Kool-Aid Kicks Ass
Charles Bogner
I was five years old, and my mom bought one of those little tiny
packs, and said, "Let's make Kool-Aid!" I didn't know what she was
talking about. So I went along and we made it. It took a while, because
I accidentaly spilled a little of that sugar stuff, and she had to scrape
it back onto her hand, then put it in the water. I stared at the
lustrous red color. As my trembling five-year-old hands both reached
around the cup and brought it to my mouth and dropped in...my mouth was
EXPLODING in the taste of it. I was so shocked, I drank the rest in
almost one gulp. Ever since than, I always drink Kool-Aid, over Coke,
Pepsi, Sprite, etc. I had Hi-C, and thought it GREATLY inferior. If you
have any other memorable Kool-Aid experiences, such as the one above,
PLEASE POST IT!!!
rushz
"The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of
the face."------Jack Handey
Robert Lucien Joseph Buisson
> I'll never forget my first sip of Kool-Aid...
>If you
>have any other memorable Kool-Aid experiences, such as the one above,
>PLEASE POST IT!!!
I guess my favourite Kool-aid moment has less to do with drinking
kool-aid than sending away to the wacky warehouse for the first time. I
ordered a watch when I was 15. Every day for 6 weeks I would run home
from school and go to the mail box, hoping that my watch showed up.
Finally it arrived. It was certainly a thing of beauty. It said
"product of Kraft foods" on the back, and had a digital kool-aid man and
a digital hour, minute and second hand. It was bright red, and was
actually a pretty reliable time piece. I liked it so much that when the
hologram watch was introduced, I got one of those too. BTW, when I wore
my watch to school the next day, I WAS THE KOOLEST PERSON THERE.
EVERYONE WANTED MY WATCH, and thought it was the neatest thing they had
ever seen. Anyhow, this is one of my favourite kool-aid moments from my
twisted childhood.
Rob Buisson ToO
--
| Robert L. J. Buisson | "There are two official languages |
| Labour Studies (III) | in this country, and I don't |
| University of Manitoba | speak none of 'em." |
| e-mail: umbu...@cc.umanitoba.ca | -Eugene Whelan |
Jerry McKune
UM> have any other memorable Kool-Aid experiences, such as the one
UM> above, PLEASE POST IT!!!
Well, I have two memorable Kool-Aid experiences...one is from
childhood, the other is from my teenage years.
The first was when I was about ten. There was this kid in my class who
saw Scarface, and from then on he would snort anything...ANYTHING to
be like Tony Montana(drug lord character in Scarface played by Al
Pacino). You name it, he would snort it...Coffee Mate, Cremora,
powdered sugar, cornstarch, flower(whole wheat and bleached), Sweet
and Low, Equal, you name it he snorted it. He once tried to snort
Johnson's Baby Powder, but didn't like the after taste, so he stuck
with food products. Every day it was like a new challenge. We would
bring in food products for this kid to snort at recess. We'd all
gather round and enjoy ourselves as this kid turned his nose into a
garbage dump. Well, one day this girl brought a pack of Kool-aid, you
know, the big sugar-filled ones, ready to mix, just add water, etc.?
Well, this kid was pretty confident of himself, and said that he would
snort the whole package...quite a feat for a kid all of maybe 75
pounds. Being ten, and not really considering what it would feel like
to suck something up our noses, no one really thought of the
consequences of snorting such a granular substance as sugary Kool-aid
drink mix. Jack, the snorting fiend, carefully made 4 big lines of the
Kool-aid. It was Green Lime...back when it was widely made, now I only
see it on occasion in the 'add sugar' packets. Well, Jack pulled out
his straw, inserted it in his nose, and sucked a big line of the
Kool-aid. The next thing we know, Jack is rolling on the ground,
screaming with a straw stuck up his nose, blood pouring out of his
nostril, and green ooze on his nose and mouth. The teacher immediately
came running out, and gasped. When she found out what was going on she
picked up Jack and took him to the nurse. When she came back, she made
us all go back to class and sit with our heads down while she called
our parents. Then she made us all go home and write 150 times "I am
very sorry for encouraging Jack to do bad things." and we each had to
come up with 3 reasons why what Jack did was bad. This of course was
WAY back before "Just Say No" and the D.A.R.E. programs. When teachers
talked about drug prevention they meant "don't leave the cap off so
you baby brother can eat 50 Tylenol." Our teachers and parents were
shocked that a 10 year old would contemplate snorting anything.
Anyway, to make an even longer story short, Jack came back the next
day, and I am not kidding when I tell you that he spit bright green
lugies for the next week...which we all thought was pretty amazing as
well. Aaah..to be a sick and demented 10 year old...what a life!