Silly shrink
rom...@azstarnet.com
The Interessee <the_int...@pi.net> wrote:
Hi, Group!
I funny thing happened today. I went to see my shrink, and I proudly
told him about my last week experiences in this group, and
specifically those with Johnny, and how he greatly helped me with
things like forgiveness, and how he opened my heart. I really thought
he would be happy for me, but oh no, our Mr. Schmuck's ego couldn't
handle not being able to take the credit for it, and asked me why the
hell I was still coming to him. Does that strike anyone as
particularly odd, or is it just me? F*ck him, anyway! I may have the
perp-mind, thank God I do not have the therp-mind!
A little confused,
Mark, formerly: The Interessee
***************************************************************
Mark,
It is not you at all it is him, he is a f*cking idiot! You were
absolutely write when you said his ego couldn't handle it or why would
he say something stupid like why the h*ll are you comming here. He
should be very happy that you have outside support, unless he wants to
spend 24/7 with you. Actually if there is going to be any "credit"
for your healing the lion share should go to you. You are the one who
is doing all the hard work and he is just there to facilitate that. I
am with you, f*ck him anyway.
Eterna
Buff Lee
seems very odd to me. if i were you, i'd look for another therapist.
at the very least i hope you ask him about his response.
b
On Fri, 4 Apr 1997, The Interessee wrote:
> Hi, Group!
>
> I funny thing happened today. I went to see my shrink, and I proudly
> told him about my last week experiences in this group, and specifically
> those with Johnny, and how he greatly helped me with things like
> forgiveness, and how he opened my heart. I really thought he would be
> happy for me, but oh no, our Mr. Schmuck's ego couldn't handle not being
> able to take the credit for it, and asked me why the hell I was still
> coming to him. Does that strike anyone as particularly odd, or is it
> just me? F*ck him, anyway! I may have the perp-mind, thank God I do not
> have the therp-mind!
>
> A little confused,
>
> - Mark, formerly: The Interessee
>
> ---
> "It is particularly incumbent on those who never change their opinion,
> to be secure of judging properly at first."
>
> [ Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice ]
>
>
Shimon Walner
Hi Mark,
It's really tough to make sense out of therapy relationships via the
Internet.
I guess I'll throw out the jumbled mass of thoughts that come in to my
head all at once:
(1) there are a lot of really _bad_ therapists out there,
(2) when you are in therapy, a lot of old feelings, hurts, motivations,
etc. can be projected on to your therapist, making them *appear* to be a
jerk to you,
(3) if projection happens, it can be a great growth opportunity,
especially when worked through with your therapist (that JERK!)
(4) it's hard to distinguish between a real jerk [bad therapist], and a
good therapist that looks like a jerk because you're projecting stuff
onto them
(5) the best way to tell the difference (IMHO) is to have a discussion
about the fact that you feel like they are behaving like a jerk
(6) if the therapist gets really defensive in response to the
conversation, then they either _are_ not such a good therapist, or they
are not one you can work with.
If pressed, I would suspect that you would benefit from a new therapist,
for several reasons:
(a) this little post [quoted below],
(b) your previous observation that it doesn't feel like he is helping
you,
(c) you seem to have grown in this group already, and the therapist that
you picked before may have been picked before you were ready to do any
really challenging work.
My $.02.
Shimon, professional therapist in another lifetime.
Stephanie Smith
The Interessee (the_int...@pi.net) wrote:
: Hi, Group!
Hi, Mark!
: I funny thing happened today. I went to see my shrink, and I proudly
: told him about my last week experiences in this group, and specifically
: those with Johnny, and how he greatly helped me with things like
: forgiveness, and how he opened my heart. I really thought he would be
: happy for me, but oh no, our Mr. Schmuck's ego couldn't handle not being
: able to take the credit for it, and asked me why the hell I was still
: coming to him. Does that strike anyone as particularly odd, or is it
: just me? F*ck him, anyway! I may have the perp-mind, thank God I do not
: have the therp-mind!
Hmmmmm. Suckerino :-(. From my POV, two possibilities:
1) Your shrink needs a shrink and sucks the big rocks (I'm leaning
towards this one)
2) Your shrink things the newsgroups are a bad idea and isn't telling
that directly or telling why (Kinda a variation on one, if you ask me)
Weren't you thinking about a new therp anyway? Sounds like it could be a
dandy idea :-)
I'm glad you're not buying in :-)
Take care,
Steph
Panther
Or like Shim mentioned.
Or the therp may know Mark better than we do and is challenging
him to stop hiding behind what he may think is a non RW connection.
Some therp can be quite pointed in this regard and relationshipss need to
be worked out in RL countertransference and transfernce face to face
relationships if that is in fact what is happening here. I am not saying
that this is the case here, I have no way of knowing, but it is a
possible consideration. Is Mark avoiding confrontations with his
therapist to his thinking patterns that we as ng members have no way of
knowing. Maybe not be the case, and only Mark and his therpist can know.
