The Angels Saga - Selections

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Melanie and Daniel 11
Chapter One
Daniel was sitting out the front of Danielphon, with his earphones on, whiling away the day. It was a warm day, not too hot, and life was passing by out the front, people occasionally pointing at himself, a well known Seraphim, as they got along with their day in Zaphona city. He sat there, sipping on his flask of watermelon juice, which he'd made that morning for the day of sitting watching the world go by. It was just another day. Another day in paradise.
A couple with a kid walked past. They waved at Daniel and the kid yelled out 'Seraphim crazy dude'. Daniel gave him the finger in response, which caused the embarrassed parents to grab their child and move on. Yep, a typical day at Danielphon.
Later on he was inside for the afternoon grind. Ariel was in town today, doing work on her power women brunch business thing, and he was lonely. He put on a CD of the Spice Girls, grabbed the cold pizza, and sat there on the couch, relaxing. He looked at the photo of Valandriel on the wall, which was always motivation for the DanVal alliance, but thought he'd leave it be today. Not today.
He munched on his pizza.
Sat there.
Quiet.
Melanie C walked in as Viva Forever was playing.
'Well, here you are,' she said. 'Finally found you.'
He looked at her. 'I haven't exactly been hiding, babe.'
She looked at him, and sat down next to him.
'Yes, I can sense it. Just like Meludiel and Ariel have said. Greatly diminished. Far, far less of it now.'
'Far far less of what?' asked Daniel perplexed.
'Daniel!' she replied, and picked up the CD cover for the Spice Girls album, looked at it briefly, and then picked up a copy of Vogue magazine, leaving Daniel gawking at her, thinking about what she had said.
'I assure you I am still 100% Daniel,' said Daniel, almost defiantly, as if his manhood was at stake.
She turned to him.
'No. No, you're not. You're Daniel the Seraphim again.'
He thought on that, looked at her briefly, then looked forward, lying back in the couch.
'That's exactly my point,' said Melanie. 'You actually use your brain now, which is a rarity. You think about what people say. The crazed impulsive sarcastic quick replies are gone. Ariel has been saying so for months now.'
'No there not,' he replied. He looked at her. 'Are they?'
'I think you finally got over your ego rush,' said Melaniel. 'Back to the way God made you to start with.'
'Oh,' said Daniel.
She put down the magazine. 'I'll pick you up. Tonight. About 6. We'll go to Az's place, and then out to the disco.'
'Sure,' he replied.
She kissed him then, on the cheek. 'It's really a pleasant relief, bro. I much prefer the original Daniel. Once he got over his Meludiel crush, he was quite fine.'
'Gee, thanks,' replied Daniel.
And then Melanie was gone, leaving a perplexed Daniel the Seraphim wondering what all that was about.
* * * * *
Everything was opposite. Melaniel had her tongue down Daniel's throat. Melanie paid the bill. Melanie drove the 'Danielmobile' around Zaphona city. Melanie decided when they were going home, at about 3 in the morning, and they did, and Melanie pushed Daniel down to satisfy HER desire in the masterbed of Danielphon. And Daniel just took it.
It was 3 weeks later, he was with the old man, Cherubim Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly, who looked at him.
'Change is a bullshit excuse,' said Cherubim Daniel.
'It's all I've got,' said Daniel, pouring out some Nutri Grain at the breakfast table of Danielphon.
'Nutrigrain?' asked Cherubim Daniel. 'Where the frick are the fruit loops? Luladiel jokes are now ancient on fruit loops. Don't tell me you've sold out son?'
'That's getting old,' said Seraphim Daniel. 'I think you need some new material for your woman. Anyway, I've noticed Callodyn gawking at her these days. I think he's trying to get them back.'
'He's got buckleys and none,' replied Cherubim Daniel, shaking his head at the healthy Nutrigrain being eaten by his offspring.
Melanie came in. She was in her knickers and a T-Shirt which had 'Girl Power' on it.
'So you da bitch then?' Cherubim Daniel asked her.
'Bite it Danny Boy,' replied Melanie, took the toast which Seraphim Daniel had buttered and put marmalade on, and was about to eat, and grabbed a can of Coke, and disappeared back to her room.
'I see she wears the fricking pants now,' said Cherubim Daniel, shaking his head disapprovingly at his boy.
'She's tough,' said Daniel. 'I love her. I can't afford to lose her. She told me that when she did my astrological reading.'
'For fuck's sake,' said Cherubim Daniel, shaking his head looking at his son.
'I need her,' said Daniel the Seraphim, almost weakly. 'We NEED our women so much. She has told me that. Without them we'd be nothing.'
'For fuck's sake,' said Daniel again. 'She's given you the works by the looks of it. I think this is what the power women of Zaphona city have been chatting about on and off for ages now. How to rule the world. I've heard whispers of their tactics.'
'I love Melanie with all my heart,' said Daniel, looking up with innocent eyes at his father.
'For fuck's sake,' said Cherubim Daniel, continuing to shake his head in unbelief. Something NEEDED to be done.
* * * * *
'It's pretty special,' said Daniel, looking at the aquamarine pendant.
'I think so,' said Melaniel, trying it on around her neck. 'You'll buy it for me of course,' she said winking. He produced his card. They were in Zaphona's most expensive jewellery store, with ancient items from the early years. Very, very expensive items because of their age.
Melaniel put the green and brown tropical dress on when she got home, and displayed her pendant with pride. She felt a million bucks.
Cherubim Daniel was at the table with his son.
'She happy?' he asked her.
'She's a million bucks. I can tell,' said Daniel in reply.
Cherubim Daniel nodded. 'Buy her that Powerpuff Girls Comic she's wanted for aeons. I'll lend you the cash if you need it.'
'It's a major investment old man. That's 2020s stuff. None of that for sale these days.'
'The store has had it on commission forever,' replied Cherubim Daniel. 'May as well claim it now.'
'I'll look into it,' replied Seraphim Daniel. 'Anyway, she's happy. Astrology charts aren't that important anymore. Pride isn't that important anymore. She's happy.'
'It's called middle age malaise,' replied Cherubim Daniel soberly. 'In our ancient days it comes to us at times. We think love is the final answer and we give our loved ones all their say. It's a phase. It will pass. Probably best to go with the flow of it for now, because we do love our loved ones. But you'll get back to yourself soon enough.'
Daniel looked at his old man. 'Fine,' he said, and stood and got the fruit loops from the cupboard. Melanie came in and said 'I don't think so,' trying to snatch them, but Daniel grabbed the, and gave her a look.
'Yes boss,' she said softly. 'If you insist then. But YOU are supposed to eventually look at your own health choices. We shouldn't have to rebuke you forever.'
'He's marginally overweight,' said Cherubim Daniel. 120 kilograms. For his height its not really a problem. A slight belly. I bet it doesn't really bother you.'
Melanie glared at Cherubim Daniel and sat down. 'No, the weight is fine. But he should seek to be perfect eventually. Those things are a once a year treat at most. Not every fricking day.'
Daniel poured out his fruit loops, poured on the milk, and ate.
'Yep,' he replied. 'Once a year at most.'
Melanie just looked on disapprovingly.
'Anyway, he loves you heaps,' said Cherubim Daniel to Melanie.
'I know,' she replied. 'He's faithful to his primary lovers. He doesn't stray any more.'
Daniel looked up at her. 'Of course not dear, ' and stole a glance at his old man.
'Yeh,' said Cherubim Daniel. 'Faithful. Well I must be going. Going home today. See you again next year the same time.'
Daniel went off to pack, and Melanie looked at Daniel. 'Tonight we have a treat. The girls will be coming around.'
'Brilliant,' said Daniel. It could be an interesting evening.
Chapter Two
'dn't peek,' said Victoria to Daniel.
'He would peak,' said Lucy Potter.
'I'm innocent,' said Daniel, standing guiltily in the hallway, trying not to be too obvious in his gazing in at Gloryel in one of her traditional Spice Girl's outfits.
'Bro,' shouted out Valandriel. 'Your making a fool of us. Get back in here.'
Daniel came back to the kitchen, were Ambriel was concentrating on his cards, and Cherubim Daniel was looking confident. They were gambling the supply of honey roasted cashews. The winner got to eat them.
'I'll fold,' said Ambriel.
'What a wuss,' said Valandriel. 'I'll raise 1 nut.'
'You are a nut,' said Cherubim Daniel.
'I resent that statement. Make it two nuts,' said Valandriel.
'I'll fold,' said Daniel the Seraphim who was on his feet again back up the hallway.
'Give him a break,' said Cherubim Daniel. 'He hasn't seen Gloryel in ages. He misses her.'
'They had a fight,' said Ambriel. 'She wouldn't talk to him EVER again. She finally softened recently. Could be fireworks tonight.'
Daniel braved the room, and came down and sat on the bed.
'You look good,' he said to her.
She looked at him from the reflection in the mirror, as she was putting on her makeup, but said nothing.
'I mean, it's been a long time. Time moves on. Water under the bridge.'
'And your still fucking Melanie Chisholm,' said Gloryel. 'No one woman man yet.'
'That'll be Ariel in the end anyway,' he said, looking away.
'Mmm,' she replied. 'I suspect so.'
'I still love ya babe,' he said to her.
She stood, came over and stood in front of him. 'I know,' she said, and walked out the room.
He went back to the kitchen, and sat down a little dejectedly, but happy Gloryel was speaking to him again.
'She's forgive you?' asked Valandriel.
'Only somewhat I think,' replied Daniel.
'Well that's a start. Now lets play for nuts,' replied Valandriel, and they continued on with their poker game.
* * * * *
'I don't really want to talk about Sariel's endowment,' declined Gloryel.
