WIDEBEAM Re: A Public Service Announcement
Geoffrey Brent
***Engage widebeam y/n: y***
***Encrypt y/n: n***
The Colective wrote:
> artypoos wrote:
>
> > (1) If you do that in front of my doefriend ever again, I will
treat you
> > to a very special anatomy lesson, free of charge. Topics will include
> > The Anatomy Of The Eye, Lapine Nociceptors: An In-Depth Study,
> > Prevention Of Voluntary Self-Termination, and Rasputin Didn't Know
> > How Easy He Had It.
> > (2) 'Hyoscime' is my _especial_, private name for my beloved.
>
> > You are not Family. You are not on the Keepers List. You will not use
> > that name again, not even in a strictly botanical context, or I will
> > become very irritated indeed and you will discover some botanical facts
> > from the hen's point of view.
>
> .....
Have it your way, then. I offered you a peaceful solution...
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:
The Four are pleased to announce that a bounty has been placed on the
head of the one known as 'cuddlebunni'. The reward covers:
US$200,000 reward. This may be taken in US dollars, foreign currency
equivalent, tequila, carrots, or dandelions, as nominated by the winner.
May also be exchanged for Godless High Tech from our current catalogue,
at double value. Rare and collectible three-DVD 'Trampoline Playtime'
collection given away free with any purchase of value $300 or more.
Payment of expenses, up to US$200 000, upon presentation of itemised
receipts.
One (1) individual to be placed on the Keepers List, at the winner's
nomination. Said Cuddlebunni not eligible for this listing.
Other incentives may be provided - contact us for details. We encourage
other organisations to match our reward. Note: rewards offered are for
delivery of said Cuddlebunni, deceased, to Dunwich. Half rewards will be
provided for proof of death without body; double rewards for live
delivery of said Cuddlebunni.
***End and Transmit***
***Tightbeam to Kevvie's Fluffy Masters***
I understand your symp has no little proficiency in technical matters,
and that you are aware of the nibble notice already placed on the
forementioned mockery of a rabbit. I would be interested to discuss the
possibility of cooperating in locating said beast.
***End and Transmit***
Art Black, Lord Famine
The Colective
arty sweetums luvingly wrote:
> FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:
>
> The Four are pleased to announce that a bounty has been placed on the
> head of the one known as 'cuddlebunni'. The reward covers:
<boinkfluff> oh yeh, they want me! they want me!!!!!!!!
<undervalued offer cuddled>
> Other incentives may be provided - contact us for details. We encourage
> other organisations to match our reward. Note: rewards offered are for
> delivery of said Cuddlebunni, deceased, to Dunwich. Half rewards will be
> provided for proof of death without body; double rewards for live
> delivery of said Cuddlebunni.
<bouncybouncy> whoohoo! given both yew and henbanes attempts to chat me
up with sweet words and poetry, and knowing of fourier courting rituals,
its obvious that yew are angling for some sort of threesom.
<thoughtfullfluff> now, normaly i'm only interested in does, but.... ive
heard yew are way ky00t!!! <bouncehopsspin> so perhaps i might make an
exception in yor case <winkfuff>......<blows kiss>
*bunnihugs*bunnisuggles*bunnicuddles*pooflewiggles*snugglecuddles*
i luv yew alll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
cuddlebunni - "one bun to unite them all"
Mst. Sgt. E. Totten, Liaison officer
>
>***Engage widebeam y/n: y***
>***Encrypt y/n: n***
As Liaison Officer for Ft. Roger Williams, I have been authorized by
Colonel George Whittier to offer the following inducements to any Fudd
or pro-Fudd organization, group or individual:
200 ea Poppet, devilbunny w/ head release mechanism and blood
reservoir in body cavity.
(Training device used to teach how to *pop* devilbunny heads. Can be
re-used, and the body reservoir can be filled with blood or similar
for realistic spray)
In addition, we will offer gratis training to troops in number to 100
from any AoF base that can provide proof of the death of the above
subject, "cuddlebunni"
Individuals and less structured groups such as the Wanderers are
encouraged to contact me personally for offers geared toward their
needs.
