The consequences of Zoogz's bad attitude
Greg Henry
I remember back around '96 when the majority of people on this group at the time
campaigned to get you thrown off of AOL. People like Frank and yourself and
reassured me about my "bad attitude".
-g
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo
- 47, and no recreational drugs, ever. Not even a joint or a can of beer. I
wanted full control of my head, and I've done just that;
- Maintained a groovy, low-budget avant-rock band for 27 years of my adult
life;
- Did a major U.S. tour in 1986;
- Was INVITED to do two major European tours, one in 1988 and 1990;
- Somehow managed to compose a massive body of musical work---some of it good,
some of it bad, all of it MY OWN, with practically no help whatsoever from
almost anybody. 37 albums---count 'em---37...do I hear 38?;
- Managed to live almost my entire adult life WITHOUT WORKING AT A NORMAL
JOB---a few things here and there, phone sales, typesetting, but I've somehow
worked my way through with music (and my good looks);
- Had a son who, to this day, I'm extremely proud of (turns 18 in November);
- Made some loyal friends along the way, like Richie Hass, John Trubee, and Joe
Newman, just to name a few;
- Had steady access to PUSSY since I was 16......;
- Fulfilled a lifetime dream of wanting to be in the pro wrestling business---I
was Executive Vice President of the UWF (Universal Wrestling Federation, now
defunkt because the promoter overdosed on cocaine and died), which, at the
time, was a weekly show on Sports Channel America and Prime Ticket, with
syndication in 27 countries---Not to mention being the manager/peerformer of
The Warlord, Dr. Death Steve Williams, Cactus Jack, Mr. Outrageous, and more;
- Making aquaintance with Hulk Hogan, who, incidentally, is a big fan of my
music;
- Touring the Pacific Rim to promote the licensing of UWF videos (Singapore,
Malaysia, Thailand, then Japan);
- Made a lot of friends here on the internet (hard to believe, I know);
- I cheated death when I survived a major heart attack last year, and
subsequent 6-hour quadruple by-pass surgery, which the surgeon gave me only a
30% chance of surviving. It's been a tough road back (partial paralysis still
persists, unfortunately), but dammit, I AM back, and will continue, one way or
another;
- I have a girlfriend who loves me and takes good care of me;
- I still have most of my teeth!
I'm sure there're more things that my bad attitude has brought me, but that's
enough for now. Is it all over? OF COURSE NOT! But man, life sure has thrown
me the kitchen sink in terms of unnecessary obstacles (could my contemporaries,
whom we need not mention by name, have fared as well under the same hardships?
I wonder.....), with the onslaught of blindness being the most current villian.
But like all previous battles, I'll beat this one too, and continue to live in
my own dimension, somewhere away from nowhere.
--ZRTLM
http://www.zoogzrift.com/
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo
>Date: 6/7/00 3:46 PM Pacific Daylight Time
>Message-id: <393ED0BA...@greghenry.com>
Thank you. Kill 'em! ;)
--ZRTLM
http://www.zoogzrift.com/
Jeff Szarka
wrote:
>Godspeed Zoogs Rift!
>
>I remember back around '96 when the majority of people on this group at the time
>campaigned to get you thrown off of AOL. People like Frank and yourself and
>reassured me about my "bad attitude".
>
>-g
I look at it this way... bad or good... either is better than nothing
and *SO* many people these days lack any opinions, any real feelings
or interset in anything other than TV and lawn care.
David Blumenstein
Right -- I'm never mowing the lawn again.
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo
>Date: 6/8/00 7:01 PM Pacific Daylight Time
>Message-id: <39404EEC...@comeracing.com>
One of my favorite Rudy Schwartz Project song titles is Joe Newman's NICE LAWN,
ASSHOLE
--ZRTLM
http://www.zoogzrift.com/
Geir Corneliussen
>
> Man, I really fucked myself up!
>
> - 47, and no recreational drugs, ever. Not even a joint or a can of beer. I
> wanted full control of my head, and I've done just that;
One thing I like about you is that you are as painfully honest and
therefor stupid...as myself. Or Zappa for that matter. What I mean
is...why bother? Why care about silly details? It's what you are and
what you do as a whole and how well you make it...that really matters.