'Yeh, I know its a pretty crude topic,' said Daniel the Seraphim. 'Conversation, you know.'
'The all-knowing Daniel the Seraphim has run out of conversation topics?' queried Gloryel.
'Don't believe it,' said Melanie. 'He might be winding you up. But he has softened these days.'
'I heard about that,' said Gloryel, sitting on the couch as the music played, in the front room of Danielphon. Ambriel and Victoria were dancing, and Cherubim Daniel was sipping on ginger beer, tapping his fingers, while Lucy had her Tarot cards and was giving Valandriel a reading.
'I've not changed at all,' prided Daniel. 'I am who I always have been. I think, though, a set of paradigms have run their course. Sarcastic frivolity mainly.'
'To entertain us all,' said Melanie knowingly, looking at Daniel.
'To entertain us,' said Daniel, and picked up a twiggy sausage from the tray on the coffee table.
'All Ambriel and Michael ever say is to be yourself anyway,' said Gloryel, sipping on a tonic water with vodka.
'True,' said Daniel. 'I suppose we can't escape being ourself anyway, though. Whatever we may scheme up, its our own way of expressing our own thoughts. Maybe we just mature in time, though. And maybe that is more of what people think we really are like.'
'Or what we were all along,' said Melanie. 'Just hiding it because of embarrassment of not being accepted by some.'
'People can be judgmental,' said Ambriel, interrupting. 'We can find it difficult to relax around a lot of harsher people.'
Daniel, Melanie and Gloryel seemed to all nod as one on that point.
'So is it still a six inch stonker when erect?' asked Daniel.
Melanie burst out laughing, but Gloryel just looked at Daniel disapprovingly. 'You're an idiot,' she said to him. He just grinned back.
* * * * *
It was late, and they were out the back of Danielphon, on the cricket pitch, in the darkness, lying on their backs, looking up at the stars. The rest were inside, in mild states of intoxication, but he and Melanie were on the cricket pitch, her head on his belly, looking up at the stars. You could actually see some of the distant stars circling the planetary bodies of humanity's section of the spiritual universe.
'If I could name a star for you, I would,' said Daniel, and hiccupped, full of butterscotch schnapz.
'Go on then. Name one for me,' said Melanie.
Daniel looked up. 'That one,' he said. 'Right up high, in the centre of the sky.'
'Fortunata,' replied Melanie. 'That's the Fortunata star system. It's all about good luck and fortune there.'
'I now name it Melanata,' replied Daniel.
Melanie sighed, and looked up.
Yeh, I know it sounds like a skin disease,' said Daniel momentarily. Melanie did not respond at this point. 'Or possibly a french coffee on the list nobody really wants to try.' Melanie nudged him on that one. 'Or a new age design company which makes decorations for kids playgrounds of esoteric concepts.'
'You know Daniel,' replied Melanie. 'Of all the people I have ever met in my long life as a Spice Girl of fame and an Angel Divine, you are definitely YOU. There is none quite like YOU.'
'Your all heart,' replied Daniel, burped, farted, and smiled. He felt good. The alcohol was feeling good. Melanie's head had shifted to a comfortable position on his crotch ironically.
'Mel. That's a good position. You don't want to turn over, do you?'
Melanie giggled. 'Dream on Seraphim Daniel,' she replied. 'Dream on.'
So he gazed at the stars, and they fell asleep, and while it was the morning sprinkler which woke him, he didn't mind, for it had been a very good night to remember.
Chapter Three
Daniel was again sitting out the front of Danielphon. Those parents walked by again, and the bratty kid was with them. They talked among themselves a bit, and the kid came up the pathway of Danielphon and gave Daniel a painting, said 'Sorry', and left. Daniel looked at the painting. It was of him as an angel with Melanie, and while it was early work, it was still quite good. The kid himself had done it by the looks of it. He took it inside and put it on the wall on the corkboard in the kitchen.
Melanie and Daniel were drinking beer on the couch, watching the A-Team.
'Nice picture. Who did it?' asked Melanie.
'Some kid who gives me the shits,' said Daniel. 'It was his way of apologizing.'
'He must be a fan.'
'I think his parents made him do it,' replied Daniel.
'We all learn like that,' said Melanie. 'Doing what our parents tell us to do. We're hardly bastions of wisdom otherwise.'
Daniel sipped on his beer, and watched the show. Time passed. The sky got a little darker, and Ariel came home after a busy day, noticed Melanie was STILL a house guest, and said she'd be with Francine next door if she was wanted.
'Who is Francince anyway?' Melanie asked Daniel. 'And how long has she been next door?'
'Francine Jones,' said Daniel. 'Bestie of Lucy Potter.'
'Oh,' replied Melanie. 'You know her?'
'Quite well. I think you've seen her around the traps over the years.'
'Probably,' said Melanie.
'She's a good friend of uncle Greg and Auntie Jacinta. She has always wanted to be in the heart of Eternity and has been saving her money forever to buy a place near someone she knew of. She chose me, as the place next door was leased for aeons, she made an offer, and they accepted.'
'Right,' said Melanie. 'Francine Jones. Is she cute?'
'Oh, she has her own charm,' said Daniel.
'I see,' said Melanie, and said nothing more.
The A-Team finished and they ordered chinese takeaway, and Daniel was in the kitchen doing the crossword of all things.
'Its one from puzzlebox,' said Daniel. 'Very challenging crosswords. Any legal language word can be used, and the clues are extremely cryptic. I think Archangel Gabriel owns the company.'
'Yes, Gab owns Puzzlebox,' said Melanie. 'They make puzzles in wooden and plastic boxes. Very challenging ones. I think I bought you one once.'
'Rings a faint bell,' said Daniel, and continued on with his puzzle. Melanie looked at him, in his white vest, pants, looking very calm and relaxed.
'Your like your grandfather Cyril,' she said to him.
He looked up at her. 'How so?'
'The Daly in you. Meek, in the end. Daly's. A quiet people. Chisholm's have their own qaulities, and all the families do. I know what Daly's are made of, though. They calm down in the end, as well, the excitable ones.'
'I've been conquered, then,' said Daniel, and smiled at her, returning to his crossword. She looked at him. She looked at this angel she was all too fond of, and thought to herself, time has conquered, in the end, Daniel the Seraphim. Only Time. And she thought that the greatest irony of all, as she returned to the lounge, finished off the chinese, and another fine day passed in Danielphon Keep, in the city of Zaphona, in the Disc of Zaphora, in the Realm of Eternity, in the eternal and true Kingdom of God.
* * * * *
'My name is Daniel Daly,' said the angel to the busy shopfront worker.
'Place of residence?' asked the counterman.
'Danielphon,' replied Daniel.
'Where is that? I don't have time for bullshit today.'
Daniel almost swore. 'Just process the damn license,' he snarled.
'Have a nice day,' replied the man, and handed him his new Zaphona city driver license. Michael, every current citizen of Zaphona agreed, was an asshole. Licence renewals, garbage truck renewal forms, rates renewals, every damn permit under creation required to be renewed now for residence in Zaphona city. The central disc overseer was having a fucking go. Absolute asshole.
He walked into Danielphon, collapsed on the lounge, and tried turning on the TV. Nothing happened.
'We need a license now,' said Melanie, coming in the room. 'To use a TV in Zaphona.'
Daniel's jaw actually did drop open – Melanie wished she had her iphone with her to get a shot.
'He's a cunt,' said Daniel, and put on a DVD. 'He was born a cunt, he'll live a cunt, and if I have my way he'll die a cunt. A dead cunt. Satan was not this obnoxious.'
'Cheer up. There's worse. The new rates bill is for a Billion years in advance to be considered a 'True' and 'Loyal' citizen of Zaphona. And its a whopper of a figure.'
Daniel glared at her, and turned towards the TV. 'Use my card in the desk. It has enough.'
'Are you sure?' she asked.
'It HAS enough,' he replied.
Later on she confirmed the payment went through, and when he checked it online he sighed. It was quite high actually. He'd been thinking it over. Michael was in a powerplay mood. Using his Aces these days. Doing what a realm disc overseer could do and get away with legally. He had a trump card. He was Arch Regent of the Realm. It could be an interesting power struggle. He didn't want one at the moment – probably why he was getting one. He'd pacified recently. Calmed down a lot. Got back to his true angelic self according to Melanie. Would he rise to this fight? The Daniel in him said yes. But the Daly in him said 'bide your time, idiot. Let him play his cards, and get around to what you need to do.' This time he listened to the Daly.
'We're eating next door tonight,' he said. 'With Ariel and Francine. Francine invited us. We'll chat about the new agenda.'
Melanie smiled, and took off her oven mits, looked at the baked chicken in the oven, which she was about to serve up, and sighed. 'Oh well. Lunch sandwiches for a few days.'
Chapter Four
'Is the job to be as an obnoxious bastard as possible?' Gabriel asked Michael.
'Sorry. Can't comply. Daniel already has that job taken,' responded Michael from the Overseers desk of Zaphona City, not the Realm overseer, but the central disc overseer. 'Ooh, I got a treasure map,' said Michael. Michael was playing Wrath of Pharaoh Tutunkhamun 97, the latest in the saga of Egyptian adventure RPGs.
'Why are you being such a prick about things?' asked Gabriel. 'I've had complaints at Terraphon all day long these days. Why is Michael being a wanker in Zaphona? They have all sorts of problems needing travel permits and taxes to pay, and business trade is a disaster.'
'Listen, Gab. I have countless pissed off Israelis stuck down in Zionistya, and believe me the weather is pretty shitty down below. Never stops raining. I have slipped back into this job because nobody challenged me, so I'm going to bear my fricking grudge against Daniel and co as best I can buddy.'
'Farbeit from Michael the Seraphim to exude some grace I take it,' replied Gabriel. 'Your firstborn Michael. How about acting like it.'
'The treasure map is in Latin. I know Latin. I'll take this quest,' said Michael, typing away at the PC.
'Torah forbids grudges. Israel's Torah anyway,' suggested Gabriel, thinking how to get to his brother.
'The Torah can go oof,' replied Michael. 'I shan't be judged by master Moshe these days. I shall contemplate my own divine truths.'
'Part of keeping the faith is actually keeping the faith,' countered Gabriel.
Michael turned to look at Gabriel. 'There's a Catholic cathedral just down the road a little. Send my regards to the reverend.'
Gabriel just shook his head, frustrated at Michael's current insolence, but decided to leave it at that for the moment. He'd registered his concerns. Michael, he assumed, would get over it soon enough. He hoped.
* * * * *
'How about being the bigger man about it,' said Melanie. 'I know you've changed a lot in recent times. Michael has always had to be perfect. Why don't you try doing that for a while? Let Michael have his fun. He'll get over it.'
Daniel sighed. 'Do we have any mayonaisse? I can't find it anywhere. This chicken would be great on a roll with mayo.'
'It's in the cupboard,' said Melanie. 'Personally I think condiments, apart from butter usually, are better off in the pantry. Room temperature makes them pour more easily.'
'That is actually true, Mel. People like the hygiene of the fridge, but I think I might agree with you. Ariel must refrigerate the stuff though. Health concerns. Doesn't let me eat much junk usually.'
Melanie looked at Daniel's belly which had been getting a little bigger in recent times. 'I see why she's your twin, I guess. Knows how to keep you under control.'
'That she does, babe,' replied Daniel. 'Yeh, ok. I'll go with the flow of Mikey Dkyes BS for the moment. Let him dig his own grave.'
'You do that,' said Melanie. 'The situation will resolve itself soon enough I would imagine.'
'Do we have any more cola?' asked Daniel.
'Cupboard again,' said Melanie. 'I prefer it at room temperature.'
'For fricks sa...,' but he trailed off seeing Melanie concern on her face with the language she was expecting, and said nothing more, but got the cola from the pantry, and headed to the lounge.
He clicked on the TV, and tuned in BBC International News.
'…......and so the tax rate for high income earners in Zaphona City in the upper bracket of earnings will increase from 33%, which has been the rate for aeons, to 51%. Effective immediately as per Seraphim Michael's official tax reform package.'
Daniel looked at the TV for a moment, then flicked it off with the remote, and grumbled quietly.
'It's not too big a rise,' said Melanie. 'You can afford it.'
'Ok. I'll be the bigger man,' said Daniel softly.
'Good,' she said.
The afternoon was quiet, as Daniel sat reading 'Pawn of Prophecy' by David Eddings, and Melanie doing some knitting of a jumper. Daniel had read the book countless times before, but that was what you did with your eternity in the end. The same old same old, routines which worked, which he and Valandriel had discussed and worked out a long time ago. Spice it up occasionally and be a bit spontaneous, but usually life affirming and happy routines.
'Ask him if there is anything you can do for him. Ask politely,' said Melanie.
'Huh?' asked Daniel.
'Ask Michael politely if there is anything you can do for him.'
'And why on Earth would I do that?' asked Daniel.
'Trust me,' she replied. 'A woman knows these things.'
He looked at her puzzled, shrugged, and returned to his book. 'Ok,' he said momentarily. 'I'll ask.'
'Good,' she replied, and left the room, leaving Daniel thinking about what he wanted to say to Michael, but then agreeing to do it Melanie's way. For the moment anyway. For the moment.
Chapter Five
'Yeh. Sewerage worker for Zaphon tower. I need a temp for about a year. A bloke on holiday,' said Michael. 'It's normally handled internally by Zaphon Tower management, but I was at a meeting recently, and said I'd fill the job with someone if they didn't mind.'
Daniel looked squarely at Michael. 'Does it involve shit?'
'Quite a bit,' replied Michael, equally as squarely.
Daniel looked down, grumbled that grumble again, and looked up smiling. 'Sure, older brother. I'll do that job for you. Oh, and one other thing. Can we meet for drinks in the upstairs bar later this evening. Ronnie Dio I am sure will be in fine form on the piano, and Cheryl promises a good evening after midnight. We can have a few drinks and chat. Catch up on things.'
Michael looked at Daniel, and tried to sense the motivation. 'Sure than Dan. We can do that.'
'See you then,' replied Daniel, and left.
Later, when Michael had finished for the day, he retired to his overseer office and picked up the phone to ring Elenniel at her own oveseers office on her own disc.
'Hey babe. How was your day?' he asked her.
'Difficult. But life is challenging, and angels must respond eternally to that challenge serving our great God.'
'That we must,' replied Michael. 'I'm having late drinks with Daniel after midnight.'
'Be nice,' said Elenniel.
'Am I ever anything but,' replied Michael.
'I know the other side of you,' she said. 'You can have a streak at times, even you. Be kind.'
'Will do.'
* * * * *
'So you belong in Zionistya. If you see my logic,' said Daniel. 'It's chalk and cheese in the end. Circumcision is too challenging to unify on. There is always disagreements of policy. It doesn't work well.'
'Mm,' said Michael. 'Well I don't know if I care if it works well or not. We'll reclaim our position up here one way or another. There is nothing legal to prevent us. It was just the will of the people to kick us out for a while.'
'Wisdom would listen to the will of the people,' said Daniel.
'Wisdom often has two sides to a story,' replied Michael. 'And a lot of Israelis and Abrahamides will be migrating upwards soon enough.'
'Then you'll learn again the hard way,' said Daniel and sighed.
'That we will do,' finished Michael.
They sipped on their drinks and listened as Cheryl sang 'Holy Diver' in a jazzy way, Ronnie excellent on the keyboards tonight.
'You could try getting along better,' said Daniel. 'And not being such a separatist cult. You guys exclude everyone from your assemblies, and then expect to live in our same world. It's a frikking joke dude.'
Michael did not respond, but sipped on his wine.
'If that is the way you want it, then that is what you will do I guess,' said Daniel. 'We can't change you into something you are unwilling to be. But it pisses people off. I don't think you guys get that bit in your wisdom. You just do what you want and expect to be accepted on it, and be esteemed as something wise. But you don't see the attitude you give everyone. And you think you guys are cool in being like that. Really, it just sucks.'
Michael looked at Daniel for a moment, but let the moment go, and went back to himself.
'Yeh, I suppose that is why Hitler hated your guts. Always an attitude problem.
'Hitler was evil,' replied Michael.
'He was also fricking honest,' replied Daniel.
'So you say,' replied Michael.
Daniel sighed again. 'Ok. When do I start?'
Michael's eyes lit up. 'Next week. I'll introduce you to your supervisor.'
'Sounds great,' said Daniel.
'I'm sure you'll get a kick out of serving Zaphona City. We do appreciate it,' grinned Michael.
'I'll bet,' said Daniel. And they sipped on wine, and enjoyed a little more night music.
* * * * *
The year came, the year went, Daniel did his job, fulfilled his contract, and showed up at Michael's desk.
'Ok boss. Tax rate is 33%. No more permit and tax and license fees bullshit. Back to standard prices, or I pull rank buster,' said the 45th Seraphim.
Michael grinned. 'Fine. Ok. I'll return to standard practices.'
Daniel nodded, and as he left he heard the little snigger and 'I hoped you enjoyed the shit.' He refrained from commenting.
At home Ariel was around, with no Melanie in sight.
'Ok. Time is up,' said Ariel.
Daniel looked at her. 'Yep. Good. That's good.'
'Calendar, buster.'
He looked at the calendar. 'Oh, yeah. New year. Hey, look at all the zeroes.'
'Notice the aeon number,' said Ariel.
Daniel looked. 'Fancy that. We've reached the next level. But time inevitably moves on. Good time for reflection.'
'And an oath made in Jindabyne a long time ago,' replied Ariel.
Daniel looked at her, then looked more concentratedly at her. 'That was a LONG time ago Ariel.'
'You swore,' she said.
'Yes,' he said sombrely. 'I did.'
Later that evening, Ariel was next door, and Melanie came in.
'Ok, Mel. Well I'm getting married.'
Melanie looked surprised. 'Who to? I thought you were over that?'
'Eternally. To Ariel. A certain oath was made for a certain aeon. Unless other circumstances determined otherwise, which they haven't babe, then I'm hers forever.'
'Oh, uh,' said the Spice Girl. 'What, you want me to frikking leave?'
'Come back in 5 years for a holiday. And we'll conclude our romance. It's plutonic after that babe.'
'Oh,' said Melanie. There was a gleam in her eye. Daniel noticed it.
'I had the commit to Ariel. You would have had to have the commit to me which superseded it. There was discussion on what qualified. It didn't eventuate.'
'Oh,' said Melanie. She sat down. She sat there, and Daniel went into the kitchen. She looked around Danielphon, and thought on her memories. He'd been a love of her life. What she'd thought would be an eternal love of her life. But not now. Not anymore. Melanie and Daniel were never meant to be again.
She packed her bags, left a note, and had written see you in five. When Daniel found it he made a note, and placed it on his PC. Last drinks with Mel in 5. Don't forget. He cried for a while that night. In the morning he felt better, and Ariel came around and made them breakfast, and he knew he'd cope in the end. Life went on, in the end, anyway. Life went on.
THE END

Devuel and Luladiel
'Lara's gone, babe,' said Devuel.
Luladiel nodded. 'We're far from compatible.'
'You and Daniel have drifted apart,' said Devuel. 'You don't even stay there anymore. It's only him and Taylor.'
'He loves her more,' said Katy.
'Then how about it?'
Luladiel spoke with Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly the Cherubim at length a few weeks later.
'You're not going to end up with your twin. That much is obvious. Most of the Cherubim don't care for that idea,' said Luladiel.
'Too much grief with her mother, and I only like her somewhat,' replied Daniel. 'But, yes. We've drifted a little. The heart tunes in to where it belongs eventually.'
'Then we'll separate and divorce?' asked Katy.
They did so.
Devuel and Luladiel were in Saruviel's office in Kalphon.
'You always were the devil's own,' said Daraqel, looking at the golf ball Kantriel was about to putt.
'I mean, give me a break,' said Kantriel. 'Daly was only a fascination because he liked you so much for a while.'
'We're not marrying,' said Katy to the office. 'Me and Devuel. I'm over those ideas. They were youth and innocence, and I'm not that anymore. I don't think I ever will be again.'
'Then fornicate your asses off,' said Saruviel, and took the golf putter and putted the ball perfectly into the cup.
Luladiel looked at Devuel on the couch. 'Your too much of a liar for me to ever trust you anyway. At least this way it's more honest about the situation.'
'And I love you too babe,' replied Devuel, and picked up the copy of the Playboy magazine which had been in Saruviel's office for many a fine aeon.
'Pretty much sums it up,' remarked Luladiel, and sighed. Of course, she could always go off and kiss a girl. Yeh, she should do that. She really should. And maybe a lot more besides.
The End

David and Gemma
Gemma smiled. David had proposed at last. Justine was finally settled with her old husband out on a planetary body, and the fascination with Ms Atkinson was complete. And then he'd said to her Meludiel was content with Jacob Fink, so he was high and dry, and needed love in his life.
'Zionistya is great,' said Ambriel. 'Let's live there.'
'I can do that,' said Gemma.
'We'll start a family,' said David.
'I can do that,' said Gemma.
David smiled.
They went out that evening, and she was dressed in a business suit, as she was a competent lawyer, and they chatted legal subjects pertaining to Zionistya. Ambriel was thinking of Meludiel, and the look in her eye when she said she was a Christian, and that her and Jacob Fink was a settled issue. And he almost wept, but then he remembered Gemma, and realized, in his dumbass masculine pride, she was the spunk he'd wanted most in the end anyway. And now she was brilliant. She was sophisticated, smart, very good looking, and very sexy. And he didn't really want anyone else much right at the moment. And he sensed him then, the Most High looking into his heart, and seemingly satisfied that a resolution of things had occurred well enough. And he decided he wouldn't challenge that resolution, and let sleeping dogs lie, and eternity would be Gemma Watkins and David Rothchild, and David Rothchild and Gemma Watkins would be eternity. And love had walked in, stayed, and he was finally a married man to be, and a committed one, and that would do.
'Can I have my mother move in with me for a while?' asked Gemma. 'She's having difficulties with dad at the moment.'
David sighed. 'Sure thing,' he said. 'Anything for you babe.'
'Oh, and toilet seat down always. Don't forget.'
He sighed again, knowing the list was coming of rules, but could he really have it any other way? Probably not, he thought to himself, as the bill arrived, and Gemma ignored it, leaving David to take out his credit card. He looked at the price of the bill. Yep, he was definitely marrying Gemma Watkins. So he sighed once more, and they went out to the car, and she asked him to pull to the side of the road on their way home, and as she gave him head, he knew he wouldn't have it any other way. Well how could you, duh?
The End

The End 2
'Ok. I've decided,' said Ariel. 'I've agreed to this eternal marriage in a few weeks, but no. I've cold feet. It's my man in Minnesota. Mike Morris. I just can't stay loyal to you Daniel forever, so I'm going off to be with him. End of discussion. Here is your ring.'
'Thanks babe,' said Daniel. 'Appreciated. I didn't want to commit anyway. You know me to well. I'll ring Melanie tonight.'
Melanie told him to fuck himself some more, and Daniel sighed. 'Oh well. Porn and wanking I suppose. I'll check out the red light district tonight then.'
* * * * *
Callodyn finally sighed. 'Ok babe. You prefer Blackstock, don't you?'
Kayella sighed. 'Aye, you idiot.'
'Seeya babe. I left the divorce papers on the desk. I'll collect my stuff next week.'
And Callodyn was gone, and Kayella and Callodyn were finished forever, or so it seemed.
* * * * *
'Ok, Tails. We'll divorce now,' said Cherubim Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly. 'Give it at least a year or so, and if you do actually like me, give me a call, and I'll commit forever. But if not, your free babe.'
'I'll think on it,' said Taylor Swift.
* * * * *
Cherubim Daniel Thomas Andrew Daly, Cherubim Callodyn and Seraphim were at a certain 29 Merriman crescent, drinking beer, and playing Axis and Allies.
'Women. Way to fussy,' said Daniel.
'Aye,' agreed Daniel.
'But they are nice to fuck,' said Callodyn.
And then the Tom Foolery began, and it didn't stop all night.
The End

Callodyn and Kayella 18
Callodyn was farting irregularly.
'It's all the prostitutes you are bedding,' said Daniel the Seraphim. 'They have you in an uncharacteristic slovenliness of decadence. Well, maybe that not uncharacteristic. I know you well bro.'
'Decadence is the true wisdom of life,' replied Callodyn, and farted again.
'Twice in the last five minutes,' said Daniel.
'I need a steady woman, otherwise hedonism rises up and conquereth mine soul,' replied Callodyn.
'Ye have not yet learned the discipline of the way of the holy bastard,' said Daniel.
Callodyn looked at Daniel. 'The way of the holy bastard?'
'We do not ever tremble at the presence of mighty femmedom. They are our servants and dutiful worshippers eternity forever.'
'It is not a principle I have mediated heavily upon,' replied Callodyn.
'Quite apparently not,' sighed Daniel. 'I know, it is true. Only so many of us have the discipline to resist proud Eve's vile charms. She spreadeth her legs, doth the woman, and expects us to desire her with carnal and wanton lust. I shall not be conquered by such deceptions.'
'pornhub dot com, is it then?' asked Callodyn.
'porn dot com, actually,' replied Daniel. 'But pornhub is good too.'
'I am not so certain of my own masculine invincibility,' replied Callodyn. 'I miss Kay. She didn't object too much to my farting.'
'Well accustomed to your vile gastronomic concoctions, is she?' queried Daniel.
'Something like that,' replied Callodyn.

Callodyn was sitting around Danielphon, where they had returned to, and was feeling sorry for himself. He missed his twin. But Mr Blackstock was her true devotion. He would, it seems, have to rely on plutonic realities. But he still, never the less, needed those plutonic realities.
He rang her up.
'Hi babe,' said Callodyn.
'Don't call me babe, freak,' replied Kayella.
'I miss you,' said Callodyn.
'Enjoy the solitary life,' replied Kayella, and hung up. Callodyn sighed again.

'Of course, you could go on to Russian Bitch Brides dot com,' suggested Daniel later that week.
'They're bitches,' said Callodyn. 'Screw you over for cash and divorce you after a decade.'
'Who cares,' replied Daniel. 'You won't fart as much. Be pragmatic bro. Live in the real world. Give her what she wants, and she'll give you what you want, and when it ends just let it be.'

Callodyn signed up, a Russian lady from Radrukiel's disc showed up after a while, and he got laid more regularly after the 'devoted' marriage.
He got a call from Kayella.
'Nice to see you are as shallow as ever,' said Kayella.
'You know me, Kay,' replied Callodyn.
'I'm very glad I am married to a faithful man, and not caught up with the likes of you,' said Kayella.
'She gives head better than you,' replied Callodyn.
Silence.
'Go fuck yourself,' said Kayella, and hung up.

'Of course, you could always marry a second wench,' said Daniel. 'Chinese babes for western men. That's a great site,' said Daniel.
Callodyn went through the routine. The chinese chick was good at various things as well.

