Reward offered
Garry Lanier
Please read the answers to questions people have asked me
I will give you an example of the problem. I took a
6300C scanner from my stock and connected it to my P3 500 and it worked like
a dream.
After much frustration in my office, testing similar machines with the
following results "Sorry scanner cannot be initialized, scanner not found" I
decided to bring one into my house to test it. Same result. But here is the
crazy thing. I plugged the worker, my 6300C, back in and got the same
result, "Sorry scanner cannot be initialized, scanner not found" .
Another example Last week I purchased 200 2200C (not 2000C) scanners and I
tried dozens
on at least 6 or 7 machines and same answer as above. The suddenly one
machine worked fine.saw all the 2000C's and I managed to test 20 then I went
to bed.
ANSWERS TO SOME QUESTIONS FIRED AT ME:
Ok. Folks the OS is all of the following across a variety of machines from
P2 - P3 - P4
Win 98
Win 98 SE
XP
XP Pro
It is USB specific and has occured on the following scanners
2200C
3400C
5300C
5370C
5390C
6300C
6370C
6390C
I have used Mother Board USB controllers
External powered USB Hubs
But not a PCI USB HUB which I try this afternoon.
The problem
"Ben Myers" <ben_...@charter.net> wrote in message
news:3d67a4f8...@news.charter.net...
> Garry,
>
> I wish there was a quick and easy solution. HP scanners (and especially
the
> low-end printers) are legendary for having poorly implemented supporting
> software and drivers. The HP install software messes up the registry, and
when
> the software is uninstalled it does not clean up the registry after
itself. (Of
> course, there are probably 1,000,000 other software packages that do the
same,
> most of them from that paragon of quality and reliable software,
Microsoft.)
> And PrecisionScan's uninstall does not delete all of its files, either.
>
> What release of Windows were you using? Was the HP PrecisionScan software
the
> right release for the release of Windows? Did you try other versions of
> PrecisionScan? I forget which interfaces the 6300C and 2000C use. Is it
SCSI,
> USB, or parallel?
>
> Be a little more specific, and maybe somebody can make a suggestion to get
your
> scanners all working. To do so may require a clean reinstall of Windows,
> however, to fix up the registry garbage. or run a well-regarded registry
> cleanup program, if such an animal exists... Ben Myers
>
> On Sat, 24 Aug 2002 07:37:27 GMT, "Garry Lanier" <garry...@yahoo.com>
wrote:
>
> >Large Reward offered for solution:
> >
> >
> >
> >First I will say that this solution is required quickly and MUST provide
the
> >required solution.
> >
> >
> >
> >First your reward: ANY HP item to the value of $1000- AUD that we have
in
> >stock. These items range from K80's in mint condition, A3 printers,
> >Professional 2200 printers to 6390 scanners with the full house and more.
> >
> >
> >
> >Now your problem.
> >
> >
> >
> >I re-sell HP gear. I will give you an example of the problem. I took a
> >6300C scanner from my stock and connected it to my P3 500 and it worked
like
> >a dream.
> >
> >
> >
> >After much frustration in my office, testing similar machines with the
> >following results "Sorry scanner cannot be initialized, scanner not
found" I
> >decided to bring one into my house to test it. Same result. But here is
the
> >crazy thing. I plugged the worker, my 6300C, back in and got the same
> >result, "Sorry scanner cannot be initialized, scanner not found" .
> >
> >
> >
> >Another example Last week I purchased 200 2000C scanners and I tried
dozens
> >on at least 6 or 7 machines and same answer as above. The suddenly one
> >machine worked fine.saw all the 2000C's and I managed to test 20 then I
went
> >to bed.
> >
> >
> >
> >Next day: "Sorry scanner cannot be initialized, scanner not found"
> >
> >
> >
> >So the best solution or in fact ANY 100% solution gets the above gratis!
> >
> >
> >
> >Regards
> >
> >
> >
> >Garry Lanier
> >
> >
> >
>
> Ben Myers
> Spirit of Performance, Inc.
> 73 Westcott Road
> Harvard, MA 01451
> tel: 978-456-3889
> eFax: 810-963-0412
> PayPal, MC, VISA, AMEX accepted.
robkamel
you using the exact same USB cable for all the testing? You'll never get
anywhere unless you keep all but one component static.
Kadaitcha Man
news:wjX99.6011$MC2....@news-server.bigpond.net.au...
> The Problem again:
>
> Please read the answers to questions people have asked me
> Ok. Folks the OS is all of the following across a variety of machines
from
> P2 - P3 - P4
>
> Win 98
> Win 98 SE
> XP
> XP Pro
>
> It is USB specific and has occured on the following scanners
>
> 2200C
> 3400C
> 5300C
> 5370C
> 5390C
> 6300C
> 6370C
> 6390C
>
> I have used Mother Board USB controllers
> External powered USB Hubs
It looks like you owe Gazwad $A1000...
If it's happening with all that lot, the HW is stuffed. Like he said, give
the units a thump.
--
Kadaitcha Man
Moderator: alt.os.windows-xp
Moderator: alt.support.shyness
Lane Lewis
problem " Call a Professional " If your to cheap to call a pro who's gonna
believe your going to send the reward.
Lane
Kadaitcha Man
news:JwX99.250724$8M1.39...@twister.nyroc.rr.com...
> Far too many variables at work here for any meaningful troubleshooting.
Bullshit. The answer is simple... gazwad got the answer... the hardware
wasn't packaged correctly and was fucked in transit.
It's plainer than the nose on your face... all that equipment failing to
work on any number of combinations of system means only one thing... well,
two... either the hardware is fucked or the OP doesn't know what the fuck
he's doing.
And I bet Gazwad doesn't get paid, either...
<To Gazwad... There's enough here to get a garnishee on his account. Let me
know if you need help... for a small fee...>
Bank: CBA
Account name: Gully Corp Pty Ltd ITF
The Gully Settlement TAS Mynetshack.com
BSB: 063551
Account Number: 10232366
Telephone +61 3 5221-3976
FAX +61 3 5221-3976
Mobile 0410 313 115
Postal address
Geelong West, Vic. Australia 3218
Second Hand Dealers Reg. No 8409 ABN 64 337 196 454
Kadaitcha Man
news:iLX99.599$Hl4...@nwrddc03.gnilink.net...
> Take your bogus award elsewhere. There is a realistic way to solve your
> problem " Call a Professional " If your to cheap to call a pro who's gonna
> believe your going to send the reward.
Hey, you dumbfuck pillock... yes, you. Gazwad is hot on the trail of winning
the reward. If you piss the OP off and Gazwad doesn't get his just deserts
as a result, I will hunt you down all over usenet and make your miserable
existance on usenet more miserable than it is now. Then I'll sue you for
Gazwad's reward.
Lane Lewis
Kadaitcha Man
> Complaint sent to ab...@altopia.com
Well, look, seeing you've done that, send this one as well... you
fuck-witted, mouth-breathing, arm-swinging, knuckle-dragging retarded,
stupid, dumbfuck, jizz guzzling, wanking, pillocking arsehole with warts.
air biscuit n. Fart; botty burp. As in "Has somebody launched an air
biscuit?"
almond n. 1. Penis. From the rhyming slang, almond rock - cock. 2. An
imperial measure of semen; approximately one stomach full.
anal announcement n. Fart; botty burp; trouser trumpet.
Apache n. Sex without a condom. Riding bare back.
apple catchers n. Generously proportioned knickers.
aris n. Convoluted cockney rhyming slang for arse. From Aristotle - bottle -
bottle and "glarse"- arse.
arse-feta n. The cheese (qv) matured in the narrow passage leading to
Cadbury Alley (qv).
arse-grapes n. Descriptive term for haemorrhoids.
arse-piss n. Diarrhoea; rusty water (qv); the shits.
arseholed a. intoxicated; having consumed an excessive amount of alcohol.
art pamphlet n. A jazz mag; one handed reading material.
assets n. Of British tabloid journalism, a girls breasts.
aunt Mary n. Vagina.
axe wound euph. Vagina.
B
B.S. US abbr. Bullshit.
baby bullets euph. See baby gravy.
baby gravy euph. Semen; smegma. Also baby boullion.
bacon bazooka euph. Penis; pork sword; the pink oboe (qv)
bag ladies' period n. Superlative of foul tasting.
baibhe (bye-b) Gaelic n. A rough old slapper; a boot (qv).
bald man in a boat euph. Vagina; hairy pie (qv).
Ballarat Aus. n. A fully erect penis. As in Tow are you gettin' on Bruce?"
"Bleedin' marvellous Sheila. I'm nearly at Ballarat". See also Lake
Wendouree.
ball buster n. Sexually aggressive female; cock chomper.
bang v. To have sex; to shag. e.g. 'We were banging, like a shite house (qv)
door in the wind". n. A sexual encounter; a shag.
banjo n. On the penis, that thin ridge of skin connecting the polo neck to
the bobby's helmet (qv).
bannocks interj. Scotts equivalent of bollocks. n. Jockspeak for knackers;
plums (qv).
baps (baaah-ps) n. N. Ireland Breasts. e.g. "Phoaar! Will yer just look at
the baps on that?'
Barclays rhym. slang A wank; five finger shuftle; hand shandy (qv). Barclays
bank - wank.
barf v. To vomit; puke; bowk.
bargain bucket n. An overemployed and over-stretched fanny.
barking spider n. Ringpiece; anus; chocolate starfish (qv).
barse n. The perineum; that little bit between your balls and your arse.
bash-the-bishop euph. To masturbate; toss; bank with Barclays (qv).
bazookas n. A pair of big tits; whoppers.
bean flicker n. Lesbian.
beard n. A woman married to a gay man in order to conceal his homosexuality.
As in: "Do you reckon that Sophie's a beard then, or what?" See also whiff
of lavender, frock.
bear trappers hat sim. Hairy front bottom. As in "She had a fanny like a
bear trapper's hat". Also Davy Crockett's hat.
bearded clam Aus. attr. Barry Humphries Vagina; fanny.
beat-the-meat euph. To avail oneself of a ham shank, perform the
five-knuckle-shuffle (qv).
beaver cleaver n. Male weapon used in axe wounds.
bed flute n. Musical variation on the pink oboe (qv).
beef bayonet euph. Penis; cock, pork sword; love torpedo.
beef curtains euph. Labia.
beetle bonnet euph. Female pubic mound, esp. shaven. From the popular VW
car.
Belgian biscuit n. A vile and non specific sex act performed by the staff of
a rub-a-tug shop (qv). As in 'How much? Fifty quid, eh? Does that include
Belgian biscuit?"
Belisha beacon n. Flashing orange globe on a black and white pole, named
after the Transport Minister in 1934.
bell end euph. The glans of the penis; purple helmet (qv).
bell-swagged a. To be endowed with a large bell end on a contrastingly small
stem or shaft.
bender n. 1. Drinking spree; Leo Sayer (qv). 2. A queer fella. See gender
bender.
berry n. A sexual deviant; kinky person; one who shags animals.
biffin n. Sweat secreted in the biffin bridge (qv) area during intercourse.
biffin bridge n. See barse.
biffon n. That part of the female anatomy between the bottom and the vagina,
which the man's balls biff on during intercourse.
bikini burger n. See hairy pie.
Billy Mill roundabout n. The climactic point of masturbation. From the A1058
Coast Road in Newcastle. e.g. "MY mum walked in just as I was coming up to
the Billy Mill roundabout". See also vinegar strokes (qv).
Billy Wright Famous Everton footballer, latterly rhyming slang for shite.
bint n. Derogatory term for a silly old slapper; a bird; bit of fluff.
biscuits n. The contents of the stomach after a heavy night`s drinking. As
in "Get me a bucket, quick, I'm gonna chuck me biscuits".
blart n. Female vagina. Also collective n. Women; totty (qv). e.g. 'Golly
gosh! This pub is heaving with blart".
bliff n. Minge; front bottom.
bliff mag n. Pornographic magazine; jazz mag (qv); art pamphlet.
blit n. See blart.
blob n. Condom; rubber; rubber Johnny (qv).
blow mud v. To noisily expel a loose stool; crop spray (qv).
blue-veined custard chucker n. Penis. Also blue veined piccolo, blue veined
Havana.
bobby's helmet n. Bell end. From the distinctive shape of the British police
constable's hat.
boff v. To fuck (qv).
boiler n. An ugly woman one would prefer not to service.
bollocks n. 1. Nonsense; balls, as in: 'That's utter bollocks". 2. Knackers;
balls, as in: 'Them's massive bollocks".
bomb bay n. The arse; the area of one's body towards which the rear gunner
(qv) is attracted.
boner US n. An erection; stifly.
bonk v. To boff (qv).
bonk-on n. Erection, as in: `A copy of Fiesta and a box of tissues please,
Mr Newsagent. I've got a right big bonk on".
