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a.a. OT Limerick

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kni...@baawa.com

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May 9, 2012, 11:25:59 PM5/9/12
to
Arrrrrrrr...

The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
The dirty little shitter.
He lined his arse with broken glass
and circumcised the Skipper.

Arrrrrrrr...

Wrlord Steve
BAAWA

Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess

unread,
May 9, 2012, 11:37:11 PM5/9/12
to
On Wed, 09 May 2012 20:25:59 -0700
kni...@baawa.com wrote:

> Arrrrrrrr...
>
> The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
> The dirty little shitter.
> He lined his arse with broken glass
> and circumcised the Skipper.
>
> Arrrrrrrr...

Ha ha! The topic should have been set to "Ode to a Pastafarianist."

--
Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess
"He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned
my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for
him, the spinal cord would fully suffice."
-- Dr. Albert Einstein

Mike Lovell

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May 10, 2012, 1:35:37 AM5/10/12
to
On 2012-05-10, kni...@baawa.com <kni...@baawa.com> wrote:
> Arrrrrrrr...
>
> The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
> The dirty little shitter.
> He lined his arse with broken glass
> and circumcised the Skipper.
>
> Arrrrrrrr...

Isn't that (although slightly modified) from Frggin' in the Riggin'?

"It was on the good ship Venus
By Christ, you should've seen us
The figurehead was a whore in bed
And the mast was a mammoth penis"

Best limerick ever...

"To be real was Pinocchio's desire,
of this dream he never did tire,
but he knew he was wood,
when he bashed on his pud,
and the poor little bugger caught fire!"


And of course, the classic...

"Old Mother Hubbard,
went the cupboard,
to get her dog Rover a bone.

When she bent over,
Rover took-over,

And get her a bone of her own!"

--
Jews, Christians & Muslims
The content of your posts will show how much you
really believe God is looking over your shoulder
Message has been deleted

John Locke

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May 10, 2012, 1:51:42 AM5/10/12
to
...another version

"Old Mother Hubbard,
went the cupboard,
to get her poor dog some bread.

When she bent over,
Rover took-over,

And she got bred instead!"

Alex W.

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May 10, 2012, 8:11:55 AM5/10/12
to
On Thu, 10 May 2012 00:44:43 -0800, L. Raymond wrote:

> Mike Lovell wrote:
>
>> "To be real was Pinocchio's desire,
>> of this dream he never did tire,
>> but he knew he was wood,
>> when he bashed on his pud,
>> and the poor little bugger caught fire!"
>
> There once was a man named Chris
> Whose love life was sadly amiss
> For even with Venus
> His recalcitrant penis
> Could never do better than t
> h
> i
> s

A plumber by the side of a tree
Was plumbing his girl with great glee.
Said the girl, "Stop your plumbing"
"There's somebody coming."
Said the plumber still plumbing, "It's me!"


A young Catholic layman named Fox
Makes his living by sucking off cocks
In fits of depression
He goes to confession
And jacks off the priest in the box.

L.Roberts

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May 10, 2012, 8:52:08 AM5/10/12
to
reggie roy, the altar boy
the dirty little beast
filled his ass with broken glass
and circumcised the priest!

modified from:
tommy loy
the cabin boy
the dirty little nipper
filled his ass with broken glass
and circumcised the skipper

MarkA

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May 10, 2012, 9:26:16 AM5/10/12
to
There once was a sailor from Brighton,
Who said to his girl, "You're a tight one."
She said, "Ponce, my dear soul,
"You're in the wrong hole,
"There's plenty of room in the right one!"

--
MarkA
Keeper of Things Put There Only Just The Night Before
About eight o'clock

Andy W

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May 10, 2012, 9:24:53 AM5/10/12
to
I hate to be picky but that isn't a limerick.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry)

Andy

Don Martin

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May 10, 2012, 9:51:41 AM5/10/12
to
"L. Raymond" <badaddress@....com> wrote:
> Mike Lovell wrote:
>
>> "To be real was Pinocchio's desire,
>> of this dream he never did tire,
>> but he knew he was wood,
>> when he bashed on his pud,
>> and the poor little bugger caught fire!"
>
> There once was a man named Chris
> Whose love life was sadly amiss
> For even with Venus
> His recalcitrant penis
> Could never do better than t
> h
> i
> s

Now, THAT'S a limerick!

--
aa #2278 Never mind "proof." Where is your evidence?
BAAWA Chief Assistant to the Assistant Chief Heckler
Fidei defensor (Hon. Antipodean)
The Squeeky Wheel: http://home.comcast.net/~drdonmartin/

Don Martin

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May 10, 2012, 9:51:41 AM5/10/12
to
<kni...@baawa.com> wrote:
> Arrrrrrrr...
>
> The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
> The dirty little shitter.
> He lined his arse with broken glass
> and circumcised the Skipper.
>
From the old song "Christopher Columbo," but in a different version in the
book I grew up with, _My Pious Friends and Drunken Companions: Songs and
Ballads of Conviviality_ by Frank Shay and John Held, Jr., 1927, which has
The second little cabin boy,
The dirty little nipper,
Lined his ass with broken glass, etc.

This is not a limerick.

A bunch of different versions exist (as they commonly do for folk music) of
greater or lesser scatological fervor and may be found on the internet for
your reading and hearing pleasure.

raven1

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May 10, 2012, 9:52:18 AM5/10/12
to
On Wed, 09 May 2012 20:25:59 -0700, kni...@baawa.com wrote:

>Arrrrrrrr...
>
>The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
>The dirty little shitter.
>He lined his arse with broken glass
> and circumcised the Skipper.
>
>Arrrrrrrr...

That's not a limerick.

Tronscend

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May 10, 2012, 9:57:00 AM5/10/12
to

"Don Martin" <drdon...@comcast.net> skrev i melding
news:2057963717358350555.3369...@news20.forteinc.com...
> "L. Raymond" <badaddress@....com> wrote:
>> Mike Lovell wrote:
>>
>>> "To be real was Pinocchio's desire,
>>> of this dream he never did tire,
>>> but he knew he was wood,
>>> when he bashed on his pud,
>>> and the poor little bugger caught fire!"
>>
>> There once was a man named Chris
>> Whose love life was sadly amiss
>> For even with Venus
>> His recalcitrant penis
>> Could never do better than t
>> h
>> i
>> s
>
> Now, THAT'S a limerick!

... not a limprick?


Tronscend

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May 10, 2012, 9:59:16 AM5/10/12
to

<kni...@baawa.com> skrev i melding
news:k2dmq79705rrec0uq...@4ax.com...
> Arrrrrrrr...
>
> The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
> The dirty little shitter.
> He lined his arse with broken glass
> and circumcised the Skipper.


The Altar Boy, The Altar boy
The ..... little ......
He lined his ...... with .......
and ......... the ............


Christopher A. Lee

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May 10, 2012, 10:04:24 AM5/10/12
to
On Thu, 10 May 2012 15:59:16 +0200, "Tronscend" <tron...@frizurf.no>
wrote:
Little beast?

Don Martin

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May 10, 2012, 10:50:35 AM5/10/12
to
MarkA <nob...@nowhere.invalid> wrote:
> On Wed, 09 May 2012 20:25:59 -0700, knight wrote:
>
>> Arrrrrrrr...
>>
>> The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
>> The dirty little shitter.
>> He lined his arse with broken glass
>> and circumcised the Skipper.
>>
>> Arrrrrrrr...
>>
>> Wrlord Steve
>> BAAWA
>
> There once was a sailor from Brighton,
> Who said to his girl, "You're a tight one."
> She said, "Ponce, my dear soul,
> "You're in the wrong hole,
> "There's plenty of room in the right one!"

The deliciously lusty Jane Ransom
Made love three times in a hansom;
But when she begged for more,
A weak voice from the floor
Cried, "the name's Simpson, not Sampson!"

Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess

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May 10, 2012, 10:51:49 AM5/10/12
to
Ha ha! Just because it is based on reality doesn't exclude it from
being a limrick.

--
Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess
"My calculations show that even if God dedicated all of his time
meeting the dead, you would only get to meet him for half of one
second. There are 56 million deaths occurring annually and only 32
million seconds in a year."
-- Darwin Bedford, Ambassador of Reason ("The Pope is Humpty Dumpty")

raven1

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May 10, 2012, 12:06:15 PM5/10/12
to
On Thu, 10 May 2012 07:51:49 -0700, "Fidem Turbare, the non-existent
atheist goddess" <god...@fidemturbare.com> wrote:

>On Thu, 10 May 2012 09:52:18 -0400
>raven1 <quotht...@nevermore.com> wrote:
>> On Wed, 09 May 2012 20:25:59 -0700, kni...@baawa.com wrote:
>>
>> >Arrrrrrrr...
>> >
>> >The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
>> >The dirty little shitter.
>> >He lined his arse with broken glass
>> > and circumcised the Skipper.
>> >
>> >Arrrrrrrr...
>>
>> That's not a limerick.
>
>Ha ha! Just because it is based on reality doesn't exclude it from
>being a limrick.

Not being in the form of a limerick does.



Mike Lovell

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May 10, 2012, 1:13:15 PM5/10/12
to
On 2012-05-10, Alex W. <ing...@yahoo.co.uk> wrote:
> A plumber by the side of a tree
> Was plumbing his girl with great glee.
> Said the girl, "Stop your plumbing"
> "There's somebody coming."
> Said the plumber still plumbing, "It's me!"
>
>
> A young Catholic layman named Fox
> Makes his living by sucking off cocks
> In fits of depression
> He goes to confession
> And jacks off the priest in the box.

^
|_____ Very apt!

Mike Painter

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May 10, 2012, 2:03:03 PM5/10/12
to
There once was a lady from Madras,
Who had a very fine ass.
Not round and pink as you may think,
but was gray, ate grass,and very long ears.

Roses are red,
violets are blue,
I'd be a great poet,
but I never can seem to come up with the last line and never seen to be
able to even end the sentence which may or may not be the last sentence
in the poem and I can't even think about writing a poem with orange in it.

Christopher A. Lee

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May 10, 2012, 2:10:15 PM5/10/12
to
On Thu, 10 May 2012 11:03:03 -0700, Mike Painter
<md.pa...@sbcglobal.net> wrote:


>Roses are red,
>violets are blue,
>I'd be a great poet,
>but I never can seem to come up with the last line and never seen to be
>able to even end the sentence which may or may not be the last sentence
>in the poem and I can't even think about writing a poem with orange in it.

Rose's are red,
Violet's are blue.
Mary's are white,
How about you?

Sla#s

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May 10, 2012, 5:22:21 PM5/10/12
to
My three favourites

There was a young girl from Madras
Who had a beautiful ass
Not smooth and pink as you probably think
But was grey, had long ears and ate grass.

A pansy who lived in Khartoum
Took a lesbian up to his room
They argued all night over who had the right
To do what, with which and to whom.

There was a young girl who begat
Three sons, Nat, Pat and Tat
Twas fun in the breeding but hell in the feeding
For you see there was no tit for Tat.


Slatts


Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess

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May 10, 2012, 7:13:44 PM5/10/12
to
On Thu, 10 May 2012 12:06:15 -0400
raven1 <quotht...@nevermore.com> wrote:
> On Thu, 10 May 2012 07:51:49 -0700, "Fidem Turbare, the non-existent
> atheist goddess" <god...@fidemturbare.com> wrote:
> >On Thu, 10 May 2012 09:52:18 -0400
> >raven1 <quotht...@nevermore.com> wrote:
> >> On Wed, 09 May 2012 20:25:59 -0700, kni...@baawa.com wrote:
> >>
> >> >Arrrrrrrr...
> >> >
> >> >The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
> >> >The dirty little shitter.
> >> >He lined his arse with broken glass
> >> > and circumcised the Skipper.
> >> >
> >> >Arrrrrrrr...
> >>
> >> That's not a limerick.
> >
> >Ha ha! Just because it is based on reality doesn't exclude it from
> >being a limrick.
>
> Not being in the form of a limerick does.

