A "few" notes on Tales From the Fae

198 views
Skip to first unread message

Floyd Bristol

unread,
Apr 24, 2018, 12:55:22 AM4/24/18
to Gwyllion

Warning! this post contains spoilers to some of the Tales From the Fae, do not read unless you have read them all.

 

I love reading your stories and I can't wait untill you post more chapters. I realy like the full and rich world you have built. There are so many questions and Ideas that your story has given me, I can wait for them to be answered in the coming chapters. Maybe some of my notes or comments will help inspire you to write some more stories. You don't have to answer if it will lead to spoilers for future plot points, so you can keep us in suspense, or if they are just not topics you want to reply to at this time. However or whenever you reveal the answers to your world, we will all be greatfull.

 

 

Faerie Tale

 

Isaac Asimov had a very similar Problem and solution in his Robot stories. The Robot had to follow the 4 laws of Robotics to stop humans from harming themselves without Harming them. To take over the Human race would invite revolt that would harm Humans. So to save humans from themselfs he would secretly control them in small but meaning full ways behind the scenes. By Identifying people that would cause harm to the Human Race and promote or transfer them to a "better Job"where they could do no harm to the Human Race. It is a simple and elegant solution where everybody wins.

 

Songsmith

 

The time difference in the meeting with Gaia, was that because Gaia is long lived and that is the way Gaia interacts with others? Why is that different from Gaia's meeting at the Academy, was it because it was a shorter meeting or because it was in "our world" vs "Gaia's world"?

 

Why has Gaia not replaced the Dominion Queens or the High Priestess when they die?

Is Gaia just taking her time to find a replacement (A thousand years being a short time for Gaia), or is Gaia busy with other problems to choose the replacements, or is Gaia trying to come up with a new way of doing things (Like bringing back the Tuatha de Danann)

The Academy of Dana

 

You talked about and showed the dangers of the closed sections of the Mountain. You also talked about the dangers of the Market but did not demonstrate them in the stories. What are the dangers of The Market? What kind of Laws and/or Punishments could befall the students from the academy? Will we see more of this in the next school year?

 

Gaia talked about the Nymphs using humans, do they or other Fae still do this?

 

Can a Fae change the forest they are linked with. What if an important Fae looses their forest, can they change with another fae, the more important the Fae (Principal) the more important the forest (National Forest) they are linked to?

 

Can the Tree Portals replace all of the human road and air travel, or will it over load the system like a denial of service attack?

 

Are there any dangerout plants in the Fae world? Will we see a class on dangerous plants? Will the final in botanical class be escaping unaided from a dangerous plant, the better the student is in the class the more dangerous the plant in the final.

 

 

Unseelie Summer

 

 

Why is Talise coming out now, is it to keep Stuckey from making the same mistakes she made?

 

Stuckey's intern with Talise shoud start with her First question being What was your greatest regret/mistake you made and things she would have done differently. Hind sight being 20/20, Talise can tell Stuckey what actions to avoid if she is to follow the same path.

 

 

 

First Contact Protocols

 

Where will the Fomorians attack from space be confronted? Will it be in deep space (Can the magic reach that far?), or will it be in Earth orbit? How are the Fae going to reach the Fomorians? Will they need help from NASA? Who will clean up the debris in orbit before it comes crashing down, NASA or magic?

 

Are the Fomorians going to try and wipe out all life or will they try to corrupt it by Terraforming? What if they fail and only do a partal teraforming (aka SyFy's Defiance 2013-2015) just enough to change things but not enough to make Gaia wipe the slate clean. Asimov was able to take his two worlds "The Robots" and "The Foundation" and make them into one world, I hope you can do the same with your worlds. It can lead into a Botanical class for the students using some of the plants from your other stories.

 

Would it be better for the Fae to come out before the Fomorians attack or after. Maybe they could crash the UN meeting with all the world leaders, with a show of power like "The Day the Earth stood still - 1951" and show them the danger of the Fomorians. Or would it be better to do a more controlled introduction to the whole world (A few key scientist, then a few politicians and then a few major world powers, and finaly a intro to the world at the U.N.)

There will probably be some who will think the Fomorians are here to help humans against the Fae scourge (Because of what the some of the Fae have done to Humans, and are thinking about doing). Could you prove it without letting the Fomorians attack first?