Boris n. used by females Vagina.
bosch v. To drill a hole between cubicles in a public lavatory for the
purpose of spying on, or making your cock available to, your neighbour (for
example, the future Bishop of Durham).
bott v. A sex act performed by botters (qv).
botter (bot-ah) n. He who botts.
Bourneville Boulevard euph. Arse; fudge tunnel. Used to denote
homosexuality, as in: 'I believe he strolls down the Bourneville Boulevard".
Bovril bullets n. Stools; excrement.
bowk v. To barf, vomit; boy up; create a pavement pizza (qv).
Bowling from the Pavilion end euph. Botting (qv).
box of assorted-creams Aus. n. A sexually promiscuous female, as in: `Watch
yourself there Bruce, that one's a right Box of Assorted Creams".
box n. 1. Vagina. As in: "Look at that lovely little box". 2. In cricket, a
gentleman's protective device worn around the undercarriage (qv). As in:
"Eeeeargh! I wish I'd worn a box".
breast fest n. The summer months during which women sunbathe topless.
brim n. The skirting around the base of one's helmet (qv).
Bristols ryhm. slang Tits. From Bristol Citys - titties.
brown bullet-hole euph. Bumhole; barking spider (qv).
brown hatter n. One who bowls from the Pavilion end (qv) and in so doing
tarnishes his bobbies helmet (qv).
brown sword n. See banjo.
brown trout n. A shite.
brown pipe engineer n. A plumber who comes in the tradesman's entrance.
brown wings n. The honour bestowed on a man after he has completed a
successful spell of bowling from the Pavilion end (qv).
BSH abbr. British Standard Handful. The unit by which breasts are often
measured.
bucket fanny n. A spacious vagina. Also Tardis fanny / twat.
buffty Scotch n. A gay man.
build a log cabin euph. To pass an enormous, solid stool. As in: 'I wouldn't
go in there mate Someone's just built a log cabin"
bulldog eating porridge euph. The vagina in the aftermath of sex. From
Shakespear's Henry IV. "Lo, I see my ladies' bulldog hath been eating
porridge again".
bullshat v. Past tense of bullshit. As in 'Me liar, he bullshat me.
bum bandit n. A robber, outlaw or highwayman, who steals people's bottoms.
bum chain n. A rather intimate version of the Conga danced by those on the
other bus (qv).
bum cigar n. In after dinner conversation, a stool. "Well, if you'll excuse
me I think I'll nip upstairs and light a bum cigar".
bunk up n. 1. Bonk; shag, As in: 'Darling, you look beautiful tonight. Any
chance of a bunk up?" 2. Assistance climbing, as in: "Shit. I'm so pissed I
can't get onto the bed. Giz a bunk up will ya?"
burp the worm See bash-the-bishop.
bury a quaker euph. To release a payload from the bomb bay (qv).
C
cabbage n. Girls; totty (qv). As in "I'm looking forward to going out this
evening. I hope to get some cabbage".
cable laying euph. To excre solid stools. As opposed to crop spraying (qv).
Cadbury Alley n. See Bourneville Boulevard.
camel's foot n. Of leggings and tight jeans, those folds generate in a
ladies crotch when they an pulled up too tightly. See also Twix lips.
can US n. Bottom.
Captain's Pie n. 1. Hairy pie; haddock pastie (qv). 2. Of ship's catering,
that pie which belongs to the captain.
carnival knowledge n. Latin phrase meaning to have intimidate relations
with. As in: "Have you had carnival knowledge with your wife within the last
two weeks?"
carpenter's dream euph. Sexually promiscuous woman. As in: "Flat as a board,
and easy to screw".
carpet muncher euph. One who eats hairy pie (qv). Nothing to do with pillow
biting.
Casanova's rubber sock n. Condom; blob (qv).
cauliflower euph. Sex. e.g. "I fancy doing a bit of cauliflower'. From 18th
C. slang for vagina.
cavalier n. Uncircumcised penis.
Chalfonts rhym. slang Haemorrhoids. As in: Chalfont St. Giles - piles.
chapel hat pegs simile used describe large, erect nipples. A in: "Phoarr!
She had nipples like chapel hat pegs'. Also pygmies cocks.
Charlies n. 70s Tits; breasts.
charms n. In British tabloid journalism, the breasts.
chebs n. Tits; breasts.
cheese See knob-cheese.
cheese ridge n. The fertile area of the penis where knob cheese (qv) is
cultivated. Also banjo (qv).
cheesey wheelbarrow n. The penis, as it might appear while being pushed by
an uphill gardener (qv).
chichis Mexican n. Tits; breasts.
chocolate chimney sweep euph. He who applies his purple headed womb broom
(qv) to dirtier duties.
chocolate eye n. Bumhole.
chocolate speedway also chocolate whizzway n. Bumhole; poop chute.
chocolate speedway rider n. Botter (qv).
chocolate starfish n. See chocolate eye, speedway, etc.
choke the chicken euph. See bash the bishop; burp the worm.
choozies Aus. n. Tits; breasts.
chopper n. Penis. As in: 'That Andy Cole couldn't score in a brothel with a
£50 note wrapped round his chopper'.
chubblies n. A fat woman's choozies (qv).
chuck your muck euph. To drain one's spuds; ejaculate.
chuckles n. Balls.
chuff 1. v. To pass wind; shoot a bunny rabbit. e.g. "Oops! Best open a
window vicar. I believe I've just chuffed". 2. n. Vagina; ladies front
bottom.
chuff mountain EEC n. Surplus of woman guests at a party.
chuffle plug n. Tampon.
chunder v. To produce a pavement pizza (qv); barf (qv).
chutney farmer euph. A manwho rears chocolate starfish (qv); botter (qv).
Also chutney ferret.
chutney locker n. Rectum.
cirelejerk n. A shared round of hand shandies (qv).
clagnuts n. Dangleberries (qv). Also tagnuts.
clam jousting n. A sexual encounter between lesbians. Also Velcro fastening.
clam smacker n. A lesbian.
clarts n. Tacky excrement, such as would cling to the lavatory bowl above
the water level rather than slip into the water.
clear the custard euph. To have a long overdue wank. e.g. "Ooooooh I've got
balls like boulders. I'd better nip upstairs and clear the custard'.
clinkers Aus. n. Difficult to remove poo particles; winnits; kling-ons.
cludgie n. Shithouse (qv); lavatory; thunderbox.
clusterfuck n. A regrettable situation of immense idiocy.
coco sombrero n. Mexican variation of brown hat.
combustofiatulation n. The highly dangerous act of flame throwing with one's
trouser trumpet.
conkers See hairy conkers.
Constable n. A roughly shaven minge.
copper bolt v. A solid stool.
corybungo n. Arse; backside.
costume drama n. The frantic behaviour of a woman who cannot decide what to
wear for a party. See also period drama.
cottage v. To go house hunting on Bourneville Boulevard (qv), looking for
something a bit more solid than a log cabin (qv).
council gritter rhyming slang Arsehole; dirtbox, Council gritter - shitter.
As in: "Watch that one. I hear he takes it up the council gritter'. Also
Gary Glitter.
crab ladder n. Penis.
cranberry dip n. A special recipe for hairy pie (qv) available only during
rag week (qv).
crapper n. Lavatory. From the German inventor of the self-cleaning water
closet, Thomas Shitehousen.
cream v. To ejaculate.
crouton n. An erection; bone.
crop spraying euph. To have diarrhoea. As opposed to cable laying (qv). For
example, a doctor may enquire: "So; how's your old Gary Glitter? Have you
been cable laying or crop spraying"
cumulo nimbus n. The posh Latin term for oral sex; the stimulation of the
clematis.
cunt bubble 1. n. An air lock up the fanny, often leading to a minge burp.
2. interj. Something Paul Whicker says when punching the bishop (as opposed
to bashing the bishop).
cupcake n. A small quantity of fart-gas caught in the palm of the hands and
then deposited in a person's face.
curd n. Jizz, or gism (qv).
curl one off v. To carefully deliver a stool. - curler n. A lump of
excrement so delivered, Also crimp off a length naval slang.
cut the cheese euph. To fart.
D
dags Aus. n. Dangleberries (qv).
dangleberries n. Winnits; excrement adhering to the hairs around a badly
wiped bottom.
dick wheat US n. Male pubic hair. Also dick weed.
diddles See diddy ride.
diddy ride See tit wank.
diesel dyke US n. Butch lesbian; stone (qv); fanny nosher.
dinner masher n. A diner who arrives on the other bus (qv).
dirtbox n. Rectum.
dishonourable discharge n. The shameful result of bashing the bishop (qv).
dobber n. A semi-erect penis.
dog n. Hound; boiler; tug boat; sea monster.
dog's bollocks euph. Bees knees; donkey's knob.
dog's egg n. A dog turd, often 'laid' on the pavement.
dog's match n. Any sexual encounter in public place, in bushes, doorways,
under lamp posts etc.
doggies n. Intercourse in the position adopted by dogs, usually near some
dustbins.
dollymop n. An amateur or inexperienced prostitute.
donkey rigged adj. Possessing a large penis.
double bassing v. To have sex from behind fiddling with the lady's left
nipple with your left hand and her fanny with your right - a position
similar to the one adopted when playing the double bass, although the sound
is completely different.
draw mud from the well See follow through.
drink hom both taps euph. To be bisexual; a switch hitter (qv); AC/DC.
drop a pebble euph. To erroneously emit a small body of faeces whilst
attempting to break wind. Also follow through.
drop out n. When a testicle protrudes from the bottom of your underpants, or
in Peter Beardsley's case, football shorts. As opposed to flop out (qv).
drop the kids off at the pool euph. To have a shit.
drown some kittens euph. To pass a litter of small stools which nobody wants
to give a home to.
dry bob n. Sex without male ejaculation.
dugs n. Breasts; baps; paps.
dunny Aus. n. Toilet. Also a popular knickname for someone called Dunn.
dump v. To drop a log; release the poop payload.
dunkie n. Contraceptive sheath.
dust the duvet v. To bash the bishop, especially at bedtime.
Dutch oven n. The area beneath the bedclothes after ones partner has just
played the dawn chorus on his botty bugle.
DVDA n. Double Vaginal, Double Anal. The holy grail of pornographic video
acts, presumably involving Indian Rubber-men and one uncomfortable woman.
E
Eartha Kitts rhym. slang Shits; diarrhoea. Also the Brad Pitts.
Eccles snake n. A penis with warts.
Emmas rhyhming slang Haemorroids. After the brainy media sex pot Emma Freud,
daughter of sour faced dog food chef Clement. Also Nobbies (qv).
empty the anaconda euph. To have a piss.
