[F] Natural History Museum - Meet Report
Maurice Barnes
On a muggy Saturday lunchtime on the steps of the NHM in London, an
intrepid band of afp'ers gathered. In time people appeared who, if
not imediately recognising the froup were soon caught in the filter
system set up at the museum entrance to strain them from the
induhviduals.
Cigerettes were lit to hasten the arrival of latecomers, to no avail,
we decided to enter and page them if they turned up later.
The museum itself is BIG and so we made our way to the primary reason
for our visit, the Myths and Monster Exhibition. Everyone loved the
animatronic dragon, which would make an excellent centrepiece at the
Con (are you listening<g>), there was also a unicorn, cyclops, chimera
and a close relation who you wouldn't wish to meet in a darkened
reference section. Also displayed were the Death of Snakes ("Where
does it hold the scythe?"-Lot) a fillited Ribbonfish, one of those big
lizard things from Madagascar, or is it New Guinea? and several other
descriptions of beasts of yore. A strategically placed shop at the
end of the exhibition yielded the meet mascot, Nessie, of which
several were purchased. Unfortunately no-one could remember the names
of the Family Ness.
After a brief wander round the bookshop the party split into those
areas they found interesting and diverting, there is so much to take
in at one visit, I think most people had tired feet by the end of the
afternoon. Further peoples arrived during the course of the afternoon
and were happened upon and given shelter and food, well jellybeans.
I think most people experienced the earthquake, although nobody
mention if the earth moved for them <groan>.
After a good 5 hours exploring and playing with the interactive
exhibits (which some group members took as a trial of strength) we
retired to the excellent Southside Bar, just up the road and part of
Imperial College (thank-you for suggesting it David). It was on the
grass of a small park infront of the bar that quality alcohol was
consumed, Thomas was chased and assaulted and a tree was climbed
frequently and in some cases, with a certain grace. Also afp members
came to the rescue of a stricken pigeon (dark pied hen) which had its
feet caught in black thread. This was skillfully removed by the
steady had of Janice who we all expect to go to the Con as Doughnut
Jimmy, or at least get a part on Afpnimal Rescue<g>. Both Carol and
Warwick brought a selection of chocolate coated, I can only call them
"items" several of which were eaten. - I still have garlic breath,
thank-you Carol - .
Here are the written notes from the NHM Meet.
Chocolate coated
(by) Warwick
fried egg
mushroom
black pudding
beef grill
a tap (P/achtually an inline valve or stopcock/p)
raw egg (unshelled) [1]
Calamari
CD Rom (Computer Shopper)
Bacon
Sausages
(by) Carol
Tap
Cheery
Stuffed Ollive
Duck (rubber)
Prawn
Coffee Beans
AFP Recipes (3 1/2 Inch Disk)
Clementine
Lemon Tea (for those sick of cccb's)
Garlic Cloves
Monkey Nut (ouch)
Orange segments
The ubiquitous Quotes
<Lot>The Official Meet Cuddly Toy, It's got to be done!
<Thomas>You don't need to zip it. It's not that big.
<Warwick>We want to know if Joanna is available to perform in
September.
<Gid>That's not a floppy, that's a stiffy.
<Tap>I knew Suzi was jailbait, I didn't know you were.
<Gid>The last sixteen years have been illegal.
<Suzi>I'm now looking for bookings for the 8th August.
<Maurice>It would be more hygenic if I slept in a tent.
<Hampster>Whips and Chains?
<Carol>No he's a software engineer.
<Maurice>Have you got a hosepipe?
<Barry>Do you need another pair of hands to carry them.
<Carol>I think you scared him off.
<Carol>Only AFP could geek about strimmers.
<Gid>You're trying to screw it the wrong way.
<Maurice>Is it still attached to the shaft?
<Carol>You're supposed to show some cleavage
<Darren>Is your wrist getting tired?
<Maurice>Do you want to share a 12 inch?
<Lot>Does it come with a side salad?
<Lot>Oooh, thousand island dressing.
<Thomas-running away>Gods I hate this!
<Janice>He really does a good Rincewind.
<No one owned up>Just suck on it!
<Janice>It's down the bottom somewhere. <Suzi> I know. I'm having a
good rummage.
<Vicci>Be a horsey!