Finally, to quote the commanding officer:
"What the hell. If the enemy bags it first, we'll ship a gross of
Snapple to any address they provide, other than Fudd or pro-Fudd
locations."
With sincerest wishes for a happy and successful hunting of the
cunning hare,
Mst. Sgt. E. Totten
HoCH-RI/AoF-RI
Ft. Roger Williams, RI
Terrence Deuce O'Connor
<3D17E217...@unsw.edu.NOS.PAM.au>:
>The Four are pleased to announce that a bounty has been placed on the
>head of the one known as 'cuddlebunni'. The reward covers:
>
>US$200,000 reward. This may be taken in US dollars, foreign currency
>Payment of expenses, up to US$200 000, upon presentation of itemised
>receipts.
[s]
"Go tell Requisitions that I want a price quote for enough fuel, parts, and
ordnance to carpet-bomb an entire state to a kill depth of thirty meters.
They can assume Kralkco supplies if it'll keep costs down."
"I thought the fires were supposed to get it?"
"Yeah, Intel says they had the map upside down when they did the first
triangulations, and that it's nowhere near there. [PiG-13] spooks."
"You *know* there's no way the reward would cover the cost. You'd have to
completely neutralize at least five states to have a chance of getting it."
"I know, but if it offsets the cost, we can pick up some extra from AoF
funds and grateful citizens everywhere. I'm also figuring we can ignore a
week's tequila bill after all the people who'll want to buy us drinks.
Hell, even the mentats might chip in."
"Can't argue with that. You want that quote itemized?"
"If you can get 'em to."
[/s]
ed
day of Tue, 25 Jun 2002 19:10:03 +1000:
>i luv yew alll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>
>cuddlebunni - "one bun to unite them all"
muttley, that paragon of Ferrotti, inquires if the way to dispose of
cuddlebunni is then to throw it into a volcano?
ed
--
edh...@equus.demon.co.uk _////
http://www.equus.demon.co.uk/adbdir/ednobun.html o_/o ///
For anti-devilbunny support in Carcassonne and __\ ///__
the Camargue
cliff86
> muttley, that paragon of Ferrotti, inquires if the way to dispose of
> cuddlebunni is then to throw it into a volcano?
>
> ed
If you weren't the polar opposite of a corporate
fiend, you could make a lot of money off that
concept.
Agent-X
--
Think of the Pay Per View earnings alone. Don
King would slit his wrists out of envy!
Callie Bunny
I've seen the various offers of reward for your demise in addition to
the Nibble Notices (tm).
(droopears) It's terrible.
However, should things get too warm out there, whereever you are,
cuddles, remember my offer. My warren would still take you in.
There are several here with a price on their heads for opposing the
status quo. We have no intention to paw any of them over, *EVER*.
(STOMP!)
Callie at VoloBog Warren
*****END TIGHTBEAM*****
Geoffrey Brent
> muttley, that paragon of Ferrotti, inquires if the way to dispose of
> cuddlebunni is then to throw it into a volcano?
Works for me. Oh, FWIW, bounty is also payable in cashews
and/or whatever it is that Ferrotti use for exchange.
Art Black, Lord Famine
Geoffrey Brent
>>The Four are pleased to announce that a bounty has been placed on the
>>head of the one known as 'cuddlebunni'. The reward covers:
>>
>
> <boinkfluff> oh yeh, they want me! they want me!!!!!!!!
>
> <undervalued offer cuddled>
Hey, it's what I had available at the time. If you think it
should be higher, you're very welcome to contribute. I've
received one-for-two matching donations from three Fudd
bases already.
> <bouncybouncy> whoohoo! given both yew and henbanes attempts to chat me
> up with sweet words and poetry, and knowing of fourier courting rituals,
> its obvious that yew are angling for some sort of threesom.
