My ER adventure

[Richard R. Hershberger]

So, last night the four-year old manages to break her liquid-filled
toy baton and drink some of the contents. Just water, right? You
would think so. But it had a distinct hydrocarbon odor to it, and she
started having labored breathing. My German Lutheran heritage teaches
me that I only go to the ER if I am actually in cardiac arrest. If
the heart attack is passed, that's what aspirin is for. But my German
Lutheran blood is thinned in my kids. This is what comes from
marrying an Italian Catholic. So off the kid and I go to the
hospital. Credit where credit is due: words like "ingested unknown
liquid" and "respiratory distress" got us into a treatment room fast.
After mulling things over and calling a poison center, the conclusion
is that the liquid probably started out as just water, but the plastic
glitter leached out some volatile hydrocarbons. By the time we saw an
actual doctor the kid was breathing normally. They gave her a cup of
apple juice and a package of chocolate pudding. Everything stayed
where it was supposed to, so we went home with instructions to see our
family doctor. The wife took the kid there today. Our doctor
harrumphed at the standard of care, but decided that if anything was
going to happen, it would have already. So a good time was had by
all. And the kid got apple juice and pudding, for just the price of
the co-pay. She also was in her "adorable" mode, and so charmed the
ER staff. And I blew up two latex gloves for her. So what we have
learned from the experience is not to drink "baton water", and "glove
balloons" are funny.

Richard R. Hershberger

[Tara]

On Tue, 31 Jul 2012 14:03:45 -0700 (PDT), "Richard R. Hershberger"
<rrh...@acme.com> wrote:

> So a good time was had by all. And the kid got apple juice and pudding, for just the price of
>the co-pay. She also was in her "adorable" mode, and so charmed the
>ER staff. And I blew up two latex gloves for her. So what we have
>learned from the experience is not to drink "baton water", and "glove
>balloons" are funny.
>

How scary. I'm glad everything turned out okay. That will be the
most expensive pudding, apple juice, and glove balloons you ever see.

Tara

[Tim Wright]

Now it is just a matter of waiting for the glittery poop to show up.


--

Tim W

[M C Hamster]

On Tue, 31 Jul 2012 16:19:15 -0500, Tim Wright <tlwri...@gmail.com>
wrote:

I hope that parents are not checking out the poop of their
four-year-olds these days. I mean, enough is enough.

You didn't get it from Dairy Queen, I assume.
http://www.cpsc.gov/cpscpub/prerel/prhtml97/97054.html
No reports of poisoned liquid, but some of choking hazards.
--

"Big Wheel Keep on Turnin'" -- Creedence Clearwater Revival

[Les Albert]

On Tue, 31 Jul 2012 14:03:45 -0700 (PDT), "Richard R. Hershberger"
<rrh...@acme.com> wrote:

Not fair!! The kid needs a new liquid filled toy baton!

Les

[Joseph Nebus]

In <0d66138b-5304-4470...@c11g2000yqb.googlegroups.com> "Richard R. Hershberger" <rrh...@acme.com> writes:

> So a good time was had by
>all. And the kid got apple juice and pudding, for just the price of
>the co-pay.

When I get around to writing a book of modern fairy tales,
that shall take the place of ``lived happily ever after'' for at least
one of them.

> She also was in her "adorable" mode, and so charmed the
>ER staff. And I blew up two latex gloves for her. So what we have
>learned from the experience is not to drink "baton water", and "glove
>balloons" are funny.

I'm glad and relieved it's worked out reasonably well.

--
http://nebusresearch.wordpress.com/ Joseph Nebus
Current Entry: Reading the Comics, July 28, 2012 http://wp.me/p1RYhY-hO
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Paul Madarasz]

On 31 Jul 2012 17:21:01 -0500, M C Hamster
<davo...@nospam-speakeasy.net> wrote, perhaps among other things:

>I hope that parents are not checking out the poop of their
>four-year-olds these days. I mean, enough is enough.

Unless they're German, of course.

>
>You didn't get it from Dairy Queen, I assume.
>http://www.cpsc.gov/cpscpub/prerel/prhtml97/97054.html
>No reports of poisoned liquid, but some of choking hazards.
--

Won't you share a common disaster?
Share with me a common disaster?