If in fact the therapist is reacting as Mark says, than yes a new
therapist is a good decision. If the fault is Mark hiding behind a ng to
avoid interpersonal relationships on a face to face basis, than that is
another story and Mark is not being helped here.
Just a thought and not a dyed in the wool proclamation.
:-) - N
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Stephanie Smith
The Interessee (the_int...@pi.net) wrote:
: Stephanie Smith <st...@cyberenet.net> wrote in article
: <5i22jh$o...@news.cyberenet.net>...
: > The Interessee (the_int...@pi.net) wrote:
: > : Hi, Group!
: >
: > Hi, Mark!
: >
: > : I funny thing happened today. I went to see my shrink, and I proudly
: > : told him about my last week experiences in this group, and specifically
: > : those with Johnny, and how he greatly helped me with things like
: > : forgiveness, and how he opened my heart. I really thought he would be
: > : happy for me, but oh no, our Mr. Schmuck's ego couldn't handle not
: being
: > : able to take the credit for it, and asked me why the hell I was still
: > : coming to him. Does that strike anyone as particularly odd, or is it
: > : just me? F*ck him, anyway! I may have the perp-mind, thank God I do not
: > : have the therp-mind!
: >
: > Hmmmmm. Suckerino :-(. From my POV, two possibilities:
: >
: > 1) Your shrink needs a shrink and sucks the big rocks (I'm leaning
: > towards this one)
: >
: > 2) Your shrink things the newsgroups are a bad idea and isn't telling
: > that directly or telling why (Kinda a variation on one, if you ask me)
: {{{Steph}}}
:
: Hiya, Steph!
Gooooood mourning ;-)
: I am very glad you are with me on this! Your support is duly noted. Kudos
: for Steph! Yes, my therp does not think being here is good for me, because
: you are not RL persons. I am not sure about you, Steph, but I do not need
: visual confirmation to regard people as real.
In the "unreality," I find comfort ... security. All that stuff. In
real life I'm something of a hermit. I can't connect. I hope,
eventually, it will happen. But, not now. Here, I can, sometimes. And
for now, it is enough. Fuck, it had better be, it's all there is.
Or, when I'm not being a hermit, I'm unreal. I started being a hermit
because I got tired of being unreal all the time, so you can imagine how
much help that option it.
Yes, you, and everyone else here, are real to me. I *duck* used to play
mud quite a bit ... Lotsa mud parties. They were pretty cool. Those
people turned out to be real, why wouldn't you turn out the same way?
: It is almost an insult to
: make such a sharp distinction between RL and 'imaginary' newsgroup people:
: it reduces you to a fakeness you do not deserve. What you, and others, have
: done for me the last few weeks, felt very real: your support was real, your
: warmth was real, your compassion was real, and your interest in me was
: real. Perhaps you are indeed unable to physically touch me, but you touched
: me alright!
Make a non-netter understand that and you'll mov the world :-)
: > Weren't you thinking about a new therp anyway? Sounds like it could be a
:
: > dandy idea :-)
:
: What shall I tell my therp then?... Oh, I know, in your words: Waa. :-)
Oh thanks. What do *I* think, in light of the responses I've seen come
in since I wrote this? Maybe you shouldn't do anything rash. Ultimately
it's your decision and all that, blah blah, but IMO Shimon & Noel raised
good points.
Thank g'Hod it's Friday,
Steph, heading off to be unreal at work
Panther
The Interessee wrote:
>
> Panther <ncl...@sover.net> wrote in article <3344D4...@sover.net>...
> > Stephanie Smith wrote:
> > >
> > > The Interessee (the_int...@pi.net) wrote:
> > > : Hi, Group!
> > >
> > > Hi, Mark!
> > >
>
>
> > > Steph
> >
> > Or the therp may know Mark better than we do and is challenging
> > him to stop hiding behind what he may think is a non RW connection.
> be worked out in RL countertransference and transference face to face
> > relationships if that is in fact what is happening here. I am not saying
>
> > that this is the case here, I have no way of knowing, but it is a
> > possible consideration. Is Mark avoiding confrontations with his
> > therapist to his thinking patterns that we as ng members have no way of
> > knowing. Maybe not be the case, and only Mark and his therpist can know.
>
> > If in fact the therapist is reacting as Mark says, than yes a new
> > therapist is a good decision. If the fault is Mark hiding behind a ng to
> > avoid interpersonal relationships on a face to face basis, than that is
> > another story and Mark is not being helped here.
> >
> > Just a thought and not a dyed in the wool proclamation.
> >
> > :-) - N
Mark,
> Hmmm, Panther, somehow I like Steph's response better. I wonder why.
