Manreia draft

[john.dunn]

Hey folks,

By way of background - a couple of weeks back, Jason, Ross, and I decided to hand each other an initial batch of principle writing assignments. Some of this is material that should naturally flow into blog posts. Other is stuff that we're deliberately reserving for the book. Ultimately, however, it's all the heart and soul of the world we're designing.

We decided to do 6 separate 5,000 word assignments. Each one contains a nation, a Witch, and a Witchbreed. Not all of these correlate perfectly, but there were clear tendencies so it seemed fairly straightforward to link things. With that in mind, here's the concordance that we're working off of:

Witch	Breed	Nation
Blood Witch	Dhampir	Valkenholm
The Crone	Golems	Hebron
Baba Yaga	Vargr	Steppengrad
Morgen	Revenant	Cairn Kainen
The Djinn	Mummy	Hyphrates
The Chimera	Mongrels	Manreia

As an additional FYI, here's who's writing what:
John - Manreia/Hyphrates
Jason - Steppengrad/Hebron
Ross - Valkenholm/Cairn Kainen

So, with that in mind, here's the Manreia document. This currently sits at 5,000 words. Opinions and feedback are welcome.

Thanks!
-John

[dar...@darrellhardy.com]

John,

Thanks for the chance to read about Manreia! Some awesome stuff here.

Attached is a marked-up copy of the document. I added a bunch of notes,
and made some text tweaks... probably more than necessary, but once I get
into the editing zone, I tend to go crazy. I marked all the changes, so
you can ignore them as you see fit, but I hope they're helpful.

I'm looking forward to reading more about the world!

- Darrell

[John Dunn]

Great feedback, Darrell!

Thanks so much for taking the time to provide it! I've already given it a
quick review, and there are some great insights, pointing out a number of
things that I'll make it a point to tweak.

-John


On 7/3/13 9:53 AM, "dar...@darrellhardy.com" <dar...@darrellhardy.com>
wrote: