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What the Hell Happened to Melanie Griffith?
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Jan 6, 2013, 2:22:58 AM1/6/13
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Posted by lebeau
Melanie Griffith is the daughter of Hollywood icon, Tippi Hedren, an
Academy Award nominee and Golden Globe winner. She rose to the A-list
in the 80s working with directors like Brian De Palma, Mike Nichols
and Jonathan Demme. But after a promising decade, she stumbled and
fell off the a-List in the 90s.
What the hell happened?
Griffith was born into show business. Her mother, Tippi Hedren, is
best known for the films she made with Alfred Hitchcock, The Birds and
Marnie. Hedren suffered numerous indignities at the hands of the
legendary director. Griffith was a child at the time and remembers a
strange gift from Hitchcock.
“It was, like, a coffin box… and I opened it up and in it was a doll
of my mother from The Birds… It was, like, made by the studio. Can
you imagine the psychological effect (of that)… He was a very weird
guy.”
That’s for sure. Later in her career, Griffith would go on to appear
in an episode of the TV show, Alfred Hitchcock Presents, in the 80s.
Griffith’s biological father was also in “the biz” as an actor and
producer. Her parents divorced when she was only four years old. Her
father re-married a model/actress and her mother re-married an agent/
producer. Given this upbringing, it is no surprise that Griffith
started doing commercials at age 12.
At age 14, Griffith began dating her mother’s 22-year-old Harrad
Experiment co-star, Don Johnson. Griffith had an uncredited cameo in
the film. Griffith and Johnson were married in 1976. The marriage
lasted only six moths.
In 1975, Griffith started getting her first credited film roles. She
appeared in three films that year. The Drowning, co-starred Paul
Newman. Smile starred Bruce Dern. Her most significant role was in
the neo-noir detective drama, Night Moves which starred Gene Hackman.
Night Moves was not a success when it was released, but it has gained
critical support over time. Many now consider it the last great film
by director Arthur Penn. Night Moves is perhaps best known for
Griffiths many nude scenes. She was reportedly only 17 when she
filmed them.
At the time, Griffith was living the show biz lifestyle. Actress
Tatum O’Neal has claimed that, she and Griffith had a sexual encounter
in a Paris hotel room while high on opium and hashish. O’Neal was
only 12 and Griffith was 18.
Throughout the late 70′s, Griffith worked on TV movies, mini-series
and small roles in film. She appeared in the movie Roar with her
mother in 1978.
In 1982, she married her second husband, actor Steven Bauer (best
known as Manny Ribera in the Brian De Palma’s Scarface.) The couple
had a son together in 1985 and divorced in 1987.
Griffith’s big break came in Brian De Palma’s 1984 thriller, Body
Double.
De Palma was a “student of Hitchcock” which is sort of a polite way of
saying that he ripped off the master of suspense shamelessly. Body
Double borrows liberally from Hitchcock classics, Vertigo and Rear
Window.
Griffith played a porn star who, you know what, I’m not going to
explain the plot. It’s silly and anything I can tell you about it
would constitute a spoiler. She played a porn star, okay?
Originally, De Palma intended to cast an actual porn star in the
role. But you have to imagine the idea of casting Tippi Hedren’s
daughter was too much for the Hitchcock-obsessed director to resist.
Body Double was mostly panned by critics. And understandably so.
It’s hard not to laugh at the film’s excesses. It’s hard to tell
whether or not De Palma intends this as a Hitchcock satire or an
homage. While most critics dismissed the film, many singled out
Griffith for praise.
The movie flopped at the box office. But it developed a cult
following on video.
It is seriously ridiculous. Just watch Vertigo instead.
In 1984, Griffith starred opposite Lando Calrissian (Billy Dee
Williams for the geek-impaired) and Tom Berenger in the sexy thriller,
Fear City.
Griffith played a stripper. Are we sensing a trend here?
In 1985, Griffith starred opposite Jeff Daniels in Jonathan Demme’s
quirky comedy, Something Wild.
Griffith plays a variation on the manic pixie dream girl who turns
Daniels’ life upside down. Daniels plays an uptight banker who
Griffith catches in the midst of a dine-and-dash. Griffith’s Lulu is
intrigued by this relatively mild rebellion and takes Daniels’ Charlie
on a series of adventures.
The great thing about Something Wild is that it takes an unexpected
dark turn in the film’s final act. Usually in these movies, the hero
learns to loosen up through the irresponsible and self-destructive
behavior of a beautiful stranger.
That’s true here too, but the couple’s actions have real life
repercussions when Lulu’s violent ex boy friend Ray, played by a never-
scarier Ray Liotta, arrives on the scene.
Something Wild is sexy, scary, romantic, dark, funny and appropriately
enough wild. Critics responded to its quirky charms even if
mainstream audiences didn’t know what to make of it.
Griffith, Daniels and Liotta were all nominated for Golden Globes for
their performances. And Something Wild has developed a cult
following.
In 1987, Griffith divorced for the second time. She later admitted
that this caused her to abuse liquor and cocaine. ”What I did was
drink myself to sleep at night. If I wasn’t with someone, I was an
unhappy girl.”
Every “What the Hell Happened” article includes at least one “big
year”. In Griffith’s case, that year was 1988 which included the
direct-to-video release of the sci-fi flick Cherry 2000 in which
Griffith had really, really red hair.
Cherry 2000 is about a future in which there are sex robots.
Amazingly, Griffith does not play one. The movie was filmed in 1986
and released to video after Griffith became a star.
Seriously, how was she not a sex robot in this thing?
Later that year, Griffith appeared in a small role as a trophy wife in
Robert Redford’s The Milagro Beanfield War.
Later that year, she appeared in Mike Figgis’ directorial debut,
Stormy Monday opposite Sean Bean, Tommy Lee Jones and Sting.
Stormy Monday was yet another sexy neo noir thriller. This time,
Griffith played a waitress which I suppose is a step up from the
strippers and prostitutes she had been playing up to this point in her
career.
Griffith’s career changed completely when she starred opposite
Harrison Ford and Sigourney Weaver in Mike Nichols’ comedy, Working
Girl.
Griffith, of course, plays a prostitute. I mean, the movie is called
Working Girl and it stars an actress who has specialized in strippers
and prostitutes up to this point. Wait! She isn’t a prostitute?
Well, she sort of is, but not literally.
First Griffith doesn’t play a sex robot in Cherry 2000 and now she’s
not a prostitute in Working Girl. My world makes no sense any more.
