List for Tuesday November 11
JZA
'Actual Items', Ice T, 'The Cursed Camera', Jenna Elfman,The Strokes
Question of the Week #Stopped By Whom or What?
What happened to Rosie O'Donnell?
My Take on Conan's Tuesday Suit:
One of 3M's PPSD guys when the German tech folk come
for a visit.
Best Monologue Joke - Tuesday:
It's Veteran's Day (I had the day off!) and George Dubya
honored the day as he always does, "He locked himslef in the
Oval Office and watched Nick-at-Night's 'Gomer Pyle' marathon."
Other Best Monologue Joke - Tuesday:
Women sued a California seafood restaurant over a condom
in the clam chowder, "Even worse, the waiter was still wearing it."
Best Return:
Conan's Anna Nicole Smith impression.
Best Monologue Joke - Tuesday:
Justin Guarini being sued by a couple claiming he rammed his
car into back of their car, "When he heard, you could be sued for
ramming someone from behind, Clay Aikin fled the country."
Best Bet:
The 'retarded' guy copying Conan at the airport was at the
NYC airport, not the Canadian airport.
Worst Distraction:
Larry Flynt purchased nude photos of Jessica Lynch, was
going to publish them in his magazine but after public outcry,
decided not to. This irritates Max, he rants, "Shame on you!
Relase those photos!"
However, during Max's speech for porn and the American
way, I kept thinking about how James Wormworth would
have done it.
Best 'Actual Items':
- Toledo ad for kid's rocking zebra, "Watch your toddler pretend
to outrun African poachers."
- Daytona Beach ad for a sofa, "Overstuffed and draped in denim,
just like your trailer trash wife."
- Tucson ad for men's underwear, "Look great at Clay Aiken's
pool party."
- Eugene ad for photo developing, "Relive the morning your
daughter draunk five shots of whiskey,"
Best Hat:
Ice T
Least Likely Runway Model:
Ice T. I could actually see Conan doing it, but not Ice T.
Best Clothing Philosophy:
Ice T, "There's two types of looks out there. You got like
the Abercrombie and Finch look, that's like 'let's look like
a bum'. I'm not with that, you know what I'm saying. I want
to look sharp. I'm from the ghetto, I ain't never had nothing
I want to look like I've got something."
Best Kind of Street Cred
Ice T told Conan that he already had 'street cred', "People
love you man, on the street they love you."
Conan didn't quite believe him. I believe Ice T but only if
he's talking about Toronto street cred, and that's the best kind.
Best New Beverage:
Ice T has an energy drink called 'Liquid Ice'.
Best Sign Language:
Ice T showing how Liquid Ice works.
Best Ad Tag Line:
Ice T for Liquid Ice, "It gives you stamina for whatever game
you're about to indulge in."
Best Guest Answer:
Ice T, re: Liquid Ice, "This stuff tastes good."
Conan, "What does it taste like?"
Ice T, "Tastes good."
Best New Look:
Conan in Ice T's hat. Looked very much a Westie.
Best Guest Line #Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill:
Ice T on his other beverage, Royal Ice, a malt liquor, "It gets
you drunk real quick."
Least Likely Ice Tea Spokesperson:
Ice T
Best Guest Answer #Mike Tyson:
Conan, re: George Foreman selling Foreman Grills, "You
look at the way Foreman sells those grills and he's been on
the show many times and I love the guy - he smiles constantly.
Could you do that? If you had to could you just smile all the
time and would people buy it?"
Ice T, "It think when you're as big as George Foreman you got
to smile alot just to make people feel comfortable around you."
Best Suggestion for the Minnesota DOC:
Putting video games in prisons. According to Ice T, it will make
the time fly for those incarcerated.
Best Guest Answer #Especially If Driven By P Diddly:
Conan brought up P. DiddlyWop running the NYC marathon
and asked Ice T if he would ever do it. Ice T answered that he
used to run 12 miles a day when he was in the military, "But
now I probably could run a couple miles but I'd carjack
somebody before 26 miles."
Best Real Blooper:
At the end of Ice T's segment, Conan plugged the 100th episode
of 'Law and Order: SUV' and at the start of the next segment,
corrected himself and added that 'Law and Order: SUV', "Which
is a show where a four-wheel drive vehicle is brough to justice."
Anybody remember when the show used to 'manufacture' bloopers?
Worst Dressed Guest:
Jenna Elfman. Sometimes the 'lingerie' dress works but this is
time it doesn't.
Best Thing Left Unmentioned:
Jenna Elfman said she grew five inches in one year.
Isn't Conan's record nine inches in one year? He saidthis on the
show once.
Conan's Oddest Line:
Jenna Elfman, re: growth spurts, "Everything grew, like 'whooo'."
Conan, "Oh, okay down there too."
Elfman meant her breasts but who knows what Conan was thinking
about.
Best Repeat:
Conan finally got around to repeating the story about growing a
foot in a year all in his legs.
Best Guest Line #Agreement:
Conan, re: high school experiences, "I think my situation was
worse than your situation."
Jenna Elfman, "Sounds like it."
Worst Correlation:
They had a clip from 'Looney Tunes Back in Action', which
looks like a ripoff of 'Who Framed Roger Rabbit?'
Best Mystery:
Tuesday - Conan walking over the furniture and then looking like
he had places to go, people to see as soon as things wrapped up.
And then he invited La Bamba to come out from behind the podium
as if to join him center stage to do something special but La Bamba
just walked out.
What did Conan say? What was the deal with La Bamba just leaving?
Lord Hypnos
Mr. & Mrs. Zambesi
> Question of the Week #Stopped By Whom or What?
> What happened to Rosie O'Donnell?
Breast cancer.
> Best New Beverage:
> Ice T has an energy drink called 'Liquid Ice'.
Isn't that called water?
> Conan's Oddest Line:
> Jenna Elfman, re: growth spurts, "Everything grew, like 'whooo'."
> Conan, "Oh, okay down there too."
> Elfman meant her breasts but who knows what Conan was thinking
> about.
She's a tranny. Didn't you know?
Christian
--
"Ich habe dich herausgefunden."
- Jojo
wiggie
> Jean wrote:
>
> > Question of the Week #Stopped By Whom or What?
> > What happened to Rosie O'Donnell?
>
> Breast cancer.
>
> > Best New Beverage:
> > Ice T has an energy drink called 'Liquid Ice'.
>
> Isn't that called water?
Nope. Though it's close.
-Brian
wigg...@yahoo.ca
Mr. & Mrs. Zambesi
>> Isn't that called water?
>
> Nope. Though it's close.
I am very much interested in your detailed explanation of the differences.
Christian
--
"You're all grown up and you can't read and you decide not to tell anybody.
Well good... Because I don't like hearing about it. It's boring!"