Marching Orders

[J.T.]

Well, I must confess, I did not anticipate being the first to wield
supreme executive power. I thought up so many creative ideas for an org
structure: A re-vamped inquisition, a mental institution, a musical
crew (!), a fast-food restaurant, none of them really spoke to me.

No, I know who I am. We had to be a company. The Hierarchy is now Upper
Management. The Bust are now Middle Management. The Rabble are now
"Front-line Customer Relations Assets (FCRA)."

I knew this as soon as I realized what I had to do for my first
command.

I needed something that would give us an opportunity to explore both
the benefits and the hazards of vertical structures, that would give us
the opportunity to study both overt and covert forms of power.
Something that would enable us to come together as a group and redefine
our purpose and vision.

That's right. I'm ordering you all to formulate a group Mission
Statement. You may thank me for my wisdom.

To make things more interesting, I'm stratifying the group. Starting
now, it is the responsibility of Middle Management to co-ordinate the
FCRA in order to obtain both ideas and buy-in. Upper Management will
oversee the efforts of Middle Management, but not manage the FCRA
directly. I, regretfully (hehehe), will have to be on a closed-door
policy for all complaints. While I will be on hand to view the list and
offer occasional advice, my Epoply duties prevent me from being able to
make myself fully available. Specifically, I will only be able to
respond to private e-mails from Upper Management and Middle Management
with even-numbered designations. My apologies for any difficulties this
may cause during this crucial time in our corporate history.

I am counting on each and every one of you to leverage your talents and
pull together on this most crucial of steps towards leveraging our
collective talents towards quality.

In collective hope,

Epop Orderly the VI

[lvx23]

We need better coffe in the breakroom. And would it kill you to clean the bathrooms once a day???

[Hearth Watch]

[_]D

The sponges are behind the toilet. There was some
Lysol, but I put it in the coffee.

Surprisingly, it made it much better. I've got some
consultants from Starbucks coming in Monday.

--- lvx23 <lvx2...@gmail.com> wrote:

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[Ceilede]

Our most-wise and honorable Epop said:
> Something that would enable us to come together as a
> group and redefine
> our purpose and vision.
>
> That's right. I'm ordering you all to formulate a
> group Mission
> Statement. You may thank me for my wisdom.

If we are acting as a corporate entity, we must assume
that we are in the business of making money.

What are our assets?
What is our product?
How will we achieve the goal of making money?

-Ms. Patterson
Production Coordinator
-

[Hearth Watch]

Or, to take it another step, what is our "money?" U.S.
Currency? Magical knowledge? Positive experiences?

If we succeed, how will we know it?

--- Ceilede <ceile...@yahoo.com> wrote:

[Sighris777]

Good questions.
- Maybe the Epop will let some of us give our thoughts/answers.

BTW, I think Hearth had a good question too:
"what is ~our~ money?
- Cash/Currency/gold? Magical knowledge? Positive experiences?"

This is an interesting start!
Sighris 777

[Hearth Watch]

> - Maybe the Epop will let some of us give our
> thoughts/answers.
>

Please, feel free to use the company listserv for any
such discussions. It's always been my feeling that
giving everyone a voice starts with giving everyone a
chance to communicate.

[Shivanath]

Well, as Junior Manager In Charge of Emptying Wastebaskets (and
Hiring) I'd like to suggest that our job be (obviously) growth, and
perhaps developing some new products to assist in that growth. Plus we
need a stricter company policy on wearing namebadges :-)

(and, let me congratulate the Epop and CEO on this bold new initiative!)

--
Dharma. Artha. Kama. Moksha.

[lvx23]

<hands shivanath a tissue to wipe the turd off his nose>

[Shivanath]

[ hey, when you're this low on the totem pole...]

[Ceilede]

How can we sell this product to the masses? What will
appeal to them???? It needs to be something sexy and
smart. But especially sexy.

I think we need a stricter policy on employees
reporting to management and attending meetings.

Also, may I suggest CEpOp as a title for our Commander
in Chief? :)

[Hearth Watch]

>
> I think we need a stricter policy on employees
> reporting to management and attending meetings.

Excellent idea. Write it up as a formal proposal and
send it to myself and Upper Management.

>
> Also, may I suggest CEpOp as a title for our
> Commander
> in Chief? :)
>
>

Another excellent idea. Keep up the good work.

CEpOp Orderly the VI