Griffith played Tess McGill, a Staten Island secretary who rises
through the ranks of the business world by posing as her boss when she
is laid up after a skiing accident. Soon, she has entered into both a
business and romantic relationship with Ford’s character.
In the film’s most famous line, Griffith says, “I have a head for
business and a bod for sin.” I was shocked by how often this quote
was mangled on the internet. It’s “bod” people. Not “body”. What
the hell!
Working Girl featured a number of actors who would go on to great
success in their careers including Oliver Platt, Kevin Spacey, and
Alec Baldwin. It also co-starred Joan Cusack who would score an
Academy Award nomination for the film.
Reviews were mostly positive and Griffith was once again singled out
for praise. She was nominated for an Oscar and won a Golden Globe.
The movie was a huge hit at the box office.
This was the high point. It’s all downhill from here.
During her big year, Griffith checked herself into rehab and sobered
up. In 1989, she reunited with her ex-husband, Don Johnson. Which is
a really bad call after sobering up. The remarried when Griffith was
5 months pregnant with their daughter, Dakota. The on-again/off-again
couple separated for good in 1995.
Until we reach that point, just assume they are making up and breaking
up over and over again. I’m not going to try to keep track of these
two.
In 1990, Griffith starred in a not-so-sexy thriller, Pacific Heights.
Griffith co-starred with Matthew Modine as a couple that gets taken in
by a psychotic tenant played by Batman (the Michael Keaton version).
Griffith’s mom also has a cameo role as a wealthy woman taken in by
Keaton’s con man.
Pacific Heights got mixed to negative reviews, but managed to be a
modest success at the box office.
Later that year, Griffith co-starred with Tom Hanks and Bruce Willis
in Brian De Palma’s comedy, Bonfire of the Vanities.
Where to start with the appropriately titled Bonfire of the Vanities?
Books have literally been written about what went wrong making this
movie. Most famously, Julie Salamon’s The Devils’s Candy chronicles
the making of this notorious flop.
The movie was based on Tom Wolfe’s cynical satire of the same name.
In the book, Sherman McCoy is a Wall Street investor who refers to
himself as a “Master of the Universe. He’s built more like Arnold
Schwarzenegger than Tom Hanks. He was not a sympathetic guy as is
evidenced by the plot which centers around a racially charged trial
over a hit-and-run in which Sherman is complicit.
It’s tricky material to adapt into a big budget Hollywood movie with a
Christmas release. And yet, that is what Warner Bros decided to do.
De Palma himself would later summarize what went wrong with Bonfire:
“The initial concept of it was incorrect. If you’re going to do The
Bonfire of the Vanities, you would have to make it a lot darker and
more cynical, but because it was such an expensive movie we tried to
humanize the Sherman McCoy character – a very unlikeable character,
much like the character in The Magnificent Ambersons. We could have
done that if we’d been making a low-budget movie, but this was a
studio movie with Tom Hanks in it. We made a couple of choices that in
retrospect were wrong.”
How screwed up were the filmmaker’s priorities? They spent $80,000
for a 10 second shot in which the setting sun lined up with the a
runway at JFK air port. That’s an expensive back drop!
According to Salamon, Tom Hanks dismissed Uma Thurman’s audition for
the part eventually played by Griffith as “high school”. (Maybe he’s
not such a nice guy after all.) Lena Olin also auditioned for the
role and told the crew she had never heard of Hanks (this was before
he was a beloved Hollywood icon). And the crew bitched about how hard
it was to make Griffith look attractive on film.
Perhaps as a result of comments from the crew, Griffith made a rash
decision during the film’s Christmas break. Without telling anyone
associated with the film, she went out and got a boob job. When she
returned to continue shooting, she grabbed De Palma by the head and
shoved his face in her new boobs.
Oh, also Bruce Willis is an asshole no one got along with. But I
think we already knew that.
I could go on all day about Bonfire of the Vanities. But since the
entire disaster has already been well-documented, I will just say that
the reviews were terrible and the movie flopped in spite of Griffith’s
newly enhanced rack.
Griffith was also nominated for a Golden Raspberry.
In 1991, Griffith starred opposite her first and third husbands (both
of whom were Don Johnson) in the little seen country drama, Paradise.
The film also features future hobbit, Elijah Wood and future What the
Hell Happened subject, Thora Birch.
In 1992, Griffith returned to mainstream movies opposite Michael
Douglas in the World War II drama, Shining Through.
I don’t know what they are watching in that picture, but the theater
is empty and they don’t seem to be enjoying themselves. Hey! Maybe
they are watching Shining Through!
Roger Ebert summarized critical reaction with this quote:
“I know it’s only a movie, and so perhaps I should be willing to
suspend my disbelief, but Shining Through is such an insult to the
intelligence that I wasn’t able to do that. Here is a film in which
scene after scene is so implausible that the movie kept pushing me
outside and making me ask how the key scenes could possibly be taken
seriously.”
Reportedly, Griffith learned a little history while making Shining
Through. Apparently, up until this point, Griffith had been unaware
that the Nazis “did bad things” to the Jews during World War II.
Griffith was outraged by this news and spoke out on it decades after
the fact. This earned her the nickname “Brainiac” in Toronto-area
press for years to come.
Shining Through won Worst Picture and Griffith won Worst Actress at
the 1992 Razzie Awards.
Later that year, Griffith starred in A Stranger Among Us.
Griffith played an undercover cop in what I can only assume was meant
to be Witness with Hasidic Jews instead of the Amish and Tess McGill
instead of Harrison Ford.
A Stranger Among Us was directed by Sidney Lumet and was entered in
the Cannes Film Festival. But it got terrible reviews and bombed at
the box office.
Proving that Griffith did not learn from past mistakes, she made
another movie with hubby, Don Johnson in 1993.
This one was Born Yesterday which co-starred John Goodman. The
business comedy failed to repeat the success of Working Girl and
earned Griffith another Golden Raspberry award.
In 1994, Griffith returned to prostitution (or playing prostitutes in
movies anyway) for the supposed comedy, Milk Money.
Griffith plays a hooker named V who flashes a kid for money. The kid
then invites V to live in his tree house and hooks her up with his dad
(played by Ed Harris who should know better).
Milk Money was nominated for a Golden Raspberry for Worst Screenplay.
But Griffith was passed over.
Later that year, Griffith had a small role in the comedy-drama,
Nobody’s Fool which starred Paul Newman and the asshole from Bonfire
of the Vanities, Bruce Willis.
Although her role was small, Griffith still found time to flash her
boobs.
Nobody’s Fool was actually a good movie. Newman was nominated for an
Oscar. Reviews were good and the movie was a modest hit.
In 1995, Griffith starred opposite Angelica Huston in the TV mini-
series, Buffalo Girls. I mention it merely so I can offset some of
those Golden Raspberries with the Golden Globe nomination Griffith
received.
Later that year, Griffith appeared as part of the ensemble cast of Now
and Then.
Now and Then told the story of four friends in childhood and played by
different actresses in adulthood. Griffith co-starred with Demi Moore
and Rosie O’Donnell as the grown-up friends. Her younger self was
played by her Paradise co-star, Thora Birch.
Despite bad reviews, Now and Then was a modest hit.
Griffith capped off the year by starring in the screwball comedy, Two
Much, opposite Antonio (“Too Sexy”) Banderas and Daryl Hannah.
On the subject of Two Much in What the Hell Happened to Daryl Hannah,
I wrote: “I can’t possibly be expected to read the synopsis of this
thing. Did it involve twins? Let’s just assume Banderas played
twins, shall we?”
Friend of the Blog, Paul (of the wonderful Pfeiffer Pfilms and Meg
Movies) saved me the trouble of watching Two Much by confirming my
suspicion that Banderas did in fact play twins. Twins by the names of
Art and Bart no less! Apparently Banderas distinguished between the
characters by wearing glasses.
Thanks again, Paul!
The movie was panned by critics and bombed at the box office. Pretty
much everyone involved was nominated for a Golden Raspberry. Both
Griffith and Hannah won. Apparently the glasses saved Banderas.
On the upside, Griffith and Banderas started a romantic relationship.
Griffith dumped long-time husband and drug addict, Don Johnson for the
latin hunk. The couple was married the next year after their
respective divorces were finalized. They had a daughter together and
in 2002 received the Stella Adler Angel Award for their charity work.
So, at least something good came out of Two Much. Poor Daryl Hannah
came away empty-handed.
In 1996, Griffith co-starred opposite Nick Nolte and Jennifer Connelly
in the neo noir crime thriller, Mulholland Falls in which no one
played a pair of twins. Which is a shame because Nolte would have
rocked the glasses.
All kidding aside, Mulholland Falls (which was not directed by David
Lynch) got mixed to negative reviews and bombed at the box office).
In 1997, Griffith starred opposite Jeremy Irons in Adrian Lyons’ ill-
advised remake of Stanley Kubrick’s classic, Lolita.
The remake was controversial in the US. Not because the director of
Flashdance and 9 1/2 Weeks has no business remaking Kubrick. But
because Americans are a puritanical bunch who get their panties in a
twist over sex in movies.
Reviews were mixed, but the movie bombed so badly that Griffith is
pictured doing a face palm.
In 1998, Griffith appeared in a Woody Allen movie as every actress
must. In this case, it was Allen’s dud , Celebrity which co-starred
everyone in Hollywood including Winona Ryder.
She also starred opposite James Woods in Another Day in Paradise which
co-starred Vincent Kartheiser who would go on to success in TV on
Angel and Mad Men. Apparently, Another Day in Paradise is NOT a
sequel to the farm drama Griffith made with ex-hubby Don Johnson.
In 1999, Griffith appeared in two films. The first was Crazy in
Alabama which was directed by her husband, Antinio Banderas. The
second was RKO 281 about the making of Citizen Kane.
Alabama got bad reviews. RKO 281 got good reviews. Neither movie was
a hit. Griffith earned another Golden Raspberry nomination for
Alabama.
In 2000, Griffith starred in the John Waters-directed black comedy,
Cecil B. Demented.
Like Kathleen Turner in Serial Mom, starring in a campy Waters comedy
is a pretty sure sign that an actress’ sex symbol days are behind
her. Reviews were mixed. The movie did about what you would expect
from John Waters. And Griffith got another Golden Raspberry
nomination.
She also starred in Forever Lulu which costarred Patrick Swayze and
Penelope Ann Miller.
Gentle readers, I tried to sit through this movie for this article.
But I could not make it. What I got from it was that it was a
melodrama in which Griffith plays another crazy lady and for reasons I
don’t remember Swayze takes her on a road trip. I also remember the
acting was horrible.
From there, Griffith more or less disappeared from the big screen.
She did a voice in Stuart Little 2 in 2002. She has done some TV work
including a sit-com called Twins which ran from 2005-06. Her show,
Viva Laughlin was cancelled after only two episodes aired in 2007.
And she has done guest spots on Nip/Tuck and Hot in Cleveland.
She checked herself into rehab in 2000 and again in 2009. She has
also been treated for skin cancer.
So, what the hell happened?
Griffith’s early career was fueled by her sexuality. She made the
jump to respectability with Working Girl, but failed to capitalize on
it. Bonfire of the Vanities stopped her career momentum dead. And
most everything she has done since has been embarrassing. When her
looks faded due to drug and alcohol abuse, the roles dried up.
But, she did manage to land one of the most sought-after hunks of the
90s as her fourth husband (counting Johnson twice, third if you only
count him once).
Posted by lebeau
Melanie Griffith is the daughter of Hollywood icon, Tippi Hedren, an
Academy Award nominee and Golden Globe winner. She rose to the A-list
in the 80s working with directors like Brian De Palma, Mike Nichols
and Jonathan Demme. But after a promising decade, she stumbled and
fell off the a-List in the 90s.
What the hell happened?
Griffith was born into show business. Her mother, Tippi Hedren, is
best known for the films she made with Alfred Hitchcock, The Birds and
Marnie. Hedren suffered numerous indignities at the hands of the
legendary director. Griffith was a child at the time and remembers a
strange gift from Hitchcock.
“It was, like, a coffin box… and I opened it up and in it was a doll
of my mother from The Birds… It was, like, made by the studio. Can
you imagine the psychological effect (of that)… He was a very weird
guy.”
That’s for sure. Later in her career, Griffith would go on to appear
in an episode of the TV show, Alfred Hitchcock Presents, in the 80s.
Griffith’s biological father was also in “the biz” as an actor and
producer. Her parents divorced when she was only four years old. Her
father re-married a model/actress and her mother re-married an agent/
producer. Given this upbringing, it is no surprise that Griffith
started doing commercials at age 12.
