MEGHAN'S MOUNTAIN

[JRSt...@aol.com]

February 9, 2012

 

    a special email from Jerry

 

                               ELEVEN DOWN.......ONE TO GO

 

     Today is one of those days when you feel like sharing your inner thoughts with those you love, and those that understand.

     When Meghan was first diagnosed with her cancerous tumor back in July of 2010 we knew she would require both chemo and radiation to put the tumor in remission, to get that cancer out of her body. Then it was discovered that the cancer had entered her spinal fluids, most probably from the biopsy of the tumor since it was so close to her spine...those little "bugs of destruction" had found their way into the spinal fluid.

   Meghan was told that the "norm" is twelve shots of chemo into the spinal fluids...someone somewhere had come up with this "formula". So she began the process, each month with a shot into the spinal fluid. Some months we passed in order to get her body "back in shape". I have watched every process she has endured and I can honestly say this is the toughest...it is brutal, painful and normally takes her about five to ten days, if not longer, to get over that process. It comes with nausea, headaches, etc.

   After the first round of chemo (about one year ago) Meghan has continued to be cancer free in her spinal fluids. Sometimes her fluids are so clear that her oncologist doesn't even send them to the lab..it's that good. So after seeing her go thru what I call this "process of destruction" to the body and mind, her oncologist felt that ten rounds was enough...he was satisfied that she needed no more. And I had personally talked to patients that stopped at seven or eight because they could not tolerate the effects, and they were all doing fine (at least the ones I talked to).

  Then one day Meghan says " I am going for all twelve...I began this climb to beat "Leuky" and I intend to do that again...I want all twelve shots". Today was  round eleven.

  Having watched her with the first ten, and seeing what I saw, I have a hard time defining this desire to go the "limit". I could call her a hero and that would be a perfect description. I could call her "crazy" and that might even fit. But it is more than all of that. It is a young woman who wants to live more than most of us, who wants to win this war against cancer, who continues to climb and climb against all odds, who believes in herself. A young woman who wants to continue to make a difference for others, not in just reaching out with gifts for patients or items for cancer institutions, but who wants to let every cancer patient know that you never, ever give up. You choose your own destiny. It's a vision and strength that is indescribable.

   So today we went for round eleven in the climb to the top of mountain number two. Not easy, that I promise. But as one of the doctor's in Seattle said to me, "If I had to bet on anyone, Meghan is the one I would put my money on".

  So why do I write this. Because it helps me to "get it out", because it is part of the "learning process" that Meghan wants to teach us about, and because I think that Meghan deserves a little support of love from all of us.

  So we are now home from the Brown Cancer Center. I know what the next few days will be like(hopefully they will be better than the past ones). 

  I have learned over these past eight years that love and support is as vital as the medicine the doctor's administer. Sometimes, I think, maybe even more. That is why I am asking for a little love and support for my Meghan. An email at stein...@gmail.com or a message on facebook at either Meghan Steinberg or I support Meghan's Mountain!!!.

  Lighting the mountains takes more than the patient or the caregiver or the family. It takes lot's of love. And to know others care makes the climb so much easier.

   By the way Meghan, I agree with the doctor in Seattle, "my money is definitely on YOU".

   Love you guys

   BELIEVE

   Jerry