Re: Valentine's Day Challenge!!!

[Gwyneth]

On 04/02/13 23:31, qwerty...@gmail.com wrote:
> Ok poets, draw your swords and sharpen your pencils (and your wits), a challenge presents itself!!!!
>
> Valentine's day approaches. This is the time we wax poetic about cupid's general disregard for our personal best interests. Here is the challenge:
>
> 1. Write a poem. (any form is acceptable, minimum length of 10 lines)
> 2. The poem MUST be about love and include the word love somewhere in it.

This rule bothers me.

I'm on record as saying I think all poetry is love poetry, but I tend to
include 'love' on the forbidden words list along with 'soul', 'tendril',
'shard', 'myriad' etc.

That said, a challenge is a challenge and you've brightened up my
newsgroup reading this week so I shall post a piece which may or may not
conform to your rules. It'll go in a new thread.


g.

> 3. There cannot be a single cliche. Not one.
> 4 The poem must be posted here. Either as a response to this thread or as a new thread but with a reference to this one in it.
> 5. The poem must be submitted by 02/13/2013 for credit
> 6. Multiple entries are accepted.
>
> The winner, chosen by votes, receives a $10 gift certificate to the wonderful Cheesecake factory.
>
> Have fun!!!
>
> Regards
> -H
>

[George Dance]

On Monday, February 4, 2013 6:31:56 PM UTC-5, qwerty...@gmail.com wrote:
> Ok poets, draw your swords and sharpen your pencils (and your wits), a challenge presents itself!!!!
>
> Valentine's day approaches. This is the time we wax poetic about cupid's general disregard for our personal best interests. Here is the challenge:
>
> 1. Write a poem. (any form is acceptable, minimum length of 10 lines)
> 2. The poem MUST be about love and include the word love somewhere in it.

> 3. There cannot be a single cliche. Not one.
> 4 The poem must be posted here. Either as a response to this thread or as a new thread but with a reference to this one in it.
> 5. The poem must be submitted by 02/13/2013 for credit
> 6. Multiple entries are accepted.
>
> The winner, chosen by votes, receives a $10 gift certificate to the wonderful Cheesecake factory.
>
> Have fun!!!
>
> Regards
>
> -H

I have no interest in writing something new for this or any other "challenge", but I note that you have no rule stating that it/they must be new. So I'll post a couple of things I've previously posted, dealing with Feb. and love, and you can decide whether or not they're eligible. On different threads, of course; no sense burying poetry way down here, where it will never be seen again.

[Will Dockery]

On Tuesday, February 5, 2013 5:26:55 PM UTC-5, Gwyneth wrote:
> On 04/02/13 23:31, qwerty...@gmail.com wrote:
>
> > Ok poets, draw your swords and sharpen your pencils (and your wits), a challenge presents itself!!!!
>
> >
>
> > Valentine's day approaches. This is the time we wax poetic about cupid's general disregard for our personal best interests. Here is the challenge:
>
> >
>
> > 1. Write a poem. (any form is acceptable, minimum length of 10 lines)
>
> > 2. The poem MUST be about love and include the word love somewhere in it.
>
> This rule bothers me.
>
> I'm on record as saying I think all poetry is love poetry, but I tend to
>
> include 'love' on the forbidden words list along with 'soul', 'tendril',
>
> 'shard', 'myriad' etc.

Interestingly, this is where I was halted, as well.

Almost everything I write is about "love" but I rarely use the word.

"...Freud begins from the fact that in our modalities of the love relation certain patterns, stereotypes or cliches occur that repeat themselves continually throughout [...] As for cliche, there is the argument that cliches, as Freud said, are the profoundest form of communication -that's why they become cliches- but sometimes these platitudes can seem spiteful..."

(Read more here: The Fundamentals of Psychoanalytic Technique - Page 86 - Google Books Result
books.google.com/books?isbn=185575455X

R. Horacio Etchegoyen - 2006 - Medical
In this chapter we deal with "The Dynamics of Transference", which Freud wrote ... stereotypes or cliches, which we all have and which arise as the result of the...)