<Lottie>Maurice has fed a pigeon some chili.
(No wonder I caught)
<Warwick>Has anyone got a knife. I just want to seperate its legs.
<Carol>Darren, What are you doing to my daughter?
<Thomas>Here take my trousers.
<Vicci to Darren>Could you not ask me to stop. Pleeease?
<Darren>As long as it's legs are open, It doesn't really matter.
<Barry>I've got a couple.
<Maurice - hanging from tree> Well? Take the picture then!
<Lottie>I've never had enough
<Tap>Oh. I enjoyed that. Next time would you mind not putting your bum
in my face?
<Dale>There are maniacs from every direction.
<Vicci> It's AFP!
<Tap>Carol, I hope that was your hand!
<Tap>Suzi, I've found out what that vibration was at 80 mph on the M1.
<Maurice>If I can get it down.
<Tap>We've gotta get off.
<Suzi>It seems to have stuck.
<Gid>Have you ever fingered a coke machine?
<Barry to Janice>Half or Pint?
<Janice> Yes.
Attendees: Tap, Carol, Dale, Vicci, Gid, Suzi, Maurice, Lot(Relief
stealer of hats), Warwick, Joanna, Mark, Kayla+S.O.&offspring, Thomas,
Darren, Janice, Barry, & Hannah (who left early).
Feel free to add, subtract, or alter at your leisure.
Barry R. B.F. The Official Sad Bastard
Edited and added to by:-
{}{}{}{}{}{}{}
Maurice Barnes - bar...@globalnet.co.uk - Keeper of the Greens.
Procurer of The Forbidden Fruit to T*mpl*s of Distinction.
By Appointment to the Gid Holyoake Harem.
{}{}{}{}{}{}{}
Warwick
Maurice Barnes <*bar...@globalnet.co.uk> wrote in article
<6lesbg$uid$2...@library.lspace.org>...
> were soon caught in the filter
> system set up at the museum entrance to strain them from the
> induhviduals.
Weird, it even cought peeps who'd already gone in.
> Cigerettes were lit to hasten the arrival of latecomers,
The nicorette inhalator didn't seem to help either
>
> The museum itself is BIG and so we made our way to the primary reason
> for our visit, the Myths and Monster Exhibition. Everyone loved the
> animatronic dragon,
Animatronic? I thought it was real!
> and a close relation who you wouldn't wish to meet in a darkened
> reference section.
Thomas?
> descriptions of beasts of yore.
Why did I read that as breasts of yore?
> After a brief wander round the bookshop
Brief - we were sending rescue parties in - some of them were in there for
an hour.
> Further peoples arrived during the course of the afternoon
> and were happened upon and given shelter and food, well jellybeans.
Anyone want to buy a tyre? Slighly used. It has an additional quick release
system for pressure relief.
> I think most people experienced the earthquake, although nobody
> mention if the earth moved for them <groan>.
>
(fx: Holds up hand) ermm well I did but very quietly,
> exhibits (which some group members took as a trial of strength) we
And speed *grin*
> grass of a small park infront of the bar that quality alcohol was
> consumed,
less than £20 for 10 drinks *sigh*
> came to the rescue of a stricken pigeon (dark pied hen) which had its
OK so who sexed the pigeon? and how?
> Chocolate coated
>
> fried egg
not so good
> mushroom
not sure
> black pudding
yes! gorgeous
> beef grill
hmmm
> raw egg (unshelled) [1]
[1] what?
> Bacon
Yummy!
> Sausages
To be official meet food
> Cheery
Yum
> AFP Recipes (3 1/2 Inch Disk)
I ate it!
> Garlic Cloves
*cackle*
> Monkey Nut (ouch)
You only get two....mmphh
> The ubiquitous Quotes
>
<Suzi> Try it at Warwick speed!
> <Warwick>Has anyone got a knife. I just want to seperate its legs.
Mis-representation - That was Tap!
> Feel free to add, subtract, or alter at your leisure.
Done that!
Warwick
--
C:\sig.txt - file not found
Suzi
Warwick wrote:
>
> Maurice Barnes <*bar...@globalnet.co.uk> wrote in article
> <6lesbg$uid$2...@library.lspace.org>...
