Atari 2600 Super Football

[Vangele Ioannidis]

TheNerd: Most of the video games I talk about are... action games, sidescrollers, games that are in the realms of fantasy. But... there's a huge, huge following for games based on sports, and I get a lot of requests for that. And, I'm not really a big fan. Because.. I don't know, I-I guess I like fantasy games more, because it's something that you couldn't do in real life, whereas a sports game, you could... go outside and play sports. It's possible. Not for me, 'cause... I don't know anything about sports. I'm a fuckin' nerd!

The Nerd: Usually, I stick to what I know best. But sports video games have been around since video games first existed. They're not goin' away. How do I ignore it for so long? I can't. There's boxing and racing games; I don't mind those too much, but the ones we're talkin' about are all the ball games, like baseball. Look how many baseball games there are. I don't even know where to begin. "Major League", "All Stars", whatever, always named after players' names, sequels to games-- What the Hell's different this time? It's baseball. And there's basketball. NBA this and NBA that. One of the most popular games of all time is NBA Jam. Okay, it's basketball... again.

The Nerd: What I don't understand is why everything is always "bowl". What, like a toilet bowl? Okay, I know at least what the Super Bowl is. It's the most anticipated football game in the season. And with so much testosterone and high energy goin' around, why is the halftime show always some pussy pop group? Get Metallica in there or somethin'; It doesn't make any sense!

The Nerd: Aaand it's one of the worst games I ever played in my life. Are these football players, or are they Stormtroopers? Are they wearing helmets, or are these microwaves on their heads? Is it Team White vs. Team... Naked? Is that a crowd noise, or is it the sounds of the ocean? Is that the entire field? Yeah, it is. And it's surrounded by water, it looks like. Yeah, it's like an island. It's Football Island. (chuckles) In other words, Hell. I'm gonna make it, I'm gonna make it, yeah, yeah...! (scores a touchdown) TOUCHDOWN!

The Nerd: Basketball, now this is some great stuff. What is this? Purple man can't jump? I love that you're dribbling a square ball. That's right, this was before circles were invented. I like how the players are constantly stomping around, like Les Claypool or Angus Young. Or perhaps like a dog, getting its belly scratched.

The Nerd: When it comes to baseball games, there's a handful of them. Like Home Run. Even though I know nothing about sports, I can tell you one thing. There's only one pitcher in baseball! What the Hell's going on here? They eat the other players! In the same way that Pac-Man eats the ghosts.

The Nerd: Super Challenge Baseball is slightly advanced. By slightly, I mean... it's like a bunch of restroom signs got loose and started playing a game of baseball. The batter's sorta like a letter G that's been stepped on or something.

The Nerd: Nobody has a neck and they balance the balls on their heads. But hey, it looks better than the other game, and graphics don't matter much if the game plays well. And this one... does not. It's shit. I can't figure out how to control the other players. And it's Atari. There's not too many buttons to try. Have you ever seen a game of baseball where the catcher runs out to get the ball? By the time he gets it, the batter has already run to first base, had a cup of coffee, and watched the whole Godfather trilogy.

The Nerd: That is the sound of all-encompassing negativity. Really, what's it supposed to be? The sound of the bat cutting through space and time? Why is the batter naked? I'm not tryin' to be funny, he is naked. You can see all the other players wearing shirts and pants. The batter is naked. And they gave him a dick. Maybe it's the knee, but then where's the other knee? It's a dick. The batter is naked. Concluded.

The Nerd: Ice Hockey. It's somewhat playable. This is a little bit of an economic version of hockey. They can only get two sticks, so when the player passes the puck to his teammate, they have to pass the stick, too.

The Nerd: RealSports Volleyball. Your teammate is your mirror double, and can only copy your every move. When you bend over, you look like a harp. The sound of the ocean is like an atom bomb going off.

The Nerd: Boxing. What is this? Geodude fighting Mr. Game & Watch in the middle of a baseball field? I gotta admit, I was pretty confused looking at this, until I figured out that it's an overhead view. All along I thought they were crabs or something. (chuckles) This is hilarious. Too bad there's no fall-down graphic, because then we could have seen their whole bodies.