The whole thang. And everyone knows that when you get your ass out and
get things done, things also go wrong. *I* have done so many dumb thing
I am out of count. But I have gotten things done, and that's the point.
The dead people that sit there and try to judge, should try to do
something close to as creative and good for this miserable world as you
have. They should tried. But since they do _nothing_ but complain, they
are doomed to just sit there and complain.
--
Geir Corneliussen
_______________FLFFZL_____________
http://www.friendlylittlefinger.com
"If we can't be free, at least we can be cheap"
FZ
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo
>Date: 6/9/00 10:58 AM Pacific Daylight Time
>Message-id: <394130...@online.no>
>
>Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo wrote:
>>
>> Man, I really fucked myself up!
>>
>> - 47, and no recreational drugs, ever. Not even a joint or a can of beer.
>I
>> wanted full control of my head, and I've done just that;
>
>One thing I like about you is that you are as painfully honest and
>therefor stupid...as myself. Or Zappa for that matter. What I mean
>is...why bother? Why care about silly details? It's what you are and
>what you do as a whole and how well you make it...that really matters.
>The whole thang. And everyone knows that when you get your ass out and
>get things done, things also go wrong. *I* have done so many dumb thing
>I am out of count. But I have gotten things done, and that's the point.
>The dead people that sit there and try to judge, should try to do
>something close to as creative and good for this miserable world as you
>have. They should tried. But since they do _nothing_ but complain, they
>are doomed to just sit there and complain.
I was just telling Pat Neve on the phone a little while ago that I knew when I
posted that post that I was just asking for it---sarcastic "Oh Zoogz you're so
great," and a basic "ho-hum, Zoogz is bragging about himself again."
I posted that post because it was suggested by someone in another thread that
after all I've done, I've essentially wound up at the same place that I
started. Nothing could be farther from the truth, and, in my own defense, I
felt a need to set the record straight.
And you're right---we honest people of the world ARE stupid---because we're
sheep in a world of wolves. But without us, the world would eventually devour
itself in it's own amorality.
As I remember somebody or another saying---I'M TOTALLY UNREPENTANT...
--ZRTLM
http://www.zoogzrift.com/
John Hopkins
[--]
> I'm sure there're more things that my bad attitude has brought me, but
that's
> enough for now. Is it all over? OF COURSE NOT! But man, life sure has
thrown
> me the kitchen sink in terms of unnecessary obstacles (could my
contemporaries,
> whom we need not mention by name, have fared as well under the same
hardships?
> I wonder.....), with the onslaught of blindness being the most current
villian.
> But like all previous battles, I'll beat this one too, and continue to
live in
> my own dimension, somewhere away from nowhere.
Has the recent news about progress in diabetes treatments (aka a possible
cure) brightened your prospects at all?
/John "fingers crossed" Darkhop
Nanochrist
LAWN,
> ASSHOLE
>
> --ZRTLM
> http://www.zoogzrift.com/
>
Um... Does that mean he's got CDs other than "Gunther Packs a Stiffy?"
'Cause if so, I want.
-Mike Bryant
www.nanochrist.com
John Scialli
Liquid Moamo) wrote:
>He sure does! And they're all fucking GREAT---as is Joe himself. You can email
>him for more specific info on how to get these terrific cd's.
>
>Well, you could, if I remembered his email address! (sorry about that)
>
>I'll call him over the weekend and get it for you.
>
>--ZRTLM
>http://www.zoogzrift.com/
Joe is gun...@teleport.com
"Enhanced Florence Henderson" (cassette only
I think) makes me weep for joy just thinking of it.
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo
>Date: 6/9/00 5:41 PM Pacific Daylight Time
>Message-id: <8hs2rb$o...@journal.concentric.net>
Thanks for suggesting it, but believe me, I've already looked into all of this
new stuff, and, sadly, none of it works on diabetics! Pretty damn irritating.
I want to be like Ray Milland and look at women through their clothing. Zoogz
"Mr. Mentallo" Rift!
--ZRTLM
http://www.zoogzrift.com/
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo
Hoodoo
Liquid Moamo) wrote:
>I posted that post because it was suggested by someone in another thread that
>after all I've done, I've essentially wound up at the same place that I
>started. Nothing could be farther from the truth, and, in my own defense, I
>felt a need to set the record straight.