> <thoughtfullfluff> now, normaly i'm only interested in does, but.... ive
> heard yew are way ky00t!!! <bouncehopsspin> so perhaps i might make an
> exception in yor case <winkfuff>......<blows kiss>
Your place or ours?
Art Black, Lord Famine
Kevin Blackburn
<g.b...@unsw.edu.NOS.PAM.au> writes
>***Tightbeam to Kevvie's Fluffy Masters***
That would be me <bouncebounce>
>
>I understand your symp has no little proficiency in technical matters,
We don't let him anywhere near BUNIX <poofle> He is getting pretty
clever at SMTP protocol abuse, and his S/MIME is professional quality*,
but that doesn't seem to be what's in use.
>and that you are aware of the nibble notice already placed on the
>forementioned mockery of a rabbit.
Oh yes. I could query my esteemed American colleagues' enthusiasm in
this case. But I won't <poofle>
> I would be interested to discuss the possibility of cooperating in
>locating said beast.
I believe that a Ms Richard is known to you, and has all we are prepared
to release to yourselves.
In this sole case, good hunting to you.
Mentat Cottontail, HR
>
>***End and Transmit***
--
Kevin Blackburn Ke...@fairbruk.demon.co.uk
(*) Tis' to! Well, the S/MIME bit, anyway. I don't think my ASN.1 would have
broken.
Jessica "Jazz" Masterson
> The Four are pleased to announce that a bounty has been placed on the
> head of the one known as 'cuddlebunni'. The reward covers:
>
> US$200,000 reward. This may be taken in US dollars, foreign currency
> equivalent, tequila, carrots, or dandelions, as nominated by the winner.
> May also be exchanged for Godless High Tech from our current catalogue,
> at double value.
Internal Notice to the Wanderers:
Any Wanderer collecting the above bounty using only their own equipment can
collect the entire reward for themselves. Any Wanderer collecting the
bounty using signed-out Wanderer equipment pays 30% of the reward to the
motor pool fund, and 10% to pay for the celebrations afterwards.
Jessica "Jazz" Masterson
--
Commandrix of the Wanderers
Ambitious Wench
> Internal Notice to the Wanderers:
>
> Any Wanderer collecting the above bounty using only their own equipment can
> collect the entire reward for themselves. Any Wanderer collecting the
> bounty using signed-out Wanderer equipment pays 30% of the reward to the
> motor pool fund, and 10% to pay for the celebrations afterwards.
>
> Jessica "Jazz" Masterson
Ms. Masterson,
Col. Whittier authorized me to contact you regarding cooperating with
your team in this effort to our mutual benefit. Would you be
interested in the use of our airstrip, and maintainance facility with
berthing space in our barracks? I'm sure you'd like to be sure that
your aircraft were up to any long distance trips before mission
commencment. Please reply by encrypted tightbeam for landing
coordinates.
Mst. Sgt. E. Totten
Liaison Officer
Ft. Roger Williams, RI
[s]
"Olly says he will take the Snap-On tools with him when he moves the
Beaver to the auxilary hanger."
"Good. We don't have enough in the budget to replace them, and you
know how much effort he puts into tool control. What about the motor
pool?"
"Not to worry, Prescott has the tool crib all secure. They can
borrow, but they will have to leave an in-kind deposit. Besides, they
are all cheapos, potmetal. No big if they are lost. Not worth
stealing because they break too easy."
[/s]
The Colective
snagels wrote:
> > <undervalued offer cuddled>
>
> Hey, it's what I had available at the time. If you think it
> should be higher, you're very welcome to contribute. I've
> received one-for-two matching donations from three Fudd
> bases already.