[Boron Elgar]

On Tue, 31 Jul 2012 14:03:45 -0700 (PDT), "Richard R. Hershberger"
<rrh...@acme.com> wrote:

You have earned your parental stripes. Congratulations.

Boron

[Xho Jingleheimerschmidt]

On 07/31/2012 02:03 PM, Richard R. Hershberger wrote:
> So what we have
> learned from the experience is not to drink "baton water", and "glove
> balloons" are funny.

Two lessons that exactly cancel.

Xho

[Richard R. Hershberger]

Nah, that happened before she was even two, when she came down with a
rotavirus at about 2:00 on a Sunday morning. That also rated a trip
to the ER, but it went much less well. I didn't realize it at the
time, but the ER wasn't actually staffed. The nurse decided this
didn't rate rousting a doctor out of bed, but didn't actually tell us
that. Instead we got a song and dance about all the available
treatment rooms being occupied. This was a transparent lie, as the
place was practically empty. So there we sat in the waiting room as
the kid twice vomited on the floor. And no, the staff didn't see fit
to clean it up. We went to the restroom for paper towels. She was
finally seen when the morning shift came on. They finally called for
her as I was literally walking out the door to take her to an urgent
care center. In retrospect I should have done that hours earlier, or
even driven her to the next county over, which has a much better
hospital. Then the idiot ER doctor ordered abdominal x-rays to check
for a blockage, which it was pretty obvious wasn't the problem, seeing
as how the kid was shooting from both ends.

This trip was to the same hospital. I considered the question, and
decided that timeliness was paramount, and this hospital is just up
the road from my house. Also, they have upgraded since the previous
visit, and this wasn't early on a Sunday morning.

I have no complaints about speed this time. We were in a treatment
room in an appropriately timely manner. Our family doctor the next
day was unimpressed with the minimal testing performed. This might be
snobbishness: she is affiliated with that better hospital the next
county over. But then again we chose to have both our kids at that
better hospital, which has an excellent birthing center. So my
assessment is that you only go to the local place when you are in a
hurry. If you have time for a forty-five minute drive, do it.

Richard R. Hershberger

[Richard R. Hershberger]

On Jul 31, 6:21 pm, M C Hamster <davol...@nospam-speakeasy.net> wrote:
> On Tue, 31 Jul 2012 16:19:15 -0500, Tim Wright <tlwrigh...@gmail.com>

I am happy to report that I rarely examine my four-year old's poop. I
sometimes get the pleasure with my two-year old, but we are working on
that. Then again, the older kid wasn't fully potty trained until she
was four. I am mean four exactly: it was clearly a conscious
decision that she was now a big girl, with the rights and
responsibilities thereof.
>
> You didn't get it from Dairy Queen, I assume.http://www.cpsc.gov/cpscpub/prerel/prhtml97/97054.html

> No reports of poisoned liquid, but some of choking hazards.

I don't know where we got it from, but it looks store-bought, not a
free giveaway, and we don't have a Diary Queen nearby.

Richard R. Hershberger

[Lesmond]

Glove balloons were the only thing that would keep my child calm at the
doctor when he was little. He's 12 now and still likes them. But the
doctors kinda frown upon wasting them on the older kids. So we usually just
pocket a couple and play with them at home.

--
If there's a nuclear winter, at least it'll snow.

[M C Hamster]

On Wed, 1 Aug 2012 09:17:00 -0700 (PDT), "Richard R. Hershberger"
<rrh...@acme.com> wrote:

>On Jul 31, 6:21�ｿｽpm, M C Hamster <davol...@nospam-speakeasy.net> wrote:
>> On Tue, 31 Jul 2012 16:19:15 -0500, Tim Wright <tlwrigh...@gmail.com>
>> wrote:
>>
>>
>>
>> >On 7/31/2012 4:03 PM, Richard R. Hershberger wrote:
>> >> So, last night the four-year old manages to break her liquid-filled