>
> > for our visit, the Myths and Monster Exhibition. Everyone loved the
> > animatronic dragon,
Never mind Warwick... the Dragon wasn't real (although very good and who
was it who instigated the "Dragon... Dragon... Dragon..." chant to try
and summon a real one?)... The little green man at the end of the
ehibit, however, I'm not so sure about (I'm sure he moved <g>).
> > descriptions of beasts of yore.
> Why did I read that as breasts of yore?
Because that's the sort of person you are... every proto-Gid must learn
to mis-parse everything they read - it's in the contract or summat
<g>...
> > After a brief wander round the bookshop
> Brief - we were sending rescue parties in - some of them were in there for
> an hour.
Trouble was - it was a bookshop, so the resue parties didn't emerge
either... until people's stomachs started to tell them it was lunchtime
anyway.
> > I think most people experienced the earthquake, although nobody
> > mention if the earth moved for them <groan>.
> >
> (fx: Holds up hand) ermm well I did but very quietly,
He did! He did! (I heard him <g>)
> > The ubiquitous Quotes
> >
> <Suzi> Try it at Warwick speed!
Damn... I thought that one had been forgotten...
Anyway - Maurice: thanks for organising a really enjoyable day out
Suzi
--
(afpsister to Ross & Peter & Lottie and afpcousin to Thomas / AFPetite)
"You could turn it into Suzi, and it sounded as though you danced on
tables for a living.." Soul Music http://www.netcomuk.co.uk/~gidnsuzi/
New to afp? mailto:new...@lspace.org and browse http://www.lspace.org/
David Underdown
Maurice Barnes wrote:
>
> After a good 5 hours exploring and playing with the interactive
> exhibits (which some group members took as a trial of strength) we
> retired to the excellent Southside Bar, just up the road and part of
> Imperial College (thank-you for suggesting it David). It was on the
> grass of a small park infront of the bar that quality alcohol was
> consumed,
have 3 finals left I didn't think it was to wise. Still a great shame,
especially as I won't have too many more opportunities to go to
Southside. Iwas hoping to do a Ph.D here but I found out today that
they don't want me (Sob). I guess I had better find my way to the
careers office now.
David U
lipk...@i-2000.com
Natural history and Pratchett. Two of my favorite subjects, together at
last -- and I had to be in a different country! I tell ya, life ain't
fair.
If I'd known, I would have asked someone to say hello to _Baryonyx_ for
me. England may not have had (or at least preserved) that many
dinosaurs, but it sure did have weird ones.
-DL
(no sig still pending)
Maurice Barnes
Suzi <Suzi.H...@capgemini.co.uk> annunciated to the gathered
multitude :
>Trouble was - it was a bookshop, so the resue parties didn't emerge
>either... until people's stomachs started to tell them it was lunchtime
>anyway.
I think it was because they were all so shocked to find one without
one of TP's books in they had to go round and check again and again
and again. I think the nearest we got was a turtle shaped book
(waterproof and chewable) for the under 3's. It lacked in plot
somewhat IIRC.
AFPCode 1.1 AB/NL$-UK d s+:-- a@24 UP++ R++ F++ h P-- OSD--: C+
M- pp L+ c B+ Cn-:+ PT+ Pu@51 5+ !X MT? eV+>V r/p-- y-- end
Maurice Barnes (Mr O.)- bar...@globalnet.co.uk
All Things Discworldly at http://www.lspace.org
Barry R
On Sun, 07 Jun Maurice brightened our day with a report of the NHM Meet:
<snip>
>raw egg (unshelled) [1]
<snip>
>Barry R. B.F. The Official Sad Bastard
>Edited and added to by:-
>Maurice Barnes - bar...@globalnet.co.uk - Keeper of the Greens.
[1] oops[2]
[2] Missing footnote should read
Who eventually got this?
Barry R B.F.
Barry R
On Sun, 07 Jun Maurice brightened our day with a report of the NHM Meet:
>Unfortunately no-one could remember the names of the Family Ness.
I thought Thomas named quite a few.
>After a brief wander round the bookshop the party split into those
>areas they found interesting and diverting, there is so much to take
>in at one visit, I think most people had tired feet by the end of the
>afternoon.