<ky00tfluff> poor mr art, so cash strapped. i could easily double yor
offer with my resources for anybun to hunt yew down, but why bother? yew
arnt worth it, and the path of ky00t is the way of luv.
i luv yew mr black *bunnihugs*
i feel safe in the knowledge that yor reward for me will never be
claimed.... nature will sheild me from yor technology, and the inle
cursed bunnytech <stomp>
<other stuff cuddled>
> Your place or ours
<ponderfluff> oh decisions descisions! yew know... i want my first time
to be special <solemnfluff> (whadda ya expect for a bun that didnt reach
sexual maturity till after reaching the meadow?)
cuddlebunni - "little wolfskin boots, and clove cigarettes. an erotic
funeral, for which shes dressed.."
Geoffrey Brent
> <ky00tfluff> poor mr art, so cash strapped.
Liquidity's always the issue, you know how it is.
> i could easily double yor
> offer with my resources for anybun to hunt yew down, but why bother?
Ah, the old "I am so powerful I could snuff you out in an
instant, but *cue unconvincing excuses*." It's been a while
since I heard _that_ one.
> yew
> arnt worth it, and the path of ky00t is the way of luv.
An interesting claim from one who quite deliberately went
out of his way to cause pain to my Henbane. You'll forgive
me if I view your rhetoric in the light of your actions.
> i luv yew mr black *bunnihugs*
"Love"? If you really loved me, you'd abstain from attempts
to nauseate me.
> i feel safe in the knowledge that yor reward for me will never be
> claimed....
*shrug* You die, you don't die... I win either way.
[S] "Oh, yes, I do." There was a soft *snick* as Art
shut the safe door on a small piece of paper.
"Who are you talk- oh. *That*." Henbane scowled up at
the monitor, then tensed and leapt onto the desk. "And
what was that you so carefully tucked away?"
"See for yourself." He flicked the dial right, left,
right again, and showed her the paper.
"Wanderer stationery? Love, why are you buying a 'high
field' with a... a 'dead pool' in it? Though it *does*
sound awfully romantic."
"Think of it as an investment."
"Annual yield?" She snuggled against his arm.
"Oh, about... five to four."
[/S]
> <ponderfluff> oh decisions descisions! yew know... i want my first time
> to be special <solemnfluff> (whadda ya expect for a bun that didnt reach
> sexual maturity till after reaching the meadow?)
>
> cuddlebunni - "little wolfskin boots, and clove cigarettes. an erotic
> funeral, for which shes dressed.."
Yes, that song makes a very appropriate love theme for you.
Art Black, Lord Famine
The Colective
****************return tightcuddlebeam****************
**************furry fury encryption enguaged**********
> I've seen the various offers of reward for your demise in addition to
> the Nibble Notices (tm).
<nodpoofle> aye lass, not the first, and undoubtedly not the last
> (droopears) It's terrible.
<comfortingfluff> its ok, realy. if all the rewards that were out on my
head from people who are so shortsighted and prejudice that the thought
of my mere exsistance was an affront to the universe were claimed....
the world economy would collapse.
> However, should things get too warm out there, whereever you are,
> cuddles, remember my offer. My warren would still take you in.
*bunnihugs* i apreciate the offer callie, i realy do. <solemfluff>
considering that this seems to be a game where enemies unite against a
common foe, the risks are higher than usual. considering some of the
players involved (the wanders, the four, the aof *and* the odd warren)
my comming to volo bog would put the entire warren in danger. most of
these people are completely insane, with no regard for teaties or
morality, and would not hesitate to vaporise or otherwise destroy the
entire warren, bucks, does and kits alike, just to get a single bun.
<thoughfulleartwitch> i live in the meadow with the blessing of the
traditional owners of this land. it is to them, sacred ground, and there
is a certain power to this place. it has remained a hidden for
centuries, and the more advanced the technology used to find it, the
harder it resist. i think for the moment i am safer here, with only the
natural preditors to avoid.
> There are several here with a price on their heads for opposing the
> status quo. We have no intention to paw any of them over, *EVER*.
> (STOMP!)
<happybounce> it is good to see that there is some place left as
sanctuary from those who would opress us and enslave!!!
cuddlebunni
**************furry fury encryption disenguaged***********
********************tightcuddlebeam off*******************
cuddlebunni - "it feels so empty without me...."