Phone call again.
'She has big tits as well,' said Daniel. 'A real Chinese beauty.'
'Suits your ego I suppose,' replied Kayella.
'We dine at the restaurant you and I used to go to in Zaphona city. She's quite popular with people. Quite a stunner.
Silence.
'Go fuck yourself,' said Kayella, and hung up.

'Of course, nothing is like the loyalty of your twin if she gives a shit about you,' said Daniel.
Callodyn divorced the Russian and Chinese ladies a few months later, with a hefty settlement.

Kayella rang him up.
'I'll drop around, but only for a few weeks. I like my husband. But I do love my twin. I'll see you soon enough.'
Callodyn felt better.
Platonic would have to suffice for now.
The End

Zelzazon and the Death of an Ancient Evil III
Zarbalax and Zelzazon were having an argument.
'Quantifying the relationship between 'Death Serum XVI' and its genocidal potential versus the unceasing hostility of the prayers of Ambriel the Messiah to redeem Israel is challenging,' said Zelzazon.
'I disagree,' replied Zarbalax. 'I measured the amount of evil matter in the death serum carefully and am confident the relationship is clear. As good as Ambriel is, the boiled blood of Satan mixed with the faeces of Hitler and the sperm of Antiochus Epiphanes IV shall surely reduce Israel to dust and ashes. Undoubtedly.'
Zelzazon considered that. 'Love is a strange beast,' replied the professor of misfortune.
'Bah, nonsense,' retorted Zarbalax. 'The stuff of tooth fairies and Easter bunnies. My new plan is diabolically brilliant, majestically evil.'
'We shall see,' finished Zelzazon, staring intently at the test tube in his hidden laboratory, filled with the most vile and disgusting substances of said paragons of darkness.
The End

The End 3
'Well, all good things must come to an end,' said Daniel the Seraphim.
'Aye,' replied Valandriel.
'ValDan is finished,' said Daniel. 'We've met our objectives, conquered all and sundry, and achieved the glory of glories.'
'That we have,' replied Valandriel.
'Michael has gone home to Zionistya, sick to death of the hassling for his kind in the Realm, and that is the status quo eternal by the looks of it,' said Daniel.
'I'd say so,' replied Valandriel.
'So we enjoy the fruits of our labours, now, indulge in a few things, and life goes on.'
'I couldn't have said it any better myself, kemosabe,' replied Valandriel. 'I couldn't have said it any better myself.'
And a Chronicle ended, and life went on, and that was that. The End. Goodbye.

Rebirth III
'You're pretty crap at archery,' Valandriel said to Daniel.
Daniel turned and stared at Valandriel for a moment, and then turned again to face the target at a distance of 100 metres with his longbow.
'Are you crap at archery?' Meludiel asked Daniel. She was standing next to Jacob Fink, her husband.
'I'm as good as your elite athlete there,' said Daniel, referring to Jacob.
Jacob looked at the target in the distance. 'I could probably hit the target,' he said.
Daniel put down his bow. 'Go ahead,' he said.
Jacob borrowed Daniel's bow and arrow, lifted it and weighed it for a moment, then took aim and fired. The arrow hit the target on an outer circle.
'Good shot Cubbie,' said Daniel. 'My turn.' Daniel took aim, fired, and hit the hay which was supporting the target, about a metre further out from where Jacob's had landed.
'Not too shabby, Danny boy,' said Valandriel. 'Surprised you got it that close.'
Daniel was quite pleased with himself. He was no Xaddadaxx yet.
'Your man is obviously a better trained athlete at many things than myself,' he said to Meludiel.
'You can probably take me at cricket,' said Jacob. 'I've watched you a bit. You have natural determination at the game, if not a great deal of talent. You work hard with what you have got.'
'Unfortunately true,' said Valandriel. 'He was hopeless to start with. Very basic batting, but a bit of talent at medium pace. When he pushed hard he had a little bit, and it took aeons to get him up to a good level. Bradman once said he had a distinctive batting style.'
'Is that right?' queried Jacob. 'From pushing yourself?'
'Yeh, it's a natural passion,' said Daniel somewhat humbly. 'Something we are supposed to work on these days. A lot of focus now on improvement and working to an elite level.'
'Shouldn't the ValDan agenda try and work at an elite level?' asked Meludiel. 'You could do much better with your charity work for example.'
Daniel and Valandriel both looked at Meludiel.
'Ok. We'll see you back at the clubhouse,' said Valandriel, and he wandered off with Daniel.
'He gets more blessing because he has more concern,' said Valandriel to Daniel, as they sat under the shade of a pine tree at the Terraphora Activities centre.
'Yep. God blesses those who are generous. It's not our natural thing much,' replied Daniel.
'Apparently we have to work at that idea also. To improve at being more charitable.'
'Painful,' replied Daniel. He looked towards the clubhouse, where Rebecca and Jacob were, and acknowledged that.
'But I think I'll let my heart grow more naturally on those things in time, with experience,' said Daniel.
'Ok. I'll agree,' said Valandriel. 'We have enough glory. We'll let the rest happen naturally with time.'
They sat there, and watched the clouds drift by, and sipped on their bottles of coca cola, and gradually made their way to the clubhouse. Daniel would think upon what had been said, though. He would take it to heart.
The End

Down in the Dumps
'Rather pathetic,' said Ariel. 'Look at you. The belly is a fat old dragon's, and the beard is longer than Moses in his heyday. You're hardly an angel Daniel the Seraphim. I came looking for an angel – and I found a slob.'
'Burn in hell,' replied Daniel from the couch, and reached for the pack of Tim Tams. 'I don't give a damn. Nobody loves me. I'm on my own. My twin has told me to fuck off forever, and I can't function without her.'
Ariel looked at him. 'Well I'm here now, idiot. Get off your arse and clean up this mess.'
Daniel looked at her through lazy eyes, and sighed. 'Do I have to babe? Can't you do it?'
'Don't call me babe,' she replied, and went to the bookcase. She picked out a volume of a Haven tome, and started reading. 'Cleanliness is next to Godliness, it has been said. Yet the lazy man exalts himself over God, prides in his own wisdom, yet descends into uncleanness, surrounded by the fruits of his own pride.'
'Shaddup,' replied Daniel.
'Judged by your own assembly,' said Ariel.
'A heretic wrote that,' replied Daniel.
Ariel looked at the cover. 'Written by Callodyn the Cherubim.'
'I rest my case,' replied Daniel. 'Can't you clean up? I'll pay you babe.'
'Truly pathetic,' said Ariel, as she started cleaning up Danielphon. Five hours later the abode was moderately presentable, and she was cutting Daniel's hair and shaving him.
'You need a wife,' she said to him.
'Available?' he asked her.
'Go out on a date. I know you like to marry virgins, and I know a few in Terraphora. I can get you a date, but you have to promise me to put in a better effort.'
'Just keep on shaving bitch,' replied Daniel, then smiled at her apologetically.
'Being down in the dumps is natural enough,' said Ariel. 'You don't have much motivation left these days. But life goes on, so toughen up soldier.'
'Yes boss,' he said saluting her.
'And get a shower. You stink,' she said firmly.
Later on Daniel had showered and was sitting on the couch, feeling clean. He'd been inspired in the shower, and rang Valandriel on his mobile.
'Valley Boy. Let's go off to an outer disc and do some charity work for Haven. We're supposed to care as angels.'
'I'll be at Danielphon next week,' replied Valandriel, and hung up.
Daniel lied back, and reached for the Tim Tams, turning on the TV. He'd give charity work a go. Meludiel liked the idea. Maybe in that new work he would find his current salvation. Maybe.
* * * * *
But Daniel, being Daniel, did charity for three weeks, and sauntered back to Danielphon, sat down on the couch, opened a new pack of Tim Tams, and started watching TV again. He ordered pizza and soft drink, and burped after 3 pieces of pizza, enjoying himself. Meludiel walked in.
'Rather pathetic,' said Meludiel. 'Look at that belly. A big old fat wyvvern you are.'
'Gee, thanks,' replied Daniel. 'Come to judge me have you? Judge not lest ye be judged. You'll slacken off one day. I have – foreseen it.'
She just shook her head, and looked around the room. 'Rather hopeless, isn't he?'
Jacob Fink walked into view. 'Daniel was always a lukewarm Christian his old priest tells me. And his pentecostal pastors said he had the right attitude, but was just way to erratic in how he performed.'
'Crazy schizophrenic,' said Meludiel, shaking her head at Daniel.
'So you two want to set a good example for me and give this place a spring cleaning? Good servants of Christ Jesus?'
'So you've finally acknowledged his Christhood have you?' asked Rebecca.
'He is considered of the family of Christ, being descended from Zerubbabel,' replied Daniel. 'He gained a following amongst Israel, so has status as a King or Prince of sorts of Israel of his generation, such being the devotion which arose historically after time towards him.'
'Does that make him Christ then?' asked Jacob, helping Rebecca clean up some of the mess.
'Not really,' replied Daniel. 'It is true that very many of his supposed fulfilments of messianic passages are sections which really have nothing to do with a messiah. But, conversely, a messiah should follow the pattern of the scriptures, so doing scriptural things and follow motifs of the Tanakh are the kind of things which a Messiah figure does, and being descended from Zerubbabel, and of the house of Christ, he walked in a Christ like way for his own generation and ideology. He created new teaching, from his studies of Torah, which is inspiration. I do think, personally, Israel shot themselves in the foot when they closed the canon of the Tanakh. I doubt it was God's will to finish official scripture. They just decided to do it.'
'So Jesus teaching is house of Christ Scripture, is it then?' asked Jacob.
Daniel looked at him. 'Scripture? Ok, fine. The church didn't have a problem with having more scripture. Fine then. It's house of Christ Scripture. I can accept that much. But they closed their canon with 27 books, and finished it too soon like Israel also.'
'It works well enough,' replied Meludiel.
'I suppose,' said Daniel.
'What are your scriptures then?' asked Jacob.
'You don't know?' asked Daniel.
'I've never taken an interest in Noahidism. I leave other religious teachings to their own community for their own knowledge and spirituality,' replied Jacob.
'We have lots of Scripture in the ANM,' replied Daniel. 'Lots of it.'
'I see,' said Jacob.
'Well you obviously don't have much which teaches you good housekeeping,' said Meludiel. 'Just look at this dump.'
'I'm lazy,' replied Daniel, lying back on the couch.
'One of the seven deadly sins,' said Rebecca.
'Ooh, I'm cut to the core,' mocked Daniel in response.
'So you should be,' replied Rebecca.
Eventually Daniel helped them clean up, and they left, and Daniel looked around the flat. It was late at night now, and he was sleepy. The morning would be a new day, and he was sort of looking for something to do now, as ValDan had mostly achieved its objectives. Daniel the Seraphim had to find a new mission in life. He needed a brand new agenda.
* * * * *
But new agendas sucked. He was back on the couch. Eating Tim Tams. Getting fatter if anything. Melanie walked in.
'Truly pathetic,' said Melanie, grinning.
'Shaddup,' replied Daniel.
'I'd heard rumours. I prayed to Almighty God that those rumours were not true. He has not answered my prayer request,' she said strictly.
'I'm down in the dumps, ok,' replied Daniel. 'Leave me alone,' and he turned over and faced the back of the couch.
She sat down next to him. 'I'll stay for a few weeks,' she said.
He turned over and looked at her. 'Promise?' he asked her.
'I promise,' she said smiling.
'You'll do the dishes and clean Danielphon?' he asked her, eyes wide open.
'Daniel. There are legends as old as time about you. This chapter will be a new one, I assure you.'
'We'll go out tonight,' he said, lifting himself up.
'Are you sure you can manage it? You can still get around, can't you. I bet you haven't exercised in a year.'
'Two, actually,' he replied. 'But who's counting.'
'I'm putting you on a diet,' said Melanie. 'And an exercise regime.'
'Oh, bother,' replied Daniel.
'And don't let me catch you eating any more of these,' she said, snatching away the Tim Tams from his grasp.
'You have my word,' he said, saluting. She went away to hide the Tim Tams in the kitchen, and Daniel reached under the couch and pulled out a hidden pack, which he kept from her view.
'Ah, life's good,' said Daniel the Seraphim, picked up the remote, flicked to the A Team, and whiled away the afternoon with a suspicious Melanie C eyeing him carefully every time she came into the room, as he did his best to hide the evidence of his fierce and tenacious chocolate addiction.
The End