Reading your previous post is what made me remember your birthday,
even though I was a month early. I rather liked your message that set
the record straight.
>And you're right---we honest people of the world ARE stupid---because we're
>sheep in a world of wolves. But without us, the world would eventually devour
>itself in it's own amorality.
Good point; something I personally believe in.
John Hopkins
news:20000610013037...@ng-fq1.aol.com...
> >Has the recent news about progress in diabetes treatments (aka a possible
> >cure) brightened your prospects at all?
> Thanks for suggesting it, but believe me, I've already looked into all of
this
> new stuff, and, sadly, none of it works on diabetics! Pretty damn
irritating.
I don't remember if you have type I or II diabetes (I'm a I m'self), but us
I's got some cheery news recently, as in the possibility that shooting
insulin could soon be a thing of the past. They've had some test cases
trying some kind of pill for the last year or so, one of whom used to shoot
up four times a day, and 90% of the subjects were able to maintain their
glucose balance this way -- basically, except for taking these pills twice a
day, they became normal (so to speak) people again, able to eat anything
they want without sending their blood sugar screaming out of control.
In other words, for the first time in my life I want to sign up for medical
experiments. Although blindness isn't threatening me *at the moment*, I'm
still at risk for it and understand why, since if I go too far below or
above the proper blood sugar level my vision gets worse.
> I want to be like Ray Milland and look at women through their clothing.
Zoogz
> "Mr. Mentallo" Rift!
Right now I'd settle for being able to see through boxes. Trying to get my
midi studio set up again and all I'm missing are three patch cords and a
power adapter......
>
> --ZRTLM
> http://www.zoogzrift.com/
/John
Geir Corneliussen
I have had projects going that didn't made it. Like 8 yers ago, I put up
a goddamn printingstore in the basement. I had just bought the house,
and was full of wild odeas. So I contacted a local mechanical workshop,
and told them to build a litographic press printing machine. It should
be THIS big, that meant as big as my dorr, in order to get it in. I
weighted about a ton, and it costed me about 10 000 dollars. Then I
bought stones to print on. I contacted the german people down in
Solhofer, the only human beeings left that still made them stones to
print on. I ordered six stones and gave them 5 000 bucks. And I hired a
very old guy, that learnt me how to print. This particular printing
process is about 300 years ols, and was used for printing labels for use
on Norwegian canned sardines up to the late 50's. But it's a well known
for printing original artworks by skilled artists. So I paid him some
more...And I started to print litographs, but after a while I found out
it was just too much hazle and I had to do my regular job to get them
real bucks. So this was a mistake. But this summer my brother came over,
and he know the process from his experience with printing litographs for
local artists down at the only place on the westcoast with such a
printingcapability. So I said he could use my basement whatever he
liked since it was just standing there. And now I hear those two dudes
printing down there every day. My bother and his assistant. My broter is
a professional artist, and this other person is the guy that finish his
works. So now I see that my 8 year old mistake is no longer a mistake,
but like a thing beyond its time. And when the money comes back in, he
might pay me back what I spendt on this equipment. And things will be
fine. I have put money into a load of things, but many things didn't
made it. But I continue, since I am a freelancer and this is my way to
do it. I try things I think has potential. I push in some money. I try
to make it grow. This is me, and if it don't work, then fuck it. Some
that just go to a regular job day after day, don't understand this. But
I don't and have close to never had a regular job, so I just do whatever
I feel is right. And I try to sell things nobody really want in the
first place. So I take a load of chances. And if it don't work I don't
give a damn. Money is just a tool. And a tool is a stupid thing that use
to go kaputt every so often. Like me. I went to town last night and met
a beautiful woman, but then I got frunk and spoiled it all. Maybe she
will give me a call or I meet her some other time? But life is long and
full of sillyness so I don't really care. I got my goals, I try things
out, I do a load of mistakes. I fail a lot. I hear the complaints from
people. But that's the way it is. What makes this way of life all worth
it, is simply that when I get it right....It really is so damn fuckin'
good and so many people think it was super and that is all I need to
know. And I can continue like the madman I am, with other chances, other
projects. Will they make it? Well, I don't care. That's one very
important thing to have. The finger. Show the world the finger.