(ok guys...i promice....i wont ever quote eminem again)
Ambitious Wench
> callie bunny wrote:
>
>
> ****************return tightcuddlebeam****************
> **************furry fury encryption enguaged**********
> **************furry fury encryption disenguaged***********
> ********************tightcuddlebeam off*******************
>
> cuddlebunni - "it feels so empty without me...."
> (ok guys...i promice....i wont ever quote eminem again)
Too late, Fluffer. See my additional offer entitled "Sweetening the pot".
That's for having the REALLY bad taste to quote "melt in your mouth" boy.
Ambitious Wench
Callie Bunny
>callie bunny wrote:
****************return tightcuddlebeam****************
**************furry fury encryption enguaged**********
>> cuddles, remember my offer. My warren would still take you in.
>my comming to volo bog would put the entire warren in danger. most of
>these people are completely insane, with no regard for teaties or
(shrugfluff) What's one more wanted bun in the warren? The Nibble
Notices on my head come from the likes of FluffyTeacher of
Denverwarren and CrimsonPaw at DEWComm among others. The others here
that have death threats all have been issued by 'powerful' buns. The
warren would be in no more danger with your presence then it already
is.
><thoughfulleartwitch> i live in the meadow with the blessing of the
>traditional owners of this land. it is to them, sacred ground, and there
>is a certain power to this place. it has remained a hidden for
>centuries, and the more advanced the technology used to find it, the
>harder it resist. i think for the moment i am safer here, with only the
>natural preditors to avoid.
I'm glad you're happy, cuddlebunni, but don't you get lonely out
there? At least if you came to visit, maybe, (shrugfluff) maybe you'd
find somebunny who'd be happy to return to that meadow with you.
You've said it yourself, life is sacred. However, if you don't share
that life with somebun else and help bring new life into the world,
you are wasting the gift that Frith gave you. (poofle)
(droopears) I'm sorry, I shouldn't lecture to you. I'll drop the
subject if you like.
Callie
Geoffrey Brent
> <ky00tfluff> poor mr art, so cash strapped. i could easily double yor
> offer with my resources for anybun to hunt yew down, but why bother? yew
> arnt worth it, and the path of ky00t is the way of luv.
>
> i luv yew mr black *bunnihugs*
Interesting. Explain to me again why this 'love' takes the
form of deliberately causing my doefriend distress?
> i feel safe in the knowledge that yor reward for me will never be
> claimed.... nature will sheild me from yor technology, and the inle
> cursed bunnytech <stomp>
*shrug* You die, you don't die. I win either way.
[S]
Henbane loped over and peered curiously at the document in
Art's hands.
"Wanderer stationery? Love, why are you buying a... 'high
field' and... oh, it has a 'dead pool' in it? That sounds
very romantic... but what _is_ it?"
"Think of it as a sort of investment."
"What's the rate of return?"
"Oh, about five to four."
[/S]
> <ponderfluff> oh decisions descisions! yew know... i want my first time
> to be special <solemnfluff> (whadda ya expect for a bun that didnt reach
> sexual maturity till after reaching the meadow?)
I'm donating this straightline to charity.
> cuddlebunni - "little wolfskin boots, and clove cigarettes. an erotic
> funeral, for which shes dressed.."
Art Black, Lord Famine
Yes... I guess that song *does* sum up your sex life.
Terrence Deuce O'Connor
in <B9418A29.267%ja...@devilbunnies.org>:
>Any Wanderer collecting the above bounty using only their own equipment
>can collect the entire reward for themselves. Any Wanderer collecting
>the bounty using signed-out Wanderer equipment pays 30% of the reward to
>the motor pool fund, and 10% to pay for the celebrations afterwards.
[s]
"[PiG-13]. Now we gotta run the calculations again."
"No, we don't."
"Sure we do. We lose 40% to the general fund."