At age 14, Griffith began dating her mother’s 22-year-old Harrad
Experiment co-star, Don Johnson. Griffith had an uncredited cameo in
the film. Griffith and Johnson were married in 1976. The marriage
lasted only six moths.
In 1975, Griffith started getting her first credited film roles. She
appeared in three films that year. The Drowning, co-starred Paul
Newman. Smile starred Bruce Dern. Her most significant role was in
the neo-noir detective drama, Night Moves which starred Gene Hackman.
Night Moves was not a success when it was released, but it has gained
critical support over time. Many now consider it the last great film
by director Arthur Penn. Night Moves is perhaps best known for
Griffiths many nude scenes. She was reportedly only 17 when she
filmed them.
At the time, Griffith was living the show biz lifestyle. Actress
Tatum O’Neal has claimed that, she and Griffith had a sexual encounter
in a Paris hotel room while high on opium and hashish. O’Neal was
only 12 and Griffith was 18.
Throughout the late 70′s, Griffith worked on TV movies, mini-series
and small roles in film. She appeared in the movie Roar with her
mother in 1978.
In 1982, she married her second husband, actor Steven Bauer (best
known as Manny Ribera in the Brian De Palma’s Scarface.) The couple
had a son together in 1985 and divorced in 1987.
Griffith’s big break came in Brian De Palma’s 1984 thriller, Body
Double.
De Palma was a “student of Hitchcock” which is sort of a polite way of
saying that he ripped off the master of suspense shamelessly. Body
Double borrows liberally from Hitchcock classics, Vertigo and Rear
Window.
Griffith played a porn star who, you know what, I’m not going to
explain the plot. It’s silly and anything I can tell you about it
would constitute a spoiler. She played a porn star, okay?
Originally, De Palma intended to cast an actual porn star in the
role. But you have to imagine the idea of casting Tippi Hedren’s
daughter was too much for the Hitchcock-obsessed director to resist.
Body Double was mostly panned by critics. And understandably so.
It’s hard not to laugh at the film’s excesses. It’s hard to tell
whether or not De Palma intends this as a Hitchcock satire or an
homage. While most critics dismissed the film, many singled out
Griffith for praise.
The movie flopped at the box office. But it developed a cult
following on video.
It is seriously ridiculous. Just watch Vertigo instead.
In 1984, Griffith starred opposite Lando Calrissian (Billy Dee
Williams for the geek-impaired) and Tom Berenger in the sexy thriller,
Fear City.
Griffith played a stripper. Are we sensing a trend here?
In 1985, Griffith starred opposite Jeff Daniels in Jonathan Demme’s
quirky comedy, Something Wild.
Griffith plays a variation on the manic pixie dream girl who turns
Daniels’ life upside down. Daniels plays an uptight banker who
Griffith catches in the midst of a dine-and-dash. Griffith’s Lulu is
intrigued by this relatively mild rebellion and takes Daniels’ Charlie
on a series of adventures.
The great thing about Something Wild is that it takes an unexpected
dark turn in the film’s final act. Usually in these movies, the hero
learns to loosen up through the irresponsible and self-destructive
behavior of a beautiful stranger.
That’s true here too, but the couple’s actions have real life
repercussions when Lulu’s violent ex boy friend Ray, played by a never-
scarier Ray Liotta, arrives on the scene.
Something Wild is sexy, scary, romantic, dark, funny and appropriately
enough wild. Critics responded to its quirky charms even if
mainstream audiences didn’t know what to make of it.
Griffith, Daniels and Liotta were all nominated for Golden Globes for
their performances. And Something Wild has developed a cult
following.
In 1987, Griffith divorced for the second time. She later admitted
that this caused her to abuse liquor and cocaine. ”What I did was
drink myself to sleep at night. If I wasn’t with someone, I was an
unhappy girl.”
Every “What the Hell Happened” article includes at least one “big
year”. In Griffith’s case, that year was 1988 which included the
direct-to-video release of the sci-fi flick Cherry 2000 in which
Griffith had really, really red hair.
Cherry 2000 is about a future in which there are sex robots.
Amazingly, Griffith does not play one. The movie was filmed in 1986
and released to video after Griffith became a star.
Seriously, how was she not a sex robot in this thing?
Later that year, Griffith appeared in a small role as a trophy wife in
Robert Redford’s The Milagro Beanfield War.
Later that year, she appeared in Mike Figgis’ directorial debut,
Stormy Monday opposite Sean Bean, Tommy Lee Jones and Sting.
Stormy Monday was yet another sexy neo noir thriller. This time,
Griffith played a waitress which I suppose is a step up from the
strippers and prostitutes she had been playing up to this point in her
career.
Griffith’s career changed completely when she starred opposite
Harrison Ford and Sigourney Weaver in Mike Nichols’ comedy, Working
Girl.
Griffith, of course, plays a prostitute. I mean, the movie is called
Working Girl and it stars an actress who has specialized in strippers
and prostitutes up to this point. Wait! She isn’t a prostitute?
Well, she sort of is, but not literally.
First Griffith doesn’t play a sex robot in Cherry 2000 and now she’s
not a prostitute in Working Girl. My world makes no sense any more.
Griffith played Tess McGill, a Staten Island secretary who rises
through the ranks of the business world by posing as her boss when she
is laid up after a skiing accident. Soon, she has entered into both a
business and romantic relationship with Ford’s character.
In the film’s most famous line, Griffith says, “I have a head for
business and a bod for sin.” I was shocked by how often this quote
was mangled on the internet. It’s “bod” people. Not “body”. What
the hell!
Working Girl featured a number of actors who would go on to great
success in their careers including Oliver Platt, Kevin Spacey, and
Alec Baldwin. It also co-starred Joan Cusack who would score an
Academy Award nomination for the film.
Reviews were mostly positive and Griffith was once again singled out
for praise. She was nominated for an Oscar and won a Golden Globe.
The movie was a huge hit at the box office.
This was the high point. It’s all downhill from here.
During her big year, Griffith checked herself into rehab and sobered
up. In 1989, she reunited with her ex-husband, Don Johnson. Which is
a really bad call after sobering up. The remarried when Griffith was
5 months pregnant with their daughter, Dakota. The on-again/off-again
couple separated for good in 1995.
Until we reach that point, just assume they are making up and breaking
up over and over again. I’m not going to try to keep track of these
two.
In 1990, Griffith starred in a not-so-sexy thriller, Pacific Heights.