F
face painting v. A To adorn ones spouse with Jelly Jewellery
fadge n. A cross between a fanny and a vagina.
fairy hammock n. Panties.
family jewels euph. The knackers; male genitalia.
fanny batter n. Crusty residue found on a hairy pie (qv).
fanny flange n. Clitoris.
fanny magnet n. A flash car towards the driver of which totty (qv) is
attracted.
fanny rat n. 1. Penis. 2. Sexually promiscuous male.
farmers rhym. slang Piles. From Farmer Giles.
farting strings n. An imagined part of the body which can be damaged by over
exertion through laughter. e.g. 'Hey! Stop it will ya, before I bust me
farting strings'.
feeding the ducks euph. Wanking. From the apparent similarity in hand
movements.
felch v. To lick lemon curd out of a tea towel holder (qv).
finsbury bridge See barse.
firey surprise n. To receive a brand spanking new electric fire that you
never knew about.
firing blanks v. Post snip ejaculation. e.g. 'You can put the ribticklers
away love, I'm firing blanks'.
fish mitten n. Haddock pastie; lab kebab; vertical bacon sandwich (qv).
fish supper euph. chauvinistic Carnival knowledge (qv) to which, by rights,
a husband is entitled at the end of the day. See also get up them stairs.
fist magnet n. Someone who deserves a punch in the face.
fitbin interj. A brand new and extremely rude swearword invented by Sweary
Mary for the purpose of annoying WHSmiths.
five knuckle shuffle euph. A one-handed work out to a Cindy Crawford
exercise video.
fizzing at the bung hole euph. To denote sexual arousal in women.
fleshy fugelhorn n. Another musical variation on the bed flute; pink oboe
(qv).
float an air biscuit euph. To release a fart.
floater n. 1. Scotch A turd in the pan which will not flush away. 2. Member
of the crap 70s soul band, e.g. Larry.
flop out n. When the flacid penis protrudes through the bottom of your
underpants, often whilst moving from a sitting to standing position.
florins ryhming slang Shits. From the former florin coin, known as 'two bob
bits'.
fluffer n. A female employed on the set of porno movies to stimulate male
actors between takes.
fnarr fnarr! interj. A surpressed and childish exclamation of amusement at
the utterence of a double entre.
follow through v. To accidentally soil ones underpants whilst attempting to
fart; to obtain russet gusset: drop a pebble (qv).
French wank n. In sophisticated society, a tit wank; sausage sandwich (qv).
fried eggs n. Small breasts. As in: "Do you fancy that Kate MosO "Naaaah!
Tits like fried eggs".
frock v. Of lavender marriages, a cosmetic husband. The lesbian's equivalent
of a beard (qv).
front bottom See fur burger.
fuckwit n. Simpleton; one of little intelligence; bollock brain.
fun bags n. Breasts; knockers; thruppennies (qv).
fur burger See front bottom.
furry bicycle stand See fish mitten.
G
gammon flaps See beef curtains. Also gammon goal-posts.
Gary Glitter rhym. slang Arse. From Gary Glitter - shitter. See also council
gritter.
gash n. Vagina. Conveniently rhymes with "Hoy, giz a flash of your..."
gazoo n. Arse; bum.
gazungas n. Large breasts.
gender bender n. Effeminate, flowery male of varying or obscure sexual
orientation e.g. Marc Almond out of Soft Cell.
get off at Edge Hill euph. Coitus interruptus; withdrawal before
ejaculation. (Edge Hill is the last station before Liverpool Lime Street.)
Aus. get off at Redfern. Scot. Paisley. Lond. Clapham. Newcastle Gateshead
etc.
get up them stairs The cry from a chauvinist male to his wife which
indicates that he has finished eating, drinking and watching football on
telly, and now wishes to retire, to the bedroom to make an ungainly and
flatulent attempt at sexual intercourse.
get wood v. To achieve an erection. As in: "Sorry love, I'm having trouble
getting wood". Also get string.
ghost shit n. A stool or dump of which there is no trace when you stand up
and turn round to admire it.
gick Eire n. Shit.
ginger beer rhym. slang Queer.
gobble interj. A noise made by turkeys.
go all the way to Cockfostersv. To have sexual intercourse. As in "I thought
i'd have to go home via the Billy Mill Roundabout, but she took me all the
way to Cockfosters."
gobshite n. Someone prone to uttering verbal inaccuracies; bullshitter.
golden shower euph. A vile sex act; unfortunate mix-up in a crowded German
bathroom.
goolies n. The colloquialism for testicles least likely to offend a vicar or
grandparent.
gorblimey n. A type of trousers popular among council tenants in the 1950s.
Greek sauna See Dutch oven.
grin like a wanking Jap sim. To grin broadly, as a Nissan executive might do
as he turned (even more) Japanese (qv) as he neared the vinegar strokes (qv)
on his approach to the Billy Mill roundabout (qv).
grogan n. 1. A log; turd. 2. A cute wee Scotch lassie with a twee voice.
grow a tail v. To defecate; build a log cabin (qv).
grub See biffin.
grundle US n. Barse (qv).
grunts n. The type of undesirable bints (qv) who appear in reader's wives
pages.
guard's van n. Of pulling a train (qv), the least desirable position in the
queue. As in: "Bagsy I'm not in the guard's van fellas".
guff v. To fart; let off.
guff cloud n. The noxious vapour produced by guffing.
gusset typist euph. A woman who masturbates.
gusset nuzzler euph. Lesbian.
H
haddock pastie See hairy cheque book.
hairy cheque book See hairy cup.
hairy cup See hairy doughnut.
hairy doughnut See hairy goblet.
hairy goblet Seehairy lasso.
hairy lasso See hairy pie.
hairy pie n. A kipper; Velcro triangle (qv).
hairy toffee n. Dangleberries (qv); Kling-ons (qv).
half leapfrog v. To have sex in the doggies (qv) position.
ham howitzer n. A military weapon descended from the pork sword (qv).
hamburger shot n. A rear view in a pornographic magazine in which the beef
curtains (qv) are visible.
ham shank rhyming slang for a Barclays (qv).
Hampton rhyming slang Penis. Hampton Wick - dick. Also to get your Hampton
Court - an accident involving a zip.
hand shandy n. See ham shank.
hand solo n. A solitary hand shandy (qv).
hand to gland combat n. A one man, three minute bout of gladitorial combat
involving a Spam Javelin.
hanging salad euph. Wedding tackle (qv).
happy lamp n. Sixth gear stick. As in: "I'm homy. Think I'll give my happy
lamp a quick buff.
happy sack euph. Scrotum; scrots; nads.
hard on n. Wood; a bone.
head lamps n. Bristols (qv). As in: "Phewf! I wouldn't mind giving her head
lamps a rub".
heave a Havana polite euph. Take a dump See also bum cigar.
hee 1. Thai n. Minge; hairy cheque book. 2. interj. One of several noises
made by laughing gnomes.
helmet See bobby's helmet.
Herbie's bonnet See Beetle bonnet.
Hershey highway US euph. See Cadbury Alley et all.
hide the salami euph. A game for two players, one sausage and a hairy pie
(qv).
ho' abbr. Whore. A familiar name given to their charges by pimps in floppy
hats, fur coats and pink Cadillacs. As in: "Yo! Ho', shake that ass".
hog's eye n. See Jap's eye.
honey alter n. See honey pot.
honey pot See hairy cheque book.
hoop stretcher n. In kitchens, one who hides the salami (qv) in the tea
towel holder (qv).
horatio n. Posh Latin term used by doctors for oral sex on a man.
horse eating oats sim. As in "She hasn't been shagged for ages. If you put
your hand down her pants it would be like a horse eating oats."
hosebag n. A woman of loose morals. She of bucket fanny (qv).
horizontal jogging euph. Sexual intercourse.
hot dog n. An egg delicacy -something of an acquired taste -famously enjoyed
by the gay cult actor Divine. v. To eat said morsel, freshly laid.
Howard's Way rhyming slang Homosexual. From the shit BBC TV drama Howard's
Way - gay.
how's your father n. Sex. Usually prefixed with ahem. As in 'Fancy a quick
bit of.. ahem... how's your father?"
hump v. 1. To shag; have sex with. 2. To carry heavy amplification equipment
to and from a live music venue.
hungry arse n. The condition afflicting women in tight jeans whereby a
crease in their pants appears to disappear up the crack of their arse.
I
I.B.M. abbr. Itty bitty meat. A small penis.
Iggy Pop shot n. To "whack off over a TV's ass because it would be a pity to
waste it".
Irish shave n. A dump.
Irish toothache n. An erection; bone. As in: "Is that a gun in your pocket,
or have you just got Irish toothache?"
I say! Interj. Expression of joy upon seeing an attractive woman. Attr.
Terry Thomas.
I.R.S. abbr. Itchy Ring Syndrome. Irritating anal affliction caused by
insufficient wiping of the chocolate starfish (qv), or inflammation of the
farmers (qv).
J
jack off v. To choke the chicken (qv); jerkin' the gherkin.
jacked up adj. To be celibate whilst suffering from a venereal disease.
jam rag n. Tampon.
Japanese flag n. The appearance of the arsehole the morning after a vindaloo
curry. As in: "Christ almighty! I think I'm sitting on a Japanese flag".
Jap's eye n. Male urethral opening; hogs eye (qv).
J. Arthur rhym. slang Masturbation. From J. Arthur Rank -wank. For example,
while watching blue movies Jonathan Ross might say: "Phwwoar! What I weally
want wight now is a quick J. Arthur".
jazz mag n. A printed volume of pornographic material; a journal of
gentleman's interest.
jelly water mangoes euph. Large knockers; gazungas.
Jemima suit n. A tight fitting costume worn by fetishists with strategically
positioned openings over the erogenous zones.
Jenny US n. Fadge; minge.
Jimmy Riddle rhyming slang Vicar friendly term for a piddle.
jism n. Semen. Also gism.
jittler n. Helmet cheese.
jizz abbr. Jism v. To ejaculate.
jizzbags n. The scrotum; John Wayne's hairy saddlebags.
job n. A Richard (qv).
jobby Scotch variation Job.
jobby jouster n. A lunchbox lancer who jousts with another man's jobs.
Jodrell rhym. slang J. Arthur (qv). From Jodrell Bank, the Knuts... fnarr
fnarr! (qv) ... ford space research laboratory.
Johnny See rubber Johnny.
John Thomas n. The pet name by which Lady Chatterley's lover (on the level
gardener Mellor) famously referred to his pink hoe, in the famous saucy
book.
joombye (joom-bee) Scotch n. jism.
jubblies n. Breasts; pink pouffes.
jugs euph. Bosoms. As in: 'Pardon me madam, I was just admiring your lovely
pair of jugs"
K
kahoonas (ka-hooo-naaaz) n. Large wobbly breasts; golden bodangers ;
kermungers.
kak n. (ka-k) Shit. From the Afrikaans - keek.
kakpipe cosmonaut n. One who prefers to dock with the rear unloading bay.
kangaroo shagging a space hopper sim. Sexually energetic; promiscuous. As in
"Phoarr! She goes like a kangaroo shagging a space hopper".
keech n. Crap; kak.
keister n. kak hole; arse.
khaki buttonhole See chocolate starfish.
Khyber posh rhym. slang Anus. From Khyber Pass (par-ss) - arse.
kipper n. Minge; Captain's pie.
kipper for breakfast euph. To rise early and go for a horizontal jog (qv).
Kit-Kat shuffler euph. Masturbateress; gusset typist.
kitten hammock n. Bra.
kittens noses n. Nipples.
kling-ons n. 1. Winnits; dangleberries; anal hangers-on. 2. One of many Star
Trek aliens with bumpy foreheads.
klutz n. Idiot. From the German for block of wood.
knackers n. (na-kaz) childish Testicles. As in: "Ooyaah! I've knacked me
knackers!"
knee trembler n. Intercourse while both parties are standing up. Often in a
shop doorway.
knob cheese n. 1. Smegma. 2. Foreskin feta found underneath Kojak's
roll-neck (qv) and around the banjo (qv) or cheese ridge. Also knob stilton,
knob yoghurt.
Kojak's roll-neck n. Foreskin. Based on the bell end headed seventies TV
detective.
kosher dill n. Circumcised salami; Kojak minus the collar.
L
lab kebab abbr. Labia kebab; fish mitten (qv); vertical bacon sandwich etc.
labia lard See fanny batter.
Lake Wendouree Aus. euph. Ejaculation, e,g. "Oh my God... Uuughh! I'm in
Lake Wendouree!" From the lake at Ballarat (qv) Australia.
langball n. A type of dangleberry (qv) which attaches itself to John Wayne's
hairy saddlebags (qv).
langer n. Penis; whanger (qv).
lamb cannon euph. An arms development dating somewhere between the pork
sword (qv) and the bacon bazooka (qv).
lapper n. A musician who plays the pink oboe (qv) a hairy pie eater (qv).
lavender See whiff of lavender.
lay a cable euph. Build a log cabin (qv). See also cable laying.
lead the llama to the lift shaft euph. Sexual intercourse.
Leo Sayer rhym. slang All dayer. Bender; prolonged drinking spree; all day
party.
lepidopterist n. Person who collects butterflies e.g. Val Doonican.
lettuce n. Female genitalia.
lickalotopus n. Latin name for a tuppence licker (qv) of pre-historic
reptilian proportions.
lid n. Bit above the brim (qv).
lils n. Tits.
liquid laughter n. Puke.
log cabin See build a log cabin.
loon pipe n. Anus.
loose at the hilt adj. To have diarrhoea; crop spray (qv).
lose your mess euph. Ejaculate; to shoot ones load (qv).
lotties n. Breasts.
love puff euph. Gentle, lady-like fanny burp.
love spuds euph. A root vegetable found in the shreddies (qv); knackers.
love torpedo n. boastful Penis. As in: "I sank her bacon battleship with my
love torpedo". Also lovetruncheon.
lucky Pierre n. In botting (qv), the busiest botter in a three man bum chain
(qv); the filling in a shirt lifter sandwich.
lunch box n. In British tabloid journalism, that bulge which appears in
athlete Linford Christie's shorts; a penis.
lunchbox lancer n. archaic Medieval term for a coco shunter (qv). First used
by King Arthur to describe the French army. He wrote: "Fear not the French,
for their knights are without heart, and their King without wisdom. But keep
thine backs as to the wall, for amongst their number thou shalt find more
than a few lunchbox lancers, I can tell you".
lychees n. A more exotic alternative to plums (qv)
M
mackerel n. Pimp. (Unusually, a fish word not referring to the vagina).
Madam Palm and her five sisters euph. Wanking. As in: "I'm just off to bed
with Madam Palm and her five sisters".
mammary dandruff n. Morning-after residue left by a pearl necklace (qv).
manfat n. Semen. Also man's Milk
mapatasi (ma-pa-ta-zee) euph. Aus. Minge. As in: "Show us yer mapatasi,
Sheila". abbr. Map of Tasmania. From the similarity in shape of said island
to a muff.
map of Africa n. The unfortunate stain left on the bed sheet and often the
mattress below after a sexual exchange of bodily fluids.
marge n. A loose woman. From margarine -`spreads easily'.
margold n. The ability to do 5 pop shots (qv) in two hours. To do a margold.
After the US porn actor Bill Margold.
Marmite motorway n. Anus; arsehole; back passage.
Marmite driller euph. See brownpipe engineer.
meat and two veg. euph. Penis and testicles; wedding tackle.
meat market euph. Bar or club heaving with totty (qv).
meat seeking pissile euph. Penis; love torpedo.
milkman euph. affectionate Penis; pork sword.
mince medallions n. See dangleberries.
mess n. Semen; gunk; cock hockle. See also lose your mess.
ming Scotch v. To emit a foul smell. As in: "Christ, it's minging in here!"
minging n. Awful. As in: "Peter Beardsley's haircut was minging".
minge (minj) n. Fanny; quim.
minge winker euph. Strip tease artist.
minnie moo n. Minge.
mohair knickers euph. A large minnie moo.
monkey n. Vagina. As in: "Does the monkey want a banana?"
Montezuma's revenge n. Diarrhoea; Tijuana cha-cha (qv).
moss cottage n. John Thomas's ideal home; minge.
mott n. Minge; mapatasi.
muck n. Mess (qv). As in "Shoot your muck"
muck spreader n. Arse; bum.
mud n. Excrement.
muddy funster n. Botter (qv).
mudeye n. Arse; ringpiece; your old fashioned plastic tea towel holder.
muff 1. n. Minge; fanny. 2. v. To shag; have intercourse with. 3. v. To miss
an easy goal scoring opportunity, e.g. "Andy Cole has muffed it."
muff diver n. A footballer who misses easy goal scoring opportunities, then
falls over in an attempt to win a penalty kick.
muff nudge n. The light brushing of your favourite female hairdresser's
waist against your elbows while she leans forward to cut your hair.
mullet n. That strange haircut favoured by country and western singers and
eighties footballers.
mumblers n. Tight women's bicycle shorts through which you can 'see the lips
moving` but can't understand a word. See also Twix lips, camel's foot,
hungry arse.
mung n. A particularly runny type of arse feta (qv).
mustang n. Of shitty arses, that stubborn dangleberry (qv) which cannot he
shaken off.
mutton musket euph. A smaller more portable field weapon than the lamb
cannon. Also mutton bayonet, mutton dagger.
mutt's nuts adj. (Superlative of good) Variation of dog's bollocks.
N
nads n. Testicles; plums. abbr. gonads.
nadbag n. Nutsack; scrotum.
navigator of the windward pass euph. Rear admiral (qv).
Niffkin's bridge n. Female equivalent of the Biffin bridge or barse (qv).
Nobbies rhym. slang. Piles; Emmas; bum grapes. From Nobby Stiles, combative,
bald, false teethed 1966 World Cup winning English footballer.
norks n. Knockers.
norton n. Bearded clam; Beetle bonnet (qv).
O
olivia v. To have sex with several filthy tramps on a piss stained mattress,
all at once.
oil the truncheon euph. To polish the bobbies helmet; collect one's own
kindling; wank.
onanism (oh-nun-ism) n. 1. Incomplete sexual intercourse. 2. A posh word
what the Queen might use for wanking and that.
on the other bus euph. Homosexual; bowling from the Pavilion end (qv).
one eyed trouser snake euph. Penis; John Thomas; pink oboe. Also one eyed
zipper fish, one eyed pant python.
one off the wrist euph. Five knuckle shuffle; hand shandy.
open your lunchbox euph. To float an air biscuit (qv) resembling yesterday's
egg sandwiches.
owner operator euph. Wank er; one who plays with his own pork sword.
P
painting the ceiling euph. Wanking; the one handed snake charming of the
pant python.
pan handle UK euph. Erect penis; wood; a bonk on.
pant moustache n. The effect achieved when the mapatasi (qv) extends
symmetrically beyond either side of the shreddies (qv). See also spiders
legs.
pants 1. interj. Exclamation of dismay. 2. n. Rubbish; nonsense; arse. As
in: "You're talking pants!".
paps n. Olde Worlde Tits.
park the fudge v. To shit; pass a stool; crimp off a length.
particulars n. Of low budget British sex comedies involving police officers,
a ladies underwear; knickers. As in: "H-excuse me medem, but I may need to
take down your particulars". (Fnarr fharr! (qv))
passion flaps n. A more romantic term for an axe wound (qv).
passion pit n. Bed. See also Dutch oven.
Pat Cash rhym. slang. Slash; piss; siphon the python. From the Australian
tennis player.
pavement pizza n. The contents of ones stomach as they appear after barfing
(qv) in the street.
pearl necklace n. The sticky consequences of reaching the Billy Mill
roundabout (qv) whilst having a sausage sandwich (qv). As in: "I gave her a
beautiful pearl necklace".
pebble dash v. To crop spray (qv) the toilet bowl with clarts (qv).
peeling the carrot euph. Spanking the monkey.
Percy 1. UK n. Penis. As in: "Im just off to point Percy at the porcelain".
2. A small green 0-4-0 saddle tank steam locomotive.
period drama n. To describe the moody and eratic behaviour of women at times
of PMT.
pie See hairy, fish, Captain's.
pills n. Pods; knackers (qv).
pilot of the chocolate runway See navigator of the Windward passage.
pinch a loaf See curl one off.
pineapple rhym. slang. Sperm; semen. From pineapple chunk - spunk.
pink Darth Vadar euph. Cock. From the Star Wars character with a bell end
(qv) for a helmet.
pink oboe euph. Penis. As in: "Tell me madam, do you play the pink oboe?"
pink steel n. Material used as an alternative to wood (qv).
pink velvet sausage wallet euph. Vagina.
pipe smoker 1. US n. Botter (qv). 2. A person who smokes a pipe.
pirate of men's pants euph. Swashbuckling term for your jolly Rogerer; cock;
penis.
piss flaps 1. n. Labia; beef curtains. 2. interj. Exclamation of
disappointment. As in "Oh piss flaps! I never win the Lottery!"
piss rusty water Roger Mellie euph. To gargle and spit arse piss (qv); to
crop spray.
pitch a tent v. To get wood (qv) beneath the bed linen, or conspicuously in
ones trousers.
playing the bone-a-phone euph. Wanking; partaking of a hand shandy.
play the pink oboe v. To perform oral sex on a man. Usually homophobic. As
in: "I didn't know Michael Barrymore played the pink oboe".
plinthe n. A large and somewhat redundant penis.
plonker n. An actor who relies entirely on one crap put-down line and a
three wheeler car to maintain an entire situation comedy for years and years
and fucking years.
plums n. Knackers; balls; testicles. Together with melons and large pairs,
the source of much mirth in British fruit shops.
plumber's toolhag euph. The furry bicycle stand (qv); mott.
Plymouth Argyles rhym. slang Piles. From the famous Plymouth football club.
poblycwm Welsh n. People who like quim (qv).
pocket frog n. A fart; botty burp; anal announcement.
pocket rocket See porridge gun.
poe S. Africa n. Vagina.
poe slap n. Sanitary towel.
pogue mahone Gaelic Kiss my arse, to be sure.
poke v. male To shag; screw; have sex with.
polish the lighthouse v. male To masturbate in the bath.
poo packer See Marmite driller.
poo pipe pirate See kakpipe cosmonaut.
poop chute n. Bumhole; arse.
pop shot n. A scene in a pornographic movie in which a male actor is
required to splash his population paste (qv) on camera, after being suitably
prepared by the fluffer (qv).
population paste n. Semen; baby bullets (qv).
pork sword n. Penis; bacon bazooka; lamb cannon etc.
porridge gun n. A tool used to distribute population paste (qv).
portion n. A good seeing to; a shag. As in: "I'd give her a portion, and no
mistake".
pouch n. An aging, saggy mott (qv) that hangs like a sporran.
pugwash Aus. n. Blow job.
pull a train euph. To take turns at stirring the porridge (qv); for a group
of men to all have sex with the same lady friend.
puma abbr. Pants Up My Arse. See hungry arse.
puppies n. affectionate Breasts.
purple headed womb broom euph. Penis. purple helmet n. Pink Darth Vader's
headgear; bobbies helmet; bell end; glans.
Q
quack n. A short, sharp botty burp often followed by an apologetic "Oops!".
quaker n. Stool. As in: "Where is your lovely wife?" "Why, she has gone
upstairs to bury a quaker".
quaz n. Wanker; bell end ringer (qv). abbr. Quasimodo.
queef US n. Vaginal fart; front botty burp.
quim n. A refined word for the mapatasi (qv) such as a gentleman might use
at a hay clarse cocktail party. From the Welsh Cwm - meaning valley of
pubes.
quimle v. To eat hairy pie (qv). I was quimling her, he quimled me, etc.
R
rag week n. 1. A charity event during which students raise money for good
causes. 2. The time of the month when the no bathing flags fly.
raisin bag n. Nut sack (qv); John Wayne's hairy saddlebags.
rake the cage out euph. To build a log cabin; give birth to a Richard (qv).
ram shackled euph. To be engaged in the act of botting (qv).
reach around n. In botting, pouring your partner a hand shandy (qv) whilst
ram shackled.
rear admiral n. A sailor who prefers to navigate the Windward passage (qv).
rear gunner n. In aviation terms, a gunner who shoots one of his own
aircraft by firing his lamb cannon (qv) into the bomb bay (qv).
rectal retort n. Fart.
red wings n. The honour bestowed upon someone who consumes a haddock pastie
(qv) during rag week (qv).
rib cushions euph. Breasts.
Richard n. rhym. slang. Turd. From Richard the Third. e.g. "I've just given
birth to a ten pound Richard".
ride the great white knuckler euph. To play rhythm on ones own pink oboe.
ride the porcelain bus euph. An involved visit to the lavatory. For example,
one which encompasses pebble dashing (qv).
ride the waves euph. Shagging a generously proportioned lady friend. As in
'Slap the fat - ride the waves".
ring n. Jacksie; anus; brown eye; chocolate starfish.
ring master n. 1. The master of ceremonies at a circus. 2. A botter (qv).
ring sting n. Inflammation of the ring (qv) as a result of pissing rusty
water (qv) such as after visiting the Rupali restaurant in Newcastle and
sampling the world's hottest curry.
Roger Ramjet n. Botter.
