book to recommend?

[Laura Flynn Endres]

A family member wants to "grill me" on unschooling and I'm feeling a bit edgy about the whole thing.  I thought perhaps I could recommend he read a book about unschooling, and that might deter some of the uncomfortable conversations we're having.  Or at least provide some explanation.

 

He is a linear thinker.  Someone who wants 'proof' or statistics or whatever, so the book ought to have more academic tone and less emotional - if that's possible.  (Basically the opposite of what speaks to me.) 

 

I am considering "The Book of Learning and Forgetting" by Frank Smith.  Any other ideas?

 

Laura

 

 

*~*~*~*~*
www.piscesgrrrl.blogspot.com
*~*~*~*~*
"Children aren't coloring books.
You don't get to fill them with your
 favorite colors."  ~From The Kite Runner
*~*~*~*~*

[kath...@gmail.com]

>>>> I am considering "The Book of Learning and Forgetting" by Frank
Smith.  Any other ideas? <<<<

I think Frank Smith is a good one and he's written quite a bit of stuff
about problematic reading instruction as well. I thought about getting
his book from Amazon after reading the interesting reviews there that
seem to have his writing leaning toward unschooly thoughts.

However I don't think anything he writes explains unschooling itself.
Which is maybe not too bad considering. What I like about suggesting
things that aren't directly about unschooling is that by supporting the
principles of unschooling from the standpoint of those who aren't even
arguing for unschooling, one might be able to get to the root of
certain things that unschooling is geared for.

It depends. If I knew what some of the comments were that you're
getting.

~Katherine

[Sandra Dodd]

-=-A family member wants to "grill me" on unschooling and I'm feeling
a bit edgy about the whole thing-=-

I think Joyce's site would be good.

http://joyfullyrejoycing.com

The Book of Learning and Forgetting wouldn't be bad.

You could send him here, too:
http://unschooling.blogspot.com

Sandra

[Sandra Dodd]

Another thing to consider is to write something to him instead of
submitting yourself to trial by relative. <g>

http://sandradodd.com/relatives
http://sandradodd.com/relatives/differences
http://sandradodd.com/relatives/responding

Sandra

[Pam Sorooshian]

Or - go through sandra and Joyce's sites and print out a series of
articles that you think are more his style - put them together as a set
for him to read.

-pam

[Jacquie Krauskopf]

I think that family members have such a difficult time with kids that are homeschooled/unschooled is because they don't know what to say to the kids! This stems from my brother who has a daughter 2 years older than i and he was very big on education and going to school. Whenever he seen me all he said was: "Hi Jacquie, how's school?" It was never "How are you?"
Jacquie





--- On Thu, 5/7/09, Laura Flynn Endres <pisce...@aeroinc.net> wrote:

> From: Laura Flynn Endres <pisce...@aeroinc.net>
> Subject: [UnschoolingDiscussion] book to recommend?
> To: Unschoolin...@googlegroups.com
> Date: Thursday, May 7, 2009, 6:51 PM
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> A family member wants to "grill me" on
> unschooling and I'm feeling a bit

> edgy about the whole thing.  I thought perhaps I could
> recommend he read a
> book about unschooling, and that might deter some of the
> uncomfortable
> conversations we're having.  Or at least provide
> some explanation.
>  
> He is a linear thinker.  Someone who wants
> 'proof' or statistics or
> whatever, so the book ought to have more academic tone and
> less emotional - if
> that's possible.  (Basically the opposite of what
> speaks to me.) 
>
>  

> I am considering "The Book of Learning and
> Forgetting" by Frank
> Smith.  Any other ideas?
>  

[Rina Groeneveld]

Edward Deci has written several books on intrinsic motivation from a scientific standpoint, with lots of research, etc. They are not directly about unschooling, but might be the kind of thing for the relative you describe.

Rina

> More than mail–Windows Live™ goes way beyond your inbox. More than messages

[Laura Flynn Endres]

>
> Or - go through sandra and Joyce's sites and print out a series of
> articles that you think are more his style - put them together as a set
> for him to read.
>
> -pam

I think that's a great idea. Maybe I will go through my favorite sites and
compile my own set of articles. That way I can hit on the issues that I
think are of most concern, and hit on topics that I'd most like to impart.
Thank you to everyone who made suggestions, I've kept your emails so I can
follow up on the book titles and links and names you all suggested. Keep
them coming, too - I love hearing of new resources for myself as well!

This is a very loaded situation because the griller (his words, BTW - "dying
to grill") is my mom's new fiance. Oy. There are many layers to this, not
the least of which is my having a hard time accepting their marriage,
period, much less his concern about unschooling. If he wasn't this close,
I'd have let the belief that we homeschool (vs unschool) ride since that
prevents the mildly curious from getting their pants in a bunch most times.
But you can see why that ruse wouldn't have lasted.

I had a long talk with my mom this morning, complete with tears, about
treading lightly into this territory and that relationships take a long time
to develop so it's too soon for judgments. There are other concerns that've
involved my kids and my hackles have been raised for a few weeks now. For
background, he's a nice enough man but he's probably my polar opposite. He
also has had little to no experience with children and doesn't have an easy
manner around them. It's been hard on my kids. My mom lives just down the
road and she and my dad had a 24-hour-open-door policy. Besides home, that
was probably the #1 safe spot for my kids. That has changed for my kids and
we're all a little on edge because of it. We'll get used to it, but we have
to grieve what was and hope it can continue, changed, but still good for
all.

Since the situation isn't going to go away, I am considering the easiest,
most peaceful path toward understanding. I thought a book - or, as some of
you suggested too, some articles - might be a good suggestion.

L

[k]

You know.  ???  He's the new one.  I would think he would be open to the way the family is now not jump in and try to change it. 

 

Ah well.  Maybe that's a bad thought though.
 

~Katherine

[k]

Quoting myself:

 

>>>> You know.  ???  He's the new one.  I would think he would be open to the way the family is now not jump in and try to change it. 

 

Ah well.  Maybe that's a bad thought though. <<<<

 

It's not altogether bad.  I like Katharine Hepburn's idea (I think it's hers): Never explain yourself.  Your friends don't need it and your enemies won't believe it. 

 

Just being confident in what you do, even though it's sad not to have the run of your mom's place like before, is enough explanation for anyone who really wants to know.

 

~Katherine

 

[Sandra Dodd]

Mary Griffith's book on homeschooling might be something real but
wan. The fact that it's many years old might help your mom's guy.
That and The Book of Learning and Forgetting, and maybe letting him
know that even people who WANT to understand unschooling can take a
year to really get it. There are people who are sure they've been
doing it for a couple of years or more, and at some point they write
and say "OH!! *Now* I get it."

There's a collection of that here:
http://sandradodd.com/gettingit

Sandra