 

Are the The Sluagh working with or part of the Fomorians that have sliped past Gaia's defenses, or have they just gone evil.

 

 

 

Marjorie Greene

unread,
Apr 24, 2018, 11:28:12 PM4/24/18
to gwyl...@googlegroups.com
Oh my. Let me see what I can answer...

On Mon, Apr 23, 2018 at 9:55 PM, Floyd Bristol <fbri...@earthlink.net> wrote:

Warning! this post contains spoilers to some of the Tales From the Fae, do not read unless you have read them all.

 

I love reading your stories and I can't wait untill you post more chapters. I realy like the full and rich world you have built. There are so many questions and Ideas that your story has given me, I can wait for them to be answered in the coming chapters. Maybe some of my notes or comments will help inspire you to write some more stories. You don't have to answer if it will lead to spoilers for future plot points, so you can keep us in suspense, or if they are just not topics you want to reply to at this time. However or whenever you reveal the answers to your world, we will all be greatfull.

 

 

Faerie Tale

 

Isaac Asimov had a very similar Problem and solution in his Robot stories. The Robot had to follow the 4 laws of Robotics to stop humans from harming themselves without Harming them. To take over the Human race would invite revolt that would harm Humans. So to save humans from themselfs he would secretly control them in small but meaning full ways behind the scenes. By Identifying people that would cause harm to the Human Race and promote or transfer them to a "better Job"where they could do no harm to the Human Race. It is a simple and elegant solution where everybody wins.

 

This story was the very first of my Fae tales, and written back in my first year in college. I was playing with the idea of the Fae, and almost absentmindedly put together the hierarchy of Principalities that would be the base in later tales (if I had known that, I think i would have spent more time working out some of the details Ah well...). I never took this story further on 'paper', but there *was* indeed more to this beyond messing with industry to better the Earth. Most specifically, in regard to what becomes of Rachael, the main character of this story.  There's a very brief clue in chapter 2, when Verith starts to drop to her knee, and Kiela scolds her, saying, "It's not certain..." Since I'm unlikely to fill this one out, I'll give this away - Rachael, through a series of events, is the Seelie Dominion Queen seen in The Academy of Dana. I may relate the full story of her transformation in a future book... We'll see. Some of that process is mentioned in Unseelie Summer.

 

Songsmith

 

The time difference in the meeting with Gaia, was that because Gaia is long lived and that is the way Gaia interacts with others? Why is that different from Gaia's meeting at the Academy, was it because it was a shorter meeting or because it was in "our world" vs "Gaia's world"?

 

Hmm. There are many places in the world of the Fae where time runs at a different pace, not just Gaia's house. The Market for instance. There are some things involved in this that I'm not going to relate right now as they would give away some plot points I'm saving for the later books. 


 

Why has Gaia not replaced the Dominion Queens or the High Priestess when they die?

She does sometimes - see above. But she very much wishes not to interfere. Mostly, she deals with the upper echelon. There is a side story I have collected in my head that deals with a briefly mentioned (but important) character by the name of Luiseach Gilldanu. All I will say is that Gaia's work is subtle, and takes many, many centuries.

 
Is Gaia just taking her time to find a replacement (A thousand years being a short time for Gaia), or is Gaia busy with other problems to choose the replacements, or is Gaia trying to come up with a new way of doing things (Like bringing back the Tuatha de Danann)

See above. I can say no more.
 

The Academy of Dana

 

You talked about and showed the dangers of the closed sections of the Mountain. You also talked about the dangers of the Market but did not demonstrate them in the stories. What are the dangers of The Market? What kind of Laws and/or Punishments could befall the students from the academy? Will we see more of this in the next school year?

The book after Unseelie Summer is slated to deal with some of the dangers in the closed sections of the Academy. Yes, hey were closed for a reason, and yes, they have a role in the long plot. Magnus Op will be involved, as well as at least one new character coming in Unseelie Summer.

The Market is primarily dangerous because it is inhabited by both courts. As a new student, it probably wouldn't be a good idea to inadvertently offend a member of the Unseelie, especially if you're not Michelle. While technically "neutral" ground, challenges and insults *are* occasionally exchanged, sometimes with very permanent results. 