>> >> toy baton and drink some of the contents. �ｿｽJust water, right? �ｿｽYou
>> >> would think so. �ｿｽBut it had a distinct hydrocarbon odor to it, and she
>> >> started having labored breathing. �ｿｽMy German Lutheran heritage teaches
>> >> me that I only go to the ER if I am actually in cardiac arrest. �ｿｽIf
>> >> the heart attack is passed, that's what aspirin is for. �ｿｽBut my German
>> >> Lutheran blood is thinned in my kids. �ｿｽThis is what comes from
>> >> marrying an Italian Catholic. �ｿｽSo off the kid and I go to the
>> >> hospital. �ｿｽCredit where credit is due: �ｿｽwords like "ingested unknown

>> >> liquid" and "respiratory distress" got us into a treatment room fast.
>> >> After mulling things over and calling a poison center, the conclusion
>> >> is that the liquid probably started out as just water, but the plastic

>> >> glitter leached out some volatile hydrocarbons. �ｿｽBy the time we saw an
>> >> actual doctor the kid was breathing normally. �ｿｽThey gave her a cup of
>> >> apple juice and a package of chocolate pudding. �ｿｽEverything stayed

>> >> where it was supposed to, so we went home with instructions to see our

>> >> family doctor. �ｿｽThe wife took the kid there today. �ｿｽOur doctor

>> >> harrumphed at the standard of care, but decided that if anything was

>> >> going to happen, it would have already. �ｿｽSo a good time was had by
>> >> all. �ｿｽAnd the kid got apple juice and pudding, for just the price of
>> >> the co-pay. �ｿｽShe also was in her "adorable" mode, and so charmed the
>> >> ER staff. �ｿｽAnd I blew up two latex gloves for her. �ｿｽSo what we have

>> >> learned from the experience is not to drink "baton water", and "glove
>> >> balloons" are funny.
>>
>> >Now it is just a matter of waiting for the glittery poop to show up.
>>
>> I hope that parents are not checking out the poop of their

>> four-year-olds these days. �ｿｽI mean, enough is enough.

>
>I am happy to report that I rarely examine my four-year old's poop. I
>sometimes get the pleasure with my two-year old, but we are working on
>that. Then again, the older kid wasn't fully potty trained until she
>was four. I am mean four exactly: it was clearly a conscious
>decision that she was now a big girl, with the rights and
>responsibilities thereof.

It was poop that made me realize just how dramatically our social life
changed the moment we had a kid.

Before that, we were typical urban Yuppies and all our social friends
were other Yuppies. When we had our first child, the conversation
turned from things like rock concerts we'd recent attended and places
we'd recently travelled to, to long, fascinating conversations about
the consistency of our son's poop, and not surprisingly our friends
quickly became others with young children who would want to share
similar details with us, which we found highly engrossing.

Our friends who were still single and childless, for reasons that
puzzled us, did not seem to share our fascination with poop, and we
found they no longer wanted to come to our social gatherings.

[Boron Elgar]

On Wed, 1 Aug 2012 09:12:59 -0700 (PDT), "Richard R. Hershberger"
<rrh...@acme.com> wrote:

>On Jul 31, 9:40�pm, Boron Elgar <boron_el...@hootmail.com> wrote:

>>
>> You have earned your parental stripes. Congratulations.
>>
>> Boron
>
>Nah, that happened before she was even two, when she came down with a

>rotavirus at about 2:00 on a Sunday morning. snip

I made a few trips with the kids around that age and there was no
predicting the speed or level of care.

>This trip was to the same hospital. I considered the question, and
>decided that timeliness was paramount, and this hospital is just up
>the road from my house. Also, they have upgraded since the previous
>visit, and this wasn't early on a Sunday morning.

I must say that the last time I think I had one in to an ER, they had
divvied up the place so there was a separate pediatric area. That was
smart. It was staffed properly, set up for quick kiddie response and
also able to ease and physically accommodate worried parents.

>
>I have no complaints about speed this time. We were in a treatment
>room in an appropriately timely manner. Our family doctor the next
>day was unimpressed with the minimal testing performed. This might be
>snobbishness: she is affiliated with that better hospital the next
>county over. But then again we chose to have both our kids at that
>better hospital, which has an excellent birthing center. So my
>assessment is that you only go to the local place when you are in a
>hurry. If you have time for a forty-five minute drive, do it.
>

I hope you never have to truly evaluate the differences in any
emergency.

Boron