We are all gonna die sometime, so why worry? We'll all end up in the
same lame place as everyone else in any case. Regardless of belief or
anything. You be a muslim or a christan or into something other odd
piss. I'll tellya: We are all going to the same place in any case, so
why worry? Get yer ass out of the closet and do whatever you want to.
Unless you are a serialkiller of course...................
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo
>Date: 6/10/00 8:14 AM Pacific Daylight Time
>Message-id: <39425B...@online.no>
>
Get yer ass out of the closet and do whatever you want to.
>
>Unless you are a serialkiller of course...................
Judging the moral value system (or lack thereof) demonstrated, I'd say that
most of the human race are potential serial killers.
uh......kill 'em! ha ha
--ZRTLM
http://www.zoogzrift.com/
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo
>Date: 6/10/00 5:03 AM Pacific Daylight Time
>Message-id: <8htapp$f...@chronicle.concentric.net>
>
>Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo <liqui...@aol.comSCI> wrote in message
>news:20000610013037...@ng-fq1.aol.com...
>
>> >Has the recent news about progress in diabetes treatments (aka a possible
>> >cure) brightened your prospects at all?
>
>> Thanks for suggesting it, but believe me, I've already looked into all of
>this
>> new stuff, and, sadly, none of it works on diabetics! Pretty damn
>irritating.
>
>I don't remember if you have type I or II diabetes (I'm a I m'self), but us
>I's got some cheery news recently, as in the possibility that shooting
>insulin could soon be a thing of the past.
I'm Type II, but I don't take insulin. I take a combination of various oral
medications, and they do the job for me (Precose, Glucophage & Glyburide) (this
is in addition to tons of other daily pills I take for high blood pressure,
PAIN, depression, etc.). The only period where I was shooting Insulin was
during (and somewhat after) my extended hospital stay last year. I'm fucking
lazy---I have a glucometer (for the uniniated---a little battery-operated
device that allows you to stick your finger, put a little blood on a plastic
tab, then insert the tab to keep an eye on your blood sugar levels throughout
the day), but I never use it. I hate the whole damn process, as well as my
entire health situation, and, seriously, I hope I die soon---I've lived long
enough, I think). This poverty alone, and constant need to depend on other
people and the government (I'm on SSI---which is next to worthless), neither of
whom give much of a shit if I live or die, is enough to make me say "to hell
with it" (or me?)... My son's grown up now, and I'm convinced he has it in him
to have a great adult life without any more help from his dad, so what the
fuck.
> They've had some test cases
>trying some kind of pill for the last year or so, one of whom used to shoot
>up four times a day, and 90% of the subjects were able to maintain their
>glucose balance this way -- basically, except for taking these pills twice a
>day, they became normal (so to speak) people again, able to eat anything
>they want without sending their blood sugar screaming out of control.
>
That's me. I take pills 4 times a day, and my sugal level is generally a
steady 75 to 120. HOWEVER, I do get fairly frequent unexpected sugar plunges
(these drugs are strong stuff!), so I always carry a container of glucose
tablets in my pocket, to insure that I don't quickly wind up in a coma...being
a diabetic is a fucking NIGHTMARE (I'm fighting constant ingrown toenails now,
too, (including periodic infections) which put me at high risk of eventual
amputation). [sigh]
>In other words, for the first time in my life I want to sign up for medical
>experiments. Although blindness isn't threatening me *at the moment*, I'm
>still at risk for it and understand why, since if I go too far below or
>above the proper blood sugar level my vision gets worse.
>
Tell your doctor you want to try some of these medications (you CAN take the
pills while you still continue to experiment with tapering down on the
insulin), and give it a shot (uh, no pun intended---ha ha). If he doesn't
think they'll work for you, he might be right (Tom Brown is a Type I diabetic,
and the pills don't work on him, unfortunately), but I'd still get a second, or
even third, opinion. Try getting an opinion fron an Endocrinologist (I'm sure
DR. SCIALLI will correct my spelling on this!!!.....), a diabetes specialist.