The Nerd: Let's step it up with RealSports Boxing. As the title suggests, this is the real version. The graphics are way advanced, even though you can see through the outlines on their arms, and when they get knocked down, they look like they've been squashed by a steamroller. They punch each other so hard, the sounds of their impacts resonate like a cannon blast. And one more thing: you can select your character. For the 2600, that is pretty innovative.

The Nerd: Tennis. Playable, yes. Graphically advanced, no. Is that a net, or is it a wall? Could they not make a simple grid? Yes, they could! RealSports Tennis actually has a net. And get this: you can enter a name! Not that I care to, but it's another interesting thing to see in a 2600 game.

The Nerd: Grand Pricks. Yeah, it's "prix," but it looks like "pricks." It's a bunch of kazoos flyin' through a cabbage patch. Not too bad. But then try out Math Grand Prix. Your car can't move until you finish a math question! You wouldn't wish this game on your worst enemies.

The Nerd: Karate. What's up with your legs? They're multi-jointed! It's like you're fighting on a giant Combo! You know, those little pretzel bites with cheese in the middle? Yeah, I'm stretchin' now. Before there were combos in Killer Instinct, you were... mashin' the button hoping you'll eventually hit your opponent. It's crap. Moving on.

The Nerd: And this person golfing looks like MIMAL the elf. Now I have to explain. If you look on the United States map, MIMAL is an acronym for Minnesota, Iowa, Missouri, Arkansas, and Louisiana. Spells MIMAL, and looks like an elf. With Minnesota being the hat, Louisiana being the foot. And that's MIMAL playing golf. But am I talkin' about video games here, or US geography? Let's move on.

The Nerd: Well, that's Atari Sports for ya. Some of these games were pretty innovative for their time, and others were... a little crappy. I think it's obvious to say that in all the years since, sports games have gotten better. So if that's the type of game you enjoy, then game on.

The Nerd: Maybe you're the kind of person who remembers which bush to burn in The Legend of Zelda to find the labyrinth, or maybe you're the kind of person who remembers the score to some sports game years ago.

The Nerd: Maybe you like to go around in a Star Trek uniform, or you like to go around in a sports uniform. And I don't mean like a sports T-shirt, but, the same jersey that the players in the game wear. Whatever the case, maybe, somehow, in our own ways, we're all nerds.

RealSports Football presents a simplified version of football for play. Players in the game cannot go out of bounds or fumble the football, and there are no penalties in the game. A touchdown automatically scores 7 points; there is no kicking for extra points.

Each game is 15 minutes long and is played on a standard 100-yard football field. There are no kickoffs, and each side is given five players. The team on the offensive side of the ball has a quarterback, a flanker, and three offensive linemen (a center and two guards); the user controls the one with the ball. The team on defense has two defensive linemen, two cornerbacks, and one linebacker, which the user controls.

On offense, the user is given these choices for plays: pass left, pass right, run or kick. The game does not recognize a handoff (the usual method of a running play) and has no running back, although the quarterback is allowed to scramble. After the play is selected, the user presses the joystick button to snap the ball and start play. Once the quarterback lets go of the ball on a passing play, user control immediately moves to the receiver. To pass or kick the ball, the user presses the joystick button, and to navigate the field, the user moves the joystick.

On defense, there are more choices: full-out blitz, left cornerback cover, right cornerback cover, and prevent (both cornerbacks deep). Interceptions are incorporated into the game, but play is called dead when one occurs, and possession is turned over to the interceptor.

Seven points are scored for a touchdown, three for a successful field goal, and two for a safety. After each score, the opposing team gains possession at their own 20-yard line. The scoreboard shows a maximum score of 99 per team, but hitting that limit does not stop the game.

The 2600 version's programming was assigned to Rob Zdybel. Atari asked him that the game should display 22 players at once, but according to Zdybel that was impossible if the players were to move. The 5200 and Atari 8-bit versions were handled by Jim Huether, who wanted to work on a football game since he joined Atari. Development of these versions took about one year, Huether did the design, the programming, the sounds, and even the first draft of the manual himself. He had to demonstrate the game to Steven Spielberg and the senior management of Atari when Spielberg visited Atari.[2]

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