 

 

Gaia talked about the Nymphs using humans, do they or other Fae still do this?

Oh yes. Most of the time, the humans aren't aware. Rachael (different from the Dominion Queen) in Little Lost Nymph, is an example of that. I never finished the story, but Mac is seen later in Poppins Return.
 

 

Can a Fae change the forest they are linked with. What if an important Fae looses their forest, can they change with another fae, the more important the Fae (Principal) the more important the forest (National Forest) they are linked to?

Like any bureaucracy, tasks are assigned, sometimes with meaning, and sometimes at random. The Principalities do not often work directly with a forest or other area. They manage. About the only Fae entity that cannot easily change their assignment, is a Dryad, since their tree is fixed. 

 

 

Can the Tree Portals replace all of the human road and air travel, or will it over load the system like a denial of service attack?

Nah. While non-fae can travel through them, it would take a member of the Fae to open one. 
 

 

Are there any dangerout plants in the Fae world? Will we see a class on dangerous plants? Will the final in botanical class be escaping unaided from a dangerous plant, the better the student is in the class the more dangerous the plant in the final.

 

Perhaps. I use plants in so many other of my works that I have resisted using them too much in the Fae tales. Chapter 47 of Academy is about the only place I have relented, and then only to explain what happened to Shaina.


 

 

Unseelie Summer

 

 

Why is Talise coming out now, is it to keep Stuckey from making the same mistakes she made?

Sorry, not going to say.
 

 

Stuckey's intern with Talise shoud start with her First question being What was your greatest regret/mistake you made and things she would have done differently. Hind sight being 20/20, Talise can tell Stuckey what actions to avoid if she is to follow the same path.

 

 

 

First Contact Protocols

 

I'm not going to answer too much here, as it is pretty far into the future, and while I DO have answers to these questions, it would give too much away.


 

Where will the Fomorians attack from space be confronted? Will it be in deep space (Can the magic reach that far?), or will it be in Earth orbit? How are the Fae going to reach the Fomorians? Will they need help from NASA? Who will clean up the debris in orbit before it comes crashing down, NASA or magic?

 

Are the Fomorians going to try and wipe out all life or will they try to corrupt it by Terraforming? What if they fail and only do a partal teraforming (aka SyFy's Defiance 2013-2015) just enough to change things but not enough to make Gaia wipe the slate clean. Asimov was able to take his two worlds "The Robots" and "The Foundation" and make them into one world, I hope you can do the same with your worlds. It can lead into a Botanical class for the students using some of the plants from your other stories.

Gaia does explain some of this to Miranda in AOD.

 

 

Would it be better for the Fae to come out before the Fomorians attack or after. Maybe they could crash the UN meeting with all the world leaders, with a show of power like "The Day the Earth stood still - 1951" and show them the danger of the Fomorians. Or would it be better to do a more controlled introduction to the whole world (A few key scientist, then a few politicians and then a few major world powers, and finaly a intro to the world at the U.N.)

There will probably be some who will think the Fomorians are here to help humans against the Fae scourge (Because of what the some of the Fae have done to Humans, and are thinking about doing). Could you prove it without letting the Fomorians attack first?

 

Are the The Sluagh working with or part of the Fomorians that have sliped past Gaia's defenses, or have they just gone evil.

The Slaugh are Fae that serve neither court. They are *not* Fomorians. I will say no more.

 Marjorie

Rafale

unread,
Apr 26, 2018, 8:17:25 AM4/26/18
to Gwyllion
I hope it's okay that I'll jump in here with a question of my own.

I was re-reading AoD, and through my improved understanding of Irish (which I'm currently learning) I noticed something:
When using Fae Common, you use a mix of vocabulary from Irish, Scottish and Manx (I haven't noticed any Welsh terms yet, but I don't know the language). Can one assume that you're implying the fae language as well as the languages of the three islands evolved from a common source? Or possibly that the three evolved from Fae Common?

Regards,
Rafale

PS: It's mo thóin, not ma thoin ;-)

Marjorie Greene

unread,
Apr 26, 2018, 1:03:56 PM4/26/18
to gwyl...@googlegroups.com
To be perfectly honest, Rafale, my Irish language skills are pretty weak. Most of what I know I have had to fudge. The mix of vocabulary is as much a failure of my own understanding as it is any 'plot choices'. I wish I was fluent, but alas, *that* does indeed take some serious time and practice with people who speak the language - both of which always seem to be in short supply. I used Fae Common as a cheat to get around some of the problems that I knew would eventually bite me. When you are writing on the fly...

To illustrate how far the issue of language can go, I am having to create a new language (Brownie) for Unseelie summer, and it has spiraled into a project that keeps me up at night. As soon as you start creating new languages, you have to bring in all sorts of other details in a story, many of which many never be used, but still have to be considered for realism - cultural history, language drift, slang, accents... And to make matter worse, Brownie has some very unique properties that make it unlike any language (that I am aware of) that currently exists (outside of fiction). I'm not a linguist. The extent of my linguistic education is a single college course I took decades ago as an interesting elective diversion.

So yeah. If you find issues with my translations, *please* let me know. I'm just guessing here. I SO wish I was fluent... Alas, it's probably not to be.

Marjorie

--
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Gwyllion" group.
To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to gwyllion+unsubscribe@googlegroups.com.
To post to this group, send email to gwyl...@googlegroups.com.
Visit this group at https://groups.google.com/group/gwyllion.
For more options, visit https://groups.google.com/d/optout.

Rafale

unread,
May 4, 2018, 6:51:14 AM5/4/18
to Gwyllion
On Thursday, April 26, 2018 at 7:03:56 PM UTC+2, Marjorie Greene wrote:
So yeah. If you find issues with my translations, *please* let me know. I'm just guessing here. I SO wish I was fluent... Alas, it's probably not to be.
 
Should I have misunderstood your intent, please forgive me. As it is, I took the liberty of starting a re-read of AoD and placed my focus on the language used.
I have just finished Chapter 10 and I thought I would write down what I found so far. All of this was done to the best of my current abilities, which are still far from what I wish they were. I do not guarantee 100% correctness, but I attempted to explain my findings for each part.

Chapter 1 - CAMP
  • "Oil-Thigh de Danann" -> Most likely you did not intend to use "de" ("off"), but rather "dé", which in this case would mean "of the Goddess". Then (deriving from Old Irish) this would mean "House of Education of the Goddess Dana"

Chapter 3 - Dominion Queen
  • I-MAX -> Although it's derived from "Images Maximum", the name is actually spelt "IMAX" without a dash

Chapter 4 - Placement
  • "Troggeyder" -> Just random info: It's Manx, and has a lot of different meanings - builder/constructor being one - depending on the word that follows. I assume you derived it from a boat or ship builder (troggeyder baatey / troggeyder lhong)
  • "Tuatha de Danann" -> as before, it should be "dé", referring to the Goddess herself
  • "gàirdean pishag" -> You translated it with "spell arm". "gàirdean" is Scottish for "arm", but the word for "spell" would be "pisreag" instead. Considering that the most likely use would be genitive, I'd go so far as to call it "gàirdean pisreige". May any people that know Scottish correct me.

Chapter 5 - Sexual Arts
  • "Dòrn Léir" -> Would actually be spelt "Dòrn Lèir". With "Dòrn" meaning "Fist" and Lèir being the noun for "sight" or "perception", or the adjective "clear", similar to Irish "léir". I assume in this combination one translation would be "obvious fist" or "clear fist". I like the combination of different languages within terms, but if you wish to stay within one language for terms you invented, I would suggest just changing léir to lèir.

Chapter 6 - Baths and Brassieres
  • Póg mo thoin ar bhéilín meala gcreime!” -> Congratulations! You were the first one to teach me how to swear in Irish. (Fun fact: That first part can be used for anything from mild surprise (e.g. if you think the other one is kidding) to a heavy insult). The actual spelling should be "Póg mo thóin" (mo is correct, as the pronoun is not changed for male or female context). The addressing should probably be written as "a", instead of "ar". The second part is actually a bit out of order, at least to me. I hope that someone here knows this stuff better than I do and can confirm or correct it, but here's what I know:
    • "creime"/"gcreime" is not a word I could find in my dictionary. A disease is rather listed as "galar". But Irish has so many different words that it is likely this one was missed.
    • as far as I know the grammar would put the disease first (in nominative form), followed by its description, potentially in genitive. Here I am unsure, but I would translate it almost literally as béilín mealach. The question is whether to use the genitive (galar an bhéilín mhealaigh) or the nominative (galar béilín mealach).
Considering the use of Irish as a mostly spoken language and the fact that Miranda mostly learnt it in the hallways, the grammar may differ. Besides, I'm not writing this to tell you what should be written there, just to give you some background information on what is written.

Chapter 7 - Candyland
  • "Aonach de Millshan" -> Aonach is more of a fair, a place of gathering. A market as in a shop would more likely be "margadh". Candy Fair sounds good though, although Millshan is an English spelling for that, the Irish one being milseán. "de" is misplaced here, you'd rather use the definite article and call it "Aonach na milseáin" (Fair of the sweets so to speak)

Chapter 8 - A friendly conversation
  • "Miranda de Sliabh an Iarainn" -> "Iron Mountain" is translated correctly, but "de" does not mean "from". Rather, you'd use "ó"
  • "Màthair mbeannacht ort" -> "Màthair" is Scottish, the Irish version being "Máthair". As I mentioned, I like the diversity story-wise, as it gives an impression of a common language uniting the ones we know nowadays. If you place value in staying within one language within a sentence, the Irish version would be appropriate, as "beannacht" is definitely Irish. Although from a grammatical perspective, "Beannacht máthar ort" would be more correct I believe. ("Blessings of the mother on you" instead of "The mother of blessings on you")

Chapter 9 - First Fight
  • "the her opponent" -> I believe "the" is misplaced here
Please let me know if this is something you want me to drop or continue.

Kind regards,
Rafale

Marjorie Greene

unread,
May 4, 2018, 1:29:08 PM5/4/18
to gwyl...@googlegroups.com
These are perfect! Thank you so much, really. Any other edits or corrections you find are *always* appreciated. I *think* I have made all the corrections in the online (and offline) files. No small thing since they are repeated in at least two other places (my text copies, and the versions used within the ebook versions) across multiple stories (Unseelie Summer and Poppins Return). Global edits are a serious bitch.

Marjorie

--

Rafale

unread,
May 9, 2018, 7:28:30 AM5/9/18
to Gwyllion
Forgive me for taking a bit longer this time. As before, I can not guarantee 100% coverage or correctness, but I did my very best.

Chapter 8 - A friendly conversation (forgot one)
  • "Dark Sidh" -> This would most likely be either Sìdh (Scottish) or Sidhe (Irish)
Chapter 12 - Illusions
  • "g‡irdean pishag" -> Character set error? Anyway, see the comment for Chapter 4
Chapter 19 - The Greie Leeideilagh
  • "greie leeideilagh" -> Just random info: It's Manx, and something along the line of a "direction finder" or "navigational tool". I suppose you already know that, but it might be interesting for anyone else reading this
Chapter 23 - The Refinery
  • "Ob'Ilar" -> I can only translate them separately. But do I guess correctly that you infer from Old Irish and basically call it a "River of Multitude"? Perhaps more poetically translated as "Stream of Possibilities"?
Chapter 28 - Cuts and Curses
  • "Lámind Argid" -> Just two minor spelling issues here: One additional fada, and one additional i: "Lámínd Airgid". I couldn't find a proper translation for lámínd, but it seems to be an alternative form of lámann, which means "glove" or "sleeve" (derived from lámh - hand)
Chapter 30 - Beta Testing
  • "a half cup in a any one day" -> I believe the second "a" does not belong there.
Chapter 33 - Advocates
  • "Anam Figh" -> I really like the term. The grammar is slightly off though. I assume you did a literal translation of "Soul Weave" or "Life Weave"? Unfortunately, Figh is a verb, the noun being fíochán. Simply replacing the word like that would most likely make this the "Soul of the web", so they'd have to be swapped to form "Fíochán Anam", the Soul Weave, if I'm not entirely wrong.
  • "As a Leth" -> "Out of her side"? That would certainly fit the context, although I don't know if the preposition is the correct choice. Unfortunately, choosing the right prepositions in Irish is somewhat of a weak spot for me ;-)
Chapter 38 - Updates and Alliances
  • "Nothing to compare it too" -> This should be "Nothing to compare it to".

