote:
> > From: Eric Jarvis w...@ericjarvis.co.uk
> > Date: 25/06/04 18:36 GMT Daylight Time
> >
> > >The Stainless Steel Cat stee...@atuin.demon.co.uk wrote:
> >
> > >> Eric for Prime Monster, as he's already had political experience.
> > >>
> > >
> > >I'm refusing the nomination...I'm strictly backroom stuff...Prime
> > >Minister's Press Secretary OTOH...I don't mind who gets to be PM so long
> > >as I get to tell them what to decide :)
> >
> > Ooh, I'm good at being told what to decide!
> >
> > Not so good at speechifying and having trustworthy hair, however.
> >
>
> sorry...the most important things in a PM are tidy hair and good
> teeth...if all else fails we can wedge the blighter into place and use a
> ventriloquist...but the hair and teeth are apparently an essential
> component of good decision making
Vote for me! I've got the hair and teeth (see my brandnew a-files
entry), plus I'm exeptionally good at saying the wrong things at the
wrong times and then explaining what I *really* meant in other people's
words. Also I have a talent for being absent when unappropriate. Perfect
choice? Someone tell me!
--
Carl.
Torak
> CCA wrote:
>>Torak wrote
>>>The Stainless Steel Cat wrote:
>>
>>>>I vote for Torak as our entire military (just don't give him the
>>>>keys to the armoury or we'll never see him again.)
>>>
>>>Yes! Give me the keys! Oh, *go* on!
>>
>>>But don't make me the entire military...
>>
>>I think we need a Minister For Really Sharp Things :-)
>>A role that could be time-shared between Torak, Orjan, Ingvar,
>>Marco, Barry R, Stacie Hanes, Melinda, and probably quite a few
>>I've missed out too.
>>Maybe an additional Minister For Really Amazingly Sharp Things...
>
> I wouldn't mind being Minister for Flexible Weapons. I've got more whips
> than swords, now that I count them.
I daren't ask why, but you've got the job.
The only whips I've got are riding sticks... and they're only used for
riding, before you ask.
OTOH, really good swords should be slightly flexible... *and* amazingly
sharp.
Torak
> On Sat, 26 Jun 2004 20:20:44 GMT, Stacie Hanes
>>
>> than swords, now that I count them.
>
> I think that post's taken by Graham ;)
Nah, he can be... er... Prisons And Discipline Minister. Yes.
Torak
> Torak <and...@andrew-perry.com> wrote:
>
>>OK, Field Marshal, you have your choice of the regiments.
>
> Ta muchly, decisions, desicions....
Quin's Own Lancre Highlanders?
Torak
Nunc? Quare? Non nimius bibitis, aut plenum diem singultetis.
(Cogitunt actum est de... Nunc id est.) [1]
[1] - OK, so I just stumbled over "all over with" in my dictionary, I
just had to use it. ;-)
But you know what my Latin grammar's like. It's dreadful - fortunately
most people nowadays don't know enough Latin to spot it!
Lister
alt.fan.pratchett . Torak <and...@andrew-perry.com> chose this moment
to say the following
>Stacie Hanes wrote:
Which begs the question... "Riding whom"? :P
--
Hokey Pokey
---------------------------
Third leg in, third leg out
In, out, in, out, shake it all about
CCA
> I used to set the video at my parents
>and I'm the only person between the two us here that knows how to
>our VCR.
I'm the only person in our house who does. My parents haven't quite yet taken
the "why don't you two learn how to do it, it might come in useful one day"
hint *g*
CCA:)
Family Bites Website and Sample Chapter at http://www.falboroughhall.co.uk
Live Journal at http://www.livejournal.com/users/ciciaye
CCA
>I've got the hair and teeth (see my brandnew a-files
>entry)
<Looks at A-Files entry>
Nice photo :-)
(Can't see the tattoos, though...;-)
CCA:)
Leo Breebaart
The A Files, for those who don't know, is the name of an on-line
gallery found at:
<http://www.lspace.org/fandom/afp/a-files/>
featuring pictures and even some voice recordings of those who
have, at one time or another, identified as afpers, or #afpers,
or afpmeet-attenders, or whatnot. The usual gang of idiots, in
other words.
Yesterday, I finally got around to emptying the incoming queue
again (which means it's now *empty*, and crying out for *new
submissions*, hint, hint), and in the process I also fixed a
longstanding image-processing bug that was causing all pictures
(especially the thumbnails) to appear horribly fuzzy, vague, and
unsharp on the web pages. It wuz BAD, but everything is now crisp
and sharp again.
If you'd like to join the A Files, then please e-mail me a
suitable photo at <a-f...@lspace.org>, and any relevant info
you'd like to see included as per:
<http://www.lspace.org/fandom/afp/a-files/about.html>
and I promise I will add your entries by next weekend (instead of
letting them marinate for three months, as happened with this
last batch).
How's about it, folks? Does not the Esteemed Leadership of the
Nation of AFP deserve a Portrait Gallery where its honourable
members can be displayed in all their splendour and glory, for
the teeming millions to take pride in?
--
Leo Breebaart <l...@lspace.org>
Eric Jarvis
Statement From The Office of the Prime Monster
There are a number of essential tasks which lie at the heart of
government. We shall endeavour to ensure that we all pull together to
complete these tasks with enthusiasm, commitment and care. Such tasks will
not be handled in a restrictive and parochial manner by a single ministry.
All within our government will be doing their utmost to make certain that
all beer, wine and chocolate is produced to a suitable standard.
<insert name here> Prime Monster of AFP
--
eric - afprelationships in headers
www.ericjarvis.co.uk
"I am a man of many parts,
unfortunately most are no longer in stock"
CCA
[A-Files]
>Yesterday, I finally got around to emptying the incoming queue
>again (which means it's now *empty*, and crying out for *new
>submissions*, hint, hint)
<Looks at new photos>
Hey, what happened to the dancing photo of Kyle? I liked that! (Though the
current one looks very good too...)
CCA:)