On clue x 4s and a toast (long)
Laura Packer 5-2027
Laura looks around to see if anyone is listening. A near by Patron kindly
lends an ear (I promise to give it back when I'm done. I'll even make
the sutures tidy) and anyone else might overhear.
"This isn't anything urgent, just an interesting revelation I thought I'd
share with you. Maybe it will strike someone else as it did me.
"So, for the last, oh, six or eight months, I've been finding myself in an
uncomfortable emotional state. My life is going pretty well, I'm
moderately content and happy, but I keep finding that I've been crying
really easily over stupid things, ("isn't that commercial meaningful..."
sniff) and, more disturbingly, finding myself angry at my parents alot for
no apparent reason.
"Without going into my whole history (details upon request) suffice it to
say that things between me and my parents are hundreds of times better
than they were when I was growing up, largely because I decided that
someone needed to be an adult in the relationship, and that someone was
me. For about ten years we have been alright with each other. I have
learned to walk away when the fights start, and they have learned that I
*will* leave if they don't stop.
"But lately I've been finding myself dredging up all sorts of old hurts
and painful memories. Things that happened 15-20 years ago, and are best
left buried.
"I've been disturbed by this.
"I was talking with a friend Monday night, and I mentioned this to her.
She commented that sometimes, if she is happy, contented, and (most
importantly) feels safe, she finds herself dredging up old garbage. She
thinks it is her subconscious saying, 'Alright girl, you can deal with
this now, and you will be alright to get through it.'
"I was hit with a clue x 4. Sometimes something makes so much sense that
I just have to believe it..."
Here Laura pauses, sips her tea, then says, "I do feel safe in my life
now. And the things I'm feeling angry about are valid angry things. So it
makes sense to me (and feels right) that now I finally can clean out some
of those old hurts, and finally let them heal."
She takes her now empty tea cup in hand, and walks to the chalk line.
Laura looks down for a long while, and then says, "To memories, and to
time, and to the patience to let one hide the other until it's time to
let go."
<<<CRASH>>>
As the cup shatters it sounds like a young girl's laughter.
Laura
storyteller, folklorist, dreamer
Saoba
>She takes her now empty tea cup in hand, and walks to the chalk line.
>Laura looks down for a long while, and then says, "To memories, and to
>time, and to the patience to let one hide the other until it's time to
>let go."
"Yup. BTDT," says BarbaraFox.
" For me, the defining moment of 3 years of therapy
came when I finally let myself be *ANGRY*."
"There I am striding up and down the office, getting
good and mad. My family does NOT do mad. Ever.
Those of you with semi-functional families cannot
begin to believe how crippling this can be. I turned
it all in and let it fester until I was admitted for a 48
hour suicide watch."
"So, I'm stomping up and down, getting madder
and madder. And my therapist is sort of crooning to
himself 'Wait for it, wait for it..."
"*Boom* It hits me. They'd lied to me. All those
dire predictions about how horrible and dangerous
anger was, how ever expressing it would cause the
end of civilization as we know it. A lie told by sad
frightened people to maintain their own comfort zones.
I shrieked, turned to my therapist and asked why it
had taken me 30+ years to catch on."
"He gave me a huge grin and said, basically, we
know what we are ready to know, when we are strong
enough to know it. 'Now we can really start to work.'
And that was what we did. "
"It was an amazing moment. It was when I began
to decide who I am, rather than being who I was told
to be. So, it took me 30+ years...."
She tosses her glass toward the fireplace.
"Call me a late bloomer."
***CRASH***
"...for there is hope in two women, help in three women, strength in
four, joy in five, power in six and against seven, no gate may stand."
Sheri S. Tepper "Gibbon's Decline and Fall"
Llbishop
In article <Pine.SUN.3.91.971224144344.8877B-100000@gauss>, Laura Packer 5-2027
<nhlsp@gauss> writes:
(gentle snip)
>Here Laura pauses, sips her tea, then says, "I do feel safe in my life
now.
>And the things I'm feeling angry about are valid angry things. So it
makes
>sense to me (and feels right) that now I finally can clean out some
of those
>old hurts, and finally let them heal."
She takes her now empty tea cup in
>hand, and walks to the chalk line.
Laura looks down for a long while, and
>then says, "To memories, and to
time, and to the patience to let one hide
>the other until it's time to
let go."
<<<CRASH>>>
As the cup shatters it
>sounds like a young girl's laughter.
Laura
storyteller, folklorist,
>dreamer
Nita has listened raptly to Laura. A few tears gather in her eyes, and roll,
unnoticed, down her cheeks. She starts to speak, grumphs, and starts again,
"To healing the hurts," and sends her glass after Laura's.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>crash<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
Nita, an RPSGT
_________________________________
Prove all things;
Hold fast that which is good.
I Thessalonians 5:21
Ben
Laura Packer 5-2027 <nhlsp@gauss> wrote:
>"But lately I've been finding myself dredging up all sorts of old hurts
>and painful memories. Things that happened 15-20 years ago, and are best
>left buried.
>
>"I've been disturbed by this.
>
>"I was talking with a friend Monday night, and I mentioned this to her.
>She commented that sometimes, if she is happy, contented, and (most
>importantly) feels safe, she finds herself dredging up old garbage. She
>thinks it is her subconscious saying, 'Alright girl, you can deal with
>this now, and you will be alright to get through it.'
>
>"I was hit with a clue x 4. Sometimes something makes so much sense that
>I just have to believe it..."
"YOW! Excuse me while I pick my own splinters out...
Laura - now I understand a part of what's been going on in my life. I
don't know if anyone noticed, but I've been posting on *a lot* of stuff
lately - things that are important to me, that affect me deeply. Old
stuff, new stuff - it's been a... novel experience."
>Here Laura pauses, sips her tea, then says, "I do feel safe in my life
>now. And the things I'm feeling angry about are valid angry things. So it
>makes sense to me (and feels right) that now I finally can clean out some
>of those old hurts, and finally let them heal."
"I don't feel much *safer* as such, but I do feel quite a bit more
*secure* in who I am... and it seems to work much the same way."
>She takes her now empty tea cup in hand, and walks to the chalk line.
>Laura looks down for a long while, and then says, "To memories, and to
>time, and to the patience to let one hide the other until it's time to
>let go."
>
>
><<<CRASH>>>
>
>As the cup shatters it sounds like a young girl's laughter.
"<Big, bright smile> I'll drink to that!"
Ben drains his Diet Coke and Rose's lime juice, and pitches the glass in
after Laura's. The sound is like a gasp of pain... fading, fading away.
Ben
-=-
Ben
sa...@aol.com (Saoba) wrote:
> "*Boom* It hits me. They'd lied to me. All those
>dire predictions about how horrible and dangerous
>anger was, how ever expressing it would cause the
>end of civilization as we know it. A lie told by sad
>frightened people to maintain their own comfort zones.
>I shrieked, turned to my therapist and asked why it
>had taken me 30+ years to catch on."
> "He gave me a huge grin and said, basically, we
>know what we are ready to know, when we are strong
>enough to know it. 'Now we can really start to work.'
>And that was what we did. "
> "It was an amazing moment. It was when I began
>to decide who I am, rather than being who I was told
>to be. So, it took me 30+ years...."
> She tosses her glass toward the fireplace.
> "Call me a late bloomer."
> ***CRASH***
Hey, BarbaraFox - CONGRATULATIONS. 'Late bloomer', hell - some people
*never* reach that point, never learn that lesson.
DAMN, but that's a great thing you've accomplished!
Ben, personally AND vicariously happy
Saoba
>Hey, BarbaraFox - CONGRATULATIONS. 'Late bloomer', hell - some people
>*never* reach that point, never learn that lesson.
>
>DAMN, but that's a great thing you've accomplished!
BarbaraFox gives Ben a mock-stern look.
"I'm sorry, I have a personal rule never to accept
congratulations from anyone with out hugging the stuffing outa them. C'mere,
you."
Ben
sa...@aol.com (Saoba) wrote:
>>Hey, BarbaraFox - CONGRATULATIONS. 'Late bloomer', hell - some people
>>*never* reach that point, never learn that lesson.
>>
>>DAMN, but that's a great thing you've accomplished!
>
> BarbaraFox gives Ben a mock-stern look.
> "I'm sorry, I have a personal rule never to accept
>congratulations from anyone with out hugging the stuffing outa them. C'mere,
>you."
"Uh, can I think about this first?"
<Approximately .2 femtoseconds later>
"Ho-kay, I've thought about it!"
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHug
Ben, flapping like a post-raven Scarecrow imitation <yes, I *know* we've
got a Raven and a Scarecrow in here> -
"I feel... so light-hearted!"
<grin>
"My pleasure, BarbaraFox. BTW, that sounds like a great policy - mind if
I adopt it?"
"Oh, heck. I see I've short-changed you a bit; here's a few more!"
Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug
Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug
Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug
Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug
Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug
Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug
Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug
"Gotta space'em out to make last, y'know!" :)
Ben, who's been a bit short of hugs lately... "Aw better now!" :)
Laura Packer 5-2027
On Mon, 29 Dec 1997, Ben wrote:
> Laura Packer 5-2027 <nhlsp@gauss> wrote:
>
> >"I was talking with a friend Monday night, and I mentioned this to her.
> >She commented that sometimes, if she is happy, contented, and (most
> >importantly) feels safe, she finds herself dredging up old garbage. She
> >thinks it is her subconscious saying, 'Alright girl, you can deal with
> >this now, and you will be alright to get through it.'
> >
> >"I was hit with a clue x 4. Sometimes something makes so much sense that
> >I just have to believe it..."
>
> "YOW! Excuse me while I pick my own splinters out...
>
> Laura - now I understand a part of what's been going on in my life. I
> don't know if anyone noticed, but I've been posting on *a lot* of stuff
> lately - things that are important to me, that affect me deeply. Old
> stuff, new stuff - it's been a... novel experience."
>
> "I don't feel much *safer* as such, but I do feel quite a bit more
> *secure* in who I am... and it seems to work much the same way."
"That's pretty much what I interpret 'safer' to mean. I know and like who
I am. I have friends who know and like me. I have a nice loop of good
feeling and security running through my life."
>
> >She takes her now empty tea cup in hand, and walks to the chalk line.
> >Laura looks down for a long while, and then says, "To memories, and to
> >time, and to the patience to let one hide the other until it's time to
> >let go."
> >
> >
> ><<<CRASH>>>
> >
> >As the cup shatters it sounds like a young girl's laughter.
>
> "<Big, bright smile> I'll drink to that!"
>
> Ben drains his Diet Coke and Rose's lime juice, and pitches the glass in
> after Laura's. The sound is like a gasp of pain... fading, fading away.