Ronson rhym. slang Arse. From Ronson lighter - shiter.
root Aus v. To shag.
rope the pony euph. To wank.
rotoplooker (ro-to-ploo-ka) US n. Penis; chopper; whanger.
roundhead n. A pink Darth Vadar (qv) after the surgical removal of his
Kojak's roll-neck (qv); a yiddled whanger.
round up the tadpoles euph. To wank; bash the bishop.
rub-a-tug shop n. Down market brothel; house of ill repute.
rubber Johnny n. A blob; contraceptive. Also rubber.
rug munchers n. See fanny noshers.
rump gully n. Viewed from Biffin bridge (qv), the gradually sloping valley
beyond kak canyon.
rumpy pumpy n. A polite term for sexual intercourse used by professional
people, vicars etc.
russet gusset n. Skidmarks (qv) or dangleberry (qv) smudging of the
shreddies (qv).
rusty sheriffs badge euph. Ride along Biffin bridge (qv) from John Wayne's
hairy saddlebags (qv) and there it is, right in the middle of kak canyon.
Just before rump gulley.
rusty water See piss rusty water.
S
saddle bags n. 1. Labia; piss flaps. 2. Scrotum. As in John Wayne's hairy
saddlebags.
salami slapper n. One who tolls upon their own bell end (qv); a wanker.
salmon canyon n. The area beyond the beef curtains (qv); that boat crewed by
the bald man (qv); fanny.
sausage jockey n. Anyone who sits on a sausage and bounces up and down.
homophobic Botter.
sausage sandwich n. A juicy salami slipped between two pink baps, the end
result of which is a pearl necklace (qv).
SBD abbr. Silent but deadly. A subtle release of pungent botty gas. Also
silent but violent.
scumbag n. The ultimate term of abuse known to Garry Bushell and other
tabloid journalists.
sea monster See swamp donkey.
serpent socket euph. That hole with which the one eyed trouser snake (qv)
connects.
shaft 1. v. To shag; screw. 2. The penis. 3. The black private dick that's a
sex machine to all the chicks.
shag v. To have sex; to fuck. n. A sexual encounter; a screw.
shagability n. A measurement of how shaggable a person is.
shaggable n. One who has a high degree of shagability.
shagged out n. Exhausted; jiggered; buggered; fucked.
shake the lettuce euph. fem. Girly expression for having a piss.
shaking hands with the unemployed euph. A wrestling bout between Hand Solo
and the pink Darth Vadar; wanking.
shampoo the rug euph. To lose one's population paste (qv) on a mapatasi
(qv). Often when getting off at Edge Hill (qv).
shave a horse euph. To have a piss; take a leak.
shed n. A large, promiscuous woman; slag. Somewhere to stick your tools.
Sherman rhym. slang. Masturbate. Sherman tank - wank.
shirt lifter See uphill gardener.
shit a brick 1. interj. Exclamation of surprise. 2. euph. To be scared. See
shit your pants.
shiter (shy-tuh) n. Arse; kak cannon. That which shites.
shite house (shyt-howss) n. Outside lavatory.
shit faced n. Arseholed; intoxicated; drunk to excess. As in: 'I saw that
Rory McGrath the other night. He was shit faced".
shit locker n. Arse; bomb bay.
shit stabber n. Pork swordsman.
shitter n. 1. Anus; kakpipe. 2. Lavatory.
shit your pants v. To be scared; drop a brick; cake ones keeks.
shoot bunnies posh euph. To fart; pass wind; blow off.
shoot in your boot euph. To be excited. Of Jimi Hendrix, Little Richard
said: "Jimi made my big toe shoot right up in my boot".
shoot your load v. To ejaculate; lose your mess; discharge the porridge gun
(qv).
shoulder boulders n. Large breasts; gazungas.
shreddies n. Undercrackers; kecks; underpants; trolleys.
Sigourney Weaver rhym. slang Beaver; Davey Crockett's hat.
sing sweet violets euph. Airy alternative to building a log cabin (qv); to
take a dump.
siphon the python euph. Point Percy (qv) at the porcelain; have a piss.
sixth gear n. Wanking, esp. in a parked car.
skid marks n. Severe russet gusset (qv); pebble dashing (qv) of the
undercrackers.
slap the monkey See bash the bishop.
skin boat n. Penis. As in: "I'll take the old skin boat to tuna town". attr.
Burgess Meredith.
skin flick n. Art house film; blue movie; mamba matinee.
skin flute See fleshy flugelhom, bed flute.
skull buggery euph. Pugwash; salami sucking.
slapper n. Slag; dirty woman. She who has been a round a bit.
slash n. A piss; wee wee.
slash and burn n. 1. Deforestation technique. 2. A painful symptom of
venereal disease.
slime (ss-loym) Aus v. To ejaculate; chuck ones muck. As in: "Hev yer slimed
yet Bruce?" "Will yer shat ap Sheila, ya puttin'me orf".
sloppy seconds n. To be towards the back of a train (qv). See also stirring
the porridge.
slit n. Blit; fanny; vertical bacon sandwich.
smoke the bald man euph. To light up a salami cigarette. Also smoke the
white owl.
snatch n. Quim; vagina.
snatch mouse n. Tampon.
snowball v. To blow salami cigarette smoke back into the tobacconists mouth.
Sort of thing.
soapy tit wank n. Sausage sandwich (qv) served in the bath or shower.
sour apple quickstep euph. Suffering from diarrhoea. As in: "Your wife is
taking rather a long time in the powder room". "Yes, I'm afraid she's
dancing the sour apple quickstep this evening". See also Tijuana cha-cha.
spadger Aus n. Vagina.
spam alley n. The ideal venue for spam javelin (qv) throwing.
spam javelin n. Penis.
spam sceptre euph. Penis; pork sword (qv); cock.
spasm chasm See spam alley.
spend tuppence in ha'pennies and farthings euph. To pass loose stools; have
diarrhoea.
spider's legs n. Of muffs (qv) rogue pubic hairs which protrude beyond the
the knicker line.
spit roast n. To be simultaneously skewered at both ends by pork swords
(qv); a sausage jockey (qv) who plays a pink oboe (qv) whilst still in the
saddle.
splash me boots euph. To have a piss.
split a kipper euph. male To have sex. As in "This lady appears to like me.
With luck I may later have the opportunity to split a kipper".
sponge n. Of homosexual relationships, the submissive, feminine partner; the
noshee as opposed to the nosher. Usually the thin one. See also stone.
spooge US n. Semen.
sprogdrop n. Pregnancy. As in: "Congratulations. I hear your wife's
suffering from sprogdrop".
spunk n. 1. slang Semen. 2. Spirit; pluck. 3. Tinder made from fungus. 4.
Aus. Good looking man; dish; hunk.
spunk dustbin See bucket fanny, box of assorted creams (qv). Also spunk
bucket.
spurt your curd euph. Spread your spunk; infect others with your pluck and
spirit.
squirts n. The condition also known as the sour apple quick step. Also
squitters, squite.
steak drapes n. Gammon goalposts; beef curtains (qv).
stench trench disaffictionate euph. Fanny.
steg n. Woman resembling a ferocious, spiny, squat, prehistoric dinosaur,
abbr. Stegosaurus. See also shed; swamp donkey.
sticky belly flap cock n. A post wank condition suffered by bishop bashers
(qv).
stiffy n. A bone on; erection.
Stilton muffle n. Pungent and unwashed fish mitten (qv).
stirring the porridge euph. To have sloppy seconds; to dip into a box of
assorted creams (qv).
stoat n. Beaver; hairy clam.
stone n. Of gay men and women, the opposite of a sponge (qv). The dominant
partner. And usually no oil painting either.
strain your greens euph. To have a piss.
strangle Kojak euph. Male masturbation; peeling the carrot; stroking the
wookie. See Kojaks roll-neck.
stroke mag n. Top shelf literature; art pamphlet; gentleman's interest
magazine.
swamp donkey n. A female bereft of physical beauty; tug boat; boiler; sea
monster; steg.
switch hitter US n. Bisexual; AC/DC; one who bends both ways. Deriv.
baseball - the ability to bat with both hands.
sword swallower n. Sword as in the pork variety.
T
tackle See wedding tackle.
tackleshack n. Underpants.
tadger n. Penis.
tadpole yoghurt euph. A dressing to accompany a sausage sandwich (qv).
tagnuts n. Winnits; dangleberries; mince medallions.
tail gunner See rear gunner.
taint n. Niffkin's bridge (qv). "Tain't arse and 'tain't fanny".
take a Chinese singing lesson euph. Have a piss.
taking Captain Picard to warp speed TV baldy / cock euph. Masturbation;
strangling Kojak.
tallywhacker n. jovial Penis; old man.
Tardis fanny n. Deceptively spacious snatch (qv); bargain bucket (qv).
tatty water (ta-tee-wa-ta) n. Spud juice; semen. Literally - potato water.
tea towel holder euph. Anus. From the 1950s plastic 'finger poke style'
kitchen accessory.
technicolour yawn See pavement pizza.
teggat n. A short tea towel holder (qv) and the fish mitten (qv). From ten
pin bowling.
tenpin v. To place digits simultaneously in the tea towel holder (qv) and
the fish mitten (qv). From ten pin bowling.
thrap v. To masturbate furiously; to give it six nowt on the Right
Honourable member for Underpants.
three legged beaver euph. Homosexual.
thruppeny bits rhym. slang Tits. abbr. thrups.
throwing a Woodbine down Northumberland Street euph. Newcastle Unsatisfying
sex with a bucket fannied (qv) individual. As in: "Why man, it was like
throwin' a fuckin' Woodbine doon Northumberland Street". Also Leeds throwing
a sausage up Briggate.
thunder box n. archaic Lavatory; water closet.
thunder mug n. Chamber pot.
Tijuana cha-cha n. Diarrhoea. See sour apple quickstep.
tiffter n. An unwanted erection.
tit fairies n. The fictional visitors who magically transform the wife's
fried eggs (qv) into TNTs (qv) during pregnancy.
tit wank See soapy tit wank.
TNTs abbr. Two nifty tits.
toosh n. Totty. From US tush v. meaning arse.
tonsil hockey n. Kissing. As in: "Fancy a game of tonsil hockey?"
top bollocks n. Breasts.
topless hand shandy n. A service available from rub-a-tug shops (qv) for
between £5 and £25.
toss v. 1. To wank. 2. To flip pancakes during cooking.
toss parlour See rub-a-tug shop.
tosspot n. A person held in low esteem; a fuckwit.
totty n. chauvinistic Girls; fanny. As in: "Hey, this car's a fanny magnet
(qv). Since I bought it I've had to beat off the totty with a shitty stick".
touching cloth n. The stage immediately after turtles head (qv) when the
stool establishes contact with the undergarments. As in: "Is there a toilet
anywhere round here mate? I'm touching cloth".
tradesmen's entrance euph. Back passage.
train See pull a train.
trolleys n. Kecks; underpants.
trots See squirts.
trouser cough n. Fart; botty burp.
trouser Mauser n. A small rapid firing porridge gun (qv).
trouser trumpet n. 1. A fart. 2. The anus.
tubesteak n. A beef bayonet on the bone.
tug boat n. A woman of plain appearance and a compact, muscular build; swamp
donkey (qv).
tummy truncheon n. Sixth gear stick; porridge gun; penis.
tuna town n. Female genitalia. See also skin boat.
tuppence licker n. Lesbian.
turning Japanese euph. Wanking. See also grin like a wanking Jap.
turtle's head n. The initial protrusion of a stool though the chocolate
starfish (qv); the point at which contracts are exchanged for the building
of a log cabin (qv). See also touching cloth.
twat n. 1. A stupid person. 2. A minge.
two puppies fighting in a bag euph. Large, mobile and unrestrained breasts.
two up n. Two up.
Twix lips n. A front bottom (qv) version of hungry arse (qv). See also
camel's foot.
U
U blocker n. A turd so big it causes a jobbie jam in the plumbing system.
U.D.I. Unidentified drinking injury. A mysterious injury received during a
bender (qv) and of which the victim has no recollection.
undefuckable adj. Damaged beyond repair.
up to your nuts in guts euph. male Aus. Engaged in sexual intercourse.
undercarriage n. Genitalia (male or fem); wedding tackle.
undercrackers n. Keeks; shreddies; Y fronts.
unit n. Penis. As in: "I slipped her my unit".
uphill gardener euph. He who hoes on the pink allotments; the pusher of a
cheesey wheelbarrow (qv) up the kak canyon; a male homosexual.
V
vadge n. Vagina; fish mitten. Also US vag.
Valentines Day porridge n. Semen.
veiny bang stick n. Penis; one eyed trouser snake.
Velcro triangle n. Minge; mott; mapatasi. Also Velcro valley.
vertical bacon sandwich n. That which is clearly visible in hamburger shots
(qv). Also vertical smile, vertical taco.
vinegar strokes n. male The final, climactic stages of intercourse or
masturbation. As in: "Would you believe it? The phone rang just as I was
getting onto the vinegar strokes". From the similar facial expressions
achieved when sipping vinegar.
vixen n. A wily bird; a young temptress; a foxy chick. e.g. Stevie Nicks in
about 1978.
vixer n. A sausage eater (not euph.) who hogs all the beach beds on foreign
holidays.
vurp n. A burp which brings up a small but foul tasting quantity of stomach
contents, small enough to be gulped straight back down again.
W
walnut n. Gland up the male arse which causes immediate ejaculation when
poked.
walnut manouvre n. The mythical method by which good looking nurses are
trained to poke your walnut (qv) in order to obtain a sperm sample.
wank 1. n. Rubbish; nonsense. "That is a load of wank". 2. n. Masturbation.
"That was a dead good wank". 3. v. To masturbate. "I really enjoy wanking".
wanker n. 1. He who wanks. 2. A fellow road user; a motorist at whom one
waves. As in: "Yeah... and you too, you wanker".
wankily adj. Badly; sub standard. "He did that really wankily".
wank sock n. A sock used in wanking. Possibly tied to a bed post and
designed to indicate when wind conditions are suitable for masturbation.
wanking spanners n. Hands.
wap-waps n. Breasts. Also dedoo-wap-waps.
waz v. variously To piss; to puke; to wank.
wazzed adj. To be pissed, puked or wanked, presumably.
wear the beard v. To perform oral sex on a woman. Of lesbians, the stone
(qv). As in: "You can tell she wears the beard". Not to be confused with
beard (qv).
wedding tackle n. The male genitalia.
wedge v. To pull another's underpants up the crack of their arse. n. A
wedgie.
welly top n. A term used to describe the vagina. "She had a fanny like a
welly top".
whanger n. Large penis. As in: "My, that's a fair whanger you have in your
pants".
wheek v. Scotch. To remove shit from an aeroplane toilet.
wheel tapping at the Bourneville factory euph. Dabbling in homosexual
practices; the apprenticeship served prior to qualifying as a fully fledged
coco shunter (qv).
whidgey n. Eire Front bottom.
whiff of lavender euph. Suspicion of a beard (qv) bride. As in: "I don't
know about Edward. There's a whiff of lavender about that marriage".
white mouse n. Tampon.
whitewater wristing euph. To pull your pud; masturbate.
white wee wee n. Planet Skaros Dalek term for semen.
willnots n. Tagnuts; dangleberries. Arse fudge entwined in the kak canyon
foliage which simply will not come off.
Willy Woofter rhym. slang Poofter.
wind jammer n. A brownpipe engineer (qv) who leaves his tool in the wind
pipe.
winky 1. n. A baby's cock. 2. adj. Having a tendency to wink.
winkybag 1. n. A baby's scrotum. 2. n. An ugly woman who winks a lot.
winnie n. Lesbian; she who licks the honey pot.
winnit n. Kling-on; dangleberry (qv); brown room hangers on.
wood n. Erectness of the cock. "I have got wood".
woody n. An erection.
X
X-ray specs n. Spectacles usually available by mail order only from crappy
magazines which enable the wearer to see through a woman's clothing.
XXX A special video certificate awarded to pornographic films of
exceptionally poor sound and picture quality.
xylophone v. To move along a fine of naked women who are all bending down,
and spank their bottoms - which are of varying sizes - with ones penis; to
play a tune on womens buttocks. From the Greek xylo meaning wood (qv) and
phonnicus meaning to hit tunefully.
Y
yabba dabbas n. The climactic stages of intercourse; vinegar strokes (qv).
yak n. 1. A large, hairy animal of untidy appearance. 2. Feminist's beaver
(qv); minge with a pant moustache (qv).
Y bone steak n. The female opposite of a tubesteak (qv).
yongles US n. Testicles.
yank the plank euph. To spank your plank.
yarbles n. Testicles. attr. A Clockwork Orange.
Z
zeps abbr. Zeppelins euph. Large breasts. Also Hindenburgs.
zig-a-zig ahhh! onomatopoeia To have a bloody good wank while watching a
Spice Girls video.
Zinzanbrook (zin-zan-bruk) NZ rhym. slang Fuck; have sex.
zipperfish n. Penis; trouser trout; underpant eel, etc.
zorba v. To have sex with a native whilst on holiday in Greece. As in: "Did
you zorba?"
zuffle v. To wipe one's cock on the curtains after having sex in a posh
bird's house.
--
Kadaitcha Man
Moderator: alt.os.windows-xp
Moderator: alt.support.shyness
DISCLAIMER: This post does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either
myself, my company, my friends, my goldfish or my neighbour's dog; don't
quote me on that; don't quote me on anything; all rights reserved; this
post is distribution copyrighted to the extent that you may distribute this
post and all its associated parts freely but you may not make a profit from
it or include the post in commercial publications without written permission
from the Prime Minister of Hutt Province; other copyright laws for specific
posts apply wherever noted; posts are subject to change without notice;
posts are slightly enlarged to show detail; any resemblance to actual
persons, living or dead, is unintentional and purely coincidental; hand wash
only, tumble dry on low heat; do not bend, fold, mutilate, or spindle; do
not pass go; do not collect $200; your mileage may vary; no substitutions
allowed; for a limited time only; this post is void where prohibited, taxed,
or otherwise restricted; the post is provided "as is" without any warranties
expressed or implied; user assumes full liabilities; not liable for damages
due to use or misuse; an equal opportunity abuse employer; no shoes, no
shirt; quantities are limited while supplies last; if defects are
discovered, do not attempt to fix them yourself but return to an authorised
post service centre; caveat emptor; read at your own risk; parental
advisory - explicit words; text may contain material some readers may find
objectionable, parental guidance is advised; keep away from sunlight, pets
and small children; limit one-per-family; no money down; no purchase
necessary; to approved purchasers only; facsimiles are acceptable in South
Australia; you need not be present to win; some assembly required; batteries
not included; action figures sold separately; no preservatives added; tools
not included; safety goggles may be required during use; sealed for your
protection, do not use if the safety seal is broken; call before you dig;
for external use only; if a rash, redness, irritation or swelling develops,
discontinue use; use only with proper ventilation; avoid extreme
temperatures and store in a cool, dry place; keep away from open flames and
avoid inhaling fumes; avoid contact with mucous membranes; do not puncture,
incinerate, or store above 60 degrees Centigrade; do not place near
flammable or magnetic source; keep away from naked flames, keep away from
old flames; smoking these posts may be hazardous to your health; the best
safeguard, second only to abstinence, is the use of a good laugh; text used
in these posts is made from 100% recycled electrons and magnetic particles;
no animals were used to test the hilarity of these posts other than Dazza;
no salt, MSG, artificial colour or flavour added; if ingested, do not induce
vomiting, if symptoms persist, consult your humourologist; posts are ribbed
for your pleasure; slippery when wet; must be 18 to enter; possible
penalties for early withdrawal; post offer valid only at participating news
sites; slightly higher in South Australia; allow four to six weeks for
delivery; disclaimer does not cover hurricane, lightning, tornado, tsunami,
volcanic eruption, earthquake, flood, orgasm, misuse, self-abuse, neglect,
unauthorised repair, damage from improper installation, broken antenna,
marred cabinet, incorrect line voltage, missing or altered serial numbers,
sonic boom vibrations, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts or
other Acts of God; incidents owing to aeroplane crash, ship sinking, motor
vehicle accidents, leaky roof, broken glass, falling rocks, mud slides,
forest fire, flying projectiles or dropping the item are also excluded;
other restrictions may apply. If something offends you, lighten up get a
life, and move on. All conditions apply. Not available in all stores.
Kadaitcha Man
> Complaint sent to ab...@altopia.com
Send it twice if you like...
aunt Mary n. Vagina.
axe wound euph. Vagina.
bean flicker n. Lesbian.
beef curtains euph. Labia.
blit n. See blart.
can US n. Bottom.
cavalier n. Uncircumcised penis.
chebs n. Tits; breasts.
cheese See knob-cheese.
chocolate eye n. Bumhole.
chuckles n. Balls.
chuffle plug n. Tampon.
chutney locker n. Rectum.
conkers See hairy conkers.
corybungo n. Arse; backside.
crab ladder n. Penis.
cream v. To ejaculate.
diddles See diddy ride.
dirtbox n. Rectum.
dunkie n. Contraceptive sheath.
fairy hammock n. Panties.
fanny flange n. Clitoris.
finsbury bridge See barse.
gazoo n. Arse; bum.
gazungas n. Large breasts.
gick Eire n. Shit.
grub See biffin.
gusset nuzzler euph. Lesbian.
hairy goblet Seehairy lasso.
jam rag n. Tampon.
jittler n. Helmet cheese.
jobby Scotch variation Job.
Johnny See rubber Johnny.
keech n. Crap; kak.
kitten hammock n. Bra.
kittens noses n. Nipples.
lettuce n. Female genitalia.
lils n. Tits.
liquid laughter n. Puke.
loon pipe n. Anus.
lotties n. Breasts.
minnie moo n. Minge.
mott n. Minge; mapatasi.
mud n. Excrement.
nadbag n. Nutsack; scrotum.
norks n. Knockers.
puppies n. affectionate Breasts.
rectal retort n. Fart.
rib cushions euph. Breasts.
Roger Ramjet n. Botter.
snatch n. Quim; vagina.
snatch mouse n. Tampon.
spadger Aus n. Vagina.
spam javelin n. Penis.
spooge US n. Semen.
tackleshack n. Underpants.
tadger n. Penis.
top bollocks n. Breasts.
trolleys n. Kecks; underpants.
trots See squirts.
tuppence licker n. Lesbian.
wanking spanners n. Hands.
white mouse n. Tampon.
woody n. An erection.
yongles US n. Testicles.
--
Kadaitcha Man
Moderator: alt.os.windows-xp
Moderator: alt.support.shyness
DISCLAIMER: This post does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either
John Dybwad
OS's?
What brand computers (dell or hp by any chance?)??
I'm assuming you are installing the software/drivers properly?
"Garry Lanier" <garry...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:wjX99.6011$MC2....@news-server.bigpond.net.au...
Kadaitcha Man
news:umgpsdg...@corp.supernews.com...
> Do you have a certain software package standardized across all computers
and
> OS's?
> What brand computers (dell or hp by any chance?)??
Hey, dumbfuck. Yes, you. It's in his previous posts. Go and fucking find it
instead of being a lazy arse and asking him to post it again.
Garry Lanier
I believe I have found the solution.
Also with the kindest of intentions; How do people on the newsgroups he
post to put up with the guy called Kadaitcha Man?
I know I sometimes ask question that are simple for the pundits here or
wherever but that guy is bordering on being abusive and a nuisance to all, I
believe.
Regards
"John Dybwad" <jdy...@gra.midco.net> wrote in message
news:umgpsdg...@corp.supernews.com...
Kadaitcha Man
news:e5tgmu8mfo9hsv9hc...@4ax.com...
> On Sun, 25 Aug 2002 13:23:39 +1000, "Kadaitcha Man"
> <hahah...@fooq.com> wrote:
>
> >"Lane Lewis" <myn...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
> >news:iLX99.599$Hl4...@nwrddc03.gnilink.net...
> >> Take your bogus award elsewhere. There is a realistic way to solve your
> >> problem " Call a Professional " If your to cheap to call a pro who's
gonna
> >> believe your going to send the reward.