Man, I wish you luck on that. The shots are essentially nothing (not like most
"civilians" think they are--even though they're these BIG, LONGGGG NEEDLES THAT
YOU HAVE TO CRAM INTO YOUR ABDOMEN OR LEG 20 TIMES A DAY, AND THEY'RE EXTREMELY
PAINFUL AND CAUSE A LOT OF INTERNAL AND EXTERNAL BLEEDING---IT'S A DISGUSTING
MESS! But then again, I kind of like it), but it's still preferable to take
the pills instead, if possible.
>> I want to be like Ray Milland and look at women through their clothing.
>Zoogz
>> "Mr. Mentallo" Rift!
>
>Right now I'd settle for being able to see through boxes. Trying to get my
>midi studio set up again and all I'm missing are three patch cords and a
>power adapter......
The same with half of my cd's! Half of my Zappa collection is/are scattered in
various boxes stored at my ex-wife's apartment, and I have no idea where any of
this shit is anymore (way too much moving over the past years).
Kill 'em!
--ZRTLM
http://www.zoogzrift.com/
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo
>Date: 6/9/00 11:54 PM Pacific Daylight Time
>Message-id: <0ep3ksc988b2navvi...@4ax.com>
>
>On 10 Jun 2000 05:27:15 GMT, liqui...@aol.comSCI (Zoogz Rif--The
>"Enhanced Florence Henderson" (cassette only
>I think) makes me weep for joy just thinking of it.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
Joe did an entire album that he never even bothered releasing---all covers of
soundtrack themes from really shitty (uh, I mean cool---excuse me) movies like
Plan 9 From Outer Space and The Incredibly Strange whatever Steckler thang. It
kills me that Joe refuses to do music anymore, even for fun.
--ZRTLM
http://www.zoogzrift.com/
Hoodoo
Liquid Moamo) wrote:
>My other choice would be for them to just sit my dead corpse in my chair, turn
>the TV on TCM, and put a big box of Cheeze-It's in my lap. Maybe, after a
>while, they can put a bunch of hungry rats in the room to eat my stinking
>flesh, and make a video out of it and submit it to MTV so I can finally win the
>goddamn Grammy I've deserved all these years!
I couldn't do that; I wouldn't want to unleash evil mutated rats on
the rest of the world. Unless I could somehow train them to only
attack certain individuals or factions. Yeah, that's the ticket...
eMTyV would be good target for zombie-rats.
--
================
或螳或螳或螳或螳
ぉHoodooぉ
蠡蠡蠡蠡
Remove the obvious pest deterrent for personal replies.
John Hopkins
> >From: "John Hopkins" johnh...@darkhop.com
> >Date: 6/10/00 4:34 PM Pacific Daylight Time
> >Message-id: <8huj9h$b...@journal.concentric.net>
> >
> >> >I don't remember if you have type I or II diabetes (I'm a I m'self),
but
> >us
> >> >I's got some cheery news recently, as in the possibility that shooting
> >> >trying some kind of pill for the last year or so, one of whom used to
> >shoot
> >> >up four times a day, and 90% of the subjects were able to maintain
their
> >> >glucose balance this way -- basically, except for taking these pills
> >twice a
> >> >day, they became normal (so to speak) people again, able to eat
anything
> >> >they want without sending their blood sugar screaming out of control.
> >>
> >> http://dailynews.yahoo.com/h/nm/20000606/ts/health_diabetes_dc_1.html
> >>
> >> I read it with interest because several members of my family, and
> >> other people I know, have diabetes. Unfortunately, this new procedure
> >> may increase the risk of cancer and infection.
> >
> >Interesting article, especially the part that said they get these cells
from
> >cadavers. My love for the original Frankenstein movies are reinforced.
> >
> >"Whose brain did I put in?"
> >"Abby someone." -------------
>
>
>
> Now that you mention it, in Bride Of Frankenstein, ol' doc fart suggests
to the
> monster at the end, "No, not the lever! Don't pull the lever!" I never
> understood---why the fuck was that LEVER put there in the first place?
Seems
> kind of dumb, if you ask me! Were there levers in all the other rooms in
the
> castle as well? Finally, how might I go about installing one in my rented
room
> here? That would be cool! :P
Yep, and when he lets Dr. Frankenstein and his bride leave and tells Dr.