Chapter 40 - Redemption
  • "Shiana" -> this is a typo that occurs sometimes in this chapter. It might also occur in later chapters. Her name alternates between "Shaina" and "Shiana".
Chapter 42 - Trips, Traps and Transformations
  • "Badb Catha" -> Well translated. The "hooded crow of battle". It's not a raven per se, but close enough, and interesting in that "badb" can also be translated as "witch". Whereas Badb is the name of a war goddess, the modern form of badb is badhbh and means "vulture", "bogey-man", or even "banshee" ("badhbh chaointe" in this case)
Chapter 43 - Badb Catha
  • "She not" -> Did you mean "She's not"?

Chapter 45 - Black Blood
  • "Bel'ora-Merna" -> I could not find anything related to this. Is it an invention of yours or did I simply miss a translation somewhere?
  • "her hand down her her wrist" -> Just one "her" too many.
Chapter 46 - Awakening
  • "I was not aware of [...] no one did" -> I can see the reference from "I knew Shaina's plans" to "no one did", but is that grammatically correct? Shouldn't the second sentence rather read "no one was", in reference to "I was not aware"?
Chapter 48 - Sherith Mal
  • "Sherith Mal" -> I have no comment on this, since I could not find any translation for it. Is it a creation of yours, or is it derived from something else?
Chapter 49 - Sheeaghan
  • "Tá mé bheannaithe An Mháthair" -> And here my lack of knowledge catches up. I can't say whether I'm just unaware of this form or it is slightly out of order. "Tá mé beannaithe" (without lenition, since she is not describing herself as an object) indeed means "I am blessed", but I am unsure how to fit the Mother in there. I believe "I am the Mother's blessed" (note: regard the blessed as adjective, not as noun, and you may see why it feels strange to me) is a rough translation of what you wrote, and that does not sit well with me personally. I guess I find it preferrable to use the active form, saying "The mother blessed me" - "Bheannaigh an Mháthair mé" (Irish stays within the simple past for most cases as far as I have learned)
  • "Not much for quiet some time" -> I believe "quiet" should be replaced by "quite".
  • "You're thoughts are clouded" -> "Your thoughts are clouded"
One story point here that I did not get: Cailleach tells of the Queen of Trees that was killed two hundred years ago. Until more recently, the Unseelie relied on the High Priestess. And then she continues to tell that the High Priestess was assassinated by the Sluagh, several hundred years ago.
To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to gwyllion+u...@googlegroups.com.

Marjorie Greene

unread,
May 9, 2018, 2:20:02 PM5/9/18
to gwyl...@googlegroups.com
Wow! Okay... more walk through before I do the edits (goddess that's going to hurt).  Here we go...

On Wed, May 9, 2018 at 4:28 AM, Rafale <a177...@opayq.com> wrote:
Forgive me for taking a bit longer this time. As before, I can not guarantee 100% coverage or correctness, but I did my very best.

This story is almost two decades in the making... Take all the time you need. Seriously.
 

Chapter 8 - A friendly conversation (forgot one)
  • "Dark Sidh" -> This would most likely be either Sìdh (Scottish) or Sidhe (Irish)
 
Going with the Irish, so a fix. I think I used the Scottish version in Poppins, so I may have to address that too...

 
Chapter 12 - Illusions
  • "g‡irdean pishag" -> Character set error? Anyway, see the comment for Chapter 4

Yup. Different editing software over the years. Some of it hasn't worked out so well.
 
Chapter 19 - The Greie Leeideilagh
  • "greie leeideilagh" -> Just random info: It's Manx, and something along the line of a "direction finder" or "navigational tool". I suppose you already know that, but it might be interesting for anyone else reading this
Chapter 23 - The Refinery
  • "Ob'Ilar" -> I can only translate them separately. But do I guess correctly that you infer from Old Irish and basically call it a "River of Multitude"? Perhaps more poetically translated as "Stream of Possibilities"?

This one is Brownie, so no translation (yet). Fae Common is a little like Esperanto in that it's a mix of a number of different languages. It's also a cheat for those of us who don't actually speak the languages they are based on...