I don't :-)
While you in your ever so supportive way talk about "fault", and "hiding behind a
> ng to avoid interpersonal relationships on a face to face basis," perhaps I
> should take this opportunity to counter some of that negativity of yours.
> If by "hiding" you mean using the safety inherent to the anonymity of the
> InterNet, then I say: yes, guilty as charged.
No this is not what I meant.
>I find it a lot easier to talk about things in here, than on a tête-à-tête basis. What
>of it? And as to whether it helps me, please, let me be the judge of that, will you?
Reread such phrases as: I am not saying that this is the case here, but
it is a possible consideration.
However, I do see one item which may have confused context. Change
"than that is another story and Mark is not being helped here" to
"than that is another story and Mark is not being helped in this
regard". As this was the meaning intended.
>The last time you judged me, I wound up being called the worst person on the
> group. And you are right: I did not feel helped there.
I don't consider anyone on the ng good or bad. I said you were the last person
(or last person on the ng) _I_ would want as a character witness. (under those
circumstances).
- N
>
> With kind regards,
>
> - Mark, formerly: The Interessee
Blain Nelson
commenting through Romana's post because I missed it the first time.
> The Interessee <the_int...@pi.net> wrote:
>
> Hi, Group!
>
Howdy/
> I funny thing happened today. I went to see my shrink, and I proudly
> told him about my last week experiences in this group, and
> specifically those with Johnny, and how he greatly helped me with
> things like forgiveness, and how he opened my heart. I really thought
> he would be happy for me, but oh no, our Mr. Schmuck's ego couldn't
> handle not being able to take the credit for it, and asked me why the
> hell I was still coming to him. Does that strike anyone as
> particularly odd, or is it just me? F*ck him, anyway! I may have the
> perp-mind, thank God I do not have the therp-mind!
>
Did you respond with "I don't know. Why the hell am I still coming to
you?"
Better luck with your next counselor/therapist-person.
> A little confused,
>
> Mark, formerly: The Interessee
Take care,
Blain
Denny
Mark, there ARE a few good therps out there--unfortunately, though, not to
many! If you have a choice, see if you can get someone else.
If not, take what this one says with a grain of salt!
:-)
In article <334498...@pi.net>, the_int...@pi.net wrote:
> Hi, Group!
>
> I funny thing happened today. I went to see my shrink, and I proudly
> told him about my last week experiences in this group, and specifically
> those with Johnny, and how he greatly helped me with things like
> forgiveness, and how he opened my heart. I really thought he would be
> happy for me, but oh no, our Mr. Schmuck's ego couldn't handle not being
> able to take the credit for it, and asked me why the hell I was still
> coming to him. Does that strike anyone as particularly odd, or is it
> just me? F*ck him, anyway! I may have the perp-mind, thank God I do not
> have the therp-mind!
>
> A little confused,
>
> - Mark, formerly: The Interessee
>
> ---
> "It is particularly incumbent on those who never change their opinion,
> to be secure of judging properly at first."
>
> [ Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice ]
IUL,
--->Denny
Progressive Life Awareness Network (PLAN):
http://www.awareness.net
*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#*#
Male Intergenerational Relationship Support Org. (MIRSO)
http://www.denny.org/mirso.html
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"Far better it is to dare mighty things, than to take rank with those poor,
timid spirits who know neither victory nor defeat." - Theodore Roosevelt
a writer of sorts
In article <334498...@pi.net>, The Interessee <the_int...@pi.net> wrote:
> Hi, Group!
>
> I funny thing happened today. I went to see my shrink, and I proudly
> told him about my last week experiences in this group, and specifically
> those with Johnny, and how he greatly helped me with things like
> forgiveness, and how he opened my heart. I really thought he would be
> happy for me, but oh no, our Mr. Schmuck's ego couldn't handle not being
> able to take the credit for it, and asked me why the hell I was still
> coming to him.
Abuse him right back. Ask him for
a reference to even one - just one! -
scientific study that says shrinks
with the most training and experience
are not worse than those with less.
This between and within 'brands' of
shrinkage.
'Scientific' means controlled, with
comparisons that do not depend on
just 'theraper' and 'therapee' reports.
Oren
Sally Levinson
Thnk...@concentric.net (a writer of sorts) wrote:
>
>
>In article <334498...@pi.net>, The Interessee <the_interessee@pi.
net> wrote:
>> Hi, Group!
>>
>> I funny thing happened today. I went to see my shrink, and I proudly
>> told him about my last week experiences in this group, and
specifically
>> those with Johnny, and how he greatly helped me with things like
>> forgiveness, and how he opened my heart. I really thought he would be
>> happy for me, but oh no, our Mr. Schmuck's ego couldn't handle not
being
>> able to take the credit for it, and asked me why the hell I was still
>> coming to him.
Shrinks are just people. Some are good and some are not. Some suit the
current needs, some do not. Perhaps it is time to shop for another
shrink.
Sally