Griffith co-starred with Matthew Modine as a couple that gets taken in
by a psychotic tenant played by Batman (the Michael Keaton version).
Griffith’s mom also has a cameo role as a wealthy woman taken in by
Keaton’s con man.
Pacific Heights got mixed to negative reviews, but managed to be a
modest success at the box office.
Later that year, Griffith co-starred with Tom Hanks and Bruce Willis
in Brian De Palma’s comedy, Bonfire of the Vanities.
Where to start with the appropriately titled Bonfire of the Vanities?
Books have literally been written about what went wrong making this
movie. Most famously, Julie Salamon’s The Devils’s Candy chronicles
the making of this notorious flop.
The movie was based on Tom Wolfe’s cynical satire of the same name.
In the book, Sherman McCoy is a Wall Street investor who refers to
himself as a “Master of the Universe. He’s built more like Arnold
Schwarzenegger than Tom Hanks. He was not a sympathetic guy as is
evidenced by the plot which centers around a racially charged trial
over a hit-and-run in which Sherman is complicit.
It’s tricky material to adapt into a big budget Hollywood movie with a
Christmas release. And yet, that is what Warner Bros decided to do.
De Palma himself would later summarize what went wrong with Bonfire:
“The initial concept of it was incorrect. If you’re going to do The
Bonfire of the Vanities, you would have to make it a lot darker and
more cynical, but because it was such an expensive movie we tried to
humanize the Sherman McCoy character – a very unlikeable character,
much like the character in The Magnificent Ambersons. We could have
done that if we’d been making a low-budget movie, but this was a
studio movie with Tom Hanks in it. We made a couple of choices that in
retrospect were wrong.”
How screwed up were the filmmaker’s priorities? They spent $80,000
for a 10 second shot in which the setting sun lined up with the a
runway at JFK air port. That’s an expensive back drop!
According to Salamon, Tom Hanks dismissed Uma Thurman’s audition for
the part eventually played by Griffith as “high school”. (Maybe he’s
not such a nice guy after all.) Lena Olin also auditioned for the
role and told the crew she had never heard of Hanks (this was before
he was a beloved Hollywood icon). And the crew bitched about how hard
it was to make Griffith look attractive on film.
Perhaps as a result of comments from the crew, Griffith made a rash
decision during the film’s Christmas break. Without telling anyone
associated with the film, she went out and got a boob job. When she
returned to continue shooting, she grabbed De Palma by the head and
shoved his face in her new boobs.
Oh, also Bruce Willis is an asshole no one got along with. But I
think we already knew that.
I could go on all day about Bonfire of the Vanities. But since the
entire disaster has already been well-documented, I will just say that
the reviews were terrible and the movie flopped in spite of Griffith’s
newly enhanced rack.
Griffith was also nominated for a Golden Raspberry.
In 1991, Griffith starred opposite her first and third husbands (both
of whom were Don Johnson) in the little seen country drama, Paradise.
The film also features future hobbit, Elijah Wood and future What the
Hell Happened subject, Thora Birch.
In 1992, Griffith returned to mainstream movies opposite Michael
Douglas in the World War II drama, Shining Through.
I don’t know what they are watching in that picture, but the theater
is empty and they don’t seem to be enjoying themselves. Hey! Maybe
they are watching Shining Through!
Roger Ebert summarized critical reaction with this quote:
“I know it’s only a movie, and so perhaps I should be willing to
suspend my disbelief, but Shining Through is such an insult to the
intelligence that I wasn’t able to do that. Here is a film in which
scene after scene is so implausible that the movie kept pushing me
outside and making me ask how the key scenes could possibly be taken
seriously.”
Reportedly, Griffith learned a little history while making Shining
Through. Apparently, up until this point, Griffith had been unaware
that the Nazis “did bad things” to the Jews during World War II.
Griffith was outraged by this news and spoke out on it decades after
the fact. This earned her the nickname “Brainiac” in Toronto-area
press for years to come.
Shining Through won Worst Picture and Griffith won Worst Actress at
the 1992 Razzie Awards.
Later that year, Griffith starred in A Stranger Among Us.
Griffith played an undercover cop in what I can only assume was meant
to be Witness with Hasidic Jews instead of the Amish and Tess McGill
instead of Harrison Ford.
A Stranger Among Us was directed by Sidney Lumet and was entered in
the Cannes Film Festival. But it got terrible reviews and bombed at
the box office.
Proving that Griffith did not learn from past mistakes, she made
another movie with hubby, Don Johnson in 1993.
This one was Born Yesterday which co-starred John Goodman. The
business comedy failed to repeat the success of Working Girl and
earned Griffith another Golden Raspberry award.
In 1994, Griffith returned to prostitution (or playing prostitutes in
movies anyway) for the supposed comedy, Milk Money.
Griffith plays a hooker named V who flashes a kid for money. The kid
then invites V to live in his tree house and hooks her up with his dad
(played by Ed Harris who should know better).
Milk Money was nominated for a Golden Raspberry for Worst Screenplay.
But Griffith was passed over.
Later that year, Griffith had a small role in the comedy-drama,
Nobody’s Fool which starred Paul Newman and the asshole from Bonfire
of the Vanities, Bruce Willis.
Although her role was small, Griffith still found time to flash her
boobs.
Nobody’s Fool was actually a good movie. Newman was nominated for an
Oscar. Reviews were good and the movie was a modest hit.
In 1995, Griffith starred opposite Angelica Huston in the TV mini-
series, Buffalo Girls. I mention it merely so I can offset some of
those Golden Raspberries with the Golden Globe nomination Griffith
received.
Later that year, Griffith appeared as part of the ensemble cast of Now
and Then.
Now and Then told the story of four friends in childhood and played by
different actresses in adulthood. Griffith co-starred with Demi Moore
and Rosie O’Donnell as the grown-up friends. Her younger self was
played by her Paradise co-star, Thora Birch.
Despite bad reviews, Now and Then was a modest hit.
Griffith capped off the year by starring in the screwball comedy, Two
Much, opposite Antonio (“Too Sexy”) Banderas and Daryl Hannah.
On the subject of Two Much in What the Hell Happened to Daryl Hannah,
I wrote: “I can’t possibly be expected to read the synopsis of this
thing. Did it involve twins? Let’s just assume Banderas played
twins, shall we?”