Pretorius to stay, the latter obligingly stays right there and lets himself
be blowed up.
--Although, if you look fast, you can see Colin Clive against the far wall
as the lab is blowing up. They didn't reshoot it after deciding to have a
happy ending.
>
> "You die, DEAD. *I* die, LIVE!"
> ---Lugosi as Igor, in Frankie III
>
>
> --ZRTLM
> http://www.zoogzrift.com/
SR Lewis
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo wrote:
> Or maybe they should just put the hungry rats in a room with the committee who
> decides the Grammy Awards in the first place...
then you would have died and gone to hebbin...!
--
Steve
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo
>Date: 6/12/00 2:58 AM Pacific Daylight Time
>Message-id: <8i2c7o$b...@journal.concentric.net>
Either that, or Colin just decided to run out of the castle REALLY FAST.
I'm sure that's it. He was a track star in college.
--ZRTLM
http://www.zoogzrift.com/
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo
>Date: 6/12/00 1:04 AM Pacific Daylight Time
>Message-id: <iu59ks0oo6rj83e2j...@4ax.com>
>
>
>>
>>> I want to be like Ray Milland and look at women through their clothing.
>>Zoogz
>>> "Mr. Mentallo" Rift!
>
>
>twelve with "crack in the world" which sucked by comparison.
>"run, lolitta run" was a bore. "frequency" was pretty good.
>
I wish I had a copy of PANIC IN THE YEAR ZERO...
--ZRTLM
http://www.zoogzrift.com/
Zoogz Rif--The Liquid Moamo
>Date: 6/12/00 7:23 AM Pacific Daylight Time
>Message-id: <3944F263...@stic.net>
...and Zappa would STILL hire some second-rate lead vocalists instead of me!
I'd end up as a janitor or something!
--ZRTLM
http://www.zoogzrift.com/
Sam and/or Karen Rouse
hoodooB...@newnorth.net (Hoodoo) wrote:
> That's why I suggest reading the book, The American Way of Death
> Revisted, by Jessica Mitford. Some of the things that go on behind
> closed doors are appalling (or funny, in another context). People hold
> the death of a loved one so sacred that they'd be shocked to learn of
> the occasional incompetence, indifference, and outright intentional
> misconduct within the funeral industry.
I just ordered a copy. I read Mitford's original book when I was in jr.
high (what attracted a 12-or-so-year-old to this book, I couldn't say),
and I remember it as a very funny, fact-filled, and infuriating book. I'm
looking forward to reading the updated version. (I seem to recall that
most of the chapter titles were pretty funny - is the one about
arrangements for viewing of the deceased still called "Remains To Be
Seen"?)
--
"The music becomes more and more abstract sounding
like a syncopated barnyard button factory."
- David Lynch, "Ronnie Rocket"
Hoodoo
Karen Rouse) wrote:
>I just ordered a copy. I read Mitford's original book when I was in jr.
>high (what attracted a 12-or-so-year-old to this book, I couldn't say),
>and I remember it as a very funny, fact-filled, and infuriating book. I'm
>looking forward to reading the updated version. (I seem to recall that
>most of the chapter titles were pretty funny - is the one about
>arrangements for viewing of the deceased still called "Remains To Be
>Seen"?)
I wish I'd known of the book years ago. Everything in it was stuff I
wasn't aware of and it was very enlightening. I lent my book to my
brother so I can't add or verify chapter titles right now, but, they
are as amusing as the one you mention.
Peter de B. Harrington
"Fast Frank :o{-" <jam...@joes.garage> wrote in message
news:0fdeks8ule97pagng...@4ax.com...
> On Mon, 12 Jun 2000 07:32:01 GMT, hoodooB...@newnorth.net
> (Hoodoo), ralphed:
>
> :>On Sun, 11 Jun 2000 21:31:35 -0400, Jeff <je...@asan.com> wrote:
> :>
> :>>glad to see you back in the group - hope all is not very unwell with
> :>>you also...
> :>
> :>I've been having my problems. I'm still around though and dealing with
> :>whatever comes along. Thanks for the comment.
>
> ...famous words of advice; don't sweat the petty things, pet the
> sweaty things. Works for me...sometimes. :o)
>
> FF :o{-
Good one, and remember the second part is that they are all sweaty things.
Pete
Geir Corneliussen
>
> On Sun, 11 Jun 2000 05:23:38 GMT, hoodooB...@newnorth.net
> (Hoodoo), ralphed:
>
> :>On 10 Jun 2000 18:14:58 GMT, liqui...@aol.comSCI (Zoogz Rif--The
> :>Liquid Moamo) wrote:
> :>
> :>>, and, seriously, I hope I die soon---I've lived long
> :>>enough, I think).
> :>
> :>Since you mentioned that; I have been investigating making
> :>arrangements for what happens to the mortal remains
> :>immediately after my own demise. I've been irresponsible about
> :>a lot of things during my life but my health ain't what it should be
> :>and the realization hit me that I should plan my last wishes for the
> :>inevitable time when I do depart. I don't have a target date, but,
> :>anything can happen so I may as well get my (dead) ducks in a
> :>row.
> :>
>
> *remainder of post respectfully snipped*
>
> ...I'm glad I saw this, cuz I need to have my will changed. When I was
> married I told my wife when I go that I wanted to be cremated and have
> her douche with a little part of me. I don't think her current
> significant other would appreciate the original intent of that
> request.
>
> Now, if I can just find the damn thing...
I want to be eaten by an African Tiger, so that my children will have
some exciting storys to tell my grandchildren and stuff. And I have
always said I do not want to be cremated, but just rot away. The dirt is
what creates new life. If me, shaped as a tigerpoop can grow a tree,
nothing would more fun. But if me is just cremated into carbon, I will
just be dust. One idea could be to make pencils of of it, and draw some
nice pictures. But I prefer the togerpoop tree thing. Another cool way
to die I heard out here some few months ago, was to be crushed by the
Zappa-recordcollection. That one was a beauty. Only a true fanatic can
make up something that silly. The very last appealing way to die, is to
be closed into a square room a thousand meters underground with no way
out. And die of dehydration and hunger. There are far more cheerish
ways. And just forget about the Tiger. I want to live as healthy and as
long as possible, THEN I will have all my broken parts replaced with
mechanical devices and be turned into a cybernetic mutant. Now, that's a
cool idea! That way I can live forever. Until I run out of fuel, of
course. Down on the highway. No geiroil left or anything. Maybe somebody
will pick up all the rusted parts one day, put me on display in some
kinda avantgarde art gallery, and, in a very important voice, say:
"He use to cut the grass, he was a lawnmover."
But really, it's just a bunch of rusted metal, and I try to cheat you
into buying this debris just for the hell of it. But this was not spoken
out loud. Because there were plentyful of dumbasses in the audience,
with plentiful of money. This he know, so he kept shut.
Nobody bought it anyway, so nevermind.
Hoodoo
wrote:
>...I'm glad I saw this, cuz I need to have my will changed. When I was
>married I told my wife when I go that I wanted to be cremated and have
>her douche with a little part of me. I don't think her current
>significant other would appreciate the original intent of that
>request.
Yeah, she now has some asshole in her ashhole! :)
>Now, if I can just find the damn thing...
Look in the last place you left it.
Hoodoo
wrote:
>...famous words of advice; don't sweat the petty things, pet the
>sweaty things. Works for me...sometimes. :o)
What about sweaty pets?
Hoodoo
wrote:
>:>Look in the last place you left it.
>
>...haven't gotten that far yet. :o)
No dummy, you're supposed to work in reverse chronological order.
[I know, the inclusion of the letter combination "logical" and
implementing its definition really throws you for a loop.] :)
Hoodoo
<jam...@hoodoos.garage> wrote:
>Hey, guess what? I are a collitch stoodunt! First day of school
>Monday. Maybe now I'll get some leg...ya think?
Cool! Never too late to learn.
This isn't some prerequisite for that job at NASA you wanted, is it?
The one where you said you wanted to "take up space"?
Hoodoo
wrote:
>...you must be thinking of the time I tried to donate my body to
>science fiction.
So you were what the creators of the inverted ice cream cone were
trying to replicate in that movie. Cool....
>...oh shit! That's something else I gotta change in my will!!
Only if you've got the will to do it. <guffaw>