Laura gives Ben a hug. "Isn't it wonderful when something makes so much
*sense* that just knowing it helps? I'm really glad this clicked so
rightly with some of you. That is why I posted it in the first place."
Laura
storyteller, folklorist, dreamer
Elocutus of Borg
In article <34a501f3...@news.viaccess.net>,
ben-fu...@geocities.com wrote:
>
> sa...@aol.com (Saoba) wrote:
>
> > "*Boom* It hits me. They'd lied to me. All those
> >dire predictions about how horrible and dangerous
> >anger was, how ever expressing it would cause the
> >end of civilization as we know it. A lie told by sad
> >frightened people to maintain their own comfort zones.
> >I shrieked, turned to my therapist and asked why it
> >had taken me 30+ years to catch on."
> > "He gave me a huge grin and said, basically, we
> >know what we are ready to know, when we are strong
> >enough to know it. 'Now we can really start to work.'
> >And that was what we did. "
> > "It was an amazing moment. It was when I began
> >to decide who I am, rather than being who I was told
> >to be. So, it took me 30+ years...."
> > She tosses her glass toward the fireplace.
> > "Call me a late bloomer."
> > ***CRASH***
>
> *never* reach that point, never learn that lesson.
My epiphany on this front actually came while reading the Tao of Pooh.
The book didn't really say anything I didn't know beforehand, but brought
all of the threads together into one neat bundle. It broke down into
three rules I try to live by at all times:
1. If you can't change a situation, worrying is just a way to make it
more unpleasant. If you can change the situation, worrying clouds the
mind and makes change more difficult.
2. Happiness and misery are both choices.
3. If you know you're going to look back on today and laugh, you might
as well start laughing now.
--Elocutus
-------------------==== Posted via Deja News ====-----------------------
http://www.dejanews.com/ Search, Read, Post to Usenet
Elocutus of Borg
In article <19971229202...@ladder02.news.aol.com>,
sa...@aol.com (Saoba) wrote:
>
> >Hey, BarbaraFox - CONGRATULATIONS. 'Late bloomer', hell - some people
> >*never* reach that point, never learn that lesson.
> >
>
> BarbaraFox gives Ben a mock-stern look.
> "I'm sorry, I have a personal rule never to accept
> congratulations from anyone with out hugging the stuffing outa them. C'mere,
> you."
"Well then," says Elocutus, "let me be the next to offer you my most
heartfelt congratulations."
Saoba
>"Well then," says Elocutus, "let me be the next to offer you my most
>heartfelt congratulations."
BarbaraFox, still reeling from a Ben-Hug-Fest, grins
at Elocutus.
"You, sir, are a shameless opportunist. C'mere."
K Johansson
Ben wrote:<lotsa hugs snipped>
> Ben, flapping like a post-raven Scarecrow imitation <yes, I *know* we've
> got a Raven and a Scarecrow in here> -
>
Raven, hearing her name, swoops over and watches the exhibition. Muttering to
herself, she then flies over Ben and drops a couple of feathers on him. "Well, if
your going for the post-raven look you should at least have a few feathers."
- raven
Saoba
>"Uh, can I think about this first?"
><Approximately .2 femtoseconds later>
>"Ho-kay, I've thought about it!"
>
> HugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugHugH
(snip)
From the vicinity of Ben's right shoulder a muffled
voice is heard.
"I have a WenchCave to design and a Pernicious
to rescue..."
>"Oh, heck. I see I've short-changed you a bit; here's a few more!"
>Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug
> Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hug Hu
(snip)
"Ya'll go ahead without me, I'll catch up... no.
Dammit. Duty calls. Ben, dear heart... save my place."
Xjahn
>sa...@aol.com (Saoba) wrote:
> "*Boom* It hits me. They'd lied to me. All
>those
>dire predictions about how horrible and dangerous
>anger was, how
>ever expressing it would cause the
>end of civilization as we know it.
I remember the moment I was hit in the head with this one.
I was studying acting at the Lee Strasburg Theatre Institute, and the exercise
was to "re-create" a person in your life, and tell them the one thing you
really want to say to them. I'd just had a fight with my father so I picked
him. But try as I might, I couldn't express how angry I truly was.
This would have surprised anyone who knew me at the time - I've got a temper,
and would throw the odd tantrum as a child.
After an hour or so of me sputtering "how dare you" or something to that
effect, My instructor, David Gideon, picked up the clue by 4, and started to
heft it.
DG: What are you feeling right now?
XJ: Anger. I'm really angry.
DG: So why can't you show us?
XJ: I, uh, I'm not sure...
DG: Are you affraid you'll lose your temper?
XJ: YES! If I get too angry, I'll lose my temper...
DG: Have you ever lost your temper before?
XJ: Yes! Yes, I've lost my temper!
DG: You've lost control, then?
XJ: YES!!
And Gideon Takes His Swing!
DG: Did you hurt any body?
WHACK!
XJ: .....uh, no...
DG: Then you've hurt yourself? Punched walls, broken your hand, that sort of
thing?
WHACK!
XJ: ..........um, well, no. Nothing like that.
DG: Then you've never lost your temper.
XJ: Huh?
DG Somebody might have TOLD you you've lost your temper, but if you've never
gone blind mad and started swinging and doing damage to whatever, then
YOU HAVE NEVER LOST CONTROL, have you?
WHACK!!
XJ well, no.
DG Then you have NEVER really lost your temper. Oh, I'm sure you've been
angry, and I'm sure you've raised holy hell, and screamed and shouted,
and even stomped your feet. BUT EXPRESSING YOUR ANGER IS NOT THE SAME
AS LOSING YOUR TEMPER!!
That was MY pivotal moment. I have never been afraid to be angry since then.
And as a result, I rarely lose my temper any more. Just last year, My best
friend from the second grade was commenting on it. I was rebuilding a fishing
reel, and it was fighting me all the way. 15 years ago, I'd of worked myself
into a lather.
NOw, I mutter and swear and cuss the thing out, but it capitulates without
any stamping around and screaming. Because now I know -
I have NEVER "LOST" my temper - it's right here in my pocket.
(-:{ XJahn, the Equity Carpenter
)-:} JOATMOAF, FITWC, FITWE
>>If God meant for us to drink, He would have given us Stomaches.<<
XJahn at aol dot com
Elocutus of Borg
In article <19971230232...@ladder01.news.aol.com>,
sa...@aol.com (Saoba) wrote:
>
> >"Well then," says Elocutus, "let me be the next to offer you my most
> >heartfelt congratulations."
>
> BarbaraFox, still reeling from a Ben-Hug-Fest, grins
> at Elocutus.
> "You, sir, are a shameless opportunist. C'mere."
Shameless and an opportunist? What a great combo. If it weren't my
birthday, that could easily be the nicest thing anybody had said to me
today.
Lady Cheron
Elocutus of Borg wrote:
> If it weren't my
> birthday, that could easily be the nicest thing anybody had said to me
> today.
>
Elocutus - Can I add your birthday to my list? Now that you've
admitted it in public?
--
Lady Cheron, Keeper of the Birthday List for alt.callahans
See it at http://www.callahans.org Reply to LadyCheron
at iName.com (Make sure the first character is "L" not one!)
"Just a hugaholic in search of her next fix."
EC Jester
Elocutus of Borg wrote in message <883510966...@dejanews.com>...
:My epiphany on this front actually came while reading the Tao of Pooh.
:The book didn't really say anything I didn't know beforehand, but brought
:all of the threads together into one neat bundle. It broke down into
:three rules I try to live by at all times:
:
:1. If you can't change a situation, worrying is just a way to make it
:more unpleasant. If you can change the situation, worrying clouds the
:mind and makes change more difficult.
:
:2. Happiness and misery are both choices.
:
:3. If you know you're going to look back on today and laugh, you might
:as well start laughing now.
I love this. Would you mind terribly if I used this as my sig file? I
promise I'll give full credit.
EC Jester
Llbishop
In article <883578318...@dejanews.com>, Elocutus of Borg
<Elocutu...@hotmail.com> writes:
> If it weren't my
birthday, that could easily be the nicest thing anybody had
>said to me
today.
--Elocutus
"Your Birthday? Many Happy Returns!" Nita is leery of singing her traditional
birthday song ... "nah."
Gesi Rovario
I believe I heard llbi...@aol.com (Llbishop) say:
>In article <883578318...@dejanews.com>, Elocutus of Borg
><Elocutu...@hotmail.com> writes:
>
>> If it weren't my
>birthday, that could easily be the nicest thing anybody had
>>said to me
>today.
>
>--Elocutus
>
>"Your Birthday? Many Happy Returns!" Nita is leery of singing her traditional
>birthday song ... "nah."
"Oh, c'mon. Sing. Pleezzee?":) Gesi says as she passes Nita on
the way to Elocutus' table. She pulls a FavoriteFlavorCake out of
the GLBP. "I'm sorry this is late. But I didn't hear about your
birthday till today." She sets the cake in front of him...and if
it turns out he'd rather have a FavoriteFlavorPie, it magically
morphs into one.:) She then digs into the BackPack and pulls out
a silver and black box. She opens the box and removes a candle
the liquid yellow of light. She places it in the center of the
cake and touches a match to the wick. "Elocutus, make a wish,
blow out the candle and have a wonderful year.":)
Gesi
You've got to trust your instinct
And let go of regret
You've got to bet on yourself now, star
'Cause that's your best bet.
-311
Andy May
"Hmm - you'll have to work hard to get it down to three lines 'though.
Perhaps if you used _very_ small letters :)"
[journeyman]
--
***** Andy May - journeyman, traveler, friend to kittens *****
**** http://www.argus.demon.co.uk andy at argus.demon.co.uk ****
Elocutus of Borg
In article <34abb585.56018718@news-server>,
grov...@san.rr.com (Gesi Rovario) wrote:
>
> I believe I heard llbi...@aol.com (Llbishop) say:
>
> >In article <883578318...@dejanews.com>, Elocutus of Borg
> ><Elocutu...@hotmail.com> writes:
> >
> >> If it weren't my
> >birthday, that could easily be the nicest thing anybody had
> >>said to me
> >today.
> >
> >--Elocutus
> >
> >"Your Birthday? Many Happy Returns!" Nita is leery of singing her
traditional
> >birthday song ... "nah."
>
> "Oh, c'mon. Sing. Pleezzee?":) Gesi says as she passes Nita on
> the way to Elocutus' table. She pulls a FavoriteFlavorCake out of
> the GLBP. "I'm sorry this is late. But I didn't hear about your
> birthday till today." She sets the cake in front of him...and if
> it turns out he'd rather have a FavoriteFlavorPie, it magically
> morphs into one.:) She then digs into the BackPack and pulls out
> a silver and black box. She opens the box and removes a candle
> the liquid yellow of light. She places it in the center of the
> cake and touches a match to the wick. "Elocutus, make a wish,
> blow out the candle and have a wonderful year.":)
Chocolate Mudd Cake. How did you know?
I wish everyone in the world would put down their guns and their knives
and renounce violence forever.
That way, I could take over the planet with a butter knife.
--Elocutus
"What do you mean I can't have him killed? It's my BIRTHDAY!"
Mike Boelter
Andy May wrote:
I like Louis Wu's line from 'Ringworld Engineers'
"I have to get over this sometime, why not now?"
him.
Elocutus of Borg <Elocutu...@hotmail.com> wrote:
> grov...@san.rr.com (Gesi Rovario) wrote:
>> I believe I heard llbi...@aol.com (Llbishop) say:
>traditional
>> >birthday song ... "nah."
>> "Oh, c'mon. Sing. Pleezzee?":)
"I dunno." Al says, "With a title like 'nah' I'm not real enthused by it."
>I wish everyone in the world would put down their guns and their knives
>and renounce violence forever.
>That way, I could take over the planet with a butter knife.
"Dogbert. Thanks for reminding me exactly what the quote was."
Big Al. Now, where was that other thread?
Gesi Rovario
I believe I heard Elocutus of Borg <Elocutu...@hotmail.com>
say:
>In article <34abb585.56018718@news-server>,
>grov...@san.rr.com (Gesi Rovario) wrote:
>>
>>I believe I heard llbi...@aol.com (Llbishop) say:
>>
>>>In article <883578318...@dejanews.com>, Elocutus of Borg
>>><Elocutu...@hotmail.com> writes:
>>>
>>>> If it weren't my
>>>birthday, that could easily be the nicest thing anybody had said to me
>>>today.
>>>
>>>--Elocutus
>>>
>>>"Your Birthday? Many Happy Returns!" Nita is leery of singing her
>>>traditional birthday song ... "nah."
>>
>>"Oh, c'mon. Sing. Pleezzee?":) Gesi says as she passes Nita on
>>the way to Elocutus' table. She pulls a FavoriteFlavorCake out of
>>the GLBP. "I'm sorry this is late. But I didn't hear about your
>>birthday till today." She sets the cake in front of him...and if
>>it turns out he'd rather have a FavoriteFlavorPie, it magically
>>morphs into one.:) She then digs into the BackPack and pulls out
>>a silver and black box. She opens the box and removes a candle
>>the liquid yellow of light. She places it in the center of the
>>cake and touches a match to the wick. "Elocutus, make a wish,
>>blow out the candle and have a wonderful year.":)
>
>Chocolate Mudd Cake. How did you know?
"Knowing things like that is part of being The Cake Wench.":-)
>I wish everyone in the world would put down their guns and their knives
>and renounce violence forever.
>
>That way, I could take over the planet with a butter knife.
LOL!
>--Elocutus
>"What do you mean I can't have him killed? It's my BIRTHDAY!"
"Dija ever see the episode of Freakazoid where The Lobe makes him
think he's got to fulfil everyone's wishes for the day?":)
Gesi
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every
four Americans is suffering from some form of mental
illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're
okay,then it's you.
-Rita Mae Brown
Leonard Erickson
Elocutus of Borg <Elocutu...@hotmail.com> writes:
> I wish everyone in the world would put down their guns and their knives
> and renounce violence forever.
>
> That way, I could take over the planet with a butter knife.
And then the cosmonauts on Mir would return and take it away from you. :-)
--
Leonard Erickson (aka Nemo) kal...@krypton.rain.com
"Nature abhors an atmosphere.
Check your suit.
Check your buddy's suit."
Contagi...@hotmail.com
On Sun, 4 Jan 1998 02:39:58 PST, kal...@krypton.rain.com (Leonard Erickson) wrote:
> Elocutus of Borg <Elocutu...@hotmail.com> writes:
>
> > I wish everyone in the world would put down their guns and their knives
> > and renounce violence forever.
> >
> > That way, I could take over the planet with a butter knife.
>
> And then the cosmonauts on Mir would return and take it away from you. :-)
Contagious Spice
(Just call me Connie for short)
--
Posted using Reference.COM http://www.reference.com
Browse, Search and Post Usenet and Mailing list Archive and Catalog.
Sift, Inc. accepts no responsibility for the content of this posting.
EC Jester
Elocutus of Borg wrote in message <883782692...@dejanews.com>...
:I wish everyone in the world would put down their guns and their knives
:and renounce violence forever.
:
:That way, I could take over the planet with a butter knife.
We return you now to the Dilbert Cartoon already in progress:
Dilbert: What's your position on gun ownership, Dogbert?
Dogbert: I believe everyone should have the right to own guns.
Dilbert: What about automatic weapons?
Dogbert: I'm all for them. Citizens should have bazookas and rocket
launchers, too. I believe that all citizens should have the weapons of
their choice. However I also believe that only *I* should have ammunition.
Because frankly, I wouldn't trust the rest of you goobers with anything more
deadly than string.
Dilbert: What about Charlton Heston?
Dogbert: I'd keep the string away from him.
EC Jester
1. If you can't change a situation, worrying is just a way to make it more
unpleasant. If you can change the situation, worrying clouds the mind and
makes change more difficult.
2. Happiness and misery are both choices.
3. If you know you're going to look back on today and laugh, you might as
well start laughing now.
--Elocutus of Borg (posted to alt.callahans 12/30/97)
Lee S. Billings
In article <68rmmp$ohe$1...@orthanc.reference.com>,
Contagi...@hotmail.com says...
>
>
>On Sun, 4 Jan 1998 02:39:58 PST, kal...@krypton.rain.com (Leonard
Erickson) wrot
>e:
>> Elocutus of Borg <Elocutu...@hotmail.com> writes:
>>
knives
>> > and renounce violence forever.
>> >
>> > That way, I could take over the planet with a butter knife.
>>
you. :-)
>
>Well, maybe if they FALL on you.
>
>Contagious Spice
>(Just call me Connie for short)
Celine lifts her voice briefly in song:
"Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
Celine :-p
Gree...@juno.com
In article <68sb8j$n...@camel18.mindspring.com>,
stard...@mindspring.com (Lee S. Billings) wrote:
>
> "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
>
And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
Monk
That was Zen, This is Tao
Take the Eccentric Survey http://www.biznizweb.com/JamesFE/
Rebecca Schoenberg
Gree...@juno.com wrote:
: > "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
: And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
"Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen years of my
life?"
-banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
carla m callahan
98.134...@dejanews.com>:
Distribution:
Gree...@juno.com wrote:
: In article <68sb8j$n...@camel18.mindspring.com>,
: stard...@mindspring.com (Lee S. Billings) wrote:
: >
: > "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
: >
: And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
"Now Monk, we've been through this already... New Jersey may be a figment
of *your* imagination, but the folks from there get really upset when you
say they don't exist..." ;)
Cat-Dancing
Kate
On 7 Jan 1998 11:30:47 GMT, sidhe@hotblack (Rebecca Schoenberg) did
scrawl:
>Gree...@juno.com wrote:
>
>: > "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
>
>: And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
>
>: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
>
>"Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen years of my
>life?"
>
> -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
"Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I moved
from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
folks buy real beer."
Kate
Who's pretty sure Nebraska is the one that really isn't there
High Maintenance. And Worth It.
Who put a stop payment on my reality check?
k...@iname.com Weather on IRC
weather_...@mailcity.com
Rebecca Schoenberg
Kate (k...@iname.com) wrote:
: > -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
: "Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I moved
: from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
: folks buy real beer."
"Unfortunately, Kate, you're coming up against years of personal conviction.
Can you prove that you drove through Wyoming? Pictures can be faked. And
a sign saying "Wyoming" can be made by anyone. I know the truth - all that
pretty, open wilderness is where they're hiding the secret alien cloning
bases."
-bansfnordhee
Matthew T. Russotto
In article <884116698....@dejanews.com>, <Gree...@juno.com> wrote:
}In article <68sb8j$n...@camel18.mindspring.com>,
}>
}> "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
}>
}
}And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
}
}'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
Ahh, if it were so, the beach would be so much closer...
---MTR
(In-Real-Life, not far west of the shore town called Philadelphia, PA)
--
Matthew T. Russotto russ...@pond.com
"Extremism in defense of liberty is no vice, and moderation in pursuit
of justice is no virtue."
Leonard Erickson
grov...@san.rr.com (Gesi Rovario) writes:
> I believe I heard k...@iname.com (Kate ) say:
>
>>On 7 Jan 1998 11:30:47 GMT, sidhe@hotblack (Rebecca Schoenberg) did
>>scrawl:
>>
>>>Gree...@juno.com wrote:
>>>
>>>: > "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
>>>
>>>: And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
>>>
>>>: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
>>>
>>>"Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen years of my
>>>life?"
>>>
>>> -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
>>
>>"Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I moved
>>from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
>>folks buy real beer."
>>
>>Kate
>>Who's pretty sure Nebraska is the one that really isn't there
>>High Maintenance. And Worth It.
>
> "No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
> Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
As a loyal follower of the late Tom McCall (former governor of Oregon)
and in the tradition of the "Oregon Un-Greeting Cards". I must assure
you that it is Oregon that doesn't exist.
Gesi Rovario
I believe I heard k...@iname.com (Kate ) say:
>On 7 Jan 1998 11:30:47 GMT, sidhe@hotblack (Rebecca Schoenberg) did
>scrawl:
>
>>Gree...@juno.com wrote:
>>
>>: > "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
>>
>>: And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
>>
>>: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
>>
>>"Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen years of my
>>life?"
>>
>> -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
>
>"Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I moved
>from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
>folks buy real beer."
>
>Kate
>Who's pretty sure Nebraska is the one that really isn't there
>High Maintenance. And Worth It.
"No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
Gesi
Lauging with someone is as close as you can get to
them without hugging them.
-Regina Barreca
Arnis Kletnieks
Gesi Rovario <grov...@san.rr.com> wrote:
: "No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
: Nebraska.
"Sorry, not good enough. Anybody can *claim* to be from Nebraska.
And you can be darned tootin' sure those clones won't claim they came from
Area 51..."
: ... I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
"Nope, Iowa's there. Been there myself a number of times, visiting my
grandmother. And Grandma sure as heck wasn't no guv'mint plant, I can
tell you...."
-Umbran, who expects that it
is really Washington DC that
doesn't have an objective
existance
Laura Packer 5-2027
On Thu, 8 Jan 1998, Gesi Rovario wrote:
> I believe I heard k...@iname.com (Kate ) say:
>
> >On 7 Jan 1998 11:30:47 GMT, sidhe@hotblack (Rebecca Schoenberg) did
> >scrawl:
> >
> >>Gree...@juno.com wrote:
> >>
> >>: > "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
> >>
> >>: And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
> >>
> >>: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
> >>
> >>"Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen years of my
> >>life?"
> >>
> >> -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
> >
> >"Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I moved
> >from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
> >folks buy real beer."
> >
> >Kate
> >Who's pretty sure Nebraska is the one that really isn't there
> >High Maintenance. And Worth It.
>
> "No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
> Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
>
> Gesi
"Hey! Then where's Rivka? No, I think it's probably Florida that doesn't
exist..."
Laura
storyteller, folklorist, dreamer
Bill Gawne
The Marine at the end of the bar listens as various patrons discuss the
existance of various states.
Monk:
> >>: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
Banshee:
> >>"Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen years of my
> >>life?"
> >>
> >> -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
Kate:
> >"Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I moved
> >from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
> >folks buy real beer."
> >
> >Kate
> >Who's pretty sure Nebraska is the one that really isn't there
> >High Maintenance. And Worth It.
Gesi:
> "No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
> Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
Bill can assure y'all that New Jersey, and Wyoming, and Nebraska, and Iowa
all exist. I've driven through them all. Three within the past few months.
I haven't been in Wyoming since 1976, but I'll take Kate's word it's still
there.
(And planning to drive through New Jersey tomorrow, for that matter.)
They all have something memorable about them too. Southern New Jersey is
beautiful, with Cape May and the lovely historical areas around it.
Wyoming's mountains and chaparral are beautiful in a wild sort of fashion.
Iowa has the high rolling farm country of the northern great plains (and
Rivka, and Freddy). Nebraska has 75 mph speed limits, and the "penis of
the plains", it's unforgettable state capitol building. (Very tall tower
with a dome on top. And at the _very_ tip top, a statue of 'the sower of
the seed'. You can see it for miles as you approach Lincoln from the west.
It slowly rises above the flat Nebraska horizon. Some architect had a
sense of humor.)
--
Bill Gawne, in Callahan's as in real life. <ga...@pha.jhu.edu>
Senior Science Instrument Operations Analyst, Far Ultraviolet Spectroscopic
Explorer. Retired Master Sergeant USMCR. Nothing I post in alt.callahans
represents an official position of any organization.
On the web: http://www.pha.jhu.edu/~gawne
pe...@vcommons.com
kal...@krypton.rain.com (Leonard Erickson) wrote:
>
> grov...@san.rr.com (Gesi Rovario) writes:
>
> > I believe I heard k...@iname.com (Kate ) say:
> >
> >>On 7 Jan 1998 11:30:47 GMT, sidhe@hotblack (Rebecca Schoenberg) did
> >>scrawl:
> >>
> >>>Gree...@juno.com wrote:
> >>>
> >>>: And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
> >>>
> >>>
> >>>life?"
> >>>
> >>> -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
> >>
> >>Kate
> >>High Maintenance. And Worth It.
> >
> > Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
>
> and in the tradition of the "Oregon Un-Greeting Cards". I must assure
> you that it is Oregon that doesn't exist.
>
[descending from the rafters]
Funny...I've always felt that Washington doesn't exist. To prove my
point, a simulated conversation between my mother and another tourist,
one summer vacation: (This is simulated, but similar conversations
happened several times with only variations in the script)
Tourist: So, where are you folks from?
Mom: Washington.
T: Really! And how's the weather on the East Coast?
M: I mean, Washington State.
T: (look of confusion)
I'm not saying that the people in WA don't exist - that would be a nasty
paradox to resolve. It's just that a lot of Americans seem to have this
map in their heads with Seattle up in the northwest part of the US,
surrounded by a patch of land with no name that's about the size of a
state.
Peter Eng - Representative, Department of Stupid Ideas
Ali866
In article <34b42108.4128247@news-server>, grov...@san.rr.com (Gesi Rovario)
writes:
>"No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
Nebraska. I
>thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
Ali looks puzzled. "No, that can't be right. My ex is from Iowa - so, while
it's not *all* there, it is there...I always thought it was Idaho that wasn't
really there..."
Ali ;-)
If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
BetNoir
Bill Gawne wrote:
> Bill can assure y'all that New Jersey, and Wyoming, and Nebraska, and Iowa
> all exist. I've driven through them all. Three within the past few months.
> I haven't been in Wyoming since 1976, but I'll take Kate's word it's still
> there.
Yep....it's them itty bitty towns in South Texas that don't exist...
I once dated a guy from Kingsville, Texas (about an hour in from Corpus
Christi). He took me driving around to London, Texas and Riviera, Texas and (I
think the name was) Beeville, Texas.
And yanno what? None of 'em are THERE! No people, no buildings, nuttin'. Well,
save a few cows placidly staring at you (it's serious COW COUNTRY in South
Texas).
Or Little Lake, California, on the I-395 headed up to Mammoth and Tahoe. A
broken-down gas station, a small pond, and an abandoned neon-pink hotel that
looks like a cathouse out of the Ponderosa days.
WareWolf96
In article <691jcf$6kk$1...@news3.tufts.edu>, Arnis Kletnieks
<akle...@emerald.tufts.edu> writes:
>
Gesi Rovario <grov...@san.rr.com> wrote:
: "No, no, Nebraska's there. I've
>met people who claim to be from
: Nebraska.
"Sorry, not good enough.
>Anybody can *claim* to be from Nebraska.
And you can be darned tootin' sure
>those clones won't claim they came from
Area 51..."
: ... I thought it was
>Iowa that really isn't there."
"Nope, Iowa's there. Been there myself a
>number of times, visiting my
grandmother. And Grandma sure as heck wasn't no
>guv'mint plant, I can
tell you...."
-Umbran, who expects that it
>is really Washington DC that doesn't have an objective existance
You're ALL wrong. It's Missouri. How do I know? One time on a cross country
trip, I had to "pass through" (HAH!) what purported to be Missouri. I crossed
the "border" (Double HAH!) with the Welcome to... sign. That's the last thing I
remember until I was in Kansas. There was nothing where Missouri was supposed
to be, or I would have remembered more of it.
Dusty
Posted and e-mailed(-I hope)
Kate
On Thu, 8 Jan 1998 08:57:22 -0500, Laura Packer 5-2027 <nhlsp@gauss>
did scrawl:
>On Thu, 8 Jan 1998, Gesi Rovario wrote:
>
>> I believe I heard k...@iname.com (Kate ) say:
>>
>> >On 7 Jan 1998 11:30:47 GMT, sidhe@hotblack (Rebecca Schoenberg) did
>> >scrawl:
>> >
>> >>Gree...@juno.com wrote:
>> >>
>> >>: > "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
>> >>
>> >>: And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
>> >>
>> >>: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
>> >>
>> >>"Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen years of my
>> >>life?"
>> >>
>> >> -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
>> >
>> >"Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I moved
>> >from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
>> >folks buy real beer."
>> >
>> >Kate
>> >Who's pretty sure Nebraska is the one that really isn't there
>> >High Maintenance. And Worth It.
>>
>> "No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
>> Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
>>
>> Gesi
>
>"Hey! Then where's Rivka? No, I think it's probably Florida that doesn't
>exist..."
I can't handle the idea. If there were no Florida, then there would be
no Fort Lauderdale, no Busted Flush, no Travis McGee. Florida's got to
exist. (besides I've been there).
Hmm.
Kate
Who's now in a state of confusion
High Maintenance. And Worth It.
Who put a stop payment on my reality check?
(TCWWTW)
Gesi Rovario <grov...@san.rr.com>eloquently stated that
> I believe I heard k...@iname.com (Kate ) say:
> >On 7 Jan 1998 11:30:47 GMT, sidhe@hotblack (Rebecca Schoenberg)
did
> >scrawl:
> >>Gree...@juno.com wrote:
> >>: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
> >>"Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen
years of my
> >>life?"
> >> -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
> >"Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I
moved
> >from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
> >folks buy real beer."
> >Kate
> >Who's pretty sure Nebraska is the one that really isn't there
> >High Maintenance. And Worth It.
> "No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
> Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
"I hope to hell that Iowa exists, considering I'm driving there in
a month or so."
Pixel leans over and whispers conspiritorialy
"I'll let you in on a secret, Conneticut doesn't really exist. Take
it from someone who contributed to the farce for the first 18 years
of his life. There is nothing to Conneticut except detailed matte
paintings along the border, and along the highway. We just pretend
that there really is a state, in actuality, everyone is hiding out in
New York."
Pixel (tired of living a lie)
--
the best thing you've ever done for me
Is to help me take my life less seriously,
it's only life after all. -Indigo Girls-
* Pi...@ids.net * * http://users.ids.net/~pixel *
R. Wald
(p & e)
In article <34b42108.4128247@news-server>,
Gesi Rovario <grov...@san.rr.com> wrote:
>
>"No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
>Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
>
Rivka's jaw drops. "Oh, is *that* why they offered me so much money to go
to school here? Because there *is* no 'Iowa' in the 'University of Iowa?'"
She reflects for a moment, then smiles. "I guess that means the semester
can't possibly be starting next week, huh?"
--
__________________________________________________________________________
Rebecca L. Wald |"To have all the time in the world to devote to love
graduate student | may be idyllic for a summer, but linked sweetness long
U Iowa Psych Dept.| drawn out is the greater luxury." -Robertson Davies
R. Wald
In article <01bd1c5e$d5a97cc0$61d1...@pixel.ids.net>,
>> Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
>
>a month or so."
Rivka starts jumping up and down with glee. "Pixel, now you've said it in
public, and that means I get to *hold* you to it. Yay!"
Curt Booth
> Yep....it's them itty bitty towns in South Texas that don't exist...
> I once dated a guy from Kingsville, Texas (about an hour in from Corpus
> Christi). He took me driving around to London, Texas and Riviera, Texas and (I
> think the name was) Beeville, Texas.
> And yanno what? None of 'em are THERE! No people, no buildings, nuttin'. Well,
> save a few cows placidly staring at you (it's serious COW COUNTRY in South
> Texas).
> Or Little Lake, California, on the I-395 headed up to Mammoth and Tahoe. A
> broken-down gas station, a small pond, and an abandoned neon-pink hotel that
> looks like a cathouse out of the Ponderosa days.
"Oh the towns are there alright. You just can't see them when you drive by
them. I dunno if its stealth technology, extradimentional phenomenon or
just bad lighting, but they are there. When and if you do stop, you'll
hear the famous High Texanese greeting, 'You ain't from around here, are
ye?' Of course you might be starin' down a scattergun at the same time. It
depends on local custom." said the smiling Scot and former Tejas
tourguide.
Curt Booth
cbo...@u.arizona.edu
"I worry that the person who thought up Muzak may be thinking up
something else."
--Lily Tomlin
Kate
On 7 Jan 1998 21:28:35 GMT, sidhe@hotblack (Rebecca Schoenberg) did
scrawl:
>Kate (k...@iname.com) wrote:
>: > -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
>: "Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I moved
>: from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
>: folks buy real beer."
>"Unfortunately, Kate, you're coming up against years of personal conviction.
>Can you prove that you drove through Wyoming? Pictures can be faked. And
>a sign saying "Wyoming" can be made by anyone. I know the truth - all that
>pretty, open wilderness is where they're hiding the secret alien cloning
>bases."
"And the cowboys and the horses are just window dressing? " Kate
ponders that for a moment. "Hmm, I can understand the terrain
blocking secret alient cloning labs. That makes perfect sense. Driving
through was rough going, even in good weather.
"On the other foot, if it weren't for Wyoming, or a place definitely
outside of Utah that called itself that, I wouldn't have been able to
drink real beer for seven years. I got it rarely enough as it was."
Kate
Bordering the State of Insanity, and considering a permanent move
High Maintenance. And Worth It.
Who put a stop payment on my reality check?
Ben
Arnis Kletnieks <akle...@emerald.tufts.edu> wrote:
>Gesi Rovario <grov...@san.rr.com> wrote:
>
>: "No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
>: Nebraska.
>
> "Sorry, not good enough. Anybody can *claim* to be from Nebraska.
>And you can be darned tootin' sure those clones won't claim they came from
>Area 51..."
>
>: ... I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
>
> "Nope, Iowa's there. Been there myself a number of times, visiting my
>grandmother. And Grandma sure as heck wasn't no guv'mint plant, I can
>tell you...."
>
> -Umbran, who expects that it
> is really Washington DC that
> doesn't have an objective
> existance
No-no-no. North Dakota. _Definitely._ That place possesses the solid
kind of non-existence you can point to and say: "See? I told you! It
really _isn't_ there!" I remember flying there to teach an Advanced
Troubleshooting seminar, and the 'bump' as we crossed the Twilight Zone
was *quite* distinct.
Moreover, 1) their cops were polite, 2) the hotel restaurant actually
served _excellent_ food (a dead giveaway; how naive do these aliens
think we actually are?), and 3) THERE WAS NO TRAFFIC on the way to the
airport.
<sigh> They don't make brain-sucking BEMs like they used to...
Ben
-=-
Jim M. Pierce
banshee wrote:
[] Gree...@juno.com wrote:
[]
[] : > "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
[]
[] : And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
[] : 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
[]
[] "Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen years of my
[] life?"
[] -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
Now as we all know... :-) New Mexico is not part of the United
States, according to some otherwise intelligent people.
I always thought the Republic of Mexico was another country.
DJ.
--
Jim M. Pierce jmpi...@medea.gp.usm.edu
My electronic mailbox is provided for personal correspondence and other
solicited e-mail *only*. I consider any other use as theft of service.
Suspicious advertisments, where I have some reason to suspect fraud,
will be forwarded to the US FTC.
Anne Gwin
In article <19980108174...@ladder02.news.aol.com>,
warew...@aol.com (WareWolf96) wrote:
> You're ALL wrong. It's Missouri. How do I know? One time on a cross country
> trip, I had to "pass through" (HAH!) what purported to be Missouri. I crossed
> the "border" (Double HAH!) with the Welcome to... sign. That's the last
thing I
> remember until I was in Kansas. There was nothing where Missouri was supposed
> to be, or I would have remembered more of it.
No, Missouri exists--I have *very* clear memories of the Laura Ingalls
Wilder museum. (And I still have the doll I got there, too.)
Anne
--
Machine shared by Anne Gwin (agwin*AT*mail.utexas.edu) and Nyarlathotep (nyarlathotep*AT*mail.utexas.edu). Sometimes we forget to change the name on the post.
<Discussing an image of a black rectangle silhouetted against the Martian landscape> "That is the top of the calibration target, that is _not_ in fact a monolith."--NASA TV commentator, 7/5/97
"This life is slow suicide, unless you read."
--Lt. Tom Keefer, The Caine Mutiny.
John Vinson
On 8 Jan 1998 19:09:40 GMT, rw...@blue.weeg.uiowa.edu (R. Wald) wrote:
>In article <01bd1c5e$d5a97cc0$61d1...@pixel.ids.net>,
>(TCWWTW) <Pi...@ids.net> wrote:
>> "I hope to hell that Iowa exists, considering I'm driving there in
>>a month or so."
>
>Rivka starts jumping up and down with glee. "Pixel, now you've said it in
>public, and that means I get to *hold* you to it. Yay!"
"Hold him to *WHAT*, Rivka? And will there be pictures?" asks John
the Wysard.
Laura Packer 5-2027
On Thu, 8 Jan 1998, Kate wrote:
> On Thu, 8 Jan 1998 08:57:22 -0500, Laura Packer 5-2027 <nhlsp@gauss>
> did scrawl:
>
> >On Thu, 8 Jan 1998, Gesi Rovario wrote:
> >
> >> I believe I heard k...@iname.com (Kate ) say:
> >>
> >> >On 7 Jan 1998 11:30:47 GMT, sidhe@hotblack (Rebecca Schoenberg) did
> >> >scrawl:
> >> >
> >> >>Gree...@juno.com wrote:
> >> >>
> >> >>: > "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
> >> >>
> >> >>: And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
> >> >>
> >> >>: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
> >> >>
> >> >>"Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen years of my
> >> >>life?"
> >> >>
> >> >> -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
> >> >
> >> >"Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I moved
> >> >from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
> >> >folks buy real beer."
> >> >
> >> >Kate
> >> >Who's pretty sure Nebraska is the one that really isn't there
> >> >High Maintenance. And Worth It.
> >>
> >> "No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
> >> Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
> >>
> >> Gesi
> >
> >"Hey! Then where's Rivka? No, I think it's probably Florida that doesn't
> >exist..."
>
> I can't handle the idea. If there were no Florida, then there would be
> no Fort Lauderdale, no Busted Flush, no Travis McGee. Florida's got to
> exist. (besides I've been there).
>
> Hmm.
>
> Kate
> Who's now in a state of confusion
Aha! I've got it! Just before the Civil war, there was a state called
Franklin, sort of the western part of N.Carolina, and the eastern edge of
Tennessee. Now, I know *that* no longer exists!
Laura
storyteller, folklorist, dreamer
Ron Koolman
Kate wrote:
>
> On 7 Jan 1998 21:28:35 GMT, sidhe@hotblack (Rebecca Schoenberg) did
> scrawl:
>
> >Kate (k...@iname.com) wrote:
>
> >: > -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
>
> >: "Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I moved
> >: from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
> >: folks buy real beer."
>
> >Can you prove that you drove through Wyoming? Pictures can be faked. And
> >a sign saying "Wyoming" can be made by anyone. I know the truth - all that
> >pretty, open wilderness is where they're hiding the secret alien cloning
> >bases."
>
> "And the cowboys and the horses are just window dressing? " Kate
> ponders that for a moment. "Hmm, I can understand the terrain
> blocking secret alient cloning labs. That makes perfect sense. Driving
> through was rough going, even in good weather.
>
> "On the other foot, if it weren't for Wyoming, or a place definitely
> outside of Utah that called itself that, I wouldn't have been able to
> drink real beer for seven years. I got it rarely enough as it was."
>
> Kate
> Bordering the State of Insanity, and considering a permanent move
>
>
>
> k...@iname.com Weather on IRC
> weather_...@mailcity.com
No, it's Cincinnati that doesn't exist. Or at least it wouldn't if I had
a fast enough plane and a big enough nuke.
--
Being free is no guarantee of happiness,
but if you're unhappy, at least it's on
your own terms rather than someone else's.
ANSWERS TO: Ron dot Koolman at bigfoot dot com
rhu...@fcc.gov jqu...@fcc.gov sn...@fcc.gov
rch...@fcc.gov pyr...@ftc.gov
ab...@one.net ab...@bigfoot.com
R. Wald
In article <34b538c3...@news.cyberhighway.net>,
"How *can* there be?" Rivka asks innocently. "After all, Iowa doesn't
exist."
Brandon S. Allbery KF8NH; to reply, change void to kf8nh
In <884279025...@dejanews.com>, on 01/08/98 at 11:13 AM,
pe...@vcommons.com said:
+-----
| M: I mean, Washington State.
| T: (look of confusion)
Which is nothing compared to the folks who think you need a visa and
immunixations to visit New Mexico....
--
brandon s. allbery [Team OS/2][Linux][JAPH] b...@void.apk.net
cleveland, ohio mr/2 ice's "rfc guru" :-) KF8NH
"Never piss off a bard, for they are not at all subtle and your name scans to
`Greensleeves'." ---unknown, quoted by Janet D. Miles in alt.callahans
Leonard Erickson
pe...@NOSPAMseattleonline.com writes:
> Funny...I've always felt that Washington doesn't exist. To prove my
> point, a simulated conversation between my mother and another tourist,
> one summer vacation: (This is simulated, but similar conversations
> happened several times with only variations in the script)
>
> Tourist: So, where are you folks from?
>
> Mom: Washington.
>
> T: Really! And how's the weather on the East Coast?
>
> M: I mean, Washington State.
>
> T: (look of confusion)
>
> I'm not saying that the people in WA don't exist - that would be a nasty
> paradox to resolve. It's just that a lot of Americans seem to have this
> map in their heads with Seattle up in the northwest part of the US,
> surrounded by a patch of land with no name that's about the size of a
> state.
It gets better. Anyplace in the NorthWest, ask people where Vancouver
is. Unless they live fairly close to Vancouver Wa, or know someone who
does, they'll tell you it's in British Columbia.
It's so much of a problem that the city has *seriously* consider
changing the name to Fort Vancouver (as that's where the city got the
name). To add even more confusion, Vancouver, BC isn't on Vancouver
Island. The big city there is Victoria.
At least there's not a lot of confusion between Portland, OR and
Portland, ME (or any of the other Portlands), probably because they are
on opposite sides of the continent.
Matthew T. Russotto
In article <34b56978$1$ofn$mr2ice@speaker>,
Brandon S. Allbery KF8NH; to reply, change "void" to "kf8nh" <b...@void.apk.net> wrote:
}In <884279025...@dejanews.com>, on 01/08/98 at 11:13 AM,
} pe...@vcommons.com said:
}+-----
}| T: (look of confusion)
}
}Which is nothing compared to the folks who think you need a visa and
}immunixations to visit New Mexico....
But contrary to popular belief, the people who think that aren't
confusing New Mexico with the original Mexico.... US citizens don't
need a visa or immunizations to visit the original, after all :-).
Leonard Erickson
nh...@gauss.bwh.harvard.edu writes:
> Aha! I've got it! Just before the Civil war, there was a state called
> Franklin, sort of the western part of N.Carolina, and the eastern edge of
> Tennessee. Now, I know *that* no longer exists!
I didn't think that was ever more than a proposal.
K Johansson
Leonard Erickson wrote:
> As a loyal follower of the late Tom McCall (former governor of Oregon)
> and in the tradition of the "Oregon Un-Greeting Cards". I must assure
> you that it is Oregon that doesn't exist.
>
Well, if Oregon doesn't exist, that might explain why I have childhood memories
of it as a place for catching freshwater crayfish that were red while alive*.
Obviously faked memories.
*For those who've never seen live freshwater crayfish they're usually a
gray-brown colour.
- raven
Lee S. Billings
In article <19980108171...@ladder02.news.aol.com>,
ali...@aol.com says...
>Nebraska. I
>>thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
>
>
while
>it's not *all* there, it is there...I always thought it was Idaho that
wasn't
>really there..."
No, Idaho's there -- it's just some of the folks in it who aren't all
there!
Celine
John Vinson
On 8 Jan 1998 23:52:10 GMT, rw...@blue.weeg.uiowa.edu (R. Wald) wrote:
>
>>"Hold him to *WHAT*, Rivka? And will there be pictures?" asks John
>>the Wysard.
>
>"How *can* there be?" Rivka asks innocently. "After all, Iowa doesn't
>exist."
"Of course it does!" exclaims the Wysard. "It's the state that
everybody thinks you mean when you say you live in Idaho!"
"And you still didn't say *what* you plan to hold a certain small
yellow-orange cat *TO*..." he adds with a leer.
Arnis Kletnieks
Ron Koolman <Ron.Koolman@.big.foot.com> wrote:
: No, it's Cincinnati that doesn't exist. Or at least it wouldn't if I had
: a fast enough plane and a big enough nuke.
"Or a *REALLY* big cockroach...."
-Umbran, who hasn't heard nearly
enough Dr. Demento to fill the
void in his soul...
Jim M. Pierce
BetNoir wrote:
[] Yep....it's them itty bitty towns in South Texas that don't exist...
[]
[] I once dated a guy from Kingsville, Texas (about an hour in from
[] Corpus Christi). He took me driving around to London, Texas and
[] Riviera, Texas and (I think the name was) Beeville, Texas.
[]
[] And yanno what? None of 'em are THERE! No people, no buildings,
[] nuttin'. Well, save a few cows placidly staring at you (it's
[] serious COW COUNTRY in South Texas).
Gee, the next thing we know, you will claim ya never was in
Beeville neither !
We, neither was I !
I like honey, but not bees. They sting.
Maybe ya missed London, Texas, I figure it aint that far from
Paris, Texas. I remember Paris, in the moonlight with
Kitten.Net.Goddess.
There was no Ricks' nearby ! I was shore disappointed like fur
shure.
I have been to Houston, well the Interstate bypass. I never saw
Houston Itself ! Maybe it wuz stole by aliens and the center of
town is gone ! I dinna know, I aint been there !
I have a headache, goodnight-loving trail.
Uhm thats a cow drive trail, like the Chisolm Trail, but in West,
not Central Texas. The Goodnight-Loving part, not the headache part.
I never heeeard on no Headache [cattle drive] Trail.
Although I did make a trail to the bathroom at 2 in the ackemma
[sounds vaguely obscene...] for to get some pain killers for my
headache. What the headache wanted with them thar headache pills, I
never asked it...
[whack !] Linda, stop thayut !
(TCWWTW)
R. Wald <rw...@blue.weeg.uiowa.edu> eloquently stated that
> (TCWWTW) <Pi...@ids.net> wrote:
> > "I hope to hell that Iowa exists, considering I'm driving there
in
> >a month or so."
>
> Rivka starts jumping up and down with glee. "Pixel, now you've said
it in
> public, and that means I get to *hold* you to it. Yay!"
Pixel waggles his eyebrows and scooches closer to Rivka.
"Hold me to what? You thought was actually going to try and *avoid*
seeing you? Are you feeling ok?
Let me state for the record that any trip that involves seeing two
lovely goodwenchs, and spending time with them is not something to be
canceled without a *very* good reason."
Pixel
Llbishop
In article <693us2$p...@camel15.mindspring.com>, stard...@mindspring.com (Lee
S. Billings) writes:
>No, Idaho's there -- it's just some of the folks in it who aren't all
there!
>
Celine
"No, <insert GAOYC>'s there -- it's just some of the folks in it who aren't all
there! Ain't it the truth!" Nita is LOL as she reads this thread, and trying
to be quiet so as not to wake her beloved husband or kids. "When we were
stationed in Okinawa, and earlier in France and England, I was often amused
that, for the people I met, there were only two states in the United States -
California and Florida! I stopped answereing Alabama in response to questions
of where I was from, instead saying I lived *near* Florida."
"By the by - GAOYC = geographical area of your choice."
Nita, an RPSGT
_________________________________
Prove all things;
Hold fast that which is good.
I Thessalonians 5:21
Rebecca Schoenberg
(TCWWTW) (Pi...@ids.net) wrote:
: > Rivka starts jumping up and down with glee. "Pixel, now you've said
: it in
: > public, and that means I get to *hold* you to it. Yay!"
: Pixel waggles his eyebrows and scooches closer to Rivka.
: "Hold me to what? You thought was actually going to try and *avoid*
: seeing you? Are you feeling ok?
"He better not try to weasel out of it - *I* get him first, and I can
certainly use all the company I can get here in the Flat Place...."
: Let me state for the record that any trip that involves seeing two
: lovely goodwenchs, and spending time with them is not something to be
: canceled without a *very* good reason."
"Admit it, you're just using me for crash space and my cooking skills."
:)
-banshee, introducing her roommate to the finer points of food.
No Chef Boy-ar-dee in this house.....
carla m callahan
98.134...@dejanews.com> <68vp17$1...@hotblack.gweep.net>
<693g4p$9dr$8...@thorn.cc.usm.edu>:
Distribution:
Jim M. Pierce (jmpi...@medea.gp.usm.edu) wrote:
: Now as we all know... :-) New Mexico is not part of the United
: States, according to some otherwise intelligent people.
"That's right, it's not. Believe me, I live here. We don't have paved
roads, indoor plumbing, or English. Oh, and did I mention the passport
that's required?" ;)
Cat-Dancing
Andy May
On Thu, 08 Jan 1998 11:13:50 -0600, pe...@vcommons.com wrote:
>[descending from the rafters]
>
>Funny...I've always felt that Washington doesn't exist. To prove my
>point, a simulated conversation between my mother and another tourist,
>one summer vacation: (This is simulated, but similar conversations
>happened several times with only variations in the script)
>
> Tourist: So, where are you folks from?
>
> Mom: Washington.
>
> T: Really! And how's the weather on the East Coast?
>
> M: I mean, Washington State.
>
> T: (look of confusion)
>
>I'm not saying that the people in WA don't exist - that would be a nasty
>paradox to resolve. It's just that a lot of Americans seem to have this
>map in their heads with Seattle up in the northwest part of the US,
>surrounded by a patch of land with no name that's about the size of a
>state.
>
> Peter Eng - Representative, Department of Stupid Ideas
"Well I'm somewhat ashamed to admit it, but it was really only last
year partway through a getting-increasingly-confused discussion with
an american friend who was visiting that I realised that Washington
State wasn't where (IMHO) it should have been - like neatly nestled
around Washington (DC)."
"Once we got that misconception out of the way, the conversation
became much more coherent."
"Running the Global Locator Thing has taught me more about US
geography than school ever did (which was actually zero, 'cos we never
studied US geography at school)"
[journeyman]
--
***** Andy May - journeyman, traveler, friend to kittens *****
**** http://www.argus.demon.co.uk andy at argus.demon.co.uk ****
Andy May
On 8 Jan 1998 21:23:37 GMT, jmpi...@medea.gp.usm.edu (Jim M. Pierce)
wrote:
>banshee wrote:
>[] Gree...@juno.com wrote:
>[]
>[] : > "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
>[]
>[] : And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
>[]
>[] : 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
>[]
>[] "Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen years of my
>[] life?"
>[]
>[] -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
>
> Now as we all know... :-) New Mexico is not part of the United
>States, according to some otherwise intelligent people.
>
"No ladies and gentlemen, you've got it all wrong. It's America that
doesn't exist - it's just something that was faked up by the guys at
Hollywood (that's Hollywood Road - the props department for Pinewood
Studios in case you're wondering)"
barbara trumpinski
dj:
> I like honey, but not bees. They sting.
> Maybe ya missed London, Texas, I figure it aint that far from
>Paris, Texas. I remember Paris, in the moonlight with
>Kitten.Net.Goddess.
> There was no Ricks' nearby ! I was shore disappointed like fur
>shure.
kitten smiles and starts humming 'as time goes by.' (there's also a
paris, illinois....but i'll bet paris, texas is more fun.)
--
kit...@ux1.cso.uiuc.edu barbara trumpinski
/\ /\ smotu "my life's a soap opera, isn't yours?"
{=.=} 'the serenity to accept the things i cannot change, the courage
~ to change the things i can and the wisdom to know the difference'
Rebecca Schoenberg
Andy May (an...@argus.demon.co.uk) wrote:
: "No ladies and gentlemen, you've got it all wrong. It's America that
: doesn't exist - it's just something that was faked up by the guys at
: Hollywood (that's Hollywood Road - the props department for Pinewood
: Studios in case you're wondering)"
Banshee frowns. "I don't think so. If my life had been made up by people
in Hollywood, I'd be taller and have better hair."
-banshee, wondering if Hollywood horses smell like formaldehyde
WareWolf96
>
> Gee, the next thing we know, you will claim ya never was in
>Beeville neither !
>
> We, neither was I !
>
>
> Maybe ya missed London, Texas, I figure it aint that far from
>Paris, Texas. I remember Paris, in the moonlight with
>Kitten.Net.Goddess.
>
> There was no Ricks' nearby ! I was shore disappointed like fur
>shure.
>
>Houston Itself ! Maybe it wuz stole by aliens and the center of
>town is gone ! I dinna know, I aint been there !
>
> I have a headache, goodnight-loving trail.
>
>Uhm thats a cow drive trail, like the Chisolm Trail, but in West,
>not Central Texas. The Goodnight-Loving part, not the headache part.
>I never heeeard on no Headache [cattle drive] Trail.
>
> Although I did make a trail to the bathroom at 2 in the ackemma
>[sounds vaguely obscene...] for to get some pain killers for my
>headache. What the headache wanted with them thar headache pills, I
>never asked it...
>
> [whack !] Linda, stop thayut !
>
>DJ.
WareWolf listens with interest to DJ, then turns to Mike.
Mike....I'll have whatever HE's having!
Dusty
Posted and e-mailed(-I hope)
Sam Waring
In article <6937fr$rc8$1...@flood.weeg.uiowa.edu>, Rivka said this about that:
> Rivka's jaw drops. "Oh, is *that* why they offered me so much money to go
> to school here? Because there *is* no 'Iowa' in the 'University of Iowa?'"
"Of course--it's like Gertrude Stein said about Oakland: 'There is no
there there.'"
SamIAm
<posted & emailed>
--
***************************************************************************
* Sam Waring * Disclaimer: FlashNet Communications *
* NOTE: Address above is anti-spammed * doesn't necessarily agree with my *
* curmudgn at flash.net * opinions and neither do I. *
* *
* Pursuant to US Code, Title 47, Chapter 5, Subchapter II, §227, any and *
* all unsolicited commercial E-mail sent to this address (curmudgn@ *
* flash.net) is subject to a download and archival fee in the amount of *
* $100 US. E-mailing denotes acceptance of these terms. *
***************************************************************************
Sam Waring
In article <34B5106E...@earthlink.net>, BetNoir said this about that:
> I once dated a guy from Kingsville, Texas (about an hour in from Corpus
> Christi). He took me driving around to London, Texas and Riviera, Texas
> and (I think the name was) Beeville, Texas.
> And yanno what? None of 'em are THERE! No people, no buildings, nuttin'.
> Well, save a few cows placidly staring at you (it's serious COW COUNTRY
> in South Texas).
"Bet, that's because you were down there bummin' around the King
Ranch, and they have really heavy, X-Files type security because of their
Nuclear Santa Gertrudis Implementation Program. They're working on
developing a nuclear-powered cow for the gov'mint, to deliver more bullshit
to more locations faster than it's ever been delivered before."
SamIAm
Elocutus of Borg
In article <Pine.SUN.3.91.980108085620.16330F-100000@gauss>,
nh...@gauss.bwh.harvard.edu wrote:
>
> On Thu, 8 Jan 1998, Gesi Rovario wrote:
>
> > I believe I heard k...@iname.com (Kate ) say:
> >
> > >scrawl:
> > >
> > >>Gree...@juno.com wrote:
> > >>
> > >>: > "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
> > >>
> > >>: And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
> > >>
> > >>: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
> > >>
> > >>"Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen years of my
> > >>life?"
> > >>
> > >> -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
> > >
> > >from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
> > >folks buy real beer."
> > >
> > >Who's pretty sure Nebraska is the one that really isn't there
> >
> > Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
> >
>
> "Hey! Then where's Rivka? No, I think it's probably Florida that doesn't
> exist..."
Florida *must* exist. Otherwise, where would they put "The Happiest
Place on Earth?"[1]
It's Shangri-La that doesn't exist.
--Elocutus
[1]Xanth
-------------------==== Posted via Deja News ====-----------------------
http://www.dejanews.com/ Search, Read, Post to Usenet
John Vinson
On 9 Jan 1998 01:34:58 GMT, stard...@mindspring.com (Lee S.
Billings) wrote:
>>Ali looks puzzled. "No, that can't be right. My ex is from Iowa - so, while
>>it's not *all* there, it is there...I always thought it was Idaho that wasn't
>>really there..."
>
>No, Idaho's there -- it's just some of the folks in it who aren't all
>there!
>
>Celine
John the Wysard pops back home into the body of John Vinson and looks
out the window across the dining room from his loft office.
"It's foggy, Celine, but you're right. Idaho is still there."
"As for the rest of your comment... bear in mind that 'Celine' fits
very well as the last word of the first line of a limerick... and
let's just be nice, HMMM?"
Pat Kight
K Johansson wrote:
>
(sorry, Raven, just using your post to get to the following, which never
made it here)
> Leonard Erickson wrote:
>
> > As a loyal follower of the late Tom McCall (former governor of Oregon)
> > and in the tradition of the "Oregon Un-Greeting Cards". I must assure
> > you that it is Oregon that doesn't exist.
"Huh?!?!?!?" Jezebel lurches out of her drudgery-induced stupor (hey,
you try replacing one teensy tag in each of 249 Web pages and say it
ain't drudgery!)
"But ... but ... if Oregon doesn't exist ...
"WHERE THE HELL AM I?"
--Jezebel
kig...@peak.org
Pat Kight
Sam Waring wrote:
>
> In article <34B5106E...@earthlink.net>, BetNoir said this about that:
>
> > I once dated a guy from Kingsville, Texas (about an hour in from Corpus
> > Christi). He took me driving around to London, Texas and Riviera, Texas
> > and (I think the name was) Beeville, Texas.
>
> > And yanno what? None of 'em are THERE! No people, no buildings, nuttin'.
> > Well, save a few cows placidly staring at you (it's serious COW COUNTRY
> > in South Texas).
>
> "Bet, that's because you were down there bummin' around the King
> Ranch, and they have really heavy, X-Files type security because of their
> Nuclear Santa Gertrudis Implementation Program. They're working on
> developing a nuclear-powered cow for the gov'mint, to deliver more bullshit
> to more locations faster than it's ever been delivered before."
Jezebel laughs.
"Haven't thought of the King Ranch in years. My daddy and his brothers
grew up on the King Ranch ... in the 19-teens and 20s, when it was more
like a ... well ... *RANCH*. Their father, my grandpa, spent many years
as a ranch-hand, and lived on site ... (presumably 'cause there was no
place else *to* live."
The Spinster considers the NSGIP, as described above ... and considers
her late grandpa and multitudinous uncles, masters of B.S. every one.
"Sounds like they're still doin' pretty much the same kind of work,
though."
--Jezebel
born in Houston, smart enough to leave when I was two weeks old. (-;
kig...@peak.org
[posted and emailed]
Jennifer L. Rankin
Laura Packer 5-2027 wrote:
>
> On Thu, 8 Jan 1998, Kate wrote:
>
> > On Thu, 8 Jan 1998 08:57:22 -0500, Laura Packer 5-2027 <nhlsp@gauss>
> > did scrawl:
> >
> > >On Thu, 8 Jan 1998, Gesi Rovario wrote:
> > >
> > >> I believe I heard k...@iname.com (Kate ) say:
> > >>
> > >> >On 7 Jan 1998 11:30:47 GMT, sidhe@hotblack (Rebecca Schoenberg) did
> > >> >scrawl:
> > >> >
> > >> >>Gree...@juno.com wrote:
> > >> >>
> > >> >>: > "Falling down on New Jersey, me boys, falling down on New Jersey..."
> > >> >>
> > >> >>: And another voice is heard from near the Virtual Pizza Machine:
> > >> >>
> > >> >>: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
> > >> >>
> > >> >>"Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen years of my
> > >> >>life?"
> > >> >>
> > >> >> -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
> > >> >
> > >> >"Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I moved
> > >> >from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
> > >> >folks buy real beer."
> > >> >
> > >> >Kate
> > >> >Who's pretty sure Nebraska is the one that really isn't there
> > >> >High Maintenance. And Worth It.
> > >>
> > >> "No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
> > >> Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
> > >>
> > >> Gesi
> > >
> > >"Hey! Then where's Rivka? No, I think it's probably Florida that doesn't
> > >exist..."
> >
> > no Fort Lauderdale, no Busted Flush, no Travis McGee. Florida's got to
> > exist. (besides I've been there).
> >
> > Hmm.
> >
> > Kate
> > Who's now in a state of confusion
>
> Aha! I've got it! Just before the Civil war, there was a state called
> Franklin, sort of the western part of N.Carolina, and the eastern edge of
> Tennessee. Now, I know *that* no longer exists!
>
> storyteller, folklorist, dreamer
My mother always swore South Dakota didn't exist, which played havoc on
my grades when we had to learn all 50 states and their capitols during
fifth grade. Ah, my indoctrination into sarcasm continued.
--jen, no longer so gullible.
Jim M. Pierce
Jim M. Pierce wrote:
[] We, neither was I !
typo.
Should have been 'Well, neither was I !'
DJ.
--
Dreamy Jim aka Jim Pierce Bach. of Sc. Disclaimer:Standard.
Video: Grace Jones 'Slave to the Rhythm'
Jim M. Pierce
barbara trumpinski wrote:
[] kitten smiles and starts humming 'as time goes by.' (there's also a
[] paris, illinois....but i'll bet paris, texas is more fun.)
Besides, I don't live there.
DJ.
--
Jim Pierce Bach. of Sc. Disclaimer:Standard.
" Miniature Crime Fighters !? I have to get out more..." Johnny Bad Note
[ from a Pinky and The Brain episode, from Animaniacs ]
Jim M. Pierce
[journeyman] wrote:
[] "Running the Global Locator Thing has taught me more about US
[] geography than school ever did (which was actually zero, 'cos we never
[] studied US geography at school)"
So my high school geography class taught us more about Britain
that yours taught you about the US ? Thats when I found out where
the Orkney Islands were located. And Wales, Scotland, Isle of Man,
etc. Weird, I thought they would have taught you all that.
Heck, I was even taught where Jersey Island is located.
Brandon S. Allbery KF8NH; to reply, change void to kf8nh
In <34B69D...@ucs.orst.edu>, on 01/09/98 at 01:58 PM,
Pat Kight <kig...@ucs.orst.edu> said:
+-----
| "Huh?!?!?!?" Jezebel lurches out of her drudgery-induced stupor (hey, you
| try replacing one teensy tag in each of 249 Web pages and say it ain't
| drudgery!)
That's what shell scripts are for. Or, preferably, Perl scripts. 30 seconds
to build the script, then make the computer do the drudge work. :-)
--
brandon s. allbery [Team OS/2][Linux][JAPH] b...@void.apk.net
cleveland, ohio mr/2 ice's "rfc guru" :-) KF8NH
"Never piss off a bard, for they are not at all subtle and your name scans to
`Greensleeves'." ---unknown, quoted by Janet D. Miles in alt.callahans
John Vinson
On 9 Jan 1998 14:23:56 GMT, ca...@mirac.unm.edu (carla m callahan)
wrote:
>: Now as we all know... :-) New Mexico is not part of the United
>: States, according to some otherwise intelligent people.
>
>"That's right, it's not. Believe me, I live here. We don't have paved
>roads, indoor plumbing, or English. Oh, and did I mention the passport
>that's required?" ;)
"Now, CatDancing, you're just trying to keep down the tourists. I
understand; you've got such a beautiful and interesting place, it
would be a shame if too many people discovered it."
"But there's a better ploy: let them come, and just put genuine New
Mexico green chile on all the food in the fast-food restaurants. Or
charge double for hamburgers *without* chile..."
"That'll scare off all the furriners!"
Leonard Erickson
Pat Kight <kig...@ucs.orst.edu> writes:
> K Johansson wrote:
>>
> (sorry, Raven, just using your post to get to the following, which never
> made it here)
>
>> Leonard Erickson wrote:
>>
>> > As a loyal follower of the late Tom McCall (former governor of Oregon)
>> > and in the tradition of the "Oregon Un-Greeting Cards". I must assure
>> > you that it is Oregon that doesn't exist.
>
> "Huh?!?!?!?" Jezebel lurches out of her drudgery-induced stupor (hey,
> you try replacing one teensy tag in each of 249 Web pages and say it
> ain't drudgery!)
>
> "But ... but ... if Oregon doesn't exist ...
>
> "WHERE THE HELL AM I?"
Sssshh!
You aren't that far from me.
But we don't want the *non*-Oregonians to come here. There's not enough
of it for the folks that are here already. Let'em move to Washington!
:-)
--
Leonard Erickson (aka Nemo) kal...@krypton.rain.com
"Nature abhors an atmosphere.
Check your suit.
Check your buddy's suit."
Sam Waring
In article <34B69E...@ucs.orst.edu>, Jezebel said this about that:
> "Haven't thought of the King Ranch in years. My daddy and his brothers
> grew up on the King Ranch ... in the 19-teens and 20s, when it was more
> like a ... well ... *RANCH*. Their father, my grandpa, spent many years
> as a ranch-hand, and lived on site ... (presumably 'cause there was no
> place else *to* live."
"Absolutely! When you're talking about 800,000-plus acres, it's hard
to find somewhere to live on that *isn't* the ranch. Kenedy County, down
on the Rio Grande plain, is practically nothing but the King ranch--the
population's not even a thousand people, and I don't want to think how many
cows--lots more than there are people, for certain. Come to think of it,
the ranch extends over two *states*, Texas and Florida, and they even used
to own land in Australia for a while. Them Klebergs are an acquisitive
lot."
SamIAm
<posted & emailed>
dki...@valunet.com
In article , sidhe@hotblack says...
Yeah, and I'd be thinner and have more hair. And Trigger is
the only Hollywood horse I know of that's full of formaldehyde.
Dave
"Tam multi libri, tam breve tempus!"
(Et brevis pecunia.) [Et breve spatium.]
dki...@valunet.com
In article , curm...@ex-parrot.flash.net says...
>
> "Absolutely! When you're talking about 800,000-plus acres, it's hard
>to find somewhere to live on that *isn't* the ranch. Kenedy County, down
>on the Rio Grande plain, is practically nothing but the King ranch--the
>population's not even a thousand people, and I don't want to think how many
>cows--lots more than there are people, for certain. Come to think of it,
>the ranch extends over two *states*, Texas and Florida, and they even used
>to own land in Australia for a while. Them Klebergs are an acquisitive
>lot."
>
>
> SamIAm
So, do they use a bridge or a tunnel to get the cows from the
front pasture to the back pasture? Or do they make the cows swim?
Dave, just trying to visualize a *ranch* from Texas to Florida
Rebecca Schoenberg
Elocutus of Borg (Elocutu...@hotmail.com) wrote:
: Florida *must* exist. Otherwise, where would they put "The Happiest
: Place on Earth?"[1]
: It's Shangri-La that doesn't exist.
: --Elocutus
: [1]Xanth
Banshee almost swallows her tongue, kittening while she's not actually drinking
anything. "I read that whole series in four days when I was 13 years old
and stoned out of my gourd on prescription-strength cough syrup and sleep
deprivation. It *still* didn't make any sense....."
-banshee, who gave up on Piers Anthony shortly thereafter
Lee S. Billings
In article <34b64ed6...@news.cyberhighway.net>,
jvi...@cyberhighway.net says...
Now, now, notice that I did say "some," not "all"... and you were
definitely one of the reasons for inserting that qualification!
Celine (who's never been made into a limerick before...)
Lee S. Billings
In article <01bd1ceb$1d15c460$12d1...@pixel.ids.net>, Pi...@ids.net
says...
>
>R. Wald <rw...@blue.weeg.uiowa.edu> eloquently stated that
>> (TCWWTW) <Pi...@ids.net> wrote:
>> > "I hope to hell that Iowa exists, considering I'm driving there
>in
>> >a month or so."
>>
>> Rivka starts jumping up and down with glee. "Pixel, now you've said
>it in
>> public, and that means I get to *hold* you to it. Yay!"
>
> Pixel waggles his eyebrows and scooches closer to Rivka.
>
> "Hold me to what? You thought was actually going to try and *avoid*
>seeing you? Are you feeling ok?
>lovely goodwenchs, and spending time with them is not something to be
>canceled without a *very* good reason."
Take a southern loop back thru TN, and you can make that three...
Celine
Anne Gwin
>
> "But ... but ... if Oregon doesn't exist ...
>
> "WHERE THE HELL AM I?"
Anne hazards a guess. "The WenchCave?"
--
Machine shared by Anne Gwin (agwin*AT*mail.utexas.edu) and Nyarlathotep (nyarlathotep*AT*mail.utexas.edu). Sometimes we forget to change the name on the post.
<Discussing an image of a black rectangle silhouetted against the Martian landscape> "That is the top of the calibration target, that is _not_ in fact a monolith."--NASA TV commentator, 7/5/97
"This life is slow suicide, unless you read."
--Lt. Tom Keefer, The Caine Mutiny.
Lee S. Billings
In article <34b5d1ec....@news.demon.co.uk>,
an...@argus.demon.co.uk says...
>"Well I'm somewhat ashamed to admit it, but it was really only last
>year partway through a getting-increasingly-confused discussion with
>an american friend who was visiting that I realised that Washington
>State wasn't where (IMHO) it should have been - like neatly nestled
>around Washington (DC)."
I remember thinking the same thing when I was little!
>"Running the Global Locator Thing has taught me more about US
>geography than school ever did (which was actually zero, 'cos we never
>studied US geography at school)"
There's a series of railroad board games put out by Mayfair Games, one
of which is set in Europe. This led to the following conversation a few
years ago, when all the nastiness in Bosnia was just getting started:
Tom (my ex): I really hate to sound stupid, but -- where's Bosnia?
Me: It's around Sarajevo. (One of the cities on the Eurorails board)
Tom (light dawns): Oh!
We also learned a fair amount of Japanese geography from playing
NipponRail. Amazing how much faster it sinks in when you're doing it
for fun and not for a grade...
Celine
Elana who?
>>
>> > and in the tradition of the "Oregon Un-Greeting Cards". I must assure
>> > you that it is Oregon that doesn't exist.
>
>"Huh?!?!?!?" Jezebel lurches out of her drudgery-induced stupor (hey,
>
>
>"WHERE THE HELL AM I?"
Oregon is a state of *mind*... didn't you know that?? :-)
-Elana
(proud PDX native :)
----
Jumpgate <*> Pin Page: www.aracnet.com/~elana/pin/pin.html
Gesi Rovario
I believe I heard "(TCWWTW)" <Pi...@ids.net> say:
>Gesi Rovario <grov...@san.rr.com>eloquently stated that
>> I believe I heard k...@iname.com (Kate ) say:
>> >On 7 Jan 1998 11:30:47 GMT, sidhe@hotblack (Rebecca Schoenberg)
>did
>> >scrawl:
>> >>Gree...@juno.com wrote:
>> >>: 'New Jersey doesn't exist...'
>
>> >>"Does, too. Otherwise, where did I spend the first seventeen
>years of my
>> >>life?"
>> >> -banshee, who knows that Wyoming is the state that doesn't exist
>
>> >"Banshee, I beg to differ. I had to drive through Wyoming when I
>moved
>> >from Salt Lake to Nashville. It's there. It's also where some Utah
>> >folks buy real beer."
>> >Kate
>> >Who's pretty sure Nebraska is the one that really isn't there
>> >High Maintenance. And Worth It.
>
>> "No, no, Nebraska's there. I've met people who claim to be from
>> Nebraska. I thought it was Iowa that really isn't there."
>
> "I hope to hell that Iowa exists, considering I'm driving there in
>a month or so."
>
> Pixel leans over and whispers conspiritorialy
>
> "I'll let you in on a secret, Conneticut doesn't really exist. Take
>it from someone who contributed to the farce for the first 18 years
>of his life. There is nothing to Conneticut except detailed matte
>paintings along the border, and along the highway. We just pretend
>that there really is a state, in actuality, everyone is hiding out in
>New York."
> Pixel (tired of living a lie)
"The truth will set you free. So, you're saying my darlin'
grandmother was *really* born in New York? Innn-teresting.":*)
Hey, does anyone know if California actually exists? Its kind of
an important question, 'cause...I think I'm here now. But, I'm
not sure."
Gesi
You can see a lot more clearly without the stars in your eyes.
-Randome
Gesi Rovario
I believe I heard jvi...@cyberhighway.net say:
>>On 9 Jan 1998 01:34:58 GMT, stard...@mindspring.com (Lee S.
>>Billings) wrote:
>>
>>
>>>>Ali looks puzzled. "No, that can't be right. My ex is from Iowa -
>>>>so, while it's not *all* there, it is there...I always thought it was Idaho
>>>>that wasn't really there..."
>>
>>No, Idaho's there -- it's just some of the folks in it who aren't all
>>there!
>>
>>Celine
>
>John the Wysard pops back home into the body of John Vinson and looks
>out the window across the dining room from his loft office.
>
>"It's foggy, Celine, but you're right. Idaho is still there."
>
>"As for the rest of your comment... bear in mind that 'Celine' fits
>very well as the last word of the first line of a limerick... and
>let's just be nice, HMMM?"
"I want to hear the limerick. Pleeessseeee.":*) "I'll buy you a
drink or five." (Hey, if begging won't work, I'm not too proud to
resort to bribery.;)
Jim M. Pierce
[p&e]
WareWolf96 wrote:
[] WareWolf listens with interest to DJ, then turns to Mike.
[]
[] Mike....I'll have whatever HE's having!
tsk tsk... :-)
Its just me imagination. I have to do something with all of those
thousands of books I have read over the years. Wedging them into my
story lines and conversations is one way of using all of that
reading.
I don't always do that though. Sometimes my conversations can be
very very boring. Really.
DJ.
--
Jim
" Don't get discouraged...remember, when Cher first started going to the
spa, she already looked like Cher." Jake Vest.
Jim M. Pierce
[p&e]
Jim M. Pierce wrote:
[] [journeyman] wrote:
[] [] "Running the Global Locator Thing has taught me more about US
[] [] geography than school ever did (which was actually zero, 'cos we never
[] [] studied US geography at school)"
[]
[] So my high school geography class taught us more about Britain
[] that yours taught you about the US ? Thats when I found out where
[] the Orkney Islands were located. And Wales, Scotland, Isle of Man,
[] etc. Weird, I thought they would have taught you all that.
[]
[] Heck, I was even taught where Jersey Island is located.
Re-reading this, it sounds like I'm geing a grouch or rude.
I certainly didn't mean it that way.
DJ.
--
Jim Pierce jmpi...@medea.gp.usm.edu Disclaimer: Standard.
Video: 'Leaving Las Vegas' by Sheryl Crow