Yes, that's correct.

--
Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess
"... Imagine there's no countries ... And no religion too ..."
-- John Lennon ("Imagine")

Don Martin

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May 10, 2012, 8:52:45 PM5/10/12
to
On Thu, 10 May 2012 07:51:49 -0700, "Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist
goddess" <god...@fidemturbare.com> wrote:

>On Thu, 10 May 2012 09:52:18 -0400
>raven1 <quotht...@nevermore.com> wrote:
>> On Wed, 09 May 2012 20:25:59 -0700, kni...@baawa.com wrote:
>>
>> >Arrrrrrrr...
>> >
>> >The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
>> >The dirty little shitter.
>> >He lined his arse with broken glass
>> > and circumcised the Skipper.
>> >
>> >Arrrrrrrr...
>>
>> That's not a limerick.
>
>Ha ha! Just because it is based on reality doesn't exclude it from
>being a limrick.

Sorry, but the limerick has a strict rhyme and meter scheme: five lines, with
1, 2, and 5 having three feet and rhyming; lines 3 and 4 have two feet and a
different rhyme. The above specimen has only four lines, with only the second
line rhyming with the fourth.

Don Martin

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May 10, 2012, 8:52:45 PM5/10/12
to
Both. It is a double.

Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess

unread,
May 10, 2012, 9:13:13 PM5/10/12
to
On Thu, 10 May 2012 20:52:45 -0400
Don Martin <drdon...@comcast.net> wrote:
> On Thu, 10 May 2012 07:51:49 -0700, "Fidem Turbare, the non-existent
> atheist goddess" <god...@fidemturbare.com> wrote:
> >On Thu, 10 May 2012 09:52:18 -0400
> >raven1 <quotht...@nevermore.com> wrote:
> >> On Wed, 09 May 2012 20:25:59 -0700, kni...@baawa.com wrote:
> >>
> >> >Arrrrrrrr...
> >> >
> >> >The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
> >> >The dirty little shitter.
> >> >He lined his arse with broken glass
> >> > and circumcised the Skipper.
> >> >
> >> >Arrrrrrrr...
> >>
> >> That's not a limerick.
> >
> >Ha ha! Just because it is based on reality doesn't exclude it from
> >being a limrick.
>
> Sorry, but the limerick has a strict rhyme and meter scheme: five
> lines, with 1, 2, and 5 having three feet and rhyming; lines 3 and 4
> have two feet and a different rhyme. The above specimen has only
> four lines, with only the second line rhyming with the fourth.

Thanks! It's helpful to have the clarification.

--
Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess
"You teach a child to read and he or her will be able to pass a
literacy test."
-- George Bush Jr. (February 21, 2001)

Doc Smartass

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May 10, 2012, 10:38:23 PM5/10/12
to
Mike Lovell <mike....@null.local> wrote in
news:slrnjqmkt9.9r...@usenet.home.b0h0.com:

> On 2012-05-10, kni...@baawa.com <kni...@baawa.com> wrote:
>> Arrrrrrrr...
>>
>> The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
>> The dirty little shitter.
>> He lined his arse with broken glass
>> and circumcised the Skipper.
>>
>> Arrrrrrrr...
>
> Isn't that (although slightly modified) from Frggin' in the Riggin'?
>
> "It was on the good ship Venus
> By Christ, you should've seen us
> The figurehead was a whore in bed
> And the mast was a mammoth penis"

Sounds like the "Columbo" cadence we did in Basic:

In eighteen hundred and ninety four,
in the streets of old Bigotti.
There lived a young Italian lad,
selling hot tomalies.
He said the world was round-o,
he said it could be found-o.
The hypothetical, navigatin', son-of-a-bitch Columbo.

The queen she gave him three tall ships,
they all were triple deckers.
The queen she waved her handkerchief,
Columbo waved his pecker
He said the the world was round-o,
he said it could be found-o.
That hypothetical, navigatin', son-of-a-bitch Columbo.