But I'm going to give it a shot, at least as Gwyneth has done, to rework an old one an try to cut out any of the profound truths, aka cliches... because:

"The winner, chosen by votes, receives a $10 gift certificate to the wonderful Cheesecake factory."

It would be swell to go there for coffee, they have great coffee at the wonderful Cheesecake factory.

[Will Dockery]

I'll be posting an older one or two, reworked a bit in an attempt to clip out the most obvious cliches, and I note that Gwyneth did this as well, so it seems acceptable.

But, H., will posting an older poem still keep us in the running for:

"The winner, chosen by votes, receives a $10 gift certificate to the wonderful Cheesecake factory"?

[Will Dockery]

On Thursday, February 7, 2013 5:17:28 AM UTC-5, qwerty...@gmail.com wrote:

> On Wednesday, February 6, 2013 10:19:59 PM UTC-5, Will Dockery wrote:
>> On Wednesday, February 6, 2013 7:08:36 PM UTC-5, George Dance wrote:
> > > On Monday, February 4, 2013 6:31:56 PM UTC-5, qwerty...@gmail.com wrote:
>
> > > > Ok poets, draw your swords and sharpen your pencils (and your wits), a challenge presents itself!!!!
>
> > > > Valentine's day approaches. This is the time we wax poetic about cupid's general disregard for our personal best interests. Here is the challenge:
>
> > > > 1. Write a poem. (any form is acceptable, minimum length of 10 lines)
>
> > > > 2. The poem MUST be about love and include the word love somewhere in it.
>
> > > > 3. There cannot be a single cliche. Not one.
>
> > > > 4 The poem must be posted here. Either as a response to this thread or as a new thread but with a reference to this one in it.
>
> > > > 5. The poem must be submitted by 02/13/2013 for credit
>
> > > > 6. Multiple entries are accepted.
>
> > > > The winner, chosen by votes, receives a $10 gift certificate to the wonderful Cheesecake factory.
>
> > > > Have fun!!!
>

> > > I have no interest in writing something new for this or any other "challenge", but I note that you have no rule stating that it/they must be new. So I'll post a couple of things I've previously posted, dealing with Feb. and love, and you can decide whether or not they're eligible. On different threads, of course; no sense burying poetry way down here, where it will never be seen again.
>
> > I'll be posting an older one or two, reworked a bit in an attempt to clip out the most obvious cliches, and I note that Gwyneth did this as well, so it seems acceptable.
>
> > But, H., will posting an older poem still keep us in the running for:
>
> > "The winner, chosen by votes, receives a $10 gift certificate to the wonderful Cheesecake factory"?
>

> The poem does not need to be a new one necessarily, but it does need to mee the simple criteria I have set for th to be considered.
>
> Good luck Will.

I like getting into these "challenges" more and more as time passes, and we haven't had any since Karla made her exit, and am putting one together, basically write the poem and chop out the cliches while adding a gratuitous "Love" at some point... heh.


--
Over You / Will Dockery & The Shadowville All-Stars
http://youtu.be/4rvCp_xzWH8


--
Over You / Will Dockery & The Shadowville All-Stars
http://youtu.be/4rvCp_xzWH8

[George Dance]

On Wednesday, February 6, 2013 10:16:10 PM UTC-5, Will Dockery wrote:
> On Tuesday, February 5, 2013 5:26:55 PM UTC-5, Gwyneth wrote:
>
> > On 04/02/13 23:31, qwerty...@gmail.com wrote:
>
> > > Ok poets, draw your swords and sharpen your pencils (and your wits), a challenge presents itself!!!!
>
> > > Valentine's day approaches. This is the time we wax poetic about cupid's general disregard for our personal best interests. Here is the challenge:
>
> > > 1. Write a poem. (any form is acceptable, minimum length of 10 lines)
>
> > > 2. The poem MUST be about love and include the word love somewhere in it.
>
> > This rule bothers me.
>
> > I'm on record as saying I think all poetry is love poetry, but I tend to
> > include 'love' on the forbidden words list along with 'soul', 'tendril',
> > 'shard', 'myriad' etc.
>
> Interestingly, this is where I was halted, as well.
>
> Almost everything I write is about "love" but I rarely use the word.
>

[Freud quote removed)

> But I'm going to give it a shot, at least as Gwyneth has done, to rework an old one an try to cut out any of the profound truths, aka cliches... because:
>

I'm sure the reason you were halted, though similar, was not the same. For modernists, like PJ and all his Pisswits, love is literally a forbidden word: a poet is not allowed to use it -- just like the words "heart and "soul", e.g. -- and any poem that contains it is for that reason a bad poem: just as with "heart and soul" poetry. There are other forbidden words: "peace" and "beauty" come to mind.