I can state most definitely that the Museum is too big to properly tour
over two days, let alone an afternoon. I actually went back on the
sunday just to see the rest of the museum.[2]
>After a good 5 hours exploring and playing with the interactive
>exhibits (which some group members took as a trial of strength) we
>retired to the excellent Southside Bar, just up the road and part of
>Imperial College (thank-you for suggesting it David). It was on the
>grass of a small park infront of the bar that quality alcohol was
>consumed, Thomas was chased and assaulted and a tree was climbed
>frequently and in some cases, with a certain grace.
I'm just glad no-one got my bat impression on camera.
>The ubiquitous Quotes
><Lot>The Official Meet Cuddly Toy, It's got to be done!
Yay, Nessie!!!!!
><Thomas>You don't need to zip it. It's not that big.
Who then immediately placed his head in his hands.
><Maurice>Is it still attached to the shaft?
I thought it was a rotating shaft?
><Dale>There are maniacs from every direction.
><Vicci> It's AFP!
A new Sig.
><Tap>Suzi, I've found out what that vibration was at 80 mph on the M1.
Immediately followed by <TapMode=blush>
>Attendees: Tap, Carol, Dale, Vicci, Gid, Suzi, Maurice, Lot(Relief
>stealer of hats), Warwick, Joanna, Mark, Kayla+S.O.&offspring, Thomas,
>Darren, Janice, Barry, & Hannah (who left early).
Barry R. B.F. The Official Sad Bastard
To Email Replace .commie with .com
Any hangover is a good hangover.
It means you had the money to go drinking.
[2] and didn't manage all of it. I think I'll buy a season ticket. I
should be able to manage _most_ of it in a year. ;)
Carol
Maurice Barnes wrote:
> Cigerettes were lit to hasten the arrival of latecomers, to no avail,
> we decided to enter and page them if they turned up later.
We couldn't help being late - circumstances ganged up on us.... or at
least the car did.
> The museum itself is BIG and so we made our way to the primary reason
> for our visit, the Myths and Monster Exhibition. Everyone loved the
> animatronic dragon, which would make an excellent centrepiece at the
> Con (are you listening<g>), there was also a unicorn, cyclops, chimera
> and a close relation who you wouldn't wish to meet in a darkened
> reference section. Also displayed were the Death of Snakes ("Where
> does it hold the scythe?"-Lot) a fillited Ribbonfish, one of those big
> lizard things from Madagascar, or is it New Guinea? and several other
> descriptions of beasts of yore. A strategically placed shop at the
> end of the exhibition yielded the meet mascot, Nessie, of which
> several were purchased. Unfortunately no-one could remember the names
> of the Family Ness.
McToot, Angua, Elspeth.... GrumpiNess, Prettiness..... And Thomas knew
loads more....
> I think most people experienced the earthquake, although nobody
> mention if the earth moved for them <groan>.
*20p*
> After a good 5 hours exploring and playing with the interactive
> exhibits (which some group members took as a trial of strength) we
> retired to the excellent Southside Bar, just up the road and part of
> Imperial College (thank-you for suggesting it David).
Yep, great choice of venue.... and the pizza's were good too.
> Both Carol and Warwick brought a selection of chocolate coated, I can
> only call them "items" several of which were eaten. - I still have
> garlic breath, thank-you Carol
Most of the things I made were edible - some even pleasantly so....
> Chocolate coated
> (by) Carol
>
> Tap
Well, just his mustache actually....
> The ubiquitous Quotes
> <Vicci to Darren>Could you not ask me to stop. Pleeease?
That was to Thomas actually...
Darren was the one teaching Vicci how to 'pose' like the bimbo's on the
front cover of a trashy sf novel...
> Attendees: Kayla+S.O.&offspring,
That's The Flying Hamster (the SO), Katrina and David.
Thanks to Maurice for organdising a very enjoyable meet.
Carol
--
Carol Willis http://www.afawcett.demon.co.uk/carol/
Carol
Warwick wrote:
> Maurice Barnes <*bar...@globalnet.co.uk> wrote in article
> <6lesbg$uid$2...@library.lspace.org>...
> > system set up at the museum entrance to strain them from the
> > induhviduals.
We opted for the traditional method of finding afpers in public - head
for the nearest coffee vendor.... and it worked!
> > descriptions of beasts of yore.
> Why did I read that as breasts of yore?