"No, we lose 40% for *signed-out* equipment."
"Oh. <pause> They'll kill us afterward, though."
"Nope. Check the budget, page 3. I included 5% for bribery and apology
costs."
"Nice."
"Thank you."
[/s]
Feloni Mayhem
> The Four are pleased to announce that a bounty has been placed on the
> head of the one known as 'cuddlebunni'.
You think putting a roll of paper towels on cuddlebunni's fluffy head will
improve the situation?
> US$200,000 reward.
Don't trust him. I heard he had to mortgage Dunwich labs just to pay
for this month's cashew payroll. He's just trying to inflate his stock value
so he can cash in before his investors go bankrupt (financially, they've
been morally bankrupt for ages).
> at double value. Rare and collectible three-DVD 'Trampoline Playtime'
> collection given away free with any purchase of value $300 or more.
<cringe> You've got some unholy marketing agreement with NoBunny,
haven't you?
> double rewards for live delivery of said Cuddlebunni.
Hmm, hey cuddles, if you can visit Dunwich and get away, Arty will
owe you $400,000. Or $800,000, if you redeem it in merchandise from
his Betty Crocker catalog. Might be fun. (:=
The Colective
sister mayhem wrote:
> You think putting a roll of paper towels on cuddlebunni's fluffy head will
> improve the situation?
<gigglefluff> yew cant kill ky00t!
> > US$200,000 reward.
> Don't trust him. I heard he had to mortgage Dunwich labs just to pay
> for this month's cashew payroll. He's just trying to inflate his stock value
> so he can cash in before his investors go bankrupt (financially, they've
> been morally bankrupt for ages).
<bouncy> given the ammount of time they waste tinkering its a wonder
they can get anything together .... i didnt think mcgregors farm was
*that* productive!
> > double rewards for live delivery of said Cuddlebunni.
> Hmm, hey cuddles, if you can visit Dunwich and get away, Arty will
> owe you $400,000. Or $800,000, if you redeem it in merchandise from
> his Betty Crocker catalog. Might be fun. (:=
<snickerpoofle> it would be tempting just to see the look on their faces
when all their cuton detectors explode! wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
<bouncehopspin>
cuddlebunni - "i luv yew, yew luv me, were as happy as can be!"
The Colective
> ****************return tightcuddlebeam****************
> **************furry fury encryption enguaged**********
> (shrugfluff) What's one more wanted bun in the warren? The Nibble
> Notices on my head come from the likes of FluffyTeacher of
> Denverwarren and CrimsonPaw at DEWComm among others. The others here
> that have death threats all have been issued by 'powerful' buns. The
> warren would be in no more danger with your presence then it already
> is.
<sighfluff> my concern is that...this is not just a single bun looking
for one of us, its the fudds, the four *and* the buns all focused on a
single individual. added to this, there is the mentality of some of
these. the majority henchbuns of most high level buns wouldnt consider
detroying an entire warren to get their quarry... the same could not be
said for the fudds or the four...their motto is "the more the merrier".
> I'm glad you're happy, cuddlebunni, but don't you get lonely out
> there? At least if you came to visit, maybe, (shrugfluff) maybe you'd
> find somebunny who'd be happy to return to that meadow with you.
> You've said it yourself, life is sacred. However, if you don't share
> that life with somebun else and help bring new life into the world,
> you are wasting the gift that Frith gave you. (poofle)
(cuddlebunni launces into a chorus of "match maker match maker make me a
match...")
<gigglefluff>
<sobereartwitch> i dont even know if i can contribute..... i was at an
age when most buns would have turned to dust when i first showed signs
of maturity. there is a lot that isnt known about me, and most of it
lost in the sands of time with the fall of the oz warrens. those few
warrens that have announced themselves are newly established.
cuddlebunni
**************furry fury encryption disenguaged***********
********************tightcuddlebeam off*******************
cuddlebunni - "so understand, dont waste your time always searching for
those wasted years"