> >
> >Hey, you dumbfuck pillock... yes, you. Gazwad is hot on the trail of
winning
> >the reward. If you piss the OP off and Gazwad doesn't get his just
deserts
> >as a result, I will hunt you down all over usenet and make your miserable
> >existance on usenet more miserable than it is now. Then I'll sue you for
> >Gazwad's reward.
>
> psots "moderator" hes a pathetic cripple who masturbates at home
> living with mom who talks tough on the net because his head was pushed
> into the toilet by bullies when he was kid.
>
> Look at his posts. Content free and wrong as usual.
>
> Only child porners and kooks post through alt.net .
> Which are you?
You work it out. I also fuck my sister, let the dog lick my dick, stand on
railway platforms exposing myself to women, and I pull the eyes out of dead
bodies so I can fuck their cold brains. Oh, I also fuck kangaroos and sheep.
Jackson
<hahah...@fooq.com> wrote:
>"John Dybwad" <jdy...@gra.midco.net> wrote in message
>news:umgpsdg...@corp.supernews.com...
>> Do you have a certain software package standardized across all computers
>and
>> OS's?
>> What brand computers (dell or hp by any chance?)??
>
>Hey, dumbfuck. Yes, you. It's in his previous posts. Go and fucking find it
>instead of being a lazy arse and asking him to post it again.
Taking votes :
a) How many think this idiot is a 98 pound, ugly weakling who takes
his frustrations out on the net?
b) How many think hes a neurotic old guy who is a 300 pound mess of
blubbler?
Kadaitcha Man
> Also with the kindest of intentions; How do people on the newsgroups he
> post to put up with the guy called Kadaitcha Man?
>
> I know I sometimes ask question that are simple for the pundits here or
> wherever but that guy is bordering on being abusive and a nuisance to all,
I
> believe.
Bordering? Fuck me dead. I'm slipping.
Kadaitcha Man
news:0jugmukjkacrfv05v...@4ax.com...
All wrong... but only just... misattributed gender.
Seth C
<garry...@yahoo.com> wrote:
>
>Also with the kindest of intentions; How do people on the newsgroups he
>post to put up with the guy called Kadaitcha Man?
>
>I know I sometimes ask question that are simple for the pundits here or
>wherever but that guy is bordering on being abusive and a nuisance to all, I
>believe.
Many news reader programs have these cool things called kill filters.
I put in his email address and *presto* every message he posts from
now on goes straight to the trash where it belongs. THATS how I
handle scum like him.
Seth
Jeff Cochrane
"Kadaitcha Man" <hahah...@fooq.com> wrote in message
news:ak9tgn$noi$0...@pita.alt.net...
<SNIP>
> You work it out. I also fuck my sister, let the dog lick my dick, stand on
> railway platforms exposing myself to women, and I pull the eyes out of dead
> bodies so I can fuck their cold brains. Oh, I also fuck kangaroos and sheep.
> --
> Kadaitcha Man
> Moderator: alt.os.windows-xp
> Moderator: alt.support.shyness
So, hows the weather in Tasmania at this time of year?
Jeff C.
---
Bhgtbvat znvy vf pregvsvrq Ivehf Serr.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.384 / Virus Database: 216 - Release Date: 21/08/2002
kony
<hahah...@fooq.com> wrote:
<snip>
Whatever is lacking in your life, isn't going to come to you in this
manner. Thinking these "contributions" to usenet will somehow fulfill
you is done in err, that obviously isn't happening...
Fill in the blank:
___________ is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting
different results.
I expect you'll just flame away as is your normal reaction, but think
about what I wrote.
__________________________
Please Reply to Newsgroup,
Steven R. Gerber
Please give us some details of the solution.
Steven
Gazwad
|
| Fill in the blank:
|
|*garry laimer* is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting
| different results.
|
<SNIP>
Is that the right answer? Did I win a fucking prize yet?
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
You moron.
--
Gazwad
Freelance scientist and people tester.
Guardian: alt.os.windows-xp
Moderator: alt.warez.uk
Kadaitcha Man
news:aka8ic$1gr833$1...@ID-135764.news.dfncis.de...
>
> "Kadaitcha Man" <hahah...@fooq.com> wrote in message
> news:ak9tgn$noi$0...@pita.alt.net...
> <SNIP>
> > You work it out. I also fuck my sister, let the dog lick my dick, stand
on
> > railway platforms exposing myself to women, and I pull the eyes out of
dead
> > bodies so I can fuck their cold brains. Oh, I also fuck kangaroos and
sheep.
> So, hows the weather in Tasmania at this time of year?
Dunno. I'm not booked to fly there until November.
--
Kadaitcha Man
Moderator: alt.hackers.malicious
Kadaitcha Man
news:3d68ab8d...@netnews.insightbb.com...
> On Sun, 25 Aug 2002 16:29:40 +1000, "Kadaitcha Man"
> <hahah...@fooq.com> wrote:
>
> <snip>
>
> Whatever is lacking in your life, isn't going to come to you in this
> manner. Thinking these "contributions" to usenet will somehow fulfill
> you is done in err, that obviously isn't happening...
>
> Fill in the blank:
>
> ___________ is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting
> different results.
>
> I expect you'll just flame away as is your normal reaction, but think
> about what I wrote.
Look, I'll be honest... thinking about blank spaces obviously comes easy to
you. Please don't have the same expectation of your betters.
Kadaitcha Man
news:ci8hmus29h8sgoeeu...@4ax.com...
Yeah, that's how you handle it, but hey... if you want to go about your life
like that, well, the garbage bin is over there...
<fx: readies berserker...>
Garry Lanier
Here is the one I believe that will work, for testing many machines, as I
have.
Thanks all who wrote to me. The winner will pick their 2200 Business
printer next week when I have confirmed the below.
Here is his solution:
Take a bare bones machine with USB support
Partition the Hard drive into three drives, C and D and E
Place Win 95 (USB supported) and Win 98 CAB files on E
Install Boot Magic on E
Install Win 95 with USB support on C and Win 98 on D; minimum installations
then
Xcopy the installations to sub directories on E
Install Scanner software on say C or D
The scanners always work on the first installation
When the installations stop working
Uninstall the software and delete the Windows directory in C or D
Xcopy the correct installation back to C or D as required
And start again
"Steven R. Gerber" <S.Ge...@Verizon.net> wrote in message
news:3D68C2F8...@Verizon.net...
furnace
"Garry Lanier" <garry...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:wjX99.6011$MC2....@news-server.bigpond.net.au...
>
> Please read the answers to questions people have asked me
this is not an answer, it's a mess.
you have your soluton in amoung the other suggestions offered. Look for it
again. If you can't see it straight away stick with the half baked idea you
have accepted without even TRYING it
(sheesh - I may as well have suggested Norton Ghost and collected $1000 straight
up!)
k
Ben Myers
1. What IS the solution? I'm intrigued. Please tell us all after you have
stirred up a ruckus, albeit unintentionally.
2. Nobody wants to put up with the guy called Kadaitcha Man or his ilk. The
best policy is to not respond and hope he'll go away.
... Ben Myers
Lane Lewis
problems for years. People who disrupt groups are best delt with by sending
a complaint to their ISP who will investigate the matter and take
appropriate action. Do not respond and if you want you can killfile them.
As far as posting an award, for the five years I've been doing this no one
has ever collected. No matter how well intentioned the poster was. It seems
once they get their problem fixed we never here from them again.
The Official Usenet FAQ
http://www.faqs.org/usenet/
Lane
bnichols
going back outside into your sandbox to play with this; the
adults here are having *real* conversations....
B
> > >Hey, you dumbfuck pillock... yes, you. Gazwad is hot on the trail of
> winning
> >
> > SHUT UP Asshole. You patheic wanker. Look at the shit he puts in his
> > psots "moderator" hes a pathetic cripple who masturbates at home
> >
Kadaitcha Man
> 2. Nobody wants to put up with the guy called Kadaitcha Man or his ilk.
The
> best policy is to not respond and hope he'll go away.
Yes, hope. In vain.
Kadaitcha Man
> Actually its best not to cross post to so many groups as that's been
causing
> problems for years. People who disrupt groups are best delt with by
sending
> a complaint to their ISP who will investigate the matter and take
> appropriate action.
On the subject of your netKKKoping activities, fuckwad, did you send this in
yet...?
"Lane Lewis" <myn...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:YKY99.599$mb....@nwrddc01.gnilink.net...
> Complaint sent to ab...@altopia.com
Well, look, seeing you've done that, send this one as well... you
aunt Mary n. Vagina.
axe wound euph. Vagina.
bean flicker n. Lesbian.
beef curtains euph. Labia.
blit n. See blart.
can US n. Bottom.
cavalier n. Uncircumcised penis.
chebs n. Tits; breasts.
cheese See knob-cheese.
chocolate eye n. Bumhole.
chuckles n. Balls.
chuffle plug n. Tampon.
chutney locker n. Rectum.
conkers See hairy conkers.
corybungo n. Arse; backside.
crab ladder n. Penis.
cream v. To ejaculate.
diddles See diddy ride.
dirtbox n. Rectum.
dunkie n. Contraceptive sheath.
fairy hammock n. Panties.
fanny flange n. Clitoris.
finsbury bridge See barse.
gazoo n. Arse; bum.
gazungas n. Large breasts.
gick Eire n. Shit.
grub See biffin.
gusset nuzzler euph. Lesbian.
hairy goblet Seehairy lasso.
jam rag n. Tampon.
jittler n. Helmet cheese.
jobby Scotch variation Job.
Johnny See rubber Johnny.
keech n. Crap; kak.
kitten hammock n. Bra.
kittens noses n. Nipples.
lettuce n. Female genitalia.
lils n. Tits.
liquid laughter n. Puke.
loon pipe n. Anus.
lotties n. Breasts.
minnie moo n. Minge.
mott n. Minge; mapatasi.
mud n. Excrement.
nadbag n. Nutsack; scrotum.
norks n. Knockers.
puppies n. affectionate Breasts.
rectal retort n. Fart.
rib cushions euph. Breasts.
Roger Ramjet n. Botter.
snatch n. Quim; vagina.
snatch mouse n. Tampon.
spadger Aus n. Vagina.
spam javelin n. Penis.
spooge US n. Semen.
tackleshack n. Underpants.
tadger n. Penis.
top bollocks n. Breasts.
trolleys n. Kecks; underpants.
trots See squirts.
tuppence licker n. Lesbian.
wanking spanners n. Hands.
white mouse n. Tampon.
woody n. An erection.
yongles US n. Testicles.
--
Kadaitcha Man
Moderator: alt.os.windows-xp
Moderator: alt.support.shyness
DISCLAIMER: This post does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either
bnichols
on uselessnet. You don't impress us. Time to mod ye olde killfile again....
B
Kadaitcha Man
> Most of us were here before you were
Really? Put your money where your mouth is... here is a post from me dated
mid-year 1989... you know... the real old days when usenet was only ever run
on VAXen ... and a few Eunuchs boxes...
http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/jokes/89q2/toilet.378.html
Here is one dated early 1990.
http://www.netfunny.com/rhf/jokes/90q1/communist.1057.html
Your turn.
> know how things are on uselessnet.
Hmmm... And here's me back in 1988 actively involved in its development.
Funny that.
Ben Myers
Kadaitcha Man
> Your point being?
The one your head ends in.
bnichols
more than feeble attempts at schoolboy impudence or a certified case of Keyboard
Immunity Syndrome to impress me; you're lucky you got your little snipe in
before I added your name to my blacklist of childish users. That won't happen
again. And BTW, FYI, I'm 50 & have had either a .mil or .gov address since
'78. In case you had any doubts as to what either that or the fact that you'll
be in my killfile approx. 10 seconds after I hit the send button mean, I'll
translate for you in two words of one syllable each --
you lose. <snicker>
B, off to do something he should have an hour ago
Ben Myers
might even be funny. It's gotten worn out since then. End of discussion.
bnichols
You know how it is with kids these days, Ben. They think they invented
EVERYthing. <lol>
Bill
Kadaitcha Man
> I have <0 interest getting into a peeing contest with you,
Can't piss as far, huh. Figures.
Wayne Brown
> "Lane Lewis" <myn...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
> news:YKY99.599$mb....@nwrddc01.gnilink.net...