His first mate was a cabin boy,
a dirty little nipper.
They lined his bunk with broken glass,
and circumcised the skipper.
He said the world was round-o,
he said it could be found-o.
That hypothetical, navigatin', son-of-a-bitch Columbo.

--
Doc Smartass, BAAWA Knight of Heckling aa # 1939

Kooks! http://kookclearinghouse.blogspot.com/

Books! http://jw-bookblog.blogspot.com/

Proud to be everything the right wing hates.

Mike Lovell

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May 10, 2012, 10:46:18 PM5/10/12
to
On 2012-05-11, Doc Smartass <Fortbr...@yahoobrick.com> wrote:
> Sounds like the "Columbo" cadence we did in Basic:
>
> In eighteen hundred and ninety four,
> in the streets of old Bigotti.
> There lived a young Italian lad,
> selling hot tomalies.
> He said the world was round-o,
> he said it could be found-o.
> The hypothetical, navigatin', son-of-a-bitch Columbo.
>
> The queen she gave him three tall ships,
> they all were triple deckers.
> The queen she waved her handkerchief,
> Columbo waved his pecker
> He said the the world was round-o,
> he said it could be found-o.
> That hypothetical, navigatin', son-of-a-bitch Columbo.
>
> His first mate was a cabin boy,
> a dirty little nipper.
> They lined his bunk with broken glass,
> and circumcised the skipper.
> He said the world was round-o,
> he said it could be found-o.
> That hypothetical, navigatin', son-of-a-bitch Columbo.

Not bad, could be a lot ruder though! :-)

John Baker

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May 11, 2012, 4:28:39 AM5/11/12
to
On Thu, 10 May 2012 20:52:45 -0400, Don Martin
<drdon...@comcast.net> wrote:

>On Thu, 10 May 2012 07:51:49 -0700, "Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist
>goddess" <god...@fidemturbare.com> wrote:
>
>>On Thu, 10 May 2012 09:52:18 -0400
>>raven1 <quotht...@nevermore.com> wrote:
>>> On Wed, 09 May 2012 20:25:59 -0700, kni...@baawa.com wrote:
>>>
>>> >Arrrrrrrr...
>>> >
>>> >The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
>>> >The dirty little shitter.
>>> >He lined his arse with broken glass
>>> > and circumcised the Skipper.
>>> >
>>> >Arrrrrrrr...
>>>
>>> That's not a limerick.
>>
>>Ha ha! Just because it is based on reality doesn't exclude it from
>>being a limrick.
>
>Sorry, but the limerick has a strict rhyme and meter scheme: five lines, with
>1, 2, and 5 having three feet and rhyming; lines 3 and 4 have two feet and a
>different rhyme. The above specimen has only four lines, with only the second
>line rhyming with the fourth.


There once was a lady named Alice
Who used a dynamite stick for a phallus
They found her vagina
In North Carolina
And her ass on a lamppost in Dallas




Don Martin

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May 11, 2012, 5:22:41 AM5/11/12
to
The second line doesn't scan--one too many syllables. Try

A sprightly young lady named Alice
Tried a dynamite stick for a phallus: . . .

chibiabos

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May 11, 2012, 9:21:30 AM5/11/12
to
In article <l11oq7draoff6a1j9...@4ax.com>, Christopher A.
I see what you did there.

Has that line ever really worked?

-chib

--
Member of S.M.A.S.H.
Sarcastic Middle-aged Atheists with a Sense of Humor

Christopher A. Lee

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May 11, 2012, 9:51:30 AM5/11/12
to
On Fri, 11 May 2012 06:21:30 -0700, chibiabos <ch...@nospam.com> wrote:

>In article <l11oq7draoff6a1j9...@4ax.com>, Christopher A.
>Lee <ca...@optonline.net> wrote:
>
>> On Thu, 10 May 2012 11:03:03 -0700, Mike Painter
>> <md.pa...@sbcglobal.net> wrote:
>>
>>
>> >Roses are red,
>> >violets are blue,
>> >I'd be a great poet,
>> >but I never can seem to come up with the last line and never seen to be
>> >able to even end the sentence which may or may not be the last sentence
>> >in the poem and I can't even think about writing a poem with orange in it.
>>
>> Rose's are red,
>> Violet's are blue.
>> Mary's are white,
>> How about you?
>
>I see what you did there.
>
>Has that line ever really worked?

I'm a frayed knot.

Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess

unread,
May 11, 2012, 11:25:36 AM5/11/12
to
On Fri, 11 May 2012 06:51:30 -0700
Christopher A. Lee <ca...@optonline.net> wrote:
> On Fri, 11 May 2012 06:21:30 -0700, chibiabos <ch...@nospam.com> wrote:
> >In article <l11oq7draoff6a1j9...@4ax.com>, Christopher
> >A. Lee <ca...@optonline.net> wrote:
> >> On Thu, 10 May 2012 11:03:03 -0700, Mike Painter
> >> <md.pa...@sbcglobal.net> wrote:
> >>
> >> >Roses are red,
> >> >violets are blue,
> >> >I'd be a great poet,
> >> >but I never can seem to come up with the last line and never seen
> >> >to be able to even end the sentence which may or may not be the
> >> >last sentence in the poem and I can't even think about writing a
> >> >poem with orange in it.
> >>
> >> Rose's are red,
> >> Violet's are blue.
> >> Mary's are white,
> >> How about you?
> >
> >I see what you did there.
> >
> >Has that line ever really worked?
>
> I'm a frayed knot.

You may need a Robe Axe; A Set of poetic verse can really tie things up.

--
Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess
"The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education."
-- Dr. Albert Einstein

sbalneav

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May 11, 2012, 2:05:47 PM5/11/12
to
kni...@baawa.com wrote:
> Arrrrrrrr...
>
> The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
> The dirty little shitter.
> He lined his arse with broken glass
> and circumcised the Skipper.
>
> Arrrrrrrr...
>
> Wrlord Steve
> BAAWA

It's not the cough that carries you off,
it's the coffin they carry you off in.

Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess

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May 11, 2012, 2:47:47 PM5/11/12
to
This whole thread is spectacular,
because of the awesome vernacular.

--
Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess
"I walked into a Catholic church;
its sign was rather queer:
While we paint, you must receive
Communion in the rear."
-- Dr. Don Martin (March 2, 2012)

Fidem Turbare, the non-existent atheist goddess

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May 11, 2012, 2:46:29 PM5/11/12
to
On Fri, 11 May 2012 18:05:47 +0000 (UTC)
sbalneav <sbal...@alburg.net> wrote:

Doc Smartass

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May 11, 2012, 6:54:15 PM5/11/12
to
Mike Lovell <mike....@null.local> wrote in
news:slrnjqovbq.ni...@usenet.home.b0h0.com:

> On 2012-05-11, Doc Smartass <Fortbr...@yahoobrick.com> wrote:
>> Sounds like the "Columbo" cadence we did in Basic:
>>
>> In eighteen hundred and ninety four,
>> in the streets of old Bigotti.
>> There lived a young Italian lad,
>> selling hot tomalies.
>> He said the world was round-o,
>> he said it could be found-o.
>> The hypothetical, navigatin', son-of-a-bitch Columbo.
>>
>> The queen she gave him three tall ships,
>> they all were triple deckers.
>> The queen she waved her handkerchief,
>> Columbo waved his pecker
>> He said the the world was round-o,
>> he said it could be found-o.
>> That hypothetical, navigatin', son-of-a-bitch Columbo.
>>
>> His first mate was a cabin boy,
>> a dirty little nipper.
>> They lined his bunk with broken glass,
>> and circumcised the skipper.
>> He said the world was round-o,
>> he said it could be found-o.
>> That hypothetical, navigatin', son-of-a-bitch Columbo.
>
> Not bad, could be a lot ruder though! :-)

That was the "nice" one--the one we learned was a lot more fun!

Fun and forbidden--our DI taught it on the sly, when we were out on a PT
run.

Doc Smartass

unread,
May 12, 2012, 4:44:51 AM5/12/12
to
Don Martin <drdon...@comcast.net> wrote in
news:649778813358420339.68055...@news20.forteinc.com
:
I started to write a new Lim'rick,
The rhyming and rhythm no big trick
I put this line here
Then put this one here
And that's how I builded this Lim'rick!

Joe Bruno

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May 12, 2012, 5:11:26 AM5/12/12
to
On Wednesday, May 9, 2012 8:25:59 PM UTC-7, (unknown) wrote:
> Arrrrrrrr...
>
> The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
> The dirty little shitter.
> He lined his arse with broken glass
> and circumcised the Skipper.
>
> Arrrrrrrr...
>
> Wrlord Steve
> BAAWA

My Grandfather used to say:"Too bad they only make muzzles for dogs".
He was talking about people like you.

Joe Bruno

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May 12, 2012, 5:15:57 AM5/12/12
to
On Thursday, May 10, 2012 6:24:53 AM UTC-7, Andy W wrote:
> On May 10, 4:25 am, kni...@baawa.com wrote:
> > Arrrrrrrr...
> >
> > The Cabin Boy, the Cabin Boy.
> > The dirty little shitter.
> > He lined his arse with broken glass
> >  and circumcised the Skipper.
> >
> > Arrrrrrrr...
> >
> > Wrlord Steve
> > BAAWA
>
> I hate to be picky but that isn't a limerick.
>
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry)
>
> Andy

The "warlord" is not the brightest bulb in the lamp.
He confuses obscenity with intellect and equates
vulgarity with courage.

Joe Bruno

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May 12, 2012, 5:22:30 AM5/12/12
to
There was a young lady from Nizes
with tits of 2 different sizes
One was so small
It was no good at all
The other was huge and won prizes.


There was a young fellow named Dave
Who kept a dead whore in a cave
He said:"I know there's no class
In screwing dead ass
But think of the money I save."

Don Martin

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May 12, 2012, 9:33:23 AM5/12/12
to
On Sat, 12 May 2012 03:44:51 -0500, Doc Smartass <Fortbr...@yahoobrick.com>
wrote:
This falls into the Edmond Lear dodge of merely repeating words instead of
finding rhymes for them. Sure, a dirty old man such as yourself knows a few
vulgar rhymes?

Hie thee to a men's room!
(Or, if you want clever, the ladies' room.)

walksalone

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May 12, 2012, 9:49:24 AM5/12/12
to
Don Martin <drdon...@comcast.net> wrote in
news:ptmsq71vu50cplcq9...@4ax.com:

> On Sat, 12 May 2012 03:44:51 -0500, Doc Smartass
> <Fortbr...@yahoobrick.com> wrote:
>
>>Don Martin <drdon...@comcast.net> wrote in
>>news:649778813358420339.68055...@news20.forteinc.c
>>om
>>:
>>
>>> John Baker <nu...@bizniz.net> wrote:
>>>> On Thu, 10 May 2012 20:52:45 -0400, Don Martin
>>>> <drdon...@comcast.net> wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> On Thu, 10 May 2012 07:51:49 -0700, "Fidem Turbare, the
>>>>> non-existent atheist goddess" <god...@fidemturbare.com> wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>>> On Thu, 10 May 2012 09:52:18 -0400
>>>>>> raven1 <quotht...@nevermore.com> wrote:
>>>>>>> On Wed, 09 May 2012 20:25:59 -0700, kni...@baawa.com wrote:

snip, naturally.

>>>
>>> The second line doesn't scan--one too many syllables. Try
>>>
>>> A sprightly young lady named Alice
>>> Tried a dynamite stick for a phallus: . . .
>>
>>I started to write a new Lim'rick,
>>The rhyming and rhythm no big trick
>>I put this line here
>>Then put this one here
>>And that's how I builded this Lim'rick!
>
> This falls into the Edmond Lear dodge of merely repeating words
> instead of finding rhymes for them. Sure, a dirty old man such as
> yourself knows a few vulgar rhymes?
>
> Hie thee to a men's room!
> (Or, if you want clever, the ladies' room.)

Never been invited to the ladies room myself. But limericks, I'm aware of
a few.

there was a fat man from Boston
who bought himself an Austin
Just enough room for his fat ass
and a botlle of gas
his balls hung out & he lost 'em

or

The limerick is furtive and mean
You must keep her in close quarantine
Or she sneaks to the slums
And promptly becomes
Disorderly, drunk and obscene

then again

There was a young lady named Rose
Who had a large wart on her nose.
When she had it removed
Her appearance improved,
But her glasses slipped down to her toes

walksalone who may not have a sense of humor, but can appreciate the effort
put into a good limerick.

"It isn't faith that makes good science,
Mr. Klaatu. It is curiosity."
Professor Barnhardt - The Day The Earth Stood Still

Don Martin

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May 12, 2012, 12:07:02 PM5/12/12
to
On Sat, 12 May 2012 13:49:24 +0000 (UTC), walksalone <spams...@nerdshack.com>
wrote:

>Don Martin <drdon...@comcast.net> wrote in
>news:ptmsq71vu50cplcq9...@4ax.com:
>
More snip.

>>
>> This falls into the Edmond Lear dodge of merely repeating words
>> instead of finding rhymes for them. Sure, a dirty old man such as
>> yourself knows a few vulgar rhymes?
>>
>> Hie thee to a men's room!
>> (Or, if you want clever, the ladies' room.)
>
>Never been invited to the ladies room myself. But limericks, I'm aware of
>a few.
>
>there was a fat man from Boston
>who bought himself an Austin
>Just enough room for his fat ass
>and a botlle of gas
>his balls hung out & he lost 'em
>
>or
>
>The limerick is furtive and mean
>You must keep her in close quarantine
>Or she sneaks to the slums
>And promptly becomes
>Disorderly, drunk and obscene
>
>then again
>
>There was a young lady named Rose
>Who had a large wart on her nose.
> When she had it removed
> Her appearance improved,
>But her glasses slipped down to her toes

The beasties you see when you travel
Will puzzle your mind to unravel:
Which is fox, which is hare
Which wolverine, moose, or bear
Strewn in the median's gravel.

Doc Smartass

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May 12, 2012, 7:46:31 PM5/12/12
to
Don Martin <drdon...@comcast.net> wrote in
news:ptmsq71vu50cplcq9...@4ax.com:
Coulda done it, but my brain thing was in snark mode :)

...besides, I couldn't find my rhyming dictionary =D

>
> Hie thee to a men's room!
> (Or, if you want clever, the ladies' room.)

Seen on woman's t-shirt: "You're a bad boy. Go to my room."

Doc Smartass

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May 14, 2012, 8:36:44 PM5/14/12
to
Joe Bruno <atjoe...@gmail.com> wrote in
news:16005304.301.1336813886166.JavaMail.geo-discussion-forums@ynll26:

> My G<swack>

Shaddap, cur.

Doc Smartass

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May 14, 2012, 8:37:28 PM5/14/12
to
Joe Bruno <atjoe...@gmail.com> wrote in
news:31816707.23.1336814157988.JavaMail.geo-discussion-forums@ynz24:

> T<strip>

You said nothing.

Doc Smartass

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May 14, 2012, 8:49:51 PM5/14/12
to
Joe Bruno <atjoe...@gmail.com> wrote in
news:20082145.268.1336814550827.JavaMail.geo-discussion-forums@ynej5:

> T

Joey Bruno is a schlub,
A stupid, mindless blot.
Of brains he has a little nub:
His parents drowned him in a tub
Too dumb to die, the clot.

antonys...@gmail.com

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Apr 24, 2019, 5:26:01 PM4/24/19
to
Here I sit in smelly vapor.
Someone stole the toilet paper.
Should I sit here and let it linger?
Fuck it man, I’ll use my finger!

Kevrob

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Apr 24, 2019, 5:57:56 PM4/24/19
to
An old graffito that I found funny the first time I
reads it on the bathroom wall.

It is NOT in limerick form, though.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry)

--
Kevin R
a.a #2310
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