JOKE: Undeniable Adult Truths

[AwfulGames]

Undeniable Adult Truths

I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear
your computer history if you die.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was
younger.

There is great need for a sarcasm font.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

Was learning cursive really necessary?

Map Quest really needs to skip the first four steps of their
directions. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

I bet a lot more people would read the obituaries if they told you how
the person died.

I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least a little bit tired.

Bad decisions make good stories.

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work
when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for
the rest of the day.

Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blu-ray? I really
don't want to have to restart my collection again.

I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me
if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I
swear I did not make any changes to.

I confess -- I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I
know not to answer when they call.

I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with alcohol than with Kay.

I sure wish my GPS had an "Avoid Bad Part of Town" routing option.

These days, I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between
boredom and hunger. Unfortunately, a package of Oreos solves either
problem equally well.

How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod
and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they
said?

I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to
prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and
sisters!

Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,
and you can wear them forever. Especially jeans.

Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not
know what time it is when I look back up.

Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car
keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on
the Donkey -- but you can bet that everyone can find and push the
snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed,
first time, every time.

The first testicular guard, the "cup," was used in hockey in 1874, and
the first helmet was used in 1974. This means that it only took 100
years for men to realize that their brain is also important …..
Ladies, quit laughing.

Want more humor? Check out AwfulGames.com for
"Dear Abby" Letters You Never Saw
http://awfulgames.com/?p=1204