88 Lines About 88 Muties
Kielle
"88 Lines For 44 Mutants"
(to the tune of "88 Lines For 44 Women" by Nails)
Penned and shamefully confessed-to by a very-bored Kelly
Newcomb (kie...@aol.com)
Characters are property of Marvel Comics. The song is by
Nails, wherever (and whoever!) they are. Sincere apologies
to both. Pardon the dash of language, but it's that way in
the original song, too
Author's Note: I guess I'm uploading this more as a kind of
"guessing game" than a fine work of fiction -- wherever
possible I used character's real names, NOT their
codenames. If you can recognize ALL of them, you're a
true Marvel maniac and can come share my padded cell!
Some of the lines may sound a touch odd -- that's because
either a) the character's name wouldn't quite fit (YOU try
scanning "Callisto" or "Maria" into a beat, ANY beat) and
you'll have to slur it faster, or b) the tempo of the original
line in the song was weird too! It's old and out-of-date. I'll
try to write better. Comments and groans at assorted
awful puns are feared but welcome, as always. <ducking
tomatoes> <G>
Betsy was a fashion star 'til she got the hero itch
Kwannon's not a mutie but still we don't know which is which
Maria is a wild one who oughta be spayed and set on mice
Meggan is an innocent whose main flaw is being nice
Ororo lives her lonely life in pantheistic metaphor
Frenzy isn't picky who or what she causes bruises for
Jenny wasn't ready for the magistrates her powers brought
Domino, who hides her name, isn't all that hard to spot
Lila doesn't see the harm in stealing hearts or stealing worlds
Rogue, the steel magnolia, dreams of kissing boys like other girls
Emma is a realist who knows just how to change your mind
Raven always has another face that she can hide behind
Sally's hard to get a hold of -- grab her and away she slips
Lorna has a strange attraction: Summers boys and paper clips
Jeannie, ever method acting, swipes the better dying scenes
Madelyne was just a clone trapped in bad designer genes
Belladonna lost her Gambit and her life on higher stakes
Joelle doesn't know her future -- does she have what it will take?
Alison's the disco queen who shined away her chance at fame
Jubilation's modern, plays as loud and brassy as her name
Tarot should have seen her ending written in the thirteenth key
Irene didn't need a crystal ball to see her destiny
Xian is plain but has a way of making you do as she wills
Tabitha thinks life is dull without a few explosive thrills
Uh-oh, not Boomer
Vertigo can give new meaning to the phrase "she turned my head"
Dear Cerise sure took to kissing -- did she learn as fast in bed?
Becky's just a little girl who's drawn to light like moth to flame
Callisto messed with Masque and never since was ever
quite the same
Rachel is a paradox, a messy Claremont future game
Siena may destroy the world in a wild attempt to blaze her name
Heather dances 'tween the seconds, makes the most of every day
Galen's sole misfortune was that she was born and bred a Grey
Theresa is her daddy's daughter -- check her costume, can't
you tell?
Rahne is sure that having fur is going to send her straight to hell
'Skani from the year 3000 came to find Nathaniel Christ
Amara had to go back home, almost got her fires iced
Dani loved her native land but found her calling in the sky
Andrea must hold her brother's hand to rule, by and by
Roulette didn't give a f*ck, trusting Lady Luck
Valerie's a bureaucrat who took the job, passed the buck
Ol' Selene can hide her hand in amid the power plans
Wanda's in the Magnus clan living life as best she can
Kitty uses "teenage mutant ninja" as her alibi
Illyana made us cry -- and on her name we'll say goodbye
Eighty-eight lines about forty-four muties...
Lady Amethyst
> "88 Lines For 44 Mutants"
> (to the tune of "88 Lines For 44 Women" by Nails)
> Author's Note: I guess I'm uploading this more as a kind of
> "guessing game" than a fine work of fiction -- wherever
> possible I used character's real names, NOT their
> codenames. If you can recognize ALL of them, you're a
> true Marvel maniac and can come share my padded cell!
So I'm wasting time.
I deleted the ones who's codenames were used.
> Betsy was a fashion star 'til she got the hero itch - Psylocke.
> Kwannon's not a mutie but still we don't know which is which - Psylocke's
new body.
> Maria is a wild one who oughta be spayed and set on mice - Feral
> Ororo lives her lonely life in pantheistic metaphor - Storm
> Jenny wasn't ready for the magistrates her powers brought - J Ransome
> Emma is a realist who knows just how to change your mind - White Queen
> Raven always has another face that she can hide behind - Mystique
> Sally's hard to get a hold of -- grab her and away she slips - Skids
> Lorna has a strange attraction: Summers boys and paper clips - Polaris
> Jeannie, ever method acting, swipes the better dying scenes - Jean Grey
> Alison's the disco queen who shined away her chance at fame - Dazzler
> Jubilation's modern, plays as loud and brassy as her name - Jubilee
> Irene didn't need a crystal ball to see her destiny - Destiny
> Xian is plain but has a way of making you do as she wills - Karma
> Tabitha thinks life is dull without a few explosive thrills - Meltdown
> Becky's just a little girl who's drawn to light like moth to flame
?
> Rachel is a paradox, a messy Claremont future game - Phoenix
> Heather dances 'tween the seconds, makes the most of every day - Tempo
> Theresa is her daddy's daughter -- check her costume, can't - Siryn
> you tell?
> Rahne is sure that having fur is going to send her straight to hell
- Wolfsbane
> 'Skani from the year 3000 came to find Nathaniel Christ - Askani
> Amara had to go back home, almost got her fires iced - Magma
> Dani loved her native land but found her calling in the sky - Mirage
> Andrea must hold her brother's hand to rule, by and by - Fenris
> Valerie's a bureaucrat who took the job, passed the buck - Val Cooper
> Ol' Selene can hide her hand in amid the power plans - Black Queen
> Wanda's in the Magnus clan living life as best she can - Scarlett Witch
> Kitty uses "teenage mutant ninja" as her alibi - Shadowcat
> Illyana made us cry -- and on her name we'll say goodbye - Magik
I got all of them bar one and I'm no continuity expert. You'll have to try
harder next time.
--
*Lady Amethyst* | Editor in Chief of x-writers at majordomo@
Keeper of the Labyrinth | minuteman.com http:\\minuteman.com\x-writers
Flame and Holy Virgin | http:\\gwis2.circ.gwu.edu\~hawk\xmen.html
of Scotland | "Dream a little dream of me." - Ella Fitzgerald
XXX
>From: Lady Amethyst <amet...@jadzia.demon.co.uk>
>Subject: Re: 88 Lines About 88 Muties
>Date: Fri, 05 Apr 96 22:07:41 GMT
>"Kielle" writes:
Rebecca "Lighttrakker" Littlehale. One appearance in Power Pack.
>> Rachel is a paradox, a messy Claremont future game - Phoenix
>> Heather dances 'tween the seconds, makes the most of every day - Tempo
>> Theresa is her daddy's daughter -- check her costume, can't - Siryn
>> you tell?
>> Rahne is sure that having fur is going to send her straight to hell
> - Wolfsbane
>> 'Skani from the year 3000 came to find Nathaniel Christ - Askani
>> Amara had to go back home, almost got her fires iced - Magma
>> Dani loved her native land but found her calling in the sky - Mirage
>> Andrea must hold her brother's hand to rule, by and by - Fenris
>> Valerie's a bureaucrat who took the job, passed the buck - Val Cooper
>> Ol' Selene can hide her hand in amid the power plans - Black Queen
>> Wanda's in the Magnus clan living life as best she can - Scarlett Witch
>> Kitty uses "teenage mutant ninja" as her alibi - Shadowcat
>> Illyana made us cry -- and on her name we'll say goodbye - Magik
>I got all of them bar one and I'm no continuity expert. You'll have to try
>harder next time.
Who's this "Joelle"? Anything to do with MST3K? (g)
-----------
Danny Sichel, eds...@umoncton.ca
Kielle
Hee hee -- yep, I know they weren't hard...they lulled into a false sense
of security until you hit Becky and Joelle! <G>
And x...@Umoncton.ca (XXX) sed thusly:
>Rebecca "Lighttrakker" Littlehale. One appearance in Power Pack.
Veeeeery good, wow! My hat is off to the both of you, but especially to
XXX for getting THAT one. Joelle (heh, MSTie joke from you, another
brownie point) is from an old New Muties issue -- I could get up and get
the number but I'm lazy. Suffice it to say that it's the issue when Sam
goes home to introduce Lila to the 'rents, and the writer implys that
brunette Joelle is the third child and the oldest daughter. NOT Paige.
Marvel, continuity check please!
Now back to the fanfics before I get in trouble for being off-track...
.-=K=-.