Happy Endings, Hasty Exits (1/?)
vj
not) of AU exits for companions. Given how random some of them were,
they could easily have settled down with any passing stranger. And
there are plenty of candidates...
Some, obviously, will be very silly. Some won't.
I don't know what got into me this weekend... Hmm...
***
1. Aftershock (Drabble)
(Some time between The Three Doctors and Carnival of Monsters) Jo
Grant: “But I don’t want to go to Metebelis III! I want to stay on
earth and marry Mike!”
*
There was a long period of silence that followed this announcement
outside the TARDIS (standing in its usual spot in the UNIT’s
laboratory).
Jo had her arms folded and a defiant tilt to her chin. Sergeant
Benton had only now managed to close his mouth after the bombshell
she’d dropped.
“Benton,” said the Brigadier eventually, coughing, “perhaps you’d be
kind enough to bring the captain round?”
He saluted. “Right, sir. Erm… What about the Doctor, sir?”
“Oh, leave him where he is. I’m sure he’ll recover.”
Jo pouted.
“Never mind, Miss Grant,” said the Brigadier and left them to it.
***
2. Double Take
(The Android Invasion) Sarah Jane: “I want to stay on earth and marry
Harry!”
*
“Don’t be ridiculous,” said the Doctor. “Marry Harry? Our Harry?”
Sarah nodded and took hold of Harry Sullivan’s hand. He had rather a
bemused expression on his face, but he said nothing.
“That’s just being silly,” the Doctor continued, still outraged.
“*Nobody’d* want to marry Harry!”
Harry raised an eyebrow. He was used to insults from the Doctor, but
that was going a bit far. “Apparently Sarah does,” he put in.
“Quiet, Harry. Now, I know a nice little planet in Cassiopeia…”
Sarah stared back at him. “Doctor, didn’t you hear what I just said?”
“Obviously, but I’ve got to make some attempt to bring you back to
your senses. You didn’t get a knock to the head when we landed, did
you?”
*
Once the Doctor had eventually flung his scarf over his shoulder,
slammed his hat on his head and stormed off in the biggest see-if-I-
care sulk Harry had yet seen, Sarah sagged down into the nearest chair
and put her head in her hands.
“Now,” he said, once they’d heard the sound of the TARDIS actually
leaving, “what is this about, old girl? I mean, I wasn’t going to let
you down in front of the Doctor and I know it’s been a confusing day,
but I’m sure I’d remember proposing.”
She huddled into the chair. “Oh, I’m sorry. Sometimes he’s just
impossible! Well, you know what he’s like.”
“Yes,” he agreed, having been forcibly reminded by that last little
round of insults. “Still, that’s no call to go round saying you’ll
marry me.”
Sarah sniffed. “I mean, I can’t spend the whole of my life trailing
around the universe after him, never knowing where I am or what’s
going on and telling him how wonderful he is. I’ve got a life of my
own – or I thought I had before I met him.”
“Of course you have,” he said encouragingly. “Coming down to earth’ll
be a bit of a shock, though.”
She swallowed. “I know.”
He wasn’t sure he was doing too well on the cheering-her-up front or
what was required, or what he was supposed to make (if anything) of
her excuse for leaving, but there were some things that didn’t
change. “How about dinner, old thing?”
“Don’t call me that,” she said half-heartedly. “Aren’t you supposed
to be on duty?”
He smiled. “Not since about ten minutes ago. And from what I
remember about life aboard the TARDIS, regular meals weren’t exactly a
feature.”
“True,” she agreed and smiled at him properly. She sat up. “Now that
you mention it, I’m starving.”
He pulled her back to her feet. “In that case, let’s feed you first
and worry about everything else after.”
“Harry,” she said, grinning back at him and tapping his chest lightly,
“I think that sounds like a plan. I hope you’ve got some money,
because I haven’t been near a bank in weeks.”
He opened the door for her. “Of course. Least I can do for my new
fiancée.”
*
After they’d had their meal and Harry escorted her home, he stopped
outside her house, deciding that he really had to tackle the red
letter question right here and now. “Sarah, don’t think I’m not
flattered, but you can’t start telling people that you’re going to
marry me. You could have just said you wanted to go home.”
“I suppose,” she admitted. She glanced away, biting her lip.
He was still waiting for her to laugh it off in some way. He didn’t
dare ask her why she’d said it. Doubtless, she’d only thought that
clumsy, wooden-headed Harry would think the whole thing as amusing as
she did… And she still wasn’t laughing. “Sarah? What if someone
else had heard you?”
“It’s not completely out of the question, is it?” she asked
eventually, quietly enough so that he doubted what he’d heard. “I
don’t mean to sound big-headed, but I did think -.”
He could have sworn the world span the wrong way around, the stars
under him and the paved pathway over his head, but when he looked,
everything was still as it had been. “No,” he managed, realising that
he was keeping her waiting for an answer. “I mean, yes. I think.”
Sarah looked up at him directly now. “Only I saw someone who wasn’t
you today. And I wanted the real you back around. All right?”
“Oh, that’s all right,” he said fervently, although he did consider
that she might be delirious, since she wasn’t completely making sense,
but she seemed lucid enough. “Quite all right. I’m happy to have the
real you around, too.”
She sighed. “Well, you could show it.”
“I could?” he echoed in momentary puzzlement and then caught her
meaning and obliged.
*
Afterwards, he said goodbye and turned to go and then wondered why she
was laughing helplessly at him.
She moved back to him and took his arm firmly. “I think I’d better
see you back to the taxi,” she told him. “The gate’s that way.”
“So it is,” he said, with a blush, but he had no objection to keeping
her close for a little bit longer.
It hadn’t been the best of days, but it was turning out to be a
wonderful evening.
***
3. Short Return
(I'm sorry, but though I tried to explain, Zoe just didn't get it...)
(The Invasion) Zoe: “I want to stay here and marry the Brigadier!”
*
The recipient of this abrupt proposal raised both eyebrows and
coughed.
“Um, Zoe?” said the Doctor. “Are you sure?”
Jamie stared.
The Brigadier took a hand. “Flattered as I obviously am, Miss
Herriot, I’m afraid I’m a married man. Legally at any rate.”
“Besides,” added Jamie with scorn, “you’d need a ladder just to kiss
him!”
Zoe reddened furiously.
“Otherwise, of course,” returned the Brigadier smoothly, although he
had a twinkle lurking in his eyes.
The Doctor clapped his hands together. “Well, that’s that, then.
Shall we be off?”
“Yes, please,” said Zoe, still an interesting colour. “How soon?”
***
Disclaimer: Again, I don't own Doctor Who, I just do strange things to
the characters from time to time. :-D
John Elliott
: (I'm sorry, but though I tried to explain, Zoe just didn't get it...)
Not exactly a lot of choice for Zoe in Season 6, is there? I suppose she
should be grateful it was the Brigadier and not Milo Clancey or General
Hermack.
Though she might have got more of a reaction if she'd said "I want to stay
here and marry Isobel!"
--
John Elliott
Thinks: This is what a nice clean life leads to. Hmm, why did I ever lead one?
-- Bluebottle, in the Goon Show
vj
here's the other half:
(In the end, I needed to nick the ending of this one to make up the
wordage.):
"In that case, I shall stay here and marry Isobel!"
*
The Brigadier only raised one eyebrow this time, but Jamie's face fell
into an expression of terminal puzzlement.
The Doctor led her to one side, his arm around her shoulders. "Zoe,
it’s the twentieth century. You'd have to wait around thirty years
for that. In any case, I suspect that nice young captain might
object." He coughed. "You know, if you wanted to stay, you could
have just said so, not started throwing proposals around right, left
and centre."
She whispered back, "I don't think I can *now*."
"No," he agreed and smiled at her. "I'm glad to hear it!"
***
John Elliott
: All right, just for you: Originally, it was a double drabble, and
: here's the other half:
Me and my big mouth :-)
Thanks for posting it, anyhow.
Daibhid Ceanaideach
Excellent. And inspiring (I'm afraid mine are even sillier.)
"But I don't want to go back to Earth, Doctor!" said Barbara, "I want to
stay on Skaro and marry Ganatus!"
Ian's jaw dropped.
"Nonsense," the Doctor spluttered, "You expect to stay on an alien world,
hmm? You do know those radiation tablets won't last forever?"
"Grandfather's right," Susan added, "Besides, you hardly know him. You
can't marry someone just because you've fought the Daleks together!"
***
"Doctor," said Jack. "I want to stay on Earth and marry Rose Tyler! Or
Mickey Jones. Ah, the hell with it, both of them."
***
"Doctor," said Benny, "I want to stay on Earth and marry Jaso... no, hang
on..."
"We've been through this," the Doctor said, poking his umbrella through
the shattered remains of the fourth wall,"It's supposed to be someone you
*didn't* leave me to marry in standard continuity." He raised an eyebrow.
"It's not like you're short of candidates."
Benny glared at him. "I think I take offence at that. If anyone *else*
needs me for a story, I'll be in the Round." And with that, she flounced
out.
(Okay, we need another Seventh companion for this one. Volunteers? Ah,
thank you, Mel.)
"Doctor" said Mel, "I want to stay on Earth and marry Goronwy!"
The Doctor shrugged. "Well, why not?" he said, "It makes about as much
sense as who you *did* leave with..."
--
Dave
"All those with psychokinesis, raise my hand."
The Room With No Doors, Kate Orman
Paul Andinach
> "Grandfather's right," Susan added, "Besides, you hardly know him.
> You can't marry someone just because you've fought the Daleks
> together!"
> "We've been through this," the Doctor said, poking his umbrella
> through the shattered remains of the fourth wall
Paul
--
The Pink Pedanther
vj
(I like the Ganatus one, though I was planning on ignoring anyone
Barbara flirts with because, you know, the world might split in two if
she doesn't leave with Ian...)
Here, have one back I'm *not* doing that might even manage to be
sillier. Well, just possibly:
Mawdryn Undead - Tegan: "I want to stay here and marry the Brigadier!"
*
"Which one?" asked the Doctor eventually.
*
:-p
Oh, drat, now I'm going to have to apologise to the Brigadier
*again*...
Daibhid Ceanaideach
> Heh!! Great!
Glad you liked them.
> (I like the Ganatus one, though I was planning on ignoring anyone
> Barbara flirts with because, you know, the world might split in two if
> she doesn't leave with Ian...)
It probably says a lot about me that my *immediate* thought on reading that
was "Who's a suitably random person for *Ian* to end up with?"
> Here, have one back I'm *not* doing that might even manage to be
> sillier. Well, just possibly:
Very nice.
Daibhid Ceanaideach
> Nice! Especially these two bits:
Glad you liked them.
(And I was rather pleased with Susan's punchline, since I didn't have it in
mind when I started; it just happened.)
John Elliott
"Tell me about the Monk," Sara said.
The Doctor frowned. "Hmmph. He's utterly irresponsible-- no better than a
spoiled child. Never sees the consequences of his actions. He needs to be
placed under proper supervision."
"Yes," Sara said. "That's the impression I gained." She held out her hand.
"Goodbye, Doctor, Steven."
The Doctor and Steven exchanged baffled glances. "What?"
"I shall marry the Monk, and make a responsible citizen of him."
Steven looked at her. She was as calm, efficient and deadly as ever, her
uniform neatly pressed, her blaster ready to hand.
"Does he know this yet?" he asked.
vj
I think I can spy of Monk lying dead of shock and horror somewhere.
It's Mel and Glitz all over again, isn't it?
:-D