>> Complaint sent to ab...@altopia.com
> Well, look, seeing you've done that, send this one as well... you
<incredible amount of obscene garbage deleted>
Looks like it's time to clean the gutter -- the sewer rats are becoming
quite a nuisance.
*PLONK*
--
Wayne Brown | "When your tail's in a crack, you improvise
fwb...@bellsouth.net | if you're good enough. Otherwise you give
| your pelt to the trapper."
"e^(i*pi) = -1" -- Euler | -- John Myers Myers, "Silverlock"
The PC Guy
Please accept my apologies for being brain dead.
Now that I am clear on your situation, I'd guess the problem is with the
drivers for those scanners.
Since you bought 200 of them, I'd be on the phone to HP demanding they
either make them work or refund your money.
--
regards,
bruce
The PC Guy
Bruce Von Deylen
South Bend, Ind. USA
Serving the computer impaired in northern
Indiana and southwest lower Michigan
E-mail: pcguy<at>attbi<dot>com
Website: http://www.geocities.com/the_pc_guy_1627/index.htm
"Garry Lanier" <garry...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:wjX99.6011$MC2....@news-server.bigpond.net.au...
> The Problem again:
>
> Please read the answers to questions people have asked me
>
> "Ben Myers" <ben_...@charter.net> wrote in message
The PC Guy
Some people just love to start flame wars. Best way to treat them is to
ignore them. Don't even acknowledge that you read their posts.
--
regards,
bruce
The PC Guy
Bruce Von Deylen
South Bend, Ind. USA
Serving the computer impaired in northern
Indiana and southwest lower Michigan
E-mail: pcguy<at>attbi<dot>com
Website: http://www.geocities.com/the_pc_guy_1627/index.htm
"Garry Lanier" <garry...@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:BM_99.6554$MC2....@news-server.bigpond.net.au...
> Thanks for you help.
>
> I believe I have found the solution.
>
> Also with the kindest of intentions; How do people on the newsgroups he
> post to put up with the guy called Kadaitcha Man?
>
> I know I sometimes ask question that are simple for the pundits here or
> wherever but that guy is bordering on being abusive and a nuisance to all,
I
> believe.
>
> Regards
>
> "John Dybwad" <jdy...@gra.midco.net> wrote in message
> news:umgpsdg...@corp.supernews.com...
> > Do you have a certain software package standardized across all computers
> and
> > OS's?
> > What brand computers (dell or hp by any chance?)??
> > I'm assuming you are installing the software/drivers properly?
> >
> >
The PC Guy
In the case of this guy, I used Outlook Express's Block Sender feature.
That instantly removed all his posts from my view.
--
regards,
bruce
The PC Guy
Bruce Von Deylen
South Bend, Ind. USA
Serving the computer impaired in northern
Indiana and southwest lower Michigan
E-mail: pcguy<at>attbi<dot>com
Website: http://www.geocities.com/the_pc_guy_1627/index.htm
"Lane Lewis" <myn...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:9y7a9.1996$mb....@nwrddc01.gnilink.net...
Kadaitcha Man
news:hNqa9.68187$%v4.27...@e3500-atl2.usenetserver.com...
> In comp.sys.hp.hardware Kadaitcha Man <hahah...@fooq.com> wrote:
> > "Lane Lewis" <myn...@hotmail.com> wrote in message
> > news:YKY99.599$mb....@nwrddc01.gnilink.net...
> >> Complaint sent to ab...@altopia.com
>
> > Well, look, seeing you've done that, send this one as well... you
>
> <incredible amount of obscene garbage deleted>
>
> Looks like it's time to clean the gutter -- the sewer rats are becoming
> quite a nuisance.
>
> *PLONK*
Ta. That's 1,112 on google.
bnichols
them maddest are that (a) you struck before they did & (b) whatever they say in
reply is of absolutely 0 consequence to the target (as they are themselves),
since they know full well that the person they're trying their damnedest to
arouse with their moronic little childishness will Never Even See It.
Makes 'em madder than all hell, & frustrated even more than that, which I
personally figure to be a quite suitable punishment. }}:)
B
Kadaitcha Man
> Or just do what I did -- twit-filter the little twerps. The things that
make
> them maddest are that (a) you struck before they did & (b) whatever they
say in
> reply is of absolutely 0 consequence to the target (as they are
themselves),
> since they know full well that the person they're trying their damnedest
to
> arouse with their moronic little childishness will Never Even See It.
>
> Makes 'em madder than all hell, & frustrated even more than that, which I
> personally figure to be a quite suitable punishment. }}:)
Who of the regulars is prepared to give the bozo the big clue?
<makes note to self to dust off the berserker>
Kadaitcha Man
make
> them maddest are that (a) you struck before they did & (b) whatever they
say in
> reply is of absolutely 0 consequence to the target (as they are
themselves),
> since they know full well that the person they're trying their damnedest
to
> arouse with their moronic little childishness will Never Even See It.
>
> Makes 'em madder than all hell, & frustrated even more than that, which I
> personally figure to be a quite suitable punishment. }}:)
Talk about convenient... here's your free clue...
"Paul Cooke" <paul@cooke100_nospam.freeserve.co.uk> wrote in message
news:1654996.I...@cooke-one.madhouse...
> Kadaitcha Man wrote:
> ... firing off your stupid gibberish
> mail-to-news generated streams of noise that can't be
> easily killfiled.
<Now, where did I put that berserker...>
<AH!!!>
Michelle Rosborough
line and they reckon the older you get the wiser you get but this guy shit
he seems to have lost it somewhere and all he knows is abuse as no-one wants
a friend like that, as they say who needs friends when you've got enemies
like that. SO GO GET HELP YOU NEED IT BAD.
"Kadaitcha Man" <hahah...@fooq.com> wrote in message
news:ak9uq3$rj3$0...@pita.alt.net...
> "Jackson" <Tyr...@Jackson.com> wrote in message
> news:0jugmukjkacrfv05v...@4ax.com...
> > On Sun, 25 Aug 2002 15:24:02 +1000, "Kadaitcha Man"
> > <hahah...@fooq.com> wrote:
> >
> > >"John Dybwad" <jdy...@gra.midco.net> wrote in message
> > >news:umgpsdg...@corp.supernews.com...
> > >> Do you have a certain software package standardized across all
> computers
> > >and
> > >> OS's?
> > >> What brand computers (dell or hp by any chance?)??
> > >
find
> it
> > >instead of being a lazy arse and asking him to post it again.
> >
> >
> > Taking votes :
> >
> > a) How many think this idiot is a 98 pound, ugly weakling who takes
> > his frustrations out on the net?
> >
> >
> > b) How many think hes a neurotic old guy who is a 300 pound mess of
> > blubbler?
>
> All wrong... but only just... misattributed gender.
bnichols
trouble. Typical childish hit-&-runner. Normally I twit people like that on
sight, but I was occupied with more important matters (just about anything would
have qualified in his case <g>). Keyboard Immunity Syndrome coupled with an
inordinate sense of his own power, short on clues & long on an exaggerated sense
of self-importance. Frank Lloyd Wright had a saying that applies to little ones
like that -- "a waste of material." <chuckle>
Bill
Kadaitcha Man
> Nah, he's just a smart-@$$ malcontent who gets his jollies trying to stir
up
> trouble. Typical childish hit-&-runner. Normally I twit people like that
on
> sight, but I was occupied with more important matters (just about anything
would
> have qualified in his case <g>).
What you really mean is that twitting me is futile.
Cytisus scoparius
> Nah, he's just a smart-@$$ malcontent who gets his jollies trying to stir
up
> trouble. Typical childish hit-&-runner. Normally I twit people like that
on
> sight, but I was occupied with more important matters (just about anything
would
> have qualified in his case <g>).
What you really mean is that twitting me is futile.
--
Moritella
> Nah, he's just a smart-@$$ malcontent who gets his jollies trying to stir
up
> trouble. Typical childish hit-&-runner. Normally I twit people like that
on
> sight, but I was occupied with more important matters (just about anything
would
> have qualified in his case <g>).
What you really mean is that twitting me is futile.
--
bnichols
new aliases. <snicker>
B
Maurea blacki
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
Pigs fly.
Oliva aniomina
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
Pigs fly.
N2-3-Trifluoromethyl-Phenyl-5-Nitro-2-Furamide
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
Pigs fly.
Conus aureus paulucciae
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
Pigs fly.
Tetragenococcus
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
Pigs fly.
Copper
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
Pigs fly.
Kadaitcha Man
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
Pigs fly.
Crepis capillaris
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
Pigs fly.
Erythromonas
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
Pigs fly.
Botryocladia
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Micrococcales
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Marginella bullata
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Oliva bewleyi
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Aspredinidae
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
1-4-5-6-Tetrachloro-7-7-Dimethoxy-3-3-Nitroanilino-Carbonyl-Bicyclo-2.2.1-Hept-5-Ene-2-Carboxylic
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Still...
Desulfocapsa
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Still...
Erbium Nitrate Pentahydrate
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Still...
Caloramator
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Yet still...
N1-4-Trifluoromethoxy-Phenyl-Methylene-N2-4-Trifluoromethyl-2-Pyrimi
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Yet still...
Ceanothus greggii
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Yet still...
Halorhodospira
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Chlorogalum pomeridianum
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Yet still...
Lonchura kelaarti
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Still...
N2-2-5-Dichlorophenyl-5-2-Chlorophenyl-1-3-4-Thiadiazol-2-Amine
> Nope, little one -- I can killfille as fast or faster than you can come up
with
> new aliases. <snicker>
And the pigs are still flying.
Yet still...
bnichols
than you in my coffee cup in the morning. }:) <yawn>
B
bnichols
Perhaps it's because their are other ways than names to twit a twit, hmm? Of
course, those of us with more than a couple of clues to rub together about
uselessnet know how to block bozos both effortlessly *&* effectively. You don't
get old bein' no fool, y'know. };)
B
bnichols wrote:
> Indeed they do, child. You do indeed amuse. <lol> I've seen weirder things
> than you in my coffee cup in the morning. }:) <yawn>
>
> B
> >>
> > Pigs fly.
Lane Lewis
"bnichols" <to...@cox.net> wrote in message news:3D70DD84...@cox.net...
> What no more jerk messages for me this a.m.? I wonnnnnnder why. <snicker>
> Perhaps it's because their are other ways than names to twit a twit, hmm?
Of
> course, those of us with more than a couple of clues to rub together about
> uselessnet know how to block bozos both effortlessly *&* effectively. You
don't
> get old bein' no fool, y'know. };)
>
I don't bother with them other than sending in an abuse complaint, I think
this guy is in prison and would appreciate keeping his ISP.
Lane
bnichols
(ye olde Keyboard Immunity Syndrome), I enjoy being able to remind them what
*real* power is, i.e., rendering them totally ineffectual. As they say, the
classic definition of revenge is when the target sees it coming & knows that
there's not jack they can do about it. }}:) Besides, that way when they really
*do* go ballistic, you have undeniable ammunition to take to the ISP. ;)
B
Kadaitcha Man
> What no more jerk messages for me this a.m.? I wonnnnnnder why. <snicker>
> Perhaps it's because their are other ways than names to twit a twit, hmm?
Of
> course, those of us with more than a couple of clues to rub together about
> uselessnet know how to block bozos both effortlessly *&* effectively. You
don't
> get old bein' no fool, y'know. };)
Fuck, you're a huge wank.
Cypraea armeniaca brunnea
> Perhaps it's because their are other ways than names to twit a twit, hmm?
Of
> course, those of us with more than a couple of clues to rub together about
> uselessnet know how to block bozos both effortlessly *&* effectively. You
don't
> get old bein' no fool, y'know. };)
Fuck, you're a huge wank.
Cyclohexylamine
> Perhaps it's because their are other ways than names to twit a twit, hmm?
Of
> course, those of us with more than a couple of clues to rub together about
> uselessnet know how to block bozos both effortlessly *&* effectively. You
don't
> get old bein' no fool, y'know. };)
Fuck, you're a huge wank.
Loknar
are you sure man? thats pretty fast
N2-2-5-Dichlorophenyl-5-2-Chlorophenyl-1-3-4-Thiadiazol-2-Amine
<3rrekd...@dead.com> wrote in
news:CmVcUrbScF8h14FF...@dead.com: