Google Groups no longer supports new Usenet posts or subscriptions. Historical content remains viewable.
Dismiss

[s 1] FluffyRocker's World Tour

2 views
Skip to first unread message

Punk Bunny!

unread,
Nov 16, 1999, 3:00:00 AM11/16/99
to
Bunnymovers are one of the most advanced robot transports known to
rabbits. They've got safety features up to here. The guidance controls
are nearly impossible to reach, let along reprogram, and the anti-tamper
devices have enough voltage to send a can of spam into orbit.

None of which could stop PunkBunny. She'd hotwired one before.

"Hang loose, kiddies," PB called behind her as she made the last
connection under the dash. "Chick's gonna billy you down a detour."

Twenty-three school age kits, who thought they were headed for
FluffyTeacher's spring grade, hung onto their seats as light arced between
PB's paws and the mover leapt into the transit tunnel like a ferret with a
hotfoot.

PB turned back to check on the buns that were following her; they had
leapt into a mover of their own, and lights were flashing through the front
windows as she rounded the first bend. Clawing at her improvised controls,
she leaned the mover into a tight intersection with a cross tunnel. Behind
her, kits began crying and flopping around like lint in a dryer, if the
dryer was shooting at sixty miles an hour through unlit tunnels half a mile
beneath the Rocky mountains.

With a practiced paw, PunkBunny flipped on the WalkBun on her waist and
turned the volume full blast. Crying kits were headaches she didn't need
right now.

/She's got no reasons for the things she does,
The veiled flirting that she throws at fudds.
A human's cattle and a fudd's her stallion,
Go sign yourself up for the Black Batallion.../

The heavy bass line relaxed her, and she let the mover coast for a
breath before checking the rear view again. Dimly, she saw the outline of
another mover in the tunnel behind her. "Who the fluff *are* these
thumpers?", the doe swore.

Checking her WalkBun's time display, she noted there were twelve minutes
before she had to show up for her new job. Hraka.

/A summer silflay when I went insane,
She said 'You're drafted' and I said 'No way!'
They're searching clover fields and alfalfa,
I'm running frightened from a crazy alpha!

Daphnie SA-ys, "It's just a little toe!"
Daphnie SA-ys, "Now get it. Right."
Daphnie SA-ys, "Fluff up a little, doe...
We make ourselves up, to bring 'em all down!"
Get a toe, get a toe, get a toe! Get a toe, get a toe, get a toe!
When the world is coming down on me, I get a toe!/

A Bunnymover being more of a subway line than a means of personal
transport, there usually aren't many movers in the system; PB knew that
losing these spuds in traffic was going to be a problem. Then again, there
was a place where traffic should be going billy. Heading straight to work
might not be a bad idea.

Tapping wires together, she made the mover spin into the Loveland
turnoff. As her pursuers shot after her, she rocketed through the 3D
cloverleaf and got back onto the main mover system, pointed back towards
Denverwarren.

It took a few miles before the pursuing mover appeared behind her again.
PunkBunny grinned. "You spuds are hot," PunkBunny grinned, "But you ain't
gonna be hot enough. Natch."

/I've got no reason for the spam I've nibbled,
and it's digesting now so please don't quibble.
There's lots of meat there on a human toe
to plump the figure of a modern doe./

Wrestling with her makeshift controls, PB nearly missed the turnoff for
Denverwarren's Mile Wide Cavern. The first other traffic puttered along in
front of her; a fat limo, hugging the wall. She got into the dodge lane
and shot past it, getting ready to kill power.

/She's got no reasons for the things she does,
The veiled flirting that she throws at fudds.
And while we're fighting over human mutton,
She's got a paw above the big red button!/

A few more vehicles were sitting in front of the loading dock, big empty
obstacles for PB to swerve violently around. Finally the tour bus loomed
in front of her; the doe yanked a power cord and watched the lights sputter
out, as her mover coasted into the space between the tour bus and the
offloaded equipment.

Barely a bump. The kits rocked her worse when she opened the door and
let them out onto the platform. Little pests.

/Daphnie SA-ys, "It's just a little toe!"
Daphnie SA-ys, "Now get it. Right."
Daphnie SA-ys, "Fluff up a little, doe...
We make ourselves up 'cause they LOVE IT!"
Get a toe, get a toe, get a toe.../

/When the world is coming down on me, I get a tooooooe!/

With kits milling around her -- most crying, some hiding among the band
equipment -- PB switched off her WalkBun and looked around for somebun
else. She found just what she needed; two gunmetal gray bucks wearing dark
shades, lounging by the tour bus. "Elmer!"

The rabbits turned and hopped closer. "Yeah, PB, what's up?"

The doe turned to watch the mover platform. A battered mover, with
lights dimmed and windows dark, slid into view from the direction of the
expressway. Passing her, it picked up speed and rolled away back out along
the stadium loop.

"Just some grungers wanting to mosh, Brothers", PB said, smoothing her
dewlap and trying to settle down. Adrenaline rocks. "Boyz, do chick a
favor? Get these kits back into the mover and see them down to the Teach?
Figure they're late for class."

"Uh, we've got a sound check in twenty..."

"PB'll take care of that," she fluffed. Hopping off towards the
security pavillion, she called "Thanks boyz" over her shoulder.

Silently, PB hoped there wouldn't be any fans as serious-looking as the
two who chased her. But if she saw any that tight, she made a mental note
to bust some fluff.

--
PUNK Bunny!! "SPAM the world, and *Mosh On Meat*!"

0 new messages