 
Chapter 28 - Cuts and Curses
  • "Lámind Argid" -> Just two minor spelling issues here: One additional fada, and one additional i: "Lámínd Airgid". I couldn't find a proper translation for lámínd, but it seems to be an alternative form of lámann, which means "glove" or "sleeve" (derived from lámh - hand) 
Chapter 30 - Beta Testing
  • "a half cup in a any one day" -> I believe the second "a" does not belong there.

Nope.
 
Chapter 33 - Advocates
  • "Anam Figh" -> I really like the term. The grammar is slightly off though. I assume you did a literal translation of "Soul Weave" or "Life Weave"? Unfortunately, Figh is a verb, the noun being fíochán. Simply replacing the word like that would most likely make this the "Soul of the web", so they'd have to be swapped to form "Fíochán Anam", the Soul Weave, if I'm not entirely wrong.
Updated. 
 
  • "As a Leth" -> "Out of her side"? That would certainly fit the context, although I don't know if the preposition is the correct choice. Unfortunately, choosing the right prepositions in Irish is somewhat of a weak spot for me ;-)
I'll leave it for now.
 
Chapter 38 - Updates and Alliances
  • "Nothing to compare it too" -> This should be "Nothing to compare it to".

Fixed. 

Chapter 40 - Redemption
  • "Shiana" -> this is a typo that occurs sometimes in this chapter. It might also occur in later chapters. Her name alternates between "Shaina" and "Shiana".

Shaina is correct. Somehow I got off track for Chapter 40. I have a database for characters... you would think it would keep me in line.
 
Chapter 42 - Trips, Traps and Transformations
  • "Badb Catha" -> Well translated. The "hooded crow of battle". It's not a raven per se, but close enough, and interesting in that "badb" can also be translated as "witch". Whereas Badb is the name of a war goddess, the modern form of badb is badhbh and means "vulture", "bogey-man", or even "banshee" ("badhbh chaointe" in this case)
Chapter 43 - Badb Catha
  • "She not" -> Did you mean "She's not"?

Yup. 

Chapter 45 - Black Blood
  • "Bel'ora-Merna" -> I could not find anything related to this. Is it an invention of yours or did I simply miss a translation somewhere?
Brownie.

 
  • "her hand down her her wrist" -> Just one "her" too many.
Fixed
 
Chapter 46 - Awakening
  • "I was not aware of [...] no one did" -> I can see the reference from "I knew Shaina's plans" to "no one did", but is that grammatically correct? Shouldn't the second sentence rather read "no one was", in reference to "I was not aware"?

Corrected 
Chapter 48 - Sherith Mal
  • "Sherith Mal" -> I have no comment on this, since I could not find any translation for it. Is it a creation of yours, or is it derived from something else?
The term is my own. It is derived from "Old Fae", which is another cheat so that I can create terms that don't need literal translations.  :)

 
Chapter 49 - Sheeaghan
  • "Tá mé bheannaithe An Mháthair" -> And here my lack of knowledge catches up. I can't say whether I'm just unaware of this form or it is slightly out of order. "Tá mé beannaithe" (without lenition, since she is not describing herself as an object) indeed means "I am blessed", but I am unsure how to fit the Mother in there. I believe "I am the Mother's blessed" (note: regard the blessed as adjective, not as noun, and you may see why it feels strange to me) is a rough translation of what you wrote, and that does not sit well with me personally. I guess I find it preferrable to use the active form, saying "The mother blessed me" - "Bheannaigh an Mháthair mé" (Irish stays within the simple past for most cases as far as I have learned)
I'm going to leave that one, since I almost certainly pulled it directly from someone else in research. Unless of course, we can confirm inaccuracy... Sadly, many of the resources I used when I originally wrote this have long since disappeared from the internet.
 
  • "Not much for quiet some time" -> I believe "quiet" should be replaced by "quite".
  • "You're thoughts are clouded" -> "Your thoughts are clouded"
GAH! Hate it when I do that...
 
One story point here that I did not get: Cailleach tells of the Queen of Trees that was killed two hundred years ago. Until more recently, the Unseelie relied on the High Priestess. And then she continues to tell that the High Priestess was assassinated by the Sluagh, several hundred years ago.

