a little courtroom humor

6 views
Skip to first unread message

a425couple

unread,
May 8, 2021, 10:55:11 AMMay 8
to
93.7 B-93 is with Connie Francis Myers and
2 others
JauctlgSnfuafnpory l5,hdngso 2g0gairec2e0d ·

-Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they
aren't prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first
witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her
and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do
know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and
frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on
your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their
backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to
realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper
pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across
the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He
can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is
one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his
wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know
him.'

The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very
quiet voice, said,
'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to
the electric chair.'

Gernot Hassenpflug

unread,
May 11, 2021, 11:16:23 PMMay 11
to
Now that made my Wednesday!!
+1
--
NNTP on Emacs 25.2 from Windows 7

a425couple

unread,
May 12, 2021, 12:46:15 PMMay 12
to
On 5/11/2021 8:16 PM, Gernot Hassenpflug wrote:
> a425couple <a425c...@hotmail.com> writes:
>
>> 93.7 B-93 is with Connie Francis Myers and
>> 2 others
>> JauctlgSnfuafnpory l5,hdngso 2g0gairec2e0d ·
>>
>> -Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they
>> aren't prepared for the answer.
>>
-----------------------
>> 'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both
>> to the electric chair.'
>
> Now that made my Wednesday!!
> +1
>
I am glad to read that someone liked it.

Lynn McGuire

unread,
May 12, 2021, 11:01:42 PMMay 12
to
Me too !

Lynn


Reply all
Reply to author
Forward
0 new messages