Friend of the Blog, Paul (of the wonderful Pfeiffer Pfilms and Meg
Movies) saved me the trouble of watching Two Much by confirming my
suspicion that Banderas did in fact play twins. Twins by the names of
Art and Bart no less! Apparently Banderas distinguished between the
characters by wearing glasses.
Thanks again, Paul!
The movie was panned by critics and bombed at the box office. Pretty
much everyone involved was nominated for a Golden Raspberry. Both
Griffith and Hannah won. Apparently the glasses saved Banderas.
On the upside, Griffith and Banderas started a romantic relationship.
Griffith dumped long-time husband and drug addict, Don Johnson for the
latin hunk. The couple was married the next year after their
respective divorces were finalized. They had a daughter together and
in 2002 received the Stella Adler Angel Award for their charity work.
So, at least something good came out of Two Much. Poor Daryl Hannah
came away empty-handed.
In 1996, Griffith co-starred opposite Nick Nolte and Jennifer Connelly
in the neo noir crime thriller, Mulholland Falls in which no one
played a pair of twins. Which is a shame because Nolte would have
rocked the glasses.
All kidding aside, Mulholland Falls (which was not directed by David
Lynch) got mixed to negative reviews and bombed at the box office).
In 1997, Griffith starred opposite Jeremy Irons in Adrian Lyons’ ill-
advised remake of Stanley Kubrick’s classic, Lolita.
The remake was controversial in the US. Not because the director of
Flashdance and 9 1/2 Weeks has no business remaking Kubrick. But
because Americans are a puritanical bunch who get their panties in a
twist over sex in movies.
Reviews were mixed, but the movie bombed so badly that Griffith is
pictured doing a face palm.
In 1998, Griffith appeared in a Woody Allen movie as every actress
must. In this case, it was Allen’s dud , Celebrity which co-starred
everyone in Hollywood including Winona Ryder.
She also starred opposite James Woods in Another Day in Paradise which
co-starred Vincent Kartheiser who would go on to success in TV on
Angel and Mad Men. Apparently, Another Day in Paradise is NOT a
sequel to the farm drama Griffith made with ex-hubby Don Johnson.
In 1999, Griffith appeared in two films. The first was Crazy in
Alabama which was directed by her husband, Antinio Banderas. The
second was RKO 281 about the making of Citizen Kane.
Alabama got bad reviews. RKO 281 got good reviews. Neither movie was
a hit. Griffith earned another Golden Raspberry nomination for
Alabama.
In 2000, Griffith starred in the John Waters-directed black comedy,
Cecil B. Demented.
Like Kathleen Turner in Serial Mom, starring in a campy Waters comedy
is a pretty sure sign that an actress’ sex symbol days are behind
her. Reviews were mixed. The movie did about what you would expect
from John Waters. And Griffith got another Golden Raspberry
nomination.
She also starred in Forever Lulu which costarred Patrick Swayze and
Penelope Ann Miller.
Gentle readers, I tried to sit through this movie for this article.
But I could not make it. What I got from it was that it was a
melodrama in which Griffith plays another crazy lady and for reasons I
don’t remember Swayze takes her on a road trip. I also remember the
acting was horrible.
From there, Griffith more or less disappeared from the big screen.
She did a voice in Stuart Little 2 in 2002. She has done some TV work
including a sit-com called Twins which ran from 2005-06. Her show,
Viva Laughlin was cancelled after only two episodes aired in 2007.
And she has done guest spots on Nip/Tuck and Hot in Cleveland.
She checked herself into rehab in 2000 and again in 2009. She has
also been treated for skin cancer.
So, what the hell happened?
Griffith’s early career was fueled by her sexuality. She made the
jump to respectability with Working Girl, but failed to capitalize on
it. Bonfire of the Vanities stopped her career momentum dead. And
most everything she has done since has been embarrassing. When her
looks faded due to drug and alcohol abuse, the roles dried up.
But, she did manage to land one of the most sought-after hunks of the
90s as her fourth husband (counting Johnson twice, third if you only
count him once).
Dano
Jan 6, 2013, 11:55:20 AM1/6/13
to
"TMC" wrote in message
news:6e5d32d0-57b6-4a4d...@z8g2000yqo.googlegroups.com...
Melanie Griffith...
<snip>
Who the fuck is "lebeau" and why should anyone give a rat's ass what she
thinks?
Safe to say Ms. Griffith's worst year was far greater in any impact or
income of this "lebeau" character.
Bruce Willis' as well.
What the hell happened to TMC? Oh wait...no one cares about that either.
news:6e5d32d0-57b6-4a4d...@z8g2000yqo.googlegroups.com...
Melanie Griffith...
<snip>
Who the fuck is "lebeau" and why should anyone give a rat's ass what she
thinks?
Safe to say Ms. Griffith's worst year was far greater in any impact or
income of this "lebeau" character.
Bruce Willis' as well.
What the hell happened to TMC? Oh wait...no one cares about that either.
Wiseguy
Jan 6, 2013, 3:54:33 PM1/6/13
to
TMC <tmc...@gmail.com> wrote in
news:6e5d32d0-57b6-4a4d...@z8g2000yqo.googlegroups.com:
> http://lebeauleblog.com/2013/01/05/what-the-hell-happened-to-melanie-gr
news:6e5d32d0-57b6-4a4d...@z8g2000yqo.googlegroups.com:
> http://lebeauleblog.com/2013/01/05/what-the-hell-happened-to-melanie-gr
> iffith/
>
> Posted by lebeau
>
> Melanie Griffith is the daughter of Hollywood icon, Tippi Hedren, an
> Academy Award nominee and Golden Globe winner. She rose to the A-list
> in the 80s working with directors like Brian De Palma, Mike Nichols
> and Jonathan Demme. But after a promising decade, she stumbled and
> fell off the a-List in the 90s.
>
> What the hell happened?
>
>
>
> Posted by lebeau
>
> Melanie Griffith is the daughter of Hollywood icon, Tippi Hedren, an
> Academy Award nominee and Golden Globe winner. She rose to the A-list
> in the 80s working with directors like Brian De Palma, Mike Nichols
> and Jonathan Demme. But after a promising decade, she stumbled and
> fell off the a-List in the 90s.
>
> What the hell happened?
>
>
> At age 14, Griffith began dating her mother’s 22-year-old Harrad
> Experiment co-star, Don Johnson. Griffith had an uncredited cameo in
> the film. Griffith and Johnson were married in 1976. The marriage
> lasted only six moths.
>
>
Those marriages that only last six moths prove that time flies.
> Experiment co-star, Don Johnson. Griffith had an uncredited cameo in
> the film. Griffith and Johnson were married in 1976. The marriage
> lasted only six moths.
>
>
David Barnett
Jan 7, 2013, 1:37:01 PM1/7/13
to
In article <6e5d32d0-57b6-4a4d-8203-29dc88bb8603
@z8g2000yqo.googlegroups.com>, tmc...@gmail.com says...
> of my mother from The Birds? It was, like, made by the studio. Can
> you imagine the psychological effect (of that)? He was a very weird
> guy.?
>
> That?s for sure. Later in her career, Griffith would go on to appear
> in a Paris hotel room while high on opium and hashish. O?Neal was
> Double.
>
> De Palma was a ?student of Hitchcock? which is sort of a polite way of
> explain the plot. It?s silly and anything I can tell you about it
> Griffith catches in the midst of a dine-and-dash. Griffith?s Lulu is
> intrigued by this relatively mild rebellion and takes Daniels? Charlie
> repercussions when Lulu?s violent ex boy friend Ray, played by a never-
> drink myself to sleep at night. If I wasn?t with someone, I was an
> unhappy girl.?
>
> Every ?What the Hell Happened? article includes at least one ?big
> year?. In Griffith?s case, that year was 1988 which included the
>
> Later that year, she appeared in Mike Figgis? directorial debut,
> Harrison Ford and Sigourney Weaver in Mike Nichols? comedy, Working
She was very very sexy in Fear City.
--
David Barnett
@z8g2000yqo.googlegroups.com>, tmc...@gmail.com says...
>
> http://lebeauleblog.com/2013/01/05/what-the-hell-happened-to-melanie-griffith/
>
> Posted by lebeau
>
> Melanie Griffith is the daughter of Hollywood icon, Tippi Hedren, an
> Academy Award nominee and Golden Globe winner. She rose to the A-list
> in the 80s working with directors like Brian De Palma, Mike Nichols
> and Jonathan Demme. But after a promising decade, she stumbled and
> fell off the a-List in the 90s.
>
> What the hell happened?
>
> Griffith was born into show business. Her mother, Tippi Hedren, is
> best known for the films she made with Alfred Hitchcock, The Birds and
> Marnie. Hedren suffered numerous indignities at the hands of the
> legendary director. Griffith was a child at the time and remembers a
> strange gift from Hitchcock.
>
> ?It was, like, a coffin box? and I opened it up and in it was a doll
> http://lebeauleblog.com/2013/01/05/what-the-hell-happened-to-melanie-griffith/
>
> Posted by lebeau
>
> Melanie Griffith is the daughter of Hollywood icon, Tippi Hedren, an
> Academy Award nominee and Golden Globe winner. She rose to the A-list
> in the 80s working with directors like Brian De Palma, Mike Nichols
> and Jonathan Demme. But after a promising decade, she stumbled and
> fell off the a-List in the 90s.
>
> What the hell happened?
>
> Griffith was born into show business. Her mother, Tippi Hedren, is
> best known for the films she made with Alfred Hitchcock, The Birds and
> Marnie. Hedren suffered numerous indignities at the hands of the
> legendary director. Griffith was a child at the time and remembers a
> strange gift from Hitchcock.
>
> of my mother from The Birds? It was, like, made by the studio. Can
> you imagine the psychological effect (of that)? He was a very weird
> guy.?
>
> That?s for sure. Later in her career, Griffith would go on to appear
> in an episode of the TV show, Alfred Hitchcock Presents, in the 80s.
>
> Griffith?s biological father was also in ?the biz? as an actor and
>
> producer. Her parents divorced when she was only four years old. Her
> father re-married a model/actress and her mother re-married an agent/
> producer. Given this upbringing, it is no surprise that Griffith
> started doing commercials at age 12.
>
> At age 14, Griffith began dating her mother?s 22-year-old Harrad
> father re-married a model/actress and her mother re-married an agent/
> producer. Given this upbringing, it is no surprise that Griffith
> started doing commercials at age 12.
>
> Experiment co-star, Don Johnson. Griffith had an uncredited cameo in
> the film. Griffith and Johnson were married in 1976. The marriage
> lasted only six moths.
>
> In 1975, Griffith started getting her first credited film roles. She
> appeared in three films that year. The Drowning, co-starred Paul
> Newman. Smile starred Bruce Dern. Her most significant role was in
> the neo-noir detective drama, Night Moves which starred Gene Hackman.
>
> Night Moves was not a success when it was released, but it has gained
> critical support over time. Many now consider it the last great film
> by director Arthur Penn. Night Moves is perhaps best known for
> Griffiths many nude scenes. She was reportedly only 17 when she
> filmed them.
>
> At the time, Griffith was living the show biz lifestyle. Actress
> Tatum O?Neal has claimed that, she and Griffith had a sexual encounter
> the film. Griffith and Johnson were married in 1976. The marriage
> lasted only six moths.
>
> In 1975, Griffith started getting her first credited film roles. She
> appeared in three films that year. The Drowning, co-starred Paul
> Newman. Smile starred Bruce Dern. Her most significant role was in
> the neo-noir detective drama, Night Moves which starred Gene Hackman.
>
> Night Moves was not a success when it was released, but it has gained
> critical support over time. Many now consider it the last great film
> by director Arthur Penn. Night Moves is perhaps best known for
> Griffiths many nude scenes. She was reportedly only 17 when she
> filmed them.
>
> At the time, Griffith was living the show biz lifestyle. Actress
> in a Paris hotel room while high on opium and hashish. O?Neal was
> only 12 and Griffith was 18.
>
> Throughout the late 70's, Griffith worked on TV movies, mini-series
> and small roles in film. She appeared in the movie Roar with her
> mother in 1978.
>
> In 1982, she married her second husband, actor Steven Bauer (best
> known as Manny Ribera in the Brian De Palma?s Scarface.) The couple
>
> Throughout the late 70's, Griffith worked on TV movies, mini-series
> and small roles in film. She appeared in the movie Roar with her
> mother in 1978.
>
> In 1982, she married her second husband, actor Steven Bauer (best
> had a son together in 1985 and divorced in 1987.
>
> Griffith?s big break came in Brian De Palma?s 1984 thriller, Body
>
> Double.