Good catch. I have updated the chapter to correct the problem here, which was that I confused the High Priestess with the Queen of Trees. The Unseelie Dominion Queen was killed 200 years past. The High Priestess was assassinated much before that. There is an unwritten sub story for that. I always hoped to put it down, but it's a side track that would best be completed AFTER I get off my arse and finish the Academy Series.

 
Thank you so very much for these, Rafale. Please don't feel like you have any obligation to continue. I'll take any corrections you find, or course, but I know how editing a story can suck the joy from reading it. (oh my, yes) One of the nice things about doing this as a living web document, is that I CAN edit.

Marjorie

Rafale

unread,
May 9, 2018, 3:13:52 PM5/9/18
to Gwyllion
Not at all! Believe you me, I'm having fun. And it's a good way to brush up on my Irish skills, which are lacking a bit more than they should, as I have been slacking off in the last few months.
I'm currently re-reading Poppins' Return and plan on going through the rest of the TFTF after that.

Slán
Rafale

Rafale

unread,
May 15, 2018, 5:14:48 AM5/15/18
to Gwyllion

This is what I found in Poppins' Return. Nothing gaelic this time, mostly typos.


Chapter 1 - Brightly House

  • "stary-eyed" -> I think this should read "starry-eyed".
  • "take like a man" -> Should probably be "take it like a man"


Chapter 3 - Time Space History 101

  • "fairy tails" -> I do believe that some of the Fae would take offense at that, so I suggest replacing it with "fairy tales".


Chapter 5 - After dinner mints

  • "You're an Adapt" -> "You're an Adept"


Chapter 6 - Guns, O-rings and good luck

  • "Willie Coyote" -> His name is actually Wile E. Coyote


Chapter 7 - The proof is in the...

  • "preverbal" -> Did you mean "proverbial"?


Chapter 8 - Bump in the night

  • "your just like all" -> “You're just like all"


Chapter 9 - Battle Ground

  • "Daoine Sidh" -> "Fae People" or "Fairy People" if I translate it correctly. Although it is spelt "daoine sidhe" in Irish, and "daoine sìth" in Scottish.


Chapter 11 - Patrons

  • “fopas” -> “faux pas”


Chapter 12 - Glyphs

  • “she beaconed me” -> “she beckoned me”

A question here as well: X’carin says she was too young to have a right to Marly’s mother. X’carin is almost 150 years old. How did the dryad go from “too young” to “feared so much nobody goes against her” in less than 20 years, when she couldn’t manage it in at least five to six times that many.


Chapter 20 - Resurrection

  • “The later I would be ready for” -> I’m not an expert on this, but I think it should be “The latter”

JyoNaythan

unread,
May 16, 2018, 8:15:39 PM5/16/18
to Gwyllion
  • "Willie Coyote" -> His name is actually Wile E. Coyote
Willie is actually his down-to-earth 'non-genius' alter ego.  Poor thing has MPD. 

Rafale

unread,
May 26, 2018, 3:58:43 AM5/26/18
to Gwyllion
Well, with how many hits on the head he got, it's no wonder he has some mental troubles.

Anyway, next round of corrections incoming. I couldn't find anything in Little Lost Nymph and Faerie Tale, but Songsmith had a few things. I'll do Unseelie Summer next when I have the time.

Chapter 2 - Invitations
  • "Marcus de Danaan" -> This probably slipped the rest of the "dé" corrections because of the typo in "Danann". This one happens multiple times in this chapter.
Chapter 3 - Jane
  • "Marcus de Danann" -> Just the "dé" this time.
Chapter 4 - Gaia
  • "within the De Danann" -> "Dé" again
  • "collesed" -> Did you mean "coalesced"?
  • "interract" -> "interact"
  • "an act one of mercy" -> I believe "one" is superfluous here
  • "irrevokably" -> "irrevocably"
  • "the de Danann would be" -> "dé" again, although when Gaia talks about them, I feel "Tuatha" would be more appropriate, as she would otherwise be talking about herself in the third person… which somehow doesn’t fit with her portrayal I think.
  • "develope" -> "develop"
  • "Dispite" -> "Despite"
Chapter 5 - Awakening
  • "reconoitering" -> "reconnoitring"
Reply all
Reply to author
Forward
0 new messages