All of da family, was ly'in on the flow,
my sister wif her gurlfriend, and my brother wif some hoe.
Ashtrays was all full , empty beer cans and all
when I heared such a fuss, I thunk...."Sh'eet, it
must be da law".
I pulled the sheet off da windoe and what I'ze could see,
I was spectin' the sherrif, wif a warrent fo' me.
But what did I see, made me say, "Laaawd look at dat".
dere was a huge watermelon, pulled by 8 big-ass rats.
Now over all of da years, Santy Claws he be white,
but it looks like us brotha's, got a black un' tonight.
Faster than a poe'lice car, my homeboy he came,
and whupped up on dem rats, as he called dem by name.
On Biden, On Jessie, On Polosi and Hillary Who
On Fannie, On Freddi, On Ayers, and Slick Willy too.
Obama landed dat melon, right there in da street,
I knowed it fo' sho', - can you believe that Sh'eet!.
Dat Santy didn't need no chimney, he picked da lock on my doe,
an I sez to myself, "Son o' bitch...he don did dis befoe!"
He had a big bag, full of presents - at first I suspeck?
Wif "Air Jordans" and fake gold, to wear roun my neck.
But he left me no presents, just started stealin my shit.
He got my guns and my crack, and my new burglers kit.
Den, wif my crap in his bag, out da windoe he flew,
I sho' woulda shanked him, but he snagged my knife too.
He jumped back on dat melon, wif out even a hitch,
and waz gone in two seconds, "democrat son of a bitch."
So nex year I be hopin', a white Santy we git,
'cause a black Santy Claws, just ain't worf a shit.
"everybody be sleepin'"? Why the fuck is it that
people who try to write parodies in AAVE turn
out to be illiterate in AAVE?
Haiku Jones
I'm still trying to figure out why people in AAVE are such
idiots. Let's solve one problem at a time.
Um...actually, "AAVE" is "African-American Vernacular
English", also known as "Black English". No grammatical
speaker of Black English would say "everybody be sleepin'".
in this context, any more than a grammatical speaker
of Standard English would say "everybody sleeps"
in the same phrase.
Haiku Jones
Haiku Jones
********************************
That be like Ebonics ???
Saul Levy
Mix the these two together.
From an Obama Family Picture ???
> From an Obama Family Picture ???
I knew there were implications that he was an alien, but
an aleeun?