[Chuck Lysaght]

I love cheesecake. It's good for the soul. Peace.

[Hieronymous House]

On Saturday, February 9, 2013 10:28:00 AM UTC-5, Chuck Lysaght wrote:
> I love cheesecake. It's good for the soul. Peace.

Speaking of peace, I love a piece of
ass because it feels good on my dick.
All I get is stinky wolf pussy though.
Some are just better off than others.
That's just the way it is, cheesecake.

[Will Dockery]

There's also questions of what poetry gets into the contest, is that "by vote" or just on Horatio's whim?

For example, H's own choice for the contest was said by one critic as being cliched, obe of the absolute no-nos in the contest:

"Ok, enough for me. 'fields of cloud' -- gawd! Actually 'ride dragon's breath into the sky' is not bad, but the preceeding image of 'rising like mists'(which is a horrid cliche), dilutes its impact to nothing." -Chandra P. Das

This is important, I reckon... who decides and declare definitively where a cliche is present? I suppose since you've submitted this poem to your own challenge you don't agree with Chandra here?

If there is to be a vote, will this have to be voted on, as well?

Seems to be a valid question.

[George Dance]

On Feb 7, 5:19 am, qwertyh123...@gmail.com wrote:
> On Wednesday, February 6, 2013 7:08:36 PM UTC-5, George Dance wrote:

> ok, just make sure to refer back to the challenge in the thread's title if you wish to be considered for entry.  (see rule #4)
>
> Regards
> -H

Fair enough. I'll include both the name in that post, and a link from
here.

Speaking of which, here's one from ==z== which qualifies:
https://groups.google.com/group/alt.arts.poetry.comments/msg/05c673a2c819c7f7?hl=en

I'll do the same for any others I see (iff the writers want to be in
the challenge, of course).

Going over the rules again, I see that "Winter Love" is 2 lines short
- and I don't want to revise it, as it works just fine as it is - so
I'll leave it and substitute something else.

[Will Dockery]

Maybe add a quote to the start of it?

[Chuck Lysaght]

Poor Pete. Always whining.

[Hieronymous House]

Chuck Lysaght
Poor Pete. Always whining.

Rich Ann. Well paid trolling.

[Will Dockery]

On Sunday, February 10, 2013 12:40:31 AM UTC-5, Peter J Ross wrote:
>
> > I'm sure the reason you were halted, though similar, was not the
>
> > same. For modernists, like PJ and all his Pisswits, love is
>
> > literally a forbidden word: a poet is not allowed to use it -- just
>
> > like the words "heart and "soul", e.g. -- and any poem that contains
>
> > it is for that reason a bad poem: just as with "heart and soul"
>
> > poetry. There are other forbidden words: "peace" and "beauty" come
>
> > to mind.
>
>
>

> It's good to see Dunce attributing opinions to me that I've always
>
> disagreed with. It's what he does best.

So PJR is a heart & soul man after all..?

[George Dance]

On Feb 10, 12:40 am, Peter J Ross <p...@example.invalid> wrote:
> In alt.arts.poetry.comments on Sat, 9 Feb 2013 07:21:20 -0800 (PST),

>
> George Dance <georgedanc...@yahoo.ca> wrote:
>
>
>
> > I'm sure the reason you were halted, though similar, was not the
> > same. For modernists, like PJ and all his Pisswits, love is
> > literally a forbidden word: a poet is not allowed to use it -- just
> > like the words "heart and "soul", e.g. -- and any poem that contains
> > it is for that reason a bad poem: just as with "heart and soul"
> > poetry. There are other forbidden words: "peace" and "beauty" come
> > to mind.
>

> It's good to see Dunce attributing opinions to me

and all your "Pisswits" (like the one whose quote you just snipped
out)

> that I've always
> disagreed with.

"We don't see as many ~heart-n-soul~ poets on Usenet as we used to a
few years ago, and if I've contributed to driving them away, I'm not
ashamed." - ~PJ~ Ross

Try a different lie.

[Hieronymous House]

On Sunday, February 10, 2013 12:24:28 PM UTC-5, George Dance wrote:

> Try a different lie.

Would you believe I hit
the frickin' lottery!?!

[Will Dockery]

On Sunday, February 10, 2013 12:24:28 PM UTC-5, George Dance wrote:

PJR: heart & soulster.

Who's a thunk it?

--
Ashes To Justice / Will Dockery & Sandy Madaris
http://www.reverbnation.com/willdockery/song/11851687-ashes-to-justice--will-dockery

[Will Dockery]

On Sunday, February 10, 2013 12:28:12 PM UTC-5, Hieronymous House wrote:
>
> Would you believe I hit
>
> the frickin' lottery!?!

Congratulations!

[Hieronymous House]

I really didn't hit the frickin' lottery, Will. George wrote, "Try a different lie.", so I tried to lie differently. I made asking if you'd believe I'd won the lottery sound like I'd already won the lottery for real, which I didn't, really, but at least now you can't say I didn't at least try a different lie, which I did, obviously, although it may not sound very different from anybody else who'd lie about a thing like that.

[Chuck Lysaght]

Splorf.

[Hieronymous House]

Excuse you.

[pikaki...@gmail.com]

Viewed from any angle
Always seems to be true
Live has never been the same
Ever since I met you
Nevertheless this time
Taking your hands in mine
In the name of the spirits above
Now I pledge to you
Everlasting love

[Will Dockery]

<qwerty...@gmail.com> wrote in message
news:2974bd68-0ceb-477f...@googlegroups.com...

>
> "The winner, chosen by votes, receives a $10 gift certificate to the
> wonderful Cheesecake factory"?
>

> The poem does not need to be a new one necessarily, but it does need to
> mee the simple criteria I have set for th to > be considered.
>
> Good luck Will.

Okay, the poem is filled with love and I think any cliches are /new/ ones,
and is sort of a OB poem to your Aberdeen one, as suggested by our friend
Chandra P. Das, a decade ago:

Miss Alice Crenshaw

Little Victoria
stepped on a bumblebee,
near the sawmill millhouse.

Cousin Maxwell
saw it while sitting in a tree,
on the hill
across from Uncle Grouse.

Near the house of
Bullethead & Shorty...
Always late, never home,
they's a fighting,
they'll get home the best they can.
With some luck and
a Southern wind.

Shorty's chasing Bullethead
with a frying pan
full of chicken bones.

Jerked wire
someone tried to call the cops
on the telephone.

Sort of in the backyard
of the old waterpump house.
Near the canepatch,
Miss Crenshaw's creeping like a mouse.

She said some odd words,
seen them spit right out her mouth.

Everybody's watching television,
or Miss Crenshaw's hipshake.
She's a stroller in technicolor
up and down a dirt avenue
for goodness sake.

If you need a girl
you can converse on love with...
She's a good listener
and she ain't quite loud!
But a looker in a crowd.

On a two stooler bike,
somebody easing down the path.

Near the house of
Bullethead & Shorty...
Working late at the mill again.
Scoop the sugar with cabbage,
wash it down with cold gin.

Never sure when the morning starts
or where it ends.

I recall a bit later,
when she shook her peaches for me.
Shady silver leaf maples,
and a lonesome persimmon tree.

Full moon and hay fever
schoolhouse looking like a Sphinx.
She's a sweetie,
her hair's like a chestnut minx.

Everybody's watching television,
or Miss Crenshaw's hipshake.
She's a stroller
up and down a dirt avenue.

If you need a girl
you can converse on love with...
She's a good listener
and she ain't quite loud!
But a looker in a crowd.

-Will Dockery