>
> De Palma was a ?student of Hitchcock? which is sort of a polite way of
> saying that he ripped off the master of suspense shamelessly. Body
> Double borrows liberally from Hitchcock classics, Vertigo and Rear
> Window.
>
> Griffith played a porn star who, you know what, I?m not going to
> Double borrows liberally from Hitchcock classics, Vertigo and Rear
> Window.
>
> explain the plot. It?s silly and anything I can tell you about it
> would constitute a spoiler. She played a porn star, okay?
>
> Originally, De Palma intended to cast an actual porn star in the
> role. But you have to imagine the idea of casting Tippi Hedren?s
>
> Originally, De Palma intended to cast an actual porn star in the
> daughter was too much for the Hitchcock-obsessed director to resist.
>
> Body Double was mostly panned by critics. And understandably so.
> It?s hard not to laugh at the film?s excesses. It?s hard to tell
>
> Body Double was mostly panned by critics. And understandably so.
> whether or not De Palma intends this as a Hitchcock satire or an
> homage. While most critics dismissed the film, many singled out
> Griffith for praise.
>
> The movie flopped at the box office. But it developed a cult
> following on video.
>
> It is seriously ridiculous. Just watch Vertigo instead.
>
> In 1984, Griffith starred opposite Lando Calrissian (Billy Dee
> Williams for the geek-impaired) and Tom Berenger in the sexy thriller,
> Fear City.
>
> Griffith played a stripper. Are we sensing a trend here?
>
> In 1985, Griffith starred opposite Jeff Daniels in Jonathan Demme?s
> homage. While most critics dismissed the film, many singled out
> Griffith for praise.
>
> The movie flopped at the box office. But it developed a cult
> following on video.
>
> It is seriously ridiculous. Just watch Vertigo instead.
>
> In 1984, Griffith starred opposite Lando Calrissian (Billy Dee
> Williams for the geek-impaired) and Tom Berenger in the sexy thriller,
> Fear City.
>
> Griffith played a stripper. Are we sensing a trend here?
>
> quirky comedy, Something Wild.
>
> Griffith plays a variation on the manic pixie dream girl who turns
> Daniels? life upside down. Daniels plays an uptight banker who
>
> Griffith plays a variation on the manic pixie dream girl who turns
> Griffith catches in the midst of a dine-and-dash. Griffith?s Lulu is
> intrigued by this relatively mild rebellion and takes Daniels? Charlie
> on a series of adventures.
>
> The great thing about Something Wild is that it takes an unexpected
> dark turn in the film?s final act. Usually in these movies, the hero
>
> The great thing about Something Wild is that it takes an unexpected
> learns to loosen up through the irresponsible and self-destructive
> behavior of a beautiful stranger.
>
> That?s true here too, but the couple?s actions have real life
> behavior of a beautiful stranger.
>
> repercussions when Lulu?s violent ex boy friend Ray, played by a never-
> scarier Ray Liotta, arrives on the scene.
>
> Something Wild is sexy, scary, romantic, dark, funny and appropriately
> enough wild. Critics responded to its quirky charms even if
> mainstream audiences didn?t know what to make of it.
>
> Something Wild is sexy, scary, romantic, dark, funny and appropriately
> enough wild. Critics responded to its quirky charms even if
>
> Griffith, Daniels and Liotta were all nominated for Golden Globes for
> their performances. And Something Wild has developed a cult
> following.
>
> In 1987, Griffith divorced for the second time. She later admitted
> that this caused her to abuse liquor and cocaine. ?What I did was
> Griffith, Daniels and Liotta were all nominated for Golden Globes for
> their performances. And Something Wild has developed a cult
> following.
>
> In 1987, Griffith divorced for the second time. She later admitted
> drink myself to sleep at night. If I wasn?t with someone, I was an
> unhappy girl.?
>
> Every ?What the Hell Happened? article includes at least one ?big
> year?. In Griffith?s case, that year was 1988 which included the
> direct-to-video release of the sci-fi flick Cherry 2000 in which
> Griffith had really, really red hair.
>
> Cherry 2000 is about a future in which there are sex robots.
> Amazingly, Griffith does not play one. The movie was filmed in 1986
> and released to video after Griffith became a star.
>
> Seriously, how was she not a sex robot in this thing?
>
> Later that year, Griffith appeared in a small role as a trophy wife in
> Robert Redford?s The Milagro Beanfield War.
> Griffith had really, really red hair.
>
> Cherry 2000 is about a future in which there are sex robots.
> Amazingly, Griffith does not play one. The movie was filmed in 1986
> and released to video after Griffith became a star.
>
> Seriously, how was she not a sex robot in this thing?
>
> Later that year, Griffith appeared in a small role as a trophy wife in
>
> Later that year, she appeared in Mike Figgis? directorial debut,
> Stormy Monday opposite Sean Bean, Tommy Lee Jones and Sting.
>
> Stormy Monday was yet another sexy neo noir thriller. This time,
> Griffith played a waitress which I suppose is a step up from the
> strippers and prostitutes she had been playing up to this point in her
> career.
>
> Griffith?s career changed completely when she starred opposite
>
> Stormy Monday was yet another sexy neo noir thriller. This time,
> Griffith played a waitress which I suppose is a step up from the
> strippers and prostitutes she had been playing up to this point in her
> career.
>
> Harrison Ford and Sigourney Weaver in Mike Nichols? comedy, Working
She was very very sexy in Fear City.
--
David Barnett
WrongWayWade
Jan 8, 2013, 11:37:18 AM1/8/13
to
Dano wrote:
> "TMC" wrote in message
> news:6e5d32d0-57b6-4a4d...@z8g2000yqo.googlegroups.com...
>
> http://lebeauleblog.com/2013/01/05/what-the-hell-happened-to-melanie-griffith/
>
> Posted by lebeau
>
Every one of these 'what the hell happened' posts are insipid, implying that
> "TMC" wrote in message
> news:6e5d32d0-57b6-4a4d...@z8g2000yqo.googlegroups.com...
>
> http://lebeauleblog.com/2013/01/05/what-the-hell-happened-to-melanie-griffith/
>
> Posted by lebeau
>
every actor should have a carreer that is top of the heap from birth to
death. Of course not, so what? Fashions change.
As far as Melanie Griffith is concerned, whoever gave her that hideous lip
surgery ought to lose his license. Actually I have never seen a plastic
surgery on the lips that worked. I basically understand the fake boobs, but
how often do you see a beautiful women and say "If only her lips stuck out
more."
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