Because you wouldn't be you if you didn't?
> > After a brief wander round the bookshop
> Brief - we were sending rescue parties in - some of them were in there
> for an hour.
That is brief for a visit to a bookshop
> > Further peoples arrived during the course of the afternoon
> > and were happened upon and given shelter and food, well jellybeans.
> Anyone want to buy a tyre? Slighly used. It has an additional quick
> release system for pressure relief.
No thanks, we bought two on the way to the meet...
Oook
Carol wrote...
> > <Vicci to Darren>Could you not ask me to stop. Pleeease?
Nope, that was at me, it was just after you had told her that the same
applied to me as it did to Thomas.
> Darren was the one teaching Vicci how to 'pose' like the bimbo's on the
> front cover of a trashy sf novel...
Well yes that was me, but I only was demonstrating what you had said
yours ubiquitously
Darren
--
Life is a sexually transmitted disease
anonymous
Maurice Barnes
"Warwick" <Paul_k...@dial.pipex.com> annunciated to the gathered
multitude :
>OK so who sexed the pigeon? and how?
The hens are smaller than the cock birds. When your father flies them
you tend to pick these bits of information up (as well as the odd
pigeon or two).
I just hope I never have the trouble with it that that parking
attendant has had with that seagull.
Loriba
In article <6lesbg$uid$2...@library.lspace.org>, *bar...@globalnet.co.uk
says...
> <Tap>Oh. I enjoyed that. Next time would you mind not putting your bum
> in my face?
I'd just like to add that just before Tap said this to me, I managed to
sprain my ankle - it didn't hurt much at the time, but gods...was I in
pain yesterday.
I won't mention *how* I managed to sprain my ankle if you don't want me
to Tap<g>.
Loriba
--
Guardian of the Sacred CCG's.46% AFP Pure. Official
Member of the Gid Holyoake Harem. AFPTall.
--
Warwick
Barry R <Bar...@compuserve.commie> wrote in article
> I'm just glad no-one got my bat impression on camera.
>
Hey! I won't see what photo's I got until 10:30 today so don't say things
like that until you're certain!
Warwick
Andy Fawcett
> > bum in my face?
> to sprain my ankle - it didn't hurt much at the time, but gods...was I
> in pain yesterday.
It was a day for hurting feet/ankles...
Carol did it earlier in the day, and my feet were killing me before we
started the museum bit...
> I won't mention *how* I managed to sprain my ankle if you don't want
> me to Tap<g>.
Oh, that's sweet m'dear, how can I ever thank you enough?
--
Andy Fawcett
Writing from work, but writing for himself
http://www.afawcett.demon.co.uk/
Barry R
On 9 Jun 1998 Warwick posteded the following article:
>Hey! I won't see what photo's I got until 10:30 today so don't say things
>like that until you're certain!
>Warwick
Oh. I am *totally* certain that you didn't get a picture of that,
Considering the fact that you were on a branch just below me. (AFAICR)
<Mode=*HINT*HINT*>
*Nobody* got a photo, did they?
</Mode>
Oh good.
Barry R. B. F. The Official Sad Bastard. (Y&UGZY)
To Email replace.commie with .com.
"All aboard the last train to Sanityville." "Sanity, what's that then?"
"I don't know, I missed the train."
Barry R
On Sun, 07 Jun Maurice brightened our day with a report of the NHM Meet:
Mark Lowes-Larter.
A repeat of the story Carol?, or is it Highly classified?
Barry R. B. F. The Official Sad Bastard. (Y&UGZY)
To Email replace.commie with .com.
Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right
Here I am, Stuck in the middle of AFP
Carol
Barry R wrote:
> On Sun, 07 Jun Maurice brightened our day with a report of the NHM
> Meet:
> After having re-read the above report, I could find no mention of
> Mark Lowes-Larter.
> A repeat of the story Carol?, or is it Highly classified?
I am afraid I am not at liberty to disclose that information..... sorry.
Carol
Suzi
Barry R wrote:
>
<kershcnippppp...>
> <Mode=*HINT*HINT*>
> *Nobody* got a photo, did they?
> </Mode>
>
> Oh good.
Mwahahahahahahahaha.....
Ahem... better now... just waiting to see what develops (IYSWIM <g>)