Suspended in Twitter

[Maria Rigel]

It looks like my @Maria___White account on X has been suspended. I discovered it yesterday, when I tried to use it. Because I hadn't used it since last February, when I created it, and then only for one post, when I tried to log in I made mistakes and I only thought of checking my email afterwards. I have no idea if it was suspended because of my mistakes in logging in, because it was inactive for so long, or maybe even because the one post was too much for someone. I could go fill in the form asking for it to be unsuspended, but in all honesty, I think that not using X could be for the best. Short messages and anybody being able to see and reply anybody else (or so is the claim, who knows what's actually going on?) seem to me like a pretty good recipe for misunderstanding and disaster.

So, if I don't think X is a good idea, why the hell did I try to post? Well, the usual thing. Provocation. So, maybe instead of tweeting, it's best to have a long rant here, in my own realm (my late husband created this particular Usenet group), going into the full details. It's probably shouting in an empty room, but then, X often looks suspiciously like shouting in an empty room as well, so where's the difference?

First, let me explain the circumstances of that one post and why I felt I had to say something. It's a bit of a long story, and it all began in 2016, when I started getting interested in magic and synchronicities. I looked around for Internet communities that dealt with the topic, and after a bit of floating around, I settled on the Secret Sun blog by Chris Knowles. I was a regular commenter and when Chris wrote a novel saying you could name your own price for the e-book, I bought it for $5.18, because a round figure wouldn't have much secret significance.

I did sometimes post in other sites as well. A friend of mine told me about Jeanne Mayell's site of psychic predictions, and I thought it would be quite a lot of fun and for a while I posted a few things. My predictions weren't based on anything I understood as psychic power, though, but on a mix of my imagination and back-of-the-envelope estimates. At the time I thought it might be a useful place to timestamp any predictions I made, but then I found that Jeanne could be a rather aggressive moderator, and I lost interest. There is still an interesting one I made on New Year's Eve 2018 (I picked the date to attract attention, of course), about the high likelihood of WWIII breaking out in the following two years, with probability decreasing after that. The reasoning was that I thought that we were near peak oil production, and I thought the Global Financial Crisis had been a foreshock of that, which was what my models expected (financial crisis before the true energy crisis):

https://jeannemayell.com/community/international-predictions/world-war-iii/paged/2/#post-9408

Then, when AI Dungeon appeared, I thought it could be a tool to learn about what the hell magic and synchronicities were all about, and I spent the last three months of 2020 playing a fair bit there.

On December 2020 I wasn't sleeping much, but I wasn't worrying about it, because I felt quite buzzy and happy. I reckon the main reason for that was a vitamin/herbal supplement I was taking, but I don't exclude the possibility that there were other contributing factors.

Then, on 4th Jan 2021, it all came together in my head and I had this idea about what a time portal was. And proceeded to type an example in the comments of the Secret Sun blog. It had 8 lines, but I only remember clearly the last two:

"I believe the biggest threat for the world is climate change. And greed. But I repeat myself.

I am Maria White and I am where I'm at."

That comment got a lot of replies, which surprised me. I wasn't expecting it. After that, all hell broke loose. I don't mean the stuff in the Capitol on 6th Jan, I mean in my personal life. I lost my mind. I wasn't sleeping at all. For the next two weeks, I couldn't work.

Among the surreal things that happened during those two weeks, I remember watching Mary Trump on YouTube on an interview, and they asked her how she thought that Donald Trump was feeling. And it got really strange, because I felt that when she was talking about Donald Trump, she was talking about me. You may think that it was because I feeling what Mary Trump was describing, but it wasn't like that at all. She was saying that Donald Trump was getting very desperate. And I was thinking: "Why are you saying I'm desperate? I'm not desperate, I'm angry!" But that was because *I* was a word that was getting very blurry for me. It meant "we" and other things, but I can't remember clearly, I was in a mess. How I got the notion that *I* could also be Donald Trump, I have no idea. I suppose I was in a similar sort of funk that what Marianne Faithfull described when she said that she decided to commit suicide by mistaken identity, thinking that she was Brian Jones. Except that I never thought in terms that I was Donald Trump, I thought that Mary was saying "I" when she said Donald Trump. If that makes any sense.

Then I got better, and I decided that I wasn't taking any more the herbal supplement, I was going to stop participating in the Secret Sun blog, and stop playing in AI Dungeon, because all that thinking about synchronicities had done me no good.

After a month or two of staying away from anything to do with synchronicities, I began to worry that people would say that I was just suffering from some sort of mental health condition, starting all the way back when I started to look into synchronicities. And I couldn't stand the idea. I knew, I absolutely knew, it wasn't just me. I mean, come on, there were a number of people going on about synchronicities in the Internet, and it wasn't just that they didn't look like your average crazy person, it's that they had quite a lot of followers. People don't go around following crazy people, do they? All right, they followed a lot of crazy people that said that the pandemic was nothing to get worried about, but that was because they were told those things by politicians in positions of power and businesses that wanted to make money no matter what. People don't go around following random crazy people with no power. There must be some sort of reason.

But I couldn't explain what was going on, either. So I decided to join the membership of another site, Rune Soup, that also talked about those things. At least I would be able to interact with other members and get some clarity, or so I hoped. That didn't work too well. Things kept getting weirder. I remember especially 6th June (6/6) because I had another bout of sleeplessness and I called the doctors for something to help me sleep. I got given a number that had 666 in it, which made me a bit nervous, but I was determined to get something, so I went ahead and called. The conversation got a little strange, but I ignored everything till it got to the point when I got asked: "Have you tried sleeping downstairs?" That was a clincher. It wasn't just me. Something weird was definitely happening. That isn't a normal question for a doctor.

A few days later, one of the members of Rune Soup asked to be sent a 50p coin by somebody who understood the implications of a magical deal. I offered to send it to see where he would go with it, but he didn't say anything that made too much sense to me, and I never had much intention of sending it, because everybody says that mixing money and magic is very iffy, so I wouldn't do it unless I felt confident it was OK. It never happened, but I exchanged emails with the guy. A couple of months later I left the membership of Rune Soup, because I was pretty sure it wasn't doing me any good.

Then, on February 2022, Russia was about to invade Ukraine, and I kept having vague ideas around paying the ferryman, and I remembered the 50p guy. I wanted to tell him something, but I didn't know what to say. I was about to settle on saying: "How would you know if you were a Jew, and if you were, how would you find Schindler?" But then the invasion happened, and I sent him a rather different email, telling him about the prediction I had made years before in Jeanne Mayell's forum.

A few days later, this bit of news came in Tass, the official Russian news agency. Note the time:

https://tass.com/world/1412847

On February 2023, the train derailment in East Palestine, Ohio, happened. Somebody tweeted "Where are all the climate activists at?" Which looked a lot like somebody who had read my time portal. But that wasn't the only thing. Everybody kept using variations of the words "where it's at" and the like. It was like the entire world was shouting my name. And then, on 18th Feb Don Trump Jr tweeted that his dad was going to visit East Palestine and then came the provocation: 'If our “leaders” are too afraid to actually lead real leaders will step up and fill the void.' Well, I just had to reply to that. I remember that it was hard to even create the account, I didn't know why, but things kept showing up in Balinese and not working. Eventually, I managed to create the account and tweet: 'I don't live in your country, dear. And I'm still a bit peeved about the confusion of identity with your dad.' I knew people were likely to interpret it as something around stealing online identity, and I didn't care. With stakes as high as American politics, I expect that stealing online identities is something that happens with astounding regularity. But I hoped that at least some people would know I could mean something else.

And why did I want to tweet again yesterday? Well, another provocation, though a smaller one.

For the last week or so people have been talking about the Jeffrey Epstein list that is going to come out. And that's reminded me of the notorious piece of modern art consisting on sticking a banana to a wall. I remember reading that a guy went and ate the banana and wrote on the wall "Epstein didn't kill himself." Which was quite a popular thing to say at the time. And I've been thinking that it could be about Marianne Faithfull, which makes sense if you've read her bio: Andy Warhol, Velvet Underground, Venus in Furs, Epstein, Brian Jones, Marianne radioactive, death is the next great adventure. And Marianne Faithfull's birthday wasn't long ago, it's on 29th Dec.

And then, somebody told me about another notorious piece of modern art that's been sold relatively recently, 14th April 2021, for more than a million dollars ($1,355,555 to be precise): a single pixel, neutral grey color, NFT. And I don't really have a problem with consenting adults getting as weird as they like, but I have a bit of a problem with the fact that a lot of modern art seems to be about repeating ad nauseam: "See? Rich people can do whatever the hell they like, then demand to have their boots kissed by ordinary people, and get them kissed." And, you know, it gets more than a bit tiring. Especially since it's mostly true. Basically, it's the kind of provocation that gets at me pretty much every time. So I thought I wanted to reply three things:

1. Dearie, you seem to have money (or ether) to burn and you overpaid, which rich people often do, and should. I paid $5.18 and refused to pay 50p for what was, and I still think is, useful information.
2. Those aren't the divine proportions you are looking for. See here:
https://energywatchers1.wordpress.com/2023/11/03/chapter-8-divine-proportions/
(and yeah, that 8 billion divided by your price works out close to the square of 77 is kinda cute, but not good enough)
3. You can't pay your regular community group with crypto. You could pay Transition Towns with the pounds they printed themselves, but let's be honest, literally printing your own currency only ever worked in failed states like Somalia.