dinosaurs and knights w/chickens
jpol...@eagle.wesleyan.edu
armor and carrying a chicken would walk across the stage and hit someone with
the chicken? I mean, was this just something else dreamed up in the distorted
Python world, or does it actually have meaning?
Also, there was a sketch with a woman(Cleese) presenting a theory about
dinosaurs that said that they're skinny on one end, fat in the middle, etc....
Right after she finishes her explanation, the other person(Gilliam?) says
"That's it?" and then I never got to see what came after 'cause my VCR broke.
Does anyone know how the sketch finished?
001
>Also, there was a sketch with a woman(Cleese) presenting a theory about
>dinosaurs that said that they're skinny on one end, fat in the middle, etc....
>Right after she finishes her explanation, the other person(Gilliam?) says
>"That's it?" and then I never got to see what came after 'cause my VCR broke.
>Does anyone know how the sketch finished?
>
>Jpol...@eagle.wesleyan.edu
The sketch you're referring to is "Anne Elk." It ends something like this..
(C)hapman : That's it,is it?
(Cl)eese: Yes,Chris.
(C): Well,you've seemed to hit the nail on the head!
(Cl): And it's mine.
(C): Thank you for coming along to the studio.
(Cl): Thank you...
(C): This week,Britain's newest wasp farm opened...
(Cl): ..it's been a lot of fun...
(C): ..yes..opened..to a...
(Cl): ..saying what my theory is....
(C): ..yes,thank you!...
(Cl): ...and whose it is...
........and from here,Cleese continues to interrupt until an exasperated
Chapman threatens to call the police(or on the record version... threatens
to shoot her.
*************************************************************
? "How long is it? " ?
? "That's a bit of a personal question,Sir!" - mpfc.(lifeboat.) ?
*************************************************************
Joseph Acosta
>dinosaurs that said that they're skinny on one end, fat in the middle, etc....
>Right after she finishes her explanation, the other person(Gilliam?) says
>"That's it?" and then I never got to see what came after 'cause my VCR broke.
>Does anyone know how the sketch finished?
>
>Jpol...@eagle.wesleyan.edu
I believe the lady's name who has the theory is called "Anne Elk" .
more or less quotes
"Sitting next to me is Anne Elk....Ahhhhh"
[...]
my theory is that there're skinyy on one end fat in the middle .....
Well I believe you have hit the nail on the head !
I have another theory.....mumble..muble mumble
SHUT UP !
my theory is.....
SHUT UP !
mumble muble muble ...\
Look if don;t shut up I will have to shoot you !!
ahhgm ...mumble mumble......
BANG...BANG...BANG....
my other theory is .......
Machine gun noises and bomb noises etc.
end of schetch.
This is the best that I can remember it from my vague recollection...
corrections or additions are welcome !
Joe Acosta
Francis Stracke
>In article <1990Dec4.2...@eagle.wesleyan.edu> jpol...@eagle.wesleyan.edu writes:
>>Also, there was a sketch with a woman(Cleese) presenting a theory about
>>dinosaurs that said that they're skinny on one end, fat in the middle, etc....
Okay, here's the script, taken from _All the Words_ (no flames, please):
Presenter (GRAHAM): Good evening.
CAPTION: 'THRUST--A QUITE CONTROVERSIAL LOOK AT THE WORLD AROUND US'
Presenter: I have with me tonight Anne Elk. Mrs Anne Elk.
Miss Elk (JOHN): Miss.
SUPERIMPOSED CAPTION: 'ANNE ELK'
Presenter: You have a new theory about brontosauruses.
Miss Elk: Can I just say here Chris for one moment that I have a new theory
about the brontosauruses.
Presenter: Exactly. [He gestures but she does not say anything] What is it?
Miss Elk: Where? [looks round]
Presenter: No, no your new theory.
Miss Elk: Oh, what is my theory?
Presenter: Yes.
Miss Elk: Oh what is my theory that it is. Well Chris you may well ask me
what is my theory.
Presenter: I *am* asking.
Miss Elk: Good for you. My word yes. Well Chris, what is it that it is--
this theory of mine. Well, this is what it is--my theory that I
have, that is to say, which is mine, is mine.
Presenter [beginning to show signs of exasperation]: Yes, I know it's yours,
what is it?
Miss Elk: Where? Oh, what is my theory? This is it. [clears throat at some
length] My theory that belongs to me is as follows. [clears throat
at some great length] This is how it goes. The next thing I'm going
to say is my theory. Ready?
Presenter: Yes.
Miss Elk: My theory by A. Elk. Brackets Miss, brackets. This theory goes
as follows and begins now. All brontosauruses are thin at one end,
much much thicker in the middle and then thin again at the far end.
That is my theory, it is mine, and belongs to me and I own it, and
what it is too.
Presenter: That's *it*, is it?
Miss Elk: Spot on, Chris.
Presenter: Well, er, this theory of yours appears to have hit the nail on
the head.
Miss Elk: And it's mine.
Presenter: Yes, thank you very much for coming along to the studio. Thank you.
Miss Elk: My pleasure, Chris...
Presenter: Next week Britain's newest wasp farm...
Miss Elk: It's been a lot of fun.
Presenter: Yes, thank you very much.
Miss Elk: Saying what my theory is.
Presenter: Yes, thank you.
Miss Elk: And whose it is.
Presenter: Yes, thank you--that's all--thank you...opens next week.
Miss Elk: I have another theory.
Presenter: Yes.
Miss Elk: Called my second theory, or theory number two.
Presenter: Thank you. Britain's newest wasp farm...
Miss Elk: This second theory which was the one that I had said...
Presenter: [the phone rings; he answers] Yes, no I'm tryhing...
Miss Elk: Which I could expound without doubt. This second theory
which, with the one which I have said, forms the brace of
theories which I own and which belong to me, goes like this...
Presenter [looking at his shoe] nine and a half, wide fitting... Balleys of
Bond Street. What? No, sort of brogue.
Miss Elk: This is what it is. [clears throat]
Presenter: Eight and a half.
Miss Elk: This is it... [lots of noisy throat clearing]
[He rises and leaves the set to go next door to the travel agent
set, leaving Miss Elk behind for a moment. Bounder is still on
the phone. His other phone rings; he answers it.]
Bounder: Hello, yes...yes...
[The presenter enters the travel set. The tourist is still
droning on as before and Bounder is still on the phone.]
Tourist [carrying on all through the scene below]...and the Spanish
Tourist Board promises you that the raging cholera epidemic is
merely a case of mild Spanish tummy, like the last outbreak
of Spanish tummy in 1660 which killed half London and decimated
Europe, and meanwhile the bloody Guardia are busy arresting sixteen-
year-olds for kissing in the streets and shooting anyone under
nineteen who doesn't like Franco...
[The presenter approaches Bounder]
Presenter: The fire brigade are here. They're coming!
Bounder: Hello! No, no, no I think they're all part of the British Shoe
Corporation now.
[Miss Elk follows the presenter in.]
Miss Elk: Chris, this other theory of mine which is mine like the other
one I also own. The second theory...
[The fire brigade enter and the secretary goes to greet them. They
speak to her and she takes off her shoe to check the size.
Meanwhile...]
Miss Elk: My second theory states that fire brigade choirs seldom sing
songs about Marcel Proust.
[With only a half-beat pause the fire brigade starts singing
the Proust song. After the usual number of lines we hear the
gong.]
Voice Over (ERIC): Start again.
[The loony looks into the scene on overlay and waves at the
camera just as we fade to black. We hold black for a few
seconds and then the loony leans in to the black and waves
again before fading away.]
END OF EPISODE.
| Francis Stracke | My opinions are my own. I don't steal them.|
| Department of Mathematics |=============================================|
| University of Chicago | Until you stalk and overrun, |
| fra...@zaphod.uchicago.edu | you can't devour anyone. -- Hobbes |
Mr David Morning
>armor and carrying a chicken would walk across the stage and hit someone with
>the chicken? I mean, was this just something else dreamed up in the distorted
>Python world, or does it actually have meaning?
No meaning at all. Just weird.
>
>Also, there was a sketch with a woman(Cleese) presenting a theory about
>dinosaurs that said that they're skinny on one end, fat in the middle, etc....
>Right after she finishes her explanation, the other person(Gilliam?) says
>"That's it?" and then I never got to see what came after 'cause my VCR broke.
>Does anyone know how the sketch finished?
This was the Anne Elk (NO NOT an Elk!) sketch.
After he says That's it he tells her she's hit the nail on the head and then
attempts to introduce an article on Britain's newest wasp farm.
She continually interrupts him telling him how much fun it had been explaining
her theory.
She then tries to tell him she has another theory.
He tells her to shut-up.
She persists withtelling her theory anyway.
He tells her he will shoot her if she doesn't shut-up.
She persists.
He fires a single shot.
She continues.
There is then the sound of machine-gun fire
The end,
Dave.
David Van Hemel
>In article <1990Dec4.2...@eagle.wesleyan.edu> jpol...@eagle.wesleyan.edu writes:
>>Does anyone know why, in certain flying circus sketches, a knight dressed in
>>armor and carrying a chicken would walk across the stage and hit someone with
>>the chicken? I mean, was this just something else dreamed up in the distorted
>>Python world, or does it actually have meaning?
>
>No meaning at all. Just weird.
It says in the First 20(0) Years of Monty Python (and I paraphrase, not copy
words, and this is only a small part of one chapter) that the knight with
the chicken was used to end sketches that they could find no way to end
gracefully. It's along the same lines as the 16-ton weight or people
exploding or the foot from the titles coming down on people... just
necessary to keep sketches from going on too long. Graham also said this
sort of ending was a protest against people who talk too much.
--
__________________________________________________________
David A. Van Hemel | "The meaning of life
INTERNET: | is that it stops"
vanh...@eniac.